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Finally, an episode that's a little lighter on the Kleenex. The plots, in reverse letter order: Kevin runs into Beth when she shows up to give her deposition in the matter of the lawsuit. The experience stirs emotions in both of them, and we certainly haven't seen the last of her. Will questions one of Judith's friends that was there the night she was killed, but he's completely uncooperative, due to his fear of getting busted for his part in the pursuit of Ecstasy. Lucyfer employs some highly unethical tactics in getting the kid to crack, and when Helen hears about them from a completely unbothered and rah-rah-Lucyfer Will, she wonders whom her husband is turning into. I fear we don't want to know, but we're going to find out anyway. Joan's still having trouble dealing with Judith's death, so at God's urging, she helps Grace with the latter's bat mitzvah. Grace has put it off many times, mostly due to her alcoholic mother, whom we finally meet in the form of Mary Mara, who's a pretty darn good choice for the role. When Joan discovers the truth about Grace's mom's alcoholism, Grace freaks and tries to cancel again, but Joan, armed with knowledge culled from Judaism For Dummies (no, really), tells Grace to stand up and declare herself. Grace relents. Her mom promises to behave at the ceremony, and perhaps against primetime odds, she keeps her word, so the whole thing goes off without a hitch. Grace gives a short but stirring speech about faith, and that, combined with another conversation with God, makes Joan realize she's got to accept Judith's death. She also kind of sort of hints that she may soon be telling Adam that she's still talking to God. In other news, Friedman utters the words "Kama Sutra," and I know we're liking him a lot more these days, but still? Ew. Also, Joan wears a really long scarf, Glynis trades in her chirpiness for bitterness, which, hee, we see Grace in the chair (in a DRESS!), like, aw, and Luke and Grace's bond grows deeper while watching a meteor shower, like, AW. Hey, I said it was lighter, not Kleenex-free. Oh, and Glynis gives Deborah an enormous shout-out, but I'll let her tell you about that. Want more? The full recap starts right below!
Shout-out to OhTara.
Joan, Adam and Grace are reading a poster at school offering counselling (courtesy of Stuart Dingle, MSW) to students troubled by Judith's murder (or "tragic death," as they put it here). Some brain trust has seen fit to attach a little addendum, reminding students to wear school colours to support the Eagles on Spirit Day. Joan angrily snatches the poster down: "How lame is this?" Grace sneers: "Yeah. Like eagles are ever blue." Joan seems more upset about the grief counseling. Adam says the school has to do it. Grace: "They're covering their asses in a litigious society. Someone could freak out and sue the school." I'd like to interject a remark here about how ridiculous this suggestion is, but…you know. Joan: "Oh, and Dingle's going to calm them down? That comb-over alone could trigger a mass suicide." There's someone walking behind them in the halls wearing a very weird mask over his or her head, kind of a skeleton face with stiff freaky hair. I don't know what's with the weird masks on this show. Adam says that talking about it might help. Joan is impatient: "Hey, I'm the brainchild of Dr. Dan, remember? Sitting in a room and crying with Dingle is not going to help. You show me someone with the answers, I'm there, but this?" She crumples the poster up and tosses it. As they come down the stairs toward their lockers, Grace ventures, "So Saturday, uh…I have this thing on Saturday with uh, food and crap and you guys can come if you want to but you don't have to, I don't care." What a felicitous invitation. Living up to the graciousness implied by her name, as always. Joan: "Could you be any less specific?" Grace explains it's her bat mitzvah. Joan and Adam are speechless, then on the verge of sniggering. Grace warns them, "Do not start with me! The Jews have been making kids do this for thousands of years. You got problems, ask Maimonides." Joan and Adam struggle to suppress their smirking. Grace: "And wipe that smirk off your face, Rove!" Adam says, "You know, you've been putting it off for years. Are you really gonna go through with it this time?" Grace rummages in her bag as she replies, "Do I look like I wanna discuss this?" Adam: "No." She hands them two vandalized invitations, explaining she ripped off the baby pictures: "Parents are sadists." She gives them an uncomfortable grimace and wanders off.
Adam tells Joan he thinks they should go. Joan: "Like I wouldn't go to Grace's bat mitzvah?" Adam meant the grief counselling. He thinks it would help to talk about it: "I mean, I'm having trouble coming to sense with it." Joan apologizes for jumping all over him, but says that constantly rehashing it just keeps it too fresh in her mind: "Without some kind of 'why,' it's just going to drive me crazy. I can't. I'm sorry." Adam: "Sure." The bell rings and she kisses him, saying she has to go: "Can't be late for French. Gotta keep my…D average." Adam calls after her, "Hey, do you think your grades are tanking because…" Joan pleads, "Please, don't. Just don't." Adam wearily leans his head against the locker.
Joan wanders through the hall as some girl is putting up another one of the Grief Counselling/Spirit Day posters. She complains as Joan passes, "Someone keeps ripping these down." Joan doesn't miss a beat: "Oh, Snippy God. Well, I don't need to go whine." "Snippy God," who's dressed like she goes to a Catholic girls' school, and is played by Christy Carlson Romano -- someone I've never seen before, although I wouldn't admit it to my Kim Possible-worshipping five-year-old niece -- says, "Other people might." I'm just going to go with the official script name for this avatar: "Officious Hall Monitor God." Even though it's really long and annoying to type. She reminds me ever so vaguely of Jennifer Love Hewitt. Sort of like what you'd get if you crossed "Love" with Kimberly McCullough. Apparently she and Christopher Marquette went to his homecoming dance together in 1999. Joan suggests a Q&A session: "'Ask the Almighty.' I'd show up for that one." So would I. Officious Hall Monitor God says, "You want to know why she died, why it had to be Judith." Joan: "Uh, yeah. You wanted me to live in the present, but you know what? Here in the present, Judith's death is with me all the time." Officious Hall Monitor God takes the bat mitzvah invitation out of Joan's hand and says, "I wish you could have seen the baby picture, Joan. Adorable! She had these little chubby cheeks…" She puffs out her cheeks to illustrate. Joan: "Could we focus?" Officious Hall Monitor God claims, "I'm always focused. Grace seems a little scattered, though. You should help her get through this." Joan sighs: "It's a Jewish thing, okay? I'm not really the point person for Jewish." Officious Hall Monitor God: "Help her, Joan." She wanders off with a weird backward Godwave as Joan calls out, "Hey…what -- what about Judith?"
Joan goes straight to Grace's locker and tells Grace, "If you want any help with your mitzvah thing…" Grace makes a sound of horror as she slams her locker and tells Joan to just stay out of her face: "It's enough of a nightmare as it is." She takes off, leaving Joan standing there blinking. Theme song.
