Galusers

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After Kelly's surprise boot last night, the Galu gang are more determined than ever to keep the immunity idol out of Li'l Russell's hands while Shambo is more determined than ever to get rid of Laura. The reward, yet another trip to a picturesque location with food, is won by the five-man team of Natalie, Li'l Russell, Laura, Dave Ball, and Brett, except this time they get to take pictures of themselves using a product placement camera phone. Because camera phone pictures always come out so good. This phone also has the clue to the latest hidden idol on it along with a video that basically shows the five that it's hidden underneath a square-shaped mossy rock. As soon as they get back to camp, Li'l Russell is off searching for it, and while Dave Ball tries to follow him, Li'l Russell is somehow able to outrun Dave Ball and lose him in the forest, then double back to a mossy rock wall and find yet another hidden idol. Shambo, meanwhile, is so ready to see the back of Laura that she celebrates loudly and obnoxiously when Laura is eliminated from the immunity challenge, which Mick goes on to win. Now all Foa Foa and Shambo have to do is convince one more Galu to turn and they'll have the majority vote. And that person, they think, is John. Galu, meanwhile, tries to trick Foa Foa into voting for John by having Monica tell them she'll join them if they vote John. Then four Foa Foas vote John, five Galus vote Natalie (they've finally learned their lesson about voting for Li'l Russell), Shambo votes for Laura and Galu gets the majority again. Guess what? John doesn't like this plan one bit, nor does Foa Foa believe Monica. So there are five votes for Laura and five for Natalie. Everyone seems willing to stick with their votes in the second round and take a chance on the rock pick… except for one person. John switches his vote to Laura and she is eliminated.

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Aiga returns to camp in dramatic slow-motion. Except for Li'l Russell, of course, who swings in a hammock and VOs that he is amazing and the entire reason why things are the way they are right now. I don't care to figure out if that's true or not at this point. I am so done with him. Dave Ball runs over to the Foa Foas talking on the beach to congratulate them on a "good move." He really enjoyed the hell out of that immunity idol play last week, despite the fact that it could have been him going home because of it. Things are less happy in the shelter with the rest of the Galus. Laura is furious at Li'l Russell, "that little snake," as she calls him right in front of Natalie ... does she not see her there or just not care? Openly plotting against someone's alliancemate seems like a bad idea. Laura interviews that they should have known better than to assume that Li'l Russell wouldn't have an immunity idol, which is true. It's also true that Monica did know better and everyone dismissed her. Over in her personal shelter, Shambo is very much enjoying this, talking to Li'l Russell about the look on Laura's face when he played the idol and what she said when Kelly was eliminated. Her version of events differs slightly from what we actually saw, but it is Shambo so that's not a surprise. Li'l Russell and Shambo giggle and cackle, and then Shambo says that no one knew about the immunity idol except for her and Li'l Russell, which also differs slightly from what we actually saw, but whatever. It's the day in this interview and she is still savoring the moment of triumph against Laura last night, saying that she just wants to find the immunity idol so she can give it to Li'l Russell again. And while I do find her comments entertaining, I have a feeling she actually means them and is now valuing her vendetta against Laura over her life in this game. That's probably a mistake.

The morning, Li'l Russell is up with the cameramen and ready to find another idol. He searches the area while every one else sleeps because they NEVER LEARN. Li'l Russell says idols are like magnets for him and he's drawn to them, already assuming that the third hidden idol is his. The rest of Foa Foa wake up and do things like tend to the fire or, in Natalie's case, attempt to lasso a fish. The Galus finally wake up and Shambo is ready to go with the anti-Laura campaign in interviews, followed by a clumsy pro-John campaign as she heads for the well with him and tells us that she's hoping to get him on her and Foa Foa's side, thus giving them a 6-4 advantage over Galu at the vote. She tells him that Galu is over and lets him in on her need to take Laura out of the game ASAP, news that, by the way, doesn't do John any favors since he's in an alliance with Laura. What's to stop him from running back to Galu and telling them what's going on with Foa Foa and Shambo if they didn't know already? She asks him if he'll vote against Laura if she doesn't win immunity. He won't commit, but promises not to tell anyone about their conversation. He interviews that he thinks he's the only person on Galu who knows that Shambo is on Foa Foa's side, as if they couldn't have all guessed. Nothing Shambo does is subtle. I mean, look at her hair. Come on. He says he needs to do "what's right" for him. Whereas Shambo just wants to do what gets Laura out of the game.

