No Good Deed Goes Unsexed

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Manolo the Spanish-from-Spain nurse brings Pete's mother by the office, and Peggy chats with her only to find she's mistaken her for Trudy – and that she's getting some action. When Pete learns that his mom is apparently banging the nurse, he tells her he's going to let him go, to which she tells Pete that he's always been unlovable. Pete calls Benson in to chew him out for his recommendation, but Benson tells him that Manolo isn't in love with his mother – because, apparently, he's into dudes, and so is Benson. Sadly, Benson's in love with Pete, who is not quite ready to return the sentiment. None of that matters, though, because I was right about the shorts. Also, Pete, Peggy, and Ted go out and get sloppy after an Ocean Spray meeting, and Pete clues in that Peggy and Ted have the mutual hots for each other, not that he disapproves. When Ted sees the rapport Pete and Peggy have, not knowing it's borne of their history together, he seems jealous; not only that, his wife tells him he's too focused on work even when he's not in the office. In the end, though, Ted seems to make the choice to stay with what he's got, which likely means Peggy's going to give Stan an even harder sell the time she has a rat problem, which will probably be tomorrow.

Mitchell, Sylvia and Arnold's son, is in the apartment when Don comes home, and Megan tells Don the kid sent back his draft card in protest and now wants to run to Canada to avoid possible prison time. Don tells her from experience that the kid can't spend his life on the run, but soon a fit-to-be-tied Arnold shows up at their door, and he and Don go out for a drink, whereupon Don reiterates the sentiment we've heard from him before that he's against the war. Feeling a sympathy for the kid he probably didn't know he was capable of, Don goes to Pete and asks him to get hold of his old DoD friend (the one that buried the investigation into Don's past when they were courting -- I think -- Northrop Grumman) to see if he can get Mitchell a deferment. Pete suggests Don turn to GM, but when Don feels them out at a dinner, the reaction is frosty, to say the least. Ted initially chews Don out for this, but when he hears the problem, he offers to make a call to a highly-place military officer to get the kid into a pilot program – in exchange for Don working with him in the future. Don sincerely agrees, and then calls a grateful and tearful Sylvia, which is a much better ending to their relationship than anything we saw before. Or it would be, except when Sally sneaks into Sylvia's place to try to retrieve a letter her friend Julie left for Mitchell on her behalf, she catches Don and Sylvia in flagrante and runs off in horror. Later, it's a Dinner O'Awkward, as a drunken Don barely is home for five minutes before Rosen and Mitchell show up to thank him in front of a nauseated Sally. Don lies to her about what she saw, and she tells him she believes it, but her fatherly worship looks like it's gone for good. ABOUT TIME.

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So Peggy is still living in the now Abe-less building she owns, and she's dressed and ready to head to work when she sees a rat scurry by. She does scream, but instead of getting up on a table as the cartoons of my youth led me to believe, she heads right out the door. How disappointingly sensible of her.

Dawn greets Don by taking his briefcase and informing him that Roger's in his office. From inside, they hear what sounds like glasses being knocked over, after which Dawn hilariously turns back to Don: "Do you want ice?" Don tells her that coffee will do before heading in and seeing Roger rummaging for something on the floor. Don snarks that being near the bar is one thing, but being under it is quite another; however, Roger is not fishing for dropped olives or cocktail glasses -- Sunkist sent over a crate of oranges, and he was just picking up the three with which he was trying to juggle. He remarks that he's seen blind people do it, but it seems to be beyond him, earning this response from Don: "Why don't you just close your eyes? That's what you did in the meeting." Good line, but at this point it amazes me that Don (or Roger, for that matter) feels qualified to assess anyone else's behavior as unprofessional. It's almost, but probably not quite, as bad as if Betty were to judge anyone else's parenting.

Anyway, it's a moot point, as Sunkist wants them. While Don is glad to hear it, he points out that the best advertising angle will be to show the oranges on TV, "but they were pretty clear they're too cheap to get out of print." Roger suggests Don talk them into it, but Don tells him the best way to do that will be through a media strategy, not market research. He suggests Roger get Harry on it before tossing an orange back at Roger, who starts juggling like a circus performer. And while I compliment the achievement, I find it hard to believe anyone as attention-starved as Roger wouldn't have had this in his arsenal already.

Oh look, it's Dot -- dressed in a Jackie O suit right down to the pink color, with a Spanish man who can only be her nurse, Manolo. Clara leads them up the stairs and tells them Pete should be right with them, and after Manolo requests a cup of tea for his charge, the door opens and Peggy emerges, a poster board with an Ocean Spray ad ("Berry Good" is the tagline, which makes me wonder if this is a first draft) under her arm. Pete, behind her, makes a disparaging comment about having to take Ted's plane to present. Seeing his mother, Pete greets her warmly enough before asking Manolo if he could have a word, and the fairly-heavily-accented Manolo agrees, leaving Peggy to sit down with Dot. Dot tells Peggy that she's glad she and Pete both swallowed their pride and reunited "for the good of the child you have together," and given that Peggy still ostensibly doesn't know about Pete and Trudy's estrangement, it's hard to blame her face for doing some things she probably didn't know it was capable of before she chokes out an "Excuse me?" However, after Peggy tells Dot that she and Pete aren't together "that way." Dot urges "Trudy" not to deny him ("don't reject his caresses" is not a line I necessarily needed to hear), and Peggy breathes a sigh of relief, but doesn't have time really to take in what that means about Pete and Trudy's marriage -- because Dot goes right on to say that she hopes they "can someday find what Manolo and I have found." Peggy's like, "...," and Dot goes on that she "waited long enough to experience the physical satisfactions of love," which I guess is not the greatest testimonial to Pete's dad's prowess, not that that's a huge surprise. Peggy forces a brittle smile before hilariously asking out loud if Clara went to China for the tea, and it does seem to be taking a while, but I wonder if she's not surreptitiously watching and giggling.

