We open on the Work Bench at night. Homeless JBL exploits the facilities à la Career Opportunities. There's even a shower scene. To which I say, Where's Mrs. Bates when you need her? He wakes up the morning and calls Sam, who's getting dressed as Beelzebabe snores like Cerberus in his bed. She gets up, and they head to join The Stooges for some bowling. Sam tells B-babe she's the first girl to infiltrate the bowling circle. God, they really are losers.
We see the bowling alley exterior, and the sign actually says "Bowling Health Club." I guess barbecue is the equivalent of Vitamin Water in this town. Inside, Sam and B-babe mock JBL and Ben's bowling costumes, which look not unlike the wardrobe of an extra from Swingers. JBL doesn't care, though; he's got a badass skull bowling ball and an sure-fire strike. B-babe cradles and tosses her ball like a five-year-old. Still, she manages some strikes -- until the ball rolls into the gutter. She indiscreetly issues a potent death stare that steers it back into the strike zone. Sam looks on, concerned.
At The Bench the morning, Sam expresses his trepidation about B-babe's demonic attributes. Ben and JBL try to assuage his fears -- which has nothing to do with that time she showed them her boobs, I'm sure. JBL lays it down -- despite all her…ummm…quirks, Cady is actually interested in Sam. "What else do you want?" he asks. Then they run into Andi, and she and Sam flirt as they head to a staff meeting. Ben aptly responds, "Or did you mean who else does he want?"
In the meeting, Tedager briefs the staff that he suspects shoplifting at The Bench. He plans to outfit the store with security cameras to squelch the sticky fingers. Afterward, The Stooges go to check out JBL's new apartment, and he nonchalantly grabs a pack of chips for the road. Ben reminds him that Tedager warned them about this kind of thing less than five seconds ago, but JBL rationalizes that "It's not stealing if it's your own house." Because that worked out so well last time, Gnarly Chaplin.
The Stooges head into a posh apartment that is clearly out of JBL's financial league. JBL spills the beans that he forged their names on the lease, and they're his new roomies. Surprise! Sam is reluctant -- with his troubled history of contracts signed for him by other people -- but JBL convinces him by comparing Sam and himself to Batman and Robin. In this scenario, Ben is Alfred. Ha.
Back at 667, Sam's parents are hesitant about his decision. Sam convinces them it'll be a learning experience and an important first step toward independence. And yet, not two seconds after his parents approve, JBL and Sam totally undermine their confidence by turning on the blender without putting on the lid. Cue milkshake explosion. Does anyone who isn't a six-year-old named Rudy Huxtable even do that anymore?
Sam heads upstairs to pack, and WiseGuy steps out of the walk-in closet and startles him. He asks whether Sam is finally moving out. Sam retorts that WiseGuy is "finally coming out of the closet." WiseGuy throws the snark back at him, rendering it unfunny in about a second and a half. That's just how he rolls. Sam, seeing he's been checked, tells WiseGuy cuts to the chase.
So he transports them to a playground to mock Sam's new "big boy" status. Sam gets testy at this mocking, so WiseGuy give him the details. Herbert Scrim was a Unabomber-style serial killer who lived as a hermit in the woods. Scrim used to hunt and kill anyone who trespassed on his property, which has now been converted to a city park, all the better for hunting hapless nature-lovers. WiseGuy points Sam in Scrim's direction and tells Sam to be careful, but refuses him more help, saying big boys should be able to handle things on their own.
The day, Andi and Josie stop by The Stooges' new apartment to bring housewarming gifts. Once Ben settles the important matter of whether he should decorate with an R2D2 poster or a Princess Leia one (Leia takes it for bone-ability), the conversation moves on, and Sam admits that he hasn't yet told B-babe he moved. Apropos of that, Josie and Andi sashay into the bar talking about Andi's last encounter with B-babe, when B-babe basically threatened to slash Andi's tires. Josie says Andi owes it Sam to tell him his girlfriend's a psychopath. But Andi has tires on the line, and those things are not cheap. She claims she doesn't want to come off as jealous, but Josie's all, "Yeah, but you are."
