Passive-Aggressive

S03E08

When an eighteen-year-old kid forced to raise his brother and sister after their parents died becomes sick, House decides to pit the Cottages against each other to see who can guess what's wrong with him. They all fail, of course, and House tells them that Jack has Hepatitis A. But when they cure him of that, Jack gets three more diseases. And then his brain has pus all over it. His immune system is compromised from a genetic disorder that only showed up when Jack was put under the stress of raising two kids. There are four things it could be, and the only way to figure out which one it is in time is to infect Jack with four different infections that each disease is especially susceptible to, and see which one Jack gets first. Chronic granulomateous disease is the lucky winner, and it can be cured with a bone marrow transplant. Jack's little brother is a match, but Jack refuses to let them do it since he says Will isn't old enough to give consent. House suspects that Jack has an ulterior motive for this, and he's right: Jack would rather stay sick and not have to take care of his brother and sister than get well and have to raise them. In other news, Tritter gets Wilson's car towed and his prescription-writing powers removed, forcing Wilson to shut down his practice. And House still won't help him out or even give him a ride home. I don't like Wilson, so I laugh at his pain for the entire episode. Ha ha ha!

First off, you'll all be pleased to know that I figured out how to use the Closed Captioning on my TV so as to prevent mistakes like last week's "incompetent"/"incontinent dog" fiasco. Mind you, I lost the instruction manual for my TV a long time ago, so it took me a great deal of time and effort to figure out how to get the closed captioning to work. And now I don't know how to make it go away, so I have words all over my screen all the time. But that's how much I care about you guys. Anyway, we open on a pizza place filled with arcade games and a giant rat mascot that is totally not a Chuck E. Cheese's. I used to beg my parents to have my birthday party there but they said no and I could never understand why. Now that I am an adult, I understand. And to be truthful, that animatronic robot band and the ballpit that was just a little too deep always kinda scared me, so it was for the best. A harried-looking young man passes a girl and tells her to get her own soda refill on his way to a table full of birthday partiers. He asks them if they're ready to sing the "Ralphy's Rumpus Birthday Rump Shake," which sounds pretty risqué for a children's song. The waiter and a guy in what could either be a squirrel, rat, or some sort of grey beaver costume dance in circles and sing the Ralphy's Rumpus Birthday Rump Shake song until the waiter looks sick and gets double vision. I'm pretty sure that happens to every adult who enters one of those places, though. Then he pukes all over the kids' table and collapses, holding his chest. The Magic School Bus Cam zooms inside his chest into his heart, which is zapped back to life by some EMTs with a defibrillator. The soda girl from before and a younger boy run up and say that the waiter is their brother. The EMT tells them to call their parents. The girl says that their parents are dead. The EMT just makes a face like "Ooh, that's hard luck, kiddies."

Post-credits, Wilson's car is being towed. He's confused as to why until the tow truck operator hands him a "love note from Detective Tritter" and I don't even get five minutes into this episode before I have to be extremely pissed off at the Detective Shitter, Omnipotent God of New Jersey storyline.

Over at PPTH, House has no sympathy for the eighteen-year-old orphan raising his brother and sister, since House has seen it all before on Party of Five, which he claims was "The O.C. of its day" even though it wasn't. Fox executives pat themselves on the back for getting not one but two of their shows mentioned in the same scene. House guesses that the stress of being a new parent and dealing with dead parents explains all of Patient Jack's health problems except for itchy feet, which Cameron explains away as athlete's foot. House accuses her of ignoring a symptom, and she gets huffy. Foreman is a neurologist, so he thinks they're looking at a brain problem. Chase thinks Jack caught something from one of the "feral kids" at the restaurant; Jack has barfed up so many fluids that he got an arrhythmia, causing the heart attack. And also, somehow, itchy feet. House says he knows the answer, but that he won't tell the Cottages. Instead, he'd rather make a game out of it and let them figure it out for themselves. Much like Encyclopedia Brown could only ask one question before solving his case, the Cottages get one test each to help them make a diagnosis. Their (literal) deadline is lunchtime. House scribbles something on the back of an envelope and posts it on the Whiteboard O'Symptoms. "The game is a itchy foot," the envelope Sherlock Holmes.

