Previously on Survivor, everyone knew John was the leader at Rotu. Or at least John thought everyone knew he was the leader, but more likely everyone just knew he was delusional. Rob wanted to "get rid 'a" him, but they nevertheless cut a deal to stay together as Rotwo after the merger. Rotwo won immunity, causing Tammy to gyrate in a way that was not pleasing to Paschal. He did not hold her in contempt of court, however. Then, Gina was voted off by her "family" and headed back to meet up with former family member Hunter. And then Peachy locked them in an attic, and the Moppet was poisoned to death, and Gina danced ballet, and then her terrible grandmother cut off all her beautiful blonde locks, and then they combed each other's hair and bathed and had sweet, sib sex. In the V.C. Andrews version, anyway. Ten remain.
The sun peeks through palm fronds as the members of Maraanu work together. Kathy exclaims in the least convincing voice ever, "Huh! It's the skull of a man!" The skull-like skull lies in the dirt where it was most likely discovered two hours ago, when an unfortunate and now unemployed cameraman was off diddling around and missed the original footage. Paschal proclaims in this reenactment that it is "definitely a skull." They gather around, and Kathy is particularly interested in its eyeballs. Then, one of the female tribe members -- one with lots of matted hair on the back of her hands, incidentally -- pokes at it. Paschal tries to imagine how many centuries the skull has been buried, and then Neleh then gets excited to have found the skull's ribcage. Actually, skulls don't have ribcages, but she's excited to have found the ribcage affiliated with the skull. Paschal says in a Judge Judy-like way, "Do we agree that that's a Paepae?" They do agree, because of the even rock formation and not because Paschal will slap them down if they disagree like Judge Judy would. Kathy explains in a confessional that a Paepae is a Marquesan monument where they had ceremonies; she adds, "And where they even performed cannibalism." Neleh is amazed that "he" was buried inside of a wall, and then Kathy and Paschal diagnose that he suffered a "skull fracture" as the result of a "blunt trauma to the head." I always thought we'd hear those phrases only in relation to Rob's non-veiled threats, so it's a surprise. During this exchange, Neleh adds a new expression to her limited repertoire: her wrinkly nose expresses "ew." Or, "EW." Suddenly, we cut away to a swinging axe, which cleaves the skull. Except it's not the skull at all, but a skull-shaped coconut. It's like the scene in A Christmas Story when the boy who's not Ralphie -- the "Mommy's little piggy" son -- has to go to the bathroom, and just as the toilet seat is raised, we cut to the inside of a pot of a big, shitty-looking chili, so at first we're supposed to think the chili is in the toilet bowl. Except we're not supposed to think it's chili. Anyway, now Kathy carries wood and voice-overs that the night's Tribal Council was difficult. She says it was a tough vote; she was happy because the vote went her way, but she still felt bad when Gina left. She doesn't think she can break up the bond between Paschal and Neleh, and thinks she will be voted off if there's another Maraanu Tribal Council.
We now join Rotwo on Day 19. John craves pork as he tells the others that the island probably has a "bunch of pigs runnin' around." Robert and Zoe laugh, while a dead-eyed Rob looks on. In a confessional, Rob tells us that his tribe is "a bunch of morons," and that he's had it with them. As we see Vecepia walk over and plant a big, slurpy kiss on John, Rob tells us in voice-over that Vecepia is fake and that it drives him crazy. He knows it's part of the game, but he still hates it. He complains that, at the other camp, he always had an "ace in the hole" -- is that what kids are calling it these days? -- and laments that he has no such thing at Rotwo. Then Sean drowns in waist-deep water because Rob is hogging the life raft. Okay, so Sean doesn't drown and actually manages to stand in the water quite successfully, as Rob tells Sean that they don't know if the other members of Rotwo will keep their word. He says they might vote Kathy off as promised, but they also might vote off Sean or himself to strengthen the power of their foursome. In a confessional, Rob tells us he's been stuck in a "road block situation" for the last ten days, and that he can't around it. He says he's tried going up one side, and then the other side, and maybe it's time to dig a hole right through it. He doesn't say, "It's too high to get over (yeah, yeah); too low to get under (yeah, yeah); I'm stuck in the middle (yeah, yeah); and the pain is thunder." Nor does he call anyone a vegetable. Nor do any of the other tribe members suddenly appear and start caterwauling, "You've got to get yourself together you got stuck in the moment and you can't get out of it. Don't say that later will be better 'cause you're stuck in the moment and you can't get out of it," to which Rob would most certainly respond, "Clowns to the left of me! Jokers to the right! Here I am stuck in the middle with you."
