The scene opens in a beautiful, huge, wood-panelled office. Two men and a woman are arguing about, so far as I can tell, whether current security policies toward travellers of Arab and/or Muslim descent are "Korematsu all over again." The woman seems to think that a case can be made for such policies being in the government's interest. The two guys think otherwise. Guy #1 says, "There has to be a less discriminatory way to go about it than frisking every Tom, Dick, and Hamid with a boarding pass." Guy #2 bets a pickle that "Tom" isn't an Arab name. Give that man a pickle. The woman says, "There's a reason Korematsu's never been overturned." Guy #1: "Okay, you're defending Japanese internment? you're going to tell me Dred Scott got lost looking for I-95." Heh. They keep arguing. We learn that the woman's name is Lisa. There is also some yatter about potato chips. They're all sitting around a large conference table. Eventually, we see that at the end of table, there's an elderly man. It's Milo O'Shea, playing Chief Justice Roy Ashland. I love Milo O'Shea, even if his eyebrows give Peter Gallagher's a run for their money. He played Friar Laurence in Zeffirelli's version of Romeo and Juliet, which is one of my all-time favourite films. Anyway, Ashland starts muttering, "Matt...Matt?" Lisa's confused: "Matt, sir?" He gets up slowly, saying, "I have to do the subcite before class....finish my con law reading..." He starts to put on his robe as Lisa apologizes for not understanding what he's talking about. A buzzer sounds as an assistant comes to the door to tell him, "They're ready for you, Mr. Chief Justice." He's so slow putting on his robe that the assistant gently asks if he needs help. He doesn't answer, but just trudges slowly out the door. In the hallway just outside, he suddenly collapses face-first. Everyone starts hollering for an ambulance and rushing to his side.
Toby arrives at work, and is talking to C.J. as he heads for his office. Toby, obviously anticipating Ashland's imminent demise, seems to be working on a eulogy/statement. He incorporates the phrase "a man, not a monument," at which C.J. reminds him that she has to be careful about saying "man." Toby: "Why, 'cause...? Aw, come on..." C.J.: "You'd be surprised. I get letters." Toby: "Fine. 'Human being,' then. Or do the other mammals complain?" As Toby reaches his office, he finds Will hanging around outside and asks, "Who said you could come in here?" Will says it's all right; he's over the flu. Toby: "Oh, you had the flu?" Will asks if they're discussing potential replacements for Ashland yet. Toby says, "Grandin, Keith, and Toland, and no, we're not talking about them." Will wonders, "So if the Vice-President had a few additional names not to talk about, where would he offer not to...?" Toby just gives him a look. Will: "Never mind, I think I can guess." C.J. tells Will to take it to the Counsel's Office. Will says he's leaving. C.J. tells Will that Toby had another researcher quit. Apparently, it's the third one since Will left. Yes, but Will wasn't a researcher, was he? So what's the connection? Is it just that Toby's crankypants are binding in the crotch? Will asks, "Let me guess: she was turned off by the vow of poverty?" Toby: "You still here?" Will: "Flowers say, 'I'm sorry.'" Toby: "Leave." He does, and C.J. comments to Toby, "You seem...happy." He does? Toby doesn't understand her comment either. C.J.: "Happy. You know, the sensation your fellow mammalians occasionally experience?" Toby: "Haffley's treating the discretionary budget like a chew toy. We're about to cave on tax cuts for billionaires and who the hell knows what else Angela Blake is giving away in there. But you know what? We're going to appoint a new Chief Justice. Breathe new life into the Constitution. You know how rare that is? The last five guys didn't get to do it. We're going to shape the future of jurisprudence, the laws that sustain our whole society -- or shove somebody in there to strike down these godawful excuses for laws the Republicans are passing." Will sticks his head back in to give them some news. Toby: "Enough already. Buffalo Bob's not going to pick the Chief Justice." Will: "Neither is the President. Ashland regained consciousness. Seems it was only exhaustion, and his doctors are saying he'll make a full recovery." Credits.
