No Guts, No Gory

Recapped by Angel Cohn · Aired 11-07-2010 · S01E02

Rick is still inside the tank, which is surrounded by walkers. Glen, the voice on the walkie-talkie, advises him on how to get out alive by making a run for it to a nearby alley. He barely makes it to a fire escape and is OK, mostly because it turns out that walkers aren't very good climbers. Glen takes Rick to his secret hidey-hole (in a department store), where four other people (T-Dog, Jacqui, Morales and Andrea) aren't all that happy about the new arrival, since he did bring a lot of walkers out of the woodwork. There's a fifth, Merle Dixon, who likes to do some sharpshooting for fun and is a total racist.

They decide to make Glen a guinea pig to go into the sewer to see if that's a viable option, while T-Dog and Dixon share some eloquent conversation on the roof. When the sewer doesn't pan out (rat-eating zombies and all), Rick gets a brainy idea to cover himself and Glen in zombie guts in order to mask their living smell so they can make it to a construction site to get a truck. And then it starts raining. Glen and Rick manage to get themselves out of this crazy mess, and Rick shows off some hotwiring skills. Was he always a cop? A handcuffed Dixon gets left behind in a really inhuman way by an angry (and clumsy) human, but the rest of the gang makes it out.... and Glen gets to put the pedal to the metal. Glad he didn't die, it seemed dicey there for a minute.

In the boring storyline that I really couldn't care less about, Lori goes for a walk in the woods and gets freaked out by Shane, who was waiting in the woods for her so they can have sex without prying eyes, though her wedding ring briefly stops them. The only interesting thing is that Glen and company are on a scavenging excursion from this base camp, and Amy and Andrea are sisters. So guessing Shane isn't exactly going to be happy to see his old friend whenever they make it back to base? Awkward.

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We open on Camp Terror, with Dale keeping watch over everything and Lori by the fire. Great, my least favorite aspect of this show, and that's the way this episode starts. I'm bracing myself for the worst this week. Amy comes back from the woods with some mushrooms that may or may not be poisonous. Could we please let some of these people test them? Amy's going to ask Shane when he gets back, in the meantime, Lori is going off to look for more questionable fungi in the woods. Once out there, she starts hearing weird noises and for a minute I get briefly excited that Two-Timing Lori is going to have a zombie encounter, but no, it is just Shane. They had pre-arranged to meet out here so they could have sex away from the prying eyes of her child. The only thing that slows down their frantic encounter is the ring (which maybe is Rick's? Since she's wearing a ring still) and a locket that she wears on a chain around her neck. She quickly tosses that aside into the woods so they can get down to business.

Thankfully, we don't have to see more of that disgusting scenario, as we're treated to a lovely overhead shot of Rick's Tank, the zombies feasting on the poor horse and the swarms of walkers that are still crawling around the tank. I'll take zombies over Lori/Shane sex any day. Rick's inside the tank sweating and panicked, when he gets a call from the voice we heard at the end of last week's episode. The sarcastic voice (which we'll later learn belongs to Glenn) basically tells him that he's up shit creek, but he's got one shot at escape since he's totally surrounded. Glenn tells our idiotic hero that if he could see things from the outside, he'd be even more panicked. Way to be reassuring. Anyway, after Rick does a quick check for weapons, (which includes patting down re-dead army guy) which basically amounts to one clip of his gun, Glenn gives him a plan of how he should make a run for it towards a nearby alley.

Good thing Rick's a decent shot, as all his bullets count -- he really gets the "aim for the head" concept. At least he's good for something. He nearly shoots Glenn, though, but they survive being chased by walker-hordes by the skin of their teeth, mostly thanks to a fire escape stairway. Turns out those zombies aren't all that great at climbing ladders. I've got a feeling this will be good to know for future reference. Up on the fire escape balcony, Glenn introduces himself properly and wonders if Rick has rode in on his poor dead horse to clean up the town. If so, he's going about it all kinds of wrong. Glenn calls him a dumbass, which I appreciate. Once on the roof Rick wants to know why Glenn helped him, and Glenn's answer is basically that he hopes someone would do the same for him, and he realizes this makes him a dumbass. Glenn, I think I love you. This probably means he's totally doomed. Poor kid.