Will is questioning Judith's stupid friend Ryan about his recollection of her stabbing. Ryan's got a lawyer there. I'm going to try to make this brief, because the police stuff is wearing on me, and also? Ten episodes in a row already. I'm tired, people. Will says they know Ryan witnessed the stabbing and isn't the one who did it. He pressures him for a name or description. Ryan can't remember anything. His lawyer also insists he never admitted to buying any drugs. Will gets irritated with her constant intrusions. Will tries to guilt-trip Ryan but the kid keeps working the Alzheimer defense. His lawyer calls an end to the interrogation. Lucyfer's watching all this through the window. She and Will glance at each other just as she takes off, leading with her jaw. It's the Head Tilt of I'm Damn Well Gonna Fix This, Because I'm Beelzebub And I Can.
Will follows Ryan and his lawyer out into the main office area to ask if he can speak with her for a moment. She tells Ryan to wait for her downstairs. After he trots off, Will tries to apply pressure to his lawyer, whose name is Catherine, saying he's not into busting Ryan on a little drug charge. She says he's scared and his parents want her to protect him. Will: "Guilt-trip." Catherine: "Predictable excuse." Will: "More personally relevant guilt-trip." Catherine: "Ineffectual warning." Will: "Pressure, guilt, pressure." Catherine: "Polite suggestion." Will: "Last-ditch attempt at guilt." Catherine: "Unconvincing expression of support." She takes off.
Grace is wandering through the halls, lost in her anxieties, when Luke runs into her and asks what he can do for her bat mitzvah. She replies, "Nothing. I just want it to come and go quickly. Like Hoobastank." Ha! Friedman and Glynis are catching up behind him. Friedman advises her, "Savour it, Marge. I tell you, when the hora starts, you're up in that chair…now that's a rush." Glynis: "But don't crowd surf. The elderly aren't prepared for it." The chair? Isn't that more a wedding thing? Is that done at bar/bat mitzvoth? Glynis is wearing an outfit I could swear one of my Barbies had in 1974: A white blouse with a Peter Pan collar, black sweater vest, and a red plaid skirt with a matching red plaid tie. It wasn't my favourite Barbie outfit then and it still isn't. Are ties in for girls now? Because Officious Hall Monitor God was wearing one, too, and I don't care for them. Not something I want to look at for a couple of seasons. Grace sighs, "Look, just come to my stupid party, laugh at the chocolate fountain, make fun of my relatives, and if you're good maybe we can make out behind the DJ booth." I thought she was talking to all of them, but now it's clear she just means Luke. Friedman leans forward to comment, "Sweet." Grace: "Shut up, Friedman!" Luke: "I'm just saying, if you need anything…" Grace: "No, I'm serious, dude, please -- just leave me alone, and no one gets hurt." She disappears into the classroom. Glynis comments, "You wanted someone more emotionally complex. Enjoy." She flounces into the classroom too. He did? When was that? Luke and Friedman stand there for a moment, puzzling over girls. Then Friedman asks Luke what he got Grace for her bat mitzvah. Luke says she told him not to get her anything: "I thought it was like a religious thing." Friedman snorts a little, throwing his arm around Luke's shoulder: "Rabbi Friedman will guide the goyim." G-d help the goyim, or at least, just this one poor goy.
Kevin runs into Beth at the courthouse again. She seems to have been waiting for him. Beth tells him she was told he'd be there. Kevin: "Another brush with the law, Miss Reinhart?" She tells him she's being deposed by Andy's attorney: "I have to talk about what happened the night of the accident." Kevin says he's sorry. Beth: "No partygoer left behind, huh?" She asks what she should say. Kevin tells her to just state what happened. Beth: "But I remember --" Kevin: "That you saw how hammered he was, and that I let him drive anyway." Beth: "It's not that simple, Kevin, you know that. If I make a mistake…things are hard enough for you." Kevin: "You don't have to lie for me, Beth. I'll be fine." He wheels on into the courtroom as she sighs and leaves. I don't think I'm entirely sure what that was all about. I don't see how any of Beth's evidence incriminates Kevin in any way. Do you think there could be something they're not telling us?
Grace is at a vending machine at school when Joan zooms up and says, "Grace! I think it is so cool that you are having this big party and everything. Did you know once I had a moon bounce when I was, like, three years old, and this kid jumped, like, eight feet up in the air and came down on my arm. I was in a cast for a month!" What is she on all of sudden? By this point Grace has given up struggling with the vending machine and hustled away from Joan, who's hot on her heels. Grace: "You're babbling!" She sure is. What the hell was all that supposed to be about? Joan: "I'm just excited about your mitzvah, because it's going to be better than breaking your arm because I'm gonna help!" Suddenly Helen calls Grace's name from the door of her classroom, and Grace stops and turns. Helen's heard about her bat mitzvah: "Congratulations, or mazel tov -- did I say it right?" Grace smiles tightly and replies, "Like a native." Helen adds, "So if there's anything I can do…" Joan: "There isn't. I'm helping." Helen tells Grace: "You might consider making nicer friends." She goes back into her classroom as Grace wonders, "What is with you people? The Jews have survived five thousand years of persecution, but we're finally going to get finished off by the Girardis!" The words you're looking for, Grace, are "Oy gevalt!" Joan wonders if something's wrong. Grace: "Yeah! You -- you all want to help. You think I can't get through this because of the blatant materialism of post-industrial society which has totally corrupted the bat mitzvah experience beyond redemption!" What? Joan says it seems like Grace may have a few issues. Grace: "I'm cool." Joan: "Cool." Grace: "Cool." Joan: "Do I need to say 'cool' again or are we finished?" Grace says they're finished. Joan: "Cool. So what are you wearing?" Grace stops and sighs: "A dress." Joan tries to keep a straight face: "You're…wearing a dress?" Grace: "Oh, nice smirk. Thanks for the help." She takes off. Joan, totally failing to suppress her expression: "I wasn't smirking! I was…I had to sneeze."
Glynis, Luke, and Friedman are sitting on some stairs, discussing what to get Grace for her bat mitzvah. Friedman: "I'm thinking ten shares of eBay. It's practical yet romantic." Luke wonders if he's insane. Friedman: "Why not? The Teitelbaums gave me ten shares of Halliburton. Talk about the gift that keeps on giving…" Okay, I'm back to hating Friedman now. Luke: "I'm not giving Grace stock." Glynis: "Ooh! You could give her a bran muffin." Luke looks up: "Why would I do that?" Glynis: "Oh, 'cause that's what you got me when we were going out. Except you were low on cash and I had to pay." Wow, it's a good thing she's moved on. I'd hate to see what she'd be like if she hadn't. Friedman: "Lingerie." Luke: "For a bat mitzvah?" Yes, her parents should really enjoy seeing her shaygets boyfriend give their daughter some filmy, wispy piece of underwear. Not to mention how very much Grace is not the Victoria's Secret type. Friedman: "Exactly! The lady is becoming a woman. Am I not good?" Should I answer that? Glynis muses, "The muffin was a little stale. I'm not bitter, though." Whew. Thank God. Friedman: "Is a moped too expensive?" Luke, fed up, closes his book and takes off. Friedman stands up and calls, "Dude…the Friedman knows what to choose for the Chosen People!"
