20 Hours in L.A.

Previously on The West Wing: Zoey asked Charlie out; her father was less than thrilled about it; Josh was jolted out of a hangover stupor by an angry Joey Lucas; the President told VP Hoynes that he shouldn't have had to beg him to be his running mate; Jed told Zoey that he's increasing her Secret Service protection.

It's 2:38 AM EST. Leo and POTUS are in the back of a limousine talking. Jed's rambling about how he doesn't enjoy putting VPOTUS in the position of having to cast a tie-breaking vote in the Senate on the issue of an ethanol tax credit. Neither of them actually mention the VP, but they didn't need to; it's somehow obvious. Jed's noting the irony of it all, and Leo agrees but not enthusiastically enough for Jed, I guess, because Jed asks him, "Are you being brusque with me?" Leo responds, "It's three o'clock in the morning." POTUS replies, "I'm just saying, you can't blame me. That's what you get from having an even number of senators." Leo says, "Yeah, you should blame the Constitution." POTUS: "That's what I usually do." Leo: "Yup!" The President then asks his driver if he's going to meet "her" on the plane, and the driver says that he will. POTUS tells Leo that Zoey has a new Secret Service agent, and describes how these new agents have "the hair, the backpacks, the clothes," and they're walking around campus with .44 Magnums and wires in their ear. Leo says, "They really blend in, huh?" POTUS replies, "Let me tell you something, when it's your kid, you don't want 'em blending in. You want 'em wearing a sign that says, 'I'm carrying a loaded gun and the safety's off.'" Leo then starts haranguing POTUS about his health, asking him to rest if he gets tired, and to consider staying at the hotel for the night, but Jed wants to come right home after the fund-raiser that evening. Leo tells him it's really no good for him. POTUS reassures him, "It'll be fine." Leo: "Be that way." Jed replies, "Your impersonation of my mother is getting sharper and sharper, you know that?" Leo smiles and says, "Thank you." Jed chuckles. How much do I want to see Jed's parents now, when I've actually never given them one thought before? They're at the airport and the limo stops to Air Force One. Leo wishes him a good flight, as POTUS calls out, "C.J.! Charlie! My travelling companions!" No doubt C.J. can't wait to be on another flight with POTUS after the "gruesome" trip to Stockholm two weeks ago. As the three of them board the plane, POTUS asks C.J. if the press is in a good mood. C.J. responds, "No, Mr. President, I wouldn't say they were." POTUS wants to know why not, and she explains that "they're not wild about taking off at three o'clock in the morning, sir." POTUS hollers, "Aw, it's gonna be great! We're going to race the sun to the Pacific horizon!" C.J. says, "I'll tell them that, sir. I'm sure it'll pick 'em right up!"

POTUS greets everyone on the plane as he strides in, and says, "Sam, it's going to be fifty-fifty on the ethanol tax credit." Sam suggests that he can still make a couple of calls, but Jed tells him he can make all the calls he wants but the vote will be the same. Toby says that he and Josh would like the opportunity to speak with him about the "Al Kiefer meeting." POTUS says, "You two are so freaked out about this Al Kiefer meeting." Josh tries to say something and POTUS tells him to listen to Kiefer. Josh says, "Yes, sir." POTUS picks up a phone and as he presses a button, he asks, "You two want to see the best part about having my job?" Josh and Toby don't answer, as POTUS says into the receiver, "Colonel, this is the President. I'm ready to go." Both Professor Frink and I are duly impressed as the credits and commercials run. I am especially impressed as I have had not one, but two trips to California ruined by Air Canada's inability to get a plane off the ground any earlier than three or four hours after the appointed time. What I wouldn't give for a plane to leave on my say-so. Amusingly enough, the commercials include one for American Airlines, advertising more room in their coach class. It rather pales in comparison to Air Force One.

