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When Jack starts asking creepy pregnancy-related questions, Sun makes Kate tell her what the deal is with pregnant ladies on the Island. Kate tells her that Juliet was the Others' fertility doctor, but she isn't sure she's in the Losties' HMO preferred provider network. Sun clears the insurance red tape by charging over to Juliet and demanding answers. Being an Other, Juliet refuses to tell her anything until she can sneak into her tent in the middle of the night and drag her out into the jungle. Turns out Juliet is taking Sun to the medical hatch to give her an ultrasound in order to determine the date of conception. Turns out the baby was conceived on the Island, which is good for Jin and his magically-improved sperm count, but lousy for Sun, who may have only two months to live. Juliet leaves Sun outside to contemplate her imminent doom while she ducks back into the hatch to make a quick report to Ben. Damn those evil HMOs! Always plotting to steal babies!
Meanwhile, Charlie, Desmond, Jin, and Hurley (Island Scout Troop 108) are out in the woods trying to save the downed pilot's life and finally earn their field medicine merit badges. The pilot was skewered by a branch during her emergency drop and is quickly dying. Luckily the flare that Hugo accidentally set off brings help. Unluckily the help arrives in the form of the recently dead. Zombies?! Here? No! Yes, Mikhail, a.k.a. Patch Adams, has risen from the grave and is responding to cries for help. He saves the pilot's life in exchange for everyone pretending he was never there. He makes it hard for them to pretend, though, when he tries to steal their satellite phone.
To make matters even worse, once the pilot wakes up, she claims that there is no way the Losties are survivors of Flight 815. Because they found that plane and there were no survivors. Aw crap, is M. Night Shyamalan guest-directing this episode and no one told me? Want more? The full recap starts right below!
Since this episode is titled D.O.C. -- and we all know that is an abbreviation for Denominazione di Origine Controllata that is placed on Italian wine bottles to indicate where a wine comes from, the grapes used in it and how it was produced -- I can only assume the writers want everyone to get rip-roaring drunk while watching this episode. I'd hate to disappoint them. The only question is Thunderbird or Night Train? This would have been easily answered back when Night Train was a fine apple wine (Such depth of flavor! Such unusual mouth-feel!), but some years ago it switched its old family recipe and began producing a fine grape wine which pretty much tastes like an unholy union between grape Kool Aid and rubbing alcohol. Which is basically what Thunderbird always tastes like. Maybe I'll head towards the Boone's, just for old times sake and, you know, Boone! That's weird. Did you know that Boone's is not D.O.C. certified? Huh.
As we know, Sun is pregnant. But unlike some lazy pregnant women, this fact does not stop her from working on her hands and knees in the garden. Since Charlie, her ersatz kidnapper, has gone camping, Sun probably feels secure there, but that feeling only lasts a moment as Jack lurks in the bushes. She looks around, panicked, until Jack wanders out and starts asking all sorts of creepy personal questions. He says he stopped by her tent, but Jin wasn't there. Sun explains that he is off with Desmond, Hurley, and Charlie. Jack was looking for her anyway because he wants to know all sorts of doctorly things like how she feels and if she is bleeding. That stops Sun in her garden-digging tracks. She demands to know what's up and why he is asking such horrifying questions, but he plays his I'm-a-doctor-and-have-free-rein-to-ask-creepy-questions card. Not to be trumped, Sun simply smiles and says she's fine.
Jack walks off as Sun has a flashback. She and Jin, just married, have moved into their new apartment. Jin calls to say that he stopped by the new pad and it's full of boxes, but he found time to set up the bed, nudge nudge, wink wink. Sun giggles and sits down on a park bench and announces that she is madly in love with him. As she hangs up the phone, a woman on the bench looks at Sun. She points at a wedding announcement in the paper and asks if that's her in the picture. Sun smiles and says yes. The stranger points out how handsome Jin is and Sun says she is a lucky girl. Then the woman reads that Sun's father runs Paik Automotive and comments on what a powerful family it is. Sun is starting to look suspicious, but she keeps calm by stating that she has nothing to do with the family business. The stranger keeps going though and asks about Jin's parents. When Sun says they're dead, the woman's demeanor changes and she starts to get snippy. Sun demands to know who she is, but the woman will only say that it would bring dishonor if people knew Mr. Paik's daughter married the son of a fisherman. Sun says she already knew that and doesn't care. The woman gets up and asks if she knew that Jin's mother was a prostitute. Sun is shocked and insulted. Just then, Wilmer Valderrama and a cameraman jump out of the background crowd and the stranger points her finger in Sun's face and says, "Yo' momma so hairy, they filmed Gorillas in the Mist in her shower." Sun doesn't respond, so the woman adds, "Yo' Momma so stupid, it took her 2 hours to watch 60 Minutes!" Wilmer giggles, Sun looks confused, and the woman demands $100,000 dollars or else she'll blab. Sun has to meet her in the park in three days to pay up. We have just enough time for two fruitless questions: How did the blackmailer know Sun was going to be in the park? Did she wait around all day just in case or was she just lucky? Meh.
