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Once Upon A Time, in the Enchanted Past, Snow and Charming marry. Regina crashes the wedding to taunt them. Charming hurls his sword at her, so she disappears in a puff of smoke. Hey, I already recapped this.
After the wedding, Charming suggests a honeymoon. Snow resists at first. She can't relax with Regina on the loose and hellbent on revenge. Eventually, though, she suggests they honeymoon at her parents' summer castle. I can't decide what castle or palace they're in, when she makes this suggestion. I don't think Regina ever vacates Knifingham Palace, until she creates Storybrooke.
Snow makes her summer castle suggestion because she has a hidden agenda. Medusa lives in a cave nearby. Snow wants to cut off the Gorgon's head and use it to turn Regina to stone. Charming figures it out pretty quick, and quips that since he fell in love with Snow on a Troll Bridge, after she'd robbed him and hit him over the head with a rock, he knew what he was getting into when he married her. Poor Charming. You should have stayed a shepherd. In the course of their Gorgon hunt, Medusa makes eye contact with Charming, turns him to stone, which surprises no one.
Regina appears in the reflective center of a discarded shield to taunt Snow some more. The Evil Queen laughs that about the fact that she didn't have to lift a finger to destroy Snow's happiness. Snow did so on her own.
Snow realizes Regina is right, but also realizes how to defeat Medusa. She peels the leatherwork off the shield, so the entire surface is reflective, summons Medusa and holds up the shield. Medusa is, as most of us are, her own undoing.
In the denouement, Snow and Charming share a quiet moment. Snow confesses she wants to start a family. Charming feels the same way. Snow realizes she was so focused on defeating Regina, because she didn't want to bring a child into a world filled with such badness. Now Snow knows there will always be problems; they have to find good moments between the bad. This is a reminder I desperately needed, Show (and Show), so I thank you for that.
Now in Storybrooke, Belle reunites Ariel with Eric. Operation Cobra Rescue, Wendy, Tink, the Lost Boys and Panry (Pan in Henry's body) return to Storybrooke. I hope Belle has unlimited texting on her phone plan, because after she spies the Jolly Roger flying back into town (and there is a visual effect that marks it passing through a portal) the whole town arrives at the docks to welcome the hometown heroes (and villains).
None of the reunion feels right, because it isn't right. Jared Gilmore does a fine job as Panry. But Pan isn't quite as adept at pretending to be Henry. During the welcome home party at Granny's, Emma quickly twigs to the fact that "Henry" isn't himself. When Panry decides he wants to spend the night at Regina's, Regina is too blinded by love to see the truth.
In other developments, I think we might be rid of the Darlings. As soon as Wendy reunites with her once younger but now older brothers, the Hipster Doofi suggest returning home. This is another moment that's scripted and shot as if it's happy, but I can't help but think that their parents must be dead (unless Pan did some as yet unknown thing), and that someone else could be living in their home.
During the party, Hook and Neal have a moment, when Hook confides that he's going to stand aside and give Neal a fair shot at winning Emma's heart. He's explicit that he's doing so for Henry's sake. He also admits that he's in it for the long haul, though, as he's unconvinced that Emma can overcome the fact that Neal abandoned her. In the context of Hook's history with Milah, and how that affected Baelfire, Hook's comment about standing aside for the sake of the boy is such an understated redemptive moment. Don't screw it up, Killian.
Of course Hook tries to botch his long game, the very day, in a clunky attempt to seduce Tink. While Blue refused to restore her wings, Tink's in full possession of her intuition. She knows Hook just wants to use her to get over Emma, and has no interest in a Hook up (how could I not...). Still, Hook and Tink inadvertently rouse a smidgeon of jealousy from Emma and Hook does try to capitalize on it.
Emma's too busy to have a life, right now, though. She knows something isn't right with Henry. Soon after Pan's shadow steals Blue's shadow (is she permanently dead?), Emma has nearly figured out the puzzle. Panry manipulates Regina into taking him to her vault, to protect him. Since Emma knows something is off about the boy, she tries to warn Regina, Regina assumes Emma is just jealous, and hurries Panry off to the last place he should ever be.
Emma convinces a reluctant Gold to give her Pandora's Box. He, Belle, Snow, Charming and Emma drive out to the town line. Emma crosses the line. Gold opens the box and places it outside of the town limit's, where Pan will have no access to magic. Henry, in Pan's body (Hen) finally appears and has to convince Emma not to shoot him. He does so by telling her when they first connected (not met): when they were on his castle play structure and he admitted he knew she only gave him away to give him his best shot. On paper, Henry's reunion with his family is heartwarming. In my living room, though, it leaves me cold, since it's Robbie Kay in the role. He's talented, but he's not my Henry.