Joan and Adam are at Skylight Books, researching Judaism. Joan might also be working, although -- not to channel Sammies 1.0 or 2.0 too much -- it can be hard to tell. Joan reads, "'In ancient times, some tribes marked the coming of age ceremony by having the celebrant kill, cook and eat a large animal.'" Adam doesn't think there will be any hunting at Grace's party. Joan: "Nah, she's having it catered. 'Becoming a bat mitzvah means a young person has become part of the community and shares moral responsibilities of an adult and is now of age to study the Torah.' Wow, Grace is going to have a lot of homework. No wonder she's flipping out." Adam reads over her shoulder: "'Studying the Torah is a gift, as it is said to contain all one needs to know of life.' That'd make things easy." Joan agrees that answers would be nice. She reshelves the book while Adam tries to figure out how to say what he's about to say: "Jane…um…before the summer, you know, uh…" He looks around. "When…you saw…you know, God…" Joan looks uncomfortable and clears her throat: "Adam…" He apologizes, but persists: "If there's anything you ever heard that can make things clearer…you know, about death…" Joan rolls her eyes: "Ha! It doesn't work that way. I…it -- I mean -- it doesn't -- I don't -- I -- I don't have any answers, Adam. Look at me. Don't I look like the kind of person who needs the answers just as much as you do?" Adam turns away, disappointed: "Yeah, sorry, I just…" Joan: "Well, please…you promised me you wouldn't bring this up anymore." Cut him a break, Joan. He's hurting too. He's also desperate for guidance. At least tell him the stuff about how God doesn't appear to you; you see God, and how Adam might be able to see God for himself if he opened himself up to the possibility. ["Also, watch your tenses." -- Sars] Joan adds, "Besides, we shouldn't be talking about death. Grace is about to become a woman, and she's going to have a lotta homework, and we just need to be happy for her!" Adam nods: "Sure. Sure. Okay. I didn't mean to…" He leans on the top of the bookshelf, trying not to mope openly. Joan apologizes and moves to give him a hug, just as Shammy wanders past: "This is work-related, I trust?" Adam holds up Judaism for Dummies and says Joan was recommending a really good book. Shammy keeps on moving.
Just then Grace comes into the store and Joan exclaims loudly, "Grace! Shalom! I've just been reading about bat mitzvahs! You must be so stoked!" Yeah, "stoked" is written all over her face. Grace: "Yeah, I'm tingling." From up on the level of the store, Shammy demands, "Is anyone gonna buy anything?" Grace mutters, "That was rhetorical, right?" as she helps herself to some coffee. Shammy: "Why can't you hang out in a [sic] arcade like normal delinquents?" Shut it, Shammy. Why can't you work out which article you need before a word that starts with a vowel? Joan clears her throat, but clearly the closed captioning people for this show are a little overworked, because they've indicated "Amen" instead "ahem." Hee. Joan says to Grace, "So anyway, did you know that becoming a bat mitzvah is also referred to as being called to the Torah and that only recently, women were introduced to the ceremony?" Grace: "Are you on a game show, Girardi? Look, I don't know why I agreed to wear a lame-ass dress to this thing…" Adam looks up: "Dress?" Grace: "You did not say that, Rove!" Adam: "Okay." Grace continues: "Anyway, the blade is about to fall. So…you have to come with me to buy one. Tomorrow. After school." She doesn't look at Joan, but fusses with her coffee instead. Joan, trying to contain her delight: "You need…help?" Grace: "Hey, me and a dress: it takes a village." Ha! Joan can't contain herself anymore: she smiles and claps with glee.
Will's getting dressed and Helen's straightening up the bed. Will complains about Ryan and his "low-life" lawyer. I love the colour of the blue shirt Helen's wearing, and the lighter blue T-shirt underneath it. I'm getting more into blue these days. Also red. Also -- God help me -- pink. There's clearly something wrong with me. My normal wardrobe makes Grace's look like a rainbow. Frink refers to my part of the closet as "the black hole." Helen figures his lawyer's doing her job. Will says he can't hear that excuse anymore, and complains some more. Helen wonders if they could talk about something else: "Politics, even?" She seems tired and unhappy. I want their dresser. Will says Judith's mother calls him every day asking for new information: "I know it's out there and I can't give her anything!" Helen sighs. Will says Lucyfer thinks he's getting too emotionally involved. Helen: "Oh, well, if Lucy[fer] thinks so…" Will's surprised: "Helen…" She apologizes, saying that was out of line. He leaves. She throws the last of the pillows on the bed irritably.
Dress shop. Grace is whipping hangers along a rack looking for a dress that won't provoke any more homicidal rage than she's already stewing in: "The whole concept of a dress is a sexist symbol of thousands of years of reducing women to fetish objects!" Joan: "This would look so hot on you!" Heh. Grace: "Have you been listening at all?" Joan: "Yeah, angry, angry, angry, society, angry, angry, politics, angry." She loops a red sleeveless dress on a hanger over Grace's neck. Grace looks sulky but leaves the dress there. I think she should be looking into a chic little black suit, which is the only skirted item I can ever imagine her finding use for again. Couldn't she have worn an elegant pantsuit? I don't think non-Orthodox Judaism requires women in skirts. I think even in Orthodox Judaism there are allowances for pants for situations like working in kibbutzim. Joan tells her it's a once-in-a-lifetime thing, like a wedding: "Except lots of people do that more than once, so it'll be even better." Grace: "Guilt and pressure. That is [sic] the only reasons I'm here." Maybe Rabbi and Mrs. Polonski could work on Ryan, or his lawyer. Joan keeps looking through dresses as she insists, "No, that is not true. Look, you've never been afraid to say no to anything before. You learned Hebrew, all the prayers…this has to mean something to you." Grace: "Yeah, well, it gets kinda diluted when you have to spend three hours trying to convince the DJ not to blow off a confetti cannon when you walk into the party." Joan holds up a black dress with wispy little transparent cap sleeves, saying, "Look, very Courtney Love, huh? What do you think: post-makeover, pre-meltdown?" Well, it's definitely pre-meltdown, but it's not really Versace enough for post-makeover. Nor is there nearly as much décolletage as Courtney requires to show off her rack. Joan loops that dress over Grace's neck, too, telling her to try it on. Professor Frink: "It's like she's in stocks." I think Grace would agree.
