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In Texas, as part of the apparent new plan, Carl, Danny and Dewey rendezvous with and collect their merch from some men presumably sent by Flores (in a truck via which they were able to transport the contraband); Carl then takes a tow truck (part of their new Hot Rod-provided cover) to head back to Kentucky with half the drugs while Dewey and Danny go in another with the other half. Meanwhile, Boyd, Jimmy and Darryl have already made it back to Harlan, and Boyd sends Jimmy out of the room so he can chat with Darryl alone – whereupon Darryl takes him by surprise by owning up to his double-cross with Hot Rod's men, saying he was just trying to increase his value to Boyd and "be part of the goddamn family." Of course, as I've mentioned before, Darryl hasn't met Wynn yet, and the man himself wonders to Boyd if he should find recent developments disturbing, while Picker is no more jazzed to hear the shipment is out of their control. Perhaps not surprisingly given that Dewey is involved, he and Danny get lost in a signal-free area on the way back to Harlan. Danny takes his frustration out on Dewey, but how will Dewey let out his bad feelings?
Raylan heads to Memphis to find out what's become of Hot Rod, given that some of his crew ended up dead in Mexico, and Raylan hooks up with a DEA agent named "Miller," an older tough who drinks while he practices at the shooting range and is played by Eric Roberts in almost-nerd glasses. They go to see Jay and Roscoe, with whom Miller is already familiar, who tell them they haven't seen Hot Rod in days, so Miller and Raylan leave a not-particularly-competent associate with the two criminals, who sees fit to blab the news about their crew having met their end in Mexico. Knowing that means the heroin's running loose, Jay and Roscoe subdue their captor – smartly not killing the federal agent, at least – and have a cohort beat Hot Rod up to try to get the heroin's current location. Hot Rod offers to draw him a map to Boyd's, but soon after, Raylan and Miller turn up to find the guy with a pencil stuck in his carotid artery and Hot Rod dying from a gutshot wound. He reminisces a bit with Miller – turns out Hot Rod was his CI for 15 years -- but passes on without giving up anything. For their part, Jay and Roscoe make it to Harlan and get the drop on Boyd's old miner friend who's watching the bar, and when Raylan and Miller subsequently arrive, the duct-taped miner tells them he sent them to Audrey's, where a summit meeting between Darryl, Boyd, Wynn, and Picker is in progress. Outside, Roscoe and Jay yet again get the better of the people on sentry duty – this time Jimmy and Mike – and when they get inside, Boyd has had just about enough of this day and invites everyone to have a firefight right there -- but Raylan and Miller's perfectly timed entrance defers that happening for the moment. Roscoe, proving that he only talks when he has something to say, rather amazingly quotes King Lear in requesting that Raylan allow he and Jay to finish their transaction and let them depart, but when he won't submit, Miller kills Roscoe, and it's only through supreme effort that Jay doesn't go to join his brother.
Boyd catches up with Ava, and she relays the cryptic message that he needs to take care of her friend the doctor; soon "Rowena" shows up to the bar (feels weird to call it "Johnny's" now) to tell Boyd he needs to give her a hundred grams of heroin once a week; she'll take a cut and pass the rest on. Boyd is startled that Ava is setting up to supply the prison, but the surprises aren't over, as Rowena tells Boyd she used to have a partner at the prison who was horribly murdered, and she wants him to exact vengeance on her behalf. Boyd dutifully goes to see the killer "Elmont Swain," who's in a nursing home but is still sufficiently with it to draw a gun; Boyd claims only to want to talk, so Swain tells him he killed the partner for supplying his inmate wife with the heroin that killed her. Despite being a dealer of such stuff himself, Boyd says he has no wish to kill an old man for perpetrating a righteous errand, so he offers to set him up for life someplace far away, only to turn around and have Jimmy kill him -- while in prison, Ava gets harassed by an addict starting to feel withdrawal -- but Judith grabs her, holds her blade up to her neck, and invites the woman to really cut her, which backs her down and impossibly elevates Judith's cred even higher. So when Rowena pulls a Darth Vader-esque "I am altering the deal" move and tells Ava she's also got to kill Judith, Ava's apprehension maybe is understandable?
