Episode Report Card Daniel: B | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Bang, Bang (My Baby Shot Me Down)
By Daniel | Season 2 | Episode 17 | Aired on 03.06.2009
hing he wants to tell her: "Because you're right. I think today is the day." A tear rolls down her cheek. Over her shoulder, John looks at Cameron. Riley does too. Cameron cocks her head. God, poor Riley! Although if Cameron and Sarah plan to start firing at Riley, they shouldn't be in each other's line of fire like this. John looks back at his mom for good measure, and then says "no."Back at Jesse's hotel room, Derek's going through papers and photos when Jesse comes in, still in her guidance counselor costume. He tells her she's late and asks where she was. "I got hungry and I hate room service," she says, and he starts going over the recon he got on their guy, with his 'round the clock bodyguards, and his walled, guarded compound in the hills. "We should take this slow," says Jesse, but Derek says they can't because the guy's planning a trip out of the country. Jesse says she's not sure she can do it, since she's out of practice. "You've got your people," she tells Derek. "My people seem distracted. What about you?" is his answer. She doesn't say anything, so he tells her it's happening at 2030 tonight and tells her to bring a vehicle so she can block the road. "You pin down the guards, I'll snatch up the lawyer," he says, getting up and heading for the door. She calls his name but he ignores her and walks out. What have you done for him lately, Jesse?
Back at the Connor Compound, John's explaining to his mom when Riley, who is pacing around outside, is still alive. He says Riley didn't rat them out but trusted someone who did. Sarah asks him who, and John admits Riley won't say who. "This is not good, John. This could mean a lot of very bad things," she says. They look at each other for a moment, and then outside. Only Riley's not there anymore.
It's later. It's dark. Derek crouches in the bushes, beside a road, resolutely determined to be the only one willing to provide this show with any damn action. A vehicle approaches. Derek checks his watch. The vehicle speeds past, and Derek watches it. It's a yellow Volkswagen. Probably not the vehicle of choice for the target, but John looks at his watch again.
Jesse's getting ready at her place. She checks out the photos that are scattered all over the bed, and suddenly she's attacked from behind by Riley, trying to strangle her. "I know, Jesse. I know!" she screams. They struggle, and Jesse throws her off, knocking her against the dresser. Riley smashes a vase and threatens Jesse with a shard. Jesse's all, "what's this about?" and Riley wails about how Jesse wanted John to care about Riley, to love her, and Jesse's all, "yeah, that was the plan," but Riley says it's more than that: "She's supposed to kill me, right? That's it! That's the real plan!" That's absurd, says Jesse, but she's not exactly convincing. Riley says Jesse knows the only thing that could turn John against Cameron would be for Cameron to kill Riley, and she wails that Jesse's the one who called CFS, her foster parents, the school. "How could you do that to me? I trusted you! I loved you!" "Loved" you? There's probably nothing behind that, but were there other, um, showers? Jesse throws a -- I don't know, some heavy object at Riley and they start scrapping again until this time Jesse's got Riley from behind, and Jesse starts screaming, "I rescued you from hell and brought you to paradise!" Riley's not struggling. "I gave you a purpose. A chance to be a hero!" She asks how many people get a chance to have their lives mean something. For their deaths to mean something. Yeah, she's a psycho, and Riley starts struggling and screaming again. You're probably going to have to find a new hotel, there, Jesse.
Riley can't get free. "You could have been beautiful. But you're just a coward," Jesse tells her. Riley's all, "I'll show you a coward!" and then they're fighting again. Real knock-down dragout, with the two of them slamming each other against things, choking each other, rolling on the floor. It goes on for a while, like when Peter Griffin fights that chicken.
On the floor, Riley is on top of Jesse, choking her, so Jesse tries to gouge Riley's eyes out with her thumbs. Riley staggers backwards, and finds some kind of long ugly statue or perhaps a rather disconcertingly huge and misshapen vibrator and starts beating Jesse with it. Savagely, ferociously. From the floor, Jesse manages to kick Riley in the chest, sending her flying backwards, and then Jesse kicks a nearby coffee table, springing open a drawer with a silenced gun in it. She grabs it and shoots Riley in the chest. Riley falls to her knees, and then all the way to the floor, dying. Jesse falls back on the floor herself, when she really should be looking for the Do Not Disturb sign to hang on the doorknob.
Meanwhile, Derek's still waiting on a friend and checking his watch every ten seconds. Then a convoy of three vehicles go by: the Kaliba lawyer. No vehicle blocks the road, no one pins down any bodyguards. Derek impassively gets up to go.
Cameron's in the shed, tinkering with something mechanical. John comes in and says he can't find Riley. Cameron says if she's out there she'll give him a call: "She always does." Nice "if she's out there," Cameron. "Cameron, did you ...?" asks John. She doesn't answer right away, but then says he knows she didn't. Well, he doesn't know that. He asks what she's doing, and she says she's making something for him. She hands him a pocket watch and he asks what it is. "You've tried to fix me, twice now. It's not working," she says. He's all, yeah? "I'm not capable of self-termination," she says. "Suicide," says John. She can't do it, but he can, she says. "Why would I want to kill you?" he asks, aghast, as though her erratic behaviour isn't reason enough. She tells him he might have to someday. She's planted a small explosive in her head, near her chip. He opens the pocketwatch. Instead of a time piece, there's a row of buttons. Looking upset, he closes it again. She hangs it around his neck. Seems kinda conspicuous, Cameron. "All you have to do is hit the switch," she says. He asks her what Future John would do right now. "Future John doesn't live here. You do," she says. I think he was probably hoping to hear "request sexual relations with me," but that's not going to happen. He tucks the watch into his sweater and she half-smiles at him.
He walks out of the garage and heads up the driveway to the house, but something catches his eye: a dead bird in the grass. Not the same one as before, I don't think. Great. So they're going to get the friggin' World Wildlife Fund on their asses too!