So in case you're keeping track, here's what Survivor has to teach us this season: if you feed some people and give them water and beds and shelter and comfort, then they will perform in various tasks notably better than people who aren't eating and can't sleep. This week, we learn this as Ravu first drops an immunity challenge due to poor balance (wait, you mean when they're exhausted from terrible conditions, their balance isn't as good as that of people with comfortable blankets and pillows? You don't say!), which gives Moto even more food and even more pillows and sends Yau Man to Exile Island. Gary then quits the game owing to his deteriorating condition, and Lisi is basically like, "I don't care," which begins the theme of the week, which is: Lisi sucks. Ravu continues fighting back at camp, where Rocky has declared open war on Anthony, telling Anthony that he doesn't act enough like a man. Seriously. It's just as bad as you think. And unfortunately, it's totally bothering Anthony, too. At the immunity challenge, it's a flat-out physical challenge that drops Ravu on its ass. Moto learns after the challenge that they have a choice: vote someone off or give up the good camp. And because they're wussies, they choose to keep their camp and make their team smaller. Not only that, but Lisi and Stacy, who are aligned with Alex and Boo and Edgardo, convince their "alliance" to vote off Liliana (who?), because it turns out that Lisi engages in ethnic stereotypes even against groups she is a part of, and thinks Liliana can't be trusted. So for no particular reason, Liliana gets the boot, instead of someone who has sat out multiple challenges already for sucking. Like Lisi. It's hard to care right now.
Previously on Oiled Up And Ready To Go, But Not In A Dirty Way: Ravu was still losing, and it seemed like it had to be partly because the entire tribe was so dehydrated that they qualified as dried fruits. But then they made a fire and started drinking water and were presumably reconstituted, but they just kept losing, so maybe the lack of water wasn't the problem so much as the abundance of suck. Gary fell hard at the reward challenge, and it seemed like maybe that was why he was seriously hurting later, and the medics didn't find anything urgent, so he stayed around. SO FAR. When Ravu couldn't scarf worms fast enough and lost the immunity challenge as well, Sylvia realized that it was time to come up with the immunity idol or face the boot. She didn't come up with an opportunity to hunt for the idol, despite knowing where it was, because she didn't want to...tip her hand? Lest she...stop herself from winning from the Loser's Lodge? So she finally ran out of luck and went home to her orthogonal home. There are now sixteen people left. Who will be voted out or medically evacuated...tonight?
On Night 8, after kicking off its third person in a row, Ravu returns from tribal council still in a foul mood. Anthony, of course, was recreationally picked on as a tangential part of the booting of Sylvia, so he's undoubtedly not feeling too comfortable. Earl announces that they're going to have some kind of a big talk about things, which immediately strikes me as a powerfully bad idea. You should only air grievances when they're going to be sensible. There's no reason to encourage bullies and their targets to fight. Earl thinks that they should "get it all out." He interviews that he wanted to air all the personality conflicts, and my reaction, as I say, is...why? Honesty of the "I can't stand you" variety is really, really overrated, especially when all you have to do is function. It's not a family; it's not thirtysomething; you don't have to heal wounds. Earl tries to get Rocky involved, and Rocky initially makes a brief stab at staying above the fray, saying that he doesn't "want to be involved in bitching and moaning." He leaves off the words "to people's faces." It doesn't take long for Rocky to change his mind, though, so he starts complaining that Anthony...well, complains. This is the kind of lesson for which Tom Lehrer should have composed a little ditty about irony. In an interview, Rocky tells us just how hard it is to want to insult people and have to hold back because they might vote against you if you don't keep your feelings to yourself. I don't know about you, but I really feel sorry for him. We return to the Fireside Chat of Hate, where Rocky tells Anthony that he's generally irritating, and actually claims that Anthony intentionally goes out of his way to be irritating. If you consider the remainder of this episode, you will find the accusations of intentional provocation kind of funny. "I don't usually deal with people like that unless it's a broad," Rocky declares. And then he turns and says, "No offense to the ladies; it's how I talk to girls." Hey, Rocky, none taken! We're not like those "un-fun" girls. We know that our breasts and hormones make us hard for you to take. We only hope that the fact that we are smooth-skinned and can bake cookies might make up for it. He goes on to say that he doesn't listen to the kind of talk he thinks Anthony engages in -- which is, again, kind of unspecified -- unless it's "a girl," his mother, or his "crazy aunt." I'm sure all the aunts appreciate his assertion that Rocky goes on to talk with utter disgust about Anthony "whining" or becoming "sentimental," and announces that Anthony should be acting like "a man," and not like whatever he's acting like. I'll tell you, nothing announces that you are completely confident in your manhood quite like lecturing other men on how men should behave, as if you are nervous that men who are not adequately manly might suddenly become women. NOT THAT YOU WORRY THAT THIS COULD HAPPEN TO YOU.
