Episode Report Card Couch Baron: C+ | 68 USERS: A YOU GRADE IT Leave It To Beavil
By Couch Baron | Season 2 | Episode 22 | Aired on 05.08.2006
In a hurry? Read the recaplet for a nutshell description! Finished? Click here to close.So like, you guys? Remember how I used to start off every recaplet like that? Well, I got a little nostalgic, because I hadn't written a recaplet in what seems like forever, thanks to the FUCKING NETS. Okay. We pick up pretty much where we left off, as Haaron meets his adoring fans on the courthouse steps all "Ich bin ein Innocenter." The Marses look to distract themselves from their bitterness -- as the Mannings are offering twenty grand for The Woodman's capture -- so Veronica starts getting in touch with the kids who were on the Little League Sharks. Meanwhile, Vinnie Vanlowe was busted breaking into The Woodman's house, so he passes on The Woodman's financial records for a fifty-fifty split of the reward money. But before we move on, we enter another reality, as Veronica experiences what it would be like to graduate if Lilly had never died: Veronica and Wallace aren't friends, she and Logan are together, and Lilly's headed to Vassar. Not sure which are the positives and which are the negatives there. Back in Realityville, Keith heads out after The Woodman just after graduation. But missing graduation are Weevil, who gets arrested before receiving his diploma, and Wallace, who decides to head to Paris to try to meet up with Jackie. However, Jackie's in Brooklyn, and when Veronica tracks her down, Jackie goes to JFK and confesses to Wallace that she's not rich and she has a son, whom her mom had been raising. Jackie has to stay in New York, so she and Wallace can't be together. Keith catches The Woodman in Nevada, who tells Keith he didn't crash the bus, and this seems a lot truer when Veronica discovers that Beaver was on the Little League Sharks. Meanwhile, Beaver and Mac ditch the graduation party at the Neptune Grand and try to have sex, but Beaver's enormous, er, issues are a problem. While Mac's in the shower, Veronica texts her to warn her about Beaver, but Beaver intercepts the message, and, gun in hand, replies for Veronica to meet "her" on the roof. Veronica heads up, but meets Haaron on the way, as one good psycho deserves another. And for all the people who forgot the first time he confessed to Veronica that he killed Lilly, Haaron does so again, which is at least a nice bit of symmetry. On the roof, Beaver points his gun at Veronica and demands to know what she knows. In a flashback, we see that Marcos and Peter wanted to tell the truth about The Woodman molesting them, but Beaver didn't want the truth to come out, so he got explosives from Curly Moran, his dad's mechanic. Curly figured out that Beaver was the culprit, so Beaver, who knew about the Cervando/Fitzpatrick bad blood, convinced the PCHers that Curly blew up the bus. Then, he killed Curly and wrote Veronica's name on his palm as a distraction. And not only that, but Beaver got chlamydia from The Woodman, who we learned earlier in the episode was infected, and that he actually raped Veronica back in "A Trip To The Dentist." And, on top of that, Beaver had The Woodman's plane rigged to blow, which The Woodman and Keith are on now. Beaver detonates the bomb, but as Veronica grieves, she forwards a message to Logan, who happily enough, is sober. Logan comes to her rescue, and in the end, Veronica has a chance to kill Beaver, but backs away at Logan's entreaties. Beaver jumps off the roof to his death, and Veronica is left to tell Mac the sad news. Also, Clarence Wiedman shows up to execute Haaron, apparently at Duncan's behest. Wow. Wow. In the end, Logan is consoling Veronica (yes, kind of like that) when Keith turns up, alive (although The Woodman is dead). And Kendall inherits millions from Beaver's real estate bets against incorporation. She shows Keith something that causes him to ditch his trip to New York with Veronica. Maybe it's not exactly "who's at the door," but it's still pretty cool. We'll find out what she showed him next season...I hope. Want more? The full recap starts right below!
Well, here we are. Before I start, I'd like to thank Joe R for taking last week's recap off my hands at the eleventh hour (FUCKING NETS) and doing such a hilarious job with it. Since we pick up right where the last episode left off, though, I want to add a couple of thoughts. A lot of posters pointed out how preposterous the trial was, and I totally agree with them. I understand that the ultimate point was to create an O.J.-like scenario. I do. But saying "It's noir, baby" doesn't mean it's good noir. For me, the trial didn't work at all, simply because it was so procedurally unbalanced. You can make the commentary that the world is corrupt, but you have to at least go through the motions, or it's not a trial. For example, let's say, for a moment, we're in some faraway world where medical tests can be used to besmirch a witness's character. Ridiculous, yes, but let's go with it. But if you were the prosecutor, wouldn't you attempt to turn things around? I mean, if chlamydia can be called as a character witness, it's logical to think that a guy Haaron beat to a bloody pulp in front of Trina, Veronica, and Logan could too, right? Or any of the multitude of women with whom Haaron was known to have affairs? Where were all the tabloid stories? Mention of Lynn's suicide? What was the prosecution doing for the past year to prepare its case? I mean, if we're to conclude that the prosecutor and/or judge was in someone's pocket, we need something a bit more concrete, in my opinion. And are we really to think that Jake "YOU KILLED MY DAUGHTER!" Kane (who, remember, is "beloved" by Neptune) wouldn't have used all his power and influence to make sure the case against Haaron was as strong as possible? Frankly, with the slipshod way the trial was depicted, I'd rather not have seen it at all. Except, that is, for the acting, and let me just get this out of the way: Harry Hamlin has been fucking brilliant on this show from beginning to end, and I'm kind of sorry a chambermaid is currently cleaning his brains off a TV screen in the Neptune Grand. [SPOILER!]
Okay, speaking of the devil. Haaron appears on the courthouse steps to a media frenzy, as VMVO notes that now "truth and fiction are pretty much interchangeable." Funny that Veronica sounds so bitter -- I can think of ways in which that would really come in handy. That way, my Jake Gyllenhaal fanfic would suddenly come true and...oh, whoops. Moving on. Haaron delightfully stammers how relieved he is to be free. Keith leads a still-about-to-chew-off-her-lip Veronica away, as Haaron gives a Nixon-style "V-for-Victory" sign, which is fitting, as he just basically spent a year saying that he wasn't a crook. His image goes still....