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Wow, a LOT happened this week, and a lot of people's images completely changed as a result. Okay. As it seemed, Claire totally made up the rape, although the reason why is left inferential, and she summarily and unceremoniously gets expelled. Also, Dean Ed cans Nish as the editor of the FreePress due to her bias in failing to report the story. Wallace is into Dean Ed's office, and he did in fact cheat on the Mech E exam. His punishment is...he gets to drop the class. Er. Even more unbelievably, Wallace isn't sure he wants to drop it, because it would mean the end of his major, and I know I wasn't in college this century, but I'm pretty sure people have started majors later than that and still managed to get all their credits. But Wallace sticks the class out. Also, he beats out his friend who encouraged him to cheat for a starting position, but his increased studying eventually gets in the way of his basketball, and he eventually decides to take the semester off basketball, although it doesn't cost him his scholarship. In other cheating news, Horshack and Rider Strong from "My Big Fat Greek Rush Week" are caught cheating off-camera. Also, Harmony calls Keith and basically starts the slippery slope to an affair. It takes a few more steps than that, but it's the essentials of the situation. Veronica has to point out to Keith that what he's doing might not be the best thing for anyone, and it's not something you want to hear from your kid, but she's got a point here. When Harmony invites him to bed, he declines, but then gets hit by a car. I'm not sure exactly what the message is here, but Keith knows, as he goes back and rips Harmony's clothes off. In more important news, Veronica is the only one to get an A on one of Landry's assignments, and he invites her to lunch and offers his services as her faculty adviser. Lucky Tim, however, tells Veronica she's been accused of plagiarism, despite her insistence that someone is setting her up, because her paper showed a positive after being checked for cheating by some computer program. Veronica asks her accuser to identify himself, and surprisingly, some random guy does. Veronica tries to backtrack and find out how her paper ended up in the Hearst database. Her search drives her to break into Dean Ed's office after hours, only Dean Ed is working late. Whoops! Except not, because Dean Ed is too immersed in boxing to care what illicit activities she's up to. Veronica runs into her accuser when he delivers food to Logan at the Neptune Grand. But the real news is that Professor Landry is sleeping with Dean Ed's wife, and Lucky Tim pointed Veronica in his direction, so she could see what he's really like, he claims. Tim also is keeping his own record of the rapes. Elsewhere, Piz invites Veronica bowling, but hedges when she sort of asks him if it's a date, so Veronica invites Logan and Parker along. Wallace bags to study, so it looks like it's going to be a ménage a awkward, but Parker shows up, and has some fun, unlike Piz, who looks like he's going to chew off both his lips at once. Parker takes a shine to Piz, so Veronica asks him if she might like her, but the answer is no. Of course, that's because he's hung up on Veronica, but she doesn't realize that. Parker and a reluctant Veronica go to visit Piz at his radio station, and learn that Mercer has a show as well. Parker freaks, because she recognizes Mercer's cologne from the night she was raped, so Veronica breaks into his room and finds clippers. She goes to Lamb with the info, who tells her when they recovered Mercer's cashbox, they found GHB. Lamb arrests Mercer, but at the end, Logan begs Veronica for help because he was with Mercer the night of one of the rapes -- he just can't tell her where. DUN! Want more? The full recap starts right below!
Before I start, I'd just like to congratulate everyone involved with the show on airing the fiftieth episode of Veronica Mars. Remember those days when we used to sweat every little bit of ratings news that came over the wire? Days like "yesterday" and "last Thursday"? Good thing that's a thing of the past. Also, I'm happy to give this episode the first "A" grade I've handed out in quite some time. Maybe I'm just in a good mood this week. Can't imagine why.
We fade in on the exterior of Dean Ed's office as he's steamrolling Claire's feeble attempts to explain why she faked her rape. Waiting on a bench in the anteroom, Nish glumly asks Veronica if this is what she wanted. Veronica can't believe the question, but if I were her, I'd ask why the hell Claire even exposed herself to the photo or left any kind of trail at all. If she wanted to implicate the Pi Sigs, why didn't she just disappear after the rat-trap incident instead of parading around in front of an ATM camera? Her whole plan seems kind of murky to me. Maybe she didn't expect that she'd be photographed, and maybe she wanted people to see her acting like she'd been roofied, but...the potential costs far outweigh the benefits, it seems to me. I mean, she runs into one person who knows her and isn't in on the plan, he or she insists on taking her home, and the game's up, right? I hope the plan is made clearer at some point. However, given that Dean Ed punts Claire out of Hearst so high and hard that I'm surprised he's not the football team's current placekicker, I'm not holding my breath.