Scout Troop 108 of Craphole Island is gathered around the downed pilot. Jin asks Desmond who she is, but Desmond claims not to know her despite the fact that she knows his name. She is unconscious and muttering, but no one knows what she is saying until Hurley recognizes it as Spanish. He translates that she is dying. They don't understand why she is saying that until they pull aside her jacket and find a branch sticking out of her. They all panic Keystone Kops style. Desmond tells Hurley to get the first aid kit, but Hurley is immobilized with the thought that their rescuer is dying! Oh Hurley, three seasons in and you still aren't used to this plot device? As Hurley finally runs for the medical kit, Desmond and Charlie argue about how they obviously need Jack, but they can't take her to the beach in that state, but it would take at least sixteen hours to get to Jack and back! Desmond says he will run, but Charlie can't let him go without reminding him that they are not alone on the Island and that some people (Not saying who! No finger pointing here!) would like them all dead. Desmond screeches (in a sexy Scottish way), "No one knows we are here!" Just then Hurley fires a flare straight into the air. As everyone turns to stare at him, he mutters "oops" as disingenuously as possible for a guy who just "accidentally" put his finger on the trigger and "accidentally" shot a flare gun.
Back in the lovely love nest of an apartment, Sun is unpacking boxes when Jin comes in with Sun's favorite for dinner: tofu soup! There is something seriously wrong with that. Sun asks if she can put a photo of her family on the table. Jin looks at the photo and says that even in a cap and gown, Sun is the sexiest woman he's ever seen. Oh, newlyweds are so cute! Just you wait, Miss Sun! In a few years Jin will look at that picture and tell you that you look like an oversized Brainy Smurf with a pizza box on your head and your mom and dad hate him so why do you have to have their picture in the living room to remind him of all his failures? Sun smiles and asks if he has any photos of his family. He says that they didn't have a camera growing up. She pushes him and he gets aggro when she catches him in the lie. She apologizes and changes the subject. Oh, newlyweds are so cute!
Kate and Sun are doing something to Kate's tent. Sawyer-proofing, perhaps? Sun catches Kate staring at Dr. Jack, and she asks Kate what she thinks happened to Jack when he was with the Others. Kate says that he said he was pretty much a prisoner and did whatever they said in hopes they would let him off the Island. Sun suggests that maybe he is working for Them now. He was alone with them for an entire week and when he came back he started asking her all sorts of questions about her baby. Maybe the Others want her baby? Maybe Sun is the only smart person on the Island? Except for Sayid, of course, but he is apparently on an Island press junket for his new movie and is nowhere to be seen... sigh. Kate yells over the scary music that has started up, "He's not working with them!" Tipped off by the doom-and-gloom tune, Sun is suspicious and asks Kate if she knows something. Kate looks troubled, but in a shocking turn of events, she decides to tell Sun what she knows. The celebratory information-sharing confetti and balloons drop down! Hooray for communication! Kate points at Juliet and says she was the Others' fertility doctor, and when Claire was sick, Juliet told her and Jack that the reason the Others wanted Claire's baby was for research. Sun looks grim, but decides to take action. She charges over to Juliet. Kate races after her, but Sun tells her to go away. Sun gets all up in Juliet's face and demands to know what happens to pregnant women on the Island. She wants to know why they are taking children. Juliet perks up and asks Sun if she is pregnant. Sun doesn't answer but starts twitching and yelling that everyone else may be okay with her eating their food and washing her clothes, but she wants answers. Go Sun go! Sun points her finger in Juliet's face and yells that she wants to know what happens to pregnant women on the Island! Juliet tells her that they all die. Sun looks stunned. Kate walks up and leads Sun away, giving Juliet some serious bitch face as she goes.