Subliminal scuttling crab footage. Who knows why?
Back at Maraanu, it's time to check the mail. Paschal retrieves a very long clue about being "left in stitches" and "sew[ing] up the reward." It also advises them to "choose wisely" and to wear long sleeves and pants. A map is enclosed, which the chosen tribal representative will follow. Since Paschal is blind, and since it would be pushing their luck to choose Neleh -- who rose to the clue-reading occasion, (because reading is FUNdamental!) -- to apply map-reading skills, Kathy is Maraanu's obvious choice. Or at least you'd think Paschal was blind and Neleh illiterate because neither one has once expressed any interest in assuming a leadership role. That's not to say that the blind and the illiterate are incapable of assuming leadership roles -- just that the blind and illiterate are less likely to successfully navigate unfamiliar terrain based on a non-Braille map. See how P.C. we are here at TWoP? We never call children shifty. In any case, Neleh suddenly realizes, "One of us has to leave." Because to her, the clue was just a really challenging word problem.
At Rotwo, the tribe members respond to the same clue. Tammy immediately takes control and translates the poem into a reasonable communication. She says, "There's a map here. We've got five minutes to pick one person, get them outfitted in long sleeves, pants, tennis shoes, and have them start following this map." It's an expository work of art, people. Why can't Tammy write the clues? And can she be on my Taboo team? She asks for volunteers to make the trip, and suddenly all of their feet become very interesting. A close-up of John's expression is priceless; he's clearly flummoxed trying to figure out what the obvious leader would do: volunteer, remain behind, or do more naked cannonballs? After a few awkward moments, Rob says he'll go, but first he has to remove the 100 marbles from his mouth. Seriously, he's impossible to understand here. I mean, I know he volunteered, but I have no idea what he said. Tammy doesn't seem eager to send Rob, and tries to solicit another volunteer, but they're not having it. So Tammy pats Rob's back, and then the others all shake his hand and act like he's a hero. And sure he's a hero...Italian, with ham and cheese.
We rejoin Maraanu to confirm what we already knew: Kathy will be their representative. She runs circles, packs fanatically, shouts that she'll take some mango with her, and then stalks off. Meanwhile, Rotwo readies Rob. As he walks away from the camp, he explains that he volunteered because he thought there might be a change ahead. He says he's been playing the game by taking chances, and volunteering to be Rotwo's representative is consistent with that attitude. Rob then stops two feet away from the camp and stares at his map, which is a bad sign. He doesn't flip it right side up, however, which is an even worse sign, since it means he's still looking at it upside down.
Now we see quick shots of a hut, two side-by-side cots, a few leis, and two spice jars labeled "herbs provencale" and "oregano." Hey! I saw those at Williams-Sonoma last week! Rob and Kathy approach alongside each other from slightly different angles; they're about ten feet apart, but still ignoring the other's presence. Then Peachy pops up and congratulates them for successfully reading their maps. He welcomes them to an area called a Tohua, which is a public meeting place, and explains that all-important decisions in traditional tribal life occurred there. Yeah. Clearly those decisions included things like whether the ancient tribe's new buff should be fuchsia, or more of a magenta. Peachy announces that Rob and Kathy will now serve as "ambassadors" to a very important event: the merging of the tribes. Rotwo and Maraanu no longer exist, and tonight "a new tribe will be born," making me an even stronger advocate for the right to choose. Peachy says they'll sleep under the stars on the same Paepae where rival chiefs slept five hundred years ago while "making decisions" -- yet another euphemism I hadn't yet heard. Peachy declares that by morning, they will have decided on a new name and painted the tribal flag. He then says they'll need food to think clearly, and the thirty cans of beer he'll introduce shortly will surely contribute to mental clarity. Kathy cackles and fixes her hair and Rob thinks they have a lot to talk about; then, Peachy arrives with a pizza for each of them and says, "Tell me this is not gonna be a fun night!" Rob is boyishly excited over the pizza; he's practically bobbing in his seat; meanwhile, Kathy is just typically loud. Peachy then wants to know "what would pizza be without....beer!" as he dramatically throw back the lid on a cooler to reveal a mass of Coors Light. You'd think they were gold coins -- not silver bullets -- as commotion ensues. Kathy screams and squeals and it sounds like it's been dubbed over. By Robin Williams. On crack. In a confessional, she tells us she was amazed to be sitting across from this "young buck," and she thought to herself, "I'm gonna pound beer and eat pizza with this guy?"