Nish and Veronica have entered the office for this part, and Dean Ed, holding a copy of Veronica's "story" (it seems she typed up her findings and submitted them to Nish, which, for revenge's sake, I could certainly see her doing) rounds on Nish, asking why the story didn't appear in the paper. Nish says that she felt she had a responsibility to tread lightly around the rape issue, because"it [was] a powder keg out there." I guess she was worried that forever was gonna start tonight. Dean Ed acidly points out that Nish wasn't so worried about caution when she implicated the Pi Sigs: "You're supposed to at least pretend to be objective." In fairness to Nish, Dean Ed, that's not always as easy as it sounds. Dean Ed summarily informs Nish that she's no longer the editor of the paper. Nish thinks since it's a student publication, such a decision is outside his purview, but he's basically like, "Purview this, sweetheart." Nish tells him that he'll regret his actions, and on her way out, intones to Veronica, "And so will you." Veronica somehow refrains from suggesting that Nish write a nasty piece about her in the local supermarket shopper's guide.
Outside, Wallace, along with his Mechanical Engineering professor, is in the queue to see Dean Ed, and as Veronica passes him, she gives him an hilarious "What the hell are you doing here?" face. Of course, he does not favor her with anywhere near a similar look in return, which just goes to show that, limited screentime or not, he still remembers something about Veronica.
Inside, Wallace's professor is, in a nice enough tone of voice, telling Dean Ed that Wallace is hardly the first athlete to have been caught cheating in his class. The prof even takes some of the blame; he usually doesn't even take athletes in his program because it's too demanding, "especially with standardized test scores as low as [Wallace's]." I'm surprised that Wallace would have done quite as badly on his SATs as the professor is making it out to sound, but given what we saw last episode, maybe he cheated really badly on them as well. Dean Ed's wife Mindy interrupts for no good reason other than to remind us of her existence and to confirm that Wallace is still heterosexual. When she's gone, Dean Ed asks Wallace what he has to say, and he gives his own rendition of Portia's "The quality of mercy is not strained" speech from The Merchant Of Venice. It's dumbed down quite a bit, but you already heard the part about his SATs.
Professor Landry is back and in a less jovial mood than last time. As Lucky Tim passes out papers, Landry says that he's posted "[their] only example of A-caliber work" on the board. We see Veronica get her paper back with that sole A grade on it, and Landry congratulates her by name. VMVO: "Well, this should make me popular." Yes, it's a real shame you went to such lengths to keep a low profile in this class up to this point. Landry lets the students out, and Lucky Tim kind of dorkily starts to ask him whether he wants to go over something for the class, but Landry blows him off and invites Veronica to lunch. Scene, but not before we get a quick shot of Lucky Tim shooting Veronica a bunny-boiling look. Good thing Backup can take care of himself.
Cut to Landry advocating psychology courses and babbling to Veronica about a double major, and Veronica valiantly stopping herself from doing a spit-take. Landry says he thinks that not only is she a "very bright woman in general," but also "a natural when it comes to criminal work." Give this man a Nielsen box, stat! He asks to be her faculty adviser, and what is it about this school that everyone is getting tracked so early? I thought part of the point of a good liberal arts school was to take as many courses as possible that will have no practical application in life whatsoever. Although now that I think of it, many of those courses did have a practical use, if only for insomniacs. Anyway, Landry goes on that Veronica's capable of great work and adds, "And I'd like to help you do it!" Since Landry brought up psychology, I feel obligated to note that Freud would have loved that one. Landry wraps up his sales pitch, and Veronica gives him a look like he's solved the mystery of her heart. (Sorry, I know that's awful, but her expression is straight off a Harlequin romance cover! It's hilarious!)
In the Mars kitchen, Keith and Veronica are washing up the plates as Veronica's excitedly gushing about how great Landry's offer is, and I can't think that Veronica's calling Landry "the biggest gun in the department" was unintentional on the part of the writers either. Heh. Keith asks her not to phase him out of her life too quickly, and asks if Landry's smarter than he is. Veronica: "Actually, you two have a lot in common." Don't you hate it when sentences wait until the second viewing to punch you in the gut? Veronica heads out of the room, and the phone then rings. Keith answers, and when he hears it's Harmony, he tellingly looks to see if Veronica's out of earshot. Oh, Keith. Harmony tells him that she enjoyed talking to him, and Keith gets all Steve Sanders about agreeing with that sentiment. Harmony tells him that her husband is out of town, and she's got passes to the noir festival, so she invites him to go with her. Keith looks wary, but it's not clear whether it's because of moral misgivings, or if he has some vague notion that the mix of the noir genre and beautiful adulteresses sometimes leads to a bit of trouble for the males involved. Anyway, we don't see Keith's final answer, but his goofy smile kind of gives it away.
