Last night, the individual dances were good, but the team dances were great, at least according to the judges. But tonight, two couples will be going home. And who gets the encore? Of course, Team Tango. People were complaining that the teams were uneven, but I don't know if that's true. Let's just assume that all of the pros are equal, although I don't know that it's true. The leaders, score-wise, have been Joanna, Mya, Donny, and Aaron. Two of them are on the Paso team and two are on the Tango team. Also, while the scoring losers are both on the same team (Michael and Mark), you probably want the weaker dancers on the team with more people -- then they can hide better during the group segments and have less time for the individual solos. The one argument that might hold water is that the Tango team has better group choreographers in Derek and Louis. I might agree with that. Anyway, the routine is not as good tonight -- I spotted a lot of goofs in the various solos. I don't know if the dancers were less focused because it didn't count, or if the energy is just gone, or what, but Kelly screwed up a lot and Donny had a few goofs too. The kick line near the end still has a lot of impact, though.
Tom reviews last night's events. I think it's interesting that Donny claims to have the flu (which first of all, stop spreading your germs around dude, and stay home) and yet the producers chose not to make it a storyline this week. I'm always interested in which injuries and illnesses get focused on and which ones get glossed over.
So who is safe and who is in the bottom three? Tom reveals that Kelly and Louis are safe. I think she's a fan favorite and it's going to take a real screw-up for her to go home. And in the bottom three are... Mark and Lacey. Hey, Lacey's back! So will she do the dance-off if they make it that far? Did they get to rehearse? Who knows?
Colbie Caillat is there to perform her new single. She really needs to take it up a key or two, because the beginning is way too low. Although when she moves up into her register, it still doesn't sound great. Maybe she's sick? I'm trying to give her the benefit of the doubt. I've never heard her perform live. She also looks about ten years older than her videos I've seen. She's having a rough night. Anyway, while she sings, Alec and Edyta come out and dance. They are a super hot couple. I don't find Alec very attractive, but together they are pretty amazing.
Samantha is backstage with Lacey and Mark as well as Kelly and Louis. She points out that Kelly and Louis will have two individual dances week. Kelly thinks the build-up has been gradual so she thinks she's ready for it. Louis jokes that he'll make Kelly cry in rehearsal some more to get her ready and Kelly vows that she's done being a crybaby. Samantha asks Mark about the dance-off and he says they're ready if they get to do it, and apparently Lacey is going to be the one dancing with him.
Tom is ready to reveal again one couple that is safe and one couple in the bottom three. The couple that is safe is... Donny and Kym. Donny is thrilled; I think he's really sick. He's sweating like crazy. The couple in the bottom three is... Michael and Anna. Well, no shocking results yet.
So then the Ballas Hough Band comes out to perform. Hmm. How do I say this kindly? Oh, forget being kind. They are horrible. First of all, the whole "song" is done in a monotone, and yet it's still autotuned. Like if you can't sing one note successfully without the help of electronics, maybe you shouldn't be a singer. Second, they aren't a band. There's no one playing any instruments; it's just Derek and Mark and a bunch of dancers. The dancing is good, but then call yourselves the Ballas Hough Dance Troupe. I bet little girls would dig it, because they have no taste and like nonthreatening men who sing and dance, but anyone over the age of 14 should be ashamed of themselves if they are "fans" of this group. I think Mark and Derek have spent too much time around yes-men and groupies, and don't have anyone to tell them that this is just a catastrophe. I wonder what they threatened to the producers to get a spot on the show? And finally, I think the song was called "Watch Your Body," but for the first two-thirds, I thought it was called "Wash Your Body," and wondered if I had wandered into a commercial for soap.
Clip package filmed in a parking garage apparently, in which the gist is that no one wants to go home. Then they do a Fight Club thing where they list off the rules, all of which basically boil down to, "Try really hard and practice a lot." Waste of time. Although better than hearing another song from the Ballas Hough band.
Tom and Samantha are back to reveal some more results. Mya and Dmitry are safe. They share a big hug. If only they could bring that connection to the dance floor. Joanna and Derek are also safe. That means Aaron and Karina are in the bottom three again. Aaron looks shocked. Dude, people don't like you. I know that's got to be tough to take, but shouldn't he know that by now?