In exactly that way that people with poor social skills have of being right and being really annoying at the same time, Anthony smirks that he's sorry if he irritates Rocky, and that he has no idea what it is he's doing that's irritating. But then, out of Rocky's presence, in a very uncomfortable interview to watch, Anthony talks about how he's had "very little self-esteem" all his life. Suddenly, I don't like him either. He talks about being picked on and being insecure, and then we watch Rocky berate him some more about how Jessica and Erica were both better players than Anthony. This, of course, makes you wonder why Rocky made no effort to save either of them and actually participated in the ouster of Erica. I think Rocky is the first person ever to claim to be the victim of his own machinations. Except maybe Lex. Anyway, we go back to Anthony's interview, where he's now crying that he's not doing that well in challenges, but that if they want him gone, they'll have to force him, sniffling, "There's no way in hell I'm giving up." Oh, Anthony, no. That's not how you want to react to a bully, seriously. Man, woman, child, dog -- you can't get all boo-hoo from a bully who basically walks up and gives you two for flinching. You'll never survive that way.
Credits. I see dead skeletons.
On Day 9, it's another beautiful morning at Moto, where every morning is beautiful and every reality-show premise is watered down. Lisi and Stacy swim around in the water like the spoiled guppies they are, and Stacy gasses on about how beautiful it is over here at Couch Camp. Lisi brags about how great Moto is and how great they're doing, not that her challenge-skipping ass has had much to do with the winning streak. Lisi introduces a new plotline when she interviews that there's a "bond" between her, Stacy, Boo, Alex, and Edgardo. So that would be a majority, with the outsiders being Gary, "Dreamz," Cassandra, and Liliana (who actually exists, as you may have heard). Lisi says it's "almost been unspoken," which is weird, since we just saw her refer to "the five musketeers" while talking to Stacy. I'm not sure she knows what "unspoken" means, which wouldn't be surprising, since "compassion" and "class" and some other things also seem to be foreign concepts. Lisi says that the five of them "come together" in this beautiful -- and presumably self-preserving -- way. You can tell this is an alliance that has gone completely untested to this point, because that's the only time people talk about an alliance like this, like they're in the reality-show version of Hoosiers. It's all fine right up until you have to actually do something. Out in the water, Stacy talks about how Ravu must be doing really poorly, and Lisi's all cocky with her take-no-prisoners "whatever," as if -- again -- she's been any part of the reason Moto is dominating. I think her best contribution has been her willingness to sit out without complaint.
And now, we check in on Gary, who was not doing so well last week, what with the chest pains and the weakness and the dizziness. But what's the worst thing that could happen, right? Anyway, he is not doing so well again, and Cassandra is still the only one who gives enough of a damn to check up on him as he slumps on the couch. (Not a lot of "on the couch" sentences in your usual Survivor recap, huh?) Gary tells Cassandra that his breathing is still difficult, and that his head still feels crazy: "I can't continue with my head like this." He tells her that he feels like he's "just twirling all the time," and not in the good, happy, "I Feel Pretty" kind of way, either. As we glance at Gary's horrifically bug-bitten leg, he tells us that he's done some very unpleasant things, including duty in Vietnam, and that nothing was quite like this. I'm pretty sure he didn't mean that the way it...sort of sounded. He does maintain that the spinning head is just terrible, and he and Cassandra discuss the fact that he clearly can't go on like this indefinitely. Cassandra interviews that Gary should take it easy, considering his age, and his stress, and other possible factors, because nobody wants him to give his life in the service of immunity challenges. We look at Gary's horrible leg, which is just covered -- as in covered -- in bites. Like, if a bug wanted to bite him, that bug would wind up biting another bite. Lisi talks to him about how he's "got thousands of [bites]." She interviews that Gary "doesn't look good at all," and just when you think she might express concern, she makes it all about herself, explaining that the reason she finds this a drag is not that there's this clearly ailing older gentleman who might be in danger, but that the rest of the tribe has to take time out of its incredibly busy lying-around schedule (seriously, think about it: being on Moto has to be the LEAST time-consuming thing any person has ever done, short of being Hugh Hefner's girlfriend) to "babysit" him. She's not interested in "babysitting." She bitches that this is like waking up and finding that you have a baby, but it seems to me that it's actually like...showing concern for a sick person. Is this her first time? She actually says, "I don't want to babysit, so let's hope he gets better." Yes, that's it exactly. Gary should hurry up and get well, because Lisi doesn't want to have to take care of his sorry ass. He is so unreasonable.
