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It's a flashback episode, so since this is the nuts and bolts version, I'm going to give it to you in chronological order.
1864: Before she even turns him, Katherine teaches Damon the old play dead in the road trick for fun and profit -- or at least a warm meal. And that's even before they had cars. After she feeds, she asks Damon to kiss her on her bloody mouth, just to get a taste. When he refuses, she tells him he'll crave blood soon enough, so of course he immediately changes his mind and kisses her dripping maw. Later, they're in bed, when Emily interrupts because Katherine's got a visitor downstairs. It's her friend Pearl who reports that Honoria Fell has brought some elixir to the apothecary to sell on the cheap to all the townies. Pearl makes Katherine try it on her wrist. It burns! It's Vervain. They realize the humans know about vampires, but Katherine is Giuseppe Salvatore's guest and Pearl is Jonathan Gilbert's crush (despite the fact that she has a teenaged daughter -- ANNAbelle.) so these two day-walkers hope to avoid detection.
Stefan thinks he and Damon should try to win their father over to Katherine's side. Damon neither likes nor trust their father though, so he makes Stefan promise he won't. When Giuseppe tries to enlist his boys in the proto-F'n COW, he notices their lack of enthusiasm and later, Stefan starts talking about fair-play for vampires, so Dad spikes his drink with Vervain. When Katherine takes a bite out of Stefan in bed, she chokes and hisses the name of her poison. Father enters the room, and orders Stefan to get the Sheriff. Stefan tries to talk him out of it, but can't stand up to his father. They lead the drugged Katherine out in a Hannibal Lecter-ish mask, and throw in her the back of the police wagon. Stefan sees Pearl, Anna and Emily watching from their hiding place, but Pearl decides to get her horse and try to save Katherine. It's then that she runs into Jonathan Gilbert, who talks excitedly to her, until his ACTUAL VAMPIRE COMPASS points out that she's an ACTUAL VAMPIRE. She begs him for mercy, but he shoots her and has another Lecter mask slapped on her. Anna watches her mother get dragged away.
2010: Even though Stefan promised to help Damon get Emily's grimoire -- so that they can get the spell to free Katherine from the tomb beneath the church ruins, Damon doesn't know if he can trust his brother. He stays right up Stefan and Elena's asses as they hunt down the journal. He also makes himself at home at Gilbert Gables and gets to know Jenna who whispers to Elena that he's ridiculously hot. Elena, realizing Damon can use his bionic vamp hearing whispers back that he's an ass. That's not important to the story, but it was my favorite moment, so there you go. Anyhow, they find out from Jeremy that Alaric has Jonathan Gilbert's journal. Before Stefan goes to the school, Anna's already there. She stalks Alaric and gets the journal, right after he makes copies of it.
Alaric thinks Stefan was the one stalking him, and tries to shoot him with a homemade stake gun. Stefan gets him to stop the foolishness and they talk. He reveals his wife Isabel was a parapsychologist. Alaric saw Damon kill her, but when he happened on the scene, Damon disappeared and took Isabel's body with him, so Alaric doesn't know what happened to her. I wonder if she's as dead as all that. Anyhow, Stefan gets the photocopied journal pages from Alaric and when he reviews them with Elena, he realizes his father took Emily's grimoire with him to his grave. They go dig it up and get the book, but Damon has tracked down Anna in the meantime, thanks to the Germ, and forces her to let him see the original journal, so he shows up at the grave. When Stefan won't give him the grimoire, Damon chides himself for thinking for a second that he could ever trust Stefan, after the way Stefan broke his promise back in 1864 -- which I don't think he actually did -- but that'll keep 'til the weecap. Anyhow, Damon grabs Elena, and force-feeds her some of his blood. He'll turn her unless Stefan trades the grimoire for her life. Stefan does, of course.
Later, Stefan and Elena are at her house. He goes downstairs to get her some aspirin and talks to Jenna, and to Germ, who mentions that his friend Anna is there. At the mention of the name, Stefan flashes back to 1864 and remembers Pearl's daughter. He fairly flies upstairs to Elena's room, but she's gone and her bedroom window is wide open.
Meanwhile, Bonnie is out with Ben (who was turned by Anna and is kind of her boyfriend). Bonnie gets impulsive and kisses him, but when their lips meet, she realizes that he is a vampire. She tries to make like she's going to the ladies room (I don't know if she's going to flee or call Elena), but Ben's onto her, so he grabs her and takes her out into the night. Thanks to friendly date conversation, Ben knows Bonnie and Elena are BFFs, bonded to one another for life; they would do anything for each other. Poor Elena. Heroine one week; damsel the .
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Read diaries of some other famous vampires, then check back soon for Cindy's highly detailed weecap.
