West Wing TV Show - "A Medium-Sized Nightmare" - West Wing Photos & Videos, West Wing Reviews & West Wing Recaps | TWoP

When we left off, President Shepherd had just given the order to bomb Libyan Intelligence Headquarters. In the Oval Office, POTUS is meeting with Robin, A.J., Lewis, Leon, and some aides. Robin asks, "Sir, what do you think about a national address?" Shepherd: "The last thing I want to do is put the Libyans center stage." Leon thinks it's an excellent idea, especially since Rumson will be riding Shepherd for his lack of military service. POTUS doesn't like the idea that what he did tonight could be used for political gain. Leon persists: "But it can be, sir. What you did tonight was very presidential." POTUS, obviously distressed, says: "Leon, somewhere in Libya right now a janitor's working the night shift at the Libyan Intelligence Headquarters. He's going about doing his job 'cause he has no idea in about an hour he's gonna die in a massive explosion. He's just going about his job 'cause he has no idea that about an hour ago I gave an order to have him killed. You've just seen me do the least presidential thing I do." POTUS is in the Briefing Room fielding questions. In response to a question, he explains why there's no way the C-STAD weapons system could have been mistaken by Libyan Intelligence as offensive rather than defensive. Another reporter asks POTUS whether it's true that he was with Sydney Wade when he learned of the attack. A.J. tells Robin, "Get him off." POTUS says, "Yes, we'd just finished dinner." Robin firmly says, "Last question." Another reporter asks POTUS to comment on the status of his relationship with Sydney. POTUS replies, "We don't have a relationship. We just had dinner." Another one asks, "Can you tell us if she spent the night at the White House or..." POTUS says, "Folks, a lot of people were killed last night. Let's try to keep our eye on the ball, okay? Thank you." As Shepherd leaves, ignoring the reporters trying to get his attention, Robin apologizes for not prepping him for that. Shepherd says, "There's nothing that needs prepping. A.J., let's meet with the leadership after we meet with the Security Council." Robin tells Shepherd that Newsweek is begging for ten minutes today. He says, "Nobody gets ten minutes today." POTUS is in his private office, talking to Lewis on the phone. He asks Lewis to tell the speaker to wait because he wants to talk to him. On a television, Bob Rumson is saying, "Last night, the cost of his liberal programs was raised to include the blood of twenty-two American soldiers. Now, Mr. Shepherd's read a lot of books, but it doesn't take a Harvard degree to see this comin' a mile down the road." POTUS tells the TV, "I went to Stanford, you blowhole." Rumson continues, "The fact that our Commander-in-Chief has not served one day in uniform..." POTUS turns the TV off. Sydney's sister Beth is helping her move into her new place. Sydney's unpacking stuff and ignoring Beth's query about where a certain box goes. She asks Beth, "Why did I have to kiss him?" Beth is surprised; Sydney hadn't told her. Beth asks, "Where?" Sydney: "On the mouth." Beth replies, "Where in the White House?" Sydney tells her it was the Dish Room. Well, the China Room. Beth asks what happened after that. Sydney: "He had to go and attack Libya." Beth: "It's always something." Sydney states, with great aggravation, "I gotta nip this in the bud. This has catastrophe written all over it." Beth responds, "In what language? Sydney, the man is the leader of the free world. He's brilliant, he's funny, he's handsome, he's an above-average dancer. Isn't it possible our standards are just a tad high?" That's one of my favourite lines from this movie. The phone rings; Sydney ignores it, knowing it's the Prez. She and Beth argue about whether she should answer it. Sydney finally answers, telling Beth, "I'm gonna end it on the phone. I'm not gonna go over there." Naturally, the shot is Shepherd opening his door to find Sydney standing there with a Secret Service agent. She states, "I just came over here to tell you why I can't see you anymore." Shepherd dismisses the agent and closes the door, offers Sydney a drink, and tries to take her coat. Sydney: "Mr. President, this isn't gonna work." Shepherd: "Sure it will. You button the top button, it won't fall off the hanger..." POTUS is quite the wit. She tells him it's been fun and all, but "this has catastrophe written all over it." She asks him not to pursue her outside of the political arena. He responds, "Well, I have no intention of pursuing you inside the political arena, and that leaves everything out, and that's unacceptable to me." She's worried that he's leaving himself open to character attacks in an election year, and indicates that if she were on his staff she would tell him so. He seems pretty unconcerned, plops himself on the couch, and then wonders why she's not on his staff. Sydney says, "You can't afford me." Shepherd: "How much do you make?" Sydney: "More than you do, Mr. President." Right on. Shepherd: "The name is Andy. How much money do you make?" She snaps, "What the hell does it matter how much money I make?" Shepherd pulls rank: "You would raise your voice to the President?" She says she's only worried about his administration. Shepherd asks, "Are you attracted to me?" This flusters Sydney slightly, and she tells him that's not the issue. Not surprisingly, he wants to make it the issue: "Let's try something new, 'cause I know that most couples, when they're first getting together, are inclined to slam on the brakes because they're concerned about Bob Rumson's drool." Um, thanks for loading me up with that image. He goes on to tell her that her problem is "sex and nervousness." She incredulously repeats this. He elaborates, "Yes. Last night when we were looking at the different place settings in the dish room, I realized those place settings were provided by the First Ladies. And I'll bet none of those First Ladies were nervous about having sex with their President husbands. And you know why?" She doesn't; he explains, "Because they weren't presidents when they first met them. That's not the case here." Sydney sighs and seems much happier. She asks to use the bathroom to freshen up. Shepherd directs her, "As you pass through, you'll see a large closet on your left. And if you feel comfortable, hang up your coat, and when you come back I'll have fixed us a drink, we'll sit on the couch, and I will explain to you my plan." ["Oddly Ainsleyan syntax, there." -- Wing Chun] Sydney calls from offscreen, "You have a plan? Don't make me wait. You're on a roll." As Shepherd mixes some drinks, he says, "Okay. You're attracted to me, but the idea of physical intimacy is uncomfortable because you only know me as the President. But it's not always gonna be that way, and the reason I know that is that there was a moment last night when you were with me and not the President, and I know what a big step that was for you. So, Sydney, I'm in no rush. Here's my plan: we're gonna slow down. When you're comfortable, that's when it'll happen." Sydney returns, wearing one of Andy's white dress shirts, a serious, blasé