And now, a challenge course. Two balance beams out in the water, with platforms at each end. This is the hug-your-way challenge that was done in Vanuatu when I was on vacation from recapping. Each person has to pass down the beam, squeezing by each other person, and you can only touch the one person you're in the process of passing. You can change the order, but only by having the order-changers jump in the water. When Ravu shows up, Jeff points out to Moto that Sylvia is gone, which is undoubtedly not a surprise, except that Moto might have assumed that she had the idol. Say, Jeff, what are we playing for? Well, we are playing for quite a bit of food -- fish, rice, spices, and so forth, as well as pillows and blankets. And the winning tribe gets a big bed with sheets and pillows. So it's an embarrassment of riches, probably destined for people who already have a lot of reasons to be embarrassed. And, of course, winner sends a member of loser tribe to Exile Island. Moto has to sit out two players, and it will be sitting out Cassandra and Gary.
The tribes start down different paths from the beginning. Michelle, for Ravu, is just squeezing by people using the hugging method. Lisi, on the other hand, is trying to do a thing where people crouch and she sort of haltingly leapfrogs sideways over their backs. At first, Moto's strategy looks absolutely doomed, and Ravu gets Michelle across before Moto gets anybody over. Yau Man crosses, and Ravu is up 2-0. Hey, maybe this thing is going to turn around, people! What do you think? Lisi keeps touching more than one person at a time, in addition to all her other problems, so she keeps having to go back to the beginning. In case you haven't noticed, she sucks. Sure hope she doesn't start acting like she's cool or anything! Rocky starts in kibitzing Anthony about how he's handling having Rita go around him, which is only going to make Anthony nervous, of course. They're locked in this eternal battle of bullshit now, where everything Rocky says makes Anthony more anxious, and every show of anxiety from Anthony looks like weakness to Rocky, and perceiving weakness makes Rocky attack. This is what happens with angry and self-righteous bullies, as opposed to solely angry ones. Finally, Lisi gets across the beam, and now Moto is convinced that its leapfrogging strategy is the right one after all, partly because it seems that they started out with their lamest person, meaning I'm not sure why they had her climb over the largest number of people. Rita knocks Anthony off the beam over at Ravu. Moto keeps up with the leapfrogging. Mookie and Anthony fall in. All the members of Ravu jump in and reshuffle the order, but Anthony falls in immediately. Because of course, Anthony is the one who doesn't have balance. He cries, and he gets defensive, and he smirks in a way that irritates people, and he can't balance so well, and thus does the cycle of picking-on continue. From here, it only gets worse for Ravu, as Moto has now mastered the leapfrogging and is dealing with its non-crummy, more athletic people, who have to make it past shrinking numbers of people. When Ravu gets around to trying Moto's strategy, Mookie can't remember not to touch two people at once, so that doesn't work either. Of course, Rocky won't pick on Mookie about this, because Mookie isn't the guy that happens to, and Anthony is. Before you know it, it's all over, and Moto wins again, so they have even more food. When Earl mutters in frustration, "What happened?," Rocky snaps back, "We lost, bro. What do you mean 'what happened?'" The best thing for me about watching Rocky do that is rocketing myself into the future, to the inevitable day when Rocky pulls that routine on the wrong person and some guy whirls around and flattens him. Which, in all honesty, would not be that difficult. Jeff asks Moto who's going to Exile Island, and they decide to send Yau Man, which is interesting. He is sent off, and then Jeff sends undefeated Moto and thoroughly defeated Ravu back to camp. Rocky is still all mad, and I don't think he'll be getting over it soon.
Back from commercials, we see a world of tiny fish, and then we are with Moto as they return with their feast after the reward challenge to find the promised big bed on their beach. Just what they needed to make their Survivor experience bear as little resemblance to Survivor as possible. Alex says that "once again," his team has "kicked the crap out of Ravu." As they all fantasize over how great sleeping in the bed is going to be, Liliana (!) says that the comfort and the food were both great to have. They inventory their spice collection, and "Dreamz" says that they're only getting higher and higher in morale. Boo pronounces the food "Moto-licious," which kind of makes me feel like he's eating spark plugs. Alex says that he feels bad for the individual people on Ravu, but that he wants to keep winning. And I don't want to give anything away, but I kind of think he's making up the first part.