Veronica arrives at Lucky Tim's office and says that she got a text message from him requesting her presence. She asks how he got her number, since she doesn't give it out to anyone. Lucky Tim: "You're not the only one at this school who has certain...gifts." Interesting -- I wonder if he's aware of how she invaded his files. Of course, his big trick could just be checking the bathroom stalls at Neptune High. After a joke about Veronica's grandmother's endowments -- and not the kind that would really turn Dean Ed on -- Lucky Tim accuses Veronica of plagiarizing her paper. He claims a classmate of hers recognized the excerpt of her paper in class (although he doesn't say that part explicitly) and told Lucky Tim about it. Tim then ran her paper through a computer program that checks for plagiarism (much like this one, and thanks to the reader that emailed me the link) and it "lit up like a Christmas tree." And given how happy the revelation must have made Lucky Tim, that's a particularly fitting metaphor. (Of course, I think Tim's fudging some of the details here, given what we learn later. He probably put the paper up, and Ratner took it upon himself to run it through the program.) Veronica's aghast, but Lucky Tim shows her the evidence on his computer screen, and suggests that she tells Landry, or he will. Landry's voice cuts in, "Tell who what?" and we see he's entered the office. We go to credits ahead of Veronica saying, "Good news first -- I definitely want you to be my adviser!"
In the food court, Veronica's still in shock when she runs into Piz. He babbles about a woman throwing her husband out of the house and selling all his stuff, including some mint records. Oh, urban legend, you scamp. Veronica informs him that she has three days to prove she didn't cheat, so at the moment, nothing's awesome. Considering what else happened this past Tuesday, I'm going to have to beg to differ. To her credit, though, Veronica seems genuinely worried, yet manages not to be sarcastic or impatient with Piz. Piz invites her bowling, and Veronica's not too worried about her paper to pick up that he might be asking her out on a date. After a moment of considering copping to it, he covers by saying that there will be "a whole gang," including Wallace. Veronica asks if bowling will take her mind off the fact that everyone's out to get her. Piz: "It worked for Nixon." Hee. Veronica smiles, and Piz says that it'll be fun.
On the basketball court, Wallace's jerky friend from last week is wondering why he's so down, since his teacher is letting him drop the class. That's...it? I mean, I know the professor's nice and all, but you'd think that there would have to be some consequences for Wallace cheating. Maybe they saw how bad he was at it and just didn't have the heart. Anyway, when practice starts, the coach gives Wallace the nod for first team for the session, at the expense of "Mason," the dick friend. Ha.
Criminology. Veronica gets in front of the class and boldly and directly asks her accuser to identify himself. After a few moments in which a VMVO suspects that Lucky Tim made the whole thing up, a red-haired kid named "Jeff Ratner" pipes up that he did it. Veronica asks if they've met before. Jeff tells her they have, but she probably doesn't remember. Maybe I'm being paranoid here, but I have a feeling that could be bad news. Jeff, enjoying the attention from the students, says he likes it when "some teacher's pet who's destroying the curve for everyone gets exposed as a cheat. You cheated. I caught you! Deal with it." Now there's that sarcastic look we've all been waiting for. In fairness, though, Jeff did serve her an invitation on a silver platter. At least he's good at his job [SPOILER!]
Veronica pops her head into Wallace's room and calls his name, but the cheater in question, sitting on his bed and playing with a model of a Wright-brothers-era plane, says that it's only "Evil Wallace" who's there. So he's using "evil" to mean "boring," just like the most recent X-Men movie did. Veronica tells him that "Evil Wallace" wouldn't have confessed and faced punishment, and...good for him, I guess, but it doesn't sound like he had much choice. When your Mech E scores say "genius" and your SAT scores say "Rain Man, and not in the good way," you might have to own up to your transgressions. Wallace tells Veronica that he has the chance to drop Mech E scot-free, but that would mean giving it up as his major. I'm at least glad that the model airplane hearkens back to the pilot, but this interest in engineering still seems somewhat sudden. Wouldn't Wallace have worked a little harder in high school? But he tells Veronica that the first thing he was ever into was figuring out how stuff works. This would be more believable with an accompanying story. For example, if there were a real-life reason for Veronica to have gone into detective work, the premise of the show would make a lot more sense. Veronica, after lip-service sympathy, asks whom Wallace bought the test from. Wallace notes that his whole "after-school special monologue didn't make much of an impression." If it's any consolation, Wallace, after reading TWoP for seven years, I can tell you such speeches rarely do. Wallace informs Veronica the guy's name is Max, and tells her where to find him...
...and we cut to Veronica doing just that. Max, chomping on snack foods, helps her determine that the plagiarism program thinks Veronica's paper was originally posted a year earlier. Max: "This must be a real Kafka-esque experience for you." Hee. The look on Veronica's face drives home the knowledge that there's nothing both more infuriating and more dead-on than the nonchalant observations of stoners. Max further supplies Veronica with the knowledge that a "Rory Finch" posted the original paper.