Want more? The full recap starts right below!Previously on The Vampire Diaries: Stefan? Century of secret. Elena? Spitting image of Katherine. Katherine? Fangy ho. Stefan to Damon: Ur luv wuz fake. Damon to Stefan: Our luv is so PUR!!!11. Journal? Jonathan Gilbert's. Grimoire? Emily Bennett's. Anna? Fangy TBD. Alaric? Hates Damon. Alaric: *gets in line* Stefan to Damon: I'll help u! Stefan to Elena: I totes pwnd Damon. Elena to Stefan: LOL. Cindy: OMGWTFBBQ, still not done with Lost recaps. Cindy: *dies*
Mystic Falls; 1864: Before she even turns him, Katherine teaches Damon the old play dead in the road trick for fun and profit -- or at least a warm meal. He lies in the road and pretends to be dead. Yes folks, he goes along with this, even while still human. When a horse-drawn carriage approaches, Katherine flags it down. The passenger scolds her that it's not safe to be out like that at night. Katherine vamps out. "No sir, it's not safe." She feeds on him and his driver and turns to Damon with a self-satisfied smile. "And that's how it's done." When Damon wants to know what happens with the bodies, Katherine shows she's right at home with her slot on the circle of life. "We'll take them into the woods and the other animals will finish them off." Damon seems to be struggling to keep his eyeballs in his head, but he so wants to please Katherine. When she asks if he's sure he's "ready for this," he says, "I'm ready; I want you to turn me." Because he's still human! She says, "When it's time." Then, still smeared with the blood of her victims, she tells Damon to kiss her. He takes out his handkerchief to wipe off her bloody face, but Katherine stops him. "You should get a taste." He tries, but can't bring himself to do it and backs off slightly with an, "I'm sorry." Katherine says, "Don't be. Soon, you won't be able to get enough." Damon's eyes travel from her eyes, to her mouth, and back up again, and then, steeling himself, he kisses her right on her dripping maw. Have I mentioned that HE IS STILL HUMAN? I gag until the title card appears.
Mystic Falls; Present Day (morning): Elena and Stefan snuggle in his bed and I wonder how foul vampire morning breath is, but before I start gagging again, Damon surprises them with a "Rise and shine, sleepyheads." I need help, I know, but I love the Evil Pixie Monster. Stefan and Elena wrap the sheets tightly around themselves and yell at Damon, who is sitting right on the bed. He smirks. "Oh, stop being smutty." Stefan sounds for all the world like a regular aggravated brother. "Seriously, get out of here!" Damon grins because (as is often the case) he gets to say the best line of the night: "If I see something I haven't seen before, I'll throw a dollar at it." That tickles me twice, because Elena is, as the Previouslies tell us week after week, a dead ringer for Katherine. Damon says they have lots to do, "Now that we're all friends and working toward a common goal." They've got to find the journal, which will help them find the grimoire, which should contain the spell for freeing Katherine from the tomb under the old church ruins. He puts Elena on journal-location duty, since she's a Gilbert as was Jonathan. Stefan brings up the grimoire, and because she's never watched or read any stories in the fantasy genre, Elena asks what that is. Damon: "It's a witch's cookbook." Stefan: some long technical blah blah about spell documentation. Damon: "Yeah. Cookbook." Stefan wonders who Humpty Dumpty was working for, since he seemed too dim to have been heading the underground Free-Katherine Project. Damon notes it's to their disadvantage that they don't know, and claps sharply to get them up and at 'em. "Chop chop." Before he's all the way out of the room, he turns back to Elena and Stefan. "You know, I really like this whole menage a threesome team-thing. It's got a bit of a kink to it. Don't screw it up!" So mote it be.
After Damon leaves them in peace, Elena starts to say something about him to Stefan, but Stefan points to his ear -- to remind her about bionic vampire hearing. She resigns herself to their near lack of privacy, but when Stefan starts to get out of bed, she pulls him back down. When he tells her they shouldn't, she shushes him and points to her own ear. And you know, I believe Elena loves Stefan, but a little bit of me can't help thinking that a little bit of her is initiating this encounter not just because of her love, but because she wants to make Damon squirm. And if that's the case, you go, girl! They disappear under the sheets, with wordless sounds of enthusiasm. The lighting changes and we're in a...
1864: MYTHOLOGY MOMENT: Vampires can be ticklish. This mythology moment is brought to you by Damon, Katherine and her beautiful corset. They're in bed fooling around, and when she tells him to stop tickling her, he challenges her. "Make me." So she straddles him and vamps out. He looks at her in wide-eyed wonder and caresses her vein-y face, but soon there's a knock on the door. It's Emily Bennett, interrupting them to announce that a "Miss Pearl," is there to see Katherine. Katherine might be an evil blood-sucking fiend and a slave owner, but she must use a lighter hand in her second appalling role than in her first, because Emily does not bother to act deferential; she doesn't try to hide her awareness, amusement and delight that Katherine is bedding a Salvatore son in their father's home. After a few, Katherine (now dressed) greets Pearl (Kelly Hu), who immediately suggests they talk outside. Katherine asks Emily to tell Mr. Salvatore that she's stepped away. Emily smirks. "Which one?" Katherine returns the smirk. "Both." Emily nods knowingly and heads upstairs. Naughty, naughty, naughty.