By Angel Cohn

They sneak down a hatch and into a nearby alley, where there are four zombies staggering around. Glen calls for backup, and out come some of his friends. They dispatch the walkers with some baseball bats and then all head back inside a department store. It's here that Rick meets T-Dog, Jacqui, Morales and Andrea. These are Glen's "friends" and none of them are too happy to meet He's the Sheriff and He's an Idiot. Can't say as I blame them. Andrea in particular holds a gun to Rick's head. So therefore, she gains some points in my book.

This ragtag gang is only on a day trip to Atlanta for some supplies, and were hoping to do a quick grab and get out, but He's the Sheriff screwed all that up with his loud shooting and whatnot. The noises brought out pretty much every zombie in a large radius and now the walkers have the store surrounded. So they're all basically screwed, here. Good going, Rick.

They also think Rick is Don Quixote-crazy for chasing after a helicopter that clearly doesn't exist. They also quickly inform him that the refugee center isn't the safe haven that he's looking for, but that they have a group of fellow survivors who are waiting for word on their mission. They hear gunshots and head up to the roof, where we see Merle Dixon (the formidable Michael Rooker) doing some target practice. Why didn't we see him before when Rick and Glen were up on the neighboring roof? Anyway, he waves his gun around, and T-Dog thinks he's wasting bullets and drawing even more zombies to their location. Dixon, in his own uniquely charming way, says that he's not going to take orders from a black man and then starts beating T-Dog to a pulp. How long have they been together that T-Dog is just finding out how racist Dixon is?

After holding a gun to T-Dog's head, the camera makes this great shot from the ground looking up at Dixon, making him look even more self-important as he decides that he should be in charge of this ragtag ground of looters. He reluctantly gains the support of mostly everyone, but Rick hits him with a shotgun and handcuffs him to a pipe. The self proclaimed Officer Friendly informs Dixon that racism is so last year, and there's no need to judge on skin color when he should really be basing his hatred on living vs. dead. I agree with the usually moronic Rick here for a change. Dixon doesn't really agree, even with a gun to his head. Rick walks away shaking, and Morales follows him to find out where he's from and then welcome him to the big city.

T-Dog is still trying to raise a signal to talk to his friends outside of town, while the others are looking at the streets below for a way out. Dixon, who is thankfully still handcuffed, woos Andrea by calling her "sugar-tits" and offering to "bump uglies" with her if she sets him free. She'd rather die, and after watching two relatively attractive people have sex while zombies roam rampant, I'm grateful she's got some common sense. Rick and Morales wonder if the sewers are a viable option. Jacqui happens to know of some possible access points, because she used to work in the city zoning office. Useful. That's pretty much all she gets to do in the episode, but hey, it's something.

Glenn's been to the city on occasion before, but never gone down into the freaky sewer. He isn't keen on going down, but he's volunteered as the guinea pig. The others want to follow him, but he doesn't want a whole group coming. He already feels responsible enough for getting them into this mess, as he usually makes these snatch and grab excursions solo and quickly. He makes Rick and Andrea stand guard by the store windows where the zombies are avidly trying to break in. He and Morales go down in the sewer, while Jacqui keeps lookout. Seems like Glenn's in charge and he didn't even have to be a racist asshole or hold a gun to anyone's head in order to get the post.

Down in the tunnel, it's effing creepy. Up in the store, it's not much better. It's like Black Friday outside, with anxious customers trying to pound their way through the double doors. Do the zombies really just want the latest looks in fashion? Or some great deals on makeup? A little bit of bronzer would really go a long way to making them more attractive. Andrea apologizes for putting a gun to Rick's head, though she does say he deserved it. He gives her tips on how to use her gun, since she had the safety on the whole time.

On the roof, T-Dog is still trying to make contact on his walkie-talkie. Dixon is acting like a real Debbie Downer, but says that if T-Dog goes and gets a hacksaw and cuts him free, he'd have a sunnier disposition. Not that I'm entirely buying that. God, Michael Rooker plays the best creep. T-Dog doesn't think that he wants to free a guy who spews the n-word and beat him to a pulp and will probably shoot the cop. T-Dog may not be able to hold his head up on his own at the moment, but he does have some common sense.