Wilson meets his lawyer, played by still-somehow-married-to-Marg Helgenberger Alan Rosenberg. Wilson says that Shitter is on a crusade and abusing his power. Much like House's lawyer, Alan has little sympathy for Wilson. His advice is to tell the police what they want so that they'll leave Wilson alone. Also, Wilson might want to consult a criminal attorney instead of a divorce lawyer. One redeeming feature of this scene is that Alan told Wilson that he sucks. Ha ha ha! He does, too.

The Cottages look over Jack's file. Chase tries to figure out which section of Jack's file House was looking at when he decided he knew what was wrong with him. Meanwhile, Cameron is wearing what appears to be a t-shirt with a red cross on it. She's covered it up with a vest, though, so don't think she went too crazy. Chase says that his one test with be a blood culture, believing he was on the right track with his guess that Jack had some kind of infection. Foreman's doing an MRI, since he still thinks it's a neurological problem even though House pretty much told him it wasn't. Cameron won't tell anyone what her test will be because she's That Girl. You know, the one who made a wall around her desk out of her Trapper Keeper during test time so that no one could cheat off her paper. Chase and Foreman dog her for playing House's game, but they're doing exactly the same thing, so they don't have much room to talk here.

Chase draws Jack's blood and asks him whether anyone at work has been sick. Meanwhile, Jack's brother, Will, and sister, Kama (kama kama kama kama chameleon), try to get out of doing their homework. "My brother's in the hospital. Mrs. Collier won't care if I finish my homework," Will says. Oh yes she will! Mrs. Collier is a hard-ass. House makes a surprise visit, taking a seat on the arm of the chair Will is sitting in. "Can I be your imaginary friend?" House asks Will. This would be a good time for Jack to tell Will that if a stranger ever says this to you, the answer is always "I'm calling the police." Chase introduces the family to House, who asks Jack about his itchy feet and what kinds of drugs he does. Chase ignores these clues and quietly tells Jack that he doesn't have to answer House in front of his brother and sister. Jack says that he doesn't hide anything from them, and that they know that he used to do drugs before their parents died. Now that he's a responsible guardian, he's clean: "If I'm open with them, then they'll be open with me." House scoffs at this plan, but Will says that he and Kama don't lie to Jack. House acts like a ten-year-old and starts teasing Will and Kama that they do too, even accusing eleven-year-old Kama of being sexually active. "I am not!" she says, hilariously indignant.

By Sara M

, Foreman gives Jack an MRI of DOOOM! House sits in the booth with Foreman and gets on the PA system to ask Jack about his drug habits. Jack once again denies smoking weed or even cigarettes, having recently quit his two-pack-a-day habit. Foreman chooses to ignore these clues, and tells House to lay off Jack, so House says that he'll just talk turkey with Foreman instead. He starts off by disapproving of Foreman's relationship with Nurse Wendy, saying that the kind of girl Foreman really needs is Foreman in a skirt. After a few seconds of this, Foreman turns House back on Jack. Jack says that he didn't really quit cigarettes; he just "lost the taste for" them. House thinks that this is could be some kind of symptom, but Foreman is sure that the problem is not in Jack's lungs. Judging by the MRI results, it's not in his brain, either.