At exactly 2 PM, some guy calls the end to a test. Logan lags a little bit, but he still gets up before the rest of his classmates have dropped their papers on the guy's desk, so it seems a little over the top for the guy to give Logan an bunch of shit en route to saying that he can't accept his test. Logan, however, after ascertaining that the guy doesn't know who he is, shoves his paper into the middle of the pile. This is, as many posters pointed out, a play on another urban legend, but seriously, if the Mech E professor had to administer his own exams, I don't know why a professor of Logan's farmed out that duty to a random proctor. Also, if the proctor doesn't know who Logan is, he should be kept in mind for the time O.J. gets married.
Food Court. Logan is telling Mercer about his exploits between mouthfuls of food. Veronica appears, and after Mercer bails, she invites Logan bowling the night with "Wallace and his roommate." Somewhere, Wallace's roommate's heart dies a little bit more. Veronica then sees Parker sitting by herself, and the show doesn't address this, but I'm thinking she's on her own again because she's disillusioned with the feminists after the whole Claire-faking-her-rape thing. Veronica exposits that Mac's "had this project all week," and Parker's all alone, so they should invite her along. Logan remarks that the whole thing is very Emma, causing Veronica to note that he made an Austen reference, and "the end of days are upon [them]." I'd say that Veronica should really be used to Logan making references that brand him a screaming queen, but given the reference in question, I guess I have to give her a pass for being Clueless. Anyway, Veronica uses Piz's Nixon quip in inviting Parker to go bowling, and is honestly self-deprecating in the process. Hon, you're showing me that hope isn't dead, not that I didn't already know that this week of all weeks.
Harmony and Keith come out The Maltese Falcon, and after some noir banter that's probably about as unfortunate in practice as it sounds conceptually, Harmony thanks Keith for all the good conversation. Keith: "Sure. It's great talkin' to someone for whom 'bogart' isn't a verb." Harmony laughs, and the two of them share a stiff handshake, which pales in comparison to the hug they try out . I'd ask them not to bogart the awkward, if I thought they'd have the slightest idea what I was talking about.
Veronica sneaks into Dean Ed's office area as VMVO tells us that she's got custody of Weevil's keys while he's away at his cousin's wedding. After unsuccessfully trying a number of keys in Dean Ed's office lock, she leans against the door, which opens. Heh. Inside, she checks through the filing cabinets in search of the owner of the email address from which her paper was posted, but suddenly, Dean Ed enters the office. Veronica nervously covers with a "Dean O'Dell! I'm so glad you're here!" Given that it's Ed Begley Jr., I am stunned to find myself in a position of agreement.
Dean Ed gives Veronica an appraising look as he turns on the light. Veronica casts about for a story and quickly tells Dean Ed that she lost an earring at the meeting, and she wanted to find it before anyone came in and vacuumed. She plays the jewelry distress convincingly enough that Dean Ed tells her to go ahead and search away. But given that she goes back into the file cabinet as soon as he heads into his private office, he might have wanted to be a little more specific. He calls in and asks if Veronica follows boxing, and it's kind of cool of him not to assume she wouldn't be interested just because she's a girl. Veronica, though, says she only follows sports that are done to music, and even though she references it later, I'm guessing "Eye of the Tiger" doesn't count. Veronica joins Dean Ed, who's munching away on microwave popcorn, and asks if he wouldn't be more comfortable watching it at home. Dean Ed says his wife is against the whole thing, "the Scotch, the cigars, the televised violence." This explains why we didn't actually get to see anyone ripping the marrow straight out of her ex-husband's bones. Dean Ed goes on that he sneaks in the boxing viewing whenever his wife has a charity function, work function, "whatever other functions modern women seem to have all the time." Just be glad she's not working at the noir festival. Veronica -- confident that Dean Ed's attention is fully on the TV -- goes back to her file invasion as Dean Ed calls to her that she shouldn't say anything to his wife, because there are things she doesn't need to know. Veronica, not looking up from writing something on a Post-It: "Absolutely!" Hee.
Wallace's professor, who's certainly not dragging down the looks quotient of the male faculty at Hearst, sees Wallace come in, and asks what's up. Wallace declares his intention to take a zero on the last test and to stay in the class with the goal of getting a C or better on the remaining tests, which would earn him a passing grade. The professor hands him some assignment with an encouraging smile.
Cut to Wallace not wasting any time; he's studying in the library, when Veronica finds him. She tells him that the "Rory Finch" that supposedly posted her paper online has never actually been the name of a Hearst student, and what's more, the account was set up only three days earlier from an IP address she traced back to the Neptune Grand. Wallace points out that what she's learned is enough to clear her, but Veronica's all, "Have we met?" She encourages him to study via the "Eye of the Tiger" reference to which I alluded earlier, and leaves. As scenes that are completely pointless other than to catch the audience up go, that one was pretty good.