It's 3:45 AM EST. On the plane, the staffers are chatting. I'd think they'd be trying to sleep, since they won't get any sleep for close to another twenty-four hours, and they've got quite a long day ahead of them, but then how interesting would that be for us? Donna and C.J. are playing cards and chatting about different sunblocks -- Clinique, Lancôme, Elizabeth Arden. Toby says, "The two of you understand we're going to be in California for one day?" C.J. replies that there's tanning time between two and four, and Donna adds, "And I have sensitive alabaster skin." She does look like she'd fry pretty fast. C.J. says, "Me too." Josh announces that someone named Cameron is going to introduce a bill that morning. Without opening his eyes, Sam, who seems to be the only one trying to get some shut-eye, asks, "Gays in the military?" Josh confirms Sam's suspicion, and C.J. asks, "It's Cameron. Who cares?" Josh thinks Ted Marcus might care. Sam thinks Marcus won't know; Josh thinks he might. Toby suggests a response: "You were in here all night, you don't know anything, you'll get back to him." C.J. reiterates, "Plus it's Cameron, so who cares?" Josh still thinks Marcus will care. Just then Charlie comes up and says, "C.J.? You wanted me to let you know when it looked like he was headed for the cockpit?" C.J. thanks him as she puts down her cards, saying, "This man has got to be stopped."

Charlie walks to where Zoey is reading on a couch and sits down. ["It must be said that, since the last time she was on the show, Elisabeth Moss has had her teeth capped. Not that there's anything wrong with that -- it's not like she looks like Madonna in The Best Thing -- but she has." -- Wing Chun]

Charlie: Listen, I don't know if I'm going to be able to be as attentive on this trip as you'd like.
Zoey: That's okay, you're working.
Charlie: Well I've been trying to listen to some of the many lessons you've been giving me on how to be a better boyfriend, and I know that attentiveness...
Zoey: No, this is one of the times when it's okay.
Charlie: Okay. It's hard to tell the difference between those times and the other times.
Zoey: I know. Doesn't that suck for you?
Charlie: A little bit, yeah.

A Secret Service guy walks up to the door of POTUS's Air Force One office with ER's Maggie Doyle. As he knocks on the door, he advises her, "Don't be nervous." She nods and agrees but seems kind of nervous to me, regardless. Jed tells them to come in and the Secret Service guy introduces her to POTUS as Special Agent Gina Toscano. The Secret Service guy takes off, as POTUS apologizes for having been unable to meet her until now. POTUS asks her a series of questions and we quickly learn that she's been on Zoey's detail for two weeks, and she was in the Army via the Army ROTC at the University of Virginia. There's some back-and-forth about whether she's a mountaineer, but owing to some factor relating to West Virginia, she is apparently a cavalier. I have no idea what this is about but someone can probably explain it to me in the forums. Gina's degree is in Criminology, and she was commissioned a second lieutenant with military police. She is twenty-seven, and has trained for this assignment for a year and a half. POTUS says, "What, were you the first one to sign up?" She smiles a bit and admits, "Yes, sir." POTUS seems pleased and invites her to sit down. He mentions the Charlie-and-Zoey situation. She's aware of it, and she's also aware of "the letters" which have previously been alluded to in the "Lord John Marbury" episode. POTUS wants to know whether the letters are coming from white supremacists. Gina replies that she can't say for sure, but that they've been working closely with the Southern Poverty Law Centre's database. He asks whether they have any sketches or psychological profiles or anything. She says that they don't, but adds, "I know what I'm looking for in a crowd, if that's what you're asking me, sir." ["Am I the only one hoping that we'll eventually learn that the letters are coming from inside the White House? And that they're actually meant for Mandy?" -- Strega] ["Ooh. Burn! And, also, HA!" -- Wing Chun] POTUS looks incredibly serious as he says, "It is." Satisfied that Gina is qualified to protect his daughter, he mentions that Zoey's nineteen, and she just wants to be have the college experience, and he doesn't blame her; he loved college and so did his other daughters. (The mention of his daughters causes me to reflect on the wisdom Aaron Sorkin showed in not creating any sons for Bartlet, so we can be spared the spectacle of either Charlie or Emilio appearing as Jed's offspring.) POTUS explains to Gina that he really wants Zoey to be comfortable with her protection, so that she won't try to give her agent the slip. "It's not your job to tell me if she's cutting English Lit; it's not your job to tell me if she's dying her hair blue, or going to a strip club, or whatever she's doing with her friends. You know what your job is." She sure does. He thanks her and shakes her hand, and she also thanks him. As she's leaving, he says, "If she's cutting English Lit, I want to know about it." Gina replies, "No deal, Mr. President." POTUS dismisses her with a friendly wave of his hand. For some reason this scene made me very emotional. I'm also willing to bet that, given the number of times the subject of Zoey's safety has come up this season, and the effort just expended on establishing Gina's character, Sorkin is building toward either a kidnapping or an attempt on Zoey's life for May sweeps. (Insomuch as Sorkin plans anything; it's well-known he writes this show flying by the seat of his pants.)

