Christine wins another duel, this time despite Albert's (and Probst's) attempts to help Mikayla. Ozzy worries that if Savaii doesn't have the numbers going into the merge he has decided is coming up after the challenge and Christine comes back into the game, then Savaii will be screwed. Because Christine hasn't made it clear enough that she hates Upolu and will flip to Savaii as soon as possible or anything. So he talks to Cochran about giving up the idol and intentionally going to Redemption if Savaii loses the immunity challenge, so he can beat Christine and come back into the game on Savaii's side.
Back at Upolu, everyone is suddenly really, really, really Christian. Lead by Coach, they pray for everything – including the hidden idol. Even though Coach is the one who found it and kept that fact secret from half his tribe. Instead, he pretends to find it now and lets everyone in on it, just like Jesus would have done! If Jesus was a deceitful, self-righteous asshole. Upolu prays throughout the challenge, too, where four tribemates are blindfolded and have to maneuver through an obstacle course while connected to a long string. John is picked to connect the blindfolded tribemates to the string, yet somehow manages to mess that up and put Savaii behind. And then Jesus gives Upolu the win.
Except that it wasn't Jesus giving them the win at all, but Satan! For the "reward" is a truly awful Adam Sandler movie and some similarly awful-looking hot dogs. Savaii returns to camp, where a furious Ozzy has changed his mind about his plan to go to Redemption and wants John to go instead for being the reason why they lost. The tribe agrees, but the morning, Ozzy has changed his mind yet again. At Tribal, Ozzy tells Probst all about his brilliant plan to be sent to Redemption and tell Christine and Upolu that John idoled him out. He gives his idol to John and sure enough, he's voted out. If the merge doesn't happen week and/or if he can't beat Christine, then it's one of the stupidest decisions ever made on this show. Actually, even if the merge happens and he beats Christine, it's pretty stupid.
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Sorry I missed last week! School is a lot of work. So much, in fact, that this is going to be my last recap for a while ... more on that later, though.
Upolu return to camp. Edna, who has no right to be in this game, whines about how hard it is to see her name at every Tribal, then suddenly talks about how crazy Li'l Li'l Russell was yet again and how hopeful she is that he'll crazy himself out of the game before the tribe votes her out. Rick agrees, muttering to Coach that Li'l Li'l Russell is too volatile to take to a merge. Coach assures Rick that they'll "keep him under control," like, you haven't been able to do that yet, but keep being optimistic that you'll somehow make it happen. Ah, but it turns out that Coach has figured something out, as he interviews that he'll just take Li'l Li'l Russell out himself if the time comes, à la George shooting Lennie in Of Mice and Men (spoiler alert! Way to ruin it for all of us, Coach).
On Day 17, we head right into the Redemption Duel. John and Ozzy are watching for Savaii, while Albert and Sophie are in the audience for Upolu, because, it seems, the people who voted Mikayla out are too chicken-shit to face her now. Probst explains the challenge: each contestant must take apart a crate and use the planks to build a bridge, then solve a puzzle on the other side using some of those planks. And just in case Mikayla isn't the one in the lead the entire time, Probst will give her as many hints as possible in the hopes that Christine, of all people, doesn't pull a Matt and truly us all show how stupid the Redemption Island concept is.
Probst calls go, and Christine quickly figures out that she can just lift all the planks on one side of the crate in one fell swoop instead of taking them out one by one, thus saving herself some time. Probst makes sure to tell Mikayla about this, as does Albert. By the time Mikayla starts on the bridge, though, Christine is a few planks ahead of her. When Albert calls out more encouragement to Mikayla, Probst points out that Mikayla's former tribemates are helping her, but not Christine, who was also (briefly) on that tribe. Apparently, Probst has forgotten about how Christine flipped them off last time. I wish Christine would just take her last plank and smack Probst with it, but instead she puts it on the bridge to advance to the round. Mikayla isn't far behind and makes quick work of taking her bridge apart, but Christine maintains her lead and starts the puzzle.