Wrapping it up: Wendy promises Kendal that they'll be able to escape their kin as soon as she gets her cut of the Mexico operation. Darryl finds the money Raylan gave Kendal and repossesses it, and Wendy tells him they're leaving even as Darryl confesses he's planning to take Boyd, Wynn, and Picker out and take over the Kentucky business himself. With a case now open against Boyd and Wynn, Raylan officially postpones his vacation and goes into the office at night, catching only Art there. In rising frustration, Art tells Raylan his wife is right – Art's the crazy one if he thinks Raylan is ever going to change, so he's just going to ignore Raylan until his imminent retirement. And finally, on the way back to Memphis, Miller spies the tow truck with Hot Rod's name on it and makes a U-turn to chase Danny and Dewey, and Danny steps out and offers to try the twenty-one-foot rule out for real. Miller, maverick that he is, is game for the idea – but Dewey, stewing with a rage that's been building ever since he killed Wade, runs them both over with the truck. Miller's probably dead, but a bloody Danny watches menacingly as Dewey primal-screams his way up the highway and out of the episode. What now? I have no idea.
Want more? The full recap starts right below!Based on the chyron that reads "Somewhere in Texas near the Mexican border," we can conclude that Flores got Team Crowe-der safely across that dividing line and now -- after a customary shot of an armadillo in the foreground -- an eighteen-wheeler makes its way along a dirt road toward two tow trucks. Inside in one is Carl, while Danny and Dewey are in the other and get out to meet their delivery. Cut to Carl opening a crate in the back of the big truck with a crowbar and releasing a mess of fish -- chosen for their pungent smell, I'd imagine -- along with their bricks of heroin. Carl starts tossing them to the Crowes, and then we cut to the two of them hiding the drugs in the framework of the car attached to their truck as Danny complains that Dewey should really consider investing in some deodorant.
Dewey is chagrined to hear that he stinks, but Carl pops into frame to ask if "you girls" are ready. Danny: "About ready to kick your ass." I'm starting to think these two really should play some sex games to resolve this animosity. They finish putting the car's pieces back together, after which Carl sends the eighteen-wheeler's drivers on their way and then reminds the Crowes of their marching orders -- wait thirty minutes, then drive back to Harlan; no speeding, no highways, no drinking -- and if they get pulled over, they're just employees of "the HR Towing Company; you don't know shit about that cargo." So apparently they managed to hook up with Hot Rod's connection on this side of the border, which maybe doesn't seem like it should have been that easy with his guys on the Mexican side being dead at this crew's hands? Carl tells Dewey that his stinky ass can ride back to Kentucky with Danny, thanks, and after Carl hits the road, Danny's like, "Told you." For having started with him being awarded three hundred grand, this has not been the season for everything coming up Dewey, has it?
Back at the bar (as I said in the recaplet, it seems weird to call it "Johnny's" now, so "Boyd's" it is until further notice), Boyd pours shots for him and Darryl as Jimmy reports that Carl is on his way and the boys are close behind. Sitting on Boyd's desk, Darryl crows (sorry) about how it's going to be a great morning, but behind him, Boyd rolls his neck as well as his eyes in turning to Jimmy and saying he can take it from here. Knowing about Darryl's treachery, Jimmy hesitates but eventually withdraws, whereupon Darryl remarks that Jimmy's "a bit of a cold fish." That's not how the ladies at Audrey's tell it! Boyd corrects him that he's a tired fish, and stretches out to show his own weariness, which is not so strong that he doesn't think to surreptitiously draw his gun. Darryl, moving to the couch, tells Boyd he likes the way he handles himself, and he wants to come clean for the sake of their future relationship, but Boyd's like, I know this one -- Hot Rod's boys didn't actually pull. Darryl looks genuinely surprised, but Boyd goes on that it was awfully convenient that Darryl had a way over the border "all cocked and ready to go," and I give Boyd the benefit of the doubt that he was already suspicious, but isn't he going to give Jimmy credit for all that Rosetta Stone Spanish training he did?
Darryl smiles that Boyd doesn't miss a trick, and becomes as ingratiating as he can -- which is fairly hilarious to watch -- in saying that he and his kin were just trying to make themselves useful to Boyd. Boyd points out that he also made himself a liar (an idea that was driven home by Raylan as early as the season premiere), but Darryl wonders if Boyd can really claim to be an honest man. "That why you pointin' that gun at me from underneath that desk?" Now it's Boyd's turn to be impressed, and after he smiles big and puts the weapon out in plain sight, Darryl points out that lies aside, he and his kin did deliver. Boyd, however, counters that the heroin is not actually in Harlan Country yet, and Darryl admits that's true and "it would be a terrible shame if my brother Danny accidentally made a wrong turn in one of them trucks." Considerably less amused now, Boyd asks Darryl what he wants and Darryl gets to his feet: "I just want to be part of the goddamn family, Boyd." Boyd stares up at him, probably wondering how much of an allowance said entrance into the family will command.