Outside, Pearl reminds Katherine that people talk and it's clear she's carrying on with both Salvatore boys. She wants to know how long Katherine plans on staying in town. "It doesn't... help the situation." Katherine says that as far as anyone knows, she's an orphan from Atlanta who lost her family in the fires. Pearl says, "A match you lit, no doubt." She then interrupts Katherine's laughter to address her daughter who is approaching a horse. "Honey, please be careful." Just to torture us (because we already know she must be Anna), the daughter doesn't turn around. Pearl then informs Katherine that Honoria Fell has brought some elixir to the apothecary to sell on the cheap to all the townies. Pearl makes Katherine try it on her wrist. It burns! Awesome. I think I like you, Pearl. You should have told her to put it on her face. The two decide the humans know about vampires and are trying to find them. Although Katherine thinks the Vervain is inconvenient, she doesn't want to move on yet. She likes it here, because duh... she's bedding both Brothers Salvatore. Just then, they're interrupted by Pearl's daughter. She is Anna (Malese Jow), like we knew she would be. And we cut to...
Mystic Falls; Present Day: Anna leaves Jeremy a message and asks him to meet her at the Grill later. When she hangs up, Ben (Sean Faris) comes out of the bathroom in a towel. Methinks the show is making up for a startling lack of Pudding Pop (and methinks it's doing a bang-up job). Ben asks if she's into the Germ. Anna tells him to get over it; she needs Jeremy for something. Just then, Ben opens the curtain and gets scorched by the sunlight, so we can know for certain that he's a baby vamp. Anna gives him some bottled blood, because they can't hunt until they get the tomb open, and she's afraid Bonnie will sense his appetites if they're not sated. He's to stay focused on Bonnie while she tries to get the journal back from Alaric. Ben, who looks like he's fallen for Anna, asks why she chose him. She's frank. "I needed someone in a position to be my eyes and ears: small town bartender fit the bill." He says there are plenty from which to choose. "Why me?" Anna shakes her head. "You were... sad, Ben. You lacked purpose; you needed me." Ben thinks on that for a moment, to give us time to appreciate his pecs. *appreciates*
Gilbert Gables: As Stefan and Elena dig through a box full of family mementos, she asks if Damon really believes they want to help. Stefan says Damon probably doesn't know what to think; trust doesn't come naturally to him. Elena imagines that Damon probably thinks everything he's done, he's done for love. She thinks it's sad. I think it's sad that the writers had to tell us that, when they could have shown us, but they've been so very awesome lately, I'll let it go. Stefan is the exposition fairy here, so he moralizes that there are ways to get what you want other than killing people. Hmmm, I'll have to try that. "Damon has no regard for human life; he enjoys inflicting pain on others." That was for the people who just tuned in. Welcome, newcomers! Stefan tells Elena that every time he's trusted Damon over the past 145 years, Damon's done something to make him regret it, and that regardless of his promises, if that tomb is opened, a lot of people will die. Stefan then notices the old picture Elena is holding and informs her that it's Jonathan Gilbert. She points to some contraption in the box that looks like a primitive attempt at a catcher's mask and asks what it is. Stefan leans back from it and is spared from answering when Jeremy walks in the room. Elena asks him where the journal is. Germ tells them Alaric has it. So we cut to...
MFHS: Alaric reads Jonathan Gilbert's journal: I met Barnett and Giuseppe, this evening. I saw the skepticism in their eyes when I showed them the compass. We cut to...
Mystic Falls; 1864: Giuseppe (Salvatore; James Remar) can't believe a compass can track vampires. Barnett (Lockwood; Ric Reitz) says, "What is it -- magic?" Jonathan Gilbert (Joe Knezevich) scowls. "It's science." Barnett scowls right back at him. He'll believe it when he sees it. No you won't, Barnett. It really is an ACTUAL VAMPIRE COMPASS! No one can believe it. No one. Giuseppe interrupts their pissing match and tries to get them to discuss, "this church idea," but he's interrupted by Stefan, whose only purpose in this scene is to let us know who Giuseppe and Barnett are, and I've already done that, so why am I typing about this when I still have to finish the Lost recaps? I don't know, either. After Stefan bows out, the men get on Giuseppe to inform his sons and enlist them in the Anti-Vamp Crusade. Giuseppe says they can count on both his boys. Being a parent sucks, sometimes, especially when you totally misjudge your sprog.
MFHS; Present Day: Alaric photocopies Jonathan's journal. I cheer his common sense, while my husband grumbles about that not being good for such an old, fragile document, and he's neither librarian nor archivist, so I don't know why the hell he cares, so let's move on, shall we? Alaric then wisely locks up the photocopies in his locker. More common sense. But hark, upon my sense comes a fierce hubbub, which would make me fear, could I be frightened. 'Tis Anna, who is lurking around the hallways like a thing that lurks, which is what she is. Alaric heads back to his classroom and throws the journal down on the desk. He's looking down when a figure silently zips past his door, but it catches his eye. He comes out into the hall and yells "Hello" and asks if there's anyone there. Anna hides in the shadows, watching him. He then stomps off to his locker and grabs a gun of some sort. He heads into his classroom and shoots a big honking stake at the trespasser -- who catches it, because that trespasser is Stefan Salvatore -- scariest vampire in Mystic Falls. Commercial.