Probst decides to spell out exactly what they're trying to make out of their puzzle pieces: the giant "redemption island arena symbol." I was not aware that Redemption Island Arena got its own symbol. I'm pretty sure it doesn't deserve one. Even one as dumb as this, which looks like a guy standing spread-eagled with crab hands and feet. Soon, Christine is done except for one piece that's upside-down, so clearly she is going to take this thing. Suddenly, Mikayla thinks she's solved it and calls for Probst to check it. NO! CHRISTINE MUST ALWAYS WIN! This cannot be!! And then Probst gleefully cries "NOPE!" because she's wrong. Even though Probst obviously wants Mikayla to win, he can't help but love it when a contestant screws up a puzzle. Probst encourages Mikayla to do things like "look at it" to see where she went wrong, while Christine keeps working ... and solves it. Unfortunately, Probst is too busy blabbering on about looking for clues and adjusting to hear her first ten calls to him to check her work. Finally, he comes over and, obviously annoyed, pronounces her the winner.
Mikayla gives a teary good-bye speech about wanting to be "better" and "stronger" as a person (like Christine!) and then leaves, much to what had to be her surprise. I feel bad for her, but she really didn't do anything when she was in the game other than try to coast by on her strength even when it seemed obvious that that wouldn't be enough. Anyway, Probst reminds Christine that she has taken five people out of this game so far. "You're becoming a legitimate force," he says. Oh, fuck you, Probst. "Becoming?" Really? She's been awesome since Day 1. "I've always been a legitimate force," Christine says, putting a hand up but somehow resisting the urge to slap Probst with it. He sends her away as Ozzy looks on and says something about how when the tribes merge, Christine could go with Savaii or go back to her old tribe. Even though she's made it very clear - as did her former tribemates just a few minutes ago - that she doesn't want anything to do with Upolu and vice-versa, Ozzy worries that Christine will go back to Upolu and give them a numbers advantage in the merge. So, he says, if his tribe loses again, they should send someone to Redemption who can beat Christine. Even though no one can beat Christine, ever. "You gotta make big moves in this game," Ozzy concludes. Yes, you do. They probably shouldn't be stupid ones, though.
Ozzy and John walk back to camp. On the way, Ozzy pulls John aside and says they should "help each other out as much as [they] can." John, of course, agrees. Ozzy then tells John his "worst case scenario" plan if Savaii loses again: voting Ozzy out to Redemption so he can beat Christine in time for the merge, then re-join Savaii so they'll have a numbers advantage. John's just like "uh ... yeah? Okay?" because he cannot possibly understand what Ozzy is talking about or why he's doing this. I certainly don't. Ozzy says he'll give his idol to someone in the tribe and hope he gives it back if Ozzy returns to the game, and then John interviews the entire plan for us again just in case we were too busy laughing at how stupid Ozzy is to hear it the first time. "It might be one of those big moves I might have to make," Ozzy says, thinking that he is just so noble and important. John butters him up, calling the move "admirable," then interviews that if Ozzy does what he says, it'll give John another three days on the show.
And now is the time when Coach goes back to his Douche ways. You know it's coming because we're watching him wave his arms around from the point of view of a helicopter, which always means we're about to see a Douche Warrior Pose Montage. But this time, it begins with a prayer: "Father, you've been so faithful to me in this game," Douche says, like, I'm sorry, but now God is being faithful to Douche? Really? REALLY? Geez, you give this guy a tiny bit of adulation and he just can't handle himself. "I am not worthy. I am not worthy. I am not worthy, Father," Douche Wayne Campbells. I love how the editors, clearly bored out of their skulls this season, put subtitles in for that even though it was easy enough to hear.
And then, the warrior poses. Douche narrates that his tribe is sad as a shot of the fucking sun hovers around Douche for no reason other than the fact that it's ridiculous before dissolving as Douche reaches the conclusion that if he tells the rest of the tribe that he has the hidden idol, it will surely lift everyone's spirits. Because nothing cheers someone up like finding out that someone else has immunity. Oh, and then the sun comes back and hovers over Douche for a while before expanding and fading out as an eagle sound effect plays. I mean, I could describe it here all day long but I could never do it justice. I love bored editors.