Wallace returns to his room to find Piz all psyched about the bowling until Wallace, with no small amount of amusement, bails on him. Piz tells him he's got to go, because if he doesn't -- "It's gonna look like you asked her out," Wallace finishes. He's already getting smarter. He finishes, "Yeah, that sounds awkward. But it's not my problem -- this [pointing to his textbook] is."
Veronica arrives home and Keith is on the phone going over the film festival guide with Harmony. Harmony tells him that she's got a conference at the Neptune Grand, so she can't make it on the night he suggested. "But I'd like to do something else." I think we're well aware of that, thanks. When Keith is off the phone, Veronica asks him for his opinion on her bowling wardrobe, prompting him to ask, "When did crappy old shirts with stupid stuff on them become cool?" I think it's been a while, if the "Keep On Truckin'" t-shirt I had as a kid is any indication. Veronica notes the festival guide, and Keith mentions Harmony. Veronica: "Harmony? 'Harmony with the husband who isn't cheating' Harmony?" That's one of the more diplomatic ways of referring to her. Veronica bluntly points out that he's going on a date with a married woman, but at Keith's disingenuous denials, Veronica wisely bails. Perhaps to hit IMDb and find out if Erica Gimpel might be showing up at some point to bring Keith to his senses.
Veronica enters Logan's suite, and after a kiss and a quick mention of her "Moose-tastic" shirt (I totally want one, by the way), she asks him if he has anyone at the Grand he could ask for a favor.
Cut to "Tina," a pretty blonde working the front desk. Veronica notes that this is Logan's "pal," but does so pretty good-naturedly. Tina finishes with some random and comes over to Logan and Veronica. Logan introduces the girls, and then asks if a "Rory Finch" might have been registered there. Tina looks up the name, and tells them that he did spend one night there a week earlier, on top of a few other one-night stays over the last couple of months. However, Finch only left a P.O. Box for an address, and paid in cash. Veronica asks Tina is she would call her if Finch were to check back in, and Tina agrees with an "Any friend of Logan's." Veronica makes a small show of saying that she's Logan's girlfriend, and everyone laughs as Tina tries to reconcile that revelation with all those times Weevil and Logan didn't realize they were being caught on the security camera.
Bowling! Veronica finds Piz, and they talk shirts for a moment until Logan sidles up to Veronica. Piz stammers for a second, so Logan smoothly cuts in, "Logan. Her boyfriend. We met." Heh. Poor Piz has to tell them that Wallace bailed, and can't even come up with an excuse about the fictional promised "gang," so it's looking Un!Comfortable! as awkward can be, until Parker's voice rings out -- she's decided to join them. Re-introductions are made, with Piz hilariously if understandably over-enthusiastically shaking Parker's hand. Parker asks where everyone is, causing Logan and Veronica, with perfect comic timing, to look at Piz. Hee. Piz takes it for a moment, but changes the subject to shoes. Logan takes Veronica's size, and then puts an arm around Piz. As they walk off-screen, he asks, "So, bowling! Is this something you do a lot? You and the gang?" Hee. He's so onto poor Beaverton. And while Piz may rightly be feeling a little overmatched here, he should take solace in the fact that Logan's gotten a lot nicer. Parker's bummed that Veronica invited her to go out for the first time since the rape "on some cheesy double-date setup with that Piz guy!" Well, hon, I'm not saying you should be ready or anything, but as setups go, you could do a lot worse. I mean, how does paintball with Rider Strong or experimental poetry with Horshack sound? Veronica swears that it's not a setup, so Parker concedes to stay, but promises, "This is not fun."
Cut to Parker whooping it up after nailing a strike. Hee. She crows that that makes "two-thirds of a turkey, bitches!" (A "turkey" in bowling is three consecutive strikes.) Parker high-fives Logan, who shakes out his hand afterward. Hee, again. Piz and Veronica, for their parts, look dejected, even more so after Parker keeps up with the trash-talk. By the way, I assume Veronica suggested these teams to make Parker more comfortable. Logan asks if anyone wants refreshments. Piz: "Ten martinis." Hee. As Piz takes his turn, Parker apologizes for her earlier grumpiness, and says that it feels good to be out in the world. Just then, Piz gets a seven-ten split, and Parker razzes him some more. Piz looks like he wants to throw the ball at her, and he might as well -- he wouldn't be hurting his chances of picking up that spare any. Also, Piz is left-handed, should that ever be relevant. As Piz steps up for his second throw, Parker asks Veronica what his story is. Veronica defensively says that she has a boyfriend, and it's interesting to wonder whether she's now clear that Piz is into her, or if she's reacting to the fact that some part of her likes Piz. Parker, anyway, doesn't care -- she thinks Piz is cute, and asks Veronica to find out what Piz thinks of her. That seems a little immature, but we all saw what happened when Gia tried the more direct approach, so maybe a little buffering is for the best. Veronica, for her part, looks stunned, which will make more sense later.