Back at the new place, The Stooges watching a news report Scrim. JBL finds WiseGuy's housewarming gift -- the vessel. They open it up, and it's The Bullet. No, not the vibrator (as Ben hopes), but the food processor. JBL is way too jazzed about it. Sam opens it up to check it out, and a flying blade zips around the room. They can be culinary ninjas! In four different speeds!
The day at The Bench, B-babe stops by as Sam Windexes some glass doors. She tells him she found out about the move…from his parents. Ouch. She asks if everything's okay, and he says yes. Because he's a coward. Spotting the cameras, she asks if they should give Tedager something to watch. As they make out, a glass door behind them shatters. Sam mumbles something about cleaning up the mess and blows B-babe's dinner invitation off, saying he'll call her.
Later, at the apartment, Sam considers breaking up with B-babe. JBL interrupts this metaphysical dilemma by unveiling the kind of way-too-complicated video gaming system that inhabits every bachelor pad. Inevitably, the game short-circuits before they even start playing. They decide to get help from their neighbors. Is electronics repair the "cup of sugar" of the new millennium?
Turns out, their neighbors are two guys named Steve and Tony -- Michael Ian "I Love The [Insert Decade Here]" Black and Ken "I Banged Joey Potter" Marino, respectively. (Yay for The State!) Before you can say "homo-paranoia," JBL realizes God must have misheard his prayer to live near The Girls Door and has instead given him The Gays Door. They're super-nice and invite The Stooges in, but JBL Freudian slips, "No thanks, we're straight."
Sam recovers that fumble, and The Gays Door head over to The Stooges' place to fix the game system and tsk-tsk at the bare refrigerator. Steve invites The Stooges over for some gourmet mac 'n' cheese the night. JBL agrees to the man date, and bromance blooms. As The Stooges head out to hunt the hunter, JBL says that, even though he's not gay, he may be falling in love with Steve and Tony.
Once in the park, their desire to find Scrim somehow ends with Ben being hoisted into a redwood tree. With his propensity for injury, I'm betting this doesn't end well. And he falls. It's a fortunate fall, though -- he uncovers a jogger's corpse buried in some leaves as he scrambles to get up. Back at The Bench, JBL tends to Ben's wounds, and Sam decides that Scrim they should lure Scrim by dressing as joggers. So simple, yet so stupid.
Back in the woods, about 90 seconds into their run, JBL starts to huff and puff like Big Easy in The Gauntlet III. Fortunately, The Stooges are much more charitable than psychotic CT, so they actually take a break. They start running again, but their riveting conversation (Which female super hero is more doable?) is interrupted by a piercing scream.
They discover a girl with a broken neck, Scrim's latest victim. Bullet in hand, they look around warily. Sam realizes too late that this is a trap, and suddenly JBL is whisked up in a trap and strung up by his ankle. Sam tells Scrim to come out, and so he does. Only he's one of those aqueous, invisible demons that they can't see until he is holding Sam up by the neck. JBL grabs the vessel, but he doesn't know how to work it. The struggle is interrupted by a pack of barking dogs that force Scrim to skedaddle.
Back at The Bench, The Stooges have purloined several cartloads of stuff to ensnare Scrim. Tedager calls Sam to help him install the new security cameras. Because they're so effective. Sam perches on a chair to fix the camera, then suddenly drops from the perch into a kindergarten classroom where WiseGuy awaits. They argue semantics over whether WiseGuy really told Sam about Scrim's invisibility. Sam insists he needs something to work with, so WiseGuy gives him some eyeglasses that will help him "see the true face of evil," then smirks that Sam really does need him after all. Sam defiantly hands them back -- a monumentally stupid gesture, of course. Sam needs him because WiseGuy sets Sam up to fail every time. But, as we know, Sam learns nothing. (On another note, something tells me these glasses will reappear in regard to B-babe.)
