In Deangelo's absence, Jo has appointed Dwight acting manager. That's only because Jim turned her down, but still, the damage is done. In just one short week, he finds plenty of new ways to make everyone miserable, although there are some nice Jim vs. Dwight moments that evoke the old days when this show was still consistently funny. Things go badly enough, but then Dwight decides to go literal gunslinger, and accidentally fires a vintage revolver, perforating the carpet and half-deafening Andy. The good news is that with Jo coming for a visit, the staff now has something to hold over Dwight's head to get what they want. Which, in Jim's case, consists entirely of embarrassing Dwight.
As Andy and Erin hang out in the office more, Gabe is becoming increasingly unglued, having a meltdown in front of Andy to prevail upon him to promise never to date Erin again. And his attempt to bust Andy on it in front of Erin later doesn't exactly backfire, but it doesn't work, either.
Jo's visit goes fine, but then Dwight decides to come clean rather than submit to the blackmail. Any hope he might have had that Jo would be impressed by his confession is dashed when she immediately strips him of the job, forever and ever. Now she has to find a new manager, which will explain the Snake River Canyon jump of stuntcasting coming up for week's finale. When it probably would have been funnier to just leave the new interim manager in place, determined by seniority. Yes, that would be Creed.
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The party planning committee, plus Jim and Dwight, are sitting around in the conference room without a table discussing what to get their comatose boss for a gift. Dwight pushes for a survival-basket in case he wakes up after the apocalypse, but is outvoted. So how are things going without a manager? Jim THs, "Unless you're a young child or a prison inmate, you don't need anyone supervising you. People just come in and do their work on their schedule." Most people do look pretty busy, aside from Andy and Ryan playing foosball in the vacant manager's office. "Must be because the stakes are so high," Jim snarks.
In fact, Jim has just gotten off the phone with Jo, having declined an offer to take over as acting manager. "I don't want to mess this up," he explains to Pam. "There's a consensus. People are happy." Just then Dwight's phone rings, and even Jim knows what that means. "Yes, I would," he says. "Thank you." With all appropriate drama, Dwight moves to take over the manager's office. "What have you done?" Pam murmurs to Jim in horror. From the manager's desk, Dwight calls Mose and says, "You'll never guess where I am right now." Mose, over the phone: "AAAAAAAHHH!!"
Well, Dwight does have top billing in the interim credits, after all, and at the end, he reaches out and adjusts a little shogun figure on his desk, where the Deangelo's southwestern figure used to live, and Michael's Dundie before that. Can't wait to see what's there in week's credits.
Pam gets out of the car in the parking lot, but Jim can't bring himself to follow. In a TH in the parking lot, Jim tells us Dwight has been acting manager for three months... no, a week. There's a time clock they have to punch, oversized business cards that list all their titles as "Junior Employee," and staggered lunch breaks, with Jim's at 10:30. "Stop stalling," Pam tells him. Jim staggers toward the door.
They're also doing the pledge of allegiance every morning, although Oscar pointedly skips the "under God." During the morning announcements, Dwight tells them to stop sharing copier codes with each other, and mentions an impending visit from Jo later today, so no fomenting insurrection. Jim briefly succeeds in sidetracking him with questions about fomenting, but it's a small victory.
Dwight busts Kelly coming in late, and quickly makes it weird and inappropriate, so that helped make up for lost time.
Gabe sees Andy chatting with Erin at Reception, and hauls him into the conference room, shutting the door and closing the shades so we can only see their faces through narrow cracks. Anyway, Gabe's point, which he makes tearfully, is that he needs to get Erin back because he can't be alone any more. "Do you like being alone with me right now?" "No, this is horrifying," Andy admits. Gabe gets him to promise that they'll never date again, and after a minute so "no one will know" he was crying, emerges from the room with a frozen rictus of a death-grin that's even worse than his normal smile.
Jim tacks up a poster with a pictured of a fist and the slogan "JOIN THE FIST" on it. And that's all it says. Dwight busts him, and figures Jim just wants him to think he's starting a rebellion, but Jim says it's just a club, although he exchanges raised fists with a passing (and confused) Darryl. Dwight says he wants to join, but Jim puts him off because today is Operation Overthrow. "But I have noted it." As soon as Jim leaves, Dwight takes down the flyer and throws it in the trash. And the moment Dwight's gone, Jim tacks up two more.