Raylan's having a drink at a bar when an attractive young woman joins him and introduces herself as "Kayla." Hearing his, she supposes that their names sound a bit alike and gets him to buy her a drink, after which she asks what he's doing there and he tells her he's on vacation. This leads to talk about how she'd like to be lying on a beach somewhere, and this turns his thoughts to Miami, so he asks her if she were his new girlfriend if she'd find it weird to go with him to visit his baby daughter. Kayla's like, not at all; in fact, I'd go to Miami with you right now if you asked me. "My rate is normally a thousand dollars per day, but for you? Knock it down to five hundred." Not that you need to pay for it, Raylan, but the deep discount is actually pretty flattering! He just gives an embarrassed laugh before we cut to him getting into his car, and as rain pours down on his windshield, he makes a call as he flips through a file containing photos of dead dudes. He then tells the person who answers that he wants to book a flight, and I'd think the chances he's taking Kayla to Miami after all would be much greater if he hadn't given that spare cash away to Kendal. Credits.
And indeed, Raylan has traveled not to Miami but Memphis -- more specifically to the DEA office, in which some flunky leads him downstairs to the shooting gallery to "Miller," who apparently is the best person to lead Raylan to Hot Rod. Said Miller, as I mentioned in the recaplet, is played by Eric Roberts in a much less creepy performance than I generally expect from him. We quickly see that he's got a silver flask from which he liberally pulls, and I'd wonder about the wisdom of drinking and shooting if all his shots didn't hit his target dead center. Miller asks "Agent Henkins" what's up, so Henkins introduces Raylan, and Raylan and Miller have a little gun chat before Henkins pipes up that Raylan tells him some of Hot Rod's crew ended up dead in Mexico, which must have been what that file Raylan was looking at was all about. Miller thinks Hot Rod hasn't been over the border in years, but Raylan is pretty sure his evidence is sound, so Miller is like, I'll look into it kthanksbye. Raylan, however, says he'd like to tag along, but even though Miller seems amused to hear that Raylan is on vacation and drawls that he came "to kick the hornet's nest," he tells him he can't help. However, Raylan merely smiles and lists the numerous other government agencies he's going to go to with the tip, so Miller's like FINE, but I'm driving, and Henkins you can even come too if you ride bitch in the back. Okay, not really, but the tone's pretty close?
Boyd's already waiting at the phone bank when Ava is escorted out to see him, and they smile tentatively at each other before they pick up and Boyd talks about what a sight she is for his "weary eyes" and how she should have been wearing her hair like this all along. Ava's happy to see him, but her smile fades as she supposes he's been busy, and when he talks about their future, she raises an eyebrow, as well she might. He assures her, though, that he's going to get her out, and she nods but tells him she needs a favor -- her "friend" is in trouble, and when she finds Boyd, Ava needs him to do whatever the woman asks. Boyd agrees, but is surprised when Ava curtly tells him to let her know when it's done and then withdraws without looking back, and I'm sorry, Boyd, but if I were in prison for nine episodes and counting I wouldn't have much stomach for conversation either.
At Audrey's, Wendy finds Kendal experimenting with mixing cocktails, and he thinks she's going to yell at him, but she tells him she'd actually like to try one, thanks. After taking a sip, she approvingly says it's pretty good and wonders if he has a name for it, and he's like yeah -- I call it a "This Place Sucks." Sorry, Kendal, but if you want bars to list it on their menus I think you're going to have to be more marketing-savvy. Wendy assures him that his brothers ("You mean my uncles?" Kendal retorts) are working on something that's going to bring in tons of cash, after which she'll get her cut and the two of them will be able to leave. Kendal calls bullshit, but Wendy promises that after one week, he'll never have to see the rest of his kin if he doesn't want to. For right now, though, Darryl comes wandering in, explaining that he got back late the night before announcing that the operation went "smooth like a stripper's ass," and I was going to remark on how lovely that comment is until I realized how much worse he could have done. Wendy sends Kendal to get Darryl some food before asking Darryl if it really went well, and he reminds her that she didn't want all the details, but essentially promises that they're all about to become legit rich, not just swamp rich.
Wynn, daintily fixing up his cup of coffee, is on the phone with Boyd wondering if the Mexican near-fiasco and the fact that they have new partners are as worrisome as he thinks. After taking a sip and making a face, he sighs into the phone that it doesn't sound like they have much choice before getting off his cell and picking up the landline. Picker seethes that now they have to agree to "this new gang of idiots' terms," but Wynn is busy ordering another pot of coffee for the reason that "this one tastes like my ass on Sunday. Thank you, dear!" Hee. Wynn assures Picker that they'll go to Harlan and play nice, and everything will be fine. "Get some rest. That place can be exhausting." And he doesn't even have to recap it!