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Manolo the Spanish-from-Spain nurse brings Pete's mother by the office, and Peggy chats with her only to find she's mistaken her for Trudy – and that she's getting some action. When Pete learns that his mom is apparently banging the nurse, he tells her he's going to let him go, to which she tells Pete that he's always been unlovable. Pete calls Benson in to chew him out for his recommendation, but Benson tells him that Manolo isn't in love with his mother – because, apparently, he's into dudes, and so is Benson. Sadly, Benson's in love with Pete, who is not quite ready to return the sentiment. None of that matters, though, because I was right about the shorts. Also, Pete, Peggy, and Ted go out and get sloppy after an Ocean Spray meeting, and Pete clues in that Peggy and Ted have the mutual hots for each other, not that he disapproves. When Ted sees the rapport Pete and Peggy have, not knowing it's borne of their history together, he seems jealous; not only that, his wife tells him he's too focused on work even when he's not in the office. In the end, though, Ted seems to make the choice to stay with what he's got, which likely means Peggy's going to give Stan an even harder sell the time she has a rat problem, which will probably be tomorrow.

Mitchell, Sylvia and Arnold's son, is in the apartment when Don comes home, and Megan tells Don the kid sent back his draft card in protest and now wants to run to Canada to avoid possible prison time. Don tells her from experience that the kid can't spend his life on the run, but soon a fit-to-be-tied Arnold shows up at their door, and he and Don go out for a drink, whereupon Don reiterates the sentiment we've heard from him before that he's against the war. Feeling a sympathy for the kid he probably didn't know he was capable of, Don goes to Pete and asks him to get hold of his old DoD friend (the one that buried the investigation into Don's past when they were courting -- I think -- Northrop Grumman) to see if he can get Mitchell a deferment. Pete suggests Don turn to GM, but when Don feels them out at a dinner, the reaction is frosty, to say the least. Ted initially chews Don out for this, but when he hears the problem, he offers to make a call to a highly-place military officer to get the kid into a pilot program – in exchange for Don working with him in the future. Don sincerely agrees, and then calls a grateful and tearful Sylvia, which is a much better ending to their relationship than anything we saw before. Or it would be, except when Sally sneaks into Sylvia's place to try to retrieve a letter her friend Julie left for Mitchell on her behalf, she catches Don and Sylvia in flagrante and runs off in horror. Later, it's a Dinner O'Awkward, as a drunken Don barely is home for five minutes before Rosen and Mitchell show up to thank him in front of a nauseated Sally. Don lies to her about what she saw, and she tells him she believes it, but her fatherly worship looks like it's gone for good. ABOUT TIME.

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Inside, Pete pays Manolo for a little extra time and tells him Benson was right about him, and Manolo agrees that Benson "is a wonderful salesman." Mm-hmm. Pete even gives Manolo a cash tip off the books and Manolo tries to refuse as the work is enough of a reward, but Pete insists. Manolo bows respectfully and withdraws, and while it's all very businesslike and straightforward, I wonder how Pete is going to remember it later.

Betty gets off the phone and calls for Sally in that someone's-in-trouble tone of hers right before Henry's voice announces that he's home. Sally enters the kitchen with attitude to match her mother's, as usual, and when Betty tells her that "Julie's" mom called to inform her she and Sally are the only girls going on an upcoming trip, Sally wonders what the problem is. Betty, however, forbids her from staying in a Midtown hotel "with all those boys," the presence of twenty-five-year-old "Miss O'Shea" notwithstanding. Henry enters and irritably wonders why they have a mansion if everyone's always going to be in the kitchen, and I hope this isn't leading to another role-play situation with Sally still in the room. She's going to be scarred plenty soon enough. Sally tells Betty fine, then -- she won't do Model UN, which by the way was Henry's idea, but Betty still won't give. Sally asks if she and Julie can't stay with Don, which gets a "You mean with no one," so I guess Betty wasn't kidding when she told Don she wasn't changing her life just because they slept together. Sally shoots back that at least Don supports her dreams and "he doesn't think I'm just a pain in the ass!" It's a classic play, pitting one parent against the other, but if I were Betty I'd go for a simple Lisa Simpson-esque "What are you basing that on?" Instead, Betty barks that Don's a real hero before snitting to Henry that diplomacy club is just an excuse to make out. If that were true, I'd think it'd be a lot more popular.

Don arrives home to find Megan sitting on the couch with a long-haired boy in his late teens, whom she introduces as Sylvia and Arnold's oft-mentioned, but never-before-seen son Mitchell. Don stretches out a hand, but the kid doesn't even make eye contact to accompany his cursory shake before thanking Megan and leaving via the back door. Don, you might want to take note of how many people know that trick. When he's gone, Megan sighs uncertainly and says that she's sworn to secrecy, but Mitchell's in a lot of trouble -- he's 1-A. Don points out that the kid is in school, but Megan tells him Mitchell sent back his draft card in protest and he got reclassified as a result. She goes on that Mitchell's thinking of running to Canada, which is why he was there as she could call her brother-in-law to help him out of the country, "but I can't do that to Sylvia and Arnold." Don counsels her to leave it alone, and when she protests that he's so scared, he snaps that he should be, but then softens a bit to speak from experience: "He can't spend the rest of his life on the run." Megan sees his point, but still doesn't want him to go to Vietnam. Don flatly tells her it's not their problem. No need for ice in the drink you're fixing, Don.

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Manolo the Spanish-from-Spain nurse brings Pete's mother by the office, and Peggy chats with her only to find she's mistaken her for Trudy – and that she's getting some action. When Pete learns that his mom is apparently banging the nurse, he tells her he's going to let him go, to which she tells Pete that he's always been unlovable. Pete calls Benson in to chew him out for his recommendation, but Benson tells him that Manolo isn't in love with his mother – because, apparently, he's into dudes, and so is Benson. Sadly, Benson's in love with Pete, who is not quite ready to return the sentiment. None of that matters, though, because I was right about the shorts. Also, Pete, Peggy, and Ted go out and get sloppy after an Ocean Spray meeting, and Pete clues in that Peggy and Ted have the mutual hots for each other, not that he disapproves. When Ted sees the rapport Pete and Peggy have, not knowing it's borne of their history together, he seems jealous; not only that, his wife tells him he's too focused on work even when he's not in the office. In the end, though, Ted seems to make the choice to stay with what he's got, which likely means Peggy's going to give Stan an even harder sell the time she has a rat problem, which will probably be tomorrow.

