In the opening package where they talk about what happened last night, the last line was something like, "Who will stick around and who will disappear?" And when they voiceover said disappear, it was a shot of Maks and Hope and Maks disappeared. Coincidence? Or wishful thinking by the producers?
Justin Bieber! He's here! I am actually slightly scared to make fun of him because I feel like his fans will hunt me down and hurt me. Obviously he's doing something right, because he's got a lot of money and fans. He's not my cup of tea, but I'm about twenty-five years out of his demographic. I'm not surprised that Bruno knows all the words to his song, though. No pro dancers, because Justin is doing his own dancing with his own backup dancers. He does hit one REALLY bad note. Ouch. He also seems to take himself really, really seriously, which is a recipe for a huge downfall in the future. I've watched Behind the Music. I know how that goes.
Ugh, my least favorite segment - what did the studio audience think about the show? At least Carson is doing the interviews, so maybe it will be semi-entertaining. He talks to Jason Biggs, who is game. Bruce Jenner talks some nonsense and then Coco Arquette is adorable. Seriously, could she be cuter? Carson also talks to the judges. Carrie Ann liked Rob's dance, and Bruno admits that a lot of them had very difficult music. Len liked David Arquette and Rob. Carson "forgets" Brooke's name. Seriously, let's just ditch her and hire Carson to do her job. Please?
Who gets the encore? Team Paso, of course, since the judges thought they were the best dancers ever. Okay, I'm going to watch this with an open mind. Well, Hope is still terrible in the opening segment. Rob's solo is horrendous. I can't believe the judges gave him compliments for that. He's confusing keeping his legs straight with passion, and he looks like Frankenstein's monster. Hope's solo is fine, but she doesn't really have much to do. Ricki's shapes are really good, but she had the paso for her solo dance, so of course they are. I really don't get why the judges loved this so much. I hope they feel dumb after watching that mess again.
And we're going to find out some results! Rob and Cheryl had the tango and Cheryl kept shouting "Intense" at Rob. It must have worked, because his attitude and character were right on. During the break, Bruno gave Rob some tips about keeping his butt under, and Rob admits in his confessional that he's always been self-conscious about it. Hey, why is Chaz backstage? Then during Nancy and Tristan's dance, you can hear Tristan trying to get her back into the rhythm. Afterwards, Nancy said that they were "toast" but in her confessional, she said that she liked their jive and she hoped America did too. So what are the results? Ooh, we're going to find out the bottom two this week. And Nancy and Tristan are in the bottom two. No surprise there - they were on the bottom of the leaderboard. Rob and Cheryl are safe.
Brooke is backstage with Nancy, Rob, JR, and their respective partners. Brooke reminds Nancy that she has a 50/50 shot of leaving tonight. Nancy says that those are pretty good odds, and it's not over yet. Brooke asks Rob if he thinks he's the dark horse and he actually cracks a joke about how he's a human, not a horse. It was funnier when he said it. JR agrees that the competition is starting to intensify and then starts singing "Never Say Never." He's at least as good as Justin Bieber.
Inspirational package about a girl who loved to dance, but then had a brain tumor and had to relearn to walk and then dance. So now she's here to dance while Christina Perry sings. And her dance is beautiful. She has such joy in her face and this must be a dream come true for her. I'm usually not one for the People magazine style sob stories, but this is a nice one.
Holy crap. Derek and a female dancer (Allison Holker, an all-star from So You Think You Can Dance) just did a tango with a modern twist and...all I can tell you is that Derek didn't have a shirt and was wearing tight black pants and I could not take my eyes off him. Not in like a sex object way (although he did look pretty good) but in a "that is an amazing specimen of the human body" way. He looks amazing. Oh, the dance was good also.
More results! This time for two couples who are absolutely not going to be in jeopardy: JR and Karina and Ricki and Derek. JR and Karina are up first. Afterwards, Len teased Carrie Ann for giving him a 9 when he and Bruno gave them 8s. JR was a little down after the dance, saying that the "ghost busted [him]." Derek was really talking Ricki through the dance, yelling out, "Left, right, left, right, slow down!" He really does deserve so much credit for their success. Ricki looks really good with the dark red lipstick. She should wear that all the time. Anyway, they're both safe. Duh.
Justin Bieber is back to perform with Boyz II Men. They're doing... a Christmas song? I get that Bieber's new Christmas album just came out today, but isn't this a little early? I feel a little bit bad about ripping on Justin's voice earlier; he sounds really hoarse and probably could have cancelled the appearance and chose to go through with it. Hey, Mark and Chelsie are on hand to do a dance. Chelsie has on high top sneakers which make her legs look totally stumpy. Anyway, I'm a little surprised that NBC let Shawn Stockman go on another network's show, but maybe his appearances as part of the group don't bother them. Anyway, it's a dumb modern holiday song. You will forget it five seconds after you hear it on the radio that your stupid cubicle neighbor puts on the holiday music station starting November 2nd.
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Here's something we all want to relive: Hope and Maks's time together. Except not. They make my stomach hurt. There's so much tension in their interactions now. After getting high praise from the judges for a mediocre performance, Hope and Maks were even more awkward in their confessional. Maks said all the right things but didn't seem sincere. He seems like he's pouting and Hope seems on the verge of tears. Can't we put them out of their misery? David and Kym couldn't find their opening trick seconds before they went on, which was probably distracting, and then their final trick didn't work at all. In the confessional afterwards, David couldn't stop playing with the trick (a scarf that turns into a cane) and it misfired a few times. So who's safe? Hope and Maks. God. Please, no. They had to be on the stupid winning team. Otherwise, they would be totally gone, right? Maks actually looks happy for once. I hope he gets that stick out of his ass and enjoys his time left. Anyway, that means David and Kym are in the bottom two. Boo.
So now it's time for the announcement of who's going home: David and Kym or Nancy and Tristan. And oh, I'm really sad, because David and Kym are going home. I didn't think he would win, but he was definitely a better dancer than either Nancy or Hope. Okay, here's something weird. While David and Kym walk down to talk to Brooke and Tom, the camera focuses on the other dancers going out to congratulation Nancy and Tristan. And Maks is the first to get to Nancy, who gives him a big hug and almost looks like she faints into his arms. When did they become best friends? And why did it look like she fainted? The camera quickly cuts away but that was weird.
David makes a joke and says that "this is my show," so he can't be going home. Brooke gets way too big of a kick out of it. David adds that he wanted to face his fears, and let America get to know him better, and Tom says that he achieved those goals, because everyone in the ballroom was very sad to see him go. After the clip package, David says that he loved getting to know everyone, and it seems like the judges and Brooke and Tom seem genuinely sad. Nancy is crying and I think Maks might be crying. Even Rob looks choked up. Aw, they all obviously loved him. I hope he continues to do well with his sobriety and his career.
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