Episode Report Card Pamie: C+ | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT She Bop, He Bop a-We Bop
By Pamie | Season 5 | Episode 5 | Aired on 10.18.2004
Subject: and still: hating Dean
But loving that Rory is going through a 'Wodehouse phase,' which I always knew she would do, someday, if I watched long enough. Despite the fact that she pronounced it wrong -- it's actually pronounced 'Woodhouse' -- I still loved it.
But, the Dean hate rages on in the Huff household. He must be put out to pasture. Of course, Rory is just going to keep hurting me when she goes out with that jerky rich guy at Yale, who is probably a date-rapist. ALSO, Luke and Dean must never again be in a scene together, because it ruins my fantasy that Luke is very tall.
Back to the show. Richard says he just finished the sixth and final volume of The Decline and Fall of the Roman Empire, a task that has taken him thirty-six years to complete. He says he's had more time on his hands lately, without as many nights out as he used to have. He asks Rory if she's still getting together with Emily that night, which means it is Friday, I guess, and Richard's got a plane to catch, like, now. Richard wonders if Emily has gotten the six-month check-up on her car. It's due, and instead of asking Emily himself, he prefers to send his valet to ask her maid. Rory suggests that he ask her himself. Richard says he doesn't want to be an annoyance, and then changes the subject. He says he found the most horrifying thing on television the other night. And before he can tell us what it is, the scene abruptly ends. I hurt my hand on the cactus closing the kitchen window because I finally figured out how to turn the heat on in this house. It took over an hour. These are the joys of home ownership. I mean, it's just a heating device, and shouldn't be difficult to figure out ("auto," "on," "heat," "cool," etc.). But there are two plastic levers on top -- one red, one blue. I mistakenly figured blue was for cool and red was for heat. Every time I turned on what I thought was the heat, only cool air would blow out. It is also news to me that we have air conditioning, since we were told we didn't, and just finished suffering through the summer months. Anyway, it turns out the red and the blue have to be moved together, creating a window of temperature that the house will heat or cool itself to. All I know is that I turned on the heat about half an hour ago and it hasn't shut itself off yet, so I'm thinking the window theory might have to be...thrown out the window...once my hand heals from hurting it closing the window.
Luke's. Lorelai says she's there for coffee and a gander at her boyfriend. Luke tells her not to pay for the coffee, adding that if she insists, she can't tip him. Lorelai offers to tip him later, and then gives a wink that looks more like she lost a contact. He informs her that it's customary not to tip the proprietor. Lorelai scoffs about how she's been tipping him all these years, and that he owes her a lifetime of 20% back. Luke corrects her, pointing out that she rarely tips 20%, and will sometimes dip lower than 15% if she's mad at him. Lorelai gives a tangential "Hey, Keith" to the Asian server so that we all can start referring to him by the correct name. But I think the man playing Cesar wasn't always the man playing Cesar. Time to bust out my Season 1 DVD. Today is the perfect weather to do so, if I didn't have this recap to finish. You see, I hurt my hand on the kitchen window because I had to close it once I figured out how to turn on the heat, which I had to do because it's really quite cold outside today due to the three constant days of rain we've had in Los Angeles. I don't actually remember ever seeing this much nonstop rain. I am so happy to see it, and I truly appreciate how Los Angeles understands that rain doesn't have to come with all that scary thunder and lightning, like big-dick Texas has to do, showing off every time there's a little precipitation. "Check out my tornado warning, bitches! Yee-HAW! Evil green skies and arm-thick bolts of lightnin', touchin' down just outside your front door because Texas is flat as far as the eye can see! Yeeeee-HA!" California's more like, "Dude. It's so raining for, like, ever. I think I'll make some soup to celebrate the earth's desire to cleanse itself of toxins and impurities."
Lorelai and Dean have an awkward run-in outside Luke's. Dean's on his way to his first job, having picked up some extra work at the second job. Lorelai says she saw him at the inn but that he looked so busy (and by that she means he totally ignored her), and he says she looked busy, too. Lorelai asks how "our girl" is doing. "Rory?" Dean asks, because it is a really weird question for Lorelai to ask, since she sees seven times more Rory than Dean does. Dean says he saw her three days ago ("or a couple days ago," he corrects, for those of us keeping the Stars Hollow timeline), but she seemed fine back then. Wow, their relationship is smoking HOT! Lorelai says she talked to Rory this morning: "So...I win!" They flash blindingly white smiles at each other and again I know that they're more attracted to each other than Dean is to Rory or Lorelai is to Luke. Just make out, already. Give us something! Anything! Lorelai tells Dean to come by the next time he's at the inn, so they can have coffee and chew the fat, even though that sounds disgusting. They both leave the conversation as soon as they can. The only thing that's a bit frustrating about the amount of rain we've had is that I can't mow the lawn. I couldn't mow the lawn over the past two weeks when Stee was out of town because it's impossible for one person to lift the mower up the stairs to mow the back lawn. Also there are stairs coming up the front lawn. This means the lawn is now two weeks overdue for a mowing, and looks like a mess. We're also going out of town starting tomorrow, leaving our home to a houseguest, and it's not like he'd be expected to mow the lawn. This means the lawn will have one month's and a monsoon's worth of growth, ensuring we'll come home to the white trash lawn filled with weeds and toads. Welcome to the all homeowner-griping edition of recapping.