Before Grace can make another angry comment, someone comes into the store waving and singing, "Gracie!" It's her mom. Grace mutters, "Oh, my God." She gets the hangers off her neck and pastes on a passably pleasant look over the sheer horror. You can just bet she loves being called Gracie. Grace's mother is played by Mary Mara, who was excellently cast, as about 95% of this show is. She says, "You must be Joan. I'm Sarah, Gracie's mom. She hides me because I don't wear all black. I think." You just keep telling yourself that, rummy. "I know I'm supposed to leave you alone, honey, but you're not an adult until Saturday, so I'm still allowed." Actually, in my book, once your child has had to put your drunken ass in the shower, you're not allowed to play the "not an adult" card anymore. I think Grace is going to throw up. Quietly, she tells her babbling mother to take a breath: "Are you…" Sarah says she's fine. Sarah tells Joan it's so nice to finally meet her. Joan: "You too. I was…starting to think that maybe Grace didn't have a mother." Way to help, Joan. Sarah says she constantly tells Grace to bring her friends over: "She finally let your brother through. He seems so nice." She whispers, "Even though I've just seen him leaving." Heh. Good thing Joan already found out, or this would be even more excruciating for Grace. Sarah turns her attention to the dresses Grace is holding: "Those are beautiful!" Grace won't relinquish them: "Okay, Mom." Sarah pretends to zip it: "I'm done, not another word." Grace says she's going to go try them on. Sarah stops her, saying, "Let's see how it looks with this." She starts unfastening the silver pendant she's wearing as Grace says, "What are you doing, Mom? Grandma gave you that." Sarah says it's her turn to wear it now. Grace is stunned. Frink: "That shut her up good." Joan: "Oh, that is so sweet! I wanna be Jewish!" Should we tell her the necklace thing has nothing to do with religion? The necklace is just long enough to hang below the fish necklace Grace usually wears. Grace's eyes look slightly wet as she contemplates all the meanings wrapped up in this: the inheritance, the passages it represents, and her fears both for her mother and of turning out like Sarah. Her mother smiles at Grace, who just looks serious. She goes into the dressing room without a word. Sarah moves over to Joan, saying, "I don't mean to embarrass her…" Joan chalks it up to being a mom. Aw, the scene's over? We don't get to watch her try stuff on? I kind of wish the whole hour was "Grace buys a dress." I could watch that.
Meanwhile, Friedman and Luke are shopping at Torahs 'n' Tallits (right across the street from Qur'ans 'n' Qitsch, and around the corner from Bibles 'n' Bibelots) for a bat mitzvah gift for Grace. Man, I love religious stores. I mean, I have a really weird thing for them. It's my idea of a fun and interesting day to check out religious stores. Doesn't matter which religion, though I'm exceptionally fond of Judaica stores. Perhaps I should keep that under my yarmulke, since I finally converted to Islam three weeks ago. (Yes, really.) Anyway, I've got this Judaica catalogue right here, and I'm thinking Grace might like this Personalized Hebrew Torah in Lucite. Or maybe not. Or how about this T-shirt that says, "AMERICA DON'T WORRY / ISRAEL IS BEHIND YOU" with a picture of a Kfir fighter plane? Mmm, maybe not so much. Acrylic bagel holder? Too impersonal. Chocolate Topographical Map of Israel? Mmm…Galileecious. How about a shofar? She could make a joyful noise unto the Lord. Or just a really excellent racket at the political protest she attends. Can of Mashuga Nuts? They're kosher-dairy! I've got it: this lovely My Bat Mitzvah Keepsake Journal. "Dear Keepsake Journal: Well, I got through it without killing anybody…though really, who would convict me for Friedman? I bet people would be lining up to help me hide the body…" Friedman's extolling the virtues of a particular tallit (prayer shawl): "Okay, this one's pretty nifty. It's got Jerusalem embroidered on it. Matching kippah. Smoking hot." He dons the kippah, putting the lie to the "smoking hot" part. Hey, if Luke doesn't find anything he likes in this store, he could go online. (Isn't that the best store name ever?) Luke, unsure: "People really give these?" Friedman: "I got five." Luke: "And you like them?" Friedman: "Like them? They're bar mitzvah presents. Nobody likes them. They simply exist, like Stonehenge." Hee. Friedman sighs and wanders over to a display of silver goods: "Consider the candlestick: A popular Shabbat favourite." To Luke's uncertain look, Friedman explains, "Shabbat: the lighting of the candles, Friday night…" Luke: "She doesn't do that." Friedman: "Then she can use it to kill Colonel Mustard in the library." Ha! Friedman tells him he's overthinking it. Luke? Really? Luke says he can't just give her some random thing: "I should give her something that when she looks at it, she thinks of me." Give her a really awesome geode, dude, one of those huge suckers lined with amethyst. Or a really rare Beanie Baby. Luke adds, "Even when she's ninety." Friedman: "There's always the giant sea turtle."
Back at the bookstore, and Joan actually seems to be working. And whistling. Whistling bugs me. And don't even get me started on that "whistle while you work" crap. That makes me want to take a pipe wrench to your puckered lips. Singing is fine, humming is fine. Air guitar, break-dancing, shaking your booty to the universal funk? All fine. No whistling. And no mime. End. Of. Story. Wait: No knuckle-cracking, either. All right, now I'm done. Officious Hall Monitor God comes in to put up some posters for a recycling festival. Sounds like a gas. Maybe I should have called her Postering God. Joan wonders if the Almighty Creator can't take a break: "Come on, who's gonna yell at you?" Officious Hall Monitor God: "Well, what can I say? Lots to do, lots to do." Joan: "Well, you don't have to worry about me. Because I'm doing just great, aren't I?" God nods, as she picks up a Styrofoam coffee cup. "I so helped Grace out with her dress. She was gonna wear this seriously nasty green that was totally wrong for her skin tone. I am all over this bat mitzvah thing." Officious Hall Monitor God gives Joan grief for the Styrofoam cup: "You know plutonium decomposes quicker than these? Sometimes I think all I do is ask humanity to clean up its room." And all humanity does is sit there looking blank, eating chips…or at best, kicking the mess under the bed. Joan: "Shouldn't God listen?" She claims she multitasks: "If I didn't, well…you wouldn't want to know." Okay, not loving Officious Hall Monitor God. Very little sparkle and personality there. I can't tell if it's the writing or the actor, but…no love. Joan: "You know, I knew nothing about Judaism before. I don't think I could ever learn Hebrew, especially not while I'm taking French." Oh, Joan. You could if you set your mind to it. I taught myself the Hebrew alphabet in a couple of days. You could probably manage it in…say, six months. The Avatar Whose Name I'm Tired Of Typing says, "Try being Hindu and learning Sanskrit." Yeah, I'm still working on that one. (The Sanskrit, not the Hindu. You think I want Frink's parents to have a stroke?) We finally come to the point of all this blather: Joan asks, "Why did you make so many religions, anyway? I mean, wouldn't it be easier if everybody had the same one?" I can feel the audience waiting for this answer. God replies, "Well, there's so many different people. They all need a different way of relating to me, and that's what religions are -- different ways to share the same truth." Frink: "Blasphemer." Well, it's as good and as ecumenical an answer as you're probably going to get from network television. Joan: "And…the…truth…is…?" The truth, Joanie, is that Officious Hall Monitor God is going to answer your question by leaving now. Joan: "Come on, I helped Grace. Cut me some slack! Just one answer." She just gets that weird backward Godwave.
