Seattle: Dakota Street

MPDP appears clad in red jeans and a grey hooded sweatshirt. She's doing the intro from a fish market. She stops in front of a sign that says "Fat Crab." They're in Seattle. She remarks that the city's known for coffee, but it's their mutual oenophilia that's glued these two couples together. Okay, she doesn't actually say "oenophilia." We see a shot of Bob and Sandy and Chris and Kasey, having some red wine in a living room. MPDP adds that they spend a lot of time together helping each other with home-improvement projects. Back to the fish market: a fishmonger heaves a big fish at MPDP, who catches it and plops it on a scale. The "whale of a team" that will be featured in this episode is Vern, Laurie, and Ty, the last of whom is wearing, over a baseball cap, some sort of Alpine toque with little fake braids attached. Back to MPDP: Fishmonger A hurls another flounder (or whatever) over her head to Fishmonger B as MPDP squeals. After the inevitable remarks about "bigger fish to fry," we move on to the homeowners' neighbourhood.

We see a little blue sports car (a Porsche, I think -- I care about cars about as much as I care about sports) zipping around a curving street, and then Chris and Kasey are interviewed standing beside it in their driveway. Chris says that he thinks the most important changes would be to add colour and warmth, maybe reds or burgundy. The shot of the bedroom shows it has white walls, beige carpet, a white wooden garden bench, two narrow IKEA-esque pine chests of drawers, a wicker laundry hamper, and a large twig wreath on the wall above the bench. What I think must be their closet is covered with a sheer white curtain with a pattern of solid squares. It looks like the ceiling has recessed lights. The bed has a blue and white checkerboard quilt at the end and a blue coverlet. Chris wants to see some contrast and character. Chris says to Kasey that he knows she's not a big contrast person. She says she agrees with the need for colour. The shot shows the bed, which has no headboard but a few pillows stacked on it. There are tiny pine night tables on each side, with small black modern lamps, and two sconces just above each corner of the bed. Kasey would like dark, warm colours, and something simple: she doesn't like a lot of clutter. She wants a classy, elegant look, and says that "less is more."

Bob and Sandy's living room looks better than many of the "afters" I've seen on this show. It's maybe a bit blah but it's not hideous or anything. They've got a hardwood floor, walls that looks like a soft yellow colour (although it could be tan), a three-seater couch in a kind of brownish tweedy fabric placed opposite a window, and a matching love seat placed perpendicular to the three-seater. The love seat's opposite the fireplace, which is white with a red brick inset. Above the couch is a painting of pears in shades of green, mustard, and dark red. There's a tall reddish-brown wood armoire in the corner to the fireplace, and a small window in the corner of the wall perpendicular to the other side of the fireplace. Both windows have tab curtains in a neutral colour on them. There's a simple wooden coffee table. Away from the seating area and near the door, there's a large wine cabinet. Above the wine cabinet is a large mirror framed in gold. Bob says that they're not happy with the flow of the room, and mentions that the wine cabinet takes up a lot of space. Sandy says they like the colour of the walls, but they got a new painting this year that has a lot of colours in it that they like, and she thinks that maybe the yellows or burgundies of the painting could be incorporated. She feels the room is crowded and cramped and they'd like to see the furniture rearranged. Bob says that if things don't go well, "Chris would be very understanding; Kasey, on the other hand, might freak out a bit, but that's okay, we knew that going into this. We hope she'll handle it pretty well." So unless you're completely new to the way these shows are edited, you already know Kasey's not going to be happy. Back to Kasey, who's drying off the sports car with a plush towel: "I think that the four of us have such a great relationship that doing it together is what's the fun part."

Key swap. Neighbourhood's got a nice view of the water -- Puget Sound, I guess. Never been to Seattle.