Meanwhile, back at the mausoleum, Panry uses one of Regina's own potions against her to knock her out. He then ransacks the vault until he finds the Dark Curse. He breaks Felix out of the town jail and shares his plan. He'll cast the curse and create a new Neverland. Watch out for your heart, Felix. Read the fine print. Actually, your heart is probably safe. I guess Gold should watch out for his heart, but if this story is true to Pan's character, that should be about as effective as when Regina sacrificed her prized stallion. The thing Pan loves best is Pan. Nothing short of magic will convince me otherwise.
I'll be back with the recap, ASAP. In the meantime, please grade the episode up top, and then join us on the boards, where we're hiding that Once Upon A Time book from Panry, because he's already read way too much of it.
Want more? The full recap starts right below!Once Upon A Time, there was a beautiful mermaid named Ariel. One dark and stormy night at sea, she came upon a shipwreck and saved the life of Prince Eric, and later pined for him, and a human life, from afar. Finally, thanks in part to our own Snow White, Ariel met her prince. Because he had been unconscious at the time she saved him, he didn't know Ariel was a mermaid, tail and all. He didn't know she was only at his castle to meet him, thanks to a one day leg clause in her mythology. He felt like he knew her, though. Rather than court her, he immediately invited her to go on the road with him. Um? Ariel was afraid to tell him that she was actually a mermaid. Then, well, Regina happened, as is her wont. Later still, Regina happened again, in that she cast the Dark Curse, which swept Eric off to Storybrooke. Then Regina happened in a different way than Regina usually happens. Well, somewhat. She needed something from Ariel, and after that mission had been accomplished, she gave Ariel a magical bracelet which allowed her to have legs or a tail. Ariel returned to Storybrooke.
Now, in Storybrooke, Ariel's new old friend Belle locates Eric for her and brings Ariel to the docks to meet him. They find Eric filleting fish. After he chops the head off of one, Ariel says to Belle, "Wow, he must really hate me." Yeah, that should be a cute joke. Eric's chop is swift, brutal and matter of fact. Ariel's horrified expression is priceless, and her line delivery is smooth. The problem is, the joke makes no frigging sense at all, in the context of Ariel's backstory (on Once Upon A Time) because Eric barely knows Ariel, and that she never admitted she was a mermaid is a huge point in their OUAT history, to date.
The first time Ariel and Eric met, he was unconscious. The second time they met, they had one dance, a largely awkward conversation and a rather presumptuous invitation to a road trip. As a "couple" they have had none of the experiences that makes the audience root for them, or even care about them, so when they "reunite" and kiss, it is beyond hollow. Any good will the audience has for this pairing was front-loaded by the Disney film, The Little Mermaid. It was not earned by Once Upon A Time.
This isn't the first time that Once Upon A Time has squandered emotional resonance. The sad thing is, on this show, there is so much potential for emotional pay-off, that it is low-hanging fruit, ripe, delicious, and left uneaten in favor of fast food. Far too often, that fruit falls to the ground, only to be crushed by the plodding hoofs of plot. Often, the audience is supposed to accept that these moments happen off screen. This audience member is tired of accepting that. Where Ariel is concerned, however, it didn't even happen off screen. Ariel and Eric have no more of a relationship than you have with that hot person you got to dance with at that nightclub, that one time.
That vented, let's move on. Watching Ariel and Eric kiss moves Belle to tears. Of course, since Belle's own twu wuv is an exercise in Stockholm Syndrome, I don't know what I'm expecting. Thank goodness the focus changes. Look, up in the sky. It's a bird. It's a plane. It's a flying pirate ship. We're finally off Neverland, folks. Hurrah! Belle whispers, "He's back." The title card features Medusa, because why not.
Sidebar: Some audience members take issue with the fact that the magically protected Storybrooke is accessible to those aboard the Jolly Roger. I do not. Gold crafted the protection spell. While he assumed he'd have to die on Neverland, they set out for Neverland in order to bring Henry back to Storybrooke. I imagine the protection spell was only to keep outsiders from finding Storybrooke. This isn't something I need explained on screen.
By the time the Jolly Roger docks, the townsfolk have gathered to greet the less than conquering heroes. There are loving slow-mo shots of each person leaving the ship, which put me in mind of the passengers of Oceanic 815 disembarking in the Sideways reality, on Lost. The problem is, that scene, even though it wasn't real, meant something, because it was rewarding to have that what-if moment, with all the people (some, by then, dead) who suffered so on Craphole Island. It made me want to hug them all, maybe even Frogurt.