Cut to Veronica flopping down on Logan's couch. In the background, Logan changes his shirt as Veronica complains about having to ask Piz about Parker. Veronica notes that Logan got an A on his test, and he tells her that Horshack got caught taking Rider Strong's test for him. Random mention of two characters we'll probably never see again, or something more sinister? I'm normally all for the sinister, but given the two characters in question, I'll happily take the former choice. There's a knock at the door, and Logan goes to get his food. The deliverer greets Logan as "Mr. Echolls," and VMVO tells us that Veronica recognizes the voice. She gets up to see that the Grand employee is her accuser, Jeff Ratner. Logan only regrets not having ordered some popcorn with his meal, because this is going to be good.
When we return, Veronica tells Logan that Ratner's the guy who's trying to get her kicked out of Landry's class, and wonders aloud at the coincidence of him working at the Grand. Logan, for his part, doesn't let that revelation stop him from uncovering his dinner and picking away. Heh. Ratner snits that he's been working at the Grand for two years, and Veronica's seen him tons of times, but never noticed because he's one of the little people, and she's too busy "lounging with Captain Moneybags." Well, Jeff, that doesn't quite seem fair. I mean, she probably ignored you just as hard when she was dating Duncan. On the other hand, Ratner probably knows he can afford to let loose, as he doesn't have to worry about losing Logan's generous tips. Ratner leaves, and Logan congratulates Veronica on spreading sunshine wherever she goes. Veronica: "That boy doesn't know it yet, but he's the living dead."
Wallace is lying drooling in his room, and his buzzing alarm is doing nothing to remedy that situation. However, Piz returns from the shower (in a robe, unfortunately for you viewers looking for some shirtless Beaverton) and yells at Wallace that if he's dead, as his roommate, he's entitled to all his stuff. Eh, I'd stick with what you've got, Piz. I know you're frustrated with the way things are going with Veronica at the moment, but at least you're in possession of something that resembles a subplot. Anyway, Wallace comes to a vague approximation of life, grabs his gym bag, and rushes out as Piz uses a tennis racquet to bonk Wallace's alarm clock into submission. Heh.
Wallace rushes onto the basketball court, and the coach, after a brief lecture about how he shouldn't stay out so late partying, tells him to suit up.
Veronica awkwardly enters Piz's office at the radio station as VMVO complains that in the eighth grade, she had to ask some guy if he liked her friend, and the guy and the friend never spoke again after that. I can't imagine how Veronica could have botched that errand quite that badly, which just gives me another reason to mourn the dearth of flashbacks this season. Piz gets off the phone, and Veronica thanks him for the bowling the other night. Piz asks if Logan had a good time, and sorry, Piz, but the "be nice to the boyfriend" strategy isn't going to work here. Unless you're willing to settle for a much taller, feyer prize. Anyway, Veronica uses the point that everyone had a good time to segue into talking about Parker, but she doesn't get far before she has to pause. "I'm sorry -- I'm having a traumatic stress flashback to the sixth grade." Hee. Veronica bravely plows through her unpleasant memories and tells Piz that Parker thought he was cool and cute, but Piz, nicely enough, says that Parker's not his type. Veronica's bummed to hear he has a type. Piz: "Yeah. And it's not her." As long as we're being subtle, Piz, why not invite Veronica to the noir festival?
Mech E. Wallace gets a B+ on a practice quiz, but he's not thrilled, as his face shows that he knows something's got to give.
Parker busts into the library and happily "informs" Veronica that Piz has a radio show, and suggests that they drop by, because it'll be fun. Veronica takes a moment to note, "Everybody's always saying that." Hee. I love the unlikely friendship of Veronica and Parker, though -- it exposes a side of Veronica that's fun and playful without trying to be cool. More, please.
Piz is wrapping up his show when he sees Veronica. I have to say that I hate that device where two people are clearly arriving somewhere together, but they come into a third character's view at separate times so we can see his individual reaction to each of them. This is the second time they've done that with Piz (and in addition to being contrived and annoying, this one is totally redundant -- we know he likes Veronica already). Cut it out. Anyway, of course Piz looks genuinely happy to see Veronica, and then all fake and uncomfortable when he sees Parker. He also, when he signed off, referred to himself as "The Piz," which really bugs. Because if you don't take the chance to go all out and adapt the "Nobody Beats The Wiz" theme song for your own personal use when such an opportunity is presented to you, what's the point of living?