Life under Dwight: Kevin is tying to enter his 21-digit copier code, with a line backed up behind him. In the kitchen, Stanley scoffs at the "HONOR SYSTEM 50¢ sign to a surveillance camera. Andy tries to show Pam a video online, and gets a "blocked" message that's a lot more friendly-looking and a lot less accusatory than the ones I've been seeing in corporate America for the last decade. Dwight just watches them from his office. From behind his giant "DWIGHT K SCHRUTE INTERIM MANAGER" desk nameplate, Dwight says he'll never be happier than he is right now. "I will also never be less happy. I will be at my current maximum happiness for the rest of my life. Because I am the manager of the Scranton branch of Dunder-Mifflin. Acting Manager." Hard to see how things could change.
All the food in the vending machines has been replaced by ads for "Dwight's Caffeine Corner." Creed says he's got it covered, with snacks in the freezer. "You mean the frozen mice for the piranha?" Pam asks. Creed says, "No, the blueberry Slurpee pouch." "He means the ice pack," Phyllis explains. One wonders how many of those Creed has sucked down over the years.
Gabe hangs up Erin's phone while she's in the middle of a call to declare his love, but gets caught up in the stuff he doesn't believe in, like God, until he does again. Alas, that detour wasted the precious seconds before her phone started ringing again, and Gabe asks, "Do we not have voice mail?" Erin explains, "Dwight doesn't trust robots to give us our messages." Gabe is thrown. In Erin's TH, she says she's on a break from dating. "Gabe was a great guy with so many wonderful qualities, but it was a challenge being touched by him."
"Wow, you've really embraced the Bond villain aesthetic," Jim remarks in Dwight's office. There's an old gun in a desktop display case, the aforementioned piranha in a tank, and a new desk that's a solid block of marble, a replica of Uday Hussein's. Dwight asks Jim to promise to be on his best behavior during Jo's visit, but Jim says he already promised other people he'd be on his worst. Dwight threatens to fire him, which Jim says Dwight can't do. "Don't make me pre-fire you," Dwight tries again. "You wouldn't dare!" Jim gasps. But Dwight pre-fires him anyway, promising to full-fire him after Dwight's promotion. "If you get promoted," Jim says, dead serious. "And if you haven't fallen in love with me by then." Jim THs that if he thought Dwight might ever become the permanent manager, he'd pre-quit. We might think that's pre-premature, but Jim says it's best to be pre-pre-pre-prepared.
Dwight gets distracted from trying to find out from Jordan what people say about him (after preemptively returning the favor, rather meanly), but crumples in joy upon finding what's in the box he's opening: a holster. I think we all know what's coming .
So now Dwight is out in the bullpen, full-on gunslinger, showing off the holster with the gun in it. Eventually it gets some attention, and almost universal protests. Dwight argues that he can't just wear the holster (a gift from his uncle Honk) without a gun, and when Pam protests that he doesn't need to wear the holster at all, he shoots back, "Why do you need to wear those boobie-shirts all the time?" "Thank you," puts in Angela, who is dressed almost exactly like Pam. Phyllis suggests he put his cell phone in it instead, and Kevin a banana, and Pam simply puts her foot down, threatening to call Jo. Dwight gives in, pulls the gun out, and twirls it. It goes off right to Andy, causing him to scream. Erin is at his side faster than the bullet, asking if he's okay. "That's so loud!" Andy wails.
After the ads, Oscar looks at the bullet-hole in the floor in shock. "There is a hardwood floor underneath this carpeting. Why would they do that?" Andy seems to be trying to pitch-match the ringing in his ears. Meredith starts making a list for insurance fraud, and Dwight hands the gun off to an all-too-willing Creed as Toby comes in asking what happened. Fortunately, Kelly is there to bear witness: "Dwight went on a shooting spree and then he shot Andy in the head." Dwight is already trying to weasel out of this, pointing out that nobody actually saw a bullet leave a gun. Andy's still worried, and Oscar tires to get on WebMD (getting mocked by Angela), and finds it blocked. Jo is unreachable, probably already on the plane, and Andy wants to go to the hospital. Erin offers to go with him, and Gabe's roar of "No!" is louder than the gunshot, although he claims it's because they need a receptionist, "Now more than ever." Darryl steps up, and Andy starts draping himself over him until Darryl reminds him he can probably walk normally. Toby's at least excited that he gets to finally use the gun-violence form in the accident report binder. Gabe's still trying to reach Jo, and Dwight calls a meeting in the conference room, right now.
Once everyone's assembled, Dwight leaps in wearing a cowboy hat and trying to be a character called "Gun Safety Dwight." He's obviously asked himself WWMD (what would Michael do?) but can't pull it off for more than a few seconds. He claims to be launching an investigation, downplaying the fact that everyone else saw it. Again, he tries to pull a Michael by sucking up to them: "Managing you for this last week has been the greatest honor of my life. And if you ruin this, I will burn this office to the ground. And I mean that figuratively, not literally. Because you guys are so, so important to me. I love you guys, but don't cross me, but you're the best!"