On Once Upon A Time, as Operation Cobra Rescue, etc. leave the Jolly Roger, I want to scold Emma, Regina, and Gold (at least), for not realizing that the boy who looks like Henry is actually Panry (i.e. Pan in Henry's body). I can't get into all the reunion embraces between the returnees and townsfolk like Belle, Granny, Grumpy, etc., because they're all being fooled. It figures that when Once Upon A Time finally delivers some heartfelt payoff, that is payoff is every bit as false as Tamara's "love" for Neal. Sigh.
As neighbors, friends and lovers embrace, Regina stands off to the side, forever alone. Wendy is among the last of the passengers to leave the ship. She brings Neal over to her brothers and says, "You remember Baelfire." The four hug, and Neal asks, "Now what?" John says, "I think it's time for the Darlings to go home," to a house that probably belongs to some other family by now, and the cold, hard graves of their parents. Um, yay? In another reunion, Belle is thrilled to see her lovah, and happy, but not at all surprised, to see that Neal is with him and alive. Sheesh.
Snow asks Charming how he's feeling. He thinks the Neverland water is working. Hook confirms this and explains the Dreamshade overcame Liam, as soon as they were out of Neverland. Snow and Charming are confident Gold will produce a cure. Emma says something about how she had moments where she thought they'd never get off that godforsaken rock (paraphrase). Regina is still off to the side, forever alone, as she probably should be, but Snow, being Snow, makes a show of saying they owe her nemesis a lot of their success. "Regina helped save us all." Regina is a bit taken aback, I think not only by Snow's gracious spirit, but also by the realization that damn, she just saved everyone she's been bent on tormenting for decades. We flash back to the...
Enchanted Past. At Snow and Charming's wedding, Regina swears she will destroy their happiness, if it is the last thing she does. As she swoops out, Charming tosses his sword at her, but she disappears in a puff of smoke. We cut to the palace...
War Room. Snow storms in. Charming follows and tries to calm her down. Hell hath no fury like a bride whose step-mother ruins her special day. Snow is determined to find a way to strike back. Charming suggests that being happy, i.e. going on their honeymoon, is the best way to show Regina she cannot destroy their happiness. Today, all Regina has done is threaten them. Charming says, "Let's not ruin this moment. Let's not ruin our honeymoon." Snow's interest is piqued when he says they can go anywhere she wants to go. She tells him she always dreamed of honeymooning at the summer palace. The newlyweds kiss and Charming says he'll make preparations for their journey. He lays a passionate, if quick, surprise smooch on his bride and races off. Shouldn't they have a ballroom full of guests waiting for them? After Regina's stunt, did they just rudely dismiss everyone who attended the wedding?
Anyhow, Grumpy enters and it's clear he's been eavesdropping, but he claims the masonry is thin. He is not so crazy about the idea of Snow and Charming honeymooning, while Queenie is on the warpath. He heard what Charming said, but he wants to know what Snow thinks. Snow's eyes twinkle with mischief as she tells her old friend that she thinks there is something at the summer palace that will help them defeat Regina once and for all. Oh Snow, you sly boots. We flash forward to...
Storybrooke. Charming loads Chekhov's gun by asking Gold what the deal is with the Shadow. Gold explains that it is sealed to the sail, and the only person who can free it is locked in Pandora's Box. Face meet palm.
Panry wanders over to Felix, who asks what he has in mind. Felix is worried someone will open the box and free the "real boy." His phrasing gives me unsatisfactory August flashbacks. Make it stop! Felix wants to know what their step is. Panry says, "You need to be punished." All season, I've been trying to ignore the Pan story's pederast subtext, but sometimes, I cannot. Thankfully, I can report that Panry distracts me when he shouts out, "Hey mom, dad, what about Felix? He's still free." Emma, Neal, Regina and Charming approach. Regina says "Henry" is right. Charming drags tall, light, and lanky off to a cell. Emma tells "Henry" he's safe, now. We cut to...
Gold's Shop. Panry, Emma, Neal, Regina, and Belle look on, as Gold puts Pandora's Box in the secret compartment under the floor. The adults all try to reassure Panry that Pan is no longer a threat. Gold promises, "As long as I'm alive, that boy will never see the light of day." Commercial.
After the break, we return to Gold's shop. He's in his civvies, now, and Belle helps him straighten his tie. Their talk turns to the future, a future Gold never expected to have. Belle says neither the boy nor Pan proved to be his undoing, so now he can stop worrying about prophecies. I agree he should stop thinking about prophecies, but I still wish these two would consider other definitions of undoing. The future Gold wants is one where he and Belle are together. Belle tears up at that, and they kiss. We cut to...
