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In the Drama of the Week, a woman is eight months pregnant and her baby is breech. And did I mention that she's in a coma? Awesome! Of course, I already saw the movie on Lifetime, but this has Addison! Addison insists on surgery, but the woman's not-quite husband demands that the baby be delivered naturally. When Comama's parents disagree it's a courthouse procedural wrapped inside a medical drama -- more bang for the buck!
Speaking of bangs, Addison has been taking care of SWAT while he recuperates from his gunshot wound. He has an awesome scar and even more awesome facial scruff. How could Lorelai ever have divorced that?
Speaking of bangs, again, Violet's patient killed Sam's patient. While you might think it was the police's job to sort out whether it was a mercy killing or a murder, Violet decides to play Lenny Briscoe. With the help of SWAT (yes, Addison's SWAT, he's bored, okay?) Violet makes a fateful realization and outs her own patient. Luckily he waived all claims of patient-doctor privilege. They made sure to mention that for once. Yay writers!
Speaking of writers, they had a field day today when randomly deciding which of our merry cast of characters' back stories includes donations to Planned Parenthood and which include drafting hate mail to Gloria Steinem. Turns out even our soon-to-be midwife is anti-choice. Baby killing hijinks ensue! And who is spearheading that baby killing? Meg! Pete's erstwhile ersatz girlfriend has encamped at Oceanside Wellness much to his privacy's and the anti-choice movement's chagrin.
Did someone mention chagrin? Charlotte is totally regretting hiding her career aspirations from Cooper. He is completely pissed and isn't looking conciliatory at all, despite Charlotte's pleading and apologizing. Maybe she should try frosting herself again!
See our reasons why any patient should avoid Oceanside Wellness Center. Come back on Friday for our full weecap.
Want more? The full recap starts right below!Violet is suffering from a postmodern Hopper-esque frumpiness -- eating Chinese alone on the couch and talking to her television. When the phone rings she thinks it is Cooper, but it's Doug. Doug? When Violet rushes to Doug's house she is greeted at the door and quickly follows him upstairs. She doesn't notice that he is covered in blood and carrying a gun, so we can cross "attention to detail" off of Violet's list of attributes. When the gun is waved in her face and Doug's wife appears to be headless, Violet finally realizes that something is horribly wrong in the House of Doug. Sam and Cooper play racquetball and wish their ex-wives/ex-girlfriends were dead. Seriously! What a perfect segue! Artfully done, writers! Mid-game Sam gets a call and runs off. Meg and Pete discuss how bored she is. She is bored enough to jog, which I think we can all agree is really bored. She's been jogging so much her thighs ache! Oh, I smell a dirty insinuation in the works. Pete hugs her and tells her he knows it is frustrating being in a new place. Then he offers to hurt her thighs in non-running ways. I knew it! I love this show. Addison gives SWAT a sponge bath. He complains about it. As if!
Doug is still covered in blood. Sam can't figure out why Doug shot his wife. Doug claims a shot in the head is way faster than hemlock tea for those inclined to assisted suicide. Sam scratches his head and suggests that palliative care may have been a slightly better option than shooting his wife in the head. But Sam, it's no fun to watch Reiki massage, pain management therapies, and acupuncture! A bullet to the head is quality television! The cops are already at the house. They ask Sam and Violet for their thoughts on the situation. As Doug's therapist, Violet refuses to say anything. Sam as Doug's now-deceased wife's doctor feels more at liberty to discuss the fact that Karen and Doug had a troubled marriage and Doug was planning on leaving her before she was diagnosed. Violet cuts off Sam. Their conversations were privileged. The cops take Doug away. Sam is not at all happy about any of this. Violet is very calm and collected, though.
Cooper is patiently waiting for the elevator when Charlotte enters the lobby. Man does he wish she was dead, or what? Cooper claims the elevator is his territory and she has to use the stairs. Charlotte tells him he has one more day to grovel in his immaturity, and then he has to grow up and discuss the situation. He tells her to go to hell and he enunciates it really, really clearly so she doesn't miss a syllable.
Doug should really steer clear of neon orange. I mean I know crimes must be punished, but making him wear that jump suit is cruel. He looks like a neon orange sausage and lest you think "yummy!" I assure you it is not. Doug is complaining to Violet, not about his attire, but that "they" are claiming he murdered his wife. He is oddly surprised by this assessment. He was just ending her pain! Doug claims that Sam doesn't know what he is talking about, because only saw the deceased two weeks ago for half an hour. Doug had to watch her in pain everyday and he did what she wanted. He begs Violet to help. He waives all confidentiality rights--he just wants help proving his case!
Pete comes home and seems surprised to find Meg is gone. Oh please, she had one foot out the door already and getting yelled at by everyone certainly wouldn't make anyone want to stay. Plus, Pete was a dick.