look, and nothing else. He gets a load of this and says, "Perhaps I didn't properly explain the fundamentals of the 'Slow Down' plan." She pats and tests the mattress with her hand, saying, "No, you explained it great." Shepherd asks whether Sydney's nervous. She says she isn't. He replies, "Good. My nervousness exists on several levels. Number one -- and this is in no particular order -- I haven't done this in a pretty long time. Number two: any expectations that you might have, due to the fact that I'm, you know..." Sydney: "The most powerful man in the world?" He rabbits on nervously -- something about Eisenhower -- and she finally plants one on him. At a political rally, Bob Rumson is bellowing, "Does New Hampshire want traditional American values back in the White House?" The crowd cheers and hollers yes. He keeps on in that vein, getting them riled up and finally announcing, "My name is Bob Rumson. And I'm running for President!" Geez, how long did it take to come up with that slogan? The evidently not very demanding crowd goes wild. Back at the White House, it's before dawn. Shepherd's bedroom phone rings; he answers it. It's Lewis. "Lewis, it is 5:00 AM. You gotta get yourself a life, man." Shepherd agrees to something, hangs up, and turns over to look at Sydney. But she's not in bed; she's sitting on the couch putting her shoes on. She explains that she wanted to leave the building before the press corps arrived. Shepherd replies, "I have those same thoughts every day of my life. Say, you know Lewis Rothschild, don't you? Well, he's..." Sydney says, "Sure. Boy, Lewis'd go nuts if he knew I'd spent the night." Andy tells her Lewis is on his way up. Someone knocks on the door. Before Sydney can even take this in, POTUS has told Lewis to come in. Lewis greets them both. POTUS is wearing a t-shirt and boxer shorts. It's pretty obvious what has transpired, but Sydney makes a feeble attempt to cover anyway: "Well, Mr. President, thank you for taking the time to go over those fossil fuel numbers. I'll just get my coat, and be on my way." Nobody's fooled. Shepherd asks Lewis, "What's the situation?" Lewis states, "Camped out at every exit." Sydney seems pretty surprised to learn that the press is there. Lewis tells her she should have taken a cab. Sydney is surprised to learn that the press have bothered to note the make, model, and license number of her vehicle. Pretty naïve for a professional political operative. Robin arrives, greets everyone, and says, "I think the important thing is not to make it look like we're panicking." POTUS replies, "See, and I think the important thing is actually not to be panicking." A.J. arrives . Lewis is wondering how to get Sydney out of the building and what to say to the press; Robin suggests a diversion, by which she does not mean setting the White House on fire. Shepherd sarcastically agrees with torching the joint. Lewis announces, "Can I state very clearly that I can't be party to anything illegal?" Buddy, I think you're in the wrong profession. A.J.: "Good for you, Lewis." Lewis's rejoinder: "Say what you want -- it's always the guy in my job that ends up doing eighteen months in Danbury Minimum Security Prison." POTUS tells Lewis to simmer down, and that they're not going with Plan A: Create a Diversion. He tells Sydney that they'll have someone take her home. A.J. says his wife is in his office and can do it. Lewis thinks that's fine, and wants to settle the press statement. Andy tells Sydney, "Sydney, when you leave here, you're gonna run into reporters and photographers. They're gonna take your picture every day. They're gonna ask you questions every day. Answer them, don't answer them -- it's entirely up to you. The White House has no official position except to say 'no comment.'" Robin is all, "'No comment'?" POTUS states, "The White House does not comment on the President's personal life." Lewis argues that they can't leave it at that. Shepherd: "Well, I tell you what, Lewis: we just did." Lewis tries to argue, but A.J. ends the meeting and hustles Robin and Lewis out, telling Sydney, "Esther will be in my office. You take your time." When everyone's gone, Andy apologizes for how all this went, and promises, "We'll do it better time." Sydney sweetly says, "Well, I'm no expert, but I thought we did it pretty good this time." They part, smooching a couple of times. He promises to call her from Panama. Once she leaves, he tells himself, "All right. Okay. This is good." Back at the GDC offices, we can see when someone rips another sheet off the counters that they need fourteen votes in fifty-one days. Sydney is musing about an incentive program. We hear a voice-over saying, "Sydney Ellen Wade, the political strategist who accompanied President Shepherd to last week's state dinner, reportedly spent the night at the White House as a guest of the President." Over a shot of Sydney and Andy having dinner together, another reporter says, "The President returned from Panama this evening after a three-day tour through Central America. His first order of business: an intimate dinner with Sydney Wade at a romantic Georgetown bistro." Outside the bistro, there's a gaggle of photographers and reporters jockeying for space and snapping pictures through the windows of the restaurant. A third reporter's voice-over: "Conservative and religious family organizations are starting to smell blood in the water as the polling numbers of the President are dropping." Shot of Leon with his staff in the White House's vote-getting war room. Shot of Robin at the podium in the Briefing Room. A fourth reporter's voice: "And Showbiz Weekly was in Hollywood for the star-studded gala. Also on tonight's program: Day Fifteen of the Sydney Watch. Is the world's most eligible bachelor off the market?" We see a shot of Sydney being badgered as she leaves her office. voice-over: "All right, caller: you're on the air." Someone with a twangy accent asks, "Dan, what about Lucy Shepherd? Is anyone concerned about this little girl? Can we now finally have a serious debate about family values?" Yeah, it's too bad the President has taken up trafficking child prostitutes in Thailand. The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket. We see shot of Lucy playing her trombone for Dad and Sydney. Over a shot of Bob Rumson bloviating to an outdoors crowd, we hear a news-anchor type say, "Political polling analyst Ed Earl, with the President's job approval taking an eight-point dip from his personal best of 63% three weeks ago, should the White House be concerned that the 'girlfriend factor' has left Shepherd vulnerable to the kinds of character questions he was able to avoid three years ago?" Ed Earl replies, "Well, if they're not concerned, they sure oughta be." News Anchor Guy continues, "Columnist Cynthia Schuyler, how much will this new wrinkle affect his ability to put together a win on his crime bill?" We get a shot of Sydney leaving her apartment building, running the gauntlet of reporters and photographers to get to her car. Another voice-over: "We're going to take a commercial break. When we come back, we're going to meet a junior high school classmate of Sydney Wade's, who has some intimate