A rainbow hangs out over the camp. I bet Rick shoots at rainbows back on his ranch. I wish we saw more of him. Instead, Douche tells the tribe that they have to look for the idol today. While the others get pumped up for the search, Douche doubles back and tells the camera that he already has the idol and he, Sophie, and Albert know it. I'm thinking the big reason why he wants to tell everyone else now is because he no longer trusts Sophie and Albert after they voted for Edna instead of Mikayla, but however you want to present it to us, Douche. He says they're going to play a little game of pretend so the others don't know that Douche, Sophie, and Albert had the idol all along. And then they have a prayer circle. Oh my god, what do non-Christians do on this show? Fake it, I guess.
After Douche asks God for the idol and to win the challenge (greedy!), Li'l Li'l Russell adds his contributions. And then I think Douche got annoyed that Li'l Li'l Russell was the last person to talk to God so he comes back and talks to God and asks him for stuff again. Sophie interviews that she doesn't feel bad about lying to God by asking him for an immunity idol she already has because she's not the one talking, but it does her give "a little bit of an icky feeling" about Douche. Anyway, just when Douche thought he got the last word in, Li'l Li'l Russell jumps in with an "amen!" and all Douche can do is repeat him.
With that, the search for the idol that has already been found begins in earnest. Even useless Edna tries to find it! Douche and Sophie decide to check out the treemail instead, and find that the challenge will involve "the best pairs of twins." Too bad they voted out Mikayla the model already! Now all they have is Sophie. This leads to a ridiculous interview from Douche, who acts like treemail is such a privilege to find and that they "rolled up" on the treemail just like they're about to "roll up" on a win. This challenge is extra-awesome for Douche, as it includes body paint so they can turn themselves into "warriors." Sophie reads this, then gives Douche a moment to celebrate before continuing on that this time, the painting has rules, and players have to pair up and paint themselves the same as their partner. Douche says they should grab the idol and head back to the group and show them that they just found the idol and treemail, so clearly, they are going to win everything.
And that's what they do. Li'l Li'l Russell is way too excited to hear that someone other than him found the idol, practically collapsing on the ground in relief and happiness when he hears the news before grabbing Edna and bear-hugging her. What a weirdo. And then, of course, Li'l Li'l Russell says Douche found it five minutes after they prayed for it (really? Just five minutes? He didn't have the patience to make it look like he actually had to look for the thing for a while?) so, clearly, God did them all a solid and he's on their side. Doesn't he realize that if God was really on his side, he would: a) not let him be on this reality show in the first place, and b) let him find the idol and not Douche?
Anyway, it's time for the challenge. We get to see how the tribes have painted themselves, and Upolu took the whole "paint yourself to be identical to your partner" thing very seriously. Li'l Li'l Russell is stuck with a blue paint bikini top to match Edna's real one, while Sophie had to draw a beard and moustache on her face to match Albert. Tragically, there simply isn't enough paint in the world to give Douche a moustache like Rick's, so instead they just put big crosses on their faces. I'm getting really sick of Survivor: Bible Camp right now. Meanwhile, the people on Savaii were a bit more lax about the treemail instructions; the blonde girl is wearing a pink bikini top but Ozzy, her partner, did not see fit to draw one on himself. And none of the women on Savaii painted moustaches on their faces. It's going to make me laugh for at least fifteen minutes that Sophie did that. And finally, what's with Savaii's triangle obsession? They all have triangles all over their bodies. Are those easier to paint maybe?
Anyway, it turns out that this is the stupid Product Placement Movie challenge, so the winning team gets to watch like five seconds of a movie that is sure to bomb in theaters (remember that Jack Black movie a few seasons back? Yeah. Like that). This time, it's a pile of shit starring Adam Sandler. Cut to the contestants trying to pretend they want to see a movie like that. But their reward for sitting through it and pretending it's funny and enjoyable will be movie food, so that's okay, I guess. Oh, and since the movie is about a twin brother and sister (played by one actor, as Sandler is now trying to be the even less funny version of Eddie Murphy), Probst will go on a long boring explanation about how that somehow ties into this challenge while Dawn tries not to fall asleep.