Ravu. Day 9. Rocky hates everyone except Mookie, I think, and he only tolerates Mookie because their names create a natural bond between them. Rocky's first move upon returning to camp is to hurl something or other against the wall of the cave. Because when you have almost nothing to your name, what you really want to do is throw things against the walls. Come on, Rocky! Eat the flint! What are you, chicken? He starts bellowing about how "absolutely ridiculous" it is to lose five challenges in a row. Rita tries to talk him down, but he's enjoying himself and his little fit of geek, so he just keeps throwing things. Rocky starts babbling that maybe they should "go to tribal council right now," just "call Jeff up right now on the Jeff-phone" and say they want to go to tribal council and vote someone off. It's a comment that's brilliant in its stupidity, and I really mean that. "I'm skinnier than homeless people right now," Rocky tastefully complains in an interview. "I know fifteen homeless people that are forty pounds heavier than me!" You know how sometimes, it's not the crime, it's the cover-up? Well, sometimes, it's not the bellyaching about how hungry you are, it's the comparison of yourself to homeless people. Rocky starts haranguing the tribe about how that was the challenge they needed, with the food and the pillows and whatnot, as if this has not occurred to anyone other than himself, and as if he has secret information suggesting that the tribe simply ignored this challenge on the basis that they didn't want food that much. Rocky demands to know why they didn't win. "We just lost," says an exasperated Earl, firmly needling Rocky, intentionally or fortuitously, for the "what do you mean, 'what happened?'" business earlier. Multiple people try to get Rocky to shut up, but he just keeps on going, insisting that he's not even being negative, which is kind of brilliant. ("We're horrible! I'm not being negative! Yes, I know that's what negative means! Shut up, bro!") And then Michelle's chirpy little voice says, "Who's going to get more wood?" And then it's over, because if there's one thing we can all agree on, it's how much we all like wood. Earl interviews that Rocky's whole fired-up thing is great and all, but that there's more to having spirit than being an arrogant dickweed. I'm saying, this is Earl's point, and he makes it well.
Anthony and Earl go for a walk. Anthony tells us that he knows there's a target on his back should the team wind up at tribal council again, and he just feels like he has to do his best to stay in the game. He also says that he thinks the way to deal with Rocky is to let him talk and talk and make himself seem like a total idiot. I think I approve of Anthony's plan, although the problem is that a good part of Anthony's tribe currently is made up of Rocky, people who are too dumb not to follow Rocky (Mookie) and people who are either savvy enough or blank enough to settle down and stay out of it, and therefore aren't going to turn on Rocky just because he's dumb (Earl, Yau Man, Michelle). For his part, Earl tells us that it's getting more difficult for him to "look out for" Anthony, even though Earl himself likes the guy and thinks he's a good guy. But clearly not so good that Earl wants to go down with Anthony if there's nothing that can be done, which is exactly right. Earl says that he's still "devising the plan."
Meanwhile, on Exile Island, Yau Man receives a clue essentially informing him of the location of the idol, even more than the clue Sylvia got last time, which is really saying something. What it's saying is basically "If you don't find it now, then I just don't even feel sorry for you." Yau Man says that he's not unhappy about being sent to the island; in fact, he's happy for his shot at finding the idol, although like everyone else who has seen the idol-in-camp clues, he doesn't know how to find a time to dig by himself out of the presence of the rest of the team. He does think he needs it, though.
Moto, Night 9. Massage intrigue begins as Edgardo receives a night-vision massage from Liliana. Apparently, Edgardo was thinking of a dirty massage, because when he receives an actual massage, he gets all, "It's a sports massage!," making clear that the actual muscle-mashing thing was not what he had in mind. He was just looking for the touchy-touchy a little bit. And, really, aren't we all? Liliana says something about taking her shirt off, and the tribe chuckles. Except for Lisi, who is lying around being angry at Liliana for getting attention that Lisi clearly finds threatening. Lisi tells us that "sometimes, guys aren't hip to the ways that chicks maneuver," but -- get this: "Liliana tries to be so sneaky, but I'm Latin, and knowing my people the way that I do, I see what she's doing. I know in her little diabolical Mexican mind [!!], she's trying to come up with something, you know?" That phrase was "diabolical Mexican mind," in case you're wondering. In case, you know, you'd like to float that one at a cocktail party. Now, Liliana is receiving a massage, and Lisi isn't happy about that, either. Unfortunately, Lisi comes off in this sequence as bitterly jealous and threatened, because not only is it ridiculous to use phrases like "diabolical Mexican mind," but it's ridiculous to be in an alliance with men you think are such absurd flakes that they would stop working with you and change their votes because they get a massage -- sports or otherwise.