Everyone is fired up to see Rod Stewart perform. Rod clearly got one of those Kate Gosselin Halloween wigs on clearance and decided to take it out for a spin tonight, because I don't know what is happening with his hair, but it's not good. Although the more I look at it, I think it's his real hair. Ever since I saw Rod's son on Celebrity Rehab and he talked about what a bad father Rod was, I kind of hate him. Also, his voice is totally gone. It's not even like with Tony Bennett, where the voice is kind of gone but you can still hear the good parts. It's just not good. And he really shouldn't try to dance. He seems befuddled by the dancers that come out and provide accompaniment, and after a minute, he just kind of ignores them. I think I will too. I'm also really distracted by the lady in the black mini-dress in the band, who's playing the baritone sax. That thing is nearly as big as she is.
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Clip package about preparing the knock-out dance, and how you never know if you're going to have to do it. And it's scary. Filler, filler, filler.
So now the bottom three are on stage, and we get to find out which couple is going home immediately and which two will perform in the dance off. God, Aaron looks so pissed off. I kind of wish I could find out his uncensored opinion on his performance on this show. Like does he think he's really awesome? He can't complain that the judges are out to get him, given the scores he got last night. I almost feel bad for him, but not really. So who's going home right now? Michael and Anna. Aw. It's deserved, but I will miss him and I think the other dancers will miss him backstage. Tom conducts the exit interview, and Michael seems really emotionally touched. He also somehow brings up the economy? Not sure what that has to do with it. Anna thanks Michael for being a great partner. I don't know if Anna D. will be back season. She turned out to be kind of a dud as a pro, didn't she?
Samantha is backstage with Aaron and Mark and their partners. Aaron has the worst poker face. Mark is at least smiling even as he looks worried. Aaron looks like he's going to throw up.
Mark and Lacey are the first to dance. The clip package reminds us that Mark got terrible scores last night when dancing with Anna. Mark and Lacey have a knockout dance that they prepared last week, and didn't use. Ah, that makes a lot of sense. So they're doing the cha cha cha. It definitely has a lot of energy and they really attack it. There's a lot of gymnastics from Mark, and I'm not crazy about that. They're supposed to be dancing, not having Mark do cartwheels. Mark does well in hold but when he's on his own, he gets a little out of control.
Len thought it was clean, sharp, and top-notch. Hmm. I thought he would be mad about all the tricks. Bruno tells him that the tricks were great, and the little cha cha that was in there was good too. Carrie Ann is relieved that Mark is back, and thought the flow of the dance was effortless.
Aaron and Karina are up . I wonder if they could just do their jive again. I mean, the judges loved it. That's probably against the rules. Aaron and Karina went to rehearsal after last night's show and worked on a different jive. Aaron admits that he's got an advantage if the judges are deciding instead of the viewers. That probably didn't win him any votes from the viewers for week, though. Their jive seems like it's over in just a minute, but you know what? It's really good. And you all know how I feel about Aaron. But it's sharp and clean and totally in sync. I'm feeling it. My only problem with it is Aaron's facial expressions, which bug the crap out of me, but I'll cut him some slack because I'm sure he's got massive adrenaline going right now.
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Bruno can't believe that Aaron is doing a dance-off after his awesome performance last night, but he thinks this jive was just as good. Carrie Ann thought tonight's was better. Me too! Len calls Aaron the Comeback Kid, and he got Len's first 10 of the year last night, and this was just as good. I think Aaron might have it in the bag. And he deserves it, although it kills me to say that.
After the break, it's time to find out which couple is staying. Carrie Ann says that this was a difficult decision and both couples gave top-notch performances. Len doesn't think either couple could have danced any better. Bruno compliments both couples as well. They must be running early or something because what's up with this bullshit. Finally, Len announces that the judges have decided to save...Aaron and Karina, and it was unanimous. Well, we saw the writing on the wall with that one.
So Mark and Lacey are going home. Mark says it was a great experience, and it was really hard, but he loved the bond that he created. Tom compliments Mark for his ability to nail his knockoff dance even though he had such a rough week. Lacey tells Mark, completely insincerely, that he's great and awesome. Man, could Lacey have been less in love with her partner this season? She kind of acted like a dick. I'm going to work on a theory that this season, more than any other, the relationship between the partners makes a different in who stays and who goes. Look for that week after I ruminate a while.
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