After the break, Stefan, who is standing by Alaric's desk, seems to be suppressing a smirk as Alaric loads another stake into the gun. But then, Stefan pulls a Stealth-Salvatore, such that he is standing right behind Alaric in the entryway. He calmly says, "You shouldn't have done that," and then throws Alaric to the floor. On his way down, Alaric takes out a couple of desks. Stefan strolls toward him as he rises to his feet. "Have a seat." Alaric reluctantly sinks into a chair and waits for the worst to come. Stefan examines the nifty shotgun. "What is this? Compressed air?" Oh man, he's a scary sonuvabitch. He went from calm to violent to icy to bemused in about 30 seconds and he's not yet done. "Did you make it yourself?" Alaric is speechless so Stefan asks him who he is. When Alaric still doesn't answer, Stefan reassures him, even as he warns him again. "I'm not going to hurt you... unless you try that again." As a sign of good faith, he hands the gun back to a shocked Alaric and asks him again who he is. Alaric, who undoubtedly needs fresh undies by now, says, "I'm a teacher." When Stefan asks if they're going to have to do this the hard way, Alaric says he's also a historian and he made a few discoveries about Virginia during his research. Stefan says, "So you show up like Van Helsing," and basically tells him to cut the crap, so he does. His wife was a parapsychologist who spent her life researching activity in the area; she was killed by a vampire, and her work led Alaric to Mystic Falls. Stefan asks where Jonathan Gilbert's journal is. Alaric says it's on his desk. Stefan says, "No, it's not." Alaric looks over and says that it was. We cut to...
Anna's Place: she can make neither heads nor tails out of Gilbert's writings and tells Ben that some people shouldn't journal. Oh honey, I see you've been perusing Fandom Wank. She says, "Don't you have a date?" Ben does -- with our Bonnie -- so he leans in for a kiss goodbye, but Ben dear, Anna's into the journal and she's just not that into you. She pushes him away. We hear Jonathan Gilbert's voice: "I saw her again today, the most beautiful woman in town, with a name just as pretty: Pearl." Oh, no wonder Anna was transfixed. We cut to...
1864: Pearl is still trying to encourage Katherine to cut and run, but Katherine has a couple of things left to do. Pearl knows that means she intends to turn the Brothers Salvatore. She cautions Katherine, who promises she'll be careful. Anna and Emily sit idly by -- listening. When Jonathan Gilbert shows, Katherine pinches Pearl's cheeks so they'll be appealingly pink. Gilbert requests Pearl's presence outside. She seems into him too, and asks him to explain the comet "in the sky" as opposed to the gutter, I guess. Once they're outside, Katherine leans in toward Anna and smiles salaciously. "Your mother has an admirer." Anna and Emily share an equally joyful but less loaded look.
Meanwhile, over at the Salvatore homestead, Papa walks with his boys and says that the town leaders expect to be able to count on them -- descendants of a founding family. Stefan confirms that they can. Father -- right in front of Damon, mind you -- says, "I'm not sure that your brother, Damon, understands the importance of duty." Damon's neck nearly snaps as he turns to face his father. How he refrains from saying, "Standing right here. Standing right exactly here," I'll never know. Stefan too, following his father's lead, speaks as if Damon isn't there, and reminds their father that Damon left the Confederacy on principle. It's his choice, and should be respected. Papa says, "You'll forgive me if I have trouble respecting a deserter." Me: Is the desire to shag Katherine a principle, Stefan? Damon: "I never asked for your respect." Papa: "Good for you, Damon, because all I have is disappointment." They face off, and Damon tries to out-sneer Daddy Damndest, so Stefan changes the subject, asking what father meant about the town being in trouble. The father says there have been too many deaths and it's time to fight back. "Vampires -- they exist and they live amongst us, but we have a plan to kill them, and you're going to help us."
Gilbert Gables: Damon prepares dinner while Jenna swills wine and watches with great appreciation. My kinda gal. Ian Somerhalder's Damon is, I think, like James Marsters' Spike. As they'd say at Buffistas.org Damon has the BBoC factor: "If they told James Marsters that his new love interest was a cement block, he would have chemistry with the cement block. We would all be Spike/Cement Block shippers, and there would be a S/CB fic list, and whenever JM looked at the block just so, we would all post things like, 'Whoa, Cement Block looked hot tonight'. We leapt on the phrase with glee. 'The BBoC factor' is a reference to the fact that James Marsters can generate chemistry with anything. Even Riley." Not that Jenna is a BBoC (or, heaven forfend -- a Riley); she has plenty of spark on her own. It's just that Ian has this way about him that lights his counterparts in the most flattering candlelight. Anyhow, he tells Jenna about how his father never approved of his girlfriends and asks Jenna about herself and if Logan is still missing. She tells him that the overly entitled Logan is in the Bahamas, working on his tan. "He's a Fell. They're all snooty." Damon laughs and pours Jenna another (largely unnecessary) drink, and then greets Elena. He asks if Stefan's with her. Elena's brow furrow as she answers that he'll be there, soon.