Josh is in his office watching C.J.'s press briefing. He looks crappy. He asks Donna, "Do we have any of those pills left from that Naval doctor?" Donna: "Admiral Feelgood?" Josh specifies the "cold and sinus stuff." As opposed to the Viagra and Vicodin the guy was also pushing, I guess. Donna: "The ones that made you sing all of 'Bye, Bye, Miss American Pie' [sic]?" Josh says it was Harry Chapin, and they were big blue pills. Josh, you picked the blue pill? Boring. Donna: "Bet you looked cute on that gurney when the airmen had to carry you off Air Force One." Josh claims that C.J. made that up. Donna offers him some echinacea. He doesn't want anything "natural." See? Soy chai, my ass. "I need the industrial-strength, full-throttle, roto-rooter stuff." Donna hands him something and says that some guy from the Times called about the budget stalemate. Josh says he doesn't know anything. Donna told the guy as much. She quickly claims that she didn't say that exactly, but explained that Josh was busy with other stuff and couldn't take calls from the press. Josh says that Donna should have told the guy that Josh was in the Oval Office, and wants to know why that didn't occur to her. She says she told the guy that Josh was working on the President's trip to Japan. She adds that he's only supposed to take one of the pills she's given him. Josh appears not to be listening, so Donna advises, "Stay away from heavy machinery." Josh, through a mouthful of pills, "Fortunately Pa and I brought in the last of the winter wheat yesterday, so I don't have to operate the combine." Heh. Donna wonders what happens if they can't work out a budget; he tells her they get another continuing resolution. Donna: "See, here's what I don't get: every year we take these budget extensions, like the dog ate our homework...." Josh: "The Republican Majority, but you're close." Donna: "How come people aren't outraged? The rest of the country can't take endless amounts of time to finish their work." She clearly hasn't worked with some of the people I have. Josh says she's forgetting the beauty of the federal budget process: "No one understands it."
Charlie chugs alongside C.J. as she hustles through the hall, telling her he got some call from a guy at ABC. C.J., concerned, says the guy works for Diane Mathers. The guy wanted to ask Charlie about his statement to the Secret Service the night of Zoey's kidnapping. C.J. wants to know if he told the guy anything about the Ecstasy. Charlie says of course he didn't; he just took the guy's name and got off the phone: "What was I supposed to do?" C.J. says he did fine, and that she'll handle it from here.
As Leo arrives at work, Toby complains about Ashland's not taking Bartlet's calls. Leo says he doesn't think there are a lot of phones in the ICU. Toby is surprised to hear that Ashland's in intensive care, since CNN is reporting that it's just exhaustion. Toby mentions that Ashland is eighty-four; Leo points out his grandfather lived to be ninety. Toby: "My grandfather lived to be ninety-six, but the last twenty years he thought the Habsburgs still lived in a big palace in Vienna. How long before this gets dangerous, Leo? Before we've got a cadaver up there, ruling on when life begins?" Leo points out Ashland is a lifelong ally of Bartlet's. Toby replies, "We're talking about an empty robe, and I don't like this any more than you do. If Roy Ashland were a religion, I'd convert. But what happens if we wait until he's senile and ends up in a coma? We -- we go to a Republican Congress to -- to impeach? Haffley will never do that. He'll leave Ashland on a respirator until one of their guys gets to wear the windbreaker on Air Force One."
Leo and Toby arrive at Leo's office, and Will's waiting there. Will asks how the budget negotiations are going; Leo says they went until midnight last night and started again at 6:00 AM. Will wonders if Angela's in over her head; Leo says that things were already a mess: "Angela's going to make the best deal she can and get us out of there in one piece." Toby says that if Ashland won't take Bartlet's calls, maybe they should send someone over. Leo sneers, "What, just show up with a bunch of balloons and some peanut brittle?" Toby says they have to get Ashland off the bench. Will: "There's this thing called the Constitution. It's a nagging little document, I'll grant you..." Leo asks Toby, "What's this about you breaking somebody's coffee mug?" Toby doesn't know what Leo's talking about. I wonder if that was Fifi. Leo says that Personnel told him another of Toby's researchers quit, after he broke her coffee mug. Margaret helpfully volunteers, "It was a ceramic hippo." I'll bet Toby broke it on principle. You can see how he'd be a big fan of cutesy coffee mugs. Toby claims, "It got in the way of a misfiled copy of the Congressional Record I was...." Leo: "You were refiling with your throwing arm?" Toby wants to get back to Ashland, but Leo wants to talk about Toby's problem retaining staff. Margaret tells Leo that Jed's ready for him, and Leo tells Toby, "Stop breaking things. I don't need the victims of Hippogate filing class-action suits."