Cameron's Special Secret Test is to inject Jack with a chemical called ergonovine that will tell her if his heart attack was caused by spasms in the vessels around his heart. House pokes his head in the room, startling Cameron. Jack wants to know why one doctor is testing his heart and another one is testing his brain. I'm sure his insurance company will want to know that as well. And I don't think they'll accept "pitting doctors against each other in a pointless race for a diagnosis." Cameron weakly explains that they're just trying to eliminate several possibilities. House has great good fun playing the Cameron to Cameron's House, asking Jack whether he consented to this medical procedure, in which another heart attack could be induced. But the ergonovine doesn't do anything, so Cameron has to "push" Jack a little. She does this with House's trademark brand of mental torture, getting in Jack's face and reminding him of all the responsibilities he has that being sick is making him neglect. He'll lose his job. Will and Kama will be taken away. Jack starts to stress out, but the heart attack does not ensue. "Can't you see his heart is fine? Stop torturing him! What kind of doctor are you?" House Camerons. Ha! Now you know how House feels when you have your little ethical dilemma every other episode, Cameron! Although I'm not sure how good it is for a patient to hear one doctor accusing another of torturing him. That wouldn't give you much faith in the people in charge of saving your life.

In the meeting room, the Cottages' tests have yielded no results. Ha! They all failed and totally suck at being doctors. Chase somehow managed to do a blood culture in a few hours even though the test usually takes a few days. House tacked a hepatitis test onto Chase's bloodwork and, lo and behold, it came back positive for hepatitis A, symptoms of which include vomiting, itchy feet, and a sudden distaste for nicotine. Which, by the way, means that House knew all along that Jack didn't need some of the tests the Cottages did on him, and that he let Cameron yell at Jack unnecessarily. Lest we forget that even when House is pretending to be nice, he's still an asshole. Foreman says that Hep A doesn't explain the heart attack, but House says that Chase was right about one thing: the vomiting caused an electrolyte imbalance, which then caused Jack's heart attack. And that's why you should always drink Gatorade after a night of drinking.

Wilson the Downer sulks into the meeting room and informs the group that his prescription privileges have been revoked. House's first concern? "Who's gonna prescribe my Vicodin?" Ha ha ha! No one cares about Wilson! And he just takes it! Ha ha ha! The Cottages sit back and observe, secretly hoping for the work drama of a fight as House tells Wilson to relax: this just means that Shitter is desperate and hoping he can squeeze Wilson into confessing. Wilson is not willing to let his patient suffer, even though House points out that most cancer medicine "sucks." Unlike, say, the medicine House uses, which has been known to contain arsenic and MELT PLASTIC. Wilson demands that House make his team available to write Wilson's patients' prescriptions until Wilson gets his privileges back. House tells the kids to put Jack on IVIg for the hepatitis.

Jack reads a story to Will while Kama pretends to be too grown up for it. Will is super-cute, by the way. The fact that I really liked Jack, Will, and Kama made this episode much more enjoyable for me. Good job, casting! Foreman walks in and says that the IVIg cleared the Jack's system of Hep A; he can be released tomorrow. Smiles all around. Jack asks Foreman how he got Hep A, and Foreman says that it could have been from food, cleaning the toilets at work, or...he looks around at the young'uns, and Jack says that they've "heard it all." "Anilingus," Foreman finishes. Well, I bet they haven't heard that one! Hell, I hadn't even heard that term before. I guess I always knew that it must exist, since "tossing one's salad" is definitely not a medical term. Jack says that he's been too busy raising children to go "spelunking," like that even takes all that much time. So I've heard. Suddenly, Jack bleeds out of every orifice.