Reward challenge! Probst explains that they'll be dividing up into two teams of five again, and each team has a large ring with a cradle-bed thing above it that is controlled by four ropes -- one for each team member with the fifth person lying face-down in the cradle. The four team members will pull on the ropes to move the cradle around the ring so the fifth person can grab a series of numbered flags and place them in slots on a log. The first team to do so wins a trip to an island for a waterfall picnic. Li'l Russell says he wants the reward because he's assuming that it will also come with a clue to the immunity idol. I hope it's just as vague as first clues always are, like the last one that simply said there was an idol and it was somewhere around camp. Oh, and also they get to take a stupid Product Placement camera phone with them. No, they don't each get a phone as a prize. And no, the phone will not have videos of family members on it. It's just to take pictures with, because we all know how high-quality those camera phone pictures are.

For the teams, we have Shambo, Jaison, Monica, Mick, and John in the cradle for yellow and Dave Ball, Brett, Laura, Li'l Russell and Natalie in the cradle for purple. Now that the Foa Foa people have been evenly dispersed on the teams, I don't know who will win this one. Probst calls go, and it takes both teams a few minutes to figure out how to work together to move the cradle. Both teams get their first flag but have trouble putting it in the spot on the log. John drops his, while Natalie hangs way out of her cradle to get the reach needed to put her flag in. By the time John gets his first flag in, Natalie is coming back with her second. And her boobs are already hanging out of her dress, so that's fun for everyone. Purple is still ahead by one flag when Monica's rope knocks the No. 9 flag out of its slot, forcing them to have to go back and fix it. That puts purple two flags ahead. Natalie is doing amazing at this, hanging onto her cradle with just her legs. Her cradle is basically vertical, but since she's apparently allowed to touch the dirt with her hand it's not a problem. Soon, purple is four flags ahead of yellow with only two flags left to go. If they make a mistake, yellow will have a chance to catch up, but they don't. Purple wins easily, with a lot of the credit for that going to Natalie. As MVP, Probst hands her the loaner Product Placement phone. What a prize. On their way out of the challenge, we are subjected to yet another Li'l Russell VO about how he wants to find the immunity idol.

And then after the break, there's another VO from Li'l Russell as he explains to us that a reward challenge was won, who won it, and what their prize is. The contestants take pictures of themselves with the stupid phone because that's what the Product Placement company paid for, and then they arrive at the island and the picnic. There are hot dogs, mac and cheese, and pies! Natalie thanks the Galu members for "allowing" her and Li'l Russell to come on their first reward, as if she and Li'l Russell had nothing to do with it.

Back at Aiga, the mad dash for the hidden immunity idol begins! Oh wait -- it doesn't. Jaison, Mick, and Monica lie around in the shelter instead, with Jaison trying to convince Monica to vote with Foa Foa and their secret Galu member in return for a guaranteed Final 6 spot or whatever. Monica manages to remain noncommittal while getting more information from Mick and Jaison about their secret fifth member. Monica immediately interviews that she's pretty sure it's Shambo. Then she rather cleverly says she'll agree to be their sixth vote if they agree to target John. "We can absolutely do that," Mick says, not looking at her.

And back at the reward challenge, Li'l Russell discovers the real reason for the stupid Product Placement phone -- one of the photos on it is a clue to the hidden idol. For some reason, he shares that with everyone, which makes me think that he was not the person who discovered that clue in the first place because if he was, he would have erased the picture and not told anyone else about it. Brett reads the clue out loud, which basically says it can be found under a moss-covered stone. And just in case that wasn't enough of a hint for you, there's also A FREAKING VIDEO that shows them exactly what the stone looks like (square), because it's important to make it as easy as possible for Li'l Russell to find another stupid idol.

The reward team arrives back at camp. While Monica hugs her Galu members hello and gushes annoyingly, Li'l Russell runs right over to Mick and Jaison and quietly tells them about the idol clue. They head out to look, which Dave Ball notices, saying "they're already moving." Well, yeah. It's an IMMUNITY IDOL. Damn straight they're looking for it. Why aren't you? Dave Ball and Laura set off to follow them to make sure the idol doesn't fall into Li'l Russell's hands. Where are the rest of Galu? Why are they not helping in this effort? Idiots! While Jaison looks for the idol under a tiny circular rock with no moss on it, Dave Ball wisely chooses to follow Li'l Russell. Laura follows Jaison, taunting him about looking for the idol. And then, what do you know? Li'l Russell comes across a big, moss-covered rock wall, just full of square-shaped rocks! HMMM! DO YOU THINK THE IDOL JUST MIGHT BE THERE? Way to hide it near yet another landmark, idol-hiding crew of morons! Li'l Russell thinks he sees the correct rock but has Dave Ball following him around, so he runs off with Dave Ball in hot pursuit, until, suddenly, he is not in hot pursuit at all, as he manages to lose Li'l Russell in the woods. I'm sure the fact that a camera crew is not following Li'l Russell right now helped, too. But still -- that is pretty inexcusable on Dave Ball's part. Li'l Russell doubles back to the rock wall and, sure enough, finds the idol. Even though it wasn't simply hidden underneath the rock like the video suggested, but behind a rock at the bottom of the wall. What's weird is that Li'l Russell didn't even hesitate when he saw that the idol wasn't underneath the rock -- just looked in the hole behind it until he pulled out the idol he seemed to know would be there. "This is getting way too easy," he says. He's right. That was too easy. It's not even fun anymore.