Mitchell, Sylvia and Arnold's son, is in the apartment when Don comes home, and Megan tells Don the kid sent back his draft card in protest and now wants to run to Canada to avoid possible prison time. Don tells her from experience that the kid can't spend his life on the run, but soon a fit-to-be-tied Arnold shows up at their door, and he and Don go out for a drink, whereupon Don reiterates the sentiment we've heard from him before that he's against the war. Feeling a sympathy for the kid he probably didn't know he was capable of, Don goes to Pete and asks him to get hold of his old DoD friend (the one that buried the investigation into Don's past when they were courting -- I think -- Northrop Grumman) to see if he can get Mitchell a deferment. Pete suggests Don turn to GM, but when Don feels them out at a dinner, the reaction is frosty, to say the least. Ted initially chews Don out for this, but when he hears the problem, he offers to make a call to a highly-place military officer to get the kid into a pilot program – in exchange for Don working with him in the future. Don sincerely agrees, and then calls a grateful and tearful Sylvia, which is a much better ending to their relationship than anything we saw before. Or it would be, except when Sally sneaks into Sylvia's place to try to retrieve a letter her friend Julie left for Mitchell on her behalf, she catches Don and Sylvia in flagrante and runs off in horror. Later, it's a Dinner O'Awkward, as a drunken Don barely is home for five minutes before Rosen and Mitchell show up to thank him in front of a nauseated Sally. Don lies to her about what she saw, and she tells him she believes it, but her fatherly worship looks like it's gone for good. ABOUT TIME.

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Ted, Pete and Peggy apparently had a great meeting, if their drunk-ass laughing in some fish shack is any indication. Peggy almost-slurs a request for Ted to get her another whiskey sour, and then they get into discussing air travel, with Pete eventually confessing the circumstances of his father's death before Ted sighs contentedly and tells them this is the agency he always wanted -- "ambition, brains and beauty." Easy, Ted -- Pete's going to get more male attention this episode than he wants as it is. Ted and Peggy exchange some words that would only be seen as flirtatious if A) you're a viewer of the show or B) you know Peggy in That Way, but because Pete can claim residency in column B, when Ted leaves the table to call his wife, Pete wink-winks about Peggy's obvious attraction. She's too drunk to deny it for long, but tells him nothing can happen. Pete goes on that Ted's obviously in love with Peggy too, and Peggy can't hide her joy at hearing that, but then covers by snarking that Pete's the one in love with Ted. Pete agrees that he could use an account and Ted's been generous, before taking a moment and remarking, "At least one of us ended up important." I don't know if it's the booze or Pete's recent misfortunes making him more humble, but this is better than him being jealous of every bit of success Peggy ever earned, and she seems to agree as she smiles beatifically at him. He asks her to tell him she doesn't pity him and she assures him she does not, whereupon they agree that they really know each other. Pete gives her the most genuinely fond smile I recall seeing from him in ages, and Peggy, I'd say if Ted doesn't work out, you've got someone on deck here.

Rather than visit that possibility, though, Peggy brings up the conversation she had with Dot, and when he hears some details, Pete asks exactly what she said. I guess he'll know after this to be more careful with his wording, because Peggy asks if his father ever gave her spa treatments "that released a 'fire in her loins'," and they laugh/almost-barf for a bit about that before Ted returns and is like, heeeeey, drunkies, let's hit the road? Peggy and Pete, though, can't stop the giggling fit into which they've dissolved and Ted looks a little jealous at the moment they're sharing. If it's any consolation, Ted, your tomorrow's going to be a lot less dehydrated than theirs.

Don's pouring a drink (that hardly narrows down the time frame, I know) when the doorbell rings, and he opens up to find Rosen, whom he invites in. Rosen says he would have called, but Sylvia's in a state and he then starts to bring up Mitchell's visit when Megan appears and haltingly confesses she wasn't sure if she should tell him. Rosen says Mitchell saved her the trouble, and they don't want Megan in the middle. "His mother's treating it like he's dying. She doesn't want anyone to know." After some talk of drinking...

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Manolo the Spanish-from-Spain nurse brings Pete's mother by the office, and Peggy chats with her only to find she's mistaken her for Trudy – and that she's getting some action. When Pete learns that his mom is apparently banging the nurse, he tells her he's going to let him go, to which she tells Pete that he's always been unlovable. Pete calls Benson in to chew him out for his recommendation, but Benson tells him that Manolo isn't in love with his mother – because, apparently, he's into dudes, and so is Benson. Sadly, Benson's in love with Pete, who is not quite ready to return the sentiment. None of that matters, though, because I was right about the shorts. Also, Pete, Peggy, and Ted go out and get sloppy after an Ocean Spray meeting, and Pete clues in that Peggy and Ted have the mutual hots for each other, not that he disapproves. When Ted sees the rapport Pete and Peggy have, not knowing it's borne of their history together, he seems jealous; not only that, his wife tells him he's too focused on work even when he's not in the office. In the end, though, Ted seems to make the choice to stay with what he's got, which likely means Peggy's going to give Stan an even harder sell the time she has a rat problem, which will probably be tomorrow.