For the challenge, one set of twins will be the callers and the other two sets will wear blindfolds and have to maneuver through an obstacle course while tied to a rope with just the caller to guide them to a bag with little wooden masks inside it. Once they've brought back the four bags, one of the blind-folded sets will have to pair the masks up into identical pairs simply by touch. Rick and Douche will be the caller pair for Upolu, while John and Jim will do the honors for Savaii. Probst calls go, and the fun of watching people stagger around blindly can commence!
Dawn smacks her head on a wooden post right off the bat, so she's half-dead already. Edna keeps up with Li'l Li'l Russell by grabbing hold of his ass, so she can look forward to being voted off for slutiness . Oh, but then she smacks her head on a wooden beam like Dawn, so she's probably dead now anyway. "Almost knocked her out!" Probst screams giddily before focusing on "Keith's long body." When you think about it, Probst truly is one of the worst color commentators ever. Or the best. Li'l Li'l Russell makes it to the first bag but he's too short to untie it, so Edna does it for him and they head back. Somehow, they make it back to the start at the same time as Team Keith and Dawn, but while Albert and Sophie quickly head out for Upolu, John takes a while to unhook Keith and Dawn from the rope and hook Ozzy and the blonde girl into it.
Sophie nails her face on a wooden post (I guess that's where the mark on her nose we'll see in subsequent interviews came from) but her and Albert's trip is otherwise uneventful until they get close to the bag and Albert has trouble hearing Douche's screams. Albert manages to get the bag, as does Ozzy, although he and Dawn are still behind. Suddenly, Li'l Li'l Russell and Edna are on the third bag, but struggle to untie it while Keith and Dawn catch up and then take the lead. They make it back, but then, alas, there is trouble. John can't seem to get Keith and Dawn unhooked from the guide rope, although I can't tell if he's doing something wrong or if his tribemates won't just get out of his way instead of standing around like idiots and making everything more difficult for him. Finally, Jim jumps in to try to fix everything while Sophie and Albert (who also has a blue bikini top painted on. Hilarious) set out for Upolu. They're nearly at the fourth bag by the time Ozzy and the blonde set out.
Ozzy and the blonde stage the beginnings of a comeback when Albert can't get the last bag untied. When Probst announces that Ozzy and the blonde are caught up, Albert just rips the bag off, which is apparently legal even though the rules said you were supposed to untie it. Whatever. Ozzy actually unties his bag and heads back, still behind Upolu. And they'll be even further back, as they have trouble with their rope not being tied onto the guide rope correctly. "Cochran was in charge of getting them hooked in and HE DID NOT DO A GOOD JOB!" Probst cries, making sure we all know that this is John's fault and not Ozzy's (or Jim's, who seemed to be the person who did the hooking in the end ... ). Also, what the hell time is it when they did this challenge? Sometimes it looks like the sun is about to set and sometimes it's perfectly bright outside.
Sophie and Albert get to work on the releasing and pairing up the masks, while Ozzy decides to re-hook himself to the rope so he can actually move without getting caught up every three steps. "THE WAY IT SHOULD'VE BEEN IN THE FIRST PLACE!" Probst announces to everyone who might have thought this was Ozzy's fault and not John's. It doesn't even matter anyway, as Douche is leading his tribe in a prayer that is sure to give Sophie and Albert the edge. "Nobody can help at this point!" says Probst, who apparently hates God. But he totally comes through, as Albert and Sophie get their masks paired up right and Upolu wins.