I guess nothing happened on Day 26, because it's now Day 27 and things at camp are tense. Instead of looking for the idol, everyone is lying around staring at each other. Monica tells Laura that she doesn't trust two people on their tribe since Foa Foa told her that two Galus are voting with them. Two? Didn't Mick and Jaison tell her there was only one traitor? She says Shambo isn't trustworthy and hates Laura, so she's thinking the move will be to come after Laura. Laura interviews that she has to win the immunity challenge. You know, Laura, there is something you could do that would make winning the immunity challenge less essential for your survival in this game: FINDING THE IMMUNITY IDOL. Not like that's an option for her anymore, but it would have been nice to see her at least try.

And here we go! Probst explains: each contestant has three colored tiles and one rock to throw at them to try to hit as many tiles as he can. For each tile that breaks, he gets to shoot one arrow at a target. Whoever's arrow lands the closest to the bullseye wins immunity. That's cool, except why just one chance to hit the tiles? That tends to favor the men whose arms are strong enough to throw with the force needed to break through multiple tiles. Also, they don't have that whole throw-like-a-girl problem. The players get their spots and grab one rock each even though there's a big pile of rocks in front of them. Again, why only one throw? Didn't people used to get several opportunities in these challenges? Maybe Probst just wants them to end as soon as possible so he can go back to dying his hair. He gives them some last-minute instructions: if you don't break any of your tiles, then you don't have a shot at immunity. And if someone else breaks one of your tiles, then that counts as an arrow for you. That's not really fair to the people on either end of the game board, though, since they only have one neighbor to potentially miss and hit one of their tiles instead of two like everyone else.

Shambo throws first. Her non-softball skills are legendary at this point, and despite a wind-up that almost looks like she knows what she's doing, she totally misses. Jaison is the first to hit one of his tiles. Dave Ball also hits a tile, but it's Monica's. So she gets one arrow, much to her delight since she didn't get any on her throw. Mick gets a tile, to which Dave Ball loudly says "oh, bummer!" Either he's being obnoxious or he said that about someone missing and they stuck it in there to make it look like he is. Brett manages to break two of his tiles. And finally, there's Laura. She throws ... and misses. There will be no immunity for Laura this time. "HAW HAW HAW HAW!" Shambo laughs, not even trying to pretend anymore. She openly high-fives Li'l Russell. Despite how you feel about Laura, Shambo, you didn't get immunity either and this game is unpredictable. So I wouldn't be celebrating just yet.

Only four people have a chance at immunity. Brett steps up to shoot his first of two arrows. He lands on the target, although not super close to the bullseye. Jaison goes and shoots well over the target, eliminating him from a chance at immunity. Monica is up third, and before she shoots Probst reminds us all that she's only here because Dave Ball broke one of her tiles. Her shot lands on the target, but just barely and definitely not closer to the bullseye than Brett. She's out. Then it's Mick's turn. He gets inside Brett's spot to take the lead, but Brett has one more shot left. Unfortunately, the crossbow thing they're using to take all these shots sucks and the arrows are weak and flimsy and don't have feathers on the back to make them aerodynamically stable, so his last shot weakly sinks down below the bullseye and just outside of Mick's. Mick wins immunity. The Foa Foa curse has been broken! And Shambo is ready to say good-bye to Laura at Tribal Council, saying it is her "destiny to go home." That's a better destiny than Shambo's, which is, of course, to be remembered by a national audience solely for having silly hair.

Back at camp, Li'l Russell does some more evil swinging in the hammock while Laura takes out her loser rage on a coconut. Li'l Russell interviews that Shambo will definitely vote for Laura tonight, which means they'll have a 5-5 tie at Tribal between Laura and whoever Galu chooses unless they can convince one more Galu to join in with them. Shambo runs over to Brett and tells him that she's dead set on voting for Laura tonight and that Galu is through. Why would she tell him? Why is she telling anyone anything? She should really just leave this stuff to someone else who knows the first thing human behavior and has at least some common sense. Brett just looks sad and walks away while ridiculous poignant music plays.

