By Miss Alli
Previously on The West Wing: Mallory broke it to Leo that the former Mrs. Leo is in training to become the non-former Mrs. New Guy. Marina Lewinsky asked where the dumpsters were, and Toby called her "a walking lawsuit," because young women are inherently threatening, as you know. Toby also got to be the point guy on the State of the Union. Well, isn't Toby just Mr. Lucky Poodlepants.
The title card does its official duty ("The Benign Prerogative," it announces), and then we swing into the offices, where Toby is whistling at C.J., and it is January 20th TCT. Toby has just remembered "why [he] love[s] this night." C.J. points out that in a couple of hours, he'll be done, and he'll be drinking, and that's why he loves it. I feel you, Toby. The dialogue is remarkably mumbly here as C.J. and Toby talk about the press conference and the president's doing well and something something something. Seriously, the actors need to stop eating crackers during taping, or they need to get a new sound guy, or both. I have perfectly good hearing, and it takes me about three runs through this scene to understand what they're saying. Even then, I don't pick up quite everything. Abruptly, Toby and C.J. encounter Marina, who has returned and is busy tucking "extra gum" in Toby's suit pocket in case he gets nervous. She walks off, and C.J. ignores her urge to say, "That girl just gave you gum...the hell?" and just asks Toby if he's going to go "pace on the Hill." "After I finish pacing here," he says. Does anyone on this show do anything but pace around? Speaking of which, C.J. paces into her office, passing Carol on the way. Carol sticks her head in and says, "It's Gentle Ben. On hold." C.J. looks stricken. "You put him on hold?" she asks. "That's what you told me to do!" Carol snaps impatiently before walking away. I love Carol, because she occasionally points out that smart people are acting like dumb-asses. It can't happen often enough. Just after Carol leaves, Donna approaches and gets just inside C.J.'s door. "Donna, my darling," C.J. begins warmly, asking Donna to pick up Ben and put him back down for her gently. But Donna looks far too grave for that, and because she is not an insensitive clod like, say, Josh, C.J. actually notices. "What's wrong?" C.J. says.
We then cut to what is apparently a bit later, as C.J. and Toby stride purposefully down the hall, accompanied by Josh and Donna. They're all talking about how Leo will want to tell POTUS something, and whether something changes anything, and Toby says, "One hour. Guy couldn't wait one hour?" "My God, Toby," Donna says, horrified. Quite correctly horrified, as it will turn out. Toby apologizes, because he absolutely has to. C.J. aims for Leo's office, and there, she asks Margaret whether Leo's left yet. Margaret says no: "They're having tea." Will wanders in and asks in a dark tone if they heard. When they say they did, he asks if the president has heard. It's strange how much too long that scene felt, given that it was short. That's about twice as much "have you heard" and "oh, yes, have you heard, I heard from him, has she heard" as I could ever actually need.
Now it's January 6th, TCT (they do not treat us to a card saying, "Almost A Week After New Year's Eve"), and Carol and C.J. are yammering. Turns out Carol has been taking calls to C.J. from a "husky voice in the 907 area code" that turns out to belong to C.J.'s persistent "friend" Ben, who wants to know if C.J. is mad at him. An unusually evasive C.J. scampers away to talk to Toby and compliment him on his first draft of the SOTU. "You nailed it," she says with a smile. He looks nervous and jumpy as she asks him what he's going to do for two weeks (because it is also "Two Weeks Before State Of The Union") now that it's done. He points out that he has pollsters waiting to meet with him. They've been testing the draft and are here to give the word. C.J. assures him that everything will be fine.