Kevin's looking at some goofy painting in what I gather is the lobby of some building, when Beth comes in, apparently a little surprised to find him there. He says, "Did you know that 90% of paintings hanging in building lobbies are all painted by the same guy?" Beth: "Really." Kevin: "No, but wouldn't it be a great article if it were true?" What is with Beth's hair? I mean, I have never understood it: it's so choppy and strange that it actually distracts me much of the time. I try to ignore it, but seriously: too many layers, too many different haircuts and styles going on on the same cranium. Sort it out, please, hair people. She asks Kevin what he's doing there. He hesitates before admitting that he doesn't really know. Beth: "Okay." He says he just wanted to see if she was okay. She just looks at him kind of sadly. He adds, "It's just like, all of a sudden, we're -- we're…back in it again. Andy, and us, and everything…I thought…" He glances at her nervously. "Uh, I just didn't want you to be alone with it." She thanks him. He asks, "Do you want to get a cup of coffee?" She says sure and starts to walk away as Kevin adds, "Will you get me one, too?" She laughs and smacks him on the shoulder. They take off chuckling.
Adam's in his studio painting when Joan comes in to tell him she just met Grace's mom. "She's like the total anti-Grace. She's all funny and outgoing. Mind you, the closed captioning reads, "She's like this horrible anti-Grace." Joan wants to know why Adam didn't tell her about Sarah. Adam says he hasn't seen her in years: "Grace's house is kinda off-limits. I'm surprised she let you meet her." Joan says Grace didn't, and her mother just showed up while they were shopping: "Then she took us out to this old-time bar downtown for buffalo wings, which were the best thing in the entire world. Of course, Grace couldn't wait to get out of there: something about corporate agriculture and factory-raised chickens." Adam smiles knowingly. Joan wonders what he's working on. She walks around the table to see that it's a painting of Judith in Adam's pop art style. It's a nice painting. Huh. I thought it was going to be something he was making as a bat mitzvah gift for Grace. When Joan sees it, she's caught off-guard. She says quietly, "Judith." He's working from a small black and white picture of her. Adam says softly, "It was the day she died. You know, we were having coffee. She was telling me what kind of flowers to get you for our date." Joan: "Getting a little obsessed, don't you think?" Adam: "No. It makes me feel better. You should try it." She looks at him: "I don't paint." He suggests she try writing about it. Joan shakes her head a bit: "Why would I want to think about that day?" Adam says it helps to look at it and try to make sense of it. Joan starts to walk out: "We can't. It doesn't make any sense. Not even God can make sense of this one." Adam: "Jane, if we could just --" Joan: "Don't. I just meant that…I just meant that this means we have to move on. You know, that's why this bat mitzvah thing is so important. We get to be happy." She claims she has to go talk to Grace about shoes: "She's all into wearing boots. I'll see you later, okay?" Adam makes a little sound of discouragement but doesn't try to stop her.
Nighttime at the Girardi house. Joan's in her room writing in a notebook in very large, angry, letters. The page starts with the word "WHY." She mutters, "You can't give me anything. I did everything you wanted. Why can't you help me?" It's Joan's own little book of questions. She picks the notebook up and hurls it angrily at the wall in front of her. There's a knock on the window. I can't believe Grace still feels the need to shinny up the pipe, now that everyone knows about her and Luke. Joan opens the window and sits on a chair arm while Grace climbs onto the window ledge: "Are you talking to yourself, Girardi? They're not going to have to lock you up again, are they?" Joan: "Doors, Grace. Is that a corporate plot, too?" Hee. Grace hands her a pair of black high heels. Joan says they went so well with the dress: "Just because they don't have steel in the toe…" Grace says she doesn't need them: " And you don't have to help me with my hair, either. I'm calling it off." Joan: "What? Why? It's in two days." Grace: "Not anymore. See, you were right. I can say no." Grace disappears down the side of the house. Joan throws the window shut.
Joan's at work, trying to call Grace. She leaves a message telling Grace to call her: "I'm wearing out the redial." Shammy, who's apparently got precious little to do other than harangue Joan -- does Heidi not have a high-maintenance sister (or brother, hey) we could pair him off with? -- asks, "Bat Mitzvah girl still missing?" Frink: "Don't be helpful." Joan: "I just don't get it." Shammy: "She's better off. Religion is the opiate of the people." Says the owner of the bourgeois bookstore. Joan: "Oh, you're a Communist, now." A customer comes up to the cash desk to pay for a book, and Joan says, "Oh, no. No need to pay. What's mine is yours. Enjoy." Dude, I wanna shop at that store. How come that never happens to me? Shammy: "Excuse me while I go dock your pay." Some big bruiser in a leather coat, a sort of Tony Soprano type, comes in and says, "I just finished Wuthering Heights. And I hear that Sense and Sensibility can be a real tearjerker too. You got that one?" Joan: "You wanna read Sense and Sensibility?" He starts looking around the store as he replies, "A tough exterior can hide a tender heart, Joan." Aw. It's GodFella (tm OhTara). Joan bolts out from behind the counter and over to him: "Hey! Almighty One! I have been calling Grace nonstop! She won't talk to me!" He sympathizes: "Must make it hard to figure out what the problem is, huh?" Joan: "Yeah! You could help." GodFella chuckles to himself as he peruses the shelves: "Still after the answers." Joan crosses her arms: "Uh, yeah." He says, "What really broke my heart in Wuthering Heights is that Catherine destroyed her love for Heathcliff by hiding her feelings. That killed me." Joan wants to know how this pertains to Grace and her bat mitzvah. He finds Sense and Sensibility and pulls it off the shelf: "Pretty cover, huh?" He smiles, and walks away, telling Joan not to give up on her.
Lucyfer, with a fluffy new shorter haircut that is some improvement but still not 100% there, opens the door to Will's office, poses herself in the doorway as curvaceously as she thinks she can get away with, and says, "Happy birthday." Oh…God…what now? Will, as dense as a neutron star, says it's not his birthday. Lucyfer, all too seductively: "Well, I got you a little something anyway." I -- I don't think I can look. She walks away, and Will gets up and follows her out into the main area, where a uniform is bringing Ryan in on charges of looking like a suspect in a convenience store hold-up. Lucyfer waves a security camera photo taken of some guy at a bank of lockers. Will grabs it and tells her they're "really walking on the edge" since the guy looks nothing like Ryan. Lucyfer's all crossed arms and "Don't you want to catch the bad guy who killed the little girl?" Oof. "Trust me, I've been down this road before." I'll bet. And it's nicely paved, too. To Ryan: "Let's go, precious." He says she knows this is crap. Lucyfer: "Maybe, but since it's the weekend, it might take a few days to sort out. But meanwhile, you'll have a nice bed and three squares a day and some charming roommates to pass the time with." The uniform takes him away at the gesture of her head. Will looks uncertain about this.