Meanwhile, Dave Ball and Laura report to John for some number crunching. Their plan is to vote for Li'l Russell tonight at Tribal so they can flush out the idol if he has it. "Incorrect. The answer is Natalie," John says simply, noting that she's the only Foa Foa member who didn't look for the idol and thus the least likely to have it and use it against Galu. John then interviews that the Galu alliance is full of people with "pathetic analytical skills." "Let's telegraph a move to Russell -- you're an idiot. Let's sit back and let's piss off Shambo -- you're an idiot. Let's sit back and vote off Erik over a thirty-second decision -- you're an idiot." He's right on all counts except that last one. Erik was the right decision for most of Galu because he was trying to break them apart first. And just because John didn't know about the decision until thirty seconds before Tribal doesn't mean it wasn't in the works for longer with the others.

With the number cruncher off giving interviews about how stupid they are, the rest of Galu sans Shambo try to figure out the vote tonight. They realize that it'll be 5-5 with Shambo and Foa Foa voting for Laura. Dave Ball says that even that isn't a certainty, and Monica points out that "some people" are saying to vote for John tonight. Yeah, some people named Monica! Monica says they could tell Foa Foa they're voting for John tonight and hope they follow suit except for Shambo, who will vote Laura. That will give Galu the five vote majority. Brett thinks they should run this plan by John first. Dave Ball agrees that John can be "flighty," so they should think about this plan before putting it into action. "Absolutely," Monica says.

And then she's interviewing that the plan is to tell Foa Foa that she will vote for John tonight and hope the four do as well. Um... I thought the plan was to think about this and talk to John before making any moves. Oops! She talks to Li'l Russell, saying that not only will they eliminate John tonight, but they'll eliminate Laura after him and since Shambo will obviously vote for her, they'll have a strong majority against the rest of Galu. Li'l Russell isn't buying it, though, and seems ready to go to a tie to get rid of Laura. Monica says she's putting her ass on the line by switching to Foa Foa and she's not ready to do that AND vote out her closest ally Laura at the same time. It's a good argument, but Li'l Russell would have to be an idiot to choose Laura's closest ally and a law student (so she's probably got some brains) over Shambo, who is unpopular and stupid. Monica then reports to Mick and pleads the same case. Mick tells her it sounds good, but then interviews that he's not sure if he can totally trust her. Li'l Russell and Jaison talk on the beach and Li'l Russell brings up the idea of talking to John about switching to Foa Foa's side.

John finally talks to Brett, who is still in the hammock. He says Shambo is definitely voting for Laura, so their only chance to avoid a tie now is Monica's plan. The plan that could get John voted out if something goes wrong. SHOCKINGLY, John doesn't like this idea at all. "It would be nice to have that run by me before it gets employed," John says. Brett tells him not to worry -- he hasn't said anything. But Brett never says anything, so that's not saying much. As usual. John interviews that Galu's plan to save Laura is to give John four Foa Foa votes. "Uh... no. Doesn't sound like a good plan when you're John," he says. Dave Ball appears to John to try to convince him that they need to do something to try to shake up Foa Foa. John says they're betting his life in this game on Shambo voting for Laura. Brett mutters than Shambo will vote for Laura, and John says that's easy for Brett to say since it's not his ass on the line. Brett says if it was, he'd bet it on this plan. "I wouldn't," John says. He interviews that he's not about to take the fall to save Laura, who is in this situation in the first place because she picked a fight with Shambo. But it's not just about saving Laura here, John -- it's about saving Galu. Who you are a member of and probably have a better chance to make it to the end with than switching to Foa Foa, with whom you're almost certainly at the bottom of their totem pole.

And so, John goes to Li'l Russell, who says something completely unintelligible before telling him that he thinks Foa Foa is being "swindled" into writing John's name down. The music gets all intense here as if John didn't already know this. Li'l Russell says they have no intention of writing John's name down. It will be Laura tonight and a 5-5 tie. Which means a revote, and then the eight people who were not voted for must choose rocks to see who goes home. So John can risk a 1-in-8 (or 1-in-7 if Mick's immunity still applies, which it should ... or 1-in-6 if Li'l Russell plays his idol and that also applies) chance of being purple rocked out of the game or he can switch his vote for Laura during the second round and know he's safe for at least another three days. He'll also be the member of a majority alliance, which the odds say he will not be if he goes to the tie, since (assuming that Mick and Li'l Russell have immunity) only two members of the Foa Foa alliance (Shambo and Jaison) are vulnerable to the purple rock while everyone in the Galu alliance is. John tries to make a deal with Li'l Russell that someone from Foa Foa will go if he switches his vote to Laura. Li'l Russell agrees to that immediately, and John, to his credit, interviews that he probably can't believe anything Li'l Russell says.