details to share." There's a shot of a hotel at night. It's snowing. Inside, Bob Rumson's in a suite with a bunch of other people. He's on the phone, saying, "Well, I agree 110%, Mrs. Harper. That's why I'm up here in the dead of winter talkin' about it with you folks." He laughs and tells her she's very generous, and that he'll be taking that money off her hands right now. He hangs up as a guy enters the room carrying a manila envelope. Rumson asks, "Whaddya got?" Envelope guy announces, "Call me Santa Claus, Senator. She's got an FBI file." Rumson, disgusted: "Oh, shit, Stu, my mother's got an FBI file." Stu, still smug: "Yeah, but...I got art." Rumson looks at the picture. Stu continues, "It's a demonstration outside the Department of Commerce. The picture's old, and some of the faces are obscured by the fire, but that's a burning flag, and that's Sydney Ellen Wade right there in front." It is indeed; she looks young and earnest and has long curly hair instead of her kicky little professional haircut. Rumson sings, "It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas...." At the GDC, Sydney's on the phone: "Think like a father for a second. Wouldn't you like your kids to be able to take a deep breath when they're thirty?" He seems to acquiesce and she thanks him and tells him he's doing the right thing. Sydney announces they can update the tote board, which then indicates they need ten votes in forty-two days. Everyone cheers. Sydney's assistant David sits down and says, "Hey Syd, I saw on your schedule you're gonna meet with McSorley, McCluskey, and Shane." Sydney replies, "Yeah, the Motown Three said they'd give me thirty minutes week." She's aware that it's a long shot, but she thinks it's worth the effort. David suggests that they should do some prep work, and asks whether she wants to order in. Sydney explains she can't, since she's having dinner at the White House. She suggests starting early tomorrow. David replies, "Okay. I'm having lunch at the Kremlin, so we'll have to, you know, start even earlier than that..." Sydney leaves, as David continues, "in order for me to catch the morning plane to Moscow." At the White House, the President's motorcade is waiting for the Prez in the pouring rain. In the Oval Office, Shepherd on the phone, and he doesn't seem happy: "Douglas, does the NRA have videotapes of you playing golf with Satan? We've already softened the assault weapons. We're leaving the SKS, the Mini-14, and about two hundred and fifty other types on the street. I mean, how much pull can one lobby have?" Janie is bustling about with her coat on, gesturing to her watch to hustle POTUS along. He ends his call, saying he's late for a party fundraiser. He hangs up. Janie nags him about being late. A.J. hustles in, saying, "I just got off the phone with the Federal Mediator in St. Louis. Management just walked away from the table. The baggage handlers, pilots, and flight attendants are all getting set to walk in forty-eight hours." As POTUS puts his coat on, he tells A.J. "I studied under a Nobel Prize-winning economist." Dr. Josiah Bartlet, I presume? He asks A.J., "You know what he taught me?" A.J. replies, "Never have a airline strike at Christmas?" Shepherd: "Yeah. I'm going to St. Louis." A.J. suggests Shepherd can leave straight from the fundraiser. As Janie and the Prez reach his limo, Robin and Lewis rush up and ask for a moment. Janie tells them that POTUS is running incredibly late. Shepherd tells them, "Hop in. We'll talk in the car." Inside, Lewis says, "We have a small problem." Robin tells Lewis: "It could've been a small problem. It's now at the very least a medium-sized nightmare." Lewis states: "Robin sees it as a problem. I see it as a opportunity." Robin continues fretting, "It could've been an opportunity if we'd caught it... " Lewis says they did catch it She snaps, "At 5:45! Five-forty-five doesn't do me any good, Lewis. Five-forty-five, network news is in makeup." Lewis starts bitching at her about how many employees she has working for her when Shepherd wearily interrupts, "Guys, do I have to be here for this meeting?" Finally the story emerges: the third story in the evening news is that Sydney was at a rally at which protesters burned a flag. Shepherd, a little alarmed: "Today?" No, it was about thirteen years ago. Robin elaborates: "In front of the Department of Commerce. Anti-apartheid." POTUS recaps: "Let me see if I've got this: the third story on the news tonight was that someone I didn't know thirteen years ago, when I wasn't President, participated in a demonstration where no laws were being broken in protest of something that so many people were against it doesn't exist anymore?" He pauses. "Just out of curiosity, what was the fourth story?" He tells them not to deal with it, and that "they're trying to get us to swing at a pitch in the dirt. No one ever wins these fights. It'll go away." Lewis and Robin don't seem convinced. Shepherd suddenly remembers he was supposed to have dinner with Sydney tonight. We cut to Sydney's apartment, where she's holding up a black velvet dress in front of herself and admiring how it looks in a full-length mirror. She tells Beth, who's sitting on her bed, that she loves it. She says she always wears suits when she has dinner at the White House and thought it would be nice to dress up. As Beth encourages Sydney to try it on, the phone rings. Sydney answers it and tells Andy, "Just trying on dresses." On the cell phone from the limo, the Prez tells her he's going to have to bail on their date. Sydney jokes, "Another woman?" He explains about trying to avert the airline strike in St. Louis. Sydney, cheerfully: "Boy, if I had a nickel for every time I heard that one!" He thanks her for being so understanding and promises to call later. As he hangs up, he says, "Boy, I hate doing that. She was trying on dresses." Lewis says, "I tell any girl I'm going out with to assume that all plans are soft until she receives confirmation from me thirty minutes beforehand." Robin: "And they find this romantic?" Lewis claims he says it with a great deal of charm. No doubt. Suddenly POTUS gets excited about something he sees out the window. "Look! Look! There it is! Carmen's House of Flowers! Hey, Coop, we gotta stop." He wants to get Sydney some flowers. Robin and Lewis are puzzled. POTUS explains to the youngsters that that's what men do when they break a date. Robin authoritatively states, "That's not what men do. I know no men who do that." (Can't you just hear C.J. delivering that line, too?) POTUS tells Agent Cooper that he's going to hop out at the flower shop. Agent Cooper is hesitant. Lewis says that the President is not hopping out and that Lewis will get the flowers on POTUS's behalf. POTUS objects that it wouldn't be personal. Lewis advises a security sweep: "We don't know who's in there." POTUS wonders, "You think there's a florist in there planning an assassination on the off-chance that I might be stopping by?" Lewis does, in fact, think it's possible. The shot is POTUS busting into the shop and trying to get the attention of the clerk, who's on the phone chatting with a friend. She says she'll be right with him and turns