Wes meets a girl named Wren (what?) and brings her home, where he proceeds to feed her lines in front of all his roommates. Later, Johanna starts making out with Wes in a club, and all of the roommates get up in their business and have to find out about it. Mostly, everyone is shocked that Johanna deigned to let Wes touch her at all. Danny and Nehemiah counsel Wes to have sex with Johanna "for America," even though Wes says that he likes Wren better. Wes decides to teach Rachel how to be a real woman instead of a slut. Shut up, Wes. Rachel makes out with a bouncer at the Dizzy Rooster, and Nehemiah gets pissed because he's worried that Rachel will screw up his underage-getting-into-bars business. Rachel flips out on Nehemiah in a scary way. Danny takes the initiative a few days later to talk to Rachel about her experiences in Iraq and how they might still be affecting her.
No most awesome thing this week, because most of what I've seen on television this week has not been very awesome. My thoughts are with all those affected by Hurricane Katrina and its aftermath.
Dizzy Rooster. Wes talks to a chick named Wren, with very black hair. Wes tells her she's really cool, and she doesn't seem all that interested in him. Wes interviews that he's "like a hunter," and goes after the best-looking girl in the bar. He feels that, with Wren, he's found her. If that's the best-looking girl in the Dizzy Rooster, they're in pretty sad shape. It's like when you watch the Miss American pageant and you're like, "That's the best they could get from Iowa? Yikes. Remind me never to go to Iowa." No offense to Iowa; I'm speaking hypothetically. As they leave, Wes tells Wren that the police sirens nearby remind him of home, because he's been arrested before. Ooh, Wes is a bad-ass. I'm sure he's been arrested many times for...loitering. And public drunkenness. And bad pick-up lines. Wes tells Wren that he's not a nice guy, and interviews that he thinks Wren can bring out the best in him. They pause outside the house, and Wes says he's going in and he'd love her to come inside as well. She does.
Wes sits in the kitchen with all his roommates around, and tells Wren that she's "the kind of girl [he] could make changes in [his] life for." I can't believe he's talking like that in front of his roommates. He deserves all the taunting he gets. Johanna makes fun of Wes because she thinks Wren is eighteen and probably has homeroom early in the morning. I can't believe Johanna actually just made a funny joke. Johanna interviews that even though Wren is young and skinny, Johanna's not jealous because she doesn't want Wes. Wes thinks Johanna is jealous, but he doesn't care. Wes keeps telling Wren that he thinks it's fate that they met so early. Wes interviews that he used to try to conquer girls, but he thinks he needs to treat Wren differently. Is he part Viking? How do you conquer a girl? That's more than a little creepy. I think Wes has mommy issues. Wes hugs Wren goodbye without even getting a kiss. Pussy.
Some other night, Wes talks to Rachel as she decides what to wear out to a bar. Rachel wants to wear a skirt, but Wes tells her that if she's going to be up on a bar, she can't wear a skirt. Do people really preplan whether they're going to jump up on a bar? I've never done it myself, but I always thought it was kind of a spontaneous thing, like, "Woo! I love this song so me and my crazy girlfriends are going to dance on the bar like that movie with Piper Perabo, who then dropped off the face of the earth, but I still like to watch the movie sometimes when it's on TBS, but don't tell anyone. What? Woo!" Wes says that he thinks of Rachel as a little sister, and he doesn't want people to think she's a slut. Because there are no shades of gray there -- she's either your little sister, or a slut, and she can't possibly be both. Shut up, Wes. Rachel protests that she'll wear "full-butt underwear." Shut up, Rachel. Wes interviews that Rachel is annoying, but that he's going to help her become a "real woman," and her boyfriend will be proud. God, Wes is so FUCKING disgusting with his Madonna/whore complex and his '50s views on female sexuality and his doughy, undeveloped moonface and his ugly pee-colored hair. SHUT UP, WES! Wes asks Lacey whether standing up on a bar makes a woman a slut. Lacey says that about five out of seven people would think a woman on a bar is a slut. I love how Lacey tries to make it scientific so that it doesn't seem personal, yet it's also a little like a chewing-gum commercial with the dentists and the surveys. Rachel protests that she's not a slut, because she hasn't had sex in the house. Lacey differentiates between acting slutty and being slutty, and Rachel agrees that she acts slutty. Unfortunately, none of them mentions that there's nothing innately wrong with either acting slutty or being slutty, and furthermore, no one mentions that WES said that he likes to CONQUER WOMEN, like, if that's not slutty, I don't know what is. Rachel interviews that she's never had the chance to be a partier, and that she wants to get it out of her system before she settles down with her boyfriend permanently. Wes declares that if Rachel were not with Eric, she'd be a slut. I'm out of shut up for Wes.
No, I found another one. Shut up, Wes.