Leo opens the door to the Oval Office, where Jed's giving a weather report and saying it's time to break out the Irish fishing sweater that C.J. says makes him look like an Irish fisherman. C.J. and Josh enter from the other direction; C.J. doesn't want Josh to sit to her. He claims he's past the infectious stage, but he dutifully shuffles off to a more distant seat. C.J. mentions to Jed that she's not happy about Zoey's being interviewed by Diane Mathers. Jed shuts her down, saying that Abby thinks it will be fine, and he does, too. He asks Leo where Angela is; Leo explains what long hours she's been working on the budget, but assures him that she'll be there soon. Will's at this meeting, too, which wouldn't be so strange if at any other point in the last four years it were usual to have the Communications Director for VPOTUS attend senior staff meetings, but since that's not the case...the hell? I mean, I'm happy to see Josh Malina get screen time, but could we have it make some kind of sense?
Toby and Jed discuss the Ashland situation. Toby says they can't get anyone to confirm that it was just exhaustion. Bartlet's already giving the guy's eulogy: "Roy was a great friend, a great man...." Toby broaches the subject of Ashland's possible incapacity, but Jed says that Roy is the best judge of that. Josh makes a mild but undignified sound with his jaw and everyone looks at him. He apologizes and explains his medicated state, adding that he thinks he just lost hearing in his left ear. C.J. sneezes. Leo: "Oh, for God's...God bless you." Nice recovery there, Leo. I'm sure nobody noticed your instant reaction of irritation. C.J. insists that she's not getting it. Josh says he's getting over it. Will says he's completely over it.
Angela arrives, apologizing for being late. She says they're very close: "Fifty billion -- but the Speaker will only give us the college-tuition tax deduction if we reduce capital-gains taxes by 50% and accept a 10% corporate rate cut in our stimulus plan. Mr. President, I know this is painful, but if we offer to drop deductible tuition, I think we can get them to drop cap gains and leave our stimulus." I don't know what to make of Angela. I don't like her; I don't dislike her. She's just...there. Sort of like this episode. Toby's pissed: "Excuse me? What are we talking about?" Angela: "The proposed deduction." Toby wants to know when that was put on the table. C.J. reminds Angela that it was a major campaign promise. Toby: "It was one of our centrepieces of our re-elect!" Toby looks at Josh and asks if he's just going to sit there. Josh is uncharacteristically subdued, even taking his medicated state into account. He shrugs and says, "You gotta trust the person in the room." Jed asks Angela if they can do this without the deficit's exceeding $200 billion. She says they can. Jed says, "Then everything else is on the table." Josh looks disappointed but not surprised, and Jed breaks up the meeting.
C.J. and Leo hang around, while Jed gripes: "Two-hundred-billion-dollar deficit, and Haffley wants tax cuts. Take away a few zeroes, and he'd pass for a mob accountant." C.J. comes at Jed again about the Mathers interview; she gets him to agree that she should go up to Manchester and prepare Zoey. She thanks him and leaves. Leo tells Jed, "If you'd like, sir, you could travel up with C.J. We could check with Advance..." Jed: "And Abby? Who's going to check with her?" Leo decides that's a snake pit he'd rather not go poking sticks into right now, and moves on to Ashland: "Do you think we should try to...." Jed: "Yeah. It's time." Leo thanks him and leaves. Jed warns Leo as he's going to "do it delicately."