back to her call. POTUS says, "Hey, I don't know if you're the one I talked to on the phone...Virginia, dogwood, the President...does any of this ring a bell....?" The clerk faints onto the floor. Which I find just a bit much, but whatever. He says, "Same girl. She remembered me." At some big political soirée, Bob Rumson is once again at a podium, in front of an American flag even larger than his mouth and ego combined. He states to the huge, enthusiastic crowd: "I'm glad to see that the President has a girlfriend! Never mind she's the hired gun of an ultra-liberal political action committee. Never mind that the President takes the Fifth anytime a reporter has the temerity to ask him a question about a woman in a position to exert enormous influence over a huge range of issues. Never mind that this woman's idea of how to unwind at the end of a tough day is to get together with her ACLU pals and set American flags on fire!" Watching this elsewhere on television, Robin says to herself, and more or less to Lewis, "No reaction from the White House." They appear to be in a lavish hotel suite. Shepherd's on the phone telling Sydney that there's no need to dignify any of this with a response. Sydney wonders what Lewis and Robin think. He says, "Brutus and Cassius? They want me to get into a character debate and mix it up." Sydney tells him that Lewis and Robin are very smart. Shepherd tells Robin and Lewis, "Sydney says you guys are really stupid." She of course shouts that she never did. To Brutus and Cassius, he adds, "She's questioning your loyalty." Lewis cracks, "Hell, I question it all the time." With his eyes on the TV, the Prez announces, "Wait a second, here comes my favorite part." Rumson says, "My name is Bob Rumson, and I'm running for President." Shepherd tells Sydney, "Sure glad he cleared that up, because that crowd was getting ready to buy some Amway products." Sydney and Shepherd talk about polling numbers for a moment, and then he asks her what she's doing this weekend. She says she was going to bring some work home. He seems to have gotten the strike threat under control and Lucy's going to be away for the weekend, so he suggests they throw a key party and invite all the swingingest politicos in Washington. No, of course he doesn't. He invites her to Camp David for the weekend. Naturally, she accepts. shot is a helicopter landing in a snowy clearing in a wooded area. Then we cut to Shepherd and Sydney on the couch later that evening, in front of a lovely fire. She's looking at his college transcripts. You know, I'm a bigger nerd than most people, and I wasn't too bad a student, but even I have not resorted to showing anybody my report cards or transcripts to try to impress him or her. I mean, Jesus, he's already the President of the United States. What else does he have to prove? She says, "This isn't human. Nobody gets this many 'A's. You were like a Stepford student." Shepherd asks, flipping around the TV channels, "Are you still reading that ridiculous biography?" Oh, all right then. It's a book. At least he's not trotting out his actual transcripts. Sydney says, "No, no, I finished Andrew Shepherd: Road to the White House. Now I'm onto Shepherd: The Early Years." Shepherd complains, "Seven trillion dollar communications system at my disposal, you'd think I'd be able to find out if the Packers won." Sydney, "Oh, Andy...C-minus in Women's Studies?" He replies, "Yeah...that course wasn't about what I thought it was gonna be about." Shepherd's finally found some news; the anchor says, "President Shepherd was in Maryland this week for his routine physical exam. Doctors at Bethesda Naval Hospital pronounced the President in excellent health." Andy: "Who cares? Just give us the scores!" Another news anchor on another channel reads this little item: "While the President spent the day at Camp David, GOP presidential hopeful Robert Rumson continued his attacks on President Shepherd's character. During the Saturday morning news program Capitol Review with Kenneth Michaels, Senator Rumson suggested that GDC political director Sydney Ellen Wade, whose close personal relationship with the President has been causing the White House headaches over the past two months, may have traded sexual favors for key votes in the Virginia State Legislature while lobbying for the Virginia Teachers Association." Well, what a creep. And what a tired, typical way to try to discredit a successful woman. Sydney and Andy both sit up with their mouths hanging open. The news show cuts to a clip of Rumson and presumably Michaels on the aforementioned show. Michaels is telling Rumson he's making a heck of an accusation about Sydney. Rumson says, "Let me be very clear. I am not making an accusation. I am saying when you hear one thing, you dismiss it. You hear two, you dismiss it. But when several, several well-respected members and former members of the Virginia State House..." Michaels asks for names. Sydney dejectedly says, "My God. He's making this up as he goes along." Shepherd says, "I'm so sorry about this, Sydney." On TV, Rumson is yattering on: "I don't even know what we call her...is she the First Mistress?" Oh, give me a huge freaking break. Sydney, with mild dismay: "Oh, man. My father heard that." Andy turns off the boob tube and advises her to tell him to turn a deaf ear. Sydney responds, "Yeah, well, my father doesn't have a deaf ear. He hears fine out of both. So do I. And so does my sister, so do my friends. You're the only one who seems to..." Andy says, "I can't challenge the school bully to a fight just because he picked on my girlfriend." Sydney says she can take care of herself, but wonders, "How can you keep quiet? How do you have patience for people who claim they love America but clearly can't stand Americans?" Clearly and firmly, Shepherd replies, "I have one more election left. I don't have the luxury of losing my patience." Sydney hesitates slightly and then says, "I want to say something, but I'm gonna fumble it a little bit, so I'd just like you to wait till I'm done before you respond. I'm in love with you. I'm certain of it. And I want to be with you more than anything. But maybe things would be better for you if I just disappeared for a while." He promises things will be better when he passes a crime bill, adding, "And if you disappeared, I'd find you." They hug. We hear Christmas music ("God Rest Ye Merry, Gentlemen") and see a shot of a party going on through one of the windows of the White House. Some guy is telling POTUS, "Mr. President, militant women are out to destroy college football in this country." I know that's my #1 priority. Shepherd says in a polite but non-committal way, "Is that a fact?" The paranoid male chauvinist pig yammers on, "Yes, sir. Have you been following this situation down in Atlanta? These women want parity for girls' softball, volleyball, field hockey..." Ye gads. Alert FEMA. POTUS: "If I'm not mistaken, Gil, I think the courts ruled on Title IX about twenty years ago." Gil: "Yes, sir, but what I'm saying now is that these women want that law enforced." POTUS declares, "It's a world gone mad, Gil." He sees an opportunity to foist Gil off on A.J. and makes his