All right, everyone, here's the interview that you've all been waiting for, the one you've dreamed about for as long as you can remember. That's right: it's amorgan's madcap conversation with Ryan Murphy, executive producer of Popular. Unfortunately, immediately after conducting this interview, I was called away on Top Secret Business for a couple of weeks, and was unable to transcribe my notes until quite a bit later. While it probably wouldn't stand up in a court of law, I'm sure that I've at least hit all the high points. That said, here we go. ["Warning: the interview contains spoilers. If you don’t want to know what happens in upcoming episodes, you might want to skip it until later in the season." -- Sars] Amorgan: So how on earth did you get Delta Burke? She was incredible! Ryan Murphy: We have the same agent. We met one day at the agency, and liked each other immediately. I told her that I'd love to have her on the show, especially now that she's so thin and glamorous, and she thought it was a great idea. We gave her a choice of four or five roles, and she chose Cherry Cherry immediately. It was a fabulous excuse to put her in that $50,000 mink coat that she wore in the stands in the homecoming episode. Amorgan: How many writers do you have on your show? RM: Well, I wrote six of the first ten shows, but we have a staff of five writers. Amorgan: So, with Roberta Glass [Bio, for those who can't remember her recap name], did you have specific person in mind when you created that character? RM: Not any one person, specifically. I wanted her to be the meanest teacher alive, and totally androgynous. When [the actress] auditioned for the part, she started ad-libbing what ended up being her first scene in the pilot, and we just fell in love with her. We are really lucky to have her. She's very accomplished, with tons of acting credentials under her belt. [Actually, he told me all kinds of things that she's done, but I forgot to write them down, and now I can't remember. I'm sure they were terribly impressive.] We're going to be expanding her role in the show even more than we have, by having her play all of the Glass triplets. Amorgan: (nearly choking) Triplets?! RM: (sounding very pleased with himself) Yep. Triplets. The final Glass sibling is going to be a man, no less, named Rock. Rock Glass. Amorgan: (incoherent shrieks, alternately of delight and dismay) RM: It's going to be very exciting. The Christmas episode is going to be lots of fun, too. It's going to air twice, once on the ninth and again on the twentieth, it's called "Fall On Your Knees." It's a re-telling of A Christmas Carol, and it features Nicole Julian as Scrooge. We built this amazing Christmas Land, which is an outdoor shopping mecca with palm trees and snow.
Amorgan: That sounds like so much fun! So, do you wander out there on your lunch break sometimes and just congratulate yourself for having such a cool job? RM: Um, not really. (Silence. Amorgan wonders if she has, perhaps, made a conversational faux pas.) Amorgan: So. So! [I have no idea what I said here, but I think it had something to do with teen appeal vs. adult appeal, and what kind of feedback they've gotten from parents, fans, etc. Whatever it was, his answer was pretty interesting. Your guess is as good as mine, really.] RM: Screw the teen idea. This show is about ambition. We get away with almost everything that we try. Sometimes we get notes about language. For instance, we had to fight to use the word "condom," and to show a condom on the air. But in the end, we did. I guess we do get away with all kinds of outrageous things. I mean, in the upcoming sex episode [yeah, yeah, I'm behind -- so sue me.] we have this Britney Spears parody, and she uses the line, "Pet my silky fur." It was never shot down by the network. Every once in a while we have to make a very few easy compromises, but we have never had to abandon something we were totally committed to. I think the network, and the fans, respect the fact that the show has a message, that it's not just some stupid dreck. Amorgan: (pondering this last statement) Yesss. So, you must get this reference a lot, but this show seems to draw quite a bit of inspiration from Parker Lewis Can't Lose. RM: You know, I have never seen that show! I never really watched TV, and I don't really watch it now. So, yes, I get that one a lot, but, no. I have no idea. All the characters are our own creation. And I love them. I love that I got to introduce Mary Cherry and April Tuna to the world. Amorgan: Those characters are brilliant. RM: Thank you! We're going to be doing a lot more with those two, and with the concept of fame. In episode eleven, Carmen is finally going to make the cheerleading squad, and April is going to stalk her. Amorgan: Can I print that? Would I be giving too much away? RM: Oh, yeah -- go ahead. It's not giving too much away at all. Again, I'm really excited about it. That's also the episode in which all the cheerleaders get their drivers' licenses and get total makeovers to go to the DMV for their license pictures. Amorgan: So, who's going to come out first? RM: I don't know! We haven't decided yet. Now I can tell you that in episode nine, it'll be revealed that Harrison's mom is a lesbian, but I honestly can't tell you which of the kids is going to come out.
