Drama Queens

S03E07

Charlotte and Carrie go to the opera together, and while they are in the lobby Charlotte calls Dennis one more time to leave a Dennis another message saying that he really messed up Phil's life by not introducing them, and this time Dennis picks up the phone and tells her that he was on a business trip and couldn't call her back. He tells her he will set up a meeting with her and Phil the night, and after they hang up Charlotte feels silly for creating all that drama in her head. I think something else is going on in her head, and I don't think it is drama.

Samantha and the good doctor are in bed, and he takes a Viagra, and Samantha decides to take a pill too and see what happens. Carrie tells us, "Twenty minutes later, Samantha officially became the first woman to land on the moon," as Samantha is bouncing around on the doctor. He looks scared as Samantha starts howling.

And her howling turns into opera singing, specifically Aida, as Charlotte and Carrie, still chewing gum like a cow, are sitting at the opera watching the show. Charlotte gives Carrie her opera glasses and she starts looking around at people in the audience. She sees Mr. Big staring at her with his opera glasses, and Big waves at her. Carrie tells Charlotte she doesn't feel well and runs off. Big sees her leave and tries to catch her, but he misses her.

Carrie wakes up in the middle of the night and calls Miranda and tells her about seeing Big. After some more babbling, Carrie tells Miranda that she wants to be with a man who wants to be with her. Miranda tells her to tell that to CIM.

In the morning, Carrie calls CIM at work, but he isn't there. Gee, since his parents are in town, maybe he is with them? Duh, Carrie! That night she calls him at home, and gets an answering machine message that says "Hey, I'm not in, but Pete is. [insert dog bark]" If I had a boyfriend that had a lame answering machine message like that, I would never call him unless I knew for sure that he was home. She leaves a message saying she was just calling to say hello. The dog hears her voice and starts humping the phone. In a voiceover, she starts whining that she thinks she blew it with CIM. Like that's a bad thing?

Because Miranda is a glutton for punishment, she is doing laundry again. But this time, Steve decides to have Miranda put some skid marks on the dryer by lifting her on the machine and groping her, and yells, "Race you for the orgasm! One, two, three, go!"

Charlotte goes into a bar that seems to be inhabited only by men wearing suits, and she is going around asking various men if they are Phil, and she bumps into Dennis. Dennis tells her he didn't call Phil, because he is in love with her himself and wants to start something with her. Charlotte gets upset, slaps Dennis, and runs out of the bar and into the street trying to catch a cab. She trips and falls in front of a moving cab, which screeches to a halt in front of her. Kyle MacLachlan runs out of the cab to help her. Their eyes meet, and sparks fly. Carrie tells us, "And that's how, in the most dramatic fashion, Charlotte met her new leading man." Yeah, the leading man from Showgirls. Should we now start calling Charlotte Nomi Malone?