escape. Around a big tureen of egg nog, Leon tells Robin and Lewis, "You see, the country has mood swings." Lewis: "Mood swings? Nineteen post-graduate degrees in mathematics and your best explanation for going from a 63 to a 46% approval rating in five weeks is mood swings?" Leon says, "Well, I could explain it better, but I'd need charts and graphs and an easel." Robin suggests, "Fellas, we haven't slept in three years. Can't we forget work for one night and take this moment to enjoy each other as friends? It's Christmas." Lewis, deadpan: "It's Christmas?" Leon: "Yeah. You didn't get the memo?" Sydney arrives at the party and is greeted by Esther and A.J. She explains that she got stuck in traffic and got cut off by some idiot taxi driver. Andy wanders up, asking, "Did you get stuck on Dupont Circle again?' Everyone laughs. Sydney: "It's not funny. I hate that place. Can't you declare it a Federal Disaster Area or something?" He promises to look into it. She says she had a terrible meeting with McSorley, McCluskey, and Shane. "I totally lost my cool." She pitched them the bill. A.J.: "On its merits?" Shepherd, proudly: "The woman has no fear. She'd lobby the Carolinas to the American Lung Association." She's oblivious to the praise, saying, "It was a disaster." A.J. says that they told him a week ago that there was nothing on the President's domestic agenda they were more committed to defeating than the crime bill. Sydney responds, "Well, congratulations, fellas, you're outta the cellar. McSorley told me the only thing on the President's domestic agenda that they were more committed to defeating than the crime bill was the fossil fuel package." POTUS and A.J. seem surprised; A.J. asks, "You're kidding, aren't you?" He's got a fake smile plastered on his face. She says she's not kidding: "It's funny that he used the same words." Shepherd, distractedly: "Yeah, the Pep Boys don't know too many words." Sydney says she's going to get a drink and come back with some Christmas spirit. Sydney notices that Shepherd's mind seems to be elsewhere, and asks whether he's okay. He shrugs it off, and she goes with Esther to get a drink. A.J. quietly asks, "Did what I think just happened just happen? Did the GDC's political director just tell the President and the White House Chief of Staff that there are three votes on the crime bill that can be bought by sticking the fossil fuel package in a drawer?" Shepherd replies, "No, the GDC's political director didn't tell us anything. Sydney Wade told her boyfriend and her boyfriend's best friend that she had a lousy day." A.J. insists, "It doesn't change the facts, Mr. President. If Sydney gets her twenty-four votes and we're three short, there's some manoeuvering to be done." Shepherd says he made a promise. A.J. says he made a deal. (This is all sounding very familiar.) Shepherd says he made the deal with Sydney; A.J. argues that he made it with the GDC. POTUS says, "Yeah, well, this is all academic anyway. We're not going to need those three votes." A.J. warns, "If your approval rating continues to drop, things are gonna get tight." Lewis is talking to someone in a crowded bar. The guy is slurping olives off a swizzle stick (or whatever it is they skewer olives with in drinks). Hey, it's Aaron Sorkin playing the role of "Aide in Bar." I totally didn't recognize him at first, despite his seeming vaguely familiar; with his hair all slicked back and glasses on, he reminds me slightly of David Cronenberg for some bizarre reason. Lewis tells him, "I'm hearing rumors that your boss is wavering on the crime bill." AIB tells him you can't believe rumours. Lewis said that was what he wanted to hear. AIB says, "I'll tell you, though. My boss is starting to waver on the crime bill." Lewis looks concerned. In a restaurant, Sydney's having a meal with some suit who tells her, "Sydney, everybody cares about the environment during a phone survey. On Election Day, nobody gives a damn. That's, uh, that's why you have a job." Sydney firmly replies, "Congressman Pennybaker, on Election Day, people give a damn about what I tell them to give a damn about. That's why I have a job." At the GDC, David puts down the phone and triumphantly says, "She got Pennybaker!" The tote board is changed to read four votes in fourteen days. Cut to Lewis lobbying some old politician, who tells him, "Hey, look, I like your boy. Always have. But for God's sake, kid, does the woman have to spend the night?" Back at the GDC: Sydney's on the horn saying, "We've got the full backing of the White House, Katherine. Yes, at 20%. Three more votes and the President sends it to the Hill. Katie, Katie, ten years from now any cars with an internal combustion engine is gonna be considered a collector's item. Come on board -- we'll make your Volvo a classic." Cut to Leon and Lewis in the Roosevelt Room (I think), meeting with some more suits. Lewis says, "Congressman, the assault weapons are gone." Leon adds, "The bill is priced to move." The Congressman replies, "The bill isn't the issue. I'm facing a serious challenge in November, and the President's coattails just aren't what they used to be." Leon insists, "The President's coattails are gonna have room for you, Congressman; you just leave that to us." His aide says, "We left that to you, Leon, and the President's in a free-fall." Leon starts to argue, but the Congressman interrupts to say, "I just can't give you my vote." Cut to the Oval Office, where Leon and Lewis are lobbying A.J.: "The well is drying up. Now the President's gotta make a move or we're gonna die fast and quiet." Leon offers, "What if I do a new poll? We give him detailed public opinion." A.J. stares out the window. Lewis suggests including Sydney in the new model. A.J. stares at Lewis, who continues, "A.J., it's meaningless unless we ask them about Sydney." A.J. tells Lewis to do it. Outside Sydney's apartment at night, there's the usual swarm of reporters and security. Inside, Sydney and Andy are eating dinner. He pronounces it delicious and asks whether there's more. She says she didn't think he liked it. He did, but admits it's not for him: it's for the agent who checked the food for him. Andy said he'd bring him some if he could. Sydney challenges, "You didn't like it." He claims he loved it. She accuses him of lying and says she can tell when he's not being completely forthcoming: "You do a thing with your face." He wants to know when she's ever see him do a thing with his face. She says it was two days before they met: "You gave a speech for the Daughters of the American Revolution. I was there." He only vaguely remembers the speech. Sydney reminds him: "'Americans can no longer afford to pretend that they live in a great society.'" Now he remembers. Sydney asks, "There was supposed to be something after that, wasn't there?" Andy: "How did you know that?" Sydney says, "I told you. The face." She pours him a drink, and they clink their glasses. After tasting the alcohol, he says, "Oh, wow...what's the occasion?" She proudly says, "You're looking at a lady who's two votes shy of the promised land." Andy's surprised. She says she got Pennybaker, which got her Cass and Zimmer. Andy says that's