MFHS: Stefan asks how long Alaric has been aware of him. Alaric admits it was just recently. Alaric also admits he saw Damon kill his wife. With neither remorse nor sympathy, Stefan "Scary-Ass" Salvatore says, "If you're here for revenge, this is going to end very badly for you." Alaric says he just wants to find out what happened to his wife. When he happened upon the scene of her demise, Damon disappeared, as did Isabel's body, so Alaric doesn't know what happened to her. Ooh, ooh, pick me. I think I know. Stefan cautions Alaric that Damon can never know why he's in town. "He'll kill you without blinking." Alaric says he can take care of himself, but Stefan replies, "No, you can't. I can help you -- if you'll let me."
Mossy Manse: Damon intentionally rubs up against Elena when they pass one another in the kitchen. He pretends like it was an accident, but Elena calls him on his crap. Reason 543 why I'm loving this show. He changes the subject to Stefan's absence. "Where is he? He's missing family night, which I am enjoying -- immensely." And you know what? He is. No, no, I'm not sitting on the magical toadstool, but seriously, if Damon had some of this, rather than Daddy Damndest, he might not be such a sociopath. When Elena ignores his question, Damon gets right to the heart of the matter and asks if Stefan's renewed sense of brotherhood is for real. "Can I trust him?" Elena's as bad a liar as Jenna is a guardian, but she tries her best and says he can. Damon Stealth-Salvatores her and asks again: "Can I trust him?" Elena says, "I'm wearing Vervain, Damon, it's not going to work." Offended, Damon scrunches up his face. "I'm not compelling you. I just want you to answer me... honestly." Elena looks him in the eye: "Of course you can." She looks away too soon, leaving Damon to wonder.
1864: Katherine is playing croquet with Papa Salvatore -- assuring him that he can trust her as she would never cheat. Stefan wants to come clean with their father and go to him for help. "He could help us keep her safe." Damon accuses Stefan of going mad. "No, no. Father would drive a stake in her himself." Stefan maintains they can trust him. Damon says, "No, not with this. Promise me you won't tell him, Stefan." Stefan promises.
Gilbert Gables: Damon tells Elena that there was a time he would have trusted with Stefan with anything. Elena reminds him that trust breeds trust. Damon just wants Katherine back. "I'm sure you can understand that." Elena says, "I can understand that you would do anything for her -- yes." Damon says, "Then you understand what I will do if anyone gets in my way." Elena sighs and we cut to commercial.
Damon plays video games with Jeremy, who is dodging calls from Anna. When Damon asks if she's hot, Jeremy says she is, "But she can be weird." Contrary to Barney Stinson's theory, Damon says, "Hot trumps weird, trrr-rust me." Out in the kitchen, Jenna whispers to Elena that Damon is ridiculously hot. Elena, realizing Damon is probably listening with his bionic vamp hearing, whispers back that he's an ass. In the living room, with his back to the ladies, Damon rolls his eyes. Back in the kitchen, Jenna asks why Elena is going through all the family mementos. Elena lies that she thought there might something about her birth parents. Jenna asks if Elena has told Jeremy -- because Elena's the true adult in the house, after all. Elena says she hasn't -- but she will. And, allow me to interrupt myself here, but I've seen a lot online about how Jenna is dating Alaric and yet flirting up a storm with Damon. And honestly, Scott voiced the same complaint when we first watched the episode, but I don't have a problem with it. She's not a teenager -- so every date isn't a commitment, and as far as we know, they haven't yet had their Friday Night Dinner & a Movie date, yet. But even if they have -- that would seem to me to be a date, not dating, and certainly not an engagement. It's not like she was screwing Damon's brains out in the laundry room -- and even if she was -- it's not like she and Alaric are married or even committed. Jenna doesn't know what Damon is. And he's so very pretty. I cut her total slack on her wine-fueled flirtation. So, and in conclusion? There. ANYhow, the doorbell rings. It's Stefan. Damon races Elena to the door, and when they open it, he stares at his brother and asks, "Well?"
Bonnie's Karaoke Date: Ben apologizes for his inability to sing. Bonnie says it's just a mistake to perform Metallica karaoke. Amen. They flirt back and forth and when he mentions a "time" Bonnie subtly calls him on that. Ben nods and smiles. "Yeah." Bonnie smiles back, but she can't hold his gaze, because she's blushing. Oh, poor dear. Ben then asks her what her friends are up to. When Bonnie mentions Elena, he is far too interested, but Bonnie doesn't catch that, so she discloses too much. "Yeah, she's my best friend. [...] Elena and I are bonded for life. I can't imagine it any other way. [...] She's my... sister. I mean, I'd die for her." Ben drinks his coffee with an air of satisfaction.