In the car, Raylan explains that Hot Rod "has been branching out" and linked up with some Kentucky folk, and Miller wonders why Raylan felt the need to investigate the connection on his vacation. Raylan, checking out a car close behind that I assume is carrying Henkins, says he was packed for Florida to see his baby girl, and hearing that Raylan has a kid, Miller dryly asks, "What'd you go and do that for?" Raylan doesn't look particularly amused, but you have to admit it's a reasonable question.
The three agents reach a warehouse, and after making their way through a maze of boxes, they find Roscoe and Jay, the latter of whom is amused to see the pairing in front of him, as in addition to Raylan (whom he calls "Kentucky") he already, not surprisingly, is familiar with Miller. Miller evenly says that Raylan wants to talk to Hot Rod, but Jay is like, so do we -- they haven't seen him in days, so maybe Miller and Raylan should keep up the "constabulatin'" and find him themselves. Miller and Raylan give this a two-state call of bullshit, so they leave Henkins to watch "these assholes" and make sure they don't warn Hot Rod. Henkins looks exasperated that he's gotten stuck with shit detail, but given that it looks like this has happened many times before, this has "shame on him" written all over it.
The doctor, or Ava's "friend," comes into the bar looking for Boyd, and the guy Boyd has on sentry/bartending duty in everyone else's absence overacts his contention that he never heard of him, which might be why the woman's like look, whatever your game is, I'm tied to his lady and he'll want to see me. This gets Boyd to emerge and tell "Caleb" it's all right before explaining he knows Caleb from the mines. "A man spends that much time in the dark, customer service ain't one of his strong suits." Logical! The woman finally introduces herself as "Rowena" and claims she's come well out of her way, so Boyd invites her to sit and state her needs. She tells him that she'll need a hundred grams a week, as pure as possible, and after she takes a cut she'll pass the rest on to Ava. Boyd maybe was not expecting to hear that Ava wants heroin, and Rowena explains that Ava's looking to take care of herself, "but first you gotta take care of me." She tells him that she once had a partner, "woman named Vernon," who worked with her at the jail and helped her bring stuff inside -- until a man murdered her by setting fire to her house in the dead of night and letting her burn. "You gonna get me my retribution." Boyd makes a face like he feels a migraine coming on, so Rowena starts to go on that she knows it's a difficult ask, but Boyd's like, it isn't so much that -- I can get behind righteous revenge. "It just bothers me that I don't know you, and you know a hell of a lot more about what my fiancée's doin' than I do." Good instinct, but Rowena evenly counters that this is the price of Ava's safety and the expression on Boyd's face is dangerous, but like Wynn earlier he looks like he realizes he doesn't have much choice.
Roscoe and Jay, sitting on the couch with their hands cuffed behind them, are needling Henkins about his relative worth, and when they keep up the string of insults, Henkins tries to shoot back that he supposes they're upset because half their crew died in Mexico. He goes on to laugh that they were found in a truck with traces of heroin and to suppose that Roscoe and Jay were probably expecting that haul to come their way. It's a good comeback, and it's not like he's wrong, but this only has the effect of prompting Jay to tell Roscoe that it's "now or never time" before proposing they do the "hammer and anvil," and Roscoe grimly agrees. They get to their feet, and Henkins nervously tells them to sit back down, but it's evident that he has no command authority here and it's only seconds of his ineffective threats and coverage before Roscoe mercifully head-butts him with Jay crowing "Down goes Frasier, baby!" Hee. I mean, I don't really see the resemblance, but it's still funny.
When we return, Roscoe and Jay have gotten themselves out of the cuffs with Henkins' keys, and Jay tells the crony of his who's guarding Hot Rod to get information on where Boyd is. They're also leaving Henkins chained up but alive, which I guess isn't surprising; outside of the fact that killing a Federal agent is no joke, it's also far more humiliating for Henkins this way. The crony, for his part, clocks Hot Rod in the face, and when Hot Rod points out that he's been in the guy's custody for the whole Mexican operation and as such has no idea where Boyd is, the guy concedes nothing: "Where he at?" Hot Rod desperately tells him Boyd has a bar and offers to draw him a map, as it's impossible to find anything in Harlan without one. It seems like an obvious ruse, but the rest of this episode will illustrate the dangers of relying on GPS.
Raylan and Miller pull up outside, and Raylan -- seeing the tow trucks -- offers that he didn't know Hot Rod was a legitimate businessman. Miller replies that it's just a way to move his dope; he puts it in the car the truck is towing, which gives him deniability should the law discover it (which explains what Carl told Danny about feigning surprise should that happen to him). Interrupting their discussion, however, is the sound of shots fired from within, and when the agents move in with weapons drawn, they see Roscoe and Jay's associate bleeding from the pencil sticking out of his carotid artery. I've always liked to keep my pencils sharp, but now I can see there may be downsides.