Mitchell, Sylvia and Arnold's son, is in the apartment when Don comes home, and Megan tells Don the kid sent back his draft card in protest and now wants to run to Canada to avoid possible prison time. Don tells her from experience that the kid can't spend his life on the run, but soon a fit-to-be-tied Arnold shows up at their door, and he and Don go out for a drink, whereupon Don reiterates the sentiment we've heard from him before that he's against the war. Feeling a sympathy for the kid he probably didn't know he was capable of, Don goes to Pete and asks him to get hold of his old DoD friend (the one that buried the investigation into Don's past when they were courting -- I think -- Northrop Grumman) to see if he can get Mitchell a deferment. Pete suggests Don turn to GM, but when Don feels them out at a dinner, the reaction is frosty, to say the least. Ted initially chews Don out for this, but when he hears the problem, he offers to make a call to a highly-place military officer to get the kid into a pilot program – in exchange for Don working with him in the future. Don sincerely agrees, and then calls a grateful and tearful Sylvia, which is a much better ending to their relationship than anything we saw before. Or it would be, except when Sally sneaks into Sylvia's place to try to retrieve a letter her friend Julie left for Mitchell on her behalf, she catches Don and Sylvia in flagrante and runs off in horror. Later, it's a Dinner O'Awkward, as a drunken Don barely is home for five minutes before Rosen and Mitchell show up to thank him in front of a nauseated Sally. Don lies to her about what she saw, and she tells him she believes it, but her fatherly worship looks like it's gone for good. ABOUT TIME.

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...we cut to Don and Rosen in a bar, with Rosen telling him he's been meaning to visit him anyway before confessing he didn't even know Mitchell had left school, and Sylvia told him she didn't know either. "She's doing that a lot lately -- lying about little things." I wonder if he's counting the "smoking." He adds that he's known something's been wrong with her all year, and he probably wouldn't have to be such a detective if he'd actually been present for the times Sylvia screamed at "him." Don thinks there has to be a way out, to which Rosen bitterly replies that everyone's an expert on that subject, including Sylvia's father. "It's thrilling to see a plumber interpret international law." Don thinks Rosen's elite status as one of the top surgeons in the country surely has to be worth something, but Rosen -- a note of panic creeping into his voice -- says he knows a lot of people, but it doesn't change Mitchell's 1-A-ness. "He's on a damn list for the rest of his life." Don, unsure of what to say to that, offers that on some level, they should admire Mitchell's idealism, but Rosen -- approaching his wit's end -- tells him Sylvia won't let her baby rot in jail for a cause before asking what Don would do. God, "WWDDD" is not a slogan I need to contemplate. Rosen remembers that Don was in the service and asks if he saw action, and Don takes a loooong moment, probably trying to figure out how much he wants to reveal, before settling for saying it was very different, and he wanted to go... until he got there. Even though Don goes on to declare the war morally wrong, Rosen talks for a while about service being part of being an American and how he and Don understand that, and he's not coming out and saying it, exactly, but it sounds like he thinks his son is a soft mama's boy. Well, he does actually say "soft" explicitly, but then he tries -- not entirely successfully -- to hold back tears as he adds that Mitchell's the best, and Don looks like he might be moved in spite of himself. I mean, I'm sure his immediate solution will be to order another round, but still.

Nan is sitting in bed watching TV when Ted comes home, and it's clear she's got something to say -- Ted was supposed to have dinner with her and the kids. Ted doesn't know what the big deal is about one missed meal, but Nan reminds him what the minister at Gleason's funeral apparently said about God turning the lights off at any moment. "You know where you're going to be? The office." Ted assures her that the hours he's working are due to the merger, but she A) denies that and B) tells him that even when he's home, his thoughts are elsewhere, "and I can feel how disappointing this all is compared to your battles at work." This goes on for a bit, and Ted eventually hangs his head, to which Nan says she just wishes he liked being home more. Ted's like, I already bowed in submission, woman? What more do you want?

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Manolo the Spanish-from-Spain nurse brings Pete's mother by the office, and Peggy chats with her only to find she's mistaken her for Trudy – and that she's getting some action. When Pete learns that his mom is apparently banging the nurse, he tells her he's going to let him go, to which she tells Pete that he's always been unlovable. Pete calls Benson in to chew him out for his recommendation, but Benson tells him that Manolo isn't in love with his mother – because, apparently, he's into dudes, and so is Benson. Sadly, Benson's in love with Pete, who is not quite ready to return the sentiment. None of that matters, though, because I was right about the shorts. Also, Pete, Peggy, and Ted go out and get sloppy after an Ocean Spray meeting, and Pete clues in that Peggy and Ted have the mutual hots for each other, not that he disapproves. When Ted sees the rapport Pete and Peggy have, not knowing it's borne of their history together, he seems jealous; not only that, his wife tells him he's too focused on work even when he's not in the office. In the end, though, Ted seems to make the choice to stay with what he's got, which likely means Peggy's going to give Stan an even harder sell the time she has a rat problem, which will probably be tomorrow.

Mitchell, Sylvia and Arnold's son, is in the apartment when Don comes home, and Megan tells Don the kid sent back his draft card in protest and now wants to run to Canada to avoid possible prison time. Don tells her from experience that the kid can't spend his life on the run, but soon a fit-to-be-tied Arnold shows up at their door, and he and Don go out for a drink, whereupon Don reiterates the sentiment we've heard from him before that he's against the war. Feeling a sympathy for the kid he probably didn't know he was capable of, Don goes to Pete and asks him to get hold of his old DoD friend (the one that buried the investigation into Don's past when they were courting -- I think -- Northrop Grumman) to see if he can get Mitchell a deferment. Pete suggests Don turn to GM, but when Don feels them out at a dinner, the reaction is frosty, to say the least. Ted initially chews Don out for this, but when he hears the problem, he offers to make a call to a highly-place military officer to get the kid into a pilot program – in exchange for Don working with him in the future. Don sincerely agrees, and then calls a grateful and tearful Sylvia, which is a much better ending to their relationship than anything we saw before. Or it would be, except when Sally sneaks into Sylvia's place to try to retrieve a letter her friend Julie left for Mitchell on her behalf, she catches Don and Sylvia in flagrante and runs off in horror. Later, it's a Dinner O'Awkward, as a drunken Don barely is home for five minutes before Rosen and Mitchell show up to thank him in front of a nauseated Sally. Don lies to her about what she saw, and she tells him she believes it, but her fatherly worship looks like it's gone for good. ABOUT TIME.