Test results show that Jack is clear of Hep A, but now he has a blood coagulation disorder. Chase and Cameron blame the restaurant and the various diseases one could pick up there. Foreman blames sex -- because that's always the root of someone's fatal illness -- saying that a very dirty partner probably gave Jack an STD along with the Hep A. Wilson puts on his beleaguered face and asks to borrow a Cottage for prescription-writing purposes. House volunteers Cameron, saying that her ideas are dumb. Cameron shoots him a hilarious exasperated/pissed off expression and leaves. Chase is ordered to the restaurant to collect samples of Jack's puke, and Foreman is ordered to do an LP. Chase asks why he can't just test Jack directly, and House shows him into his office for the answer; he explains as they go that they shouldn't discuss it in front of "the help," shooting a pointed look at Foreman, who doesn't really look like he cares anyway. In the privacy of his office, House tells Chase that Jack probably barfed all the toxins out of his system, so a sample of his puke is a much better source. Especially when it's a couple of days old and has been contaminated with all kinds of other things. More importantly, House needs Chase to write House a prescription for Vicodin, since he's just about out of his last bottle. Shockingly, Chase refuses to do it, saying that he'd rather lose his job with House than lose his license. Wow, Chase actually said no to someone. I can't believe it! The Cottages are switching personalities all over the place today!

Wilson gives Cameron a rundown of the medications she'll need to prescribe for him. Cameron wants to meet the patients before she writes anything, at which Wilson takes umbrage, thinking Cameron must not trust his diagnosis. I wouldn't either. Smart Cameron. Cameron points out that they're all on Shitter's radar, and that any prescriptions they write will be questioned by Shitter, so she should see Wilson's patients to make sure she has the answers to any questions he may eventually ask. It's a good point, and it gets her out of puke-searching duty with Chase. Another good point no one has brought up yet is that there have to be other cancer doctors in that hospital who are perfectly capable of writing Wilson's prescriptions. Although it would explain how such a crappy oncologist got to be the head of the department: there were no other oncologists.

Chase chats with the rat/squirrel mascot, who also could possibly be a cat. Honestly, I've seen better mascot costumes at a junior high soccer game. The mascot tells Chase that the week's garbage has been separated into different bins for different days, thereby giving Ralphy's Rumpus, for all its other faults, the most organized trash disposal system I've ever seen. Most places just toss bags into a bin until it's full and move on to the one, but not Ralphy's! Jack's barfing day's trash is covered with flies. Chase asks for a volunteer to help him sort, but none is forthcoming.

Uh oh. Cameron has to sit in on Wilson's patient exams and listen to their sob stories. This isn't going to work out well for anyone concerned. Cancer Beth complains that her new medication is making her feel nauseated and weak, and that she wants to go back to her old medicine, but Wilson claims that she's "doing so much better" on the new medicine even though she's telling him she doesn't feel much better at all and doesn't even have the energy to spend time with her daughter. You'll be spending a lot less time with your daughter if you die of cancer, Beth. Cancer Beth and her Cancer Makeup suddenly resent Cameron's presence in the room. Cancer Beth freaks out, thinking that the reason Wilson needs another doctor in the room is because he got her meds wrong. So now Shitter's actions are causing undue stress to young mothers with cancer. Even if House were the evil drug dealer Shitter wants to convict him of being, would this really be worth it?

Foreman does an LP on Jack while Kama watches. Will is at school, but Kama claims that there was a teacher's-in-service at her school today. (Teacher's-in-service days rule almost as much as snow days, by the way.) Kama offers to help, and Foreman has her push Jack's knees towards his chest while he does the LP. "That's all nurses do?" Kama manages to get out before she is tackled by Evil Nurse Brenda and run through with a sharpened IV pole. Don't disparage her work, Kama. Foreman says that House doesn't trust nurses to do much else, like Foreman's such a trustworthy guy himself. Kama asks Foreman if Jack is going to die. Foreman says that no one's going to die. "No one in the world ever? That's so great," says Kama. Dead parents have made her snarky beyond her years. Kama says she knows that bad things can happen, seeing as her parents totally died in a drunk-driving accident. She'd just like to have some warning before they do. Foreman assures Kama that they are nowhere near her brother's dying. Oh, except for just now when Foreman tries to roll Jack over and in doing so breaks his rib.