We see clips of eating, drinking, smirking, and the raising of eyebrows. Kathy and Rob both claim to have heard a lot about each other. Kathy then brings up the naming of the new tribe, and Rob suggests "Burmese tribe," which Kathy thinks is hysterical. In a confessional, Rob tells us he was on a "total high": he knew he was taking a chance by volunteering for the challenge, but it paid off in the end. Rob and Kathy giggle drunkenly, and Kathy says she feels bad because her "tribe people" would love pizza. Rob says he feels bad, too, and Kathy says, "You do not," to which Rob responds, "That's too bad for them."
Kathy tells us in a confessional that they immediately started talking about the two tribes. We see Kathy telling Rob that she and Zoe were "like the moms" because they were all about cleaning the place up. Rob says, "You and Zoe feel you're pretty close?" And Kathy says she did feel close to Zoe -- again insisting that they were like moms. Not mothers of rival high-school cheerleaders in Texas, but the good kind of mom. Cookie bakers. Rob thinks it's "unreal!" and Kathy enthusiastically says, "Yeah!" believing that Rob is commending her on the closeness of her relationship to Zoe. She seems genuinely perplexed when Rob alleges that Zoe and John both told him they'd vote Kathy off first. Kathy borrows Neleh's bug eyes in response. In a confessional, Rob reveals that neither of them knows if the other is telling the truth, "just like nobody in this game knows who's telling the truth." Kathy tells us that -- based on conversations with Gina -- she thought Rob was just a "lazy kid," so she's having a hard time knowing what to believe. Rob asks Kathy what Gina said about him, and Kathy responds, "You're a lazy bum and you don't care about anything." If that wasn't direct enough, she adds that Gina also called him "two-faced" and "mean." And also that he's ugly and his mother dresses him funny and that he's too flat for that training bra he's wearing and should just give it up. Oooh, my junior-high experience just seeped in there, didn't it? Rob maintains his surprised act and insists that it's "unreal." He claims that just by talking to Kathy, he might be ensuring his own exit, because if the others find out he revealed their diabolical plan, he'll be the first one voted off. He also points out that, in that scenario, Kathy would be second to go. He then grins and proposes, "You wanna make a pact, me and you?" Kathy says something that I think has been edited because her lips don't match up to her words at all. Rob desperately insists that the others will never know and that it will just be the two of them. In a confessional, Kathy says that she thought the pact was okay, but that it happened so quickly and Rob wanted it so badly that she just agreed. They shake on it, and then go back and forth about being "serious." As opposed to ha-ha funny? Kathy says, "Don't stab me," and Rob answers, "You don't have to ask me twice," which is a random thing to say, because it wasn't a question. Rob explains in a confessional that both John and Kathy think they have alliances with him, and that he's lying now, just like he's been lying throughout the game.
Gong! The sun sets and the camera pans over at least eleven Coors Light empties, but it's difficult to get a clear count and I'm pretty sure there's more than that. Rob scoffs that John thinks he's going to ride the alliance all the way to the end of the game, and Kathy marvels at how conniving he is. Rob asks, "Who is John, some kind of Marquesan God?" and Kathy again laughs hysterically. Although now she has an excuse: she's so shit-faced she thinks dirt is funny. In a confessional, Kathy smugly tells us that she doesn't know Rob's reason for taking her on as his "soulmate or whatever it is." Maybe because she's the only one there? In any case, it happened very quickly, and she doesn't trust it.