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Don arrives at Dawn's desk and asks her to get Pete, but she tells him he's supposed to be in a status meeting and that she also needs to know whether he'll be attending the Chevrolet dinner that night. Don sighs in exasperation, but just then Pete appears, so Don pulls him into his office to ask if Pete's friend still works at the Department of Defense. Pete says no, but Don presses on anyway to ask how his friends get deferments for their kids. Pete runs down the standard answers -- college, divinity school, "medical baloney" -- but Don says he needs someone who can really pull strings. Pete points out that Don is having dinner with GM, one of the largest defense contractors in the world. When Don wonders what the politics of that request would be Pete snits that he doesn't know. "I'm not on Chevy." Heh. He walks out and Don trails after him, assuring that's not his fault before Pete tries to turn lemons into cranberry cocktail, bragging to the suddenly-appearing Roger that Ocean Spray loved them so much "they might even give us the blends." Heh. Roger, however, wonders about the potential conflict with Sunkist, and when Ted emerges from his office, a little kerfuffle ensues about who was supposed to tell who what when, and again, this is a PUBLIC COMPANY. Hire someone whose only job is to run back and forth between the partners and keep everyone up to speed! Anyway, Cutler, who's been twiddling his thumbs in the conference room this whole time, comes out and hears what's going on before proclaiming the two accounts about equal in billings. Ted points out they've already sunk five grand into Ocean Spray, and Roger's probably kicking himself for not booking the Presidential Suite for his California trip so he could match that number. Ted barks -- at Don, by the way, not Roger -- that maybe he should read a memo once in a while before stomping back into his office, whereupon everyone else breaks up. Great meeting!

Ted's lying on his couch, arm over his eyes, when Cutler enters and notes he warned Ted about the memos. "The more you send, the less they get read." Amen. He wonders why Ted is taking this so personally, adding that they'll end up with one juice account, but Ted snits, "I don't want his juice. I want my juice!" That's hot. Cutler doesn't have time for this nonsense and I don't know who can blame him.

In the lobby of his parents' building, Mitchell is hanging out talking to the doorman (the very same one who led off the season with the myocardial infarction) about Michigan -- he thinks it's beyond his reach, apparently -- when Sally and another girl (undoubtedly Julie) arrive. The doorman gives a typical Velveeta comment about them being a couple high-fashion models before introductions are made and Sally tells the doorman Don and Megan were supposed to leave a key, as she lost hers. The doorman doesn't know anything about it, though, and as he fumbles for his keys, Julie takes the opportunity to flirt with Mitchell a bit, and I'm not sure this character or the actor warrants the all the attention being devoted to them. I wouldn't wish Vietnam on anyone, but a little military service might not be amiss. The doorman tells Sally he'll let her and Julie in, whereupon Sylvia comes bustling off the elevator and declares the need for a cab, pronto, so the doorman hands Sally his set of keys while he heads out to find Sylvia that taxi for her precious boy in too-tight pants. Not to get ahead of myself, but I hope she's taking him to get his hair cut.

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Manolo the Spanish-from-Spain nurse brings Pete's mother by the office, and Peggy chats with her only to find she's mistaken her for Trudy – and that she's getting some action. When Pete learns that his mom is apparently banging the nurse, he tells her he's going to let him go, to which she tells Pete that he's always been unlovable. Pete calls Benson in to chew him out for his recommendation, but Benson tells him that Manolo isn't in love with his mother – because, apparently, he's into dudes, and so is Benson. Sadly, Benson's in love with Pete, who is not quite ready to return the sentiment. None of that matters, though, because I was right about the shorts. Also, Pete, Peggy, and Ted go out and get sloppy after an Ocean Spray meeting, and Pete clues in that Peggy and Ted have the mutual hots for each other, not that he disapproves. When Ted sees the rapport Pete and Peggy have, not knowing it's borne of their history together, he seems jealous; not only that, his wife tells him he's too focused on work even when he's not in the office. In the end, though, Ted seems to make the choice to stay with what he's got, which likely means Peggy's going to give Stan an even harder sell the time she has a rat problem, which will probably be tomorrow.

Mitchell, Sylvia and Arnold's son, is in the apartment when Don comes home, and Megan tells Don the kid sent back his draft card in protest and now wants to run to Canada to avoid possible prison time. Don tells her from experience that the kid can't spend his life on the run, but soon a fit-to-be-tied Arnold shows up at their door, and he and Don go out for a drink, whereupon Don reiterates the sentiment we've heard from him before that he's against the war. Feeling a sympathy for the kid he probably didn't know he was capable of, Don goes to Pete and asks him to get hold of his old DoD friend (the one that buried the investigation into Don's past when they were courting -- I think -- Northrop Grumman) to see if he can get Mitchell a deferment. Pete suggests Don turn to GM, but when Don feels them out at a dinner, the reaction is frosty, to say the least. Ted initially chews Don out for this, but when he hears the problem, he offers to make a call to a highly-place military officer to get the kid into a pilot program – in exchange for Don working with him in the future. Don sincerely agrees, and then calls a grateful and tearful Sylvia, which is a much better ending to their relationship than anything we saw before. Or it would be, except when Sally sneaks into Sylvia's place to try to retrieve a letter her friend Julie left for Mitchell on her behalf, she catches Don and Sylvia in flagrante and runs off in horror. Later, it's a Dinner O'Awkward, as a drunken Don barely is home for five minutes before Rosen and Mitchell show up to thank him in front of a nauseated Sally. Don lies to her about what she saw, and she tells him she believes it, but her fatherly worship looks like it's gone for good. ABOUT TIME.

