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Keela gets out of the hospital and seems to be okay. Laura tries to get Franco to seek help for his addiction. Franco talks to Tommy about going to NA, and Tommy tries to point him in the right direction, but also tries to get info on Franco's Vicodin source. Garrity accompanies Franco to an NA meeting and finds lots of hot messed-up women. Just his style. Lou runs into Sondra and makes up a relationship so that she'll be attracted to him, since she only likes unavailable men. Tommy advises Lou to hire a hooker to continue his ruse with Sondra. Amazingly, it works. Chief meets Pete's life partner, and later comes home while they're getting it on. Awkward. Pa Gavin's new wife tries to homeschool Tommy's kids while Uncle Teddy plays security. Tommy saves a young boy from a fire and then keeps vigil at his bedside. While there, he has a conversation with Jesus. Tommy claims to be a non-believer, and Jesus says he'll try to heal the burned kid if Tommy will try to have faith. The kid's mom urges Tommy to spend time with his kids while he can, which is ironic, because Tommy is at the hospital with a stranger instead of with his kids. Sheila shows up at the firehouse and Tommy couldn't care less, until she drops a hint that she's dating a woman. That's not going to help her to get pregnant again. Tommy, Johnny, and Mick go to a youth baseball game that Father Liam Murphy, the Gavins' half-brother, is organizing. Mick gets a funny feeling about Father Murphy and his young male charges. Tommy and Johnny accidentally hit on their half-sister. Once they find out the truth, they're kind of still into her. Want more? The full recap starts right below!
Nighttime at the firehouse. Lou snores away peacefully, but Tommy is tossing and turning. There are clanking pipes all over the place. Tommy finally throws a pillow at Lou to wake him, and Lou mutters, "What, waffles again?" Tommy asks if Lou can't hear the clanking noise, and Lou agrees that it's annoying but prepares to go back to sleep. Why are they sleeping in the boiler room, anyway? I guess because they really aren't supposed to be there. Tommy exclaims, "Ting-tang. Ching-chong. It's like being at a Chinese graduation ceremony." Lou yawns and says that you get used to it, but Tommy doesn't think he can. Tommy says he's going to the lounge, and Lou says they can't get busted by Grinch. Tommy yells at Lou for snoring, and Lou suggests that Tommy go to a hotel, but Tommy won't, because then he'd have access to a mini-bar. They don't have any alcohol in the firehouse? Lou tells Tommy to go to the House of a Thousand Cats, but Tommy says that his dad starts drinking early in the day, so that won't work. Tommy starts babbling that he needs peace and quiet to figure out his life, and Lou falls right back to sleep in the middle of that monologue.
Franco and Laura leave the hospital with Keela, who's in a wheelchair. Franco thinks Laura for being there, and Laura says it's no problem, and gets ready to go home. Franco suggests that she come home with them, and Laura gets into the cab with Franco and Keela.
Tommy goes up to the lounge and prepares to pop some pills. Jesus is there, and he offers to lend Tommy his cross to bear. Tommy ignores him and downs the pills. Jesus comments that Tommy's stash is getting kind of low, so they'll probably be spending a lot more time together. Tommy says it won't happen tonight.
Tommy sneaks into the main garage area, where Grinch is sawing some Zs at the dispatch desk. Tommy quietly climbs into one of the trucks, where he lays out his pillow and prepares to snooze.
Keela sleeps in her bed. Franco sits on the floor nearby and looks guilty. Laura peeks in to check on him.
As Tommy sleeps, the alarm goes off and a bunch of guys climb into the truck. Tommy escapes just in time to avoid detection.
Tommy goes to a meeting and sits down to Mick. As a woman speaks up front about her experiences, Tommy spots the guy who keeps bugging him about his various aliases. He tries to call Mick's attention to the guy, but Mick ignores him. Tommy thinks the guy is one of Grinch's moles. The guy does that gesture where you point at your eyes with two fingers, and then point at someone else with one. (It usually means, "I'm watching you.") Tommy does the gesture back with increasing sarcasm. The guy mouths "Jerk off" and "Blow me" to Tommy, so Tommy stands up and pushes the guy into the refreshment table. The guy wonders what Tommy's damage is, and Tommy says that Grinch can kiss his ass. The guy, of course, has no idea what Tommy is talking about, and claims that he was telling Tommy to take off his sunglasses. Tommy apologizes to everyone and takes off his sunglasses. The guy asks for a hand up from the floor, and Tommy says he wasn't born yesterday, and repeats his message for Grinch.