Moto, Day 10. The fire burns. Everyone else is asleep, but Gary is up, and he's miserable. He tells us that he can't do anything at all -- "can't function," because of the way his head is feeling. You might think it's the beginning of a prescription-drug commercial, but it's not. Alex checks on Gary, who's just absolutely wrecked. He tells Alex that this is way worse than the time he had malaria. Yeesh. It kind of feels like Gary is going to keep naming things -- "This is worse than Vietnam," "this is worse than malaria," "this is worse than that time the bat gnawed my hand off." I'm not really looking forward to where we're going with it. The medical team pays another visit to Gary. He tells them again that his head is swimming and that he can't get a deep breath. They have him lie down, and they check his blood pressure, as "Dreamz" interviews that Gary is one of the few people he digs on the tribe, so he wasn't happy about this at all. I like how they all sort of feel like they have to explain that they liked Gary before they can say that they didn't want him to keel over. Like humanity alone doesn't merit that level of devotion. Gary's blood pressure proves relatively normal, so the medical team can't really locate anything urgent. But of course, he feels horrible, and they basically say that they've done everything for him that they can in this setting, and that if he needs more care than this, they're going to have to pull him off the island on the boat. Gary doesn't hesitate much in saying that he will indeed need to do that, and they call for the stretcher and the boat. Gary said later in an offscreen interview that what he had was a severe allergic reaction to the bug bites, which seems plausible, based on the appearance of his legs. He said that once they shot him full of antitoxins, he did much better. If that's the case, then there certainly wasn't a lot he could do about it. ["It does seem odd, though, that anti-bug-bite stuff isn't in the medical team members' emergency kits." -- Wing Chun] Lisi offers this lovely sentiment as the medical evacuation continues: "I'm not so concerned about whether Gary stays in the game. Quite frankly, one less [sic] person means better odds for all of us." She's just unhappy that more people can't have a medical crisis! She'd love to be on Survivor Chronic Illness. Gary is placed on the stretcher and carried to the medical boat, and the tribe gathers on the beach to wave goodbye. Alex is good enough to tell us that he doesn't "feel good" about losing Gary to illness. That's big of him: "Yeah, I'm not happy about the old dude being practically dead." Alex goes on to say that if they lose the immunity challenge, they could be at a 7-7 tie with Ravu, luxury and winning streak or no luxury and winning streak. It's unusual to see anyone's eye on the ball at this point, but Alex's head is there so far.
When we come back from commercials, we've skipped ahead a bit, and it's Day 11 at Ravu. We watch Rocky snooze on his back, silhouetted against a sunset like he's something far more dramatic and interesting than he actually is, and then he interviews that he's "been going crazy," in case you missed the part where he threw things against the wall of the cave. He tells us that he wants to get the tribe "fired up" so that they can break their losing streak. He wants, he says, to "lead by example." When Michelle and Rita return to camp with the day's treemail, Rocky takes his first shot at "leading by example" when he walks up to the tribe buck naked as Michelle is trying to read the clue. As she's still talking, Rocky walks up to her and puts a hand on her shoulder, and she tries to keep her eyes on the clue and turns away, putting her hand up toward his face. Of course, his midsection is blurred out. I really hate this walking-around-naked shit. Really hate it. It's such a showoffy, aggressive, hostile way to treat people. It's a way of insisting that the rules of the public space are going to be as you say, and no one else can say anything about it. I really, really do not like it, just as I really didn't like it when Hatch did it. People mutter uncomfortably, and Rocky walks away. Rita makes a face and says in an interview that she only caught a glimpse, which she's grateful for. "Not a pretty sight," she says. See, you can make that joke, but even when you make a good joke, you seem to lose, because everyone knows that you wouldn't even be there talking about some guy waving his dick at you except that he forced you to be there. , Rocky gets it into his head to put on one of the girls' bathing suit tops, so he dons a pink bikini top and, of course, stuffs it with coconuts. Because nothing is funnier than an in-your-face dick, unless it's the hilarity of appearing in drag. This is like Drunk College Party's Greatest Hits, but it's not really the fun hits. It's the hits from at about 10:30 at night, when there's only the one guy drunk, and everybody else is starting to think the party kind of sucks. Rocky insists that he's "trying to make everybody laugh." He interviews that he wants to take the focus off of their losses, but fails to add "by shifting it back to myself, where it belongs."