Amorgan: Come on . . . are you sure you don't know? RM: Okay, we have a pretty good idea, but I can't tell you. It won't be until the end of the season, anyway. Amorgan: [Again, I have no idea what I said here.] RM: You know, in the first year, we're not really interested in serious coupledom anyway. Maybe later, but for now, I want all the relationships to stay fluid. Everything is subject to change. Amorgan: So what's your sign? RM: Triple Scorpio. Amorgan: Damn! RM: Yep, that's me, totally Scorpio -- brooding, intense, loyal, the whole nine. What about you? Amorgan: Quadruple Virgo. It's kind of maddening. RM: Wow. You may have me beat. Amorgan: Okay, Ryan, how old are those actors, anyway? RM: You are so mean! All the kids are in their early twenties and late teens. But the show is all about glamour, so we dress them in a way that might make them look . . . hard. The look is straight out of old Hollywood, Bette Davis, Joan Crawford, Audrey Hepburn. You pick on poor Tammy [Lynn Michaels, a.k.a. Nicole Julian], but when I first met her, she was straight off the bus from Indiana, and just a clean-scrubbed as you please. Amorgan: How long have you been in television? RM: This is the first thing that I've ever done. Originally, Popular was going to be a movie. I had this screenplay, and my agent suggested that it might do well as a series, so I shopped it around to the networks. All four networks bid on it, but we went with the WB because they seem to give shows more of a chance. Amorgan: Congratulations! That must feel really good. And how long have you known Gina Matthews? RM: Three years. She was my manager, originally, and we got to talking about high school and ambition and popularity, and decided that we could put together a really great story. Because, as I mentioned before, it's not really about high school at all. That's just the setting. In a way it's a lot about Hollywood. You have this popularity, this power, and once you taste it, you become desperate not to lose it. And that's going to be the experience of the characters in the show. All the characters will have their roller-coaster experience with fame. They will feel the rush, and they will taste the sorrow. Amorgan: So what's the deal with Mary Cherry trolling for talent in that big rig in the Mr. Cluck's parking lot? RM: (Laughing) Why does everyone think that that was a big rig? It's a Humvee! We'll be clearing up that misconception when the girls get their drivers' licenses. And she was not turning tricks, by the way.
Amorgan: If you say so. RM: She wasn't! That's just not part of the show. (cleverly changing the subject -- or else my notes lead me to believe that he did) You know, I was giving an interview to [some damn New York publication] the other day, and the guy that I was talking to told me that we are getting a huge cult following among the celebrity population. Amorgan: Um, you know you have to tell me all about that. Like who? RM: Well, I can't remember them all, but here's a partial list: Madonna, Gwyneth (whom we reference in every show), Howard Stern, Steven Spielberg, Ben Stiller, and Courtney Love. Amorgan: Howard Stern?! RM: Apparently he really likes it. I think people get into the show because real people can relate to it. I mean, it's got these elements of insane comedy, but it's got good characterization, too. Plus it's completely pop culture-obsessed, which is practically irresistible. Amorgan: Who are the people in the pictures on the wall of the Kim Novak ladies' lounge? RM: That is the Homecoming Queen Hall of Fame. We actually hired models for those pictures and dressed them up, five apiece from the seventies, eighties, and nineties. They even have little plaques under their pictures with their names -- we gave them all totally outlandish names like Misty, Cloudy, Sunny, Lou Lou. And of course now Brooke is going to be up on the wall. Amorgan: What's the deal with the musical? Was it rescheduled when Mr. Vincent got fired? RM: Yeah, it got rescheduled to episode eleven, which will air in January. Amorgan: [something about Carmen's weight vs. Sugar Daddy's] RM: We've gotten a lot of feedback about that, and we're going to be addressing it more and more in upcoming episodes. The Sadie Hawkins dance is going to have some interesting moments. Sugar Daddy is going to go on this crazy diet plan called Diet Right Now, which is a plan aimed exclusively at teens. It's going to be so much fun. We'll have complimentary scales stationed throughout the halls of the school, and everyone will be eating these little packaged diet meals consisting of a celery stick, a diet pill and a cigarette. Amorgan: (laughing out of control) Can you do that? Can you do that on network television? RM: It's already done! Of course we can. (innocently) Why wouldn't we? Episode thirteen is going to be the body-image episode, and we'll focus a lot on the fact that girls aren't the only ones with body-image problems.