There's a really cute moment where Sophie goes in to hug Albert but has to just stand there with her arms outstretched because she can't actually see him. And then it all goes to shit when Douche demands that everyone get on his knees to pray while Ozzy just starts punching various inanimate objects in frustration before yelling at "you guys" for not hooking him and the blonde girl in correctly. While the rest of Savaii, including Dawn (who is probably more sincerely religious than anyone else there, by the way), fume, Upolu pray, pray, pray, ending with "in Jesus name, AMEN!" I don't understand what happened. Like, when did this reality show turn into the Trinity Broadcast Network? Have these people all been talking so fervently about Jesus this entire time and they didn't show it until just now? And then Ozzy runs up and jump-kicks the wall, so I don't know which team is more mature here and I hate everyone.
Probst gives Upolu the idol and asks Douche if this was a big win for them. Well, no shit. Of course it was! And now this gives Douche another chance to talk about God and how he gave them the win, as if God likes Upolu more than Savaii. Fuck that. The loving God these people purport to believe in should favor everyone. Probst says Upolu now has the advantage, and Li'l Li'l Russell points at the sky. But Probst clarifies he meant they have one member more than Savaii does, not an advantage in a possible unearthly teammate. Douche gives the losers a douchey thumbs up and leads his tribe off to the movies.
Probst isn't done yet, though - he has to ask Ozzy about his little temper tantrum. Ozzy says he's frustrated and angry, and that his tribe would have won if not for a certain someone who couldn't hook him into the rope correctly. Probst doesn't ask anyone else to speak or defend himself, just sends them away. John gets to speak in the slo-mo walk of shame, of course, saying that he's not so sure that Ozzy is going to come through with his plan to have the tribe vote him out after John made them lose the challenge. We get to see Ozzy's temper tantrum in slow-motion again, too, which I appreciate.
Night falls and it's time for the movies. This generally seems to be the crowd of people who would sincerely enjoy a shitty Adam Sandler movie (this is not to say that all Adam Sandler movies are terrible, not funny, and completely lacking in artistic merit, mind you. Most of them are, and this one looks to be especially so. Like, just the absolute nadir of his career), albeit a three-second long "sneak peak" at it. They enter the cinema and run over to the food. Li'l Li'l Russell barely reaches the counter and so looks like a little boy. Edna obviouses that winning immunity and food is great, and then we have to pretend that this Adam Sandler movie isn't terrible for a while. To her credit, Sophie only laughs once, and probably because of the sugar high. Douche weighs in and says he loved the film, of course, and that it had an important message about family coming first, as if these people will be anything resembling that at the Tribal Council. "We have to be uncompromisable," Douche says, blowing up my spellcheck. Thanx alott four tgat, Doosh.
Unsurprisingly, things aren't going quite as well at Savaii. Ozzy is still furious, saying that the challenge was a "disaster" that they could - and should - have won. John tells the group to feel free to vent their frustrations with him, as if they weren't already doing that. "What was so difficult?" Ozzy asks. John interviews that he felt like a "new level" of outcast with his tribe that night, then tells Keith, again, to feel free to vent at him. Keith says "it's not about venting - it's about who's going to Redemption Island." Ouch. Ozzy says they should "decide" that as a group, still not putting his own name forward for it as promised, and John realizes that he is screwed. Sure enough, Ozzy comes out with "I hate to say it, Cochran, but you lost it for us." John says he'll do whatever they want him to and that he feels "horrible." Why doesn't he try to defend himself or something? Anything? This "blame me! I'll get better!" act is so old. Even Dawn can't take it anymore.
Ozzy says that sending John to Redemption Island is a "risky move," but sending Ozzy himself there is even riskier. And since John has now apparently volunteered himself to go to Redemption, Ozzy thinks it would be a good way for John to "redeem himself." Yeah, and a great way for Ozzy to not have to fulfill the stupid promise he made earlier. So now, the group sits around telling John that this is in his best interests and he just needs to believe in himself. John should just tell them to go fuck themselves at this point, but instead he just thanks them for their "words of encouragement," only for Dawn to cut him off to talk about the importance of redemption again. John concludes in an interview that instead of sending Ozzy to Redemption as their "Trojan Horse," they're sending John, the "Court Jester," who has no hope of beating Christine. Well, not with that attitude, he doesn't! And back around the campfire, Ozzy tells John to "feel it in [his] heart" that he can win with more false sincerity than I ever thought possible, and the rest of the tribe chime in in agreement. "Don't be afraid! You've got to push fear out!" Dawn says.