Shot of Laurie perched on the white garden bench going over her notes and plans. Bob and Sandy bomb in and Laurie asks them for their ideas. Sandy describes it as a "white cave" and wants to warm up the room. Laurie agrees. Bob thinks they need to change the focal point of the room, maybe angle the bed, rearrange the furniture. Laurie agrees. She says they're going to build some partition walls and create an intimate "bed nook" with a separate seating area. She says that focal point will be a fabulous upholstered headboard, and that Chris and Kasey will also get the storage they've requested. The room doesn't seem lacking for storage; it's very neat and not at all cluttered. They'll be eighty-sixing the garden bench. They unload the room; for some reason, the furniture has to be taken out of a door that opens onto a deck (which I had previously taken for the closet door) and around the house and back in another door. I wonder why they couldn't go through the house.

Vern's casually reading a magazine on the couch. Kasey and Chris plop down and Vern says the room is incredible and they're pretty much done. He asks for a tour of a Seattle. They all have a chuckle over that, and then Vern asks their ideas. Chris wants to do something with the fireplace -- make it look bigger, maybe add some shelves on the side. Kasey wants to bring in some colours from the pear painting. Vern acknowledges that the painting is their prize possession. I don't think the painting's anything special, but they love it, so we'll go with that. Vern says they're going to be painting the walls and ceiling and the fireplace, and that there's a carpentry project that will replace the armoire and house the wine cabinet. They'll also be getting rid of the love seat and bringing in two new chairs. Vern warns them there's a lot of sewing to do. They unload the room. The wine cabinet -- which must weigh a ton between the refrigeration factor and the weight of a few dozen bottles -- is just covered with a dropcloth.

Laurie tells her team she's a little nervous. They all crouch down around the paint and Laurie asks them what they think Chris and Kasey want. Sandy says Kasey wants reds and burgundies. Laurie seems alarmed to hear it. It seems odd that she wouldn't already be aware of this, given the amount of information the designers are provided with in advance. Sandy says she wants "something dramatic." Whatever Laurie's got in that can, it's not red and dramatic.

We cut quickly to Vern, who's steeping a whack of tea bags in a pot on the stove. He's whipping up a batch of tea to use to stain the white canvas slipcover fabric. The tea will soften the look of the fabric, so it's not so stark. As we go to commercial, we get a replay of MPDP catching the fish.

MPDP arrives in the bedroom just in time for the paint reveal. She remarks that she sees the stress on everyone's faces although nothing's happened yet. Laurie says she's really nervous because she chose this colour and now everyone's saying "red." Or mustard. Laurie says she loves those colours and has used them quite a bit. MPDP agrees. I can't imagine why Laurie chose this house to abandon her typical palette, but she did. Laurie exposes the paint: it's an off-white she calls "parchment." It's not old parchment, either, which is fairly yellow; this is new parchment. Off-white with a hint of yellow. MPDP says it's beautiful. It is nice. Laurie laughs that the "white cave/igloo's going to an off-white cave/igloo!"

Vern and his team are working the fabric around in a large tub of tea on the floor. Kasey thinks it looks like the fabric will be a taupe colour; Chris thinks it will have a hint of yellow. Actually, I think it will end up just looking like natural, unbleached cotton. Vern tells them they talk like they're designers.

Laurie's painting, and says that Kasey apparently likes yellow, and that there is some "golden" in the paint. Um, barely. MPDP and Bob mock her.

Vern shows his team the other fabrics: two wool gabardines, one in dark gold and one in dark red. Those will be the drapes. There's also a silk fabric in a dark red with a gold pattern for accent pillows. Chris and Kasey really like the fabrics. I like the dark red shade a lot.

Laurie displays her fabrics. She tosses a bundle of cream fabric we can't see very well onto the floor, saying it's for a pillow. She holds up a scrap of a pale icy blue fabric which is for a bed throw. There's some cream fabric with a strong, sinuous pattern on it in black, which I quite like the look of, but she doesn't show it very clearly. Then she holds up yet another cream-coloured fabric with a tone-on-tone diamond pattern on it, which is for the headboard. I like that, too. I actually like the whole palette; it's interesting and different. But no one, including me, suspects that Kasey will like it.

Vern pours out some very warm yellow paint, saying that it will dry darker and more mellow than it looks now. Chris, being the tallest by a considerable amount, draws ceiling duty.