Rob and Kathy drunkenly toast each other, and Kathy is excited that they'll sleep under mosquito netting. She adds, "My God, does that mean that we can sleep without pants on?" and Rob's head snaps around. He looks more cornered now than he's looked once during the whole time they've been out there. Kathy tells him not to panic, and we cut to the dropping of her pants (set to the scrolling of a harp) while Rob makes a huge fuss of looking away. Kathy trips while trying to remove them, and we get a cameraful of ass as she bends over. In a voice-over, Rob tells us he saw "another Sarah" in Kathy, and we're supposed to interpret that sexually, but I refuse to go there.
Now Rob and Kathy lie to each other, and Rob starts a pillow fight. He tells us in a confessional that it will be interesting, because if he "actually do[es] stand by [his] word," the game will change. As they doze off, a cockroach runs by Kathy's foot, representing the changing of the game. Or maybe Rob's cockroach-like reliability. Or how dirty the game of Survivor is, like a cockroach. Or how only Kathy, the cockroach, and a box of Twinkies could survive a nuclear holocaust. Or maybe a cockroach just runs by Kathy's foot. Rob asks whether Kathy will remember their agreement when she wakes up, and she insists that she will. Rob says that it can be the two of them in the end, which Kathy thinks will be a "riot." She proposes, "Let's see if we can do it!" and the light blows out. Now there's a euphemism I am familiar with, although it doesn't mean what they want us to think it means here. But it never does, then, does it?
It's now Day 20, and both Kathy and Rob approach Maraanu's camp on foot. Kathy explains in a voice-over that she and Rob promised not to tell the others that they'd discussed tribal issues. Instead, they'll claim the discussion centered entirely on the new tribe's name and flag. And the lack of pants. As they walk into camp, Rob tells her not to panic, but panicking is pretty much all Kathy does. She voice-overs that they had to get everything out of the camp and onto the raft in five minutes, as we see her walk up to Neleh and Paschal and begin shrieking incomprehensibly, instead of explaining the situation in any sort of helpful way. She then takes off running around the camp, yelling, "Everything! Get the kettles! Get the knives!" Rob, meanwhile, is actually exerting himself for once. Then Neleh and Kathy have a little collision, and Neleh shoves Kathy. It's very deliberate. And funny, too. They're now shaking fruit trees while Rob yells, "Grapefruits coming down!" The raft is completely loaded with goods at this point; I have no idea how it will even float. As the clock, which we don't see -- only hear through Kathy's manic screaming -- winds down, Kathy yells, "Now, Paschal!" and then suddenly they're all hugging each other, because they finished in the allotted time. Rob thinks it's nice to meet Paschal and Neleh, and then acts excited that the four of them did it together. He exclaims, "We're a team -- all of us!" and either he's trying to ingratiate himself into their tribe, or he's genuinely excited to have succeeded. Neleh and Paschal still don't understand, even after Kathy breaks it down monosyllabically: merge. They all float alongside the raft toward Rotwo.
The members of Rotwo wade out to greet the others as they arrive, Rotwo carrying sticks and oars and other potential instruments of assault and battery. Kathy tells us that she returned to Rotwo with hesitancy, and we see her stiff-arm a hug from Tammy as they agree that it's good to see each other. She explains that she was aloof toward her former tribemates because of what "Boston Rob" told her, and she's disappointed that their original loyalties are gone. Zoe and Kathy wring out the flag together, and Kathy is barely civil as Zoe claims that the tribe is so much better now that they've merged into one. Kathy tells us again that since she didn't trust anyone at Rotwo, she was quiet, and hung at the "outer rim." If she'd been quiet to begin with, then she might not have been their target in the first place. Rob is excited to reveal the new buff and flag, but Vecepia is more excited about the new name and hopes it serves the Lord. Rob, pre-emptively defensive, explains that they only had thirty minutes to make the flag; he then announces that the tribe's new name is "Soliantu," but he can't remember what it means. Kathy chimes in, "Sacred allegiance to the sun," which Rob repeats while sounding confused. They do a "Soliantu!" cheer, which is sadly free of cheer hands. The new flag is bright, colorful, and quite possibly plays homage to Barney. Because it's pink. Really pink. I always thought they tried to pick colors consistent to their Survivor locales, but I'm not sure where the hot pink fits in here. And does it bother anyone else that we didn't see Rob and Kathy hashing out the new tribe's name and flag decoration? If indeed this show is about creating a "new society," then wouldn't those elements be key?