Someone knocks on an unfamiliar door with…a very flowery stained glass window? Or is that one of those stick-on deals? It's the Polonski kitchen door. Sarah answers the door to find Joan there. She says what a nice surprise it is. Joan apologizes for bothering her but says she can't find Grace. Sarah, a little wobbly on her feet, braces herself subtly on the counter as she tells Joan that Grace is with her dad and should be back soon. She offers Joan a soda as she remembers the open bottle of liquor on the island and grabs it. Joan asks her if she's okay. Sarah says she's just a little tired as she puts the bottle on the back of the counter, where apparently it's not visible to anyone who isn't drunk. She tells Joan to help herself and that Grace will be back soon. As she unsteadily seats herself at the island, she smiles at Joan, who's beginning to get the picture. Sarah: "Grace is so lucky to have a friend like you." Joan: "Yeah, me too." Sarah: "Hmm. She's always so embarrassed with me. But I think we had a lovely time the other day, don't you?" Joan: "Yeah, sure." Sarah asks her again if she'd like a soda, but she asks like she just thought of it for the first time. Joan declines and decides she should go, and asks her to get Grace to call her. Joan walks out slowly, glancing at the liquor bottle again before she goes, as Sarah struggles to keep her composure until Joan's gone.
Friedman and Luke are now at Skylight Books in search of a bat mitzvah present. Well, now we're getting somewhere. Books are the best gift. After cash. Because with cash, you can pick out your own books. See how that works? Friedman pulls a large illustrated volume off the shelves: "We could go Kama Sutra: you said you wanted personal." He cracks it open and comments, "If that's not personal I don't know what is." Luke, getting fed up: "Friedman, this is a religious event! It should have deeper meaning than…" Distracted by an illustration, he comments, "Remarkably limber." He comes to his senses and says, "No." He's drawn to a large coffee-table book on astronomy on top of the remainder table. Friedman: "An astronomy text? Now that's relationship suicide." Luke's not so sure about that: "We met in science class…" Friedman grabs the book: "My God, it's used! Grandparents wouldn't give that." No, it's remaindered. There's a difference. Maybe it's damaged, and that's what he means. Friedman is distracted by a nicely bound copy of Hamlet on display. Luke keeps looking through the book as Friedman wanders over and picks up the Shakespeare. He opens it to an illustration of Hamlet and Ophelia captioned, "This is the very ecstasy of love…" It's interesting that they had Judith and her friends trying to buy X when she got stabbed, considering they've brought this line up two or three times now. Think that's one of those subconscious things? Friedman reads the caption and says, "Oh, this would have been perfect for…Judith." Luke doesn't notice what Friedman's up to; he's engrossed in the book, declaring it "perfect." He tells Friedman: "I found it. There's [sic] no admonitions, Friedman. I am committed." Absently, Friedman says, "You know best, buddy." He's still lost in his memory of Judith, and what he wishes could have been.
That night in Joan's bedroom, she's telling Luke about what she observed of Grace's mother: "It was so weird: the other day her mom was like this regular, normal mom and then today, she was drunk." ["I don't think I understand this line. Joan says they went to a bar; I know she was obliviously focused on the buffalo wings, but…bar. Hello? I don't know. Weird writing all around in this ep, very funny but kind of out of character for a lot of people." -- Sars] Luke says he's never seen Grace's mother while she's been drinking: "I've only been to her place a couple of times." Joan says she was a totally different person: "So sad." Then: "If this happens all the time, you should have told me!" Oh, come on. She must know Grace better than that. Luke says Grace made him promise not to tell. Joan: "I'm her best friend! I should have known." Seriously, now. You couldn't even figure out she was seeing Luke, and you've been running around for weeks being "Joanith." How can you qualify as her best friend? By virtue of the absence of competition? Luke: "And I'm her boyfriend." He says he convinced her to go to Alateen. "You have to give her time." Joan: "Time? Luke, she already put off her bat mitzvah." Luke says she's done that before: "Probably for the same reason." Joan says she has to do this. Suddenly Grace marches in: "Why the hell did you come to my house?" Joan doesn't know how to answer. Grace looks at Luke: "Did you tell her, freak?" They both tell her he didn't. Joan says she just wanted to talk to her, and Grace wouldn't call her back. Grace: "And you couldn't take a hint? This is none of your business!" She tells Luke, "And it's none of yours anymore either. We're done." Luke says he's sorry. She's out in the hall already as Joan calls, "I was concerned." Grace: "Just leave it alone!"
Joan chases her down the stairs: "Grace, you have to do this!" Grace: "Why the hell do you care if I chant some stupid prayers?" They reach the bottom of the stairs as Joan says, "Because you care!" Grace: "Ha! This was just for my parents -- and you shouldn't have come over!" Joan grabs her arm and asks her why she's running away: "You don't seem to mind getting in people's faces except for when it matters!" Grace tells her to save it. Joan yells, "You hide Luke -- which, yeah, okay, I kinda understand -- but you hide your mom; you hide all the important stuff, Grace. I'm not Jewish, but it seems to me this whole bat mitzvah thing is about standing up and declaring yourself! Getting in people's faces for real!" Grace just stares at Joan, but with less defiance than you'd expect. Luke, on the landing of the stairs, says quietly, "Grace…" She looks up. He says in a small voice, "I already got you a present." Grace still doesn't say anything. Joan sighs. Then we have the bad third-quarter cut to commercial.
Grace is in the closet. Well, I don't know about that one, but she's behind the louvered doors of her bedroom closet getting dressed for her bat mitzvah. From inside, her muffled voice threatens Joan: "You better tell the truth or I'll cancel again!" Joan: "I told you, I will." Grace: "If I hear the word 'adorable,' I'll go postal." Joan: "O-kay. Getting bored and crabby out here." The door opens and we see Grace's feet, in black, open-toed, ankle strap high heels. She's wearing -- not the dress I would have expected, let me tell you. It's black, which is the only part that doesn't surprise me. It has an asymmetrical hem with a floral border print against a widely-spaced pattern of thin white pinstripes. It has a high waistline, almost Empire, with a wide, satiny black waistband. There's a low-ish, draped V-neck. It's sleeveless. Isn't that going to be a bit of an issue at temple? I thought women had to have their shoulders covered in synagogues. I was told as much when I was last invited to a wedding in a temple. Anyway, it's way more typically feminine than I was expecting. Grace's hair is perfectly combed and flat-ironed, parted on the side, and there's a little black barrette pulling the hair back on the wide side. She looks very, very cute. Such a shana maidelah. She steps out of the closet and Joan says, "Wow. Grace!" (Dwell on that sentence for a while, would you?) Grace mutters gently, "Shut up, dude." But you can tell she's sort of pleased, in spite of herself. She starts wrestling with her nylons and says, "Whoever invented pantyhose should be shot." You're not the first to think so, grrrlchik, and you won't be the last.