Angela catches up to Josh in the hall, where he's molesting his nose with a Kleenex. She says that she needs to get a counter-offer out by this afternoon, and that she's been told by OMB that he has all the current budget documents. Josh says they started on that a couple of months ago. Angela: "[It'd] be great if I could get it, and borrow a body to help me slog through it." Josh says he's got a lot on his plate right now. Angela's been told by someone at OMB that someone named Donna knows the documents inside out: "I'd owe you a hell of a swordfish steak at Kinkead's." Yeah, I'll bet swordfish sounds real tasty to Josh about now. And why wouldn't he want to spend the evening having dinner with his replacement? Even dinner with Swimtern probably seems a more appetizing prospect. Anyway, Josh gives up Donna, too, in his weakened state. Angela: "You're a prince."
Toby's been summoned back to Leo's office. He gripes about sacrificing the deductible-college-tuition plan: "What's ? We could save a few bucks by shuttering the East Wing, turning the South Lawn into the mother of all garage sales." Leo says he's charging Toby with the responsibility for giving Ashland the bum's ru-- I mean, "easing him out of his position." Toby: "That's not so simple." Leo: "That's why I'm giving it to you." Toby says they can't force Ashland to resign. Leo agrees and takes off, leaving Toby to ponder his own resignation.
Toby finds Joe Quincy (remember him?) in the hallway. Matthew Perry's doing a fine job, and he fits in well, but I just can't stop seeing Chandler. I suppose that will go away in time, like in thirty or forty years. Toby mentions that Joe clerked for Ashland, and says that it's interesting. Joe can't imagine why that would be terribly interesting, but is polite about it. Toby: "Guys around here with two-bit appellate clerkships staple it to their foreheads." Joe quickly susses Toby's interest in his relationship to Ashland, and says he can't do it. He walks away, and Toby follows, claiming he didn't say anything about getting Joe to approach Ashland about resigning. Joe says he can do the math: "You've got a limited amount of time to pick the guy and get him confirmed before the midterms politicize everything. But I work for you. It's a question of propriety." Toby: "I see." Joe: "Do you? The White House can't be seen pressuring a Supreme Court Justice to change his breakfast order, let alone resign. Separation of powers." Toby: "I see." Joe: "You say that, but in a way that makes me wonder if you really do." Joe starts to wander away as Toby says, "The President sets the direction of the court. I've read the Constitution, too." Joe points out that POTUS sets the court's direction when there's a vacancy. Toby: "You don't have to ask him to resign; only to sit down with the President." Joe replies, "You're talking about a guy that stood up to six administrations, twenty-two Congresses, and at one time or another, had half the country ready to lynch him. You think a former clerk can pry him loose?" He stalks off to a meeting at the OEOB.
Donna complains, "What am I, chattel?" This is news to you, Donna? Josh says he authorized the request from Angela's office for budget documents. Donna's surprised, and mentions that they also asked for her along with the files: "A living index, if you will, for Angela Blake." Josh wearily says that they can call her "Angela" now. Donna: "You authorized that, too?" Josh: "Sure." Donna looks vaguely hurt. Man, Josh, you'll tell her there's no tooth fairy. Josh asks whether someone named Hamurashi ever got specifics on the trade bill. Donna hands him the relevant file.
Charlie approaches C.J.'s office, where C.J.'s barking out instructions to Carol. He stands at the door listening to her carrying on, until finally, getting no response from Carol, she asks, "Carol?" Charlie: "She's not out here." C.J. says she was just talking to her. Oh, well. If that was supposed to be hilarious, it wasn't. And what's with C.J.'s hair? It's all kinda flipped back in this scene, like a modified Farrah 'do. And she's wearing a long, flowing skirt and boots with her jacket, something she rarely wears. I'm going to call this look "PMS week." Charlie asks C.J. to give Zoey a CD for him. C.J. takes it, saying, "I love Macy Gray." Ooh! Me, too. I've been playing her third album to death for a couple of months. It looks like Charlie gave her that one, The Trouble With Being Myself. Charlie says, "Zoey's been in a solo-whispery- female-acoustic kind of rut right now. I'm trying to get her to listen to something with drums." C.J. suggests John Philip Sousa. Charlie: "Drums, but not so much with the batons." Word. Charlie says his mother used to watch Diane Mathers's old talk show all the time: "She seemed nice, sympathetic, sincere." C.J.: "This is a woman who gets dictators to cry, talk about their love of puppies and mama's cooking...confess they had the concentration camps built because they couldn't get a date for the prom." So she's a Baba Wawa stand-in. Charlie assures her that Zoey will be fine. C.J.: "So everyone keeps saying." She asks if POTUS has changed his mind about coming. Charlie says he hasn't. C.J. leaves, saying, "I thought he would in the end." I don't get the impression that it's up to Jed, frankly.