Now Robert's name appears now in light pink on the screen as he tells us in a confessional that they got their new name and buffs, which, he unhappily points out, are "uh, pink buffs, uh." He says the women are really happy about it, which I can't imagine is all that true. I mean, pink is fine by me. But hot pink is another story entirely. And do Zoe and Tammy seem like the kind of women who would be particularly excited by the prospect of donning a pink piece of clothing? Robert tells us that "real men don't wear pink," and then we see Tammy teasing him about it. Robert now explains that once they got the raft on shore, the group worked like "busy little beavers." He says they were happy to be back together again and "it was like old times." Aw.
Now Vecepia leads the tribe in a handholding prayer. She thanks God and asks him to keep their spirits high, "for [they] know not what's gonna happen tomorrow." And if she insists on using "gonna" in her prayer, why insist on the "know not" crap? Is there something wrong with "don't know"? She also can't pronounce the tribe's name at the prayer's conclusion, but nevertheless thinks it's worth God's protection. Kathy tells us in a confessional that everyone has their game faces on, and no one wants to talk about what's going on. She then clarifies that no one want to talk to her about it, anyway.
Kathy frolics in the waterfall while wearing head to toe clothing. I guess she's indifferent when presented with appropriate opportunities to remove her pants. She explains that the game has changed because Rotu loyalties have either dissolved or taken on a new shape. She says there is definitely an "undercurrent alliance" formed after the tribal switch-up, but in her heart she still can't believe that "this Rotwo tribe" plans to vote her off. Now Paschal and Kathy work together, and she says she doesn't know what to do. Paschal may be trying to discount Rob's information based on what they know about him, but Kathy insists that there are "powerful people on this beach." The only person with any power out there, as far as I can tell, is Mark Burnett. Kathy says that the others are "playing" her, and that they're "playing" Neleh and Paschal as well. Paschal says he understands that, and then Kathy says she thinks it's time to find out what everyone is thinking and not just wait around to get voted off. A bug-eyed Neleh crab gets washed over by the tide.
Paschal tells us in a confessional that he thinks Rob advised Kathy about Rotwo's plans after they arrived at Rotu. It doesn't occur to him that the two might have had that discussion while they were alone for an entire day and night. Paschal says he told Kathy he'd listen to find out what was going on because he didn't want her to get confrontational at such an early point. Of course, this immediately segues into Kathy getting confrontational. The group sits together and she whines, "By God, it's a game!" and that she doesn't think lying fits into games. Tammy's head spins around so fast she should get checked out for whiplash. Kathy tells the others that she appreciates being told the truth, because she can't deal with lying. Rob looks concerned when Kathy starts talking about "integrity" being a critical part of Survivor. He'll have to look that word up.
A hairless male gets a shirtless backrub from Neleh. Actually, it may be a hairless woman receiving the backrub, but it's night-vision time so it's difficult to tell. Neleh appears to be really into it, so she must be fairly confident that the backrub recipient is cootie-free. Tammy wears her new pink buff and tells us that a few of the S10 thought that lying shouldn't happen in the game, and suggested the motto, "Let's not lie. Ever." Tammy thinks it's great in concept, but not realistic. Vecepia braids Zoe's hair because Zoe doesn't "want any bugs crawling in [her] ears," which, I think, is a reasonable request. As the tribe beds down, various unlikely snuggling partnering ensues. Tammy continues in her voice-over that this is a game about being smart, and that lies might be part of that. She says she went into the game knowing she'd do what she needed to do to win, and that it might entail telling a lie or two. She hopes the others will still like her, and she doesn't intend to lie to their faces, but she does expect to win. In short, her ethics mandate that she only lie behind other people's backs.
