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Previously on Caesar? I Hardly Even Know 'Er!: Rome to Athens proved a difficult leg for Lake and Michelle, who argued and griped as other teams worked their way through Olympic events and luck-based Fast Forwards. BJ and Tyler went a long distance in the wrong direction in an arena other than comedy stylings, and they probably would have been eliminated but for the extraordinarily bad navigation from Lake and Michelle. In the end, the dentist and his assistant were Philiminated, dadgummit, and we were left with five teams. Who will fairly obviously not be eliminated...tonight?
Credits. Ain't no monkey prettier than Phil. [BOMP.]
We are careening around the Peloponnese, "a region on the southern tip of Greece." Phil is strolling around the beautiful ruins as he explains that this is the Fortress Of Rion, the seventh pit stop on the race. He reminds us how the teams arrived and so forth, both with frog hats and without. I will tell you that I recently had the pleasure of hanging out with a glorious two-year-old wearing (1) a Madonna T-shirt; (2) rainbow-striped leg warmers; and (3) Cookie Monster bedroom slippers, and she is far, far too cool to wear a frog hat. I'm just saying. Phil wonders whether Eric and Jeremy are going to just continue coming in first all the time, and whether BJ and Tyler can pull it together after barely avoiding the boot.
11:54 PM. Eric and Jeremy, going first (as usual, as their girlfriends will tell you). Their clue tells them to fly to Muscat, Oman. Phil says that this 2300-mile jaunt will take them to an "oil-rich nation" that's almost 5000 years old. Interestingly, the show puts up a map -- of a type they usually don't use -- showing just where Oman is in relation to, say, Iran and Iraq. The answer is, "As the crow flies, not far." Particularly from Iran. I'm really glad the show still tries to do legs like this, all things considered -- I'm sure their lives would be less complicated if they just tooled around the Holiday Inns of Western Europe. Once the teams get to Muscat, they need to find a huge incense burner, where there will be a clue box. I'm thinking hunting for an incense burner is going to favor BJ and Tyler, who were undoubtedly the guys in college who would set off the smoke detector at 2:00 AM on a Wednesday in January, forcing everybody else to get out of bed and go stand outside in the bitter cold of Northern Ohio STOMPING their FEET on the SIDEWALK across from the CONSERVATORY until the FIRE DEPARTMENT let us GO BACK INSIDE. Um, or something.
We return to Eric and Jeremy, who are noting that their clue first tells them to cross a nearby bridge on foot. ("YES! FOOT! YES!") When they get across the bridge, they'll find a visitor center and sign up for one of two charter buses to the airport. The guys discuss how the other teams are tired of being behind them all the time. Probably true. Jeremy insists that this is because they're just better and faster and more awesome than everyone else. It's seriously the thinnest pool of talent ever when this claim can plausibly be made by a couple of guys who couldn't solve a word search in Weekly Reader without a dictionary, two spotters, and somebody to make sure they didn't hold the pen upside-down. They get to the visitor center, and while it's not open, the sign-up sheet is there, and they sign up for the first bus, leaving at 9:00 AM. Or, as they would know it, "one finger less than all of them."