Shout-outs to Wing Chun, Glark, Sars, and the rest of the Mighty Big TV gang, just because I feel like it.
The episode opens in Lily's kitchen, where she's pulling lasagna from the oven. Zoe expresses surprise that Lily's cooking during the week. Lily cheerily defends herself and tells Zoe that it's a "special night -- Aunt Judy's coming over for dinner for the first time since --" "Since Rick started living here?" Zoe concludes. "Since Rick started sleeping over occasionally," Lily corrects her. Grace rushes in panicking because she can't find her skis, and she, too, is surprised that Lily's cooking during the week. See where this joke is going? Lily gives one of her patented exasperated eye rolls and asks why Grace needs her skis tonight. Grace duhs, "The ski trip?" and adds that she needs to get the bindings adjusted to fit her new boots. She heads off to search some more as Rick slips through the back door. He asks what smells so good, and Lily tells him it's lasagna. Everybody say it with Rick: "During the week?" Lily gives him a stink-eye, but it's pretty half-hearted. She announces that the person who says anything about her cooking isn't getting any. Zoe smiles at Rick over the bundle of placemats in her arms and informs him that Judy's coming to dinner. Rick is decidedly less enthusiastic about it than Zoe. Judy, on cue, comes flying into the kitchen and ends up being the person to say something about Lily's cooking during the week. Zoe giggles that Judy doesn't get any, but Judy's unfazed, since she's given up dairy and only wants salad anyway. Lily looks absolutely thrilled to have spent hours cooking Judy's favorite dish. On a side note, Judy's gone and spent a lot of time curling her hair into a mass of ringlets. She really shouldn't have. She and Rick give each other a phony kissy-kiss hello. I hate those things and everything they stand for. Grace returns, full of piss, because she still can't find her skis. Lily snarks that they're in the closet, and Grace snarks right back that she looked. Lily heads off to help Grace in her quest, leaving Judy and Rick alone. And uncomfortable.
The two of them stand on either side of the island, Judy smiling at Rick as she tosses the salad, and Rick tossing some little yellow vegetable-y things into the salad. Without washing them first. Judy continues smiling sweetly as she systematically tosses out every last yellow thing. They're some tiny vegetable I've never seen before -- kind of like a small, squash-shaped yellow tomatoes. Damn, I'd throw those out of my salad, too. They look like a genetics experiment gone awry. Anyway, Rick obviously notices the rejection of his contribution, but he just bites his tongue, takes a deep breath, and says, "So? No dairy, huh?" Judy tells him she learned that she's allergic, and proceeds to lecture him on the downsides of dairy, informing him of all its nasty effects on humans. She concludes, "And we're giving all this milk to children? I mean, they're human, not little cows." Rick forces a laugh, and his Soliloquy Self pops up to say, "She is so...out there!" He says it distastefully. In-colour Rick jokes that he thinks he's allergic to half his life. Judy smiles and asks which half. He says he wishes he knew. She fakes a wide smile and goes back to tossing the salad as Soliloquy Judy says, "He's so...contained!" She says it distastefully. Do you think maybe these two don't really like each other?
Lily returns just in time to save the last little bit of enamel left on Judy's and Rick's teeth. She remembers that she's been meaning to ask for Judy's help finding "a place for the weeding." "Already?" Judy asks. Lily informs her that the wedding's only five weeks away. Five weeks? Good luck "finding a place" that doesn't have Chuck, E., or Cheese in its name. And, five weeks? Is there a shotgun somewhere in this equation? Because that's the only explanation I can imagine for the big rush to the altar. The ink on Lily's divorce papers (which we can only assume exist) isn't even dry yet. Lily doesn't seem to care, though, as she excitedly squeezes Rick and they giggle, while Judy glances uncomfortably from them to the salad. Lily says that she and Judy can look at a couple of places, narrow it down, and then take Rick to look at the finalists. Judy teases that Rick's time must be valuable, implying that hers isn't. Lily says that Judy is just so good at these things. Sure, always a bridesmaid...you pick up things. Judy hedges that she'd love to, but she's really busy these days. Lily says they'll work around Judy's schedule. Judy smiles faintly, sinking. Rick ooohs and asks if Judy remembered to get "that number from [her] friend." He's referring to a photographer Judy knows. Judy waffles, saying she's "not sure he does weddings; he's more of...uh...an artist." Lily and Rick look disappointed while Judy looks guilty and sprinkles something on the salad. Rick's cell phone rings, and he springs to answer it. Judy mutters that she's never seen him without "that phone." "What?" Lily asks, when she really means "pardon." Judy just smiles and waves it away.
Cut to Judy and Grace snuggling on Grace's bed and flipping through catalogs of books. Lily and Rick pop into the doorway so Rick that can say goodbye, because he's been called away by Miles. Rick asks what Grace and Judy are doing, and Grace explains that Judy's helping her with the book fair to raise money for the school's teams. Rick eagerly says that Grace should ask Jessie to help, and then says goodnight, but gets in a parting tease, asking Judy if there are any other food groups he should be worried about. She smiles and says she'll let him know. He pops back to say, "Oh, and don't forget!" Judy's already forgotten. "The photographer," Rick reminds her. Yeah, yeah, she'll get to it. Rick and Lily smooch and he's off. Lily wanders in to join them on Grace's bed, muttering, "That project is so hard on him." Without looking up from her catalog, Grace mutters, "Well, no one's making him do it." Lily chastises Grace for pointing out the obvious, and Judy says, "Well, you're very supportive." Lily takes it as an insult, and asks why she shouldn't be. Judy clarifies that she's not criticizing, and that Lily should be supportive. Judy adds that when she's criticizing, Lily will know it. She smiles and goes back to her catalog.
Cut to the girls' locker room. The camera pans across rows of lockers and benches, with girls in various states of undress. The camera finally settles on Jessie, who's sitting on a bench pulling off her running shoes. Grace rushes down the aisle and hops on the bench behind Jessie. She smiles and seems genuinely friendly as she asks whether Jessie would like to help with the book fair. Jessie says sure, and Grace rhymes off the work schedule to get it organized. Jessie's eyes glaze and she seems to zone out for a few seconds, like she's having trouble focusing on what Grace is saying. She catches herself, squeezes her eyes shut for a second, and then says she "can do that." Grace asks if she's okay. Jessie says she is, and repeats, "Monday and Wednesday? I'll be there." Grace says, "Great!" and takes off up the aisle again, running past some chick she seems to know who's standing there in her underwear. The camera hangs on the panty queen far longer than it needs to. Seriously, I know the show's a little pinched for ratings, but please. I'm pretty sure fourteen-year-old boys are not really its target demographic.