It's now Day 21 at pink Soliantu. Rob, Kathy, and Zoe cross paths in the woods, and Rob wants to talk to the two women privately. He asks who they're voting for. Kathy says she hasn't decided yet, but Zoe snaps that it isn't any of his business. Rob howls, "I find you amazing, Zoe!" and Zoe says, "Excuse me?" Rob repeats himself, but I think her "excuse me" had nothing to do with whether she heard him. Rob says that he trusted Zoe, but now everyone is lying. Kathy starts talking about "tribal loyalty" and the "ghost of Rotu," but I'm not sure whether she means Rotu or Rotwo loyalties. Rob responds, "Right. But that wasn't the way it was supposed to be, was it, Zoe?" Rob is very good about using people's names when addressing them, which is a business technique, but also something he overuses -- kind of like Sean would on Felicity. He names all of the Rotwos individually as complicit to the Kathy-outing agreement, and Zoe unconvincingly plays dumb. Too bad it's not Neleh, who wouldn't have to play at anything. Zoe says, "Agreement about..." and insists that she doesn't "remember" such a conversation. She then says, "How do you ever get that?" and Rob parrots her in disbelief. Rob rants that he'll tell everyone tonight, but I'm not sure who he thinks he'll be telling. He then wants a yes or no answer regarding whether Zoe said she'd vote for Kathy, and she pauses for about twenty seconds before answering, "No." He says, "You paused. And you lied," then claims that he did see it coming; he had only a small amount of trust to begin with, "and it completely got shattered." Well, better to shatter a shot glass than a mirror, I guess. Kathy then stomps off while ranting that everyone is lying. It sounds like Rob might call her "hysterical," but I'm not entirely sure. Then Kathy yells, "I haven't lied once, man! I don't know what this stupid game's about, but I'm outta here!" The others trail behind, Zoe still claiming innocence. She says she doesn't know what Rob wants from her, and he says he's irritated that she's lied to him over and over again. The cameras follow Kathy all paparazzi-like as she snits off through the woods and then -- still fully clothed -- belly-flops into the water and symbolically washes herself clean. She tells us in a frenzied confessional that "they're all lying to me," adding, "And I'm being played as a pawn? A pawn!" She says she believes Rob even though it doesn't make any sense to her, and that she needs immunity. She then rocks back and forth in the water and mumbles to herself while repeatedly shaking her head.
Platforms float in the water, and the S10 approach. Sean looks tired and sweaty from the exertion of walking. It turns out that this is an immunity challenge, and Peachy takes back the idol, which he may or may not call "Victor." He displays the new individual immunity necklace, which is no longer a dog collar. The platforms rock and bob to and fro on the water, and Peachy says they'll need "good sea legs" to win the challenge. He explains that the S10 will perch on individual platforms, and that whoever remains standing for the longest time wins. The only body parts that can touch the platform are their feet. The S10 randomly draw numbers to determine which platforms they'll stand on, and wade out.
Peachy begins the challenge, and as they rise from crouched positions, it's clear that this will be easier for some than for others. Neleh touches her platform almost immediately, and is quickly followed by Robert. The others employ different techniques for balancing, including uncontrolled leg-shaking by Paschal, and a curious tongue-extension method by Sean. Zoe's steady rocking side to side seems most effective. Neleh "nanny nanny boo boo"s from the sidelines; then Paschal and Vecepia fall, and Peachy points out that Vecepia's backstroking to the beach. Zoe now wriggles her butt around like my dog does when she wants to be scratched, and Sean air-humps in response. For once, they look like they're having fun. John comes really, really close to falling off, but then saves himself, meriting an air kiss from Zoe. John never appears to achieve any sort of natural balance or ease during this challenge, so it's amazing that he holds on as long as he does. Sean then lightly touches his platform, and hopes no one saw, but Peachy did, so he's eliminated. Tammy is doing the butterfly in the air while Zoe gets just a little too comfortable and ends up tipping over. The sidelines wanted her to win, evidently, and hiss and boo over it. Kathy is doing okay, meanwhile, with her own balancing method, which is to squat with her butt pushed back and her arms extended out front, periodically making quick, full circles with both arms. No one said it was pretty, but it appears to work okay. Then Rob almost falls and Neleh screams at him, so he screams back. Neleh's razzing is really obnoxious, I think. Rob follows Zoe's demonstration and also gets cocky; he bends over to splash one of the others, but loses his balance. The sidelined members of Soliantu are very excited about this, and Robert says, "I told you about bein' a wise-ass!" Soon Tammy is eliminated as well, and just John and Kathy remain in the game. Robert points out that John has stumbled repeatedly, but still manages to remain on the platform; he then nestles with Paschal. John looks very uncomfortable; he has bad posture, too. Suddenly he bends over to pick up what appears to be a hat on the platform. Either he touches the platform directly, or touching the hat on the platform counts the same as actually touching the platform, so he's out. Peachy chides, "You lost your concentration, John," so Kathy wins, and Rob leads the cheering, which actually seems earnest. Kathy flops off her platform and swims over to Peachy, who struggles to haul her ass onto his larger, steadier platform.