We adjourn to a challenge beach. Jeff compliments Rocky on the pink top, apparently unimpressed. Rocky says that he wore it for Jeff, which is really pretty aggressively sexy for a guy who's this concerned about acting like a man. "Ravu has a great attitude for not having won anything," Jeff bitchily observes. I really wish someone had said "That's the way I hear you always are about the Emmys over the last five years, Jeff." Yau Man is brought back from Exile Island. When Moto returns, Ravu is informed about Gary's exit, and they all gasp, much more concerned about him than Moto was while he was almost dying. Jeff informs the entire group that Gary has definitely left the game, so Moto is down one person. But enough with the ill and needy. On with the screwing around! Jeff takes back immunity, placing it "up for grabs" yet again. He stabs it definitively into the ground. Immunity is pointy.
In this challenge, four tribe members will start out locked in a series of floating cages. At the start, one person will run out from the beach with the key to the first cage, and that person will swim to that first cage and unlock the first person. The unlocked person has a key already, and will then head across those floating things that Jeff calls "lily pads," until they unlock the second locked-up person. You keep this up until you rescue the fourth and final person, and then that fourth person and the third person (who lets him or her out) get into a boat where another tribe member is already stationed. Those three paddle back, picking up the unlocked but still stranded people along the way. Back on shore, the challenge becomes even more convoluted, as you form a pyramid (like in cheerleading), and the top person unlocks one last cage with one last person in it, and then you're done. Jeff also announces that the challenge has a twist, which is revealed in a note that's inside a bottle that the winning tribe will open after the challenge is over. So: swimming, lily pads, unlocking, paddling, moving people into the baot, and building a pyramid. Those are the elements. Moto sits out Lisi, because it sat out Cassandra last time.
The tribes take their places, all spread out in boats and cages. The first runners/swimmers are Rocky for Ravu and Edgardo for Moto. Edgardo smokes Rocky from the beginning in the swimming (he looks longer-limbed and more muscle-wrapped than Rocky), not to mention the fact that Rocky loses his key in the water and has to fish it out before he can free Yau Man. Why is Yau Man trying to run the lily pads? That doesn't seem smart. And indeed, "Dreamz" is way ahead of Yau Man. Both have to crawl across the lily pads in the end, but "Dreamz" gets there faster. He unlocks Alex as Yau Man continues to crawl across. Alex speeds down the lily pads on his belly. Yau Man finally frees Rita. Moto is basically one entire cage ahead as Alex unlocks Boo and Yau Man unlocks Rita at the same time. And then, things only get worse for Ravu, because as slow as you think Yau Man might have been, Rita is a lot slower. I have to wonder if you were allowed to just swim alongside the lily pads, because they're certainly not enforcing that you have to be above water. Boo gets Liliana out, so now Boo and Liliana join Stacy in the boat. They start to paddle back. At this point, this challenge looks like a total blowout. Rita finally gets on the platform as the Moto boat is picking up Alex. Mookie seems relatively speedy on the lily pads, and Moto seems to be bad at paddling, so Ravu is staying competitive. Mookie frees Earl, so they get in the boat with Michelle. Moto gets to the beach with a good-sized lead, but Ravu is still competitive. Moto builds their pyramid, and Stacy at the top has the task of trying all the keys on a ring to find the one that opens the last lock. Ravu actually gets its pyramid built and gets Michelle up there, but Stacy does find the right key, and Moto wins immunity.
Or...Moto wins the challenge, anyway. Ravu looks dejected and miserable, but they're about to have a little bit of relief. Jeff gives the secret bottle to Lisi. When she opens it, the note inside tells the tribe to choose between immunity and comfort. Basically, you can either have the Couch Camp and go to tribal council, or you can have the Ouch Camp and have immunity. For Moto, this note sucks, because they otherwise would have both the good camp and immunity. For Ravu, the note is awesome, because they otherwise would have neither. The note does not say, interestingly, whether the camp change is permanent or, if not, how long it will last. Jeff calls this an "interesting dilemma," choosing between being down another person after tribal council tonight, or going to a camp where they don't have food and blankets. Moto consults, and it doesn't take long for them to choose to keep their camp. Of course, everybody thinks it's going to be somebody else voted off. There was a ton of debate over the question of whether it made any sense for Moto to do this. Of course, in a sense, they're wusses, and they should have kept the numbers advantage, et cetera, but the impact of the better conditions is obvious. If they don't have to keep making this decision every three days or so, then time, they have an excellent chance of winning again, and who knows? Maybe later, they can have camp and numbers. If it were just luxuries, like the bed and the hammock, that would be one thing. But they're sleeping and eating, and the other tribe isn't doing much of either, and it certainly seems to be affording Moto a huge challenge advantage. I'm not sure I wouldn't have done the same thing. Of course, in my case, it would be because I love a comfortable pillow, but for them, it should totally be the challenge-boosting protein. At any rate, Ravu takes possession of the immunity stick for the first time. Jeff will see Moto later at tribal council. He sends everyone back to camp.