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Pete, in a T-shirt and still mopping himself up from shaving, answers the door to find Manolo and Dot. He tells them they were supposed to meet him at the restaurant, and Manolo reproves Dot for not letting him manage his calendar, but it seems just as well, as Pete tells Manolo he'd like Dot to himself for the evening. Manolo bids her goodnight with a hand-kiss that doesn't go unnoticed. But Pete, come on -- it's practically an actionable offense for him not to do so. Dot wonders if Manolo really can't join them, but Pete clarifies that he has other plans, so apparently they discussed this in advance. When he's gone -- wouldn't mind knowing exactly where -- Pete offers Dot something, but she tells him Manolo doesn't like her to drink. Okay, this is where I'll admit to Pete it sounds serious. Pete offers that it's nice the way he looks after her, but she does know he's her nurse, right? "You are prone to moments of confusion." Dot: "I suppose there's a way I could mistake your tone for concern." Well, Pete, at least she's not having one of those moments right now. Pete sits with her and, with at least his baseline level of condescension if not more, tells her he's worried she's misconstrued Manolo's attention as affection, but his mother tells him to cut to the chase before confessing that "Manny has awakened a part of me that was long dormant." Rather than let any volcano metaphors, well, erupt further, Pete informs Dot they'll be letting Manolo go, as he's a "pervert." Dot stands and tells Pete he was a sour little boy and he's a sour little man. "How could I expect you to be understanding? You've always been unlovable!" Well, it's good to know his time on this show hasn't been a departure. With as much dignity as she can muster, which given the way she dresses is quite a bit, Dot takes her leave...

...whereupon we cut to a scene that's a bit less dignified, that being the Chevy client dinner, at which Don, Roger, Cutler and Ted are chuckling up a storm. Has Chevy just locked Ken up in a room for their own amusement ever since they learned he could tap-dance? It's his job, I guess. They're discussing fishing venues, and Don asks one of the two Chevy guys where he takes his KID fishing, and then a few people pipe up about KIDS, whereupon Don mentions his friend's kid who just got classified 1-A. I mean, it's obvious to us what Don's doing, and it seems wildly inappropriate given the setting, but on the other hand no one else knows his ulterior motive, so it seems a tad overblown to me for everyone to act like Don just announced he runs a dog-fighting ring in his spare time. Ted tries to make a that's-tough-let's-move-on comment, but Don goes on about his friend being beside himself, and now that I think about it, Don claiming even to have a friend is probably contributing to the dissonance here. He goes on about people "doing things," and one Chevy guy tells him he knows -- and it makes him sick. Cutler and Ted are both gaping at Don now in disbelief, but Roger -- with an assist from Cutler -- reliably succeeds in restoring the light mood. From the way Ted continues to stare at Don, though, he's not about to let this go, which should be fun.

With only a little lamp on, Sally and Julie are alternating writing ten things they like about Mitchell on a piece of paper, folding each answer up so the other can't see it until they're done. So like a slam book, only nice. They read a few entries -- Sally picked "his ass" because she claimed she couldn't think of anything else, which given the pants he was wearing is perfectly understandable -- but then Megan comes in and bites out that they have a big day, so they need to get to sleep. Julie sunnily wishes "Mrs. Draper" a good night and when she's gone, Sally asks Julie why she keeps calling her that. Julie: "Because she hates it." Julie, the jury's still out, but I'd book you for at least one more episode just on the strength of that line. Julie then tells Sally that Mitchell's right downstairs, and she should sneak down and kiss him. And I'm sure Betty would disapprove, but it's only right for a soldier going off to war!

A flashlight in hand, Peggy warily emerges from her bedroom and sees a trail of blood on the floor, which leads under the sofa. We don't see what's there, but the squeaking is a strong clue...

...so we cut to Peggy calling Stan, who groggily answers to the news of the rat in Peggy's apartment. He reminds her he told her to get traps, but she tells him the rat's in one and she thinks it's mortally wounded from all the blood. Stan: "Did you call an ambulance?" Hee. Peggy begs him to come over, but he points out he's not her boyfriend, to which she tries for sexy in saying that maybe she'll make it worth his while. Stan: "No, you won't." Not that I don't love the normal version, but Sleepy Stan is hilarious. This goes on for a bit until it becomes clear that there's someone in the bed with Stan. Peggy apologizes, but then is like, "You can bring her!" A three-way in front of a dead rat. I'd like to see the look on the face of the priest who draws her confession. Stan assures Peggy that the rat will be dead by morning before hanging up, so Peggy retreats to the safety of the bedroom. Peggy, time you're shopping for traps, buy the one marked "humane."

It's morning, and Julie's dressed, but Sally isn't as they sit at the breakfast counter. After some discussion of whether Sally's floor smells like pee, Megan enters and tells Sally to get a move on, as Megan has to get to work, but first she has to put the two of them in a cab. She then orders Sally to take the trash out, but Sally reminds her she has to get ready, so Julie tells "Mrs. Draper" she'll do it. Megan, with a brittle smile: "It's Megan." Hee. Julie mentions she'd love to visit the studio sometime, and then she attends to the garbage while Megan picks up the phone to call her agent...

...while Don hasn't been inside his office for more than ten seconds when Ted marches in and asks what the hell he was up to. Dawn then buzzes in to check on him, and I love how the secretaries always act like nervous mother hens every time someone manages to get by them. Ted bites out a reminder that Don said he wasn't going to be involved in Chevy until 1970, so perhaps he could kindly not cock things up for them now? Don informs him that not everything's about Ted, but Ted goes on that a client shouldn't have a single negative feeling when with them. His anger deflates, however, when he realizes that there's an actual kid involved, and after taking a few moments, he offers, "Well, I bet you don't have a lot of friends, Don, so I'm guessing this is important." Any wonder I love the man? Don admits that it is important, and he doesn't know what to do, but Ted has a question: "Does he wear glasses?" Not getting where Ted is going with this, Don says he doesn't think so but he could, but a "no" is what Ted was looking for -- the guy who taught him to fly is a Brigadier General in the Air National Guard, and "they're always looking for exceptional young men to become pilots." Whether or not that comment merits sarcasm in the current situation, the obvious implication is that this is an assignment that would keep Mitchell at home while satisfying his service requirement, and Don asks if Ted would really be willing to make that call. Ted says he'll consider it -- if Don will stop the personal war he's been waging on Ted.