At the Dizzy Rooster, Melinda and Rachel dance on the bar. Why isn't anyone having the slut conversation with Melinda? Rachel ends up making out with Matt, a bouncer. A guy behind them totally makes fun of them for making out, opening his mouth and flopping his tongue around. Why can't that guy live in the house instead of Wes? Rachel interviews that Matt is a good kisser. Other things I know about Matt now: his approximate tongue size, color, and texture, thanks to the make-out footage.
Later, at home, Danny accidentally sets a dishtowel on fire and yells that it's on "fi-yah!" Hee. Melinda and Rachel argue with Nehemiah over whether Matt is cute enough to make out with. Nehemiah is mad because he thinks Rachel's interactions with Matt, the bouncer, might mess up his situation. He doesn't give details, but it's fairly clear that Matt lets Nehemiah in, and allows him to drink even though he's underage. Nehemiah's worried that his arrangement might end due to Rachel's actions. Rachel starts yelling that Nehemiah needs to be quiet, and Nehemiah is kind of laughing at her because she's being ridiculous. Rachel just starts screaming -- totally serious all of a sudden, even though they were joking earlier -- about how she doesn't want to live with Nehemiah anymore, and she hates him. Danny, standing to her, is just shocked that Rachel went from zero to sixty so quickly. Nehemiah just ignores Rachel with a smirk on his face, instead of engaging with her and escalating the situation. And it seems that, when he got in that fight with Johanna, Nehemiah stated that he prefers to disengage rather than fight. Rachel stomps out of the room in a fury, and everyone looks around like, "Wuh the fuh?"
But Rachel's not done. She runs back into the room, cursing that she's not going to leave the room like a fucking coward, and refers to Nehemiah as "a weak little film student." Nehemiah interviews that he finds Rachel's ridiculous outburst very funny. Rachel starts screaming more nonsense at Nehemiah, and ends up calling him a slut. This somehow finally gets Nehemiah's goat, and he tells Rachel that she's the slut, and stands up. Rachel begs him to hit her, and everyone gets in between them. Rachel starts to walk away, and Wes and Danny try to calm her down, and Rachel starts screaming that she hopes Nehemiah gets shot in the street one day, and she plans to tell her friends about him, and he'll get shot in the street. Danny finally catches up with Rachel and drags her off. He interviews that he's holding Rachel back because she's completely lost it and is acting like a little girl. Rachel collapses into Danny's arms, sobbing. He hugs her. Nehemiah is still smirky. Danny picks Rachel up and carries her out of the room.
Back in the kitchen, Nehemiah says it's "soap-opera shit." Nehemiah interviews that Rachel makes herself a target. He tells Danny and Wes that Rachel is emotionally fucked up from her childhood, and that she could never cut it in his family, because her outburst tonight was like a daily occurrence for him growing up. I think that explains the smirky behavior. Nehemiah obviously learned at a young age to ignore people who are acting in a ridiculous manner, yelling their fool heads off. And then he probably learned that the one thing you can do without getting into it is to laugh at them. I'm not saying it's a mature response, but I can understand where he's coming from.
Johanna and Melinda try to calm Rachel down in her bedroom. Rachel begs them to let her up so that she can hit Nehemiah, and then starts crying that she wants to go home. Melinda covers Rachel's mouth with her hand, so it's hard to hear what Rachel actually says , but Johanna and Melinda counsel her that she doesn't want to wish death on anyone, so I'm guessing it was some variation on the whole "shot in the street" thing. Rachel looks thrilled with all the attention she's getting, and there are no actual tears coming out of her eyes. I'm just saying.
The day, Wes, Danny, and Nehemiah go to a restaurant. Nehemiah says that Wes is in lust with Wren. Nehemiah interviews that Wes falls for any girl that whispers sweet nothings to him. I get the vibe that Nehemiah doesn't like Wes all that much. Wes interviews that when he looks in Wren's eyes, he only wants to be with her, and he doesn't feel that way about the other girls he meets. Nehemiah says that Wes and Danny are making him sick with their lovey-dovey shit.
Wes calls Wren, and she says she doesn't know where she's going out tonight. Wes tries to pin her down, but she seriously is just not that into him. Wes says he's going out with the guys because he thought she had to work, and Wren says they'll meet up somewhere, and hangs up on him.
Wes goes to tell Johanna about the call. He makes it out like Wren was mad at him for going out with the guys, which was not at all what I got. It seemed like Wren didn't really want to talk to him, nor go out with him. Johanna interviews that she doesn't want to be mad at Wes anymore, because she likes hanging out with him. Rachel interviews that Wes and Johanna have a lot of sexual tension, and she thinks Wes likes Johanna. Hasn't Wes basically said that in every episode?