Gilbert Gables; Front Porch:
Damon confabs with Elena and Stefan and says he thinks the teacher has journal. "There's something really off about him." Stefan blends lies with the truth. "He doesn't know anything. Somebody got to it, right before me." They wonder who else could know and then Damon catches sight of the Germ through the blinds. Elena tells him to leave her brother out of it, but her pleas fall on deaf ears. Inside, Damon weasels information out of Jeremy. Anna is hyper-interested in the journal (too) and wants to meet him at the Grill, tonight. But while Germ is revealing that, Elena is answering a phone call from Bonnie. Anyhow, Damon encourages Jeremy to meet her there and offers to drive. Meanwhile, on the phone, Bonnie is telling Elena what a perfect gentleman Ben is. She just wants to plant a kiss on him. Elena tells her to go for it. Bonnie says she's a chicken, but she'll text Elena with an update. When they terminate their call, Stefan updates Elena on Jeremy and Damon's trip to the Grill. Elena panics that Damon will get the journal before they do, but Stefan whips out his photocopy, He says Alaric wasn't exactly kind enough to loan it, but... "I got it."The Grill: Anna greets Jeremy who admits he kind of missed his daily dose of cute stalker chick. Meanwhile, Damon's eyes damn-near fall out of his head when he gets a load of Anna's face. We flash back to...
1864; Mystic Falls Apothecary: Pearl updates Katherine -- the sheriff was there earlier, and bought large quantities of the Vervain elixir. Damon is shocked that the women can be so calm, but Elena says, "We're the respectable ladies of Mystic Falls. Thanks to Emily, we walk the streets in daylight. No one will ever suspect us." Ah, so Emily is the source of the day-walking bling. Thanks for the confirmation, Show. Pearl eyes Damon pointedly as she says, "Not unless a human tells them." Damon says he'd sooner die. Katherine adds, "And soon enough -- you will." Anna announces that Mrs. Fell is approaching, so they break off their smooch. Pearl adds, "Thank you, Annabelle." Commercial.
Elena and Stefan pore over Jonathan Gilbert's journal. Elena reads: "The Fell family believed it should be I, not them, who protected the witch's spellbook, but I feared she would haunt me from the hereafter. They mocked my fear, but it was Giuseppe Salvatore who..." Elena pauses. "Is that your father?" Stefan confirms it is and takes over. "It was Giuseppe Salvatore who removed my fear. He told me he would protect the secret of the spellbook. He said he would carry it to his grave." We flash back to...
1864: Giuseppe is writing in his journal, but when Stefan comes to talk to him, he puts it aside and brushes of the significance of his scribblings. "I will carry the real secret with me..." Stefan finishes for him: "To your grave." Guiseppe nods. "And a full grave it will be." Stefan is there, because what if... like... Vampires are people too? What if some are fluffy bunnies? And Dad, didn't you -- Son of the Confederacy -- teach us not to take what others say at face value. "You always taught us so differently." Papa's all -- these are deadly, seductive demons! "Those who stand with them -- those who bring shame to their families -- will be destroyed as well." He pours Stefan a drink. We flash forward to...
Gilbert Gables: Stefan looks at Elena. "I know where it is!" We do too, doofus. It was pretty evident after all that "to my grave" falderol.
Anna's Place: Damon sneaks up on her and chokes her. His equal in strength, Anna chokes him right back. Finally, he calls her off, and they both drop their hands. Anna glares at him. "I was wondering how long it would take you to find me." I know, right?
Giuseppe Salvatore's Grave: Elena asks Stefan why his dad isn't buried in the family tomb. Stefan explains that it hadn't yet been built. Does anyone else suspect the set-designers and writers forgot, and had to scramble at the last second? Stefan's as sure as he can be that the grimoire is in the grave with Giuseppe. By torchlight, they dig it up. Stefan tries to let Elena beg off, but she doesn't want Katherine's tomb opened any more than he does, because that will totally cramp her style, y'all, so she's ready to help. When Stefan lets out a big sigh, it dawns on Elena how difficult it must be for Stefan to dig up the remains of his own dad. With that, we flash back to...
1864: Katherine is playing with an amber crystal that looks awfully familiar, but it's the cameo around her neck that Stefan is asking about. Katherine says it's a gift from Emily. Is that her day-walker bling? She wonders when Stefan will stop worrying about Damon. Stefan wants Katherine to himself. Katherine says she's spoiled, selfish, and is the one who gets to make all the rules. She kisses her way up his bare chest (bless) and then latches onto his shoulder as he moans in pleasure. Suddenly, Katherine raises her head. Blood still dripping from her lip, she groans, "Vervain," and falls to the floor. Stefan (bite mark on his shoulder) doesn't know what all is up, so to add to his confusion, his father bursts in and tells him to go get the sheriff; they have a vampire and nothing Stefan feels for her is real. He fed Stefan Vervain to expose her, because his suspicion was piqued when Stefan showed sympathy for the vampires' plight. "I didn't raise my sons to be so weak.... The sheriff -- now. Go, quickly. Now, son." And Stefan? He frigging goes.
Mystic Falls; Present (night); Giuseppe's Grave: Stefan and Elena dig away. Commercial.
Anna's Place (which looks like a motel room): Anna tells Damon she arrived, "Around half-past comet," and has been watching Damon screw up every step of the way. She has let others do her work. Damon asks if that means people like Logan Fell. "Little bastard shot me." Anna says Logan was being such a poseur-slayer with the ACTUAL VAMPIRE COMPASS that they slipped him some blood because she couldn't let him die when she needed his family's journal. She thought it would contain the location of Emily's grimoire. She then shows him Jonathan Gilbert's journal and says he should help her find the grimoire, because they both want the tomb open. Damon skims the journal until he finds what he needs, and then closes it and wraps the bindings around it. "Sorry. I work alone."
