Jason Biggs shows up as a smirking lawyer who pays for things in cash and whatever, with the Fed up in his piehole for protecting his client, the person who invented Bitcoin. Cue the show taking thirty minutes to explain to Alicia what Bitcoin is, in the confabulated studio-adulterated way the show has of talking about technology, before finally she just throws her hands up in the air and says that Bitcoin makes her feel old.
Also making her feel old is Zach telling Nisa that he loves her, which weirds Alicia out, but then then plays her and Jackie off each other in a really funny, non-jerky way to keep them out of it. I don't know what he thinks he's doing with a girlfriend, I'm so sure Zach has time for a relationship, what with going to high school and his full-time job being the entire IT department of a giant Chicago law firm.
Because Alicia's been up against the Treasury before, and won, Biggs comes to her for help. Balaban is not thrilled to see her, and the legalities of the case are a thicket of whether Bitcoin is a currency or a commodity, whether you are bartering with it versus paying for things with it, etc. I don't know why I'm bothering to explain that part, never mind.
The important thing is that Kalinda spends a lot of time seducing nerds into explaining the internet to her. If you've ever seen a TV show, then you know what the nerds are like in this episode. In the end, somebody invented Bitcoin or something, it doesn't matter, it never matters on this show, although there are some cute almost-smiles between Alicia and Kalinda as they pull a succession of tricks on Balaban that hearkens back to the good old days.
Meanwhile, Elsbeth invites the State's Attorney's Special Prosecutor's Hand-Picked Team of Assistant State's Attorneys to come visit her office -- which is now just a smoking hole in the side of a mountain, without even tables or chairs or walls, and birds flying in and out of it at their leisure -- so she can dick Wendy around some more, and also find out who the judges are in the debt-forgiveness/bribery case Wendy's still building.
Kalinda goes through the files on those three judges, coming up with one case that looks pretty bad: A bench trial that ended up $8M in L/G's favor. Meanwhile, Dana's tasked with acting all bisexual and also scaring the bejesus out of Kalinda, and does a great job with both, producing the conflict waiver from last week's divorce case and threatening Alicia with disbarment if Kalinda doesn't give her something.
Going after Kalinda's feelings about Alicia is just about the sickest/smartest thing WSC has come up with yet, and it's so awesome and plot-devicey, but it's also still somehow shocking how she pretty much immediately turns over the incriminating file. Is she selling out Will to save Alicia? Doubtful; I'm sure in two weeks we'll learn that Will is cool with her handing that file over, or she's giving them just enough rope, or it's about anticipating how they will come after him, etc. Still, pretty chilling.
Two Weeks: Wendy puts Alicia on the stand and asks her if she ever slept with Will, is a thing that will happen. So it seems like the episode is going to be some kind of a bloodbath. In the meantime, let's quietly review what we've learned about Bitcoin, and about making nerds do your bidding.