Donna and Angela are in the Roosevelt Room as an assistant hands out documents for a meeting. Donna explains the whole inspiring Matt Kelley aspect of how Josh and Toby came up with the college-tuition-deduction idea. Angela seems indifferent to the idea of helping regular schmoes put their kids through college: "If his daughter needed braces, would Josh and Toby have come up with a plan for universal orthodontia?" Well, what kind of asshat would compare perfect teeth to the value of a college education? Though I realize there are times when in North America it seems like perfect teeth will get you farther. Donna asks, "Not a chance, huh?" Angela says that they can still get it, but that they've got to get the Republicans to give it. She asks Donna, "How do you think we're doing?" Donna looks at her a couple of times, and smiles, pleased and puzzled that someone's asking her opinion in a way that doesn't suggest that her comments will be played for laughs. After years of serving Josh, Donna's brain can't quite comprehend it: "Me? I'm not the...." Angela: "You're an American citizen. You pay taxes, consume government services." Donna considers this carefully and says, "I think...our side's done a bad job of explaining why what we're fighting for is important." Angela's actually looking at Donna, and listening to her, like Donna might actually have something worthwhile to say, instead of not realizing it until after she's said something. I might be liking Angela better now. Donna continues, "It's not about abstract programs and endless acronyms, but about real things that affect real people, like affording college." Angela: "You talk to Josh about that?" Donna just looks like that's a subject she'd rather not discuss. Yup, I'd say someone's about to be lured away from the highly rewarding job of being Josh's babysitter/ caretaker/ gofer/ dogsbody.
Joe goes into the room, finding Ashland unconscious and on a respirator. We get a good long shot of the respirator. Joe looks around at the medical equipment, and then pulls the sheet over Ashland's legs. Joe just stares at him.
Outside on the street, Joe tells Toby that he gave Ashland POTUS's regards. Toby asks what he said, and whether Ashland was coherent. Joe doesn't answer, but says that he didn't want people to know he clerked for Ashland because he knew somebody, someday, would ask him to do something like this. Toby: "Is that right?" Joe: "You guys. You think it's all a game. You're treating the Court like it's Tammany Hall gone national!" Toby replies, "And your side does it better? Pushing neoconservatives in swaddling clothes, hoping they don't grow a conscience -- let alone a meagre understanding of jurisprudence?" Joe: "Maybe we could all do it better...but there is such a thing called judicial independence. A lifetime appointment! He's still alive, so he gets to decide when it's time!" Toby asks what Ashland said: "Or can he even speak?" Joe lies through his teeth, telling Toby Ashland's fine: "He was up...joking. He'll be back in chambers in a couple of days." He walks away, leaving Toby on the sidewalk.
As C.J. arrives at the farm in Manchester, I can't help feeling we're going to reprise the cider scene. Except that standing on the porch to where Zoey's sitting is a tired, much older version of Betty Rizzo instead of the cider-denying Abby Bartlet. Clothing-wise, Abby always farms it up whenever she's in Manchester, which is fine, but does her hair need to look like it's been styled by a fertilizer spreader? Why Stockard Channing's hair almost always looks bad on this show is one of the enduring mysteries of television. Basically, it's a short, curly mess. She looks like a Pantene-commercial "before." Anyway, when she sees C.J. get out of the car, she gets up and goes into the house, tapping Zoey on the shoulder as she goes. Mmm. Friendly.