The henchman falls to the ground dead, dropping his gun in the process, but as Miller soon finds with a sigh of "Oh, shit," he got his revenge -- Hot Rod is sitting up against a car with a gunshot wound that does not look good. Hot Rod remarks that it's just like Miller to show up two minutes late, and as Raylan pulls out his phone to call for medical help, Hot Rod asks what he's doing there, so Raylan tells him Johnny and half his crew turned up dead in Mexico. Hot Rod asks if Miller's got his flask, and Miller hands the old silver thing over, with Hot Rod remarking that he's had "this piece of shit" ever since he's known him. Hot Rod drinks and laughs that it's "cheap shit," and Miller shows there's some real history by chuckling that an old dog like him isn't likely to complain. After Hot Rod grimaces some more, he recalls a time when he gave Miller a tip that turned out to be a DEA sting. "You didn't even know what your own office was doing." Sounds like in the past Miller maybe hasn't been much for proper procedure, which might mean that Raylan has the chance to be the responsible one in the partnership. Miller admits that he almost lost his job, and he and Raylan tentatively smile, but that doesn't last when they see that Hot Rod has passed on. As sirens approach, Miller takes his flask back and sighs, "Oh, hell." That pretty much sums it up.
In what looks like a nursing home, Boyd knocks on the open door of one of the rooms and asks the old-ish man lying in the bed within if he's "Elmont Swain." Swain replies by pulling a gun from behind his pillow and asking if "she" sent him, and Boyd replies by shutting the door and saying he's just there to talk. And talk they do, with Boyd telling him Rowena claims Swain killed her partner (didn't think of it before, but that kind of partner?), and Swain replying that the junk the two of them brought into the prison killed his wife -- she was just in the clink for check fraud, but got hooked on the drugs and OD'd. Boyd expresses sympathy and seems to mean it, and Swain goes on that he's got a bad heart and liver and as such isn't long for this world, "but if you want to send me to her, you gonna have to draw." Boyd, however, takes a seat and tells Swain that "killin' an old man in a nursing home bed ain't on my bucket list," but he does have a job to do, so how about if he pays Swain to disappear somewhere far away for the rest of his days and live like a king? Swain asks how much money Boyd is offering and we don't hear the answer, but I'm pretty sure Boyd's capable of guessing what number it's going to take to get to yes.
As Hot Rod's corpse is loaded into a coroner's van, Miller reports that Henkins is okay with an added "I don't really give a shit, but I guess it's good news." Hee. Raylan is still stuck on the fact that Hot Rod was Miller's CI, and Miller confirms that that was the case for the better part of fifteen years -- Hot Rod tipped him to his competition, and in return Miller let him run his operation. That further explains why Hot Rod was so content in the weed business; even a maverick like Miller wouldn't have turned a blind eye to harder drugs. Miller then asks Raylan if he's got an idea where to find Boyd, since that's apparently who Roscoe and Jay are heading for, and Raylan admits that he might, so they start on the road to find Boyd -- who, as it happens, is just heading out of the nursing home as he asks Carl what his ETA is. Carl tells him two hours, "but I lost track of those idiots Danny and Dewey. Can't get 'em on their cells." Boyd tells him to keep trying, but that's not going to be availing, as right now Dewey can't get a cell or a GPS signal and doesn't know how to get them home without using the highways. Danny berates him, not just for claiming he knew the roads like the back of his hand but for stinking "like my ball sack," but the noisome odor doesn't stop Danny from grabbing Dewey by the collar and adding that they're carrying enough heroin to put them away for two lifetimes, so Dewey JUST MIGHT want to get the GPS working. Dewey says he hears him, so Danny starts the car again, but his dismissive addition of "simple piece of shit" looks like it hurts Dewey quite a bit. Of course, he's seemed to get along with Danny better than anyone else in the family, so there's that, as weird as it is to say.
Caleb's reading the paper when Roscoe and Jay enter. They order double Maker's, and Roscoe sits at the bar while Jay plays something on the jukebox -- but then he quickly locks the door. Caleb goes for his gun, but Roscoe's there to grab it away and hold Caleb's head on the bar while Caleb hilariously yells that there's no need to get rough. Jay tells him they're looking for Boyd, and Roscoe menaces Caleb by sticking a gun in his mouth, but Jay easily tells him to take it out so he can talk. Caleb admits that he knows Boyd, so Jay, trading his calm tone for a heated one, informs him that Boyd killed his crew and took his drugs, so this is what's happening: He's going to let the song on the jukebox play out, and when the end comes, Caleb will tell him where to find Boyd or he's going to die. Caleb starts to protest that Boyd isn't there, but Jay shushes him: "Song ain't over yet." I think Jay knows what he's doing, because Caleb sure doesn't look equipped to handle this much tension for another two minutes.