Granny's Diner. In the midst of the "Welcome Home" shindig, Emma brings Panry "his" Once Upon A Time book. Since he's not actually Henry, Panry doesn't know how to react, and his strange reception of the book is not lost on Emma. When she asks if he's okay, he says, "Yeah, why?"
Seated at the counter, Hook furrows his brow, as watches the scene unfold. Neal approaches and snarks that he doesn't think Granny serves rum. I don't know about that, Neal. Once Upon A Time, I'm pretty sure Mary Margaret and Whale were pounding shots of whiskey, and maybe Sidney got snookered there, too.
Hook assures Neal that he's not there to pursue "the Lady Swan." When Neal doubts him, Hook says, "I made a decision when it comes to Emma. I'm gonna back off. [...] for the sake of the boy -- let his parents have a fair shot, without a devilishly handsome pirate standing in the way." When Neal asks if he's serious, Hook nods. "Yeah, I am devilishly handsome." Yeah you are, but it is your charm that has the fandom swooning, Killian. Okay, and the eyeliner. Neal gives a cheerful, "Thanks man." Hook: "Oh, don't thank me, yet. You see, I'm in this for the long haul. You've already walked out on Emma, once. I'm not so sure she'll let you back in. Are you?"
Neal's chagrinned expression is a better, more honest answer than words could ever provide. He slides off the stool and we cut to Blue who is talking and laughing with Grumpy and Happy. Shouldn't being around Blue make Grumpy even grumpier, still? Wouldn't it be nice to have Amy Acker's Astrid return for just one episode? When Grumpy and Astrid met up in Storybrooke, they were still under the curse and had no memory of their history. Someday, Show, I hope you give us some satisfaction on this front. I know Grumpy is a secondary character, but just barely. He's generally the voice of the Dwarfs. He is one of Snow's best friends. His story shouldn't just dangle forever.
Regina and Tink enter the party and approach Blue, who greets Tink with gasp. "Green!" Regina snarls, "Her name is Tinker Bell. [...] Give her her wings back." Blue snits that she doesn't take orders from Regina. Regina tries to reason with her. Yes, that's right. I just said that Regina tries to reason with an irrational, magical woman. "She helped us. She's earned it. She even got Pixie Dust to work again." When Blue wants to see proof, Tink shows her the vial, and stammers that she only got it to work, briefly. She can't produce on command. Blue sneers. "Well then there's your problem. [...] You don't believe in yourself anymore. How can I believe in you, if you can't even do that?" When Blue brushes past her, Tink looks at Regina and says, "I need a drink."
Panry's still at his booth, flipping through Henry's book, when Neal approaches Emma in the middle of the diner. He asks if they can make time to talk. Emma asks if that's not what they're doing. Neal looks around as if to point out they're in the middle of a party, glances at Panry, then smiles at Emma, because he knows he needs to earn it. "Yeah, I thought maybe just the two of us." Emma cringes as she asks if he's trying to ask her on a date. Neal says, "You know, when you put it like that..."
Emma interrupts. "Neal, I don't know..." Neal says, "Listen, Henry's back, and he's safe. We all are." Neal backs up a little, and starts talking with his hands. "Okay look, I'll make it -- I'll make it easier for you. Tomorrow, I'm going to be hungry, right around lunch time." Emma blinks and her face relaxes into a smile. Neal continues: "And so I'm going to come here," he turns and gestures toward Panry. "...And I'm going to sit in that booth, and you're welcome to join me." He keeps his tone light as he adds, "...And if not? I'll quit bugging you." To prove his point, he walks off, to give Emma her space.
I'm not on your team, Neal, but that was extremely good form. You're wise not to squander the time and opportunity Hook has given you. When you realized Emma felt pressured, you took the pressure off, without giving up on her. Keep it up, and you might just change my mind about you and the Lady Swan. Okay, I just made myself think of Hook, so probably not. Still, I'm trying to be fair. Tell the writers that if they want us to take you as a serious contender for Emma's affections, they need to script it such that you make sure people (especially your son and Emma's parents) understand your part in Emma imprisonment. Also, you need to acknowledge you were just engaged to Tamara. I don't need you to mourn her. You thought you were in love with her, but she was using you, and everything she gave you was a lie. You also have to offer us something, so that we can trust you never stopped loving Emma. I don't know what that something is, but it better be good. Also, it wouldn't hurt if Charming got to punch you in the nose, and if you took that graciously, as way less than you have coming to you. Emotional payoff: I demand it.