Don claims not to know what Ted's on about, which could loosely be classified as "hilarious," but Ted clears it up for him with an example -- they're clearly going to get Ocean Spray, so he needs to stop chasing Sunkist. I think there are better examples than this of how Don's been at odds with Ted, not to mention that Ted could surely get away with a bigger ask here. Maybe at least require that Don not be late for partners' meetings anymore? Regardless, when Don sees how strongly Ted feels about it, he steps forward and shakes Ted's hand and sincerely thanks him. Ted: "This is not a handshake of gratitude. This is a binding contract." Heh. Don agrees and Ted turns to go, but Don asks him what the step is, so Ted tells him to have Mitchell write a letter about his childhood dream of being a pilot. "And it better be convincing. You should write it. And tell him to get a haircut." I'm sure Julie will be disappointed, but still: THANK you. Don asks what the real chances are, but Ted only assures him that he's going to call right now. When he's gone, Don asks Dawn to get Rosen on the phone. God, Don, don't jinx it! Did you grow up too poor for superstition?

When the phone rings at Chez Rosen, Sylvia answers, and she wonders how he can be calling, but Don says he was trying to reach her husband, as his office said he was home sick. He explains about Ted and the Air National Guard, and Sylvia's mood turns from despondent to tearily jubilant as she promises Don that Mitchell will follow through on whatever he needs to do. She asks if it's really possible, and Don tells her he thinks so but they have to act fast, so Sylvia informs him that Rosen and Mitchell went upstate to call on an Army buddy. He assures her it's going to be okay and she cries a bit more before raggedly telling him she feels better, but she'll feel better than that once she knows it's done. "It" not being the only thing. She then tells him she can't believe he'd do this for her, "and I hope you know that I was just frustrated with you." Really? He tells her he does now and when she says she didn't want him to fall in love, he wonders if she felt anything, and she tells him he was good to her. "Better than I was to you." Again, really? I suppose that's pretty much been my reaction whenever she says anything; this character honestly never has made any sense.

THIS SCENE. Benson appears in Pete's doorway and asks if they're going to lunch, but Pete seethes for him to get in there and close the door. Yes, sir! Pete barks that he asked for a nurse and Benson sent him a "rapist," to which Benson tells him in no uncertain terms to calm down and have a seat. He goes to Pete's bar and starts making them both a drink as Pete complains that Dot has the mind of a child, prompting Benson to point out that her story might not be completely reliable. Pete doesn't see it that way, though, so Benson tells him, a bit more pointedly, that he doesn't think Manolo's interests "turn that way." Pete grumbles about him being a "degenerate," and Benson inhales for a moment, looking like he's committing to a course of action, before sitting on the coffee table in front of Pete and ordering him to drink his cocktail down, after which Pete admits he feels better. Benson asks if Dot seemed happy and Pete has to confess that she did. From here, James Wolk makes a serious play for a guest actor Emmy as he steels himself by downing his own drink, donning a beatific smile, and launching into a Socratic speech about the possibility of falling in love with a person who takes care of you and would do anything for you. "If your well-being was his only thought, is it impossible that you might begin to feel something for him?"

Pete looks uncomprehending, so Benson goes on that if there's true love, it doesn't matter who it is -- and then lightly presses his knee into Pete's. Pete looks down, and then back up at Benson, and there's a second where it seems like Pete might smile, but his face eventually -- the moment is allowed to unfold -- reverts to the sour expression his mother knows so well as he pulls his knee away and says he'll give Manolo a month's pay. "And tell him it's disgusting." Clever of both the show and Pete to use Manolo as the surrogate object of Pete's scorn; it means he can reserve actual judgment on Benson. Benson holds his vulnerable, pleading expression for a moment longer, but then is back to his normal chipper, somewhat ersatz self as he tells Pete of course! No problem! When he turns to walk out, though, his smile appears more frozen than it was, so he's got to be worried about his job. Pete, for his part, looks upset, though I read it as more of a "why did he pick me" face than general disgust with homosexuality. I mean, Pete went to boarding school, right? Great work by both actors, but like I said, this is Wolk's Emmy-reel moment.

In a cab, Sally's reciting facts about the Philippines, but Julie's more interested in discussing what Sally's going to do when Mitchell asks her to go all the way. Given some of the lines Sally's come up with over the years, I'm kind of interested myself, but Sally points out that Mitchell doesn't have any idea who she is. Julie, however, tells Sally that she took the "10 Things I Like" letter, signed Sally's name to it and slid it under the Rosen's back door. Sally's mortified, not least because it's going to look like she's so in love she couldn't keep her handwriting straight, but Julie assures her she'll thank her. Maybe, but are you going to care to hear it if she's already killed you?

Sally comes rushing back into the building, and the fact that she's alone lends support to my theory that Julie's parents are going to be getting some bad news. She stammers to our favorite doorman, who's just begun his shift, that she doesn't have her key, and he asks in a hilariously lugubrious tone of voice - the kind you'd use on a five-year-old who misplaced his lunchbox -- if she lost it already, but does give up his master set, AGAIN! And here he just was lecturing the departing doorman on protocol. Sally rushes into the elevator, and as the doorman repeats his cheese-tastic line about high-fashion models to an elderly woman and her maid, Sally looks for the key that's the true object of her errand...

...and, after listening and knocking at the Rosen back door, she uses the key and enters. She sees the letter on the counter across the room, tempting her like something out of Alice In Wonderland (right, Danny?), but when she goes to retrieve it, she catches sight of Don and Sylvia, well, bringing action back to the maid's room. Sally's so stunned she drops the keys, and when Don and Sylvia look up, it's a close race as to who looks more horrified. After a moment of shock all around, Sally grabs the keys (but not the letter) and hightails it out of there, and Don tries to follow, but of course he has to put himself together first. Meanwhile, Sylvia, like, collapses on the bed in panic, because of course she does. Don's search for Sally takes him up to his apartment and down to the lobby, but proves fruitless, as she's escaped in a cab. Don looks sweaty and ashen as he uncertainly walks out to the street, and for once, drugs and alcohol aren't involved.

Pete arrives home, pours a little Raisin Bran into a bowl, and angrily throws the box into the Pullman kitchen when he sees it's empty. Pete, if you were with Benson, your Raisin Bran would always be kept lovingly overflowing. (I don't think that was dirty, but I'll apologize nonetheless.)

Peggy sits smoking on her couch, an orange rat-catching (presumably) tabby by her side. Start the clock -- as Peggy's mother would be happy to tell you, she's now got 39 years to live. (I can never not link to that video.)