Amorgan: So what kind of fan base do you have? What kind of feedback have you been getting? Anything really weird or freaky? RM: Well, we don't really get much feedback directly from the fans. Most of that stuff goes straight to the Internet now. We have gotten some requests from prisoners for cast pictures, but we haven't sent them any. Amorgan: Aw. Why pick on the poor prisoners? RM: Now what do you think a prisoner would do with a cast picture of all these squeaky clean young people? Amorgan: Okay, okay. Point taken. Anything else? RM: We did get some complaints from the NAACP at first, because they felt that there wasn't enough minority representation on the show, but we've taken their remarks very seriously, and have added more minority characters, which has been good. We're going to be seeing a lot more of Cleopatra Teenage Lady Soul. Amorgan: Awesome. That's very cool. You work very hard on this show at keeping a good balance between wacky hijinks and serious drama. RM: We do. I think the best entertainment does that, the funniest comedies. One of my favorite movies of all time is Terms of Endearment, which walks that line beautifully. Another great example is Thelma and Louise. In episode eight we're going to be dealing with sex in a way that's both dramatic and funny. For example, Brooke becomes obsessed with this magazine called Promiscuous Girl -- Amorgan: No way! (laughing too hard to sound smart at all) Wow! Go on -- RM: But, the sad part is that Brooke and Josh are going to break up after they do It. Amorgan: [something which prompts RM to talk about how loony Brooke is.] RM: Because our Brooke is not the most stable girl, you know. All the dating is going to get really out of hand. Sam's going to date Josh, Lily's going to go on a date with Emory Dick [Creepy Boy -- ew!], Brooke and Harrison might get together. It'll all be very awkward, and very high school. You know, very few people really couple in high school. It's all about "going together." Amorgan: Are you already making plans for season? RM: No. We don't know if it's going to be extended. Of course, it may be. Our demographic beat ER, and it's rated the third highest show on TV right now. ["I think he means ‘in the demographic.’ Popular is barely on the Nielsen radar right now." -- Sars] Amorgan: Do the kids get to keep the clothes that they wear on the show? And how much is the lip gloss budget, anyway?