Violet, Addison, and Naomi hit an outdoor café for a little girl talk. Violet asks if it is true that Pete found out Meg was doing abortions and asked her to leave, because if so that's crazy! Violet's crazy pantomime stops quickly when Naomi looks horrified. After Naomi gives her spiel about being a fertility doctor and creating life, Violet and Addison both admit that they had abortions and wish that they had somewhere nice and safe to go. Naomi fertilizes eggs all day and believes life begins at conception and that is it. Addison begs them to change the subject. Me too!
Charlotte is camped out in front of Cooper's door like his apartment is the box office two days before Lynard Skynard tickets go on sale. She invites him out for a drink and he tells her to go home. When she doesn't move, he bodily lifts her up and out of his way. She apologizes tearfully (well, almost) and swears she will " do the time." He goes inside and Charlotte leans against the door in defeat. Plus, no Skynard tickets.
The morning, Meg comes back to Pete's place. She needed time to think. The man she knew used to share everything with her. She wants to know what happened to him. He doesn't answer. Instead he changes the subject and tells her to come back. They hug.
Sam, Violet, and Addison try to parse out what they should do about Doug. The District Attorney is subpoenaing Karen's medical records. Violet was up all night trying to figure out what to do about it. She wishes she had someone to talk to about all of this. Addison's ears perk up and I think she's somehow going to suggest Mr. Helpful from the elevator, but instead she suggests that Violet should talk to SWAT. Erm...why? It must be so SWAT has his contractually-required five and a half minutes of screen time. Why else would a therapist go talk to a cop instead of, say, a lawyer? Or another therapist? Whatever. Violet sits gingerly on the edge of SWAT's bed and asks how she can know whether it was murder or assisted suicide? Violet spells out the facts for SWAT: Doug was totally submissive to his wife and she can't imagine any scenario where he would have the temerity to shoot his wife without her go-ahead. SWAT gives her the cold hard fact that not one single woman in his entire time on the force has ever asked to be killed with a gun or committed suicide with one. The ladies no likey the guns. Violet doesn't likey that fact.
Over at the hospital some unfrocked judge is hearing the legal arguments not by the lawyers but by the notHusband and the parents of Comama. I'm so glad Shonda can show us these utopian worlds where the needed changes to our legal system can be made. In addition to the family's arguments, the judge asks for Addison's opinion, which is imminent danger fishcakes. The hospital via Charlotte agrees. The judge could rule, but he would rather have the husband withdraw his petition. Like he knows how to do that without his lawyer. The Comama's mama pleads with notHusband to help them save the baby.
Violet makes a run for the elevator only to be greeted once again by Mr. Helpful. He notices that she looks like she is in a hurry. The two spend the long elevator ride trying to out-therapy each other. They throw out some Jung and Freud references for good measure. Then Mr. Helpful quotes Mark Twain and they cheer each other up. Violet asks if he got the job and she looks pleased when she hears that he did.
Meg is still working at the clinic. And she is still working with Dell. Before they get going with their day, Meg wants to talk about the fact that he publicly scared off a patient yesterday. When Dell gets snippy about creating life and making babies, Meg gives him an earful about medical professionalism. They don't get to know why their patients make the choices they do, they just do what the patient wants once they make that choice. It is the hardest choice anyone has to make and Dell can just go suck it.
Addison preps for surgery. When she sees the notHusband skulking about she tells him that he is not allowed to be there. The notHusband confesses that he caused the accident that put Comama in a coma. He made her laugh, she looked away from the road, and whammo! Comama. Addison forgives him for his sins. She tells him that he did not cause the accident and he can't make miracles. But she can. Because she is Addison. She is going to go into that O.R. and make a miracle. O.R. U., Addison?
Violet goes to visit Doug in prison. He asks if she spoke to the DA, but she hasn't yet. She wanted to talk to him more. She questions him about the gun method of assisted suicide, but he claims Karen was worried anything else wouldn't work. He mentions how much pain she was in again, but Violet cuts him off. She wants to talk about his pain. He looks hopeful.
Dell asks Naomi if she is anti-abortion and she admits that she is. Unapologetically, too. He asks if she cares why a woman would choose to have one, for example if she was raped. Naomi deflects and says that it is only important if it matters to him or his beliefs or some such transcendental malarkey. Religious views are one thing, but is something else bothering Dell? For example, his recently discovered child? Under Naomi's intense questioning, Dell cracks and admits that he tried to convince his Baby Mama to have an abortion, but her crack-addled ass refused. And now he has a beautiful daughter! Naomi adjudges him pro-choice, but guilty. He is just punishing himself for the choice he almost made.