Ted arrives home and in his bedroom, his two boys are watching TV with Nan asleep on the bed, a book atop her. He beckons to them to be quiet, but carries the younger one out on his shoulders as the older one follows...

...and after a shot of Don drinking alone in a bar...

...he's stumbling home. Once he negotiates the door, Megan's voice calls out, and he teeters in to find her, Sally and Julie sitting at the table eating. Megan kisses him and then is like, WOW, boozebag, and having already gotten a hateful glare from Sally, he says he's going to lie down, but Megan insists he eat something first. He's barely sat down, though, before the doorbell rings -- it's Rosen and Mitchell. Sally tries to excuse herself, but Julie won't let her, and then Rosen and Mitchell appear, and Mitchell holds out a hand and thanks Don for what he did. Good start, kid, but you still need to cut that hair. Megan's in the dark, so Rosen tells her Don talked to someone on their behalf, and Sylvia is just overwhelmed with gratitude. Sally looks like she's considering making a run for the balcony railing rather than listen to this conversation, especially since she can't help but have concluded that Don only helped Mitchell because of his residency between Sylvia's legs. And Mitchell's probably read the letter by now. Sally holds it together until Mitchell and Rosen leave, but when Megan gushes that Don's the sweetest man, Sally stands, spits that she makes him sick and runs to her room. Megan looks to Julie for an explanation, but of course Julie has none to provide, so Don goes to talk to her as Julie tells Megan that Sally has a crush on Mitchell. You'd think, then, that Megan would give a little more thought as to what could be bothering Sally...

...but regardless, we cut to Don knocking on Sally's door. Ordering her to open the door doesn't work, but when he urgently tells her he needs to talk to her, she at least consents to come to the door and listen. Don starts to give her a bullshit story about how he was "comforting" Sylvia, and Sally doesn't even wait to hear all of it before breaking down in tears, so low has her father sunk in her eyes. He tells her the situation is very complicated, and that's of course not really true, but what is true is that Sally is caught in a very grown-up web of lies, as she can't say anything without Megan getting terribly hurt. So, she tells Don "okay" even though she doesn't believe it, and after he trudges down the hallway, she collapses miserably onto her bed. He looks back at her door before closing his, and we're out. Fantastic episode, taking some plotlines that were really poorly told up to this point and making something real and believable out of them, as well as building effectively on some stuff that was already interesting. And Benson, if Pete won't have you, there are plenty of guys who would be lucky to. Sal must be divorced by now, right?

John Ramos is a writer and film producer living in Los Angeles. His new film, a documentary on online privacy and the sale of personal data called Terms And Conditions May Apply, will be in theaters in July. You can get news on it from the film's Twitter account. Also, you can email John at couchbaron@gmail.com, follow him on Twitter at https://twitter.com/couchbaron, or check out his blog, "Pull Up A Chair," which he'd just love for you to stop by.

Think you've got game? Prove it! Check out Games Without Pity, our new area featuring trivia, puzzle, card, strategy, action and word games -- all free to play and guaranteed to help pass the time until your show starts.

...but regardless, we cut to Don knocking on Sally's door. Ordering her to open the door doesn't work, but when he urgently tells her he needs to talk to her, she at least consents to come to the door and listen. Don starts to give her a bullshit story about how he was "comforting" Sylvia, and Sally doesn't even wait to hear all of it before breaking down in tears, so low has her father sunk in her eyes. He tells her the situation is very complicated, and that's of course not really true, but what is true is that Sally is caught in a very grown-up web of lies, as she can't say anything without Megan getting terribly hurt. So, she tells Don "okay" even though she doesn't believe it, and after he trudges down the hallway, she collapses miserably onto her bed. He looks back at her door before closing his, and we're out. Fantastic episode, taking some plotlines that were really poorly told up to this point and making something real and believable out of them, as well as building effectively on some stuff that was already interesting. And Benson, if Pete won't have you, there are plenty of guys who would be lucky to. Sal must be divorced by now, right?

John Ramos is a writer and film producer living in Los Angeles. His new film, a documentary on online privacy and the sale of personal data called Terms And Conditions May Apply, will be in theaters in July. You can get news on it from the film's Twitter account. Also, you can email John at couchbaron@gmail.com, follow him on Twitter at https://twitter.com/couchbaron, or check out his blog, "Pull Up A Chair," which he'd just love for you to stop by.

Think you've got game? Prove it! Check out Games Without Pity, our new area featuring trivia, puzzle, card, strategy, action and word games -- all free to play and guaranteed to help pass the time until your show starts.

...but regardless, we cut to Don knocking on Sally's door. Ordering her to open the door doesn't work, but when he urgently tells her he needs to talk to her, she at least consents to come to the door and listen. Don starts to give her a bullshit story about how he was "comforting" Sylvia, and Sally doesn't even wait to hear all of it before breaking down in tears, so low has her father sunk in her eyes. He tells her the situation is very complicated, and that's of course not really true, but what is true is that Sally is caught in a very grown-up web of lies, as she can't say anything without Megan getting terribly hurt. So, she tells Don "okay" even though she doesn't believe it, and after he trudges down the hallway, she collapses miserably onto her bed. He looks back at her door before closing his, and we're out. Fantastic episode, taking some plotlines that were really poorly told up to this point and making something real and believable out of them, as well as building effectively on some stuff that was already interesting. And Benson, if Pete won't have you, there are plenty of guys who would be lucky to. Sal must be divorced by now, right?

John Ramos is a writer and film producer living in Los Angeles. His new film, a documentary on online privacy and the sale of personal data called Terms And Conditions May Apply, will be in theaters in July. You can get news on it from the film's Twitter account. Also, you can email John at couchbaron@gmail.com, follow him on Twitter at https://twitter.com/couchbaron, or check out his blog, "Pull Up A Chair," which he'd just love for you to stop by.

Think you've got game? Prove it! Check out Games Without Pity, our new area featuring trivia, puzzle, card, strategy, action and word games -- all free to play and guaranteed to help pass the time until your show starts.