Ava's reading on her bunk when a hack approaches; she hops down and the guard tells her she's scheduled for a hep B shot, so she needs to check into the infirmary before lights out. Ava smirks at her plan coming together, but her amusement fades in a hurry when a woman with pink-and-blonde bangs and a druggie attitude, having heard Ava's name, recognizes her as the one who screwed up their heroin supply. Ava breathes that she's working on it, but the woman draws a blade and seems pretty set on leaving a mark Ava will never forget -- until Judith appears, walking slowly toward them and tells her it's time to back off. Withdrawal Girl spits that Judith can keep her "goddess bullshit" to herself, but Judith tells her cutting Ava or her won't help -- and she grabs Withdrawal Girl's hand, holds the blade up to her own neck and hisses, "You want to cut me, really cut me. Don't do this half-assed bullshit to make yourself feel bigger and better." She tells her to deal with her inner turmoil and that she doesn't want an external conflict, "but if you want that real fight, we can always arrange it. You just say where and when." Everyone is staring, as well you'd expect, but when Judith releases Withdrawal Girl's hand, she slinks away. Damn Ava, it's sure lucky Judith's on your side, right?
After a close-up of two whiskey shots on the bar, one mostly-drunk, Raylan and Miller enter Boyd's, and after Miller takes the opportunity to refill his flask from the Maker's bottle, he calls Raylan to look behind the bar -- Caleb is there, trussed up like a turkey and unconscious, but alive. Raylan steps around and taps him with his boot before ripping the duct tape off his mouth, and Caleb is like OW and "those assholes shot to my ear" so he can't hear and he didn't sign up for this shit and OW some more, but he does eventually give up that Boyd is at Audrey's. Raylan and Miller then leave him without even loosening his bonds, which is cold, but all things considered Caleb should be pretty happy with his lot if he gives it some thought.
At Audrey's, a negotiation is in progress between Wynn, Picker, Boyd and Darryl, the last of whom says the Crowes want to be responsible for transporting the others' heroin across state lines in exchange for twenty percent of the pie. Wynn, after trying to throw Darryl off with a couple "That's it?" questions, says he'd like to know one thing: "Where are our drugs?" Boyd pipes up that Carl's truck has arrived, so I guess they've got half the shipment, but when Darryl tries to say that the other one will be there soon, Wynn wonders if maybe the negotiations are premature. Picker, however, is willing to say right now that twenty percent is too much, and when Darryl asks what he thinks would be fair "for this kind of specialized labor," Wynn shoots ten back at him. Picker adds that said percentage would be taken from what they deliver, not what they leave Mexico with. He goes on how with all the partners they have, Darryl's proposed piece would be disproportionate, but Darryl -- with that faux-confused-hick look he does so well -- points out that if they can't find someone to get their stuff across the border, they're going to be splitting "exactly jack shit." Good one, Darryl! Now tell them about your prison business classes!
Outside, Jimmy and Mike are standing guard when who should come navigating through all the laundry on the lines but Jay, who asks if he's at "Audrey's Famous Whorehouse." Jimmy tells him he is -- and he's got some pride in his voice, which is hilarious -- but as it happens, they're closed. Jay jokes around a bit but tries to push his way in, and Jimmy tells him to back off or they're going to have a problem, but then Roscoe appears to the side and cocks two guns for the price of one, allowing Jay to gloat that Jimmy and Mike are the ones with the problem before telling Roscoe to say hi. Roscoe: "Hi." Excellent.
Inside, Boyd is sensibly trying to push a fifteen percent compromise -- given that it's halfway between ten and twenty, it does have a certain appeal -- but when Jimmy and Mike appear, followed by the armed Jay and Roscoe, negotiations cease and Boyd looks incredibly irritated with the way this day is going; as a testament to that, after some introductory remarks, he bites out that after everything that's happened recently, he supposes the two of them are there for drugs or money, or maybe revenge? Jay likes that they're getting down to business, but assures Boyd he can keep the revenge -- he will accept either the drugs or the money, though. "I'll even let you pick which." Boyd, however, takes back control of the room with that grandstanding voice he does so well, which only climbs in volume as he asks his partners what they should part with -- half a million? A million? All the drugs? Jay counsels Boyd not to ruin how well they were just getting along with his undiluted sarcasm, but Boyd's in full flight now and goes on that he could even offer Jay and Roscoe a job -- all they have to do is kill Darryl and agree to ten percent, "and you can become our new smugglers!"