Parker enters Piz's lair and compliments him on how cool the setup is. Piz throws Veronica a surreptitious glare, and Veronica covers with a "We were just in the neighborhood!" Parker goes on trying to engage a taciturn Piz, saying she could use pizza, when Mercer's voice cuts in, as he's chowing on some pizza as they speak. Turns out Mercer has a radio show right after Piz that he mentions while greeting Veronica by name and introducing himself to Parker. Piz consents to go along for a slice, but Parker, her demeanor completely changed, says that they have to run, and hustles Veronica out of there. When they're around the corner, Parker breathes that Mercer's cologne is burned into her brain -- from the night she was raped. She's not sure it was him, but she has a terrible vibe, and Veronica needs no further convincing...
...as Mercer's going to be busy for a couple of hours, and she's still got Weevil's keys. She invades Mercer's room, and, taking care not to leave any fingerprints, which is a nice touch (ooh, sorry), she searches until she finds, hidden away in a drawer, electric clippers. I wonder what odds I could get from Mercer that he's royally screwed at the moment. Also, this series of revelations makes me wonder whose show was playing on the college radio while Parker was being raped.
Sheriff's station. Lamb gets to his office door to see Veronica inside. They smile somewhat sarcastically at each other, and then Lamb announces to no one in particular, "Could someone let me know when some girl is in my office?" Lamb settles into his chair for some snarky banter, and he's unimpressed with Veronica's story until she reveals Mercer's name. Lamb gets serious as he tells her they found the stolen cash box from the casino robbery, and there were two vials of GHB therein, which was used on two of the rape victims. Interesting that it wasn't used on the other two -- it's my impression that serial criminals aren't known for varying their styles. Maybe there's more than one culprit?
Wallace goes to see his coach and tells him he's got this class that's kicking his ass, so he's going to take the rest of the semester off and return at midseason. Because I'm sure majoring in mechanical engineering will be a cakewalk once he gets that first-semester-freshman-year class out of the way. Seriously, I don't understand why Wallace has to commit to this class -- there's got to be a way for him to get the necessary credits for this major later on. Maybe the writers decided that having anyone be undeclared was just too big a risk after what happened to poor Judd Apatow. Anyway, the coach tells him he won't lose his scholarship (wow, he's getting break after break here), but he now doesn't have a chance of making starter this year. Wallace unhappily acknowledges that.
Veronica goes to see Tina ("Callas" is her surname), who hands her a card with an overly polite (I assume she's keeping up appearances, here) "There you are, miss." Veronica gives her a little conspiratorial smile, which I take to be her way of thanking Tina without drawing attention to her. She starts to head for the elevator, but sees Keith nearby. She goes up to talk to him, and is dismayed to quickly learn that he's getting drinks for him and a nearby Harmony. She gives Keith a quick and pointed lecture, but he tells her not to worry. Veronica: "I worry." She managed to make a very clear point there without being moralistic or judgmental. Liking her this week, happily.
Cut to Veronica knocking on the door to Room 906, which is opened by...Mindy O'Dell. Veronica quickly makes her apologies; even with all the bizarre experiences she's had in her short life, the idea that Dean Ed's young wife would have a reason to trump up a plagiarism charge against her is too much to wrap her head around. However, as she approaches the elevator, it opens up and Professor Landry appears carrying a bottle of booze. Geez, Landry, using your looks and position as a middle-aged faculty member to nail Mindy? Looks like maybe you've lifted a few of your ideas yourself. Landry warily greets Veronica, who tells him she must have gotten off on the wrong floor. Once she gets into the elevator, though, she calls, "Rory Finch?" The look on Landry's face suggests that Veronica's grades are going to change, but whether it's for the better or worse is a mystery to me. By the way, just to get it on the page, a lot of people remember how Chip got points last year for supposedly sleeping with the Dean's wife. I thought at the time he was just blowing smoke and wasn't to be taken seriously, especially since Veronica hasn't made mention of it since. But with this revelation...well, I thought I'd at least mention it.
Back in the lobby, Keith is telling Harmony that he should only have one drink if he wants to drive home. Harmony takes the ball and runs with it a lot farther than Keith perhaps intended, as she nervously and with no small amount of ambivalence tells him that she doesn't want to count regrets, and she got a room, in case Keith wanted to join her. Keith's eyes get a real deer-in-the-headlights look, which is particularly fitting, given how much attention he regularly pays to Harmony's rack. Harmony's mortified when she takes his expression to mean that she's misread his signals. However, Keith tells her he is interested -- he's just not sure if he'd regret going through with it more than not doing so. Harmony looks sad and very vulnerable as Keith gets up to go, and Laura San Giacomo is a hell of a lot better actress than I previously thought.
Keith, driving home, pulls out into an intersection to await a chance to turn, and then is blindsided by a pickup truck. I actually saw that coming, maybe not for any particular reason. It makes sense that Keith would be distracted, though, particularly by wondering exactly what deep shade of blue his balls have turned. The pickup driver gets out and discovers that Keith's airbags work, and goes to get help. Keith shakes his head at life's mysteries...