The troops are still gathered around the pilot (who is now muttering in Chinese) trying to decide what to do. Desmond is determined to go for Jack, but Charlie says he can't leave them -- he is forgetting what is at stake! Desmond balks at this because the pilot said his name and was carrying a picture of him and his girlfriend. Their hard-to-follow logic is interrupted by a noise. Something is breaking sticks out in the jungle. It's getting closer, so Desmond draws his machete. The sound is right upon them and the trees split apart. It's a zombie! It's a ghoul! It's Nikki! Back from the dead! Okay, it's not. But it is the recently deceased Mikhail Bakunin (that's Patch Adams to you and me, and the father of anarchy to everyone else) who comes barreling through the woods. As he stares around at the Losties with his one good eye, his thoughts are painted all over his face: Busted! He makes a break for it, not realizing that none of them know who he is. That doesn't stop Jin from chasing him through the woods and taking him down. They fighty-fight and wrestle until Jin gets him in a headlock. Here is something that bothers me about the fight scenes on this show: Does everyone know how to fight before they get to the Island? Or are people's tendencies to be total wusses cured by the Island's magical healing properties? I'm asking because Jin totally nailed Mikhail's ass (well, technically his head) with a roundhouse kick and a clap to the ears. Impressive grappling!
Desmond pries Patch from the headlock to pin him against a tree and point the flare gun at him. He demands to know who he is, but Patch is shy and won't say. Charlie says he's the guy who shot Sayid. Hurley says he thought that Locke killed that guy by shoving him through the perimeter fence. Whoever he is they agree he is definitely an Other. Desmond shoves the gun into Patch's chest and tells him to talk. Patch scoffs because it's just a flare gun, but Desmond points out that a flare gun might hurt too. Patch points out that he was dead not too long ago. I point out that I might be kind of pissed if I was brought back from the dead and still had only one eye, lousy teeth, and the same ugly ass dirty khaki jumpsuit. Jesus at least got nice white robes. The injured pilot interrupts their détente by mumbling some more. Patch looks like he understands, and Desmond asks what she's saying. She's saying that she is dying, in Italian. Is knowing how to say, "I am dying" in a multitude of languages something you can put on your resume? Patch examines the pilot and explains that the branch punctured her lung, which is now filling up with blood. If the lung isn't drained soon, she will die. Oh, the pilot is dying? You don't say. Except when you do. In four languages. Patch offers up his services as a field medic, but only if they agree to "let me walk away as if I never came upon you." Those Others sure talk funny. Desmond agrees to the trade.
Sun sits on the beach, staring at the water and looking bereft. She turns to watch Claire with Aaron and looks even more glum. Back in the past, the newlywed and newly blackmailed Sun has tracked down Jin's father. When she approaches him on the dock, she is surprised to find that he knows all about her and seems genuinely excited to meet her. He takes her to his house for tea and asks about the wedding. She says it was the happiest day of her life, and he opines that it was for his son, too. She asks him why he wasn't at the wedding. He asks what Jin told her, and she says he told her his parents were dead. His father looks chagrined but says it was to avoid the shame. His dad then confirms that Jin's mother was a prostitute. That she was with many men and left the baby with him. He doesn't even know if he is the father but he raised Jin anyway. He smiles, wipes off his hands, and touches Sun's face. He tells her that she's beautiful and he is glad he met her. Then he asks her to never tell Jin that she met him or that his mother is still alive. He should not have to suffer the shame. Jin's dad is a really good, understated actor. Damn it, I hate it when there is nothing to make fun of in a scene. Oh right, Jin's momma's such a ho, the only thing she won't do is the dishes!
