Episode Report Card Couch Baron: B+ | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT I'm Lookin' Out For Angels...
By Couch Baron | Season 1 | Episode 5 | Aired on 02.27.2008
...and after going into the men's room, he ends up on a lovely beach. The water comes in over his shoes, and he kneels down to touch the sand...
...and then Keith comes out of a stall to find Eli kneeling with his fingers on the floor. He stands up and awkwardly sticks out his hand, but when Keith pointedly looks at it, he clumsily retracts it. Heh -- but he's not the only one who needs to wash his hands, no? Anyway, Keith's reaction can be summed up by [eyebrow], so Eli beats a hasty retreat with the knowledge that yet another person in the world thinks he's a freak.
Matt wraps up a call in his headset as he approaches his office, within which is a woman sitting waiting for him. After a mildly fratty comment, they share an affectionate embrace, but then, reading her face, he asks "Jess" what's wrong. Also, he mentions that he's her "only" ex-boyfriend, which is a nice subtle indication of the fact that she, uh, doesn't drive stick anymore. Wow, I just realized I'm less subtle than Matt. Sometimes these recaps lead to unpleasant revelations. But I will try to redeem myself by pointing out that this is another example of interesting character development -- Matt the seemingly uncaring frat boy has a loving friendship with his lesbian ex. Anyway, Matt wonders if Jess being upset has to do with the baby, so Jess tells him that "Donna" is having a breakdown, and she moved out, even though she's pregnant with a fetus that was made with Jess's egg. And why? "My former lesbian lover is now a heterosexual Jesus freak." It's probably not much consolation right now, Jess, but write a book with that title and you're on the New York Times bestseller list. Matt's pretty stunned, but when Jess tells him that Donna's seeking sole custody of the baby and has hired a lawyer, Matt replies, "Well, so have you." Aw.
Hey, Jeffrey Powell is being played by Sars's onetime boyfriend, Rob Nagle! Tom Frost, we'll never forget you, unlike everyone and everything else on What's His Name's Creek. (Of course, you might also remember him as Joel Horowitz in the Everwood episode "The Miracle Of Everwood" -- I love that Berlanti is good about bringing people back. ["And he's still my non-carnal BF. Hi, Rob!" -- Sars]) Maggie shakes his hand warmly and blathers about how she's a big fan and she wrote a paper on one of his strategies and blah, and Powell responds by turning to Eli and accusing him of trying to distract him "with a sycophant." Hee. He bites out that Maggie is the worst kind of lawyer -- "a hypocrite who pretends she cares for the common man while big business heats her pool." Maybe uncalled for, in that he's known her for three seconds, but it really does speak to the continuing question of why she works for the firm she does. I'm waiting to find out that there's some force or divine intervention that guided her to Eli, because otherwise her arc (if you can call it that) makes no sense. (And when I'm calling for divine intervention to make sense of a character, her chances are pretty grim indeed.) Everyone sits down, and Eli and Powell bicker as Maggie elicits exposition by apparently knowing nothing about the case, which is good in an attorney. The salient point is that Powell is missing a key witness named "Stanley Lime," an engineer who used to work for the defendant, "Zyer Motors," and who disappeared right before Powell could depose him five years earlier. Eli counters that it wasn't his responsibility to make the guy appear out of thin air, which I'm guessing is true, and suggests they settle. However, the number on the piece of paper Powell pushes over to him is rather too high for Eli, even though Powell tells him it's half what a jury would award "Adam Mitchell." He goes on, for "Maggie's" benefit, that last time, Adam's injuries were still fresh, and thus Eli was able to convince the judge that the mere sight of Adam would prejudice the jury, so they heard a dry recitation of his testimony. This time, however, they'll be hearing it from the horse's mouth. On cue, Adam gets wheeled in by his wife, and cordially tells Eli that it's nice to see him again. We blessedly skip any mentions of "New Eli" and go straight to the title card.
Eli comes into one of the firm's little research rooms or whatever and finds a bleary-eyed Maggie, who says she stayed all night looking for Lime. Okay, I'm no prude and I happily have never had a day job that required me to wear a suit, but since everyone else at this firm, male or female, does, why does Maggie look like she's on her way to margaritas at an outdoor brunch? Eli sets Maggie straight that she has actual work to do for their side, and reminds her that she volunteered for the assignment. Maggie: "That was before I knew we were working on the side of evil!" Seriously, is she drawn to Eli because she has brain trauma too? Because otherwise, I don't get her being quite this slow on the uptake. She babbles about SUVs that flip over and cripple people, but Eli patiently tells her there's no evidence of that. Maggie says the case is still "yucky," prompting Eli to ask if she got her law degree by watching Legally Blonde a bunch of times. Heh. The rest of Maggie's blathering isn't worth mentioning, so let's skip to the part where Patti comes over and gives Eli shit for not stopping Taylor from working at the firm. Not sure how she thinks he was supposed to influence hiring decisions, particularly since his stock has recently fallen more than Countrywide. Eli basically says this, but for no reason goes on and confesses that he slept with Taylor last week. Patti starts hitting him with a folder again until Martin appears at the door and amusedly clears his throat. Patti pulls herself together and leaves, and Martin tells Eli they've got opening statements in twenty minutes.