Back in Washington, it's 6:30 AM EST. Leo arrives at work. He's talking to two guys about the ethanol tax credit, mentioning that ethanol accounts for twenty percent of Iowa's corn crop. One of the two guys mentions that the tax credit created sixteen thousand new jobs. Leo's opinion is that they didn't state that point often enough. The two guys want to know if it's over; Leo informs them that Sam's been phoning senators from the plane for the last hour and half (no doubt making many friends by waking them up at 5:00 AM EST to argue about a tax credit), and that the time his phone rings, it'll be Sam telling him it's over. One of the guys says, "At least we're going to win." Leo just says, "Yeah," in a way that sounds like "So what?" Leo goes over to his desk, the two guys disappear, and Margaret comes in with some papers for him to sign. She's got a tight tone in her voice. He starts to sign one in the wrong place, and in a sulky tone says, "Where it says your name, Leo. You're not the Belgian Foreign Minister." Leo looks at her, although she's looking away from him, and reminds her that he said he was sorry. Margaret says that she's not upset. He says that he had to stay behind for this, and that there'll be other trips. She says she knows that there'll be other trips, just not to California. He says there will, and she asks when. Leo responds, "They got fifty-four electoral votes out there. Something tells me we're not going to be strangers." The phone rings and Margaret gets it; it's Sam. As he takes the phone, Leo tells Margaret to get Hoynes over to his office.

Back on Air Force One, it's 5:40 AM PST. C.J. gently goes about waking up the various members of the press to brief everybody on the itinerary, since they'll be landing in a few minutes. ["Couldn't she have done that at the start of the flight, when everyone was awake?" -- Strega] She mentions that they're on schedule, and that the President will be greeted at the airport by a couple of congressmen, the mayor and various city councilors; photos only. They'll depart the airport for the hotel at 6:20, at which time C.J. predicts they will no longer be on schedule. That went off the rails pretty fast. We get a montage of the plane landing, the limos driving through Los Angeles ["...specifically, through Westchester, two towns over from where Glark and I used to live. I recognized it because of this crazy-ass building that used to be a movie theatre, but that's full of medical offices now. Many's the time Glark and I frequented the Ralph's, Blockbuster Video, and Boston Market in that neighbourhood, and giggled at the sight of Mantrap Nails. But I digress." -- Wing Chun], and arriving at the hotel as she continues. C.J. indicates that POTUS will get his morning security briefing, followed by two hours of personal staff time, after which they will be leaving for a meeting in Orange County concerning a Constitutional amendment to prohibit flag burning. At 3:00 PM they attend a meeting on school vouchers in South Central Los Angeles, which is followed by the big event, a fund-raiser at the home of Theodore Marcus. C.J. instructs them that they will wear coats and ties and stay in the roped-off press area outside the party unless they've got fifty thousand bucks per couple to "get a look at the good stuff." She concludes, "Welcome to Los Angeles, where the local time is 5:40 AM and the temperature is, ooh, a balmy seventy-three degrees." For the rest of the world, that's twenty two point eight degrees Celsius. ["It's seventy-three degrees in L.A., and it's not even six? Is this a global warming subplot?" -- Strega] ["I can believe it. Ugh." -- Wing Chun]