A human skull means we're at Maraanu. A cow skull means we're at Soliantu, after Kathy has donned the immunity necklace and been sufficiently hugged. Rob drinks from a coconut, and says it's terrible to live with "these people" as they merge. He thinks Kathy must have "blabbed" to John and "ratted" him out. Still, he says, John is "slick, but he's not as smart as he thinks he is." Then he smashes a coconut and wishes it was John's head. Rob tells us that it's impossible to keep secrets in the game once it's turned individual, and that John will be "exposed" within the two Tribal Councils. He thinks the game is about figuring out "what buttons to push on what people." And coming from someone who's pushed all the wrong buttons so far in this game, it's an interesting comment.
Rob and Sean now block John's path in the woods, and then beat the crap out of him. Okay, so they don't, but they want to. John says he has no idea whom he's voting for, and Rob says he thought they'd agreed to take the others out one by one. The tattoo on John's arm is either a globe on a pedestal, or a cute long-legged alien. Rob wants to know what happened to John's promises, and John claims it was "all good" until Rob told Kathy the plan. Rob denies having said anything to Kathy, but John says he won't have this conversation. He doesn't want his "face lied to," and stalks off. Sean and Rob scream things like "Now it's on, man!" and "Now it's personal!" and then John stomps back. Back at camp, it looks like the others can hear the argument, and Tammy looks perplexed. John says he would have been fine with voting off Kathy if the others hadn't betrayed him -- and, I suppose, if she hadn't won immunity; then Sean wants to know why John didn't come to him "man to man." Meanwhile, Vecepia looks haggard as she cuts a coconut and laments again, "Too much drama." Suddenly, Sean is off on one of his typical rampages, and I'm too tired even to try to understand what he's saying, but it sounds like he might be defending the Moppet's honor. He then starts violently slamming his fist in his hand, which more likely than not is of some concern to John. Rob says that John shouldn't have made an agreement with him and then broken that agreement just because Rob had considered doing exactly the same thing. John wonders if he's supposed to be naïve about Rob's intentions, and then denies that he's playing both sides. He stomps off again -- more successfully this time -- with Rob yelling at his back, "Everything's comin' out tonight!" John says over his shoulder that "it's already out," and Rob screams, "This here's gettin' clean!" John says he has no worries because he's already clean. Rob doesn't tell him to check again behind his ears and underneath his fingernails.
Back at camp, Robert insists that he's only been true to himself and claims, "I keep my word to me." He tells Rob, "I told nobody [sic] nothing." Then, making for yet another possible TWoP t-shirt slogan, he concludes, "I'm The General, and that's that." Rob tells us that the game is difficult because they're constantly looking for new angles, and that everyone is lying. Sean explains in a confessional that, five years ago, he would have been worse than Rob and probably would have wanted to push John into "that freakin' fire." Hee. Should that not be funny? He's upset now, though, because he and John have shared the bonds of blackness and gayness outside the game. He says they have "self-disclosed stuff" to each other, and that John's deceit is "really hurtful" to him.
Neleh deliberates over what outfit to wear to Tribal Council, then Kathy smells a flower and then rests her head in Robert's armpit, which must result in a most delightful fusion of scents. Kathy tells us that Rotu is back to this "love tribe/happy family thing," but she doesn't know if they're sincere about it, and it's "flippin 'her out." John then feeds Kathy some line about Day 1 being different from Day 21, and they hug. She tells us she has to keep telling herself it's a game to maintain the "kissy and love-y" feeling.