Josh is in his office blowing his nose loudly when Margaret comes along and asks how he's feeling. He just gives her a look. Actually, why is Josh even here? He's not doing that much. He should be at home with some nice chicken soup with matzoh and some Archie comics. Margaret hands him a bunch of work, the last piece of which has something do with a complaint about "autos and flat glass." Josh energetically says, "Flat glass...excellent!" Margaret just looks at him like he announced he was a Scientologist. Josh explains, "It's a new thing I'm doing, kind of a positive-attitude thing." Margaret asks if he needs anything, since Donna's still helping Angela. He's stunned to learn Donna's in the budget negotiations. Margaret: "I guess." "Outstanding!" Josh ejaculates, freaking Margaret slightly. She leaves quickly.
Joe wanders over to Toby's office and closes the door behind him. He asks Toby how it's going; Toby thinks he's coming down with something. Joe: "I'm sorry." Toby: "You say that, but in a way that makes me wonder if you really are." Joe sits down and reminisces about Ashland: "I can still feel it, you know? The first time I got called into his office and yelled at about something he'd read in my Law Review note. He'd read my Law Review note." Joe immediately swore he'd never wash his ears again. "And all I could think was, this was the guy. He's why a cop has to read a criminal his rights. He's why a couple of mixed race can get married in the state of Texas. I spent three nights as a 1L trying to pick apart his Baines v. U.S. Steel. I couldn't do it." Toby's turn: "I was in a room with Ashland once. I was a student at City College. The Student Organizing Committee got him to give a speech on the history of voting rights. We were hanging from the rafters. I talked to him afterward. I mean, he wouldn't remember me, but I spent the six weeks organizing a voter-registration drive in Bed-Stuy and Bensonhurst. You know when you go out west, how they say, 'Don't miss the Grand Canyon -- it's one of the few things in life when you actually see it, it doesn't disappoint'? That's Roy Ashland." Joe confesses that he lied to Toby about Ashland last night; Ashland never said a word. Toby sighs: "I don't want to see him gone, Joe. I want nine Ashlands on the Court. I just...I just wish he was forty years younger."
C.J. -- in a sunporch that is to die for -- is preparing Zoey, while Abby listens. C.J. tells Zoey, "Diane likes to keep things warm, casual, but she'll try to zing you with some indirect attribution like 'People say,' or "There's a rumour that....'" Abby tells Zoey that in that case, she should call those sources "tweaky little ill-informed chicken-ass wannabes." No, Abby just says, "For example?" C.J.: "'There's a rumour that you're seeing a therapist.'" Abby quickly tells Zoey that she doesn't have to answer that. C.J. tells Zoey that if she doesn't answer, Diane will "just wait, like an infinitely forgiving, infinitely compassionate cross between the Virgin Mary and a schnauzer." Abby says it's nobody's business. Zoey tells her mother that she wants to answer the question: "'Yes, I'm seeing a therapist.'" Zoey elaborates that she had lots of support from friends and family, but that she couldn't deal with it on her own, so she needed help: "I've gotten some, and it's...you know...been good." C.J. supplies: "The help's helped." Zoey says she'll use that. Yeah, that's one snappy soundbite. C.J. moves on to the drug question as Abby looks pained and glances off at the other end of the porch.