There's a knock on the door and she turns to see her father come in. He's dumsquizzled to see Grace all fancied up. He leans against the wall: "My little girl in high heels?" Grace: "Cry on the dress, Dad, and they become lethal weapons." He comes over and gives her a hug and tells her that her mother will be ready soon. Grace gives him a look of concern, the type she doesn't feel comfortable stating in front of Joan, even though Joan knows now. Her dad assures her that her mother is going to be fine today: "Because she promised." Yeah, I'll she's hardly ever broken a promise, either. He looks at Joan: "I'm really sorry about the other day. She had help, but..." Grace glances back at Joan and then away again. Joan says he doesn't need to explain. To Grace he says, "I just wish I had an answer for…why this has to be this way. I don't know." He asks if Grace wants to go over her Torah portion again. She shakes her head: "It's under neural lockdown." He kisses her on the head and she says, "Let's boogie." Let's…boogie? No. Grace Polk did not just say that. She says she'll be down in a minute, as her father takes off. Aw. I love Grace's dad. I like him so much I'm almost willing to forgive him for leaving Grace to deal with her mother alone. Almost. ["I don't get this, either -- why Rabbi P. hasn't looked into rehab for Sarah. (Heh.) Or maybe he has, but I do find the fact that the problem is still ongoing a bit odd." -- Sars] She crouches down and pulls her grandmother's necklace out of the pocket of her jeans. Joan offers, "Do you want me to…" Grace smiles: "Yeah." Joan pauses a moment as Grace smiles at herself. As Joan reaches over Grace's head to out the necklace on, we see Grace looking at herself in her cheval mirror, which is draped with her tallit. Could you have pictured this scene a year ago?
Cut to the synagogue. That is one gorgeous spray of flowers up there. Grace and her parents and a cantor are at the front, as the cantor leads the singing. Sarah's wearing a dressy, pale pink (or maybe beige) coat over a mid-calf-length black dress with a small black hat. Grace is still just in the sleeveless dress and is wearing a kippah. In the audience we see Luke, smiling to himself, Adam and Joan, and Friedman in one of his five tallits and one of his five kippahs (actually, I believe talaysin and kippot are the plurals). Joan's wearing a raspberry mousse-coloured top with tiny cap sleeves and a matching hat, or possibly a kippah, it's hard to tell. Where would she get one that matches such a colour perfectly? Everyone finishes and sits as Rabbi Polonski greets them: "Shabbat Shalom. Today Grace becomes a bat mitzvah. She enters a new chapter in her life where she will see the world not through my eyes or her mother's, but through her own." Dude, no disrespect, but not only did that chapter start quite some time ago, but we're well into that book. Friedman: "Who knew the lady was a lady?" Yeesh. Glynis, in some kind of Jackie O hat, nudges him. The rabbi continues: "And this ceremony is about a celebration of that new sight, the awareness of the complexity of life, awareness that she now holds the moral responsibility for her own decisions."
Cut to the cantor picking up the beautiful Torah scroll in its elaborate cover, as he sings a prayer. He hands it to Grace's father, who carries it over to Grace and hands it to her with a little speech about the tradition of handing down the Torah. It's about the same size and weight as she is, but she does an admirable job of supporting it. "This Torah is being entrusted to you, Grace, with all it contains: the tradition, the history, the beauty, the pain, the struggle, and most of all…the mystery." As Grace carefully sets it down on the bima, and the congregation sits down again, Friedman comments, "Check out the muscle definition in her calves." Glynis: "Don't you have any respect?" Friedman: "Respect? I'm in awe here." Glynis: "Shut it." Oh! Almost a shout-out. Once again, I require "Shut it, Friedman." But the writers know that. They're just playing with me.
Back to the ceremony: her father says, "Today you are a woman, Grace," as he drapes her tallit around her shoulders. Joan beams. Her father sighs and says, "Take care of my little girl." He kisses her on the side of her head. I guess in this synagogue, they only require women's shoulders to be covered if they're reading the Torah. ["I noticed too that Luke didn't seem to have a yarmulke on, which I thought was also required even of the non-Jewish in the congregation (my dad always had to wear one when we went to a bar or bat mitzvah). So maybe the rules have changed. What hasn't changed: Sars interrupting Deborah forty thousand times a recap. Sorry." -- Sars]
Cut to Grace reciting her Torah portion, which I'm told is Shabbat VaYishlach, the actual Torah portion for the weekend this aired. (You can read an English translation here.) I'm always surprised that the show attends to tiny details like this, but plays fast and loose with huge things like…when Kevin's accident occurred. Grace's voice sounds almost unrecognizable as she reads. Apparently Becky Wahlstrom worked on her reading with the man who appears as the cantor in this episode. There's a cool wall hanging behind her, which has lots of wiggly lines in red, yellow, and orange radiating out from Grace. Shots of Joan kvelling away in the audience, beaming like a bubbe.
Cut to the audience singing and clapping. Well, most of them are singing. Adam doesn't know the words, Joan and Luke are mumbling along as best they can, and as for the speculation about whether or not Glynis is Jewish -- I think not. She doesn't seem to know the words, either. She's clapping very tentatively. Also: Figliola. My money's on Catholic. They finish the song and sit down. Everyone leaves Grace alone at the bima and she says, "I know we're all bonding here with the singing, but seriously, that is a bad song." Mild chuckling. She carries on, undeterred: "Anyway, basically, me and my dad have been fighting about this day since I hit the double digits. And, uh…I won't go into it. It was a political thing. And a daughter of a rabbi thing. But finally I gave in and indulged them in one last empty ritual before I'm outta here." A tip, Grace: Don't go into the spin doctor business. "But then, um, not to get all gooey or anything like that…" She turns to look at her father. "When you handed me the Torah, and I read those words, it hit me…this is a genius way of attacking adulthood. I mean, this scroll…there are no easy answers in here. It's basically a book of questions…something that makes us keep searching for a way to make sense of this mess. And just dealing with a lot of questions: that takes a lot of guts when there's no guarantee that there will be answers. And, uh, I just hope I'm up for it. So…fire up that cheesy music and let's eat."
Cut to a downpour of confetti -- in all the colours Joan used for distributing Grace's poem -- and Grace hoisted aloft on a chair, with some of those glow-in-the-dark plastic raver necklaces around her neck. "Hava Nagila" is playing like crazy and Grace shouts over the music, "Dude, I warned you!" I think she's yelling at the DJ. But she's smiling and laughing and having a good time despite herself.
Back at the Girardi house, Beth knocks on Kevin's door. She comes in, saying his mother told her he wouldn't mind. He closes his laptop and asks if she's okay. She kinda snorts and you can see tears in her eyes: "I just finished the deposition." He invites her to sit down. She says, "They just kept trying to twist everything I said, you know? Make it seem like you didn't care what happened." She sits on the bed. "So I yelled at them." Kevin: "Cool." He is so still in love with her. Beth: "I just kept thinking…I just kept asking myself, you know…what if…what if I didn't pick a fight with you that night? You know, maybe you wouldn't have gotten in the car." Kevin wheels over to her and says it wasn't her fault. Beth wishes she could just take back that night. I think it's safe to assume you've got lots of company. Beth: "I don't understand why this is happening. Are we just supposed to forget about all this…go back to our lives?" Kevin doesn't know. He reaches over and takes Beth's hand. She sighs and puts her other hand on top.