Chief walks into his kitchen and sees someone working under the sink. He assumes it's his son, Pete, but it's actually a dude named Steve. After yelling at the guy for a while, Chief finds out that Steve is Pete's partner. Chief shakes Steve's hand, and says that due to Jeannie's situation, Steve isn't the first stranger that Chief has run across in his house. Steve understands, and Chief is very amicable, considering his usual feelings about Pete's sexual orientation. Steve notes that we never know how long we have in this life, and Chief thinks that's exactly the attitude and Steve and Pete should take in their...business. Ah. He thinks Steve is Pete's business partner, not his life partner. Chief wants to know more about this business, and Steve mulls over how to answer this question. Pete shows up and gives Steve a big hug, and Chief finally figures it out.
Lou runs into Sandra at a bakery, and she makes small talk with him. Lou tries to get through the awkwardness. Sandra reports that she's just getting out of a relationship with a soap actor, and that good-looking men are high-maintenance. Sandra also couldn't stand the guy's wife, but she thinks the relationship was hot because it was so wrong. Paula Devicq looks a little less Skeletor than on her last appearance, but her hair is just bad. Too blonde and greasy. She also needs to ease up on the Botox. Lou says that he sold his house and can't buy another one until his divorce gets settled. Sandra doesn't care, and wants to know if Lou is dating anyone. Lou lies that he's dating a woman named Linda. He describes her very specifically, which is a bad idea because then he can't pretend with a photo of his cousin or something later. Lou describes how great Linda is, and then get to the part that Sandra wants to hear when he says that Linda is "a little possessive."
Connor and Katie are hanging out at the House of a Thousand Cats. Connor sneezes, probably due to the aforementioned Thousand Cats. Pa yells at Teddy, who is sitting near the door. Teddy reports that he has a direct line to the security guy at the front desk, in case "Janet tries to bum-rush the place." I can't tell you how much I enjoy the phrase "bum-rush," for some reason. I use it all the time. Almost as much as I say "grody." I'm clearly living in the past. Anyway, Connor sneezes, and Pa yells at him for sneezing, and Mrs. Ng yells at Pa for yelling. There's just a lot of yelling. Mrs. Ng suggests that Pa help her teach the children, so apparently she's homeschooling them. Colleen walks in and reports that the computer crashed again and now she'll never finish her report. Mrs. Ng can afford that place and all those cats and she can't buy a new computer?
Teddy says he's out of there. He runs into Tommy in the hallway and is shocked that Tommy got by the guy at the front desk. Tommy quietly tries to remind Teddy about the pill thing they talked about recently, and Teddy promises to make sure that "Miami Mike" gets in touch with him. I don't think I want anyone named "Miami Mike" getting in touch with me for any reason, and not just because it reminds me of Fratty Mike from The Real World.
Tommy walks into the House of a Thousand Cats, and no one reacts at all. He chastises his kids for not greeting him. Tommy walks over and just stares at his father, who has just received a fresh alcoholic beverage from a butler or something. Mrs. Ng anticipates a fresh confrontation and gets the Gavin kids out of the room. Pa offers to give Tommy some money to help him to get started on his own place. Tommy says he'll get it all figured out in a few weeks, and Pa relents. Tommy thinks it's going pretty well, and Pa relaxes and talks about how Mrs. Ng is "a whiz at math" because -- and I know you see this one coming -- she's Asian. Tommy wants to make sure Teddy has the place "completely locked down," because Janet could really cause problems if she shows up. Pa just takes a sip of his drink, and Tommy asks if Pa is just drinking all day now. Pa says he's old, retired, and married to "a much younger woman who's not only rich but likes to bang [his] brains out at least three times a week." He explains that he's not drinking; he's in a perpetual toast.