John summarizes that everyone else in the tribe wanted him out and seemed to be united against him with a "weird Kumbaya rationale." John says he's not trying to be some Redemption Island hero here - just "make it as far as [he] can." Well, considering how generally poorly he's played all facets of this game since it started, I'd say he's gone further than he ever should have. And then, since we're still looking for filler material, apparently, we get more of Ozzy cheering John on on his death march against Christine, saying he just has to go to Redemption Island and intimidate her. John worries that he's not going to be able to look tough in front of Christine: "I don't well I can pull off the whole 'I'm indestructible, so you'd better be shaking in your boots, you stupid bitch.'" This gets a hearty laugh out of the group that can't wait to see John's ass leave.
For whatever reason, we don't have Tribal Council that night, but the . And to fill more time, we get an Ozzy crazy dream montage, not unlike Shambo's dream sequence a few seasons back. That one also had a shot of a crab. Thanks for the laziness/walk down memory lane, editors!
The morning, Ozzy complains of a headache while John complains of his poor challenge performance yesterday to Dawn, who just yammers on about how great it will be for him to get the redemption he truly needs on Redemption Island. Why hasn't John laughed in her face yet? He's just going along with these people. I don't get it. It's not like they aren't going to vote him out at this point, so why not make them feel as shitty as possible about it?
But then! Ozzy staggers around the forest and reminds us of his promise to John to direct the tribe vote Ozzy out in the hopes that he would beat Christine and give Savaii a numbers advantage. And after "some crazy dreams" last night, he's decided to do just that. Wow, I've done some pretty stupid things in my dreams - like accidentally wearing my pajamas to the mall - but nothing this dumb. Ozzy grabs the idol out of its hiding spot and puts it on to make a "grand entrance" back at camp. "You're amazing," the blonde girl says upon seeing Ozzy's idol. Really? Amazing? Really? Has she never seen something that is actually amazing before, so she has nothing to compare this to? That's the only explanation I can think of.
John takes a look and totally wants to keep it. Ozzy says he "might" just give it to him, and John's eyes light up. Sure enough, Ozzy announces that he's "kinda thinking" of asking them to vote him to Redemption. Jim asks John what he thinks about this. Gosh, I don't know, Jim. Probably really, really excited? Or that Jesus does not love Upolu so much as he loves John, because this is a freaking miracle. John interviews that he was quite pleased with Ozzy's decision, while, in the background, heroic music plays. Keith and the blonde girl aren't so thrilled about this, but they can suck it since it was their votes for Dawn that sent Elyse home and I think are why Ozzy is doing this now.
Keith gives a rare interview and says that if Ozzy is voted out and the merge doesn't happen as soon as they've all decided it will, then they're really screwed. Not only will they be stuck with John still, but they also won't have Ozzy. Fair point, Keith. Jim says basically the same thing in another interview, and the tribe leaves for Tribal Council.
As usual, Probst opens with Ozzy, asking him about his post-challenge temper tantrum and if there was any "finger-pointing" when they all got back to camp. Ozzy laughs that there sure was, and John was the subject of most of it. Probst asks John to explain himself, and John says that Dawn and Keith tangled the rope and he "panicked" and didn't know what to do. Uh... un-tangle it? I don't want to side with Ozzy here, but it's really not that hard. "I remember ... uh ... looking up at Jim," John says, like he's recounting war memories and not something that happened yesterday and is really not that big a deal in the grand scheme of life. John says it was his "worst nightmare" and he was humiliated.