great. Sydney says she knows she's not there yet, but he tells her she has every reason to be proud of herself. She replies, "I'll be proud when I see you sign the bill." He makes his weird face. She calls him on it. At the White House, Robin comes up to Leon and asks, "How're the numbers?" He says they're bad. She wants to know how bad. He replies, "Forty-one. Character, across the board." Lewis is yelling at someone named George on the phone in the background. Robin wonders who Lewis is talking to; Leon says, "Jarrett. He's trying to keep his fingers in the dam." Lewis snarls, "You're supposed to be a United States Congressman, for the love of Christ!" He pauses. "But we're not gonna stay at forty-one. The numbers are gonna go back up." He keep struggling to get a word in and make his point, but the Congressman isn't interested. Lewis finally says, "All right, George, can I tell you something? We're gonna win this thing. We're gonna get the votes we need and we're gonna win this thing. And you know what I'm going to do after that -- I mean that very night -- I'm gonna go to Sam & Harry's, I'm gonna order a big steak, and I'm gonna make a list of everybody who tried to fuck us this week!" He bangs the desk. Robin hisses at him "Lewis!" Lewis isn't finished, "Yeah, well, just vote your conscience, you chicken-shit lame-ass!" Yikes. He slams the phone down and tells Robin and Leon: "We lost Jarrett." Leon calmly says, "I hope so. 'Cause, you know, if that was an 'undecided,' then we need to work on our people skills." Lewis is on the horn again, telling someone named Karen to find Congressman Quincy for him right away. Daytime shot of the White House. It's raining. In the Oval Office, A.J. is telling POTUS that they lost Quincy, too. When POTUS asks whether there's a reason, Lewis explains, "Yeah, he thinks your numbers aren't likely to rebound." Leon says they're three votes down again. He pauses and then makes his pitch: "Mr. President, as of this morning, Sydney only needed one more vote. The Motown Three have gotta be scared blind. I don't think there'll be a better opportunity." Robin reminds him that the press is expecting an announcement on the crime bill by the State of the Union. Leon points out, "And if you agree to stick 455 in a drawer until after the elections, they'll give you the three votes." Robin adds, "And we declare victory, sir." Shepherd seems unconvinced: "We said as a last resort." Leon says, "We're there, sir. The State of the Union is forty-eight hours away." POTUS angrily resists: "Oh, come on, Leon! There's gotta be three votes someplace!" Leon insists that there aren't. POTUS, up in Leon's face: "Bullshit! There's gotta be somebody out there..." Leon doesn't back down; POTUS suggests Storch. Leon tells him Storch is a "no." POTUS: "Wagner!" Leon: "No." POTUS runs through a couple more names (Sobel and Clark). POTUS clarifies, "Not that Clark; the one from Indiana." He's a "no" too. A.J. says, "Mr. President, I think we have to do this." POTUS is vehement: "She is one vote away, A.J. It's important legislation that for the first time has a legitimate chance. She deserves every opportunity to..." Lewis interjects, "'She'? You meant 'it,' didn't you, sir? You meant the 'important legislation deserves every opportunity.'" A.J. tells Lewis to shut his cakehole. POTUS: "You have something to say to me, Lewis?" Lewis replies, "Respectfully, sir, I think we should examine the new poll for something more than its value as a box score!" Shepherd counters, "Examine what? They don't like that I'm going out with Sydney!" Lewis: "It's not that simple, sir. I think that this poll helps bring a murky problem into specific relief." Shepherd, furiously: "Whose problem we talking about, Lewis? Yours? You worried about losing your job? Because this poll isn't talking about my Presidency! This poll is talking about my life!" He slams the papers down on the desk. "Two hundred and sixty-four million people..." Lewis shouts back: "Mr. President, two hundred and sixty- four million people don't give a damn about your life! They give a damn about their own!" Holy mackerel, I need a macro for italic tags. A.J. says, "All right, that's enough!" Lewis says more calmly, "Mr. President, you've raised a daughter almost entirely on your own, and she's terrific. What does it say to you that in the last seven weeks, 59% of this country has begun to question your family values?" Well, I don't know about anyone else, but to me it says that 59% of the country has its head up its ass. A.J.: "The President doesn't answer to you, Lewis." Lewis gets in A.J.'s face: "Oh yes, he does, A.J. I'm a citizen, this is my President, and in this country it is not only permissible to question our leaders, it is our responsibility. But you already know that, don't you, Mr. President? Because you have a deeper love of this country than any man I've ever known, and I want to know what it says to you that in the past seven weeks 59% of Americans have begun to question your patriotism?" Shepherd: "Look, if people want to listen to Bob Rumson..." Lewis explodes again: "They don't have a choice! Rob Rumson is the only one doing the talking! People want leadership. And in the absence of genuine leadership, they will listen to anyone who steps up to the microphone. They want leadership. They're so thirsty for it, they'll crawl through the desert toward a mirage, and when they discover there's no water, they'll drink the sand." Shepherd evenly replies, "Lewis, we have had Presidents who were beloved, who couldn't find a coherent sentence with two hands and a flashlight. People don't drink the sand because they're thirsty, Lewis. They drink the sand because they don't know the difference." Everyone is quiet as they take this in. A.J. asks, "Mr. President, what do you want to do about 455?" Shepherd simply states, "Make the deal." At the GDC, it's party time. Champagne is being poured into coffee mugs. The tote board proclaims zero votes in one day. Susan tells Sydney, "I want to go on the record and apologize for my attitude toward you since your arrival." Clearly she's had plenty to drink, if she's apologizing. Sydney plays sweet and dumb, claiming not to have noticed. Susan confides, "I think I have a lot of pent-up hostility. And I'm wondering who I can blame it on." Sydney's not too sure about this conversation but Susan blathers on, "'Cause I've been blaming it on my mother and my ex-husband, and, well, that doesn't seem to be working..." David tells Sydney that Leo needs to see her. Sydney says, "Tell him to get in here. It's a party." David insists that Leo needs to see her in his office; he just got off the phone with MacInerney: "There's been a development." Sydney looks puzzled, and heads for Leo's office. POTUS walks upstairs to the Residence; we can hear Lucy practicing her trombone in the background. He sticks his head in her room and tells her it sounds good. She asks him whether he and Sydney had a fight. He's confused. Lucy says Sydney seemed pretty mad, and that she's waiting for him in his room. Shepherd tells her not to worry about it. Lucy asks, "Were you a dork?" "Dork" doesn't really begin to cover it. He leaves, telling