Franco, on his cell phone outside the firehouse, asks his mother if Keela brushed her teeth. Franco, with the vehemence of someone who recently almost lost everything, says he loves both his mother and Keela, and hangs up. Laura walks out and asks after Keela, and then says that she's worried about Franco. Unbeknownst to them, Garrity overhears the whole conversation. Laura says that they keep pretending this whole thing was about Keela making it, but they aren't talking about the other situation. Franco says that there aren't any pills left in his apartment. Laura says that Franco needs to talk to someone, and that she understands if it's not her. Franco just says, "Yeah," and walks off.
Lou tells Tommy about seeing Sandra the other day, and how he was caught off guard, so he tried to channel Tommy. Tommy gets pissed off and reminds Lou that he told the guys that when they get the urge to channel Tommy, they should pretend to take a piss and call him. Lou adds that he knows Tommy has a gift, and that it can't be learned. Lou reports that he described his imaginary girlfriend, but that the problem is that he could never get such a girl. Lou thinks that Sandra bought it, but now she wants to see him out with this girlfriend. Tommy says that God invented whores for just this situation. Lou says, "I never even thought of whores!" Hee. Tommy says another firefighter told him about a website where you can choose a whore from a bunch of pictures, thought it's costly. Lou says that Tommy really does have a gift. Tommy says, "Yeah, from God or Satan. That's the problem with gifts. No card, no credit."
The alarm sounds, and the crew heads out to a fire. Once they get inside, Tommy brings a young kid outside and hands him off to some paramedics. He tells Franco that he gave the kid mouth-to-mouth, and thinks he'll be okay. Franco looks at Tommy's face and tries to say something but isn't quite sure how to phrase it. Finally, Franco just blurts it out: "The kid's lips. They're, uh, stuck to yours." Tommy actually peels the kid's lips off his mouth. EW!
Tommy tosses some stuff into his locker and then looks around. When he doesn't see anyone nearby, he quickly opens Franco's locker and starts rooting around, looking for pills. He doesn't find anything, and Franco walks into the room, so Tommy aborts the search. They trade opinions on the lip thing (consensus: it was fucked up), and then Franco says that he needs to talk to Tommy about the pills. Tommy starts to try to explain why he took them, but Franco interrupts to say that things have been getting away from him, and that he needs to get clean. Tommy realizes that they were talking about two different things, and agrees that Franco needs to get clean. Franco tells Tommy what happened to Keela, and to Tommy's credit, he looks genuinely horrified and concerned. Franco says he's having a harder time kicking the habit than he thought he would. Tommy tells Franco to throw away his stash, and then looks at Franco hopefully. Franco says he already tossed them. Tommy asks if Franco really got rid of all of the pills, and Franco is sure he did. Franco asks about NA meetings, and Tommy says they often have them in the same places as AA meetings, but he's really still wondering if all the pills are really gone. Franco asks Tommy to go to Franco's first NA meeting with him, and Tommy says that he can't do it tomorrow because he promised his "new half-brother" that he'd do something. Tommy thinks Garrity would go with Franco, and Franco seems a little disappointed, but agrees. Tommy comes up with a bullshit idea, and tells Franco that he needs to know about "the thirteenth step." Tommy claims that, as Franco's sponsor, Franco needs to give Tommy the phone numbers of any of his drug sources, so that Tommy can "shut that right down." Franco doesn't seem that dumb, but he falls for it, and gives Tommy the name and number of his source.
Garrity walks into the lunch room, sits down, and stares at Lou. Lou finally asks, "What?" Garrity answers, "It's my cock," and Lou's like, "I'm out." Garrity explains that he has two dead chicks on his conscience, Nez and Heather, and that he thinks that maybe his "dick is some sort of weapon of mass destruction." Lou says that can't be true. Lou breaks down the problem: "You have a tiny fragment of brain matter lodged somewhere in your skull, no offense." Garrity: "None taken." Lou says that the second problem is Garrity's dating pool, which "should be drained and filled and paved over, with maybe a playground for poor kids built on top of it." Garrity says he's being serious, but Lou thinks it was just "a string of bad luck," and that Garrity just needs to get back on the horse. Lou assures Garrity that there's nothing wrong with either his dick or his mojo. Garrity seems relieved, and walks out of the room as if he's going to go find a new lady friend right now. As Garrity leaves, Lou asks him to stay away from Lou's nieces.