Bonnie's Karaoke Date: Ben has paid the check and asks Bonnie what she'd like to do now. She grabs his face and lays a big kiss on him, but the sound fx guys let us know he gives her the heebie jeebies. When he asks what's wrong, Bonnie lies, "Nothing," but we don't believe her -- neither does Ben. She does her best to cover though, and says she should have waited until the end of the night to kiss him. When she adds that she's tired, Ben assumes she wants to go, but she suggests they stay, load up on coffee and then go out and do something crazy. When Ben asks, "Like what?" Bonnie flirts at him: "Like anything." She then takes off her coat and says she's headed to the rest room. She walks off and to the (our) right, but when she's confident that Ben's not looking, she reverses direction. I have no idea where she intended to go or why she didn't just frigging call Elena and I'm a little annoyed, so we'll move right along. As she goes wherever, Ben vamps out, Stealth-Salvatores her, covers her mouth, and drags her off.
Grave: Stefan digs as Elena stands around holding a shovel, a flashlight, and looking cute. Utterly tone-deaf tonight, she sighs and says, "Not many girls can say they've done this." Stefan must be completely whipped, because he just smiles sadly and gets back to his digging. Almost immediately, he scrapes against the casket lid. He clears it off and starts to open it, when Elena asks, "Is that it?" No, Elena. It's the Tootsie Roll center of a Tootsie Pop. Stefan's more gracious than I. He opens the lid without a word to reveal his father's skeleton. He removes the grimoire from his hands (hand bones?) and closes the lid.
The grimoire is encased in wax. Stefan cuts it off and opens the book. And just as he does, Damon's voice rings out through the black night. "Well, what do you know? This is an interesting turn of events." After a commercial break, Stefan doesn't bother to lie or otherwise cover, like a sane person might do. Oh, no. He just says, "I couldn't let you bring her back. I'm sorry." Damon's sorry that he thought for even a second that he could count on his own brother. Stefan points out that the only reason Damon could be there is that he found the journal and decided to do everything by himself. Damon's all: no dur. "The only one I can count on is me! You made sure of that, many years ago, Stefan." He looks from his brother to the woman who is a dead ringer for his lover. "But you... You had me fooled." Elena did? Really, Damon? I thought she totally sucked at lying. Damon doesn't want to get into that, now. Instead, he asks, "What are we going to do, now -- because if you try to destroy that -- I will rip her heart out." Stefan, forgetting who he's dealing with, says, "You won't kill her." Damon Stealth-Salvatores his way to Elena's side and says, "I can do one better." He opens a vein and forces Elena to drink from his wrist. Gag. "Give me the book, Stefan, or I'm stabbing her neck, and you and I will have a vampire girlfriend." Hello? Does Elena not get any say in this? Okay, she and Damon do have mad chemistry and if she was suddenly footloose and moral-free, she'd probably be glad to do them both, but still -- presumptuous, much? Damon demands the book. Stefan insists on getting Elena back first, because an object for an object, right? That's totally in the Bible. When Damon says he can't trust that Stefan will give the book back to him, Stefan says, "You just did the one thing that ensures that I will." Damon buries his face in Elena's hair in a gesture that some people find sweet and others find creepy. Honestly, I think it's both. Finally, and with much tension, they make the exchange. Stefan caresses his object Elena, and then quickly takes her from that place, leaving Damon alone with the book and his memories. I hope he doesn't find his magical toadstool, because it's already taking every bit of strength I have not to woobify him.
1864: An angry torch-bearing mob marches on the Salvatore estate. Inside, Giuseppe locks Katherine inside a Hannibal Lecter-ish mask. That must be the primitive catcher's mitt we saw in Elena's family memento box. No wonder Stefan recoiled. Why didn't he just stake her? When Damon begs for the men not to take Katherine away, his father pushes him against the wall and warns him of the deadly consequences of being branded a sympathizer. Damon grabs his father's arms. "Then let me be killed." We cut to...
Mystic Falls; Present: Grimoire in hand, Damon looks down at his father's open grave with nothing but contempt. He leaves Stefan's torches burning and walks away. [Leaving an open grave of a Salvatore ancestor for anyone to see won't arouse any suspicion towards the brothers at all! I'm sure of it. -- Angel]
Gilbert Gables: Stefan and Elena are at her house. She wonders if the headache she has is from ingesting Damon's blood. Stefan gives her the non-answer that she'll be okay. "That was just a small amount of blood. It should pass out of your system by tomorrow." When she asks if he's okay, Stefan goes about flogging and punishing himself. "Damon was right. This is my fault."