Probst asks Jim what happened, since John's memory has blanks due to the trauma of not doing very well in a challenge. Jim says John basically threw his hands up at one point and just stared at Jim helplessly. Probst asks John if this kind of thing happens to him often. John claims that he's usually "calm, cool, and collected," but once again, this was a "new experience" for him and he clearly cannot handle new experiences. And then he says that the tribe believes they're merging tomorrow because it's "historical precedent" on the show. I've seen some historical precedent where everyone thinks a merge is going to happen and acts accordingly, only to get screwed over when it doesn't. Has John seen those seasons? Maybe he should. He adds that they're hoping Redemption Island will "work in [their] favor" and give them even numbers again, assuming the merge does happen and the person on Redemption Island returns to the game at that point.
Dawn is asked for details on how Redemption Island is supposed to "help" the tribe. She says they're hoping that "whoever" goes to Redemption Island beats Christine and returns to the game and Savaii so they'll be even against Upolu. Dawn also manages to pronounce both tribes' names incorrectly, so, nice one, Dawn. Probst says this plan confuses him, even though I'm sure the producers have been telling him about it all day now, and why should John return to the tribe that votes him out? Ozzy says John isn't - Ozzy himself is the one "putting [his] life on the line" here. Yeah, don't be too over-dramatic or anything there, Ozzy. John can't help but grin at this, while Jim and Keith scowl. Ozzy says he had a dream, and in that dream the merge happened and Ozzy returned to the game and it was awesome. So he thinks this will help him find the redemption he thinks he needs after Parvati kicked his ass out the last time he played. He says he didn't listen to his "heart" and his "gut" then, so he's going to do so this time. Too bad they're both saying the stupidest stuff to him. He says this is the "ballsiest move" he can think of and the "biggest, craziest game" he wants to play - especially when he has an idol.
Of course, Probst stops him right there to see Ozzy's precious idol. Ozzy says he's going to tell Christine that John idol'd him out of the game, thereby making John "the villain" and "the double agent." John giggles. "What if we don't merge tomorrow?" Probst asks. Ozzy says that's always possible, and he could be leaving his tribe to face another challenge without the great and powerful Ozzy to lead them to victory in it. Keith still isn't on board with everything, saying he thinks it John's "time" to go. The blonde girl weighs in, saying Ozzy is a powerful force on their tribe that they'd hate to lose for just one challenge. Probst asks Jim for a worst-case scenario after the duel, and Jim says if Ozzy loses the duel, they'll be without Ozzy and without the numbers. With that, Probst says it's time to see who has the stupidity courage to vote someone out who already wants to leave.
John votes for Ozzy, of course, gushing about how this has never happened on the show before and he's thrilled to be a part of it. Probst returns with the urn and asks if anyone would like to play his idol or give it to John. Ozzy says he's decided that he's changing his mind about the plan and using it on himself to send John to Redemption Island. Now THAT would have been a pretty awesome (and cruel) move at this point, but Ozzy was just joking. He gives the necklace to John, of all people, and John swears up and down to give it back to Ozzy when (if) he returns. Probst reads the votes, and sure enough, everyone voted for Ozzy. The tribe cheers him on as he leaves, saying they'll see him back with them tomorrow, and Probst snuffs his torch. Ozzy is used to taking off at this point, but this is a new kind of Survivor, so he has to skip back a few steps and listen to Probst's "you will have a chance to get back in this game" speech before heading off to get his ass kicked by Christine. Probst congratulates the remaining tribe members for "one of the biggest moves in the history of this game - based on one big assumption: that the merge is ." We'll see if that risk pays off for them week, but I don't see how it can. Over the credits, we see that Ozzy kept his promise after all and tells Christine that he was idol'd out of the game - in between interviews about what an iconic move this was. I think he meant to say "idiotic."
Anyway, that's it for me this season - I have to leave you all to learn stuff. Hopefully, I'll be back in a few seasons. If not ... I've been recapping for 11 years now (wow, it really has been that long) and I loved it all. Even all the seasons with Li'l Russell! Thank you all so much for reading, and keep in touch - my email is down there in the italics.
To read more from Sara Morrison, you can follow her on Twitter, subscribe to her on Facebook or you can even follow the Tumblr thing she had to make for her grad school class this semester (please do! Her professors will be so impressed if she can get followers besides her mother). Email her at saramorrison@gmail.com.