Morales and Glenn find the sewer, but are stopped by a rebar gate. Good thing, since there's a rat-eating zombie right on the other side. The duo can't high-tail it out of there fast enough. Meanwhile, Andrea is shopping for accessories. She finds a mermaid necklace that she thinks her sister would like. She hesitates about just swiping it, and worries about looting (even though that was the entire point of their trip to the city) when the walkers make it through the first set of doors. And since Glenn and Morales just informed the rest that there's no underground way out, things really aren't looking good.

By Angel Cohn

Morales and Glen find the sewer, but are stopped by a rebar gate. Good thing, since there's a rat-eating zombie right on the other side. The duo can't high-tail it out of there fast enough. Meanwhile, Andrea is shopping for accessories. She finds a mermaid necklace that she thinks her sister would like. She hesitates about just swiping it, and worries about looting (even though that was the entire point of their trip to the city) when the walkers make it through the first set of doors. And since Glen and Morales just informed the rest that there's no underground way out, things really aren't looking good.

Back up on the roof they try and hatch a plan that involves distracting the walkers so that they can get to a construction site and steal a van. Rick knows that they're attracted to noise (a hard-won lesson if I've ever seen one), but doesn't know if the walkers can smell a human. This gives him a great idea. He dresses them all in labcoats and gloves, and they go out in the alley and pick up a recently re-dead body. Rick puts on a protective plastic mask, uses a crowbar to open a fire axe box, then gets ready to get to chopping. But first, a moment of silence for Wayne, the re-dead body who is unwittingly donating his organs to such a worthy cause.

Glen and Rick take blood and guts and just cover themselves in it, making sure not to get blood on any of their actual skin. Well, some of them at least, Morales gets blood very close to his mouth when he puts the mask on to help with the chopping, and Andrea uses her bare hand to put her gun in Glen's bloody waistband. Why did poor Glen get volunteered for this suicide mission? Jacqui, T-Dog, Morales and Andrea help make the duo as disgusting as possible. Glen pukes when he thinks about dead puppies and kittens. T-Dog wonders what will become of Merle Dixon, and Rick reaches his bare hand into his pocket to retrieve the handcuff key. I dunno, man, I would not get that stuff anywhere near my pores... just to be safe. They haven't found any Purell at this store. After the key is exchanged, Rick says to Morales: "Give me the axe. I need more guts." I laughed out loud at this, which probably makes me a disturbed person, but seriously, it is the line of the episode.

Back walking the streets of Downtown Atlanta are the only two people I remotely care about, Glenn and Rick. Mostly Glenn. They seem to be blending in with the undead crowd -- well, until it starts downpouring and the Eau de Dead wears off. Morales on the roof says that this is just a passing shower, but that's not going to help my poor little guinea pig Glenn. Once the walkers notice that there are humans among them (because apparently they can't recognize their pinkish complexions) Rick has to use his trusty axe to go split some zombie's head in two. Awesome. Then they make a run for it, hack away with their blunt weapons and hop a fence to get away from the teeming masses.

They do take a moment to shed their gross lab coats, which is a wise choice. Rick has to shoot up some more zombies (where did he get more ammo?) while Glenn gets the keys, and then they grab the truck and head away from the department store. The others think they're being deserted, but Rick's got a plan. They need to make noise in order to draw the walkers away from the dept. store so that the zombies will be distracted and the others can get in the truck. So Rick finds a pretty red sports car, sets off the alarm and then hotwires it. I think he's going to be driving it into the zombies, but no, it is poor, sweet, defenseless Glenn who drew the short straw yet again. Rick gets to drive the totally safer truck.

