By Jacob
In a hurry? Read the recaplet for a nutshell description! Finished? Click here to close.Jackie's now a week clean, and finding reality not-so-awesome. Grace wants to go on pediatric Xanax, which sounds like a great plan -- since she's, you know, nuts -- except for how her mom is a huge drug addict, and this is a shortcut to getting there. Jackie takes it pretty hard, and Eleanor and Eddie commiserate with her about this latest thing; eventually Eleanor gets it taken care of.
The HR situation escalates; Jackie can't administer meds for some reason having to do with Gloria wanting to do damage control. Jackie is totally ashamed, which is nice to see, but probably won't last; it only takes about three seconds for her to figure out Eleanor was the one who told Gloria about her drug issues.
Zoey and Thor -- who's gotten his braces off! -- spend the day abusing the hospital's doctors in the name of flu shots, but it's a serious reprimand from O'Hara that breaks Zoey's brain for good. She starts flirting with this monkey-obsessed do-gooder who's pretty cute, in a fivehead way, but is no Lenny, and then Lenny gets involved and they sort of fight.
Everybody feels bad for Eleanor -- because fighting with Jackie is so harsh for a person to deal with -- but there's only so much you can do. Eleanor eventually takes her down for it, and Jackie continues crying and being embarrassed. Later, Gloria assures Eleanor she wasn't to blame, and Grace indulges in weirdness on a whole new level while waiting for her drugs to kick in, so Jackie's somehow found her level after all.
Akalitus engages Coop's services as a hostage negotiator to get her statues back; he's into it because he wants the chapel for his birthday-slash-wedding. Eleanor talks Coop into hitting on her, and it's super funny but also pretty random; mostly it just seems like an amazing story for her to tell Jackie later, which makes it awesome.
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Want more? The full recap starts right below!The good news is, Grace is in therapy, where she belongs all day every day. The bad news is, the lady's got her doing a dream journal which, unicornish cover aside, you know has got to be the biggest piece of literary snuff since the Revelation of Saint John. Bunnies and kittens spontaneously combusting, saints stabbing each other all to hell, mommies getting electrocuted, the whole thing.
FAMILY SESSION
Therapist: "Wait until you hear this shit, guys."
Grace: "Basically, I can control the weather. I think bad things, and then they happen."
Kevin: "For real? Like, Into The Cornfield-type stuff?"
Grace: "No, just in theory. Not so much that it happens as that it might."
Jackie: "So, nothing is actually happening that affects me? You're just nuts? Honey, she's just nuts."
Grace: "Yeah but like the degree."
Therapist: "She needs to be on drugs. Uncrazy-making drugs. All of them."
Grace: "Better living through chemistry."
Therapist: "The great thing about Xanax is that she can use it whenever she wants. This totally addictive drug, she can just pop a pill whenever she feels like it. Doesn't that sound like a great fucking idea?"
Jackie: "As a huge drug addict, I see the attraction. But I can't help thinking this is all about me."
Grace: "For once, you are totally right."
Therapist: "Where there's smoke, there's fire. Any particular reason why your daughter might be going even more insane than baseline?"
Kevin: "Certainly not that I can think of. Although I should mention that, just like every episode this whole season, I'm going to be disappearing for large amounts of time with zero explanation."
Jackie: "I am detoxing right now -- through no conscious or dignified action of my own -- so mostly what I can think about today is itching."
Grace: "Honestly, the fact that I eat my own hair bald sort of makes me a trooper when you consider these mothers."
ALL SAINTS PHARMACY
Jackie: "Eddie, can you fill this Xanax Rx for my insane daughter?"
Eddie: "No, but I can't tell you why. Is everything okay?"
Jackie: "Itching."
Eddie: "Do you think Grace understands the ramifications of drug use?"
Jackie: "I think Grace pretty much defines the 'ramifications of drug use.'"
Eddie: "You feel pretty shitty about this, yes?"
Jackie: "I had no idea my worst nightmare involved somebody else in pain. I kind of thought it was a world with no drugs in it for me to take. But no, this is worse."