Cut to Josh's office, where he has just been told that Joey Lucas stopped by. You can tell, if you are really paying close attention, because he says, "Joey Lucas stopped by?" "She was sorry you weren't in yet. Nice suit," Donna says in her best nonchalant manner. Josh, all twitchy, asks whether it was a "heads-up, pre-meeting kind of stopping by" or a "long time, no see" kind of stopping by. Donna doesn't answer. Josh asks Donna how Joey looked. "Great," Donna says. "I heard she was seeing somebody," Josh says. "Yeah, I think she is," Donna deadpans. I don't care how ditzy she sometimes is; I kind of love Donna. "Did she say she was seeing somebody?" Josh asks. Donna: "Well...." Josh speculates that "maybe the time is ripe." "Maybe not so much," Donna says gently. Josh chides Donna for not being supportive, what with the new year ("Sixth Day Of New Year") and the clean slates and the blank calendar page and all. Just then, Joey walks in behind them. "Josh?" she says, and he and Donna turn around. Joey gives a jaunty wave while patting her quite-quite-pregnant belly. Ohhh, Josh. Yeah, maybe not so much, indeed. She pats her belly, and Josh, in response, pops his mouth open about a third and...God, it's brilliant, facial-expression-wise. And it's entirely true, what Deborah's been saying forever -- what they do to these actors with the suck-ass writing is a felony, because they are all damn good.
Anyway, we then move to the pollster meeting, which includes Joey and Kenny as well as Toby, Josh, and Leo. Joey is pointing out that the numbers on the draft are awesome, and that she can't even suggest anywhere to improve it. Two weeks to go, and they've got the SOTU knocked. Toby can't accept this at face value, of course, so he stands up and walks around fretting. Joey adds that week, in preparation for the speech, they'll do "mall testing" on the key paragraph. Toby says something snotty about the mall testing, as usual, and Joey emphasizes that it's not content she's focusing on now, but "tone." Toby, of course, knows all about tone. Oh, no, not that kind of tone. Toby continues down this line of being a completely uncooperative dickweed as Joey tries to explain the kind of testing she plans to do. Does it ever occur to Toby to trust other people to do their jobs and not treat them like everything they say is worthy of ridicule? I think that my Toby complaint goes farther than the stupid anti-Islam stuff I was talking about last week -- more generally, the fact that Toby is now consistently a jerk and no one seems to notice or care is one of my major complaints. Anyway, Joey encourages Toby to come on the mall tour and watch if he's so damn skeptical, and Leo says it's a good idea. Probably because it gets Toby out of Leo's hair. I'd certainly want him out of mine, if I were in Leo's shoes.
Jed and Abbey make their exit. "Could there be a worse time to consider pardons?" Josh asks after they're gone. Leo says meaningfully that he doesn't want Jed distracted. Josh asks if that means he should "drag [his] feet" working on the pardon list, and Leo says, "How about you don't break your neck?" This, after the damn president just told you he wanted it sped up. That's wrong, what Leo and Josh just did. Fellas, if you think the guy's being dumb, tell him he's dumb and make your argument. But he's elected. You're not. People voted for him. Nobody voted for you. You don't overrule him like that by not doing your job when he tells you to. That's bullshit. A surprised Angela asks whether that's the usual dynamic between Abbey and Jed, although again, the end of her line is very difficult to hear. Josh comments that, in fact, he's "never seen her weigh in like that -- not on policy." They both seem curious as to whether Leo noticed the weirdness. "He's sleeping on it," Leo says defensively. "That's all I heard." He leaves.
It is January 10th. ("Three Hundred Fifty-Five Days Before New Year's Eve.") Around the office, C.J. is asking for reassurance from Josh that no matter what she hears, it is not true that the president is considering pardoning LeSeur. Or giving clemency to a former Republican governor who was corrupt and is now dying. Josh the foot-dragger insists that POTUS isn't really considering doing these things officially, but admits that the pardon attorney from Justice has been called in to meet with White House counsel. C.J. asks if she can say that the ongoing process of reviewing petitions marches on, but the president isn't considering pardons right at the moment. Josh shrugs and says that would be okay.