Josh watches a bunch of suits march out, and ambles over to the Roosevelt Room to ask what's going on. Leo tells Josh that they had a bit of a breakdown. He's informed that the Republicans have decided that the cap-gains tax cut is non-negotiable, and that they want to make it even bigger. Angela tells Josh that they're going to have to have a Continuing Resolution until after Christmas. Josh: "You gotta be kidding. You let it drag on that long, they'll try to de-fund the yule log." Angela: "It gets better: they're not willing to continue funding at the current level. They want a 1% cut on everything but defense and Homeland Security." Josh: "How could this happen?" Leo cautions him, but Josh insists, "No, Leo, how is this acceptable? Haffley's not the Prime Minister. You take this to the President, you know what he'll say?" Leo: "He'll say yes." Josh: "How can you say that?" Leo: "To keep the lights on! To make sure a couple of million government employees keep getting paid. It's two more months." Josh: "This isn't governing. It's duck-and-cover." Leo: "He'll say that, too." Leo leaves, and then Angela gets up to put on her jacket. Josh says, "At least be...." Angela snaps: "What?" Josh: "I don't know...embarrassed." Donna says, "It wasn't her." Oh God. Please don't tell me Donna said something to screw things up. Josh asks, "What?" Donna says, "You know the hand she was dealt." Josh: "You saying it was me?" Donna replies, "No, I'm saying we may have won in a landslide, but we didn't take Congress with us. And now it looks like we're not taking the country with us, and the other guys know it." Josh looks pissed. And betrayed. Donna says she has to get back to work. She leaves, and Josh is silent for a moment before sneering, "It's nice when you make new friends." Oh, good. Passive-aggressive Josh, my favourite flavour. Angela says, "You know, all this time she's been fighting for you -- for you and your plan to send everyone to college." Josh says it's not a bad plan. Angela says that the Republicans didn't think so either: "I even think they wanted to go along with it. Run ads [that] they voted for it. But we'd have had to squeeze Medicaid, the EITC. Poor people paying for college kids and Wall Street? I don't think Jed Bartlet would sign off on that!" Josh has already walked out of the room, and Sam isn't around to remind her to call him "President Bartlet." Now she's talking to herself: "I got you 'til Christmas."
Joe comes back to Ashland's hospital room. This time, Ashland's awake, though very subdued: "Mr. Quincy...back to argue Mimoud...v. Transportation Security." Joe says, "Suspect class: strict scrutiny." Ashland reminds Joe that he works for the President now: "It'd be ex parte." Joe says he's glad to see Ashland doing better. Ashland: "This just a...social visit?" Joe admits it's not. Ashland knows that the President sent Joe. He says to Joe, "I think it's time we called each other by...our first names...Joe. Don't you?" Joe replies, "Yes, sir, Mr. Chief Justice." Ashland chortles weakly and pats Joe's arm. Joe smiles at him.
Toby appears in Leo's office which, for some reason, has lighting so very orange that Leo and Toby look like something sitting under the heat lamps at Burger King. Seriously, what the hell is going on with the lighting? Maybe Admiral Feelgood was handing out canthaxanthin pills. Toby just stands there while Leo shuffles papers. Leo finally looks up, and Toby asks, "Now what?" Leo tells him about the continuing resolution. Toby: "So now we won't have a budget until we're up against the State of the Union?" Leo asks if there's anything on Ashland. Toby says he's coming over to see the President. Leo: "When?" Toby: "Now." Leo can't believe it. Margaret tells Leo that POTUS is ready. Leo thinks that's great. As Leo heads into the Oval Office, Toby tells him, "I find your orangeyness both disturbing and strangely erotic." Well, I could be making that up. He actually says, "We gave away college tuition for nothing." Leo -- ever the half-full type -- tells Toby, "Good work on the Chief Justice."
Zoey's being interviewed. This whole interview storyline is actually pretty boring and pointless. It doesn't tell us much more about the kidnapping, or Zoey, and surely there must be some other way to dramatize Abby's estrangement from Jed. Zoey uses C.J.'s little "the help's helped" line. Whatever. Diane asks Zoey about what happened at the club with Tartuffe and the Ecstasy: "Now, he says...." Zoey says she knows what he says. Diane: "You sound angry." Except Zoey sounds about as angry as someone who's dropped a cornflake in her lap during breakfast. Zoey says, "I am angry. The only thing I can do, the only thing any of us can do, is tell the truth about what happened to us, and try to find a way to live with the shame...and self-doubt that comes from having trusted someone who then betrayed you." Is that a little shot at Abby? Diane asks if she has anything she would like to say to Jean Paul. Zoey: "Oh, no." Oh, please. You've got nothing to say to that little fuckwad? Abby can't take anymore and she leaves quietly. C.J. follows her. Abby asks, "How much longer?" C.J. says Diane will be wrapping up soon: "That was her big gun." Abby: "Thank you. She did well. You did an excellent job." C.J.: "You, too." Abby says that Zoey needed time up in New Hampshire. C.J.: "I meant, you've raised a remarkable young woman." Abby dismisses this: "Oh, she was always Jed's little girl." C.J.: "Mrs. Bartlet...may I say...we miss you...." Abby: "That's very kind. Please don't be offended if I say I don't miss you." C.J. laughs. Abby smiles a bit. C.J. talks about how busy things have been in the White House. Abby: "We get newspapers up here, C.J. You don't have to apologize for him not coming. I asked him not to." I wonder if she's retained the divorce lawyer yet.