It's night on the Island, and Sun is asleep in her tent when a hand reaches over her face. She screams when she realizes it's Juliet acting straight out of the Other playbook. There must be a playbook, 'cause how else would they all know how to act so darn creepy? Juliet tells Sun that she can help her baby and she has answers, but Sun has to go with her right now. Alone. When Juliet removes her hand, Sun saves me the trouble of asking why she should bother going with her if she is as good as dead already. Juliet says there may be hope for her yet. Don't believe it, Sun! They all say that! Juliet gets up and offers Sun her hand. Using torches to light their way, Juliet and Sun make their way through the jungle. Sun asks where they are going. Juliet says they are going to a medical facility where she can give Sun an ultrasound. Sun says Kate and Claire told her the place was abandoned. Juliet claims they just didn't know where to look. Sun asks what Juliet is going to do to her, which is a question probably better asked before you left the safety of the camp. Juliet wants to determine the D.O.C. or the date of conception. Date of conception? D.O.C. has nothing to do with wine? Well, shoot. There goes my one-woman theme party! Oh well, no harm done, now I'm just a lady gettin' sauced on the couch on bum wine and Cheetos. Classy like. Juliet explains that if the baby was conceived off Island the baby should be fine. If the baby was conceived on the Island, well, they will cross that bridge when they come to it. Do you think the Dharma Initiative made a fine apple wine? Or a Dharma Initiative 20/20 blue raspberry-flavored wine product? I sure hope so, in case Sun needs to get really likkered up at the end of this episode. Don't worry -- it's good for babies! Juliet asks Sun when was the last time she and Jin had sex. Sun looks taken aback. Juliet tries the I-can-ask-any-embarrassing-thing-I-want-because-I-went-to-medical-school routine, but Sun. Does. Not. Want. To. Talk. About. It. Juliet gets the hint and continues heading for the medical station.
Flashback: Sun goes to her father's high-ceilinged office to ask for the money to pay the blackmailer. Her father has a crap receptionist who walks Sun into the middle of a meeting and then announces to her father that she is there. You just can't find good help these days! The suits get nervous and clear out of the room. Her dad asks what's up and she says she needs a favor. And by "favor" she means "$100,000." He wants to know why, but she won't tell him. He demands as answer, and she gets the money by blackmailing him. She says she deserves the money because she has spent her entire life pretending she doesn't know what he does. She will continue pretending if he gives her the money. He demands an answer anyway, and she says it's to protect someone she loves from great shame. She lets him believe it is for Jin. He reaches into the safe behind him and pulls out the cash. He says that if the money is for her husband then he must bear the debt. Jin will now work for him. She basically puts Jin into indentured servitude to her father. Better a slave than finding out your mother's a ho, I always say. Well, when it comes up in conversation.
In the dark of night, Patch Adams prepares to play doctor and is clearing the area in preparation. He asks if they know anything about the pilot, if she came with anything. Hurley says she came with a book and a satellite phone thingy. Charlie's jaw drops as he stares at him in horror, and Hurley quickly realizes his mistake. When Patch asks if the phone works Hurley says, "Um, yeah, like I'd tell you." Good save Hugo! Now he'll never know! In a disgusting display of field surgery, Mikhail saves the pilot's life by stabbing her with a syringe and venting the blood from her lung. Desmond helps. She says something to him and Desmond wants to know what she said. Mikhail claims she said thank you, but I don't think so. I think she said, "That's freakin' revolting!"
Sun and Juliet arrive at the medical facility. As Juliet pulls the vines off from the hidden door, heads down the stairs, and turns on the flickering florescent lights so they can shine on the dirty rust-covered walls and dingy Formica floors, Sun starts to look skeptical about the Island's HMO. Bet that's the last time she steps out of the preferred provider network! Sun stands stock still in the moldy hallway and wants to know why Juliet is helping her. Juliet says that once upon a time, she told women that they were pregnant and it was the best news they ever heard. Now she tells people they are pregnant and... she lost nine patients in three years. Geez, who tells their new patient that statistic? Let them find it out online like everyone else. Juliet wants to tell people good news again. She wants to tell Sun that she and her husband conceived before they landed on Craphole Island and everything will be fine. Sun confesses that she slept with another man before she got to the Island. She says that it was a mistake. Juliet says everyone makes mistakes. Gosh, Juliet, would those mistakes include helping betray all the Losties, sleeping with Goodwin, torturing people, and Botoxing your entire head? They prepare for the ultrasound, which involves secret latches, hidden doors, and swinging bookcases. The room hidden behind all the spyware is done up like a nursery. Sort of. Sun demands to know what the room was used for. Juliet gulps and explains that it was where they brought the women to die. Sun looks horrified. Awkward!
