Previously: Lester took over the assistant manager position. The new intersect was put online and then exploded. Chuck almost had a chance at a real life. Went on a date with Sarah. Chuck's still the only intersect.
Chuck arrives at work with Casey. Neither looks pleased to be back at the Buy More. They both thought they'd be blowing this pop stand. Casey breaks it down for Chuck in small words. Intersect goes kablooey. Agent Graham is in teeny tiny bits. You've got to suck it up and deal. Your skills at Gears of War will not help you here. He should get used to his fate as a working man. At which point Chuck looks up and sees a banner proclaiming that the Buy More is under new assistant management. Oh no. Someone's gone all power hungry.
Lester is giving a pep talk, spilling everyone's secrets. Morgan likes to reshrink wrap the DVDs he's watched and put them back on the shelves. No more. Only refer to Lester as the boss, Mr. Patel... or, if you're feeling spicy, el jefe. And most importantly, all questions must be addressed to him. Not to Chuck, even though our loveable nerd is the one who actually knows how things work around here. Morgan tries to cheer up a depressed Chuck. He tells him no matter how bad his life is, and how much this dead end job sucks, he gets to go home to Sarah. And there she is, a vision in orange with windblown hair and doing cartwheels and a cat crawl across the floor and gives Chuck a big kiss. But what kind of kiss, a real one or a fake one? Chuck's understandably confused. Of course, it is a matter of national security, but hey, he shouldn't complain.
Over at her Sarah's pristine workplace -- I miss the wiener stand and her cute German uniform -- Chuck suggests a vacation together. Sarah reminds him that it wouldn't be professional. He brings up Bryce. She says that was different because he was an agent. She wasn't tasked with protecting Bryce's well-being. Then Chuck notices they are in a freezer, that leads to a secret underground lair! Awesome. The CIA sprung for some fancy, well-equipped new digs. Much swankier than the Buy More screening room. Guess this means they are sticking around. General Beckman pops up via satellite to tell Chuck that's up to him. The Intersect is kaput. The Cipher is still out there. Sasha Banacheck, former KGB agent and the one-time Julie Cooper, may have it. But she's a tough cookie, she doesn't break under pressure or torture. Only one agent has gotten close, some dude named Roan Montgomery. Casey looks displeased at this info. He used to be Casey's boss and he hated him. Good times. They need Chuck's help, but he says no way. He's out. He doesn't want any more to do with them. He's retiring to his quiet, if degrading life.
Sarah assures the general she can handle this and chases Chuck upstairs. He's not cut out for the extreme lifestyle. She says if they get the cipher, he can get on with chasing his dreams. She basically throws herself in the mix. How can Chuck really say no. She's hot. He looks at the file, