We open as The Stooges creep around a tacky, sloppy apartment prominently featuring a decorative hula girl. Naturally, I assume it's JBL's, but not so, we learn. Sam's current quarry lives there. Before I can say "Fra-jeel-ay," JBL asks if he can have the hula girl, accidentally activating the hula girl and alerting the reapee -- who is in the shower -- to their presence.
The soul (Leon) calls out. When they reveal why they're there, he argues that he isn't hurting people anymore. When Sam points out a wall o' terrorism, filled with clips on the World Trade Organization and G8, Leon claims it's a "thought board," prescribed by his therapist. They tell him to come out, and a shot tears through the bathroom door. Leon (played by the endearingly rotund and seemingly innocuous Patton Oswalt) comes out of the bathroom like John Wayne, with a big ol' shotgun in place of his hand. He prepares to deep-six them, but -- in keeping with Leon's kitsch motif -- Sam tosses the vessel (a snow globe) at him. Leon is sucked inside, leaving the snow globe swirling. JBL says, "Wow, this is getting easier and easier," which leads me to believe the rest of this week's reap won't be. But first, may I just say -- action in the first five minutes? Say it ain't so!
The Stooges enter the DMV to drop off the vessel. They arrive at Gladys's window to find someone else in her place. Sam tries to suss out whether this sub is demonic but ends up just weirding the guy out. The sub calls over another, equally undemonic attendant, who volunteers to take the snow globe, but Sam says he'll come back another time.
At The Bench, Tedager is dressed up as Captain Jack Sparrow and, dare I say it, actually looks kind of hot -- in that dirty, three-day-old-guyliner kind of way. Andi snickers as Tedager pontificates on Halloween, and Ben points out that Halloween is still two days away. Tedager rebuts that Halloween is not a day, but a season. He adds that he has a special treat -- one lucky employee will dress up as a pumpkin. In everyone else's eyes, this costume resembles the kind worn by four-year-olds nationwide, but in Tedager's, it's an honor. As Tedager looks for volunteers, Sam tries to get Andi's attention -- forcefully enough, mind you, that he accidentally volunteers her to wear the costume. Clearly she's not interested, so he falls on the sword and offers to wear it instead.
In the break room, JBL has his own special surprise -- Leon, still stuck inside the snow globe vessel, can talk. JBL wants to put it in Tedager's private bathroom and make him think the toilet can speak. Leon is game, but Sam's not. Leon asks if he can get out for therapy that afternoon. Sam says no on the grounds that Leon assassinated a president -- William McKinley. Leon is flummoxed that Sam's holding something from 100 years ago against him. He says he hasn't hurt anyone for the whole year since he escaped from Hell. Ben points out that Leon shot at them earlier, but Leon argues it was self-defense. Sam snatches the snow globe and puts it in his locker.
Outside, Andi stocks candy. Sam tries to stir up conversation. She ignores him. He apologizes for sabotaging her and Greg, and offers to make it up to her. She says his actions made her question their friendship, and she doesn't know how to be friends with him anymore.
Sam roams The Bench and finds a snarling dog. He follows it outside, where WiseGuy leans against a wall, smoking -- it's all very noir, down to the xylophone strains in the background. WiseGuy calls the dog (Spike) down, and Sam comments on his perfect timing since the rest of the day has sucked. WiseGuy is uncharacteristically taciturn. Sam asks if he's okay, and WiseGuy says the holidays depress him. Sam's surprised that Satan himself doesn't like Halloween, but WiseGuy laments that it's devolved into a commercial event that has drained the fear out of his endeavors. Thus, he gives Hell the day off on Halloween.
He leads Sam into a spooky, turn-of-the-century slaughterhouse. He says a serial killer terrorized the neighborhood in the 1940s and brought his victims there, earning the moniker "The Butcher." Sam suspects, and WiseGuy confirms, that The Butcher is on the loose; he's already killed one person and will kill again. Back in the '40s, the police caught The Butcher but never found his victims, and there was much speculation about what he did with the bodies. WiseGuy looks toward a pile of sawdust that transforms into writhing, screaming human figures. One grabs Sam's calf. He recoils and falls into a pile of paper towels -- he's back at The Bench. Spike barks, standing atop the vessel.
Sam heads toward the break room and spots Andi chatting and laughing with another employee. Clearly she's torn up about their rift. JBL approaches and says Andi will forgive Sam eventually, but Sam knows that Andi has lost her trust in him. JBL pulls the snow globe from his apron and gives it to Sam, saying he took Leon to trivia night last night. Sam's obviously displeased because of Leon's homicidal tendencies, but Leon pipes up that he made a mistake and blames his father complex for his assassination. "See, the therapy's working wonders," says JBL. Leon offers to help Sam with his issues, such as the fact that Sam's parents sold his soul to the Devil. JBL says Leon deserves forgiveness for his mistake, much like Sam for his mistakes with Andi. Tedager interrupts, exposing some poorly manscaped chest action in a gladiator outfit, and tells Sam the pumpkin costume is in his office.
The day, Sam, in his pumpkin-torsoed finest, stands outside shouting, "Scare up some savings at The Bench." JBL says the costume confirms Leon's theory that Sam has self-esteem issues. He says Sam needs to "own the pumpkin." Sam throws it right back at him, saying, "You own the pumpkin." JBL says he would kill to wear the costume, pointing to his head and declaring, "Embarrassment doesn't compute up here." (As we have long suspected, friend.) JBL swings his apron around his neck like a cape, drops trou, and proclaims himself Underwear Man. What follows is a typically JBL-ian pep talk involving underwear-induced awkwardness with an unwitting Bench patron and the phrase "Show 'em you're the cat's nuts." On the bright side, Sam feels better. And that is why he keeps JBL around. Someone's gotta be the a-hole, right?
Now it's time to open this week's vessel. Drum roll…it's a meat thermometer. Sam says it's fitting, since the soul was called The Butcher. Sam acknowledges that WiseGuy, for a change, actually gave him a substantial dossier on the reap. They look him up, tussling with a small child along the way. Minutes later, Ben reports back to Sam and JBL. The soul's former name was Barney Kirkwood, a.k.a. The Butcher of Ballard. Beside what we already know, Ben says many suspected Kirkwood of chopping up his victims and feeding them to his dog. The Stooges decide to head to Ballard to check it out.
When they arrive in Ballard, Sam doesn't recognize anything. Soon enough, though, they notice a "Missing" poster, on which they quickly identify the assumed victim of The Butcher. Sam gets his bearings and realizes they are in the right place. The hunt is on.
Later that night, we see a full moon and hear Track #1 on the Dollar Store's Halloween Sounds CD. I hope "Monster Mash" is ! But just when I underestimate the show (or, as it were, roughly six weeks later), it's revealed that Sam and Ben are watching a cheesy horror flick, not living one -- subversive! In fact, there is no full moon tonight, and they're waiting for JBL. He is, natch, at The Bench gabbing with Leon and chowing down junk food. Andi happens upon him and rolls her eyes at his general air of jackass. After she exits, Leon regales JBL with the toilet prank they pulled on Tedager.
JBL eventually tears himself away from his new BFF to join The Stooges in creeping around the slaughterhouse. They hear growling and see the lamest red-eyed CGI hellhound ever. They run (like little girls) and slide a door closed behind them, planning to wait until the werewolf goes away. Because it's a big, strong demon, though, it rips through the door with its claws and snarls through a small, barred window in the door. Sam pulls out the vessel to stab the hellhound, but only manages to drop it and get injured. The demon dog tears through the door but is apparently scared away by Spike, who prances through the gaping hole left by Sam's quarry. JBL picks him up and gives him a big hug.
At the bar, JBL proposes Leon help with this reap, and pulls the snow globe out of his pocket. Leon says he knew The Butcher in Hell. Sam's dubious, but Leon psychobabbles to Sam long enough for even Ben to jump on board. Ben has decided Leon might actually be rehabilitated. He notes that even God forgives sins. Sam will not abide, and vows to get Leon back to Hell tonight. He rushes to the DMV and bangs on the door, then screams at a random cleaning lady to take the vessel. She wisely chooses to ignore the random loony behind Door #1. Leon suggests Sam take some anti-anxiety medicine.
At 667, Sam showers. He reaches for his towel but can't find it. Suddenly it's tossed at him -- by WiseGuy, natch. Sam wants WiseGuy out of there, but WiseGuy insists, "I'm like a doctor. It all looks like raw meat to me." Sam can't even formulate a response to that, so we move on. WiseGuy plays darts as Sam de-nudes. He pleads with WiseGuy to take the vessel, but WiseGuy says Sam will have to hold on to it for one more day, until Hell gets back to work. He asks what the rush is, and Sam recounts the strife he believes Leon caused. Never the sensitive one, WiseGuy then asks about Andi, a situation Sam admits is equally dismal.
WiseGuy gets a fatherly glint in his eye and says he wants to give Sam one piece of advice. "Betrayal," he says, "is the defining trait of humanity." He adds that everyone, in the end, will let Sam down. He thinks Sam is upset because he's finally recognizing this. WiseGuy ratchets it up one more notch, telling Sam, "I may be the most trustworthy person you know…and that's just sad." As they talk, the clock strikes midnight, and WiseGuy wishes Sam a happy Halloween.
The morning, Sam is again wearing the pumpkin get-up and handing out flyers in the parking lot. Andi stomps up in some serious mini-skirt/hooker-boot action. It's not a social call, though, as she's there to deliver a message from Tedager. Sam inquires about her Halloween plans, but she insists they should talk only about work-related stuff. He protests a little but fails to change her mind.
Out of the pumpkin, Sam heads into the break room. He notices the snow globe is empty and approaches JBL in the stock room. JBL says he's sorry just as Leon pops up behind Sam and does the old "stick 'em up" routine. He's just joking, though, and tells Sam he's actually there to help.