Darryl starts to protest, but it doesn't seem like this suggestion was any more serious than the others (although with access to Hot Rod's infrastructure Jay and Roscoe could probably make a go of it), for Boyd stands and goes one further by suggesting they just all draw right there and resolve everything when the smoke clears. Darryl starts to say he'll take ten percent after all, but Boyd tells him he missed his chance and if he's not serious about invoking a firefight he's doing an awfully good job of pretending. Raylan's voice then rings out behind Jay as he asks Miller if he'd call this "a herd, a gaggle, or a flock-a assholes." Miller thinks that it's in fact the United Nations of Assholes, which is pretty witty given how far-flung the participants' places of origin are. Boyd asks if he might be excused, but Raylan tells him that no, he most certainly may not before informing Roscoe and Jay that he's going to need them to put down their weapons. Roscoe, however, tells Raylan "reason, not the need," and when Raylan doesn't catch the reference, he explains that it's from King Lear, who split his kingdom in half and gave it to his daughters Goneril and Regan in exchange for a hundred knights, but they reneged on the deal and took them away.
Roscoe goes on that in the analogy: he and Jay are Lear and they want what's rightfully theirs from the rest of the group there, who are "the bitches." He doesn't go into the deeper point of the quote, but you can read both the original and modern text, which are fairly explicit, here; in any case, the meaning in the play doesn't have that much to do with the episode, but the quote does serve as a framework for the several instances of betrayal that are yet to happen. Anyway, Roscoe's claim that they just want what's rightfully theirs holds no water with either Raylan or Miller, and when Roscoe presses the point, saying Miller knows better than to push them, Miller shoots him dead without a second warning. Jay cries out, but Miller announces to Jay that his brother threatened a DEA officer, and if he doesn't put his weapon down he'll meet the same fate. As everyone watches tensely, Jay breathes raggedly -- perhaps this part where he's almost reduced to an animal is more what the Lear reference is about than I realized -- but he finally complies, sending us to commercial. Well, at least Roscoe got in a year's quota of words before he bit it.
As Jay is put into a police car, Miller -- after making love to his flask again -- asks Raylan what now, but Raylan just wants to head to Lexington and get back to his vacation. Miller says he does that sometimes to see his kids, and Raylan's like wait, I thought you didn't have any? Miller grins that he never said that, and Raylan smiles before telling him to take it easy and heading off.
Boyd takes a look in his rearview mirror before apologizing to Swain, who's in the passenger seat with Jimmy in the back for running late, as getting arrested wasn't part of the original plan. Swain warns Boyd that he's still got his gun in case he's tempted to try anything, but Boyd tells him to relax as he's on Easy Street now. However, he then pulls the truck over and says he's going for a piss and come on, Swain, you can't trust a situation where someone's behind you in the car! Didn't you see Goodfellas? To ease Swain's mind, Jimmy hands him a wad of bills, but no sooner is Boyd out of the car than does Jimmy wrap a cord around Swain's neck. Boyd looks none too happy with himself as Swain chokes out, but he soon makes a call: "It's done." That's what you think!
In one of the trailers at Audrey's, Kendal and Wendy are playing cards when he asks her what they're doing there. She sighs that they're waiting for Darryl to make bail, but that's not what he means, so she reminds him they just need to stay put for another couple days. Just then, Darryl turns up, and after he complains about the universal stupidity of cops, he asks what they're playing -- double solitaire -- and if they have another deck, to which Kendal says no. Darryl looks in one of Kendal's drawers, and Kendal tries to get him to stop, but Kendal trying to physically prevent Darryl from doing something makes David and Goliath seem about evenly matched. Soon Darryl is fishing out the envelope containing the cash Raylan gifted to Kendal. Darryl wants to know how he got it, so Kendal, thinking fast, tells him he stole it from a bunch of johns. I kind of thought Darryl would be proud of that one, but he's actually annoyed and says he's keeping the money, so Kendal stomps off despite Darryl yelling after him.
Darryl then asks what's wrong with him, and when Wendy supposes he's looking for a way out, Darryl doesn't want to hear that. Wendy, however, tells him they both want to be gone, so he berates her for being stupid, saying that he knows the pipeline and the players now and after he kills "three people," the Crowes will take over the entire heroin business. So he's gunning for Wynn, Boyd and Picker. Darryl, I won't begrudge you that last, but if you take aim at those first two I'm going to have to insist that you die. For her part, Wendy says she doesn't want any of his grand dreams, just to get her hands on her cut of what they've already got coming so she can leave. She walks out, leaving Darryl to kick the dresser impotently, because even he probably knows he can't do this without her.
