By Pablo G
In a hurry? Read the recaplet for a nutshell description! Finished? Click here to close.What's the best way to bring all your characters together into one big, hot mess? Pool party! See, Jonah has always had this plan to throw the bitchinest pool party when he made his first screenplay sale, and that's just what he does at The Complex Pool. This is where we lay our scene tonight.
Amanda is still trying everything she can to find that damn painting. Pretty soon she's going to begin ordering from the ACME catalogue. Her plan tonight is to get everyone super drunk at Jonah's party in hopes she'll have an easier time mining for information about the painting's whereabouts. Hey, if you get me drunk for free, I'll tell you where you can find all sorts of paintings. Amanda's investigation turns up nothing, yet again, but she has a lead from David that Sydney gave one final painting to Auggie before her death. To make matters worse, someone is stealing money from WPK!
Ella finds that some of her recent accounts like Jasper Barnes and Jo Reynolds have thousands of dollars unaccounted for. There's no evidence against anyone besides Amanda and herself. That's ain't good. Ella overhears a conversation at the party between Amanda and Jo about Amanda's history of stealing money from her own companies. Jo extorts some charity money from Amanda there on the spot. Later, Amanda tries to straight-up accuse Ella of being the embezzler, but Ella stands up for herself. Amanda just leaves her with the vague ultimatum that she needs to "work hard to make amends." Is this going the Lauren route?
Speaking of Lauren, Dr. Mancini is still blackmailing her, but now he wants to get in on some of that sweet hooker sex in addition to breaking her and David up. Putting up with this and David's moping around, asking why she dumped him, prompts Lauren to say enough. In front of all of her friends at the party, she confesses her secret hooker double life in favor of having to sleep with Michael. David is disgusted, but it's mostly about Lauren's ability to lie to him for so long and so well. After freeing herself of Michael's blackmail, Lauren tries to declare her love for David, but it falls on mostly deaf ears. Everyone else is just like, "Damn... She was a hooker?"
Things between Riley and Drew begin to heat up. He invites her to go with him toy shopping for the pediatric ward and quickly woos her before they make it back to Jonah's party. There's obviously some unhealthy competition going on between Jonah and Riley as they enjoy their new playmates, which comes to a head after a heated beer pong match between Jonah and Drew. Jonah wins and gloats by making out with Ella in front of everyone. Riley and Drew leave to go make out in her apartment, but Jonah catches them when he unassumingly (and trespassingly) goes into Riley's apartment in search of a bottle opener. Later, Drew and Jonah try to talk it out, but end up brawling instead in The Complex Pool. How 1993 of them. Jonah apologizes to Riley the day, but Riley is all hard feelings after having to watch Jonah and Ella nest for the last couple weeks. For the first time ever, I agree with you, Riles. Kill me now.
-- Pablo G. is some guy who lives in San Antonio, Texas. Check him out at Space Monkeys!, Obscure Sports Reference, and follow him @PendejoJoe on Twitter.
Want more? The full recap starts right below!We begin tonight's episode with a haze covering The Complex Pool. No, there hasn't been another murder -- though, at this point that might be welcome. Jonah stands triumphantly behind the fog in a fedora and a t-shirt that reads "chinchillin'" with a chinchilla with sunglasses on it. Yup. Makes total sense Ella wants this guy. David comes out to see what the deal is and Jonah explains he has a state-of-the-art fog machine for this amazing party he plans to throw tonight in celebration of selling his screenplay. Wait... didn't they celebrate this that one night by getting drunk, sans Riley? Ella walks into the courtyard looking particularly... flat. I'm sure it's the cameraman's fault. Either way, Ella seems concerned Jonah is already blowing through his money, but Jonah's mind is made up. And we all know once Jonah makes up his mind, it's final. Really, Jonah's just excited about being able to throw an awesome party for his friends who believed in him all along. David asks Ella if Lauren has indicated any reason for their breakup. No luck.
Riley types away at her laptop in the Former Lovenest as Lauren comes up behind her to admire how hard she's working. Lauren has a day off so Riles wants to go shopping. Laur is in awe of how Riley has so much energy and can accomplish so much after what she's been through. Riles isn't hearing all that, she'd much rather find out some more about Lauren's break-up, but before Lauren can open her mouth, Drew shows up with a basket of Riley's forgotten laundry, embarrassingly including underwear. Lauren gets a call from Michael to go in for work, meaning she can't go shopping. Drew takes the fallen-through plans as an opportunity to ask Riley out toy shopping. That's the way to do it, Drew. Make them think you're a pedophile so they'll be pleasantly surprised when you're not one. You're not one, right? Drew says the toys are for the pediatric ward. Good cover story, Drew! Riles declines the invite. Damn! Drew puts on a guilt trip about probably buying lead toys without Riley's help. Lauren gives Riles a nod, urging her to accept the invite. She agrees. The pedophile fake-out tactic works yet again!
Hey, it's Jane! How ya been, Jane? She walks with Amanda into her penthouse. Amanda seems irritated by the visit and Jane seems offended by the lack of hospitality. Can't we all just get along, ladies? Amanda feels no obligation to be grateful for the apartment Jane scored her since she still had to give a security deposit and was only granted the penthouse on the condition she fire Ella. Wait, what?! Jane's apparently still quite pissed about Ella screwing her over at her big fashion opening. Amanda just says these things take time and basically kicks Jane out. "Not everyone can spend their day playing dress-up with mannequins." Burn.