Snow and Charming walk up behind Emma. Some people on the boards think they've been listening. I'm not so sure that's true, but I suppose they might have overheard some of it. Emma tells them, "Don't say it." Snow asks, "Say what?" Emma doesn't want to hear she owes Neal a date. Snow says, "You don't. You owe it to yourself." Emma says she can't think about herself after what Henry just endured. When she walks off, Charming asks Snow, "Now who does she remind me of?" Snow grins. We flash back to the...
Enchanted Past. Charming carries Snow over the threshold and into the summer palace. When he tries to get frisky, Snow tells him, "Not so fast." He reminds her they've hardly had any time alone. Snow tells him she has something in store for him, and it's worth the wait. When he leaves to stable the horses, Snow throws off her cape, opens her weapons chest, arms herself, and hops out the nearest window. She runs through the forest until she's confronted by a waiting Charming. Ha.
Snow asks Charming how he knew she was up to something. He could tell by the look on her face. Snow: "What look?" Charming: "The look you have when you're up to something." Snow gives us what I have come to think of as Emma's look. She takes in his words, blinks, looks off to the side and realizes he's right. He figures her excursion has to do with Regina's thread. Snow explains that Medusa supposedly lives in the nearby woods. She was hoping that by cutting off her head, they could use it to turn Regina to stone. Charming: "And what? Sending it to her in a box?" Heh. Snow hasn't yet figured out the logistics. She can do that after she has the head. Charming says absolutely not. "I'm not letting my wife venture into the woods to chase some monster." Off Snow's disappointed look, he adds, "At least not alone." He only asks that if they find Medusa, Snow will promise to enjoy what's left of their honeymoon. Snow nods, draws her sword and hands it to Charming. "Good thing I brought this." We flash forward to...
Granny's. Panry is looking at an illustration of Snow handing Charming the sword. He turns the page and we see a picture of Hansel and Gretel. Emma makes her way back to his booth and tells him it is bedtime. When they stop to say goodnight to Regina, she says it's going to be hard to let him out of her sight. Panry proposes staying with Regina tonight. Regina jumps at the chance. Emma is surprised, but covers as well as she can, and tells him to call her tomorrow when he wants to be picked up. Thrilled, Regina leads Panry out of the diner, before he or Emma change their minds.
The scene is not lost on Snow. She wanders over to Emma and says, "That's okay. He probably just wants to spend his first night back in his old room." Emma's Spidey sense is tingling as she watches Mother and son walk out the door. "Yeah, I'm sure that's it." She's not sure at all. We cut to the...
Mayoral Manse. In Henry's room, Panry opens the Once Upon A Time book to an illustration of Regina, in full Evil Queen get-up, standing in front of her vault. He mills about the room, glances at an Avengers comic, and spins the record on Henry's record player (!) before Regina comes in and tells him it's lights out. Panry asks Regina if she brought her vault over with her. He lies that he might need that stuff to protect himself from Pan. Regina assures him Pan can't hurt him, since he's locked up. When Panry continues to press the case, Regina tells him, "Magic isn't the answer." That is a HUGE thing for Regina to say. I mean, first she tries to reason with Blue. Now she's admitting magic isn't the answer. Knock me over with a feather.
Regina goes on to explain that since her vault is dangerous, it is sealed. She tells Panry she'll protect him, no matter what. When he climbs under the covers, she bends down, smoothes his hair and kisses his cheek. She caresses his face one last time, before she says, "Goodnight." Some people think her actions as creepy. All three of my kids are older than Henry. I would be just as affectionate with any of them, particularly if I'd just saved them from Neverland (or was under the impression that I had). Get your minds out of the gutter, people. Not all physical affection is sexual.
Once Regina switches off the light, leaves, and closes the door behind her, Panry hops out of bed. He throws open the window and says Regina is wrong. "Magic is the answer." When he says, "It's time," the Shadow is released from the sail. It soars through Storybrooke, past the clock tower, and into commercial.
After the break, we return to the Enchanted Past. Charming slashes at the brush as if there's no tomorrow (or perhaps just as if he had other ideas when suggesting a honeymoon to his blushing bride). When Snow asks if he's mad, he says, "I fell in love with you on a troll bridge, after you robbed me, and hit me over the head with a rock. I knew what I was getting myself into." Snow has to smile at that. I can't remember the last time Charming has been so quotable. I like it, Show. Keep it up. I don't like the "Prince Dullard" meme that has infected the fandom.