Sam grabs Leon and drags him aside, then chastises JBL for releasing Leon. JBL insists Leon can help, and Leon tosses in some therapy jargon to prove himself. He surmises that The Butcher sleeps during the day, so they can capitalize on the element of surprise by reaping during daylight. He tags on that, if he's right, they'll "work out what [his] reward is" later. Sam's unenthusiastic, but he's also desperate enough to try. He warns Leon that he's bringing the vessel in case Leon gets out of line.
The revised Stooges drive to Ballard. Leon tries to mediate the conflict between Sam and JBL, which only sparks Sam's frustration further. Leon directs them to a Chinese restaurant where he claims to have "people." He won't take Sam or JBL in, so as not to compromise his "street cred." An indeterminate amount of time later, Leon still hasn't returned. Sam wants to go find him, but JBL protests. Sam says he can't trust Leon, and JBL asks why not. Sam calls JBL out that he only let Leon out because he was funny, and complains that JBL never thinks things through.
They're still fighting when Leon returns with a container of Chinese take-out. He says he's got a hot tip to go to the Pleasure Pit -- a strip club, of course. At the Pit, JBL goes through a list his grievances with Sam -- everything from how Sam breathes when he sleeps to his decision to wear mandals. Leon and a stripper jump in the backseat, and Leon says there will be one more stop (not counting dropping off Cinnamon, the stripper). The final stop? A classy joint called Tickle Massage. Dark is falling. So much for the element of surprise. Leon returns to say that it's on, and they drive off.
As anyone with half a brain could have guessed, all this rigmarole has led them precisely back to where they started -- the Ballard slaughterhouse. Leon shows them a secret subterranean area. As Sam and JBL peer in, a gun cocks behind them. Leon has redeployed his gun-arm, and he's pointing it at Sam. Sam tries to bargain, but Leon will not be placated. Leon only wants Sam to step into the hole, but JBL mans up so his friend won't die alone. That idea appeals to Leon more than going back to Hell, so he agrees. He closes the top on them, smugging, "Boy, my therapist is going to be really disappointed in me." Commercials.
Armed with a flashlight, JBL and Sam navigate the underground. Then the growling starts. JBL gives Sam a terror-induced man hug, and there is ass-clutching, folks. The hellhound steps out from behind a pillar. Having lost the meat thermometer vessel, Sam desperately chucks the snow globe at the hound. It doesn't work exactly, but it does create a blast that propels him and JBL out of the hole.
Sam lands in a pile of trash, and JBL falls near the meat thermometer vessel. He tosses it over to Sam, but Sam is intercepted by the werewolf. The hellhound drags Sam by his clothes and readies to maul him imminently. But then Spike appears and distracts them all. Convenient. Sam grabs the vessel and jams it into the hound's throat. He gets sucked up real good, and the meat thermometer falls down by Sam. JBL joins him there, and they pant and talk in a decidedly post-coital manner. They finally stand up and limp off. Sam asks about Leon, and JBL says he knows exactly where to go.
Cut to Leon in therapy. His bored therapist takes a call so she can stop listening to this schlub. Someone is breaking into her car, so she goes to deal with it. It was all a diversion, of course, and The Stooges arrive to retrieve Leon. Leon makes nervous banter until he is forced to pull out the big gun -- literally the one in his arm. Sam reveals his new Secret Talent, courtesy of Leon -- psychobabble! He talks Leon down from the ledge by echoing back all the same stuff Leon earlier claimed -- that Leon has worked out his issues, reformed, et cetera. Leon begrudgingly admits Sam's right and puts down the gun, then apologizes to JBL.
At the DMV, Leon, who is back in the vessel, commits to five therapy sessions per week in Hell. The Stooges arrive at the front of the line, and Gladys looks B-E-A-T. JBL appreciates a fellow burnout when he sees one and suggests they party together. She gets straight to business, and Leon is gone before Sam can ask her to take good care of him.
Sam returns to The Bench and to Andi. He gets right to the point, admitting that he made a mistake and apologizing for the millionth time. He says they have a real friendship and that one mistake shouldn't be enough to destroy it. He says he'll fight for it. Andi has softened up a bit, and acknowledges that he just took an uncharacteristic stand. She admits she was miserable fighting with him, so they plan to get a beer after work. Sam walks away and unabashedly lunges into a "Yesssss!" Andi smiles.
Outside, a much happier WiseGuy slams pumpkins with a golf club. On the other hand, there's no rest for Sam, who must start on Thanksgiving stuff for Tedager. WiseGuy gives Sam a pat on the back for being the only employee to work these last few days. He invites him out on the town in a limo, but Sam mentions his plans with Andi. The night, asks WiseGuy? Sam has plans with JBL. Sam tells WiseGuy he's wrong about humanity and betrayal, sarcastically suggesting WiseGuy get professional help. WiseGuy counters that he invented therapy -- so the wicked could justify their actions -- but Sam shrugs it off and tells WiseGuy he's getting savvier to his lies. He leaves WiseGuy in the parking lot, smashing pumpkins.
week: The entire episode appears to be in Super 8, à la a pulp flick. There are fast cars, Sam makes out with a blonde chick, JBL humps a jukebox, and WG concludes, "It all comes down to endorphins and genitalia."