Tribal walk, followed by tribal trill. Peachy welcomes and congratulates them: if they survive tonight's vote, they are guaranteed a place in the jury as well as a chance to be the winner of the game. Peachy wants to know whether there's a different mindset post-merge, and Vecepia says it's different to compete as a group compared to one-on-one. Duh. Sean says he feels like "the outsider" because the merge is a reunion of old tribe members; his mood is a mixture of emotions, but he can't speak for the others. Who knew he could even speak for himself? He then says, "Since I came over, I felt like..." and Peachy cuts him off to ask Zoe about what Sean just said. Sean twitches while Zoe basically says she's sorry that he feels that way, but it's his problem. Robert says he'll never do anything to compromise his values because he's "not a youngster" and his "word is all [he's] got." I wished he'd say "I'm The General and that's that again," but he didn't. He should really just say that anytime someone asks him anything. Peachy points out that John told him earlier in the game that he'd always be honest. John says that his "personal rule" was that he'd talk to anyone about anything as long as they're truthful with each other. He says that when another member of the tribe agrees to one thing and then wavers, though, it's the same as lying. Rob is happy with the way he's played; he doesn't even pause before admitting that he's lied during the game. Peachy wants to know whether the others have lied to him, and Rob answers that they definitely have. He says that "people sitting here telling you right now that they have not lied -- they have lied." They know who they are, so he feels no need to out them, which is totally inconsistent from his ranting earlier that everything was coming out. I think someone got to Rob. In any case, he says that they need to be able to look at themselves in the mirror. If they're happy with the way they've played, it's fine by him. Peachy now reveals that there's a new facet to the game: whoever wins immunity "own[s]" it, which means it can be given away to another member of the tribe for any reason. No one looks surprised by this information, so maybe they knew the change was coming. Kathy says that after what she went through today, she's most certainly not comfortable giving up the necklace. She says that she thinks their original loyalties are gone and she hopes to work through that with the others, but right now immunity remains very important to her.
And so, the vote: John votes for "Boston Rob" because he tried to stir up trouble. He says he knew from the start that Rob was not trustworthy, and also claims that Rob "attacked [him] personally," so he's more than happy to cast this vote.
Rob votes for "Johnny" and congratulates him on playing well. Still, he hopes "things swing right," and that John will soon be gone; he'll see him on the "flip side."
As Sean casts his vote for John, he says, "Yo, look here man." He claims that John "dissed [him] and [his] boy," and he doesn't care if he's the to go because of this vote. Jeez, I kind of, dare I say, respect him for that one.
Vecepia votes for "R.M." because they came into the merge without the right numbers; she says she'll soon have to pony up and give all the former members of Maraamu pizza and beer. So the tribe must have made a bet that the last standing member would buy the others a meal. She doesn't apologize for casting the vote, which seems kind of crappy, and I wonder what she'd do if it had been her and God and the numbers had been wrong?
So Peachy has tallied, and there's little suspense. Two votes for Rob lead to a pleased look from Zoe and a smug look from Neleh. John actually laughs when his named is called the first time, and Rob look just a little bit hopeful while Sean looks sideways at John. One more vote for John, a couple more for Rob, and a surprise vote for "Z.Z.," who is Zoe. She shakes her head and looks perplexed. Then Rob gets his fifth vote, and it's all over -- no need to read any more. John snickers. He doesn't eat a Snickers, but I'm sure that comes later since Snickers is a sponsor. Rob grins and wishes the others luck, then shlubs off into the night. Peachy congratulates the others for -- after a series of terrible choices -- actually getting one right. He says they've made it twenty-one days, reached the final nine, and the victor's fate is in their hands.
In case you were considering ordering a hot pink tribal buff, but were concerned that people would mistake the buff for a bandanna, you should be aware that the "buff" is visibly labeled as such. Likewise, all my hats are clearly marked with the word "Hat."
week: Zoe continues to lie -- badly -- to Kathy. We're supposed to think Neleh is upset with Paschal, but most likely she's annoyed at someone else. Then Peachy tells the S9 to go fly a kite.
Over the closing credits, we learn that Kathy cast the vote for Zoe. Then Rob confesses his love for all the others, and hopes they can still be friends. Go on, Rob, tell me another.