Donna tells Josh, "They're here." Hang on, because there's a whole lot of ShakyCam from here on out. I guess tripods got cut in the first round of budget talks. Haffley and his posse march in, all tough and silent and intense. They walk past Will in the hall. Josh and Donna come over to Will, and Josh asks, "They all here?" Will says they are. Donna looks concerned. She sticks close to Josh, but he firmly says, "Go. Go."
Donna goes into the meeting. VPOTUS is there, and he shakes Haffley's hand, asking, "Who'da thought?" Leo comes over and tells them that Jed will be right in after he finishes his meeting. Senator Royce quietly asks about Ashland. Leo says that's the meeting POTUS is in. Royce is surprised: "He's in the White House?" Leo: "Came straight from his adjustable bed. The man's a force of nature." That's our Chief Justice: Roy "Craftmatic" Ashland. Everybody's fairly orange in this scene, too, though not as much as before.
Jed arrives and stands opposite the Speaker as everyone takes his or her place around the table. For some reason, everyone remains standing. Stephen Culp sure looks good for his age. He's supposedly forty-eight, but he looks about two-thirds of that. It kind of detracts from my buying him as the Speaker. Royce says he wants to thank Jed, saying, "None of us think this is a perfect deal. No one likes to see the sausage made, including the guys who make it." Man. Donna's here -- Josh isn't. How weird is that, people? Big changes afoot, I tell you. Royce blathers on with some conciliatory yatter, and Jed thanks him for saying it: "I think I had to make that little speech the last time around. Or maybe the time before." Everyone chuckles politely as they finally plant their asses. Jed says that this is the third continuing resolution, the third time coming up short: "We gotta do better. The people aren't paying us to duck the hard choices. You want to run through the details, Angela?" She proposes a continuing resolution extending no later than January 3, to include a reduction by 1%. Before she can say any more, Haffley interrupts her to say that he knows they talked about a 1% cut: "It's going to have to be three [percent]." I don't understand the choice to have a handheld camera for a scene in which everybody's hardly moving. Angela says that nothing like that was even mentioned; Jed tells her, "Hold on." Haffley "apologizes" for not giving more notice, but says that they just came from their conference, and that there was significant opposition to only a 1% cut. Jed says, "'Only' 1%? We had a deal at 1%." Haffley: "But now my members have to go back to their districts for the holidays [and] explain why we kept the gravy train running with a rising deficit and an economy crying out for tax relief. It's an economic situation that calls out for action -- not status-quo spending. Now, 3% may sound painful, but it's only for two months. It'll show we're serious." The lights dim again, or maybe the camera fades right down and then comes back up. Maybe it's just supposed to be a really arty cut, but it doesn't work. Jed calmly asks, "What's ?" Haffley: "Sir?" Jed: "In two months...5%? Fifty [percent]? How many rounds do we go, Jeff? I'm just asking." Haffley replies, "There is no ',' sir. I mean, not to get too technical, but this government runs out of money at midnight, and my guys have gone home. This is it." ShakyCam closeup shots of Jed and Haffley. Jed thinks for a while and then says, "No." Haffley says, "There is no altering this offer, Mr. President." Jed stands up, which means that everyone else has to (although Haffley's the last to his feet), and says, "And I said, 'no.'" Haffley -- looking a wee bit intimidated -- says, "Let's be clear, sir. We cannot...we will not vote to keep on footing the bill. You will be held responsible for shutting down the federal government." Jed nods: "Then shut it down." Then I'm not sure what happens, because I got a concussion from the heavy-handed Law & Order sound effects that go "Clang! Clang! Boom!" I've pieced it together, though: Lighting by The X_Files. Camera work by NYPD Blue. Sound effects by Peddinghaus.