Sheila stands across the street from the firehouse, near Tommy's truck, waiting. She spots Tommy walking out of the house and marches up and confronts him. She wants to know what Jimmy said, but Tommy says she has no right to know anything. Sheila calls Tommy "sub-scum" and says that he should be ashamed of what he did to her, and Jimmy, and Damien. Sheila might be a little drunk. She claims that she's going to scream so that everyone will come out of the firehouse and see the two of them together. Uh, I think that ship has sailed. Tommy tells her as much, comparing their secret relationship to 9/11 because "nobody cares" and they've "all moved on." Sheila doesn't believe him, and walks to the middle of the street and screams. Nothing. She spits out her gum and screams again. Garrity and Lou walk out of the house, see that it's Sheila, and pleasantly say hello. Sheila looks disappointed and waves back. Tommy starts to get into his truck and tells Sheila to move on. Sheila says that she already has, to "greener frickin' pastures." Tommy wishes the guy luck, since he'll need it. Sheila retorts, "No, she won't." Tommy is suddenly interested, and calls after Sheila, who walks away. He half-heartedly calls out, "Have another drink, bitch."
Tommy sits in the hospital room of the kid whose life he saved (and lips he stole). The kid's mom says she's going to get coffee, and offers Tommy some. Once she's gone, Tommy sees Jesus sitting nearby. Jesus says he knows what happened, but he doesn't know why. Tommy thinks the whole mystery of God's plan is a bunch of crap. Tommy claims that he doesn't believe in Jesus or God either. Jesus says simply, "I'm sorry." He pauses, and then asks, "You want the kid to live?" Tommy clearly does, and Jesus says he'll see what he can do. Tommy requests "full use of the hands," and Jesus chuckles that he'll see what he can do. Before he leaves, Jesus wants to know, if he can make this happen, will Tommy believe in God and trust that he has a plan? Tommy says he'll try, and Jesus is apparently satisfied with that.
Tommy, Johnny, and Mick sit on a park bench and watch some kids playing baseball. Incidentally, Johnny has his legs spread further apart than I've ever seen a man sit. Either Dean Winters has got a lot going on, or he wants you to think he's got a lot going on, or he's extremely flexible, or some combination thereof. Father Murph, the new Gavin half-brother, is organizing the game. Johnny's drinking a beer, even though according to Tommy's conversation with Franco, it's morning. Tommy asks the other two if either of them needs a roommate, because he needs a place to stay. Johnny points out that Tommy could live with the kids he risked his neck to get back, but Tommy thinks Pa Gavin's got too much on his hands already. Mick says that his girlfriend has kind of moved in. Johnny says he's got his kids this weekend, and suggests that Tommy talk to Father Murph. Tommy thinks a rectory would be a bad place for him to stay, given his heathenism. Father Murph comes over and gives the guys some burgers. A pre-teen named Ricky walks up and asks if they can start the game. Father Murph introduces Ricky as their "most devout altar boy" who will "make a fine priest one day." Johnny and Tommy are engrossed in their burgers as Father Murph and Ricky walk off, but Mick is engrossed in the fact that Father Murph and Ricky seem a little too close.
Garrity joins Franco at an NA meeting. Franco thinks the whole thing is a bad idea, because he doesn't like to bare his soul. Garrity is psyched about the "smorgasbord of ass" available in the meeting. Franco says that "pussy is taking a back seat" to coping with his drug addiction at the moment. Garrity excuses himself to go mingle.