Donna hefts a huge stack of files and stumbles into Josh's office, where she dumps them on the desk. He walks in just then, and she explains that they're case files for the meeting today with the pardon attorney from Justice. Donna says that there are thirty-six files, and that each of them has the "original trial record" as well as a bunch of other stuff. Uh, no. If these people are in for as long as they apparently are, their "trial record" is not going to fit in a folder of which Donna can carry thirty-six. Their "trial record" would likely come in on a handcart. "Don't leave them here," Josh spits. "They said you wanted to take a look," says a confused Donna. It becomes clear that Josh doesn't want to look -- he just wants Donna to take a look. In retrospect, it's interesting to contemplate how aware Josh has to have been of how this was going to go if he put Donna, a known soft touch, in charge of reviewing the files, no? Anyway, he tells her to familiarize herself with all the specifics of all thirty-six of the cases. Nifty. Sounds like a good time.
According to the ever-helpful titles, we are now at the "Grand Rapids Mall." ("Five Blocks East Of Dairy Queen.") Joey is standing by some video monitors and explaining to Toby (and, peripherally, to Marina Lewinsky) how they get people to sit down and watch three different executions of the same bit of talk, done by the same actor in different ways. Do they really do this? Gross, I feel kind of dirty. Toby makes a snotty comment about how much the whole thing resembles a game show, and Joey points out that political types generally are smart enough to understand the similarities between what they're doing and traditional salesmanship. Marina says she would go for the second of the three versions; it's strong without being "mean." Joey smiles and agrees that that's the most popular version among the surveyed, as well. Toby, icked out all of a sudden by Marina, goes off to get coffee. "Don't forget, we're a left turn at the Mrs. Fields!" Marina chirps after him. He looks back at her, icked out all over again.
Charlie, clearly on the phone with Gabi, tells her that he'll give her a tour this weekend, but -- you knew it was coming -- I can't understand the beginning of his line. He asks for her birthday and social security number so that he can wave her in (I think that's what he says, anyway), and then he hangs up upon the arrival of the lovely Will, of whom we are not seeing nearly enough. I have to say, Malina was a hell of a lot cuter on Sports Night. They've done strange things to his hair, among other things, but he also seems...I don't know, highly doughy. It's not attractive. Anyway, he wants to know if the president can meet for a couple of minutes with a couple of campaign contributors who are coming to town while the VP is away. Charlie promises to do his best, but adds, "No promises," in this kind of I-control-access, lick-my-shoes way. I would say the two characters who have been the most ruined are (1) Toby; and (2) Charlie. Charlie is just...kind of an arrogant ass now. What happened to Old Charlie, anyway?
Leo walks into the Office of O, and Jed immediately says, "Did you know that Woodrow Wilson averaged 344 acts of clemency a year?" Oh, good. Trivia. Coolidge was at 326, Jed adds, and FDR over three hundred. He says, with some apparent surprise, that presidents used to give clemency routinely, and somewhere along the line, they practically stopped giving it at all. Recent presidents, he says, have averaged forty, twenty, and seven pardons per year. Leo writes it off to law and order becoming a national concern, as if nobody ever thought about crime before, like, Clinton. Whatever, Leo. Jed counters that the process is more hidden, too -- there are no records kept of pardon deliberations, no reasons are given as to why they're granted -- the only ones you remember are the ones that are controversial. Leo asks whether Jed is under the impression that Leo's against issuing pardons, and assures him that he isn't. This despite the fact that Leo specifically encouraged Josh to subvert the president's request to expedite the granting of pardons? That, right there, was a lie. If nothing else, it was a lie of omission. Leo and Jed debate the possible pitfalls of harsh sentences, and bad FBI behavior, and Indian reservations, and cancer-ridden ex-politicians. Leo starts to say that he knows Abbey has been getting letters from tribal leaders about LeSeur, and Jed cuts him off by asking whether Josh is sitting in on the meeting with the pardon attorney. "He's in and out," Leo essentially lies to Jed -- again. Knowingly -- again. Leo finally lets on that, actually, White House counsel isn't even coming. "It's more...preliminary," he says uncomfortably. Jed stops. He looks around the room, wondering if he was imagining it when he thought he heard himself say last night that he wanted the pardons sped up. "Is Deputy Counsel there?" Leo says nothing. "Who is in this meeting, Leo?" Jed asks, clearly becoming annoyed.