Foreman tells House about this while House is in a physical-therapy session, trying to fix the pain in his right shoulder. The physical therapist says that House has been using his cane on the wrong side, and all viewers everywhere who have been complaining about this since the show started airing are temporarily placated. House thinks that Jack's infection has spread to his bones, causing the easy breakage. House also thinks Foreman should prescribe some Vicodin for House. The fact that House asks Foreman to "score" him the drug shows that he has learned absolutely nothing. Foreman will not do this. In between howls of pain from the physical therapist's massage, House manages to tell Foreman to test Jack for osteomyelitis. The physical therapist orders House to rest his shoulder, and to use some "different equipment," taking his cane away.

By Sara M

House is very disappointed to see a soaking-wet Foreman walk into the air-conditioned hallway with Jack's tox screen results, as opposed to a soaking-wet Cameron, because wet t-shirt contests always make for a comfortable work environment. Foreman says that the tox screen was negative, and House swaps his old-man cane with a passing guy's cool metal one. New cane back in his right hand, House tosses the sling away and tells Foreman to give Jack another MRI. House will be looking for Cameron.

House finds Cameron in the locker room. She refuses to write him a Vicodin prescription. House accuses her of being afraid to write his prescription and face the same problems Wilson is. Cameron has no problem admitting this. House tries to appeal to Cameron's sympathy by saying that she will cause House pain if she doesn't give him drugs, and that it's wrong for a doctor to cause pain. This earns him a bottle of Midol. Cameron says that it takes the edge off her PMS, so she's sure it'll work for House. OH!!! Cameron is my GIRL sometimes.

Jack is ready for another MRI of DOOOM! He asks Foreman if he's going to die, and worries about what will happen to his brother and sister. Foreman assures Jack that he'll be fine, and starts up the machine. In the booth, Foreman is amazed that Jack is facing a terminal disease and that his first concern is still for his brother and sister. Then he sees a small tumor on the monitor. The picture shows several more.

Cameron says that Jack must have brain cancer, which compromised his immune system and got him all those diseases. Wow, too bad Shitter put the only cancer doctor at PPTH out of commission. Now Jack is totally screwed! House doesn't have the same respect for Jack's selflessness in the face of death that Foreman does, which leads to Foreman's accusing House of being "pathetic" and a "hypocrite" for only caring about his patients' faults and not about their strengths. Except that House usually only cares about his patients' faults when they lead to a diagnosis. This leads to a discussion about morals and happiness and the dark side of human nature blah blah blah. People yell at House for thinking the worst of people every other episode and this is no different. The only treatment for Jack's brain cancer is radiation, but that will kill off his immune system, so House doesn't want to go there. Instead, he'd rather assume that the spots on the MRI aren't tumors, but pus. Really? There's a big freaking difference between a brain tumor and pus. Those MRIs are absolutely useless. They might as well appoint one of them head of Oncology. House guesses that the antibiotics they've been giving Jack have created a breeding ground for fungus. Foreman says if House is wrong about this, he'll be wasting the little time Jack has left. House says that's okay, since Jack's life of being an eighteen-year-old parent sucks. And if he's right, then Jack can go back to it. It's lose-lose! House tells them to do a brain biopsy and find out if it's cancer or fungus, which you'd think they would do before assuming Jack developed a whole crapload of small brain tumors overnight. With that, House down his last Vicodin.

Cuddy is on House's list of people to get drugs from. He makes her a deal: he'll father her child if she gives him some precious, precious Vicodin. Cuddy is impressed that the Cottages managed to stand up to House's orders. "Yes, their cowardice is inspiring," House agrees. Hee hee hee. Cuddy states the obvious: if the Cottages had written House a prescription, then it would have looked like House had intimidated his employees and gotten him in even more trouble. Cuddy, on the other hand, is House's employer, so she doesn't have this problem. She writes him the prescription, saying that if House doesn't get any drugs, it'll look like he doesn't really need them, which will make Shitter's case stronger. House pronounces Cuddy a "genius" in spite of her cleavage (since we all know that big boobs drains some of the brain's blood supply, thus making well-endowed women stupid), and grabs for the scrip before she can change her mind. Doing so, House winces and has trouble moving his right arm, which does not go unnoticed by the selectively observant Cuddy who didn't notice that House got a new cane. He claims he pulled a muscle training for the Pants Off Dance Off, which I don't think it's fair to mention without letting us see. Cuddy thinks this is another one of House's psychosomatic pains, and asks him what's recently changed in his life to cause it. House has one of his trademark epiphanies, grabs the scrip with his good arm, and takes off.

The Cottages report that House was right about the fungus after all: the spots were abscesses from aspergillus. Good thing they did that test and didn't just assume it was brain cancer, eh? So they know what's wrong with Jack, but they still don't know how he got it. House, of course, has the answer: Jack has a genetic defect in his immune system that has only come forward now because of all the emotional stress Jack's been under with his parents dying. That seems...really far-fetched. But anyway, they can figure out which genetic immune-system defect Jack has based on the infections he's gotten so far, since certain parts of the immune system are especially susceptible to certain infections. While they're doing that, Wilson walks in, needing a Cottage for prescription-writing duties. He's out of luck, though, since House can't spare anyone while his patient is an hour away from death. Wilson storms out without another word. Ha ha ha! He's so weak. If you let people treat you like a doormat, you get treated like a doormat. House and the Cottages narrow Jack's disease down to four possibilities, but Chase points out that genetic testing takes time they don't have. That's okay! House knows another, quicker way to get his answer" he'll expose Jack to the infections each immune disease is most susceptible to and see which infection affects him first. This really only makes sense if all the immune-system problems are equally susceptible to all the related infections, but whatever.

By Sara M

House and Foreman return to Jack's room. House says that they found another bone marrow donor, so Jack can get his transplant without touching a hair on Will's head. House had better hope he's right about this; otherwise, that is a very mean trick to play. Jack won't sign for the transplant, saying that it could kill him and that would leave his brother and sister alone. As opposed to having no immune system, which is totally not a risk at all. House guesses Jack would just rather be hospitalized and "waited on hand and foot" instead of stuck raising two kids. Yeah, because having pus in your brain is so much fun. Jack tries to deny this, but House is right. When Foreman says that Will and Kama need Jack healthy, he explodes, saying he is very aware of that. He's aware of it all the time. He's also too young to be a father to Kama and Will. "Good for you," says House, and leaves the room. Foreman loses his faith in humanity and follows House out. Jack cries. This stuff never happened on Party Of Five.

House tries to make nice with Wilson by inviting him to throw stuff at people off the second-floor balcony. Wilson can't: he's too busy shutting down his practice and referring his patients to other doctors, though. "Oh, good!" says House brightly. He accuses Wilson of overreacting, at which point Wilson finally acts like a human being and starts screaming at House. He says he can't ask his patients to wait because Cameron's boss won't let her come out and play. And since there are no other doctors in all of PPTH, that's what Wilson had to do today. House scoffs that he only kept Wilson waiting for an hour. "THREE HOURS!" Wilson yells, although my closed captioning says "three hos." Hee hee hee. It does manage to spell every medical term correctly though, which is greatly appreciated. "Oh, poor you," says House. "YOU COMMITTED A CRIME!" Wilson screams. He'd better hope Shitter isn't skulking around nearby listening in. House asks if Wilson wants him to turn himself in. "YES! YES! DO SOMETHING!" Wilson begs. He tells House to suck it up and do whatever Shitter wants to get Shitter off Wilson's back -- even if that means getting help for House's Vicodin addiction. "I don't need help," House brats. Wilson kicks House out of his office before it escalates into physical violence. "You're not gonna make me feel guilty about what [Shitter] is doing to us," says House. Wilson laughs bitterly that House already does -- that's why his shoulder hurts. But it's still not enough to make House do the right thing. Wilson says it's obvious that House doesn't care enough about Wilson to help him. That's been obvious for a long time now, Wilson. House leaves, and Wilson tries not to cry. Ha ha ha! I like watching Wilson suffer. This was a fun episode for me.