Back at the baseball game, Johnny waxes philosophical about how great Father Murph is for organizing this whole thing for a bunch of kids who have nowhere to go and nothing to do. Johnny even thinks Father Murph should become Pope. Ricky hits the ball, and Jesus scoops the ball up at shortstop and makes the out. Heh. Johnny pops open a new beer, and Tommy says that it bothers him a little. Johnny promises to get rid of it, which he does by chugging the whole bottle. Tommy notices a hot chick nearby and points her out to Johnny. They both exclaim over how hot she is, and walk over to talk to her. Johnny calls dibs, because he has a gun. Tommy gets there first and introduces himself to the woman, Mariel. He then totally rips off Johnny's speech from moments ago about how great Father Murph is for helping the kids. Johnny just stands there, stunned. Father Murph walks up and says it's good that the boys met their sister. So this must be the former DQ employee. Tommy and Johnny try and fail to hide their disappointment.
Garrity meets a chick out in the hallway and claims that he's in NA. So is she. She asks if it's his first meeting, and Garrity says he's been going for years. She asks, "Coke?" Garrity responds, "No, thanks. I'm not thirsty." Heh. She tries again and asks why he's there. Garrity says it was crack, and spins a tale about how one time he was in an alley, smoking a pipe, and he realized that it was "wack."
Back in the meeting, people are sharing their stories. The leader calls on Franco, who looks like he might crap his pants, and walks out.
Tommy calls Franco's source, the nurse. He gets a beep and switches to the call. It's Katie, and she says that they're at the park with Mrs. Ng, and she wishes Tommy were there. She also misses her mother. Tommy says he misses her too, and that he'll see Katie soon. Katie asks him to tuck her in tonight. Tommy says that he has to work. Katie brings up how Janet didn't work, and Tommy tries to explain that mommies and daddies have different jobs. Tommy desperately tries to get off the phone so that he can stop talking to the child he risked his neck to bring back to New York. He promises that he'll see her tomorrow, and Katie says that he always promises. Tommy claims that it's different this time, and Katie hangs up on him.
In the locker room, Garrity finds Mike and asks if he can keep a secret. Mike: "Not really." Heh. Dumb and Dumber go back and forth for a while, and Garrity blurts out that Franco has a drug problem. But that's not the good part. Garrity reports that he went to an NA meeting with Franco, and that it was "packed with tail." Garrity thinks it was great that the chicks were vulnerable, "like putty in your hands, except the kind of putty you have sex with." Mike: "I didn't know they made that kind of putty." Garrity shows off the phone number he got, and Mike asks to go to the meeting with him time. Garrity is more than happy to share the wealth.
Mick shows up at the firehouse to return Tommy's sunglasses, since he left them at the park. Tommy thinks that's a feeble excuse, and Mick sits down and sighs, "Father Murphy." Tommy still thinks Father Murph is a great guy, and uses it as an opportunity to segue into a conversation about Mariel, and how hot she is. Mick says that Johnny already called him to find out "where the church stood on half-brother/half-sister relations." Tommy pretends to be outraged, and then asks where the church stands. Mick tells Tommy to ask his new pal, Father Murph. Tommy thinks Mick is jealous. Mick brings up his suspicions about Father Murph and Ricky. Tommy tells him to relax, but Mick is sure he's right.
Tommy's back in the hospital with the Burn Victim Kid (BVK) and BVK's mom. BVK is still unconscious. BVK's mom gives a long speech about how she took her time with her son for granted, and just worked really hard to save up money. She asks if Tommy has kids, and whether he spends a lot of time with them. Tommy makes a joke about his three kids. BVK's mom says seriously, "You've gotta spend time with them, Tommy. Enjoy them while you can." Tommy stares at her as she kneels down and starts praying, and then he makes a quick exit.
Chief arrives home. He hears sex noises from upstairs and assumes that Jeannie has made another new friend. He runs upstairs and opens Jeannie's bedroom door, only to find her alone and asleep. The noises continue, and Chief realizes that it's Peter and his partner. He hears Peter yelling, "Do me, Daddy! Do me, hard!"