Cut to the meeting. Who's carrying the ball for the White House? Donna. "I'll get you an answer," she promises the woman sitting across the table from her. The woman -- as it turns out, the pardon attorney -- asks whether the president wants "packing peanuts," an expression that confuses Donna. Just then, the president rolls into the meeting. He introduces himself to the pardon attorney, who confirms that she's had this job for three administrations now. "How do I stack up?" Jed asks. "You're about at par," she says, not unkindly. I like her immediately. I firmly believe that if you ask a question like that, you deserve an honest answer. Jed takes a list from her, and she explains that it's a list of first-time offenders who have served at least five years of a sentence of ten years or more under the guidelines. And they're all nonviolent. Donna brings up the "packing peanuts" expression, and then...
...it is Sunday, TCT ("Three Days Before Wednesday"), and a business-casual Charlie is walking Gabi through the White House. They break for a little distance-nuzzling in the hallway, and then continue their walk. She says she was relieved when he called again, and she assures him that she's really "kind of a prude" and never does "that." "Fooled me," Charlie smarms, and walks her into the lobby. He tells her that the president is meeting with some college editors for Martin Luther King Day, and that he set it up with C.J. for Gabi to come along. She thanks him, saying she's "nervous already." Oh, for later? That's where she most definitely should've told him. Right there. Take him in an office, get it done. Anytime after that is too late.
Charlie walks Gabi (whose name is actually Meeshell) into the offices and introduces her to Donna. He asks Donna what she's doing here, and she says it's "too depressing" to talk about. I know the feeling, Donna. Not this week as much as last week, but still, I know the feeling. She plunks down at her desk and opens a new file. Sigh.
Jed and Abbey chat in the residential kitchen (I think). He explains that the low-profile cases are called "packing peanuts." They serve as insulation, as it were, for anyone more controversial that he wants to get out of jail. Abbey asks if he's being pressured, and he's basically like this: "Duh." Jed hypothesizes that maybe if he pardons a Chippewa and a Republican, they will cancel each other out. Heh. This line causes me to have a brief flash of recollection that I used to love this show. Abbey brings up LeSeur again, and Jed says that it'll have to wait for another time. Right now, it's the mandatory-minimum drug offenders that are on the table: "I can't sign a bill that toughens guidelines and ties judges' hands. Turn around month and abdicate judicial discretion." Abbey gives him some warm milk, and he grumbles, but he takes it. Abbey asks Jed if he's afraid this will be "another Wallace Turner." He says he is, a little. She reassures him that he was a new governor at the time, and listened to his parole board. Apparently, Jed pardoned someone (Wallace Turner! I am paying attention!) who got up to mischief after being released, and -- understandably -- Jed is carrying some baggage about it. Jed also mentions that Leo thinks it's a bad time for pardons. Abbey says that Leo is thinking about the SOTU, not the policy -- he just doesn't like it when Jed is "sleepless and distracted" heading into a key political moment. "Do you hate to see me sleepless and distracted?" he asks her. "This is just your preamble," she says. "You're about to be inspired." See? Now that did not suck. That was an entire scene that did not suck. It was even a little bit preachy and anvillicious, and yet it did not suck. People attempting to write episodes of this show in the future that do not suck should consider that scene and try to emulate it in terms of its non-sucking. Because it did not suck.
