And baby makes five

S04E11

Samantha is at the Hermes store, asking to see the Birkin bag. The salesman tells her the bag costs four thousand dollars, and that there's also a waiting list to get the bag and it will take her five years to get to the top. Samantha is as shocked as I am, because in five years that bag isn’t going to be the status symbol it is now. Carrie tells us that Samantha isn't one for waiting, and Samantha tells the salesman that the bag is for Lucy Liu, and she wanted Lucy to wear the bag to a premiere week where it would be photographed. The salesman goes to get their PR person on the phone.

Carrie then tells us that Charlotte didn’t want to wait either, as we see Charlotte make an appointment with a fertility doctor for testing.

Miranda then makes an appointment with her doctor over the phone, but she can’t make herself say the word "abortion," so she says that she is pregnant and "needs not to be." Well, we all know that in the sitcom world, if you can’t say "abortion," you certainly can’t get one.

Samantha walks out of a building and onto the sidewalk, and she sees a middle-aged woman in a track suit with the Birkin bag she wants, so she calls the Hermes PR woman and asks why it is taking so "fucking long" to get the bag, and that Lucy Liu is a "fucking star" and a "fucking nobody" has the bag they want, and she wonders if "Hermes" means "we take our fucking time." There are times when Samantha says "fuck" and it works. This time, it does not work. It sounds like Kim Cattrall is just reading from a cue card. If I were the PR person on the other end of the line, I would have just hung up on her.

Oh, good God! Carrie walks into her apartment wearing a scrunchie with her hair and hair extensions in a high ponytail, a micro-mini Catholic school skirt, a white lacy halter top with black bra, a big white jacket, and white high heels with beige fishnet socks. And she is holding her Gucci fanny pack. You know, you keep asking yourself, "Can the outfits get any worse on this show?" and then your question is answered with a horrified "yes!" I swear, year, if talk-show hosts keep blithering about the fashion trends SATC starts, I will poke the hosts in their eyes with hot daggers. There is no way anyone who isn’t mentally handicapped would look at the outfits worn this season and try to wear the same things. So Carrie is looking at mail while walking across her apartment, and she turns around and screeches. Did she walk past a mirror and see what she was wearing? Oh, no, it's Steve -- he's there because he and CIM were playing basketball, and CIM had to go to the bathroom. Is there only one basketball court in the city, and it's right by Carrie’s place? Carrie feels all uncomfortable in front of Steve. Steve asks how Miranda is, because she won’t answer his calls. Carrie just ignores him and runs into the bathroom where CIM is. She whispers to CIM and asks if he told Steve about Miranda, because he's asking Carrie about her. CIM tells her that Steve always asks about Miranda. Carrie whispers that it's okay if he told because it's obvious that she can’t keep secrets either, and CIM whispers that he didn’t tell Steve, even though he thinks Steve should know what's going on and he wishes he didn’t know. They have a whisper argument about Steve and Miranda and whatever, and Carrie is acting psycho about Steve listening to what they are talking about and tells CIM to leave, so he does.