her "Practise your music." Lucy calls out after him, "You know, if you were a dork, you should say you're sorry. Girls like that." In the First Bedroom, Sydney's rummaging in the closet. Andy enters the room kind of tentatively, calling out, "Syd?" She bustles out without looking at or greeting him and asks, "Have you seen a grey cable-knit sweater?" He hasn't. He says he called her at the office today. Sydney goes on about not wanting to leave the sweater, since it's her sister's, and he asks where she's going. She keeps looking through drawers as she tells him, "I'm going home, and then I'm going to Hartford." He wants to know what's in Connecticut. She replies, "Richard Reynolds's campaign. He may be able to get me a job." Andy asks, "When did you decide to get a new job?" Sydney finally looks at him as she opens a closet: "Not long after Leo Solomon fired me from my old one. Beth's gonna kill me..." Andy asks why Leo fired her. From within the closet, she says, "Total failure to achieve any of the objectives for which I was hired. I told him he was being unreasonable. After all, I did get to dance with the President and ride in Air Force One a couple of times. But you know those prickly environmentalists. It's always gotta be something with them. If it's not clean air, then it's clean water. Like it isn't good enough that I'm on the cover of People magazine." She keeps rushing around the room. Andy says he'll call Leo. Sydney bombs around, yanking drawers in and out as she replies, "You'll call him? You mean you'll call him yourself? Personally? It'll come from the President? That's a great idea. I think you should call Leo and make a deal. He hires me back for, say, seventy-two days. I go around scaring the hell out of Congress, making them think that the President's about to drive through a very damaging and costly bill. They'll believe me, right, 'cause I'm the President's Friday Night Girl. Now I don't know if you can dip into that well twice, especially since I've lost all credibility in politics, but you never know, I might be able to just pull it off again. I might be able to give you just the leverage you need to pass some groundbreaking piece of crime legislation, like a mandatory three-day waiting period before a five-year-old can buy an Uzi. Oh, fuck the sweater! She'll have to learn to live with disappointment." Sydney's about to leave when Andy asks, "What do you think went on here today?" She stops and says, "I know exactly what went on here today. I got screwed. You saw the poll, you needed the crime bill, you couldn't get it on your own, so I got screwed!" She's pretty tearful. He replies in an irritatingly low-key way, "The environment got screwed, Sydney. Nothing happened to you. Governing is choosing. Governing is prioritizing. I've made no secret of the fact that the crime bill was my top priority." Sydney snaps, "Well then, congratulations. It's only taken you three years to put together crime prevention legislation that has no hope of preventing crime." She's headed for the door again when he says, "Syd, please. I don't want to lose you over this." Sydney: "Mr. President, you've got bigger problems than losing me. You just lost my vote." And she's gone. In the billiard room, A.J.'s asking what's in Hartford. POTUS tells him about the Reynolds campaign. As he shoots a ball, he mutters, "Hartford. The insurance capital of the world. Have a good time, Syd." A.J. says Shepherd needs some rest, and that he's going to get Janie to clear this schedule for the weekend. Shepherd asks, "You handling me, A.J.?" A.J. says he's not, but that he will if Shepherd doesn't start taking his head out of his ass. Shepherd: "Excuse me?" A.J. says, "Lewis is right. Go after this guy." Shepherd sighs and asks A.J. whether Rumson has lied in the past seven weeks. A.J. seems confused by the question. Shepherd continues, "Other than not knowing the difference between Harvard and Stanford, has he said something that isn't true? Am I not a Commander-in-Chief who's never served in the military? Am I not opposed to a Constitutional amendment banning flag burning? Am I not an unmarried father who shared a bed with a liberal lobbyist down the hall from my twelve-year-old daughter?" A.J. asks, "And you think you're wrong?" POTUS replies, "I don't think you win elections by telling 59% of the people that they are." A.J. says they fight the fights they can win, the fights that need fighting. Shepherd asks, "Is the view pretty good from the cheap seats, A.J.?" A.J. begs his pardon. The Prez continues, "Because it occurs to me that in twenty-five years I've never seen your name on a ballot! Now why is that? Why are you always one step behind me?" A.J. replies, "Because if I hadn't, you'd be the most popular history professor at the University of Wisconsin." Burn! Shepherd's enraged; he throws his pool cue on to the table and shouts, "Fuck you!" As he puts on his jacket, he tells A.J., "Have Lewis put the final draft of the State of the Union on my desk in the morning." A.J. says, "Yes, sir." As the Prez gets to the door, he asks, "If Mary hadn't died...would we have won three years ago?" A.J. repeats, "Would we have won?" Shepherd continues, "If we'd had to go through a character debate three years ago, would we have won?" A.J. quietly says, "I don't know. But I would've liked that campaign. If my friend Andy Shepherd had shown up, I would have liked that campaign very much." Neither of them are looking at each other. POTUS leaves. Shepherd paces all over the White House, finally settling in the Oval Office. The morning, Robin is fielding questions at a press briefing. One reporter asks, "Robin, will the President ever respond to Senator Rumson's question about being a member of the American Civil Liberties Union?" Before Robin gets to answer, POTUS unexpectedly bursts in, saying, "Yes, he will." Everyone stands as he walks to the podium. Y'all might want to go and get some snacks or sustenance now because I warn you, this is a long one. He can speechify to beat the band. Shepherd begins, "For the last couple of months, Senator Rumson has suggested that being president of this country was, to a certain extent, about character. And although I have not been willing to engage in his attacks on me, I've been here three years and three days, and I can tell you without hesitation: being President of this country is entirely about character. For the record: yes, I am a card-carrying member of the ACLU. But the more important question is: why aren't you, Bob? This is an organization whose sole purpose is to defend the Bill of Rights, so it naturally begs the question [sic]: why would a senator, his party's most powerful spokesman and a candidate for president, choose to reject upholding the Constitution? If you can answer that question, then, folks, you're smarter than I am, because I didn't understand it until a couple of minutes ago. America isn't easy. America is advanced citizenship." Leon and A.J. show up, looking nervous and puzzled. Shepherd continues:

You gotta want it bad, 'cause it's gonna put up a fight. It's gonna say, 'You want free speech? Let's see you acknowledge a man whose words make your blood boil, who's standing centre stage and advocating, at the top of his lungs, that which you would spend a lifetime opposing at the top of yours. You want to claim this land as the land of the free? Then the symbol of your country cannot just be a flag; the symbol also has to be one of its citizens exercising his right to burn that flag in protest.' Now show me that. Defend that. Celebrate that in your classrooms. Then you can stand up and sing about the land of the free. I've known Bob Rumson for years. I've been operating under the assumption that the reason Bob devotes so much time and energy to shouting at the rain was that he simply didn't get it. Well, I was wrong. Bob's problem isn't that he doesn't get it. Bob's problem is that he can't sell it. We have serious problems to solve and we need serious people to solve them. And whatever your particular problem is, I promise you, Bob Rumson is not the least bit interested in solving it. He is interested in two things and two things only: making you afraid of it and telling you who's to blame for it. That, ladies and gentlemen, is how you win elections. You gather a group of middle-aged, middle-class, middle-income voters who remember with longing an easier time, and you talk to them about family and American values and character. And you wave an old photo of the President's girlfriend. You scream about patriotism and you tell them she's to blame for their lot in life, and you go on television and you call her a whore. Sydney Ellen Wade has done nothing to you, Bob. She has done nothing but put herself through law school, represent the interests of public school teachers, and lobby for the safety of our natural resources. You want a character debate, Bob? Fine, but you better stick with me, 'cause Sydney Ellen Wade is way out of your league. I've loved two women in my life. I lost one to cancer, and I lost the other 'cause I was so busy keeping my job I forgot to do my job. Well, that ends right now. Tomorrow morning, the White House is sending a bill to Congress for its consideration. It's White House Resolution 455, an energy bill requiring a 20% reduction of the emission of fossil fuels over the ten years. It is by far the most aggressive stride ever taken in the fight to reverse the effects of global warming. The other piece of legislation is the crime bill. As of today it no longer exists. I'm throwing it out. I'm throwing it out and writing a law that makes sense. You cannot address crime prevention without getting rid of assault weapons and handguns. I consider them a threat to national security, and I will go door to door if I have to, but I'm gonna convince Americans that I'm right, and I'm gonna get the guns. We've got serious problems, and we need serious people, and if you want to talk about character, Bob, you'd better come at me with more than a burning flag and a membership card. If you want to talk about character and American values, fine. Just tell me where and when, and I'll show up. This is a time for serious people, Bob, and your fifteen minutes are up. My name is Andrew Shepherd, and I am the President.

Shepherd leaves the room with purposeful strides; everyone, of course, is clamoring. Leon, Lewis, and A.J. follow Shepherd out, A.J. remarking, "Well, you don't see that every day of the week." Lewis says, "He's got the whole White House Press Corps asking each other how to spell 'erudite.'" That's just bad on so many levels. A.J. tells Lewis he had better call the printer. Lewis knows: "We gotta rewrite the State of the Union." A.J.: "Every word, kid. It's a whole new ball game. You have exactly thirty-five minutes." Lewis: "Oh, good. I thought I was gonna be rushed." They hurry off. Shepherd is on his phone in the Oval Office: "I don't want a limousine. I don't want an escort. I want a plain, ordinary, non-bulletproof automobile....Well, somebody around here must have a Chevy I can borrow....Well, find one and have it outside the West Wing entrance in five minutes." A.J. comes in and asks, "Where are you going?" POTUS says, "I'm going to her house. I'm gonna stand at her front door till she lets me in. And I'm not leaving till I get her back." A.J. wonders how Shepherd thinks he's going to do that. Shepherd: "Well, I haven't worked that out yet. But I'm sure groveling will be involved." A.J. inquires, "You're just gonna drive over?" He replies, buttoning his coat: "A.J., I'm Commander-in-Chief of the most powerful army in the world. You don't think I can drive ten blocks?" From offscreen, we hear Sydney's voice: "Just stay away from Dupont Circle. I hear it's murder this time of day." She's wearing a hooded sweatshirt under a winter jacket. She and Andy just stare at each other. Sydney greets A.J. He responds, and says, "If anybody needs me, I'll be in the Roosevelt Room, giving Lewis oxygen." He leaves. She says, "I heard your speech. I was in my car, and it just kind of steered its way over here." She's all teary. Andy says he's glad. He and Sydney start walking toward each other. He tells her he's not sending 455 to the floor to get her back. She says, "I didn't come back 'cause you decided to send 455 to the floor." She's about to burst into tears and they hug each other like crazy. Suddenly Lewis busts in with a question about the address, and Janie busts in with a message that Leventhal at Treasury wants two minutes, and then Mrs. Chapil busts in to say that Robin's on her way over. Well, that was nice while it lasted. Andy tells Sydney she's got some work to do. They smooch. A shot of Washington at night. A news anchor voice-over says, "We're only a moment or two away from the arrival of President Shepherd and his State of the Union address. George, you've served on the staffs of several past administrations, what kind of last-minute activity is the President engaged in right now?" The scene switches to Sydney and Andy lovingly gazing at each other in a private room. She's in a navy blue suit and pearls, looking very First Lady-ish. He says, "There's been something I've been trying to give you since our first date. I tried a bunch of times, but somehow I've always managed to trip over my job." He reaches under his coat on a chair, pulls out a bouquet of red roses, and presents them to her. She's thrilled: "They're beautiful." She kisses him. Janie comes to fetch him; Sydney asks whether she should stay there. He says, "No, walk with me." Out in the hallway, Sydney asks him, "How'd you finally do it?" Andy asks, "Do what?" She responds, "Manage to give a woman flowers and be President at the same time." Andy says, "Well...it turns out I've got a rose garden." He veers off to his right and enters a chamber as people begin applauding. The Doorkeeper bellows, "Mr. Speaker! The President of the United States!" President Andrew Shepherd walks along, greeting and gladhanding folks, to the sound of thunderous applause and stirring music. And the very romantic, undeniably appealing idea that a rousing speech and courageous, inspirational words can sweep away differences and unite opposed parties remains intact. It's a nice dream, especially as scripted by Aaron Sorkin. Hey, wouldn't something like this make a hell of a television series?