When we get back from commercials, it's Day 11 at Moto, post-challenge. Boo calls Moto "still undefeated," which is true or not true, depending entirely on the view you choose to take about whether they essentially forfeited or whether you inherently "lose" when you wind up at tribal council. Liliana (hey, Liliana!) interviews that confronted with loss of their "home" or voting someone off, they chose to vote someone off. Too bad for that person! Sucker! She says that, with Gary gone, they're actually losing two people in one swoop. It's interesting to contemplate that, indeed, when this is over, the tribes are going to be tied in numbers. In spite of the absolute pants-down spanking that Moto has been delivering to Ravu, it's all going to mean nothing in terms of the slide into the merge. For the last few seasons, numbers at the merge have been really big, in that they've either made the difference or they've had to be overcome through crazy acts of Yulsmanship. But after this, it's 7-7. Moto still has the good camp, but that's all they have now. The numbers advantage is vanishing immediately.
And then...oh, and then. "Dreamz" makes the extremely ill-advised decision to deliver a sort of address to the tribe, in which he says that rather than lying and backstabbing, they should just sit down and decide together in the open who should go. You will not be surprised that the address does not begin "I think the person to go home should probably be me." Instead, his idea is that the people the tribe can do without are Cassandra and Lisi. He says that if they do it this way, all open and honest and straightforward, they can avoid becoming "snakes." Lisi makes a "what the hell" face, which would be a lot easier to understand if she weren't (1) the queen of declaring how okay it is to act strictly out of self-interest even when other people's cardiovascular health is involved; and (2) really bad at challenges. Like, really bad. "Dreamz" says that if he's wrong, someone is welcome to say so. Edgardo immediately announces that he likes Lisi, so he's not going to vote for her -- he's going to vote for Cassandra. This is all happening in front of everyone, and it's painfully awkward. It's like watching someone ask someone else out with a bunch of hostile people standing around. Or it's the inverse of that, or something. Alex starts droning that you "can't ignore the interpersonal relationships" and blah blah blah, shut up, EVERYONE who went to law school at Harvard. Fuck all, man. Alex lectures about friendships and bonds, and I have to say, it's kind of glorious to see what a hot mess this tribe turned into the minute it was faced with anything other than a parade of free food and victories. "Dreamz" insists that they can still play as a tribe, and the crickets chirp. Stacy smugly interviews that "Dreamz" has no idea that her alliance of five is large and in charge. She apparently hasn't heard that, in this game, with a few exceptions, the first alliance to become entirely confident is usually the first one blown apart. "Dreamz" keeps trying to get people to reach a consensus through a public discussion, and they keep really not wanting to. He repeats that he doesn't want to see snakelike behavior yet. Cassandra, I'm sure, finds that very reassuring. At least she'll be voted off...to her face? Yeah, thanks, "Dreamz."
Cassandra catches up with Liliana, who's away from camp on a walk. Liliana basically admits that she's voting for Cassandra, because that seems to be what the tribe is doing. Cassandra interviews that she certainly could be the one being sent home. But she says that she doesn't want to be the first voted out of the tribe, just as she didn't want to be the first voted out of the game. Aw. "I'm holding on," she says. Indeed, indeed.
And here is the part of the show that got more viewer attention, based on my unscientific survey, than anything else. We watch as a sea snake slowly barfs up another snake. You may think it's shedding skin, but it's not, according to my sources. It is barfing up another snake. And while sometimes, the animal eating sequences have metaphorical meanings, this is just here because it's incredibly disgusting and therefore fascinating. Do you understand what I'm saying happens here? A snake barfs up a snake. A whole snake. Another whole snake. And then the tongue is flapping, and it is seriously the creepiest, weirdest, most physics-defying thing. It's like seeing a cat poop out another cat. It's incredibly disgusting, in the way that makes you want to run back the TiVo because you kind of don't believe yourself.