Patch says the pilot is fine. As long as they keep the wound clean (easy task in the middle of a jungle, no doubt) she should be fine in a day. Charlie snorts, "A day? Her lung was punctured." Don't argue with the doctor, Charlie! Patch smirks and says that wounds are different on the Island, so maybe a day and a half. Patch gets up from his examination of the patient and says he kept his word and saved the pilot. Now they have to let him go. He walks off while Charlie and Desmond argue about whether they should let him leave. Desmond argues that they have to build a stretcher and carry the pilot back and can't keep a prisoner as well. Charlie says that he will take responsibility. Jin meanwhile has figured out that Patch has made off with the satellite phone. Jin rushes after him and the others follow, not understanding what Jin is doing. He grabs Patch, shakes him down, and gets the phone back. Desmond is upset, and Charlie can't believe he would try something like that. Um, why? They are always trying something like that. Patch smirks and says, "You wouldn't respect me if I didn't try, eh?" I haven't heard that line since I was in high school! Charlie tries to play like the big boys and asks Patch if he would respect him if he took his Other eye. Patch basically pats him on the head and Charlie makes a hobbit-sized attempt at a bum rush. Desmond and Jin hold him back and despite Charlie's protestations that they can't keep letting the Others go, Desmond lets him go because they gave their word. And if a man doesn't have his word, what does he have? Desmond looks exactly like this picture of Jesus my mother has in her bathroom. He watches over you while you tinkle. It's very reassuring.
In the medical station, Sun announces that the baby is not Jin's. They tried to have a baby back in Korea and it didn't work. The doctor said Jin was infertile. Juliet says that was before they came here. Dirty! She explains that the average male sperm count is between fifty and sixty million. On the Island it is five times that. TMI. She says she thinks those are pretty good odds. I think with that much excess sperm around, it's a good idea not to sit on any toilet seats , to knock really loudly before entering any tents, and to stay far, far away from the porn stash. Oh, and Kate? Maybe you should Sawyer-proof your knickers, too. Juliet tells Sun to lift her shirt so she can do the ultrasound. Sun asks if she will see the baby, and Juliet says it's still her first trimester so they might. Sun asks how it works, and Juliet explains that it's magic! Sun has apparently never seen or heard of an ultrasound machine before. Juliet explains that she will measure the fetus and figure out when it was conceived and then they will know who... Sun looks distressed. She has realized that she loses either way: if she is going to live, the baby is not Jin's. If the baby is Jin's, then she is totally going to have to look for a new television show. Juliet asks her if she wants to do it anyway, and she says yes. Juliet smiles, "The moment of truth," and starts the ultrasound.
In the box-littered apartment, Sun stares blankly at the half-made bed. When she hears Jin come in, she grabs a pillow and pretends to be working. Wouldn't want your new husband thinking you were paying off blackmailers instead of cleaning house all day! Jin asks if she got the mail. She forgot, so he gets the mail key out of her purse. He finds the money instead. Sun is embarrassed to have a purse so large that $100,000 in cash gets lost in it. She says that the money was from her father. She wanted furniture and a nice honeymoon. Jin looks hurt and tells her that he will always take care of her. It will take a little longer, but he will. She says she knows. He says he doesn't want to be in debt to her father any more than they already are. He asks her to take the money back, and she agrees after they exchange "I love you"s. I feel the need to mention that my husband would never, ever, ever ask me to give back a hundred thousand dollars from my father so that he can provide for me. No, he would not.
Juliet shows Sun her baby. It is a grayish blob on the bottom of the screen. Sun asks if it's a boy or a girl blob. Juliet rolls her eyes and says that it's a little early to tell the sex since it is still in the gray blob stage of fetal development. The blob is apparently fluttering. That means the heartbeat is very strong and healthy. Sun and Juliet are both smiling while Juliet starts her calculations. She determines that they crashed here 90 days ago and the baby is about eight weeks old. Which means it was conceived on the Island. Sun starts crying. She covers her face while Juliet tries to comfort her by telling her she will do everything she can to save her. And the nine patients you killed? You weren't doing everything to save them? Sun takes her hand off her face, and through the tears she is smiling. The baby is Jin's. Okay, girls: listen up! Here is one good reason not to have an affair: Guilt. If you cheat on your husband, crash on a desert island, reconcile with your husband, find out that you are pregnant, determine that if it's your husband's baby it will kill you, and then find out that it is, and you are happy about the news, it is safe to assume the guilt must be a real bitch. Lesson learned!