1864: We flashback to the townsmen carrying Katherine out to the police wagon. Stefan stops Damon from outing himself and making a scene, and tells him he'll help. Damon throws him off. "Help me? Don't you think that you've done enough? You promised you wouldn't help him." Instead of saying, "I didn't help father," Stefan inexplicably says, "I didn't think this would happen." I throw up my hands in disgust. As the wagon drives away, Damon stands back and glares at his brother. "You did this. This is your fault." He runs off, leaving Stefan alone with his guilty conscience. I'm not sure how I feel about his reaction. I mean girlfriend is a stone-cold killer, but I'm not sure Stefan knew that back then. I don't know how far over him her thrall extended. On one hand, I think he didn't break his promise to Damon at all. On the other hand, I think he didn't break it soon enough. It seems I'm a three handed freak though, because I do think he was wrong to make the promise in the first place, particularly if he wasn't going to keep it.
Present Day: Stefan says he put his faith in his father, "But Damon put his faith in me, and I destroyed that. This is my fault." Elena assures him he did nothing wrong. "Don't forget that." Okay, forget what I said in the last paragraph. Yes, Stefan did something naive and telling -- by pleading the "hypothetically non-evil" vampire's case to his father, but he did not intentionally out Katherine to Papa Salvatore. He was just stupid and underestimated his dad. So while I can understand Damon's anger and Stefan's guilt, I don't think Judas needs to be worried about losing his exclusive circle in Dante's hell. Oh... wait. That said, the moron did run and get the sheriff, didn't he? But he was enthralled. And then Vervain-ed. Oh, hell's bells. I don't know what to think.
ANYhow, Stefan kisses Elena on her achey head and says he'll go downstairs and find her some aspirin. She flops on the bed as he descends the staircase and meets up with Jenna, who says, "You know you're not staying the night, right?" Um, Jenna -- I'm pretty sure this episode opened up with a morning after Elena spent the night at Stefan's. Furthermore, I'm pretty sure you turned a blind-eye when Vicki spent the night with Jeremy. Look, I'm a parent. This crap is hard. But pick a stance and stick with it, and half of your problems will disappear. Stefan's too polite to say any of that. He just says they're going hang. Jenna smiles. "You're lucky I like you. Keep the door open." Stefan says, "You've got it," and asks for some aspirin. While Jenna is looking for it, Jeremy walks into the room, greets Stefan and as a door closes he asks Jenna, "Oh hey, where'd she go?" Jenna says "she" went to the bathroom. Stefan asks who they're talking about. Jeremy says, "Anna." Stefan flashes back to...
1864: Anna looks on in horror as Katherine is hauled away. Her mother tells her to stay hidden and get Emily. "I'll get us out of here." As Pearl unties her horse, she's greeted by an eager Jonathan Gilbert. "Do you see all this? The town's gone mad running after all the demons." Pearl does her best to smile and nod, but then Jonathan's ACTUAL VAMPIRE COMPASS starts whirling and whirring like it's on overtime. It sputters and clicks until it stops -- and points right at Pearl. Jonathan looks at her in horror. "You?" Across the way, Emily and Anna hide in the bushes. Pearl begs for her life, but to no avail. Jonathan yells, "I've got another one, over here." Pearl tries to zoom away from him, but he shoots her, and by the way she falls, he's used wooden bullets. He slaps another Hannibal Lecter-ish mask on her, and has her dragged away. In the brush, Emily keeps her hand clasped over Anna's mouth, for her own good. "It'll be all right. You're going to see her again. I already know how to protect them. I'm going to protect them." Stefan looks from the horrible scene in front of him, over to the frightened, hiding women. We cut to...
Present Day: Stefan takes only a moment to realize the meaning of his memory. He zooms upstairs, and calls out Elena's name. But by the time he gets to her room, she's gone. Her window is left flapping in the breeze. And? Scene!
Well, that was quite the episode. I cannot commend the writers enough on their pacing. Nothing is rushed, but nothing is beaten into the ground, either. Every reveal leads to another, rather than a dead-end. That doesn't mean I don't have questions. I do. I was under the impression that Katherine sired Damon and Stefan. I'm now left wondering how and when that happened. I also wonder who turned Anna and when she was turned; that Pearl was worried about her safety around the horse seems to indicate she was still human during the events of this episode. I wonder if Pearl was evil, or if she was also a vegan vampire. I wonder why Emily was as loyal as she was to the local fang gang. I also wonder when Stefan and Damon are just going to kiss and make up. The thing is, I'm not sitting here all discouraged that I'll never get any satisfactory answers. In just a little more than a half a season, the writing staff has built up my faith in them to what is probably a ridiculous degree. I do think both Stefan and Damon are being a little hard on 1864 Stefan, and yet I do understand why. It isn't all sunshine and roses, though. Last week, I was so thrilled that Elena fought to save her own life, so it was a little disappointing to have both her and Bonnie turned into damsels in distress, this week. I'll hold further comments on that though, until I see what happens Thursday and my word, I can't wait until Thursday. Before I close, I just want to applaud Dobrev, Somerhalder, and Wesley for their impressive performances in their 1864 roles. Honestly kids, I didn't think you had it in you; I was so very wrong. I'm particularly impressed with Dobrev. Her Katherine is as bad as Elena is good. Kudos. up is "Fool Me Once." In the meantime, come on over to the forums, where we never, ever sing karaoke.
Cindy McLennan is out of things to say this week. Email her new things at CynthiaMcLennan[at]gmail.com, or follow her on Twitter.