Ava comes in to see Rowena and when they're safely alone, Rowena says Boyd did real well with that errand, but she needs one more thing. Ava reminds her they had a deal, but Rowena's like, funny thing about our relative positions -- "you don't got any leverage." Rather than point out that she could conceivably point her murderous fiancé at Rowena, Ava wonders if her shady business practices are why she didn't want Judith in on the plan, but Rowena tells her she's got it wrong -- the deal is still good if she does one more thing. Boyd helped her on the outside, and now Ava needs to help her on the inside -- by killing Judith or "Mother Superior" as she calls her. Ava can't believe her ears, but Rowena is quite clear: "You want yo' shit, you gotta kill Judith." Ava, I know you said you don't have use for it, but I'd still start praying if I were you.
It's late, and Art's the only one in the office when Raylan turns up. Art -- riding a wave of already-exasperated breathing -- comes out and says he already got a call from the Memphis DEA office thanking his own office for their assistance, but points out that filing reports while on vacation violates their employment guidelines. Raylan tries to say the vacation was postponed, but Art sardonically corrects him that he can't go on vacation because he's a workin' man, right? Raylan tries to rise above Art's disparaging tone as he points out that finding Wynn, Boyd and the Crowes together might actually be significant, but Art snits that the DEA has already asked for Raylan's assistance, so he's going to keep him on the case. "Congratulations. You win again."
Raylan, apparently amused, chuckles that Art says that like it's a bad thing, so Art turns back and admits that his wife is right -- he's the crazy one for holding out hope that Raylan's ever going to change. "You're still the same guy they kicked up here from Florida. I tell you what to do, you do whatever the hell you want, somehow it all works out and I'm the dumbass losin' sleep over it." I mean, that's a simplified version, but it's also hard to deny. Raylan, dropping the smile, reminds Art that he asked him to make a choice, but Art tells him he's not going to do that -- he's got a week and a half left, so he's going to enjoy it. Uh oh. I know the show has resisted this temptation before, but if there's anything that might make Raylan reevaluate his life going into the final season, it's having Art die while like permanently mad at him. Art ends with saying he's going to go back to ignoring Raylan -- or as he puts it, "you're not even here" -- and Raylan's request that they get down to their issues and try to resolve them is denied. Art takes off, and Raylan looks like filing that report isn't going to be as fun as he was expecting.
Someone who's not so worried about what his superiors may think is Miller, who's driving back to Memphis at night on the highway when what should he spot going the other way but a Hot Rod tow truck. He makes a U-turn, while in the truck, Danny is telling Dewey how cocaine is routinely cut with baby laxative when he sees Miller's headlights rapidly approaching. Dewey berates Danny for taking the highway (which to be fair is one lane in both directions, so I'm not sure how effective back roads would be), but Danny tells him to shut up before Miller pulls to a stop in front of them, gets out of his car, and brandishes his gun as he identifies himself as DEA and tells them to show them their hands. Danny's hand, however, goes not up but down to his leather sheath as he asks Dewey how far he thinks they are from the car. Dewey doesn't provide a helpful answer, but that doesn't stop Danny from getting out and affably asking if there's a problem.
In an equally genial tone, Miller replies that there won't be as soon as Danny assumes the position, but Danny draws his knife and asks if he's ever heard of the twenty-one-foot rule. As Dewey eyes the keys Danny left in the ignition, Miller tells Danny that he is in fact familiar: "Of all the harmful, epic bullshit on the Internet, the twenty-one-foot rule's at the top of the list, pal." I don't deny it, but I do wonder if that's where Danny actually heard about it. Dewey surreptitiously slides over into the driver's seat as Miller accepts Danny's challenge and holsters his gun -- but before Danny can rush him, Dewey fires up the engine and rolls forward. He knocks Danny to the side, whereupon Miller lets fly a couple shots through the windshield, but Dewey ducks and hits Miller full on before driving away. I think Miller's probably dead -- the increased velocity with which Dewey hit him alone was probably sufficient for that -- but Danny's still very much alive as he watches Dewey go. Dewey lets loose a primal scream of rage before we cut to black, and I have to hand it to that wild-card ending, because I have no idea what's coming now. See you week.
John Ramos is a writer and film producer living in Los Angeles. His new film, a documentary on online privacy and the exploitation of personal data called Terms And Conditions May Apply, a New York Times Critics' Pick, is now on iTunes here. You can get news on it from the film's Twitter accountor website, or check out trackoff.us to learn how to protect your privacy. Also, you can email John at couchbaron@gmail.com, follow him on Twitter at https://twitter.com/couchbaron, or check out his blog, "Pull Up A Chair," which he'd just love for you to stop by.