RM: The kids do not get to keep the clothes. I know it's sad, but they're just too expensive. They stay in wardrobe. Most of them are on loan, anyway. As for the lip gloss budget, it's at least $600 per show. Actually I just made that up. But it's really up there. We go through about one tube of lip gloss per girl, per day, and I'm damned proud of it! Amorgan: Who does the directing? RM: We get a new director every week. Directors get one week of prep, eight days to shoot the show, and one week of editing. Amorgan: Wow. Well, it's remarkably consistent. I guess that's what the week of prep is for, right? RM: Right. We've got a very severe design aesthetic going on. Very 1961 -- 1963 (the Jackie years). Clean lines, almost no texture, clear cool colors, and very few pastels. If we have to go pastel, it should be pink. I hate red and yellow with a passion, and have even sent out memos stating that red and yellow should never be used on the show unless it's an emergency. Amorgan: What did you dress up as for Halloween? RM: Aw. Nothing. I was really tired. I just hung out with Chris and Anel, who went as Mia Farrow and John Cassavetes in Rosemary's Baby. [Chris and Anel are the actors who play Harrison and Poppy.] Amorgan: Are you going to have some scenes where Harrison and Poppy hook up? It might be nice for them to work together like that on the show. RM: I feel very strongly that real life couples shouldn't play couples on screen. I don't know if I can explain why, exactly. It just seems . . . wrong somehow. [That's a wild paraphrase, but I think that's what he was trying to say.] However, Chris and Leslie [Mary Cherry] are really good friends, and we have been working on a whole subplot for them in which Mary Cherry becomes obsessed with Harrison, but she thinks his name is Joe. Amorgan: That's going to be hilarious! Mary Cherry is undoubtedly one of your most successful characters. RM: Well, Leslie first auditioned for the role of Nicole, but the chemistry wasn't there between her Nicole and the other Leslie's Brooke. But we liked her so much that we ended up creating the part of Mary Cherry just for her. I just fed her a few pieces of information, that I had an idea for a fundamentalist Christian cheerleader from Dallas who was secretly very wicked, and Leslie's face lit up. The first thing she said was, "I bet her daddy was a Promise Keeper." And we knew. She's been rolling with it ever since. The only other person we have created a role for is Anel, who initially read for Lily's role. Again, she wasn't quite right, but we liked her so much that we created Poppy Fresh. Poppy has a lot coming up in episode eleven, when the girls go to the DMV. There's going to be a lot of focus on the evil cheerleaders and the mischief they get up to.
Amorgan: Speaking of evil cheerleaders, why is Nicole so damned mean? RM: You are asking all the right questions! [I just made that part up, but, again, I'm sure that's what he was thinking.] Episode ten is going to be all about Nicole Julian. You will soon understand why she is so mean, and why she will never, ever change. Amorgan: How often do you change the sheets on your bed? Or do you have a maid to do that? RM: I have a maid. But the sheets get changed twice a week. You know, I'm very particular about my sheets. They have to be one hundred percent cotton, with a high thread count. Only cotton. No flannel. I love crispy, cool sheets. If I can make a product endorsement -- Amorgan: By all means. RM: There is the most amazing stuff, called Agua de Parma [?], it's a wonderful powder that you sprinkle between the sheets before you get into bed, and it makes you feel just like summer. A little trick I picked up from Kevin Costner, you know. Amorgan: Of course. So, is there a thread count that you won't fall below? RM: Three hundred is about as low as I will take. I can live with three hundred. Amorgan: This is another standard question. Who would you rather do It with, Bret Michaels or Tommy Lee? RM: You know, ever since I saw that VH1 Behind the Music with Poison, I've had a real soft spot for Bret Michaels. Or was that Where Are They Now? At any rate, he was just so nice. I pick him. Amorgan: And what's currently your favorite restaurant? RM: Oooh. Right now it's this great place called Mishima. It's a cool Asian persuasion place, mostly Japanese. My favorite thing to eat there is the spicy tuna roll. ["Hey, I just ate at Mishima tonight! Oh, but it’s probably a different Mishima, right? Okay, I’ll shut up now." -- Sars] Amorgan: What's your favorite place to shop? RM: (without hesitation) Barney's. Either New York or Los Angeles. I love it because they have the best selection of black clothes, and also because I always run into Michelle Pfeiffer and Meg Ryan. I love to follow people around, especially celebrities, and watch them be really cheap. I mean, these are people who should never have to look at a price tag again in their lives, and they just go nuts. Amorgan: If you could do It with anyone in the world, living or dead, who would it be and why? RM: Audrey Hepburn. But I wouldn't really do It with her. I would tell everyone that I did, but we would really just sit on the bed and talk.
Amorgan: Hee hee. I think that's the perfect note on which to end the interview. Thanks so much for your time. RM: No, thank you, amorgan! You are by far the wittiest, most charming conversationalist I have ever had the pleasure to know. [Um, or something like that.]