...and then he's barging into Harmony's room and passionately making out with her. A lot of posters were very disappointed in Keith's behavior, but I think you can't judge him too harshly. After all, the Just Shoot Me reunion was bound to bring some long-buried personality traits up to the surface. Seriously, though, it does seem somewhat out of character for Keith, especially given what he went through with Lianne, but...if this signals a return to some real noir, I can't say I'm opposed.
Back from the last break, Veronica, holding a pan full of scrambled eggs, calls Keith to breakfast. Getting no answer, she checks his room to find that his bed wasn't slept in. From the expression on her face, she doesn't jump to any conclusions, which is odd, because this is the first time this season she would actually have been correct.
Veronica goes to see Lucky Tim, and presents him with proof that the paper she supposedly copied was posted after she'd already turned hers in. Lucky Tim too easily says she's off the hook, and asks if she figured out who set her up. Veronica says that she can't prove it, but she's got a good idea through process of elimination. "Why did you do it?" Ooh, nice. She goes on that he could get into a lot of trouble, but he interrupts that he didn't do it, and she can't prove he did, although...for argument's sake, he could see where she would suspect him, because until she came along, he was Landry's protégé. "I got his drycleaning, ordered Chinese when we worked late." Well, I don't think one lunch means that Lucky Tim is necessarily getting replaced, but hopefully Veronica will at least take the lesson to keep an assortment of menus on hand. Lucky Tim goes on, "I was like you! What a professor -- smart, charming, such a great guy." Veronica doesn't need any help following along, as she says that Tim must have found out about the affair with Mindy. Tim adds that there were others before; the Mindy affair started recently. He finishes up by saying that hypothetically, someone in his position might have been motivated by the desire to help her, to show her who Landry really is. And I'm not sure I completely believe him, but I love this sort of dramatic reversal, where Veronica correctly suspected Tim, but for reasons that turned out to be very different from his actual motivations. Veronica snots that he shouldn't do her any more favors, not that I blame her for the attitude in this particular situation. He put her through a lot of consternation to make his point, and she had to expend quite a bit of time and energy to clear her name. On her way out, she observes that Lucky Tim has on his wall "the same kind of crazy press-clipping board every movie serial-killer keeps!" Tim smiles like he takes that as a compliment, which maybe isn't exactly the best way to change her opinion. He ruminates that the complete absence of semen and foreign hair on the victims makes you wonder. Veronica's attention is caught by something on the board, but she doesn't tell Tim what it is. Tim then asks if she really thought Ratner set her up. Veronica: "Oh, crap."
Cut to some Grand security personnel busting Ratner for having enough Grand toiletries in his trunk to start his own bed and breakfast. Might as well, kid -- at least in that intimate setting, you won't have to deal with all the snooty rich folk who can't remember you name.
Wallace's professor lectures, and Wallace seems happy that he's following along. Snore. Couldn't we at least watch him build a go-cart or something? Then he could crash it, and it would turn out someone tampered with it, and that could be the second mystery! Wait, what do you mean, I just spoiled everyone?
Veronica's just gotten a tray of food and is presumably heading to a table, when Dean Ed, sitting by himself, asks her to join him. That'll be sure to help with the whole teacher's pet image. He crustily tells her that he doesn't want people coming up to him with ideas on how to run the school. He confides, "I don't like college students." That's not exactly surprising, given that from what we've seen, his propensity to expel kids makes him look like the Roy Bean of the university set. Veronica asks why, then, he eats in the cafeteria, and he tells her that he loves the burgers, but Veronica shouldn't tell his wife. "There are some things she's better off not knowing." Given what we've seen this episode, I'm wondering whether that was part of their marriage vows. Veronica actually considers spilling the beans to Dean Ed, but chickens out. This is an awfully nice setup here, as her sympathy for Dean Ed is going to magnify her misgivings about what Keith is doing. Anyway, before she can consider the well-drawn parallels too much, Logan appears and urgently tells her that he needs to talk to her. They leave Dean Ed to his burger, and Logan, almost beside himself, tells Veronica that Lamb arrested Mercer for the rapes. Veronica looks around guiltily, but Logan goes on that Mercer didn't do it. Veronica asks him how he knows, and Logan tells her that he was with Mercer the night of the rape over the summer (presumably Nancy's). Veronica asks where, and what they were doing. Logan: "I can't tell you, okay? But you have to trust me. He's innocent." Veronica looks at Logan, wondering what this new "trust" word is all about, as we fade to black.
This is the first time the college universe has really felt full and rich to me. It bodes well for the rest of the season, I think. And with that, upcoming: Veronica and Logan fight, presumably over Mercer. It looks like Veronica gets drugged, and the rapist is all-too-chillingly nearby. Damn, it's been a while since a preview got my heart pumping! About time, CW promo department!