Snow and Charming exposit some Medusa mythology. The only way to free Medusa's victims is to kill Medusa, but no one knows how. Charming asks Snow if she's sure she wants to turn Regina to stone. After all, she did stop Regina's execution. Snow says that last time, Regina threatened the two of them. This time, she's threatened the whole kingdom. Charming says they've protected the kingdom before. He knows there's something else going on and asks Snow why she can't get Regina out of her mind. Snow doesn't know. She just can't. By now they've reached the entrance to Medusa's supposed cave, but it doesn't look a whole lot different from a mausoleum. We flash forward to...
Granny's Diner. It's the following day. Charming and Snow are seated at a booth. Charming says, "I never thought Granny's lasagna could taste so good." Snow laughs. They're interrupted by Gold who places a bottle of Dreamshade antidote on the table. Charming wants to make sure there are no strings attached. Gold says it's on the house, but can't help but point out that now that they're family, he's sure if he needed a favor, the Charmings would be receptive. Ha.
Once Gold walks off, Snow encourages Charming to take the cure. After he drinks it, his hand travels to the site of his wound. After taking a few heavy breaths, he smiles and kisses Snow. I guess that's it, and I'm fine with that. We spent way too much time on this plot point, back in Neverland. Charming suggests that maybe it's time to start trying to make a baby. Snow's expression grows grim. Charming clarifies that he didn't mean to start right this moment, but that's not the problem. Since the couple in the booth behind Charming are now gone, Snow sees that Neal is sitting alone, one booth past that. "Emma didn't listen to us." Charming says, "I've got this," and rushes out. We cut to the...
Waterfront. Charming finds Emma alone, fiddling with her phone. The poor dear looks so tense, but I suppose that's a good thing, considering a monster is living in her son's body, while her son is trapped in Pandora's Box. Charming's voice beckons Emma back to this world, when he points out Granny's is in the other direction. When Emma asks, Charming tells her Neal has no idea he's come after her. He just wanted to make sure Emma is okay. She says it's not Neal that has her worried, but Henry, who just doesn't seem like himself. Charming reminds her the boy went through a lot in Neverland. He also doesn't think Emma should sweat the fact that Henry spent the night at Regina's.
Emma already knows all this, but she can't shake the feeling something else bad is going to happen. Charming tells Emma not to think like that. Yes, bad things keep happening, but so do good things. You can't always be spoiling for the fight. You have to look for the good moments between the bad. Emma asks her dad if he thinks lunch with Neal would be a good moment. Charming says, "I don't know. Does he eat with his mouth open?" I think you mean chew, since it's awfully hard to eat with a closed mouth, but I'm still giving you points for humor, Charming.
Emma enjoys this small, good moment with her father, then admits she's not sure she's ready. Charming asks what's the harm in finding out. As they rise, Charming offers her a ride to Granny's and his arm. Emma hooks her arm in her father's. "Are you sure you don't have other reasons for pushing me towards Neal?" Charming: "Like what?" Emma says, "I don't know, like keeping me away from Hook." Charming blinks, stops in his tracks and looks at his daughter. "You think I'm interested in Hook? Emma, I'm a married man!" Ha. Emma cringes and reluctantly chuckles at the Dad-humor, but I love it. We cut to...
Granny's. Hook enters through the back door. I can't help but think he's there to spy on the not-a-date-lunch-date. When Tink exits the ladies room, she bumps right into him and asks if he's okay. When he says he's "fine, love," she starts off, but he catches up to her and turns up the flirtation. It's clear he's been at the rum, but he's not falling over. When he asks Tink if she'd like to share a drink, Tink says, "We both know you want more than a drink. You want me to help take your mind off Emma." Has she been down this road with him, before? Hook tries to front. "Emma? Who's Emma? I only see you." Tink is having none of it. "I may have lost my wings, but I haven't lost my dignity. That's never going to happen." They're interrupted the sounds of screams coming from outside.
Hook and Tink arrive at the sidewalk, just as Charming's truck arrives at the curb. In some funky editing, Charming gets out of the truck twice. Emma has only had to get out once so she has time to react to the screaming and says, "What the hell was that?" Hook says, "We had the same question." Emma looks from Hook to Tink. Hook looks from Emma, to Tink. Tink looks from Emma to Hook and then back again. Emma says, "Wait, were you two..." Tink says, "No!" Hook, realizing he just stumbled into some luck, waits a beat and says, "Perhaps." Now that Charming's finally done getting out of the truck, he takes a good listen to the screams, says, "There," and runs between his daughter and his new buddy and toward trouble. Tink follows. Emma gives Hook a pointed look and chases after them. Hook brings up the rear. We cut to the...
Convent. Well, I think it's the convent. It's some big building. Blue runs up the steps. The Shadow swoops down, grabs her shadow, and flies off with it, leaving Blue lifeless on the ground. Charming says she's gone. Tink asks why the Shadow would kill her. Hook has no idea, but reminds them the Shadow only takes orders from one person. Emma says, "Pan." We cut to...