Tribal Council! Erik and Kelly walk in with Kelly sporting a stupid purple pin in a show of Galu support. Probst asks John if he's surprised to see two members of Galu in the jury. John says he is, and that both Erik and Kelly's ousters were total surprises to him. Well, Kelly's was. He voted for Erik so I don't know how that can be a surprise. Maybe he's trying to play for Erik's jury vote and claim that the vote Shambo cast for Jaison was his? Probst asks Jaison if it's "easier to be the minority." Interesting choice of words form Probst considering that Jaison's only contributions to Tribal Council this entire season have been to talk about how difficult it is to be a minority. Jaison says that people from Galu should know that they can use Foa Foa's votes to advance themselves in the game, which is pretty much what Foa Foa said at Tribal Council the last time. John agrees with this, but Li'l Russell claims that they still don't have someone from Galu on their side even though everyone knows that's not true at this point because Shambo was so ridiculously obvious about it. Mick says they're waiting for someone to realize that this is an individual game and come to Foa Foa to get all four of their votes and apparently assume that no one on Foa Foa would also realize that this is an individual game.

Probst asks Shambo if Galu is a tight unit. "Negative," she immediately replies as Erik celebrates. She continues that Galu was broken when they voted Erik out. Laura is sitting behind her as she says this and shooting her the most disgusted look of all time, which Probst picks up on. Laura says that her Galu is tight as a drum and she doesn't know what Shambo is talking about. Um, Laura? Telling a member of the tribe you say is super-tight that you don't know what she's talking about would suggest that said tribe is not very tight at all. Probst points that out, doing some quick math to say that if Shambo isn't part of Galu, then the vote tonight could be a tie. Laura says she's aware of that, and Probst asks her if she's okay with eight people being forced to pick a rock while the two people the tie came down to are safe. Of course Laura is, since she knows that she's one of the two people who will be safe. Probst asks Dave Ball if he's okay with a tie, and Dave Ball says he is. "You gotta be willing to make big moves in this game if you're willing to win," Dave Ball says, somehow thinking that picking a rock out of a bag is a big move while switching your allegiance to Foa Foa is not.

With that, they vote. Shambo votes for Laura, of course, calling her a "viperous poison" or whatever. I'm pretty sick of Shambo's Laura-hate. Forming a popular people club and leaving someone like Shambo out of it makes you a bitch, but it doesn't make you a "viperous poison," whatever that is. I'm guessing she meant to say "poisonous viper," but being Shambo, she can't even get her last words to Laura right, despite no doubt practicing them in her head for the past nine days. Probst comes back with the urn and asks if anyone wants to play his immunity idol. Li'l Russell does not. And with that, Probst reads the votes off until we get five for Natalie and five for Laura. A tie! "Man this is good shit," Erik mutters to Kelly. Shhh, Erik! Jury members are not allowed to editorialize unless it's Eliza.

They vote again. This time everyone except Natalie and Laura is voting and they can only vote for Natalie or Laura. And the first person to vote -- Brett -- has to carry the urn back to the voting hut himself. Dave Ball votes for Natalie again, confidently saying he's ready to leave this up to chance rock-picking. Because he seems to think that's the only possible outcome right now. Thinking like that is why his alliance went from an 8-4 majority to this. John casts the final (unseen) vote and Probst returns with the urn for a second time. You know he's not pleased about having to walk two times in one night. This show is working him to the bone. Probst reads off the first seven votes, and it's four for Laura and three for Natalie. Which means Laura is thinking right now that either she's definitely safe or totally screwed. Suspenseful music plays as Probst slowly reaches for the final vote. And it is for Laura, who is shocked. As are Monica and Dave Ball. Natalie's grin is just adorable, by the way. Shambo manages to keep herself seated and not jump up and down and cheer at Laura's exit. Erik has slightly less success with this, as he smiles and whispers "so good." Oh, and there's Shambo's shit-eating grin and laugh at Laura's expense. I knew she couldn't keep it in. Dave Ball looks around for the Galu traitor. There's John, sitting by himself and looking fairly satisfied with the outcome. Probst says something stupid about tribes while Erik sums things up nicely: "and there goes the lead."