Bob tells Laurie that he thinks the fabric is beautiful, but that there's just no colour. Sandy thinks it's beautiful, too, and that she would be very happy if it were used in her house. Laurie wonders if Chris and Kasey "are just gonna freak." She asks, "She's expecting burgundy?" What I don't understand is why this seems to be news to Laurie. I suppose Kasey could have changed her mind since they did the original interviews, but then why wouldn't Laurie say, "She told us she wanted something pale?" I can't figure out what went awry here. I feel like Chris and Kasey must have expressed their desire for strong colour, preferably reds, in their application/interview. I can imagine Laurie deciding not to cater to the homeowners' wishes, but not pretending that she had no idea about them. MPDP reminds them that the homeowners have no say in what's done to their room.

Vern's rolling yellow on the wall; man, it looks way brighter yellow on the wall. It's a very sunny yellow, whereas in the tray it looked more like a clear mustard. Vern says he could go either way on the trim: leave it white or paint it yellow, too. I'm not crazy about trim painted in the same colour as the walls, generally speaking, although I have seen it done well. In this case, their trim isn't anything special, so maybe it'll look all right. Vern says he's leaving the decision to them. But wouldn't he have to have bought enough paint already?

Bob and Sandy tape the walls. Bob asks Sandy, in a really obviously coached way, "So what do you think? You think Kasey will like it?" Sandy's not sure. I think Sandy is sure. Bob doesn't think so. Sandy says Kasey painted the room yellow before, and then painted it white again because she didn't like the yellow. Sandy says she keeps talking about burgundy and French country. Bob: "Yeah, well, we got none of those."

Chris thinks Sandy would like it if they painted the trim. Vern and Kasey agree that that would look good. I'm thinking with the ceiling and the walls and the trim all painted the same colour, it might be a bit much. But we'll see.

Ty's going over Laurie's plans for a king-size headboard. It's what she calls a "stairstep fashion," with a raised rectangular area in the middle of the top edge. The headboard will be upholstered with the diamond-patterned fabric and framed with a wide wooden border.

Vern sews drapes while Chris irons fabric. In addition to panels for the windows, they'll be curtaining off the doorways to the dining room and hallway. I don't think those doorways have doors, so I can live with it. I can't stand it when they put curtains over interior doors. What a nuisance.

Laurie tells Ty about the room dividers; she wants them to remain stationary so she'd like to discuss how they can be attached to the wall.

Vern and Chris switch places. Chris is a little unclear on how a sewing machine works; he wants to know how to make it go. He eventually finds the foot pedal.

Ty whips out his notebook, where he's sketched two partitions of his own on behalf of Laurie's room. He's actually gone ahead and cut a few pieces of wood to demonstrate his idea to Laurie. He's proposing a sort of simple raised sunburst design, with rays that emanate out to varying lengths to fit inside the rectangular area of each panel. The rays are made out of 1 x 4s, with the ends in the centre cut on an angle so the motif is a little more graceful. Laurie's impressed. Laurie's got some kind of sunburst thing above the bed, too, which is where Ty got the idea. It seems her plan had been to mimic the geometry of the headboard on the panels, but it looks like she'll go with Ty's idea.

Vern, having finished the ironing, leaves the sewing to Chris.

Bob and Laurie sew pillow covers in the cream and black fabric. Now that I can see it better, it's not really black, it's more like a...wait for it: flat chocolate brown. Actually, Bob sews, and Laurie praises him effusively. Laurie pulls the pillow up onto the table, and slaps it a couple of times, showing how wonderfully squooshy the down pillow forms are. She says she splurged on the pillow forms: $100 for the three of them. Bob says it's worth it for Kasey and Chris.

Vern unveils the wine cabinet for Ty. Vern says it's beautiful, but it's basically a refrigerator in the middle of their living room. I agree. Ty's all, "Whoa!" He kneels down, saying, "It's a wine cooler!" I guess that's a pun. He tries the handle. "It's locked!"