Henry's room. Panry is reading the Once Upon A Time book, when Regina opens his door and tells him to come with her, because something has happened. Panry couldn't look less surprised or more delighted. Commercial.
We return to the Enchanted Past. Snow and Charming are now inside Medusa's cave, with isn't a cave at all. It has bright mosaic floors and constructed walls, some of which are broken, but you know, it's not a natural cave. Charming draws Medusa out, and leads her past a hiding Snow, who swings her sword at the creature's neck. Instead of getting herself a Gorgon head, though, Snow is left holding nothing but a now bladeless sword hilt. So much for this crack plan. It's time for Plan B, which amounts to escaping. Along the way, Medusa is able to snatch Snow. Charming manages to free her, but Medusa spins him around and turns him to stone. We flash forward to...
Storybrooke. Snow has arrived at the convent in time to see Emma and David cover Blue's body with a blanket. When Regina and Panry arrive, the Charmings tell them the Shadow killed Blue. By the way, I agree with those fans who believe Panry targeted Blue because she was magical, and his whole aim is to manipulate his way into Regina's vault. Do you think Blue is permanently dead? Do you care?
Regina is confused, since she trapped the Shadow on Hook's sail herself. Emma states the obvious: it got free. Neal is there too, he suggests going to the ship and getting the coconut candleholder not a star-map Shadow trap. Tink and Hook follow him. Regina is still trying to make sense of the magical logistics, which I really appreciate, because, like Gold, that's her expertise. Emma figures the hows don't matter. Panry makes sure to play the Pan can still hurt me card. Charming says Henry isn't safe out in the open. Panry turns to Regina. "You'll protect me, right?" Regina hugs him. "Of course." Emma tells them to go. "We'll take care of the Shadow."
Once Panry starts down the steps, Emma calls Regina back. "Keep a close eye on him. [...] He just doesn't seem quite himself." Regina: "You mean because he asked for me?" Emma stammers that's not what she meant, but Regina is too blinded by Panry's pretense of love, to listen. She figures Emma's just jealous. She points out that she has ten years experience of soothing his fears. Emma insists this isn't about Regina. She just has a gut feeling. Regina suggests she employ that feeling to find the Shadow, "...Instead of obsessing over who's going to comfort our son." I'll still give her a point for remembering to use "our." Regina catches up with Henry and we cut to the...
Cemetery. As they near mausoleum, Regina exposits that this is where she keeps her magic. She leads Panry down the hidden staircase and asks him to promise not to touch anything. Panry's smile is smug. "I promise." Well, so much for him not lying, directly. I mean, he's been lying all along, but with the truth and twists there of. This promise will prove to be a flat out lie. Commercial.
In the Enchanted Past, Snow is horrified that her new groom has turned to stone, but she won't leave him or let Medusa scare her away. Regina appears in the shiny center of a fallen shield and taunts her about how her prince is now a statue. "I can barely tell the difference." Okay, Charming has been awesome this episode, but that was damned funny. Regina is enjoying this immensely, but when Snow says it's all Regina's fault, Regina points out that Snow has destroyed her own happiness. Once Regina's image disappears, Snow catches sight of her reflection in the shield's center and admits she defeated herself. I so know the feeling. That admission then inspires Snow to come up with a solution. She peels the leatherwork off the shield until the entire surface is shiny, lures Medusa to her, and hides behind the shield. When Medusa looks at her own reflection, she turns to stone, and Charming is restored. The lovers kiss and Charming says, "Now I know what Frederick felt like." Nice callback. Snow apologizes for being so focused on Regina that she nearly lost the one thing she could never live without -- Charming. New groom that he is, Charming has a few ideas on how she can make up for that. We flash forward to...
Storybrooke. Emma and her parents find Gold and Belle leaving his shop. He is in no mood for one of their crises, but Emma says they need Pandora's Box. Gold doesn't want to tempt fate and let Pan escape. They explain that somehow Pan is still controlling the Shadow. Gold points out they barely succeeding in catching Pan the first time. Emma's not talking about catching him. "Wouldn't you rather be sure he's gone?" Gold asks what she has in mind. We cut to the...
Town Line. Charming's truck pulls up, first. Gold's Cadillac follows. Emma and Gold bicker about who will perform what function, but Emma wins out when she points out that the lion's share of the work has to be done on the other side of the line, where there is no magic. "With all due respect, the real world is my expertise." Emma crosses the line and says she'll deal with Pan on her terms. Gold points out Pan is his father. Emma says this is her hunch. If she fails, Gold can pick up the pieces.