Glenn tells the others (via walkie-talkie) to get by the service door and be ready for pick-up, and they grab their stuff and head off of the roof. Only T-Dog stops a moment to consider what to do about the screaming Dixon. Against his better judgment he runs back with the key in hand to set him free, but he knocks over the tool kit, trips and the key goes bouncing off into an open pipe nearby. It's a cool shot, but seems quite unlikely. The others have made their way down through the store, and the zombies are getting closer to breaking down the doors, while Dixon starts accusing T-Dog of losing the key on purpose. Yeah, there's just no way he could have done that on purpose if he wanted to. Still, you almost feel for the screaming racist asshole as he begs not to be left behind as defenseless zombie lunch on the roof. T-Dog does carefully lock the door to the roof, which on first viewing I thought was to keep Dixon from getting down and going medieval on T-Dog, but on second viewing I'm hoping was his way of delaying the zombies from munching on Dixon.

The group stands by the garage door waiting for Rick, while Glenn is getting mobbed in his loud little sports car, alarm still blaring. It does seem to be attracting the attention of some, though not the gaggle of fashion-obsessed zombies who have been diligently trying to break down the door. As Rick lets his newfound friends into the truck, the zombies are hot on their trail. If he notices that Merle's not among them, he doesn't say anything immediately. Speaking of which, he's up on the roof yelling and hoping that the rest of his group rots in hell. Fair enough. Inside the truck, there's finally time to do a headcount, and T-Dog says that he dropped the key. Uh-huh. Like anyone is going to buy that story. Andrea finally wonders where Glenn is, and we see him happily speeding out of town on the empty highway that Rick rode his horse on earlier that day, Yay, he's alive. Though one has to wonder how long that car alarm will continue to go off.

By Angel Cohn

They do take a moment to shed their gross lab coats, which is a wise choice. Rick has to shoot up some more zombies (where did he get more ammo?) while Glen gets the keys, and then they grab the truck and head away from the department store. The others think they're being deserted, but Rick's got a plan. They need to make noise in order to draw the walkers away from the dept. store so that the zombies will be distracted and the others can get in the truck. So Rick finds a pretty red sports car, sets off the alarm and then hotwires it. I think he's going to be driving it into the zombies, but no, it is poor, sweet, defenseless Glen who drew the short straw yet again. Rick gets to drive the totally safer truck.

Glen tells the others (via walkie-talkie) to get by the service door and be ready for pick-up, and they grab their stuff and head off of the roof. Only T-Dog stops a moment to consider what to do about the screaming Dixon. Against his better judgment he runs back with the key in hand to set him free, but he knocks over the tool kit, trips and the key goes bouncing off into an open pipe nearby. It's a cool shot, but seems quite unlikely. The others have made their way down through the store, and the zombies are getting closer to breaking down the doors, while Dixon starts accusing T-Dog of losing the key on purpose. Yeah, there's just no way he could have done that on purpose if he wanted to. Still, you almost feel for the screaming racist asshole as he begs not to be left behind as defenseless zombie lunch on the roof. T-Dog does carefully lock the door to the roof, which on first viewing I thought was to keep Dixon from getting down and going medieval on T-Dog, but on second viewing I'm hoping was his way of delaying the zombies from munching on Dixon.

The group stands by the garage door waiting for Rick, while Glen is getting mobbed in his loud little sports car, alarm still blaring. It does seem to be attracting the attention of some, though not the gaggle of fashion-obsessed zombies who have been diligently trying to break down the door. As Rick lets his newfound friends into the truck, the zombies are hot on their trail. If he notices that Merle's not among them, he doesn't say anything immediately. Speaking of which, he's up on the roof yelling and hoping that the rest of his group rots in hell. Fair enough. Inside the truck, there's finally time to do a headcount, and T-Dog says that he dropped the key. Uh-huh. Like anyone is going to buy that story. Andrea finally wonders where Glen is, and we see him happily speeding out of town on the empty highway that Rick rode his horse on earlier that day, Yay, he's alive. Though one has to wonder how long that car alarm will continue to go off.

By Angel Cohn

week: Looks like the campers aren't happy that Merle was left handcuffed to a roof, and hopefully there's an awkward reunion between Lori and Rick. Oh, and presumably Amy gets her necklace... because that's what's really important here.

Discuss this episode in our forums, watch the first episode here, then see what our vlogger thinks of the show when he has No Prior Knowledge, below!