Chief sits downstairs in the kitchen. Steven comes down and tries to make conversation, but Chief won't speak. Peter walks in and seems surprised that his father is home. Chief still won't speak. Steven asks if Chief wants to go to the Mets game with them, which is sweet, considering how Peter said he'd love to go to a game with his dad sometime. Chief finally speaks, and says that he's lived in his house for forty years, and never considered selling it, but that now all his happy memories have been washed away. Peter makes the mistake of saying "Daddy," and Chief explodes that Peter shouldn't ever use that word again, and then pretends he's mad that Peter did it with his mother right down the hall. If Peter were with a woman, I'm sure Chief would just chuckle and slap his back and congratulate him. Peter says that he and Steven express their love like anyone else. Chief says he can't stand to look at his son, and Peter says that the feeling is mutual. Jeannie walks in and says that all of her boys are up and waiting for their breakfast. Chief turns away from his son and says that Peter needs to go. On his way out, he whispers his true concern to Peter: "You told me you were the man."
Tommy is driving when his phone rings. It's Miami Mike. Tommy pulls over to take the call.
Meanwhile, Teddy waits on the sidewalk in front of the House of a Thousand Cats with the three Gavin kids. Connor complains that Tommy is late again, and Teddy promises that he'll be there soon.
Tommy finishes his call and sees Jesus riding shotgun. Tommy explains that he needs the pills for his hand so that he can save people at work. Jesus calls Tommy "a real man" and "a real hero." Tommy gets pissed and starts driving erratically down the street. Jesus gets nervous, probably at how bad the blue screen effect is as they drive down the street. Tommy starts driving straight at a tractor-trailer parked across the street, and brakes at the last possible moment to avoid collision. He looks over, but Jesus is gone. I don't really get what that whole scene was about.
Lou is on a date with his whore/fake girlfriend. The whore orders one of pretty much everything on the menu, which causes Lou to say he's fine with the bread and a glass of water. The waitress totally pulls an attitude, which cracked me up. Lou tells the whore, Candy, that he doesn't usually do this, and then says that he expected Candy to be "a little bit more, you know, whorish." Candy promises that they'll get there. Lou explains that he doesn't need those services, and asks if she might prorate. Candy says no. She asks if this is about revenge, and Lou says that it's a fake relationship. Candy totally gets it, and asks where the other woman is hiding. Lou points out Sandra, who is standing across the street. Candy leans over and gives Lou a big fat kiss. She sits back down and asks if Sandra is waving him over. Lou glances and sees that Sandra is. Candy says she's going to the restroom so that Lou can go talk to her. She also advices him not to skip out on the check, or she'll "hunt [Lou] down and hack [his] balls off."
Once Candy is gone, Lou walks across the street to where Sandra is lurking. Before he can explain a thing, Sandra grabs him and starts making out with him. She pulls away and tells Lou to call her tomorrow, and then walks off.
Franco arrives home and appears shaky and sweaty. He downs some water. Laura says hello and reports that Keela is still awake and asking for Franco. Laura lightly asks about the NA meeting, since Franco hasn't really talked about it. Franco begs off and tries to walk away. Laura pulls him back and says that not talking got him into this mess in the first place. Franco wonders what he's supposed to talk about, because he's completely obsessed with a "tiny white pill." Franco stops talking and winces, either from nausea, or pain, or dizziness, or some other withdrawal symptom. Laura expresses concern, and Franco tells her it's been happening since he quit the drugs. Franco doesn't understand how "almost losing [his] little girl ain't enough to make this go away." Keela calls out, and Franco takes off, leaving Laura there looking pained.
Franco goes into Keela's room and sits to her bed. She asks him to lie down with her, but Franco says that he can't sleep tonight because he's afraid. His voice breaks as he admits it. Keela says, "Lay down. I'll keep you safe." Franco lies down to her in the bed, and Keela puts her little hand over his neck as Franco cries.
Tommy enters the House of a Thousand Cats and finds Teddy eating steak ice cream. You heard me. Teddy explains that it's called Beefstachio, and that he offered it to Ben & Jerry's but that they weren't interested. Tommy's kids are all asleep. Teddy asks if Tommy saw Miami Mike, and Tommy says that he didn't because he had "more important things to do." Like what? We know Tommy didn't make it home in time to pick up his kids, so what has he been doing since he got the phone call? This episode is confusing. Teddy predicts that, without his stash, Tommy will be in for a long night. Tommy sits down in a chair and stares at his sleeping children.