Andy and Darryl return, and Andy breaks the news that he has a burst eardrum that could take weeks to heal. "Did they say what caused it?" Dwight asks solicitously. "Because I know you like putting Q-tips deep into your ear canal." Andy says it's temporary deafness in one ear, which is at least better than both, like it was in the waiting room. Darryl confesses that he was just moving his lips without making any sound. "I don't feel good about it, but he just kept calling himself a gunshot victim and it got to me." Kelly picks this moment to ask for tomorrow off for an American Idol audition, and when Dwight says no, offers to sing her solo right here, which is about her temporary boss going on a shooting spree. Dwight changes his mind in a hurry. So Phyllis wants an extra vacation day, Angela wants pet day back ("no dogs"), Kevin wants the vending machine restocked, "except the fruit," and Pam wants all of Dwight's weapons gone, including the killer fish. Dwight looks at Jim, who only wants Dwight to say "shagadelic" to Jo at least three times, and do jazz hands whenever Jim coughs.
Later, Dwight emerges from the bathroom with an empty fish tank. Kevin enters a moment late and comes out en déshabille, saying, "What the fuck is that?"
Enter Jo, with two entirely different dogs from her dogs, which she lets loose in the office. "Nobody let my dogs hump each other, they don't seem to know they're brothers," she announces. Dwight tries to rush her into his office, but she wants to do other stuff, like greet Jim as the only man who ever turned her down. Jim says that Dwight is "firing on all cylinders," and Jo gets serious about the tragic fate of Deangelo. Which is when Jim coughs, cueing the jazz hands from Dwight.
Gabe finds Andy and Erin laughing in the kitchen, and says, "Hey, Andy, did you tell Erin about our conversation earlier when you said you'd never want to date her again? I just thought it was so interesting that you promised that." Andy is flummoxed briefly, as Erin looks curiously back and forth between them, but he eventually rallies and says his "maternal instincts kicked in." As to whether he actually feels that way, "Yes or no. That is between me and my diary." He leaves them to it, and Erin exits the other way like this literally the least interesting conversation she's ever heard. But only because she's usually so interested in everything.
Dwight asks Oscar for a sales printout, and Kevin demands a back massage from Dwight. Dwight tries to put him off until Kevin threatens to call Jo over, and he ends up wedging both his feet against the file cabinet to push hard enough for Kevin. He jumps down from this energetic shoulder-fucking when Jo comes out, saying they'll talk soon. "You gotta admit it, it's nice to have a little power, eh?" she whispers to him. "How's it feel?" Dwight clenches his jaw and loudly says, "Jo, I accidentally fired a gun in the office today. I am telling you this because I care too much about this job to be blackmailed into doing it poorly." The entire office is transfixed, and it looks like Dwight may actually have turned this thing around. Jim may have only seconds left to pre-quit. Dwight continues, "All I ever wanted is to be manager here, and if you feel like you cannot promote me over this one accident, I understand. But if you feel that extortion is worse--" "Shooting is worse, are you kiddin' me?" Jo interrupts. Dwight goes back to weaseling, but Jo isn't having it. "I love you, Dwight, but you don't fit this job. Now I gotta find a replacement for my replacement." Jim looks like he actually feels bad for Dwight, who sinks down on the reception coffee table. That was one hell of a revelation. Jo loves Dwight?
Jo appoints Jim, Toby, and Gabe as her search committee to find the manager. In the meantime, they need another acting manager, and asks who has the most experience. The search committee exchanges long, searching looks.
Before anyone answers, we cut to Jim returning to his desk, to where Dwight is moving his stuff back in. He asks how it's going, and is told to shut up. Jim says Jo was right, which Dwight knows, but Jim adds, "I will say, in your one week, every single one of the orders went out in time, and I think that is shagadelic, baby." And in the background, the new interim manager, the person who's been at Dunder Mifflin-Scranton longer than anyone, settles in contentedly behind the replica of Uday Hussein's desk. Yes, it's Creed. Too bad Uday Hussein wasn't available.
And the tag is about all the people and man-hours it took to help Kevin get his 21-digit copier code entered into the machine just once.
M. Giant is a Minneapolis-based writer with a wife, a son, and a number of cats that seems to have settled at around two. Learn waaaay too much about him at Velcrometer, follow him on Twitter , or just e-mail him at m.giant[at]gmail.com.