Gold magically opens the box from the Storybrooke side, and places it outside of the town limit's, where Pan will have no access to magic. Emma stands waiting with her gun drawn. Henry, in Pan's body (Hen) finally appears and has to convince Emma not to shoot him. Hen rattles off facts of his life, but Snow points out Pan could have learned those facts from Henry. Emma recalls her father's earlier pep talk and says life is made up of moments as well as fact. She asks Hen to tell her the first time they connected (not met). Hen smiles and tells her it was when they were on his castle play structure and he admitted he knew she only gave him away to give him his best chance. Mother and son hug, and cross the line after they're sure Gold won't incinerate them. Emma gives Gold the Pandora's Box, while Hen hugs Snow and Charming. Gold apologizes for doubting Hen, and for putting him in the box in the first place. Hen says it's okay and that he probably would have done the same. We cut to...
Regina's Vault. Panry eyes all the potions and hones in on one, then manipulates Regina by telling her he's so lucky she's protecting him. Regina promises that when this is over, she'll be the mother he's always wanted her to be. Regina hugs him, and tells him she loves him. Panry reaches behind her and grabs the potion in question. When he opens the bottle, the mist knocks out Regina. Panry smiles. "I know you do. That's why this was so easy." Evil! Also? Commercial.
After the break, we return to the Enchanted Past. I'm running long, so here's how I covered it in the recaplet: Snow and Charming share a quiet moment. Snow confesses she wants to start a family. Charming feels the same way. Snow realizes she was so focused on defeating Regina, because she didn't want to bring a child into a world filled with such badness. Now Snow knows there will always be problems; they have to find good moments between the bad. This is a reminder I desperately needed, Snow (and Show), so I thank you for that. We flash forward to the...
Storybrooke Cemetery. Belle, Gold, Hen, Emma, Snow, and Charming approach the mausoleum. Neal, Hook, and Tink are already waiting there. Hen runs into Neal's arms. I love how uncomfortable everyone looks when they're hugging and talking to Hen. Since the mausoleum is locked, Gold casts a spell to unlock it, but says it will take a while.
Emma walks off and tries to collect herself. Her parents go to her and assure her it will be okay. Emma can't even use her gun, since Pan is in Henry's body. Charming says they'll save him and lays another pep talk on her. Emma knows he's about to hit the "moments" theme, because she's been paying attention to this episode. Charming and Snow both say that's exactly what it is all about. Emma says they're wrong. The Savior doesn't have the luxury of having moments. She says her magic has a price -- she will never get a day off.
Thank goodness that at that moment, Gold manages to open the door, because I'm about to open a vein on Emma's behalf. Snow, Charming and Emma make it down into the vault, first. When Snow sees Regina lying unconscious, she rushes to her side. This ticks off some fans, but not me. Snow checks for a pulse. Charming reports Pan is gone. Emma calls up to the rest of the team and sounds the all clear.
Gold magically revives Regina, who asks what happened. Emma explains the body swap. Regina can't believe she fell for it. Snow says they all did. Regina chides herself for wanting so badly to believe Henry still wanted her to be his mother. Hen enters the chamber. "I still do." Regina gasps when she sees her son in Pan's form. When he hugs her, she tries not to cry.
Gold's been doing some magical investigating. He holds up his hand and when he feels a charge, he turns to Regina. "Please tell me you didn't keep it down here." Regina looks like a little girl who has to face her disappointed father. "Where else would I keep it?" Emma asks what Pan took. We cut to the...
Woods. As Panry unwinds the scroll, Felix says, "A curse?" Panry corrects him. "No, Felix. The Curse." He explains how it took everyone from the Enchanted Forest and dropped them in Storybrooke. Felix asks if he broke him out of jail to give him an origin story. Panry says he broke Felix out of jail because this spell will give them everything they've always wanted. We cut back to the...
Vault. Regina asks why Pan would want the curse. She already cast it and Emma broke it. Gold says that doesn't mean it can't be re-cast. Addressing Emma, he adds, "And this time, without your parents' true love woven in, even you would be powerless to break it." Charming and Snow don't understand what this means. We cut to the...
Woods. Panry tells Felix, "Everyone will forget who they are. Time will stand still, and Felix, we will be in charge. [...] And when we're done with it, it's going to be the new Neverland." Dear me, I hope there will at least be sunshine. Dun dun dun!
I'll be back with coverage of the midseason finale, "Going Home." In the meantime, please grade the episode up top, and then join us on the boards, where we're hiding that Once Upon A Time book from Panry, because he's already read way too much of it.