Helen's reading on the couch when Will comes home. She says he's late. He says he was celebrating: "Ryan finally cracked." The kid gave them a description, so they've got something to go on. There's a little spring in his step as he comes over and kisses Helen, who says, "Thank God. Why didn't you call me?" Will's over at the bar, and says, "It was a long day. But -- gotta hand it to Lucy[fer]. She's really something." Helen: "Really." Will: "Ryan was doing his usual whine and sulk, and she comes in and apologizes for bringing him in on the convenience store bust. She says, um…she understands how he feels. She had me fooled." She sure has. Also: what the hell is so extraordinary about that? Helen asks: "What convenience store bust?" Will dismissively tells her about the bogus charge. Helen's dismayed: "False charges? Aren't -- aren't you worried his testimony won't hold up?" Will: "Look, I'm trying to find the guy who killed Judith. This is how business gets done." Helen, sighing a little, seems more dismayed: "You never used to talk like this before." Will: "Excuse me?" Helen: "Well…making false arrests, strong-arming some scared kid, and telling me that's how business is done. What are you, Dirty Harry?" Little shout-out to the forums there. Will, heading for the stairs, tells her she doesn't understand. Helen: "Do you?" He stops. She asks, "Did you even…question what you were doing?" He just goes upstairs without saying anything else. This isn't looking good. Seriously, what is going on with him? Wasn't he the guy who risked his neck to bust all the corruption in the Arcadia police department and local government? But then wait a minute -- wasn't there some reference, early in Season One, about Will having gotten in trouble in the distant past for not doing things by the book? Or am I just imagining that? I went combing through recaps to try to find it, but I'm running out of time to make my deadline here and I don't have time to read any more of them chasing what might be a figment of my imagination. Finally: is Will perhaps just desperate to put more distance between himself and his increasingly religious wife?
Back at Party Central, Friedman is enthusiastically leading a conga line around the floor. Shouldn't there have been some sort of parental guidance warning on this episode? Grace and Luke fight their way past the conga line as someone snaps a picture of them. Grace complains, "Those pictures are gonna surface one day. Bat Mitzvah Vets for Truth are gonna ruin my life." Luke laughs and goes off to get juice. Sarah takes this opportunity to intercept her daughter and tell "Gracie" how wonderful she was: "So beautiful." Grace glances at her mother's glass and her mother says it's just ginger ale. Grace gives her mother a tight smile. Sarah: "This is your night." Grace keeps on with the tight smile as she says, "I am not going there this time, Mom." Sarah seems slightly chagrined: "Don't you think I can change?" Grace just gives her a sad look. She doesn't say anything for a bit, and then: "I love you, Mom. Thank you for today." She hugs Sarah and walks off as Friedman's conga line snakes through.
We drift over to Joan, picking out nibbles. A Jewish auntie-type from Central Casting -- in the requisite hideously patterned/sequined top -- comes over and says, "Lovely affair." She pinches Joan's cheek: "You did a nice job, Joanie!" Do you think it would confuse Joan if we explained that what she did for Grace was a mitzvah? Joan: "God shouldn't pinch cheeks. It never makes the world better." YentaGod offers: "Rugelach?" Joan refuses, claiming she only eats what she can spell. That would really limit some folks. YentaGod investigates the dessert buffet as Joan asks, "So…questions? That's -- that's it? It's about questions?" YentaGod: "That's it." Joan has one, then: "Judith. Why did she have to die?" YentaGod: "What if she never lived at all?" Joan should say, "Why do you answer my question with a question?" And then YentaGod could say, "Why should a Jew not answer a question with a question?" Joan asks instead, "What if I had done things differently? What if I could have saved her?" YentaGod: "What if knowing you gave her days she never thought she'd have?" Joan: "No, no! I want answers. People need answers. Don't you see how much I miss her?" YentaGod: "Can't you still feel her? See, it's not about answers. It's about asking the right questions, Joanie." She gently pats Joan's cheek and leaves.
Luke's dragging Grace outside. She's objecting: "I told you not to get me anything." Luke's eyes are on the sky, as he urges her, "Just come on." Grace: "Alone in the dark? This better not be something Friedman suggested." He tells her to look up. She does. Luke: "No, no, no, right over there. Above the constellation Leo." Grace complains her neck is cramping. Suddenly Luke says, "Look! Did you see that?" He points at a shooting star -- a very slow, CGI shooting star. Grace smiles: "How did you get them to do that?" Luke explains, "It's the Leonid meteor shower. Happens every year or so." The Leonids can be awesome, especially if you've got a clear sky in an area not overly polluted by light. I think they're usually in November, although not normally this late. The camera's above them so we're looking down at their shining faces. They look at each other and Luke says, "So you'll never forget tonight." She beams at him. Luke: "I mean, it was either this or…Shabbat candlesticks." They point at some more sluggish meteors. The first notes of the Goo Goo Dolls's cover of "Give a Little Bit" start up. Bleah. Hate the Goo Goo Dolls. Got over Supertramp more than twenty years ago. Luke says, "You know, there's a theory that…that all organic matter on earth -- life -- may have come from those. Wonder if we'll ever know?" They look at the meteor shower a bit more and then Luke turns to Grace to kiss her, placing his hand gently on the side of her face. She puts her hand gently on the underside of his elbow. I tell you what, the kids on this show really know what they're doing with their hands. But enough with the looking-up-at-the-sky endings. They're lovely, but they're getting overused lately. I do like it as a recurring motif, but it's getting predictable. Too much of a good thing.
Joan's sitting alone at table, looking depressed. Or sulky, whichever. Adam comes by with drinks and sits down, saying, "Can't believe Grace actually went through with it." He gives half a chuckle. Joan: "I was so scared to ask. I mean, what if Judith died because we went on that date and what if that means we're not supposed to be together anymore?" Adam is troubled. But he's also really, really hot in this scene. He puts his hand on Joan's back and softly says, "No…" Joan: "I know, I know, I know. I just…I was just so scared to…to lose two people that I loved." She puts her head on his shoulder as Adam worries about all this.
Back to Luke and Grace watching meteors swarming slowly through the sky. They both seem so genuinely happy. I'd be almost as happy, except…I'm having to hear the Goo Goo Dolls. They can make it up to me by finally doing a story about Islam on this show. I'd be happy to consult…give me a shout. Conflict of interest? Feh. I'll get someone else to recap that ep.
Oh, and since I finally get a blessed week off, and won't be writing another recap until after the fact: Happy Chanukah!