Wes and Johanna go out to the Dizzy Rooster. What happened to the guys' night out? Wes and Johanna dance together, and Johanna turns and starts making out with him. She tells him that they live together, so they might as well make out, too. Wes voice-overs that he doesn't know why Johanna is kissing him, but he figures he might not get this chance again, so he's going for it. Wes and Johanna go to another bar, where they grind and make out some more.
Back home, Wes and Johanna tell Lacey that they split up from Danny and Nehemiah and went out on their own. Johanna just busts out with the fact that she made out with Wes. Lacey interviews that she totally thinks Johanna is too good for Wes. Lacey reminds Wes of their conversation in which he said that, when Johanna finally kissed him, he would just kiss Johanna for a second and then tell her, "This is what you could have had," and walk away. Lacey mocks Wes over and over again. Johanna and Lacey laugh, and Wes is totally busted. Heh.
Danny and Nehemiah get home, and are immediately informed that Wes made out with Johanna. Nehemiah is disgusted. With Johanna. Danny finally figures out what's going on, like, twenty minutes later, and laughs. Nehemiah says that he's lost respect for both of them. Then, he changes his mind and says he's just lost respect for Johanna.
Nehemiah and Danny grill Wes about the situation in another room. Nehemiah says one of the most honest things he's said in the entire episode: "I wanted to make out with her!" Nehemiah interviews that Wes had better "get them drawers" or he'll be kicking himself later. Nehemiah gets right in Wes's grill and tells him, "If you don't fuck her, you're a bitch." Wes says that he likes Wren. Danny and Nehemiah get mad and start fake-hitting Wes. Nehemiah once again says that if Wes doesn't get "some of that Peruvian pussy," he's a bitch. Remember when I kind of liked Nehemiah, like, ten minutes ago? I'm over it. He's just as bad as Wes. Danny thinks that Wes shouldn't hook up with Johanna tonight, and Nehemiah disagrees. Wes doesn't want to admit it, but finally says that the whole time he was kissing Johanna, he was thinking about Wren.
Nehemiah begs Wes to fuck Johanna for him. Then, he changes his mind and says that Wes should do it for all of them. Danny adds, "For America!" Which was kind of funny in the moment. Wes protests that he's abstaining right now. Danny and Nehemiah stand Wes up and walk him into the bathroom and urge him to fuck Johanna for America. As Wes goes into the bathroom, Danny and Nehemiah salute him, and some patriotic music tootles in the background. Now, there's something a little unsettling about the whole "get the Peruvian pussy for America" thing, but I also sometimes enjoy watching drunk people make assholes out of themselves, so I'm torn.
Wes tells Johanna that he likes to make out with her and Wren. At the same time? In his dreams. Johanna says that she likes to make out with Wes, or anyone else that comes along. Wes acts like he's cool with that. Johanna interviews that he and Wes have "a mutual understanding" that they can both make out with whomever they want, and that they're cool.
Rachel calls her dad and talks about how Nehemiah called her a slut, leaving out the rest of what happened. Her dad advises her just to ignore Nehemiah because he's not worth the annoyance and the attention.
The day, Rachel talks to Wes about her conversation with her dad. Wes says that Rachel was beyond annoyed that night; she was irate. Rachel says she was out of control, and doesn't want to talk about it. She interviews that she doesn't know why she got so upset with Nehemiah. Rachel tells her roommates that she didn't used to have anger issues, and that she's made an appointment at the VA to get some counseling about PTSD. Rachel interviews that PTSD can lead to anger and crying outbursts, and that she wants to investigate that possibility. I bet some counseling would do her good, regardless of whether or not she has PTSD.
Danny tells Johanna that he wants to ask Rachel to go for a walk and talk about her time in Iraq. Danny and Rachel walk through a park somewhere. Danny says that he knows Rachel had some intense experiences in Iraq, and that she doesn't feel like the other roommates get her. Rachel interviews that Danny is putting forth the effort to understand, and that she appreciates it. Rachel says that the worst part about being in Iraq was being scared all the time, and never being able to let your guard down and feel safe. Rachel interviews that going through that much stress and fear was tough, and that she might be letting it out when she gets upset now. Danny says that he really respects Rachel, and she tears up a little, so Danny hugs her. Rachel interviews that she thinks she'll end up being friends with Danny.
As she and Danny walk home, Rachel says that she would talk about this to anyone in the house but Nehemiah. Danny thinks that's exactly whom she needs to talk to. Rachel doesn't want to sound like a bitch, but she doesn't think Nehemiah is worth the time and effort. Danny insists that she might be surprised, but Rachel says that not everyone is as understanding as Danny is. Rachel interviews that, for the first time since she moved in, she feels okay, and that she's not crazy, but that she has some stuff to deal with. Rachel sits down and reads a book, while nearby, Nehemiah plays this basketball game they have set up. The two of them look at each other, but don't speak at all.