But anyway, thinking just what I'm thinking about what a good speech it was, Leo asks Toby if he's taking notes. Anyway, they talk some about keeping all thirty-six -- or, you know, thirty-five once we screw the rich kid. "Is she waiting outside?" Jed asks somberly. "She is," Josh says, "but --" "No, she took the bullet we all managed to dodge," Jed says in his best presidential tone. "Show her in, please." Josh goes over and opens the door, and just from the way he opens it, you know it's Donna. She comes into the Office of O, clearly still a little intimidated, even after all this time. When Donna is inside, she says that she promised Mrs. Kaeler she'd do her best to deliver the message. And the message is that Donovan screwed up, and he was a teenager. The divorce was going on at the time, and it was very hard on him. His arrest gave the family "a wake-up call." Donovan went through drug treatment, finished high school, and got into college. The guidelines, however, tied the judge's hands at the trial. The family got through his first year, and then the last six have been "a frozen hell." "She's someone who copes," Donna says. "But she said if it would make a difference...she'd get on her knees. She begged for your mercy." Donna pauses, then she nods a little. "That's all," she says. She looks at Jed expectantly. "Thank you, Donna," he says. Donna leaves. When she is gone, Leo leans forward in his seat. "Mr. President?" he says. "Take him," Jed says gravely. "Take Donovan off the list." There is silence. "You can pardon him in the spring, after the dust settles," Leo says finally. Jed, not very much comforted, says, "Yeah." That's a good scene, too. They had a couple of good ones in this episode, all in this one story. Everything else? Is crap.
It is January 20th. ("Thirteen Days Before Groundhog Day.") The Morning Of The State Of The Union. ("Gee, Thanks.") In the Office of O, Jed is giving an address from the desk about why he's giving the pardons. "I...extend these clemencies," he says, "like amnesties after a prolonged and bloody war, to some among us who have fallen to a ravaging and confounding enemy." He says that reenlisting the wisdom of judges is the best way to be smart about crime.
We then switch to that night, before the speech; Leo is in his office, watching the morning address on tape. Abbey walks in behind him: "That's our boy." Ew, her boxy jacket makes her look like a truck. Leo stands up. Without facing her, he says, "If it was you whispering 'pardons' in his ear...it was the right thing." "I don't whisper, Leo," she says. "That's not how it works between us. My job is to help Jed be as good a president as he is a man." Leo turns around. "Oh?" "I'm not going to sit back and judge anymore," says Abbey. "I'm going to jump in and get my hands dirty." Well...as long as she remembers that nobody voted for her, either. "We can use the help," Leo says, more graciously than Abbey probably deserves. She invites him into the room for a cup of tea. They talk about President's Weekend, and she assures him that they do really want Leo to come. It turns out that Leo was thinking she might want to take it back due to Mrs. Leo's upcoming nuptials, which are apparently that weekend. Just then, Jed bursts in, asking about two possible ties he may wear for the speech. "Which one of these screams 'dominance'?" he asks. "Do I get to wear it afterwards?" Abbey asks. "No comment," Jed says gruffly. Heh. It's nice when people over twenty-five are still hot for each other on television. Abbey pointedly tells Jed that Leo thinks they should reconsider and attend his ex-wife's wedding. Leo, as nicely as he can, says that Mrs. Leo would really like it if they went. Jed and Abbey banter about how they intend to send a gift, but no, they will not be going. They will be keeping their plans with Leo. And they will be doing a nice thirty-second shtick that's designed to make Leo smile, and does. And that's a reasonably good sequence, too. "We've always loved Jenny," Jed wraps up. "But you're the one we want to spend the weekend with," Abbey adds. They toast with tea. Nice.
Donna takes a call in Josh's office as we see C.J. and Toby walking by, having the conversation they were having at the opening of the episode. Donna listens to the phone. Her face falls.
Angela walks Meeshell into the White House, and they chat about how great it is that her job is officially, actually, truly going to start. Angela congratulates her. Meeshell asks if she should maybe just stick her head in and say hi to Charlie. Angela's like, "Um, no." She tries to tell Meeshell that it's just a bad idea, especially an hour before the SOTU (duh), but Meeshell won't listen. When Angela is gone, she wanders toward Charlie's office.