Sun goes to meet her blackmailer. She hands the woman the envelope of cash. The woman grabs it, opens it, and stares inside. Sun puts her hand on the envelope and asks why the woman did not tell her she was Jin's mother. The woman says just because she gave birth to him does not make her his mother. Word! Sun relinquishes her hold on the money but not before threatening her. She looks the woman hard in the face and says, "You know how powerful my family is. Jin thinks you are dead. Don't force me to make it a reality." The woman pales as Sun walks off into the sunset, blowing the smoke off her blazin' guns. Aw, Sun, Sayid has nothing on you!
In the early morning light, Sun stumbles up the stairs of the medical station. Juliet is closing the hatch doors when she notices that Sun is not doing so well. She comes over to Sun who asks how long she has. Juliet says that most of the women made it until the middle of their second trimester. No one made it to her third. Sun says she has two months. Which is two years based on the current Lost timeline. Don't file for unemployment yet, Sun! Sun says she is happy that the baby is Jin's. Juliet gave her good news. Juliet smiles and says she is going back into the medical facility to cover their tracks. She wants to make sure everything is in order. Sun decides to stay outside. Juliet rushes back into the station, heads for the locker room, reaches into a locker, pulls out a tape recorder and makes a report to Ben. She says it is 6:00 AM on Saturday morning. She has confirmed Sun's pregnancy, the fetus is healthy, and it was conceived on Island, with her husband, who was sterile before coming to the Island. She says she will try to get samples from the other women. She should have Austen's soon. She will report back then. She so evil! She turns off the tape recorder and adds the postscript: "I hate you." She so complicated!
Charlie and Jin are making a stretcher to carry the pilot back to the beach. Charlie tells Desmond that you can't trust the Others. They should have killed Patch before he comes back with five more. Desmond says, "By my count, you have killed more of them then they have of you." Charlie says, "They started it." Desmond says, "I am rubber you are glue." The pilot wakes up while Hugo is pretending to call his mom on the satellite phone. I guess being marooned on an Island must be boring after awhile. The pilot asks where she is, and Hugo confesses he doesn't know. Hugo asks her if she's there to rescue them and if there are more people with her and if she can make her phone work. She asks who he is. He introduces himself and says they are survivors of Flight 815. The pilot says that is impossible. Hurley says it wasn't easy, but they found a hatch with food. She says it's impossible because they found Oceanic Flight 815. They found the plane. There were no survivors. They were all dead. Hurley and I ask simultaneously, "What?" Mr. Conspiracy Theory is jumping up and down in glee. As for me, I'm too drunk to care. Which is just the way I like it.
In the early morning light, Sun stumbles up the stairs of the medical station. Juliet is closing the hatch doors when she notices that Sun is not doing so well. She comes over to Sun who asks how long she has. Juliet says that most of the women made it until the middle of their second trimester. No one made it to her third. Sun says she has two months. Which is two years based on the current Lost timeline. Don't file for unemployment yet, Sun! Sun says she is happy that the baby is Jin's. Juliet gave her good news. Juliet smiles and says she is going back into the medical facility to cover their tracks. She wants to make sure everything is in order. Sun decides to stay outside. Juliet rushes back into the station, heads for the locker room, reaches into a locker, pulls out a tape recorder and makes a report to Ben. She says it is 6:00 AM on Saturday morning. She has confirmed Sun's pregnancy, the fetus is healthy, and it was conceived on Island, with her husband, who was sterile before coming to the Island. She says she will try to get samples from the other women. She should have Austen's soon. She will report back then. She so evil! She turns off the tape recorder and adds the postscript: "I hate you." She so complicated!
Charlie and Jin are making a stretcher to carry the pilot back to the beach. Charlie tells Desmond that you can't trust the Others. They should have killed Patch before he comes back with five more. Desmond says, "By my count, you have killed more of them then they have of you." Charlie says, "They started it." Desmond says, "I am rubber you are glue." The pilot wakes up while Hugo is pretending to call his mom on the satellite phone. I guess being marooned on an Island must be boring after awhile. The pilot asks where she is, and Hugo confesses he doesn't know. Hugo asks her if she's there to rescue them and if there are more people with her and if she can make her phone work. She asks who he is. He introduces himself and says they are survivors of Flight 815. The pilot says that is impossible. Hurley says it wasn't easy, but they found a hatch with food. She says it's impossible because they found Oceanic Flight 815. They found the plane. There were no survivors. They were all dead. Hurley and I ask simultaneously, "What?" Mr. Conspiracy Theory is jumping up and down in glee. As for me, I'm too drunk to care. Which is just the way I like it.