The school bell rings, and we're back at The Bench. B-babe creeps up on Andi, who is stocking candy (because it's still Valentine's Day in Reaperville). Andi tries to direct her to Sam, but B-babe says she actually wants to speak with Andi. B-babe asks what's going on with Sam; she says he's been distant, and she thinks it has to do with Andi. Andi tries to assure B-babe there's nothing going on, but it's not an easy sell.
Over at the new apartment, The Stooges head for dinner with The Gays Door. In what I can only imagine is an attempt to fit in, JBL is wearing an argyle sweater. Undercutting this effort, however, is his decision to bring along that classiest of dinner drinks, a cheap six-pack. Yeah, he's definitely not gay. He insists they stop talking about demons so he can enjoy his gourmet mac 'n' cheese. Before Steve and Tony open the door, Sam wonders why they're hearing power tools inside. We also learn that the argyle sweater was actually a purchase JBL made on a shopping excursion with The Gays.
Steve and Tony welcome The Stooges inside. JBL immediately zeroes in on the bar, while Sam and Ben bumble about. Steve begins the bromantic seduction with pancetta-wrapped shrimp, which Sam promptly spills on his shirt. He and Steve head into the kitchen to clean it up, and Steve reveals that he works in security. Consequently, his and Tony's house is decked out with top-of-the-line gadgets, including cameras and motion detectors. This sets off a light bulb over Sam's head re: Scrim.
After dinner, The Stooges return to The Bench. Changing from cardigans to camo coveralls, they gear up to take down Scrim. Shortly after, Tedager walks in to discover all his security cameras have been stolen. Irony at its schlubby best. Andi takes the opportunity to mock Tedager to his face. He is not amused.
Over in the woods, The Stooges unhappily learn that a charity running event is scheduled during their stakeout, which puts scores of joggers in danger. JBL offers to hold up the runners while Sam and Ben take care of Scrim. So they take their motion detectors into the woods, and he concocts some nonsense reason should forego running and actually hug trees. It makes little sense to them, but plot requires they hug, so they hug.
Moments later, a contagion of motion detectors flare up as Sam and Ben unload paint ball guns into the void, trying to pin down Scrim's location. They do okay until they realize that JBL has the vessel. Scrim overtakes Sam, and Ben tries to fend him off as they tussle. JBL finally arrives, tosses Sam the vessel, and it's so long, Scrim. The Stooges fire a three-gun victory salute.
Back at The Bench, the cameras are magically re-installed. Andi gives Sam props for successfully foiling Tedager, then jumps into the dreaded conversation about B-babe. Oh Reaper, Awkward be thy name. Andi cuts to the chase and warns Sam to be careful.
He heads home quickly before meeting up with B-babe, only to find WiseGuy on his couch. WiseGuy asks if there's "trouble in Paradise." Sam caves and admits that he suspects B-babe might be Satan spawn, which WiseGuy denies. Then he conveniently slips Sam the eyeglasses in case he ever needs "to see somebody's true colors." Nope, no agenda here. None at all.
Sam heads into the coffee shop to meet B-babe. He puts on the glasses but doesn't see any Devil's Advocate-style demon snarl on her face, so his fears are assuaged. He starts to apologize, but B-babe isn't having it. She calls him out for being distant and says she's going to see her mom in New Mexico to think about things.
Sam returns to the apartment, where JBL and Ben are playing video games and discussing the delicious crab dip that The Gays Door gave them. (It must be noted that The Stooges have a sweet dartboard with Tedager's picture on it.) Sam wonders where his shirts are, and Ben explains that Steve and Tony took them to be laundered. Sam wonders if it's weird that they've replaced their parents with Jennifer Has Two Daddies, but JBL insists it's just genius strategery.
So, Sam heads out to retrieve his shirts. As all good neighbors do, he walks in completely unannounced. He tries to call out to them, but they can't hear him over the buzzing electrical buffers. He follows the sound and ends up spying on them buffing down horns on their heads in the bathroom. Startled, Sam heads back to tell JBL and Ben that The Gays Door are actually demons. Cue double spit take.