Elsewhere, a crushed Donna glumly leaves Josh's office and heads for C.J.'s. And this is her moment with C.J. from the opening as well. C.J. starts to ask her to take the call from Ben, but then sees that something is very, very wrong. And what is it? Well, Ann Kaeler, Donovan's sister, just called to share the news that Donovan killed himself. "Who's Donovan?" says a confused C.J. Nice, idiots, not to remember that C.J. had a boyfriend get killed a year and a half ago, and his name? Was also Donovan. So that's idiotic, right there. At any rate, Donna just stares back at her miserably.
We see Will striding quickly, dodging Marina, who's saying she's lost track of Toby. Will heads straight for the Toby-C.J.-Josh-Donna powwow. The doors to the Office of O open, and they are invited in to break up that nice tea party with this bad news. Donna, knowing she can't handle the meeting, takes off. "I've got this," Josh says, following her.
And in Charlie's office, the other saga of the evening arrives, as Meeshell wanders into the office. She says his name. He says her last name. She hits him. Jed enters, then exits.
Josh and Donna are standing outside, among the police cars and the flashing lights and the people who are part of the parade to the Hill for the SOTU. He assures her that there's nothing she could have done. She says, "It's stupid," and he assures her that it's not stupid. "You met them," he says. "They got to you." "I need to learn how not to be so...how to keep things at arm's length," she says. He waits a second, and then says, "I hope not." My recommendation to Donna? Get out of politics, because otherwise, you will learn how, and you will be sad when you realize you have. Toby comes over and says that it's time to leave, and that the president would like Donna to escort the guests -- who are some of the pardoned and their families, apparently. Josh puts an arm around Donna, and they take off.
Charlie and Meeshell continue their fight, still in among the dialogue from earlier. Charlie is finally called away, and they part ways. As she's leaving, Charlie says that the first two weeks with her were "pretty great." "When you thought I was nobody?" she asks. "No threat?" "I protect him," Charlie says. "It's my job." She assures him that she meant no threat to Charlie or to Jed. "When you said he wasn't just the president, I understood," she says. Uh, in spite of the fact that she asked him what he meant. He tells her he'll see her around. She leaves.
Now it is Two Hours Later. ("Three Hours Earlier Than Four Hours After One Hour From Now.") We are post-SOTU, and the news coverage is playing at the post-speech party. The news coverage suggests that the speech went over very well. Donna leads some folks into the reception, and she tells them that the president will be in shortly.
Inside, Donna talks to a guy who seems to be with an organization that lobbies for clemency. He tells her how great it was to be able to call the thirty-five families and tell them that the pardons were coming through. Just then, Jed enters. Donna introduces the president to the guy, who indeed turns out to be with Families Against Mandatory Minimums, and the woman with him -- who is his sister Candy, just pardoned. They thank him profusely. Candy says that she can never repay Jed, and Jed says she can repay him by using her second chance wisely. After all, as he points out, if she screws up again, it will hurt her and her family, but also him and all the other prisoners who are hoping to be released. Ooh, tough. But fair and true. "Am I right, Donna?" he says. She agrees. He admonishes Candy again to use her pardon wisely, and she promises she will. He shakes her hand and leaves. "Bless you all," says Candy's brother, adding to Donna, "It must be an honor to work for him." Donna stares after Jed for a moment, and then, conflicted but very slightly smiling, says, "It is."
That was reasonably good. It wasn't very good, and there was too much in it that was total crap for it to be considered consistently good. But had they trimmed off the crap and put more than five minutes of work into any of the minor stories, there are parts of that that were as good as anything they turned out...well, no, not in the first season, but prior to the complete breakdown in quality of the last season or two.
Not to damn with faint praise or anything.