By Sara M

"The only way to cure me is to make me sicker?" asks Jack. That should just be the name of this show. House whips out a spray consisting of a cocktail of infections, explaining that each one has a fun way of revealing itself as the winner of the Which Genetic Immune Problem Does Jack Have? race. One will cause a seizure. Another will shut down Jack's lungs. The third will give him a heart attack. The fourth will give him the sneezies. "Hell, no," says Jack. House says that their only other option is to guess what Jack has, which means there's a 75% chance Jack's brother and sister will lose yet another loved one. Can't they just stick Jack in a clean room until they get the genetic test results back? Or maybe PPTH has given up on having clean rooms with House around. Jack changes his mind. House sprays him in the face, making sure to keep his own face covered.

The Cottages take turns watching Jack. When Foreman's on duty, Jack's lungs shut down. We have a winna!

Cuddy stops by House's office the morning to inform him that "Li'l Orphan Annie" and "Oliver Twist" slept out in the hallway last night. Um, way to notice this enough to complain to Cuddy about it but not enough to actually help the kids out, there, hospital staff. House says that Jack was too busy having chronic granulomatous disease to get Will and Kama a babysitter. If they can find a bone marrow donor, they'll be able to "reboot" Jack's immune system and make him healthy again. The Cottages are already testing Will and Kama for compatibility. Cuddy has nothing more to yell at House for, so she leaves the room.

Foreman tells Jack that Will is a match. Instead of being happy, Jack is angry that no one asked his consent to test his siblings. He asks Foreman what will happen if he doesn't have the bone marrow transplant. Foreman says that he'll be sick all the time -- too sick to care for his brother and sister. Jack doesn't think Will is old enough to make an educated decision about whether he should put himself at risk -- a risk Foreman says is "to nothing" -- in order to save Jack. Foreman says that Jack's wanting to protect Will over himself is admirable, but it's also impractical, since Will will be a lot less protected if Jack's dead. Jack says that he'll wait until Will turns eighteen before he'll let Will donate his bone marrow.

By Sara M

Back at the office, Foreman thinks Jack is noble. House, of course, thinks Jack is a moron. Foreman once again accuses House of being a hypocrite. He says that evidence and truth are supposed to be all that matters, but then, when House has plenty of evidence that Jack is a good guy who cares more about his brother and sister than he does himself, he still won't believe it. Foreman thinks House would rather believe that all people are selfish and bad. House rises to Foreman's challenge.

By Sara M

Foreman stops by Jack's room, where Jack is telling the kids about their new awesome home in foster care. He says that he'll still see them, but now they'll have a new mom who can actually cook and stuff. Will is sad. Jack is sad. Kama tries to be cool about it, but won't let Jack hug her. Will and Kama leave the room. Outside, Kama tells Foreman she thought he was going to make Jack better. Foreman apologizes for not being perfect.

Foreman returns to Jack's room, where Jack thanks Foreman for not telling Will and Kama the truth. "You're a good kid," says Foreman. He says he believes that in a few months, Jack will realize that he made a mistake, take Will's bone marrow, and take Will and Kama back. And it will suck ass, but it will be worth it. At least, that's what Foreman wants to believe, because he's a people person, unlike House. I don't know why Jack can't get the bone marrow transplant and also decide he can't take care of those kids. It wouldn't make him a bad person. Really, his parents are the bad people for driving drunk and putting themselves in a position to orphan their kids and for not sitting down and making a will that assigned their kids to a guardian who actually could take care of them. I don't think Foreman's being very fair to say that Jack is somehow wrong for realizing that he can't be the parent Will and Kama need him to be.

Wilson has to wait for the bus. A motorcycle pulls up. House and Wilson exchange glances, and House drives off without even offering Wilson a ride home. Ha ha ha!