Stacy and Lisi chat with Boo and Alex. Apparently, "Dreamz" has his name mentioned, but Alex thinks that they have to stay strong for challenges. He thinks they should vote out Liliana or Cassandra, because of course, you would only consider women. Stacy immediately advocates for getting rid of Liliana, as does Lisi. Lisi interviews that Liliana is "the weakest link," because Liliana is a threat to interfere with her alliance's plan. So by "weakest," she means "strongest." I kind of have a feeling that Lisi often talks backwards in that way. Alex insists that "Cassandra is bad at everything," which is sort of funny, but also seems kind of bullying and mean. I thought I was going to like him, but I don't at all. Alex interviews that it's much more sensible to keep Liliana and get rid of Cassandra, so that they can get numbers back, because after this, they're going to be tied at seven members each with Ravu. Alex doesn't understand why you'd throw out a strong woman at this point. In a way that isn't very suggestive of an actual "alliance," Stacy just declares to the men that she's voting for Liliana, and Lisi says she is, too. Alex says in the interview that this decision makes no sense to him. I feel you, Preppie McPaperchase.
Tribal council. Jeff sits the members of Moto down, after having them dip their torches for the first time, so we have to sit through "fire represents life" some more. Jeff asks Boo about losing Gary, and what the reaction was like. Boo insists that everyone loved Gary, and that he stayed in for three days being sick, and that they hope to see him again. Jeff asks "Dreamz" about his friendships, and he says that he was friends with Gary and is friends with Cassandra, but he admits that the rest of them tend to glaze over when he talks. Heh. At least he knows when the glazing is happening, which is a good thing. Edgardo insists that he doesn't know what "Dreamz" is saying at all. Not at all! He thinks everyone treats everyone else the same, and he wants to keep "Dreamz" from feeling that way. It's always enlightening to see how brilliant the people in a big early alliance always are about reassuring other people that they shouldn't feel left out. I'm pretty sure "Dreamz" will totally believe Edgardo, don't you think?
Jeff asks Lisi how camp was, and she accuses "Dreamz" of having gone on what she calls "a soliloquy" (nice try, but not really a very good use of the 25-cent word, considering that he was clearly talking to other people and making an argument, not talking to himself). She discusses his unforgivable lapse in saying that the tribe could do without the precious her, when she is wonderful enough not to keep the tribe from winning any challenges. She gets very sarcastic about how "Dreamz" is "pointing fingers," and it's such bullshit, because he's not doing anything in public that Lisi wasn't doing in private. He wasn't pointing fingers any more than Lisi was; he just pointed them in front of the entire team, including the pointees. It's dumb, but not in the way Lisi means it. Jeff asks "Dreamz" whether it's true that he tried to conduct a "powwow" about whom to vote off. "Don't make me sound like a monster," "Dreamz" complains with a grin. He points out that he repeatedly told people to stop him and object if they disagreed with anything he was saying, and nobody did it. He also says that he certainly didn't mean to be giving "a sha-quee-lah or whatever she said." Jeff corrects him. And...really? "Sha-quee-lah"? I don't know about you, but I'm thinking we should invent that word, and it should be the one we use for lectures about integrity. Because while "Dreamz" didn't really deliver a soliloquy, I'm willing to agree that he delivered a shaqueelah.
Jeff asks Alex what you can base a vote on at this point. Alex says that you have to think of "the tribe moving forward." Jeff asks Liliana what she delivers to the tribe, and she says that she's strong, and also helps the guys with tasks around camp. Jeff asks Cassandra about all this, and Cassandra takes the opportunity to compliment Liliana's "female strength." I think that has to do with cracking things between your boobs, but I'm not completely certain. Cassandra and Liliana exchange grins. Jeff says that it's time to vote.
Alex votes. Stacy votes. Liliana votes for Cassandra. Edgardo votes. "Dreamz" votes. Lisi votes for Liliana, whispering, "The alliance is five, not six." I desperately need her comeuppance not to take too long. Cassandra, interestingly enough, votes for Lisi. Boo votes. When Jeff returns, he reads one for Liliana. Then one for Lisi. Then one for Cassandra. Then Liliana. Liliana. Liliana, so she's done. "Wow," she says. She gets up. "I'm so shocked, so shocked," she says, as she walks over to get snuffed. "If they didn't get me out now, I was going to beat them," she tells Jeff as he puts out her torch. She leaves. And she takes her diabolical Mexican mind with her. Lisi smirks. Hate!
Liliana's final words call her "100% shocked"; she doesn't see why they would get rid of a strong person at the beginning. "There are some good liars," she adds. It's kind of sad, if it's true she was considered this much of a threat, that we never saw her before this, practically ever. I guess that should have been a sign, considering what happens to people like Amy Krebs.
week: guess what? That five-person alliance isn't so smooth after all. There's a surprise. Yau Man digs for the idol. (Go Yau Man!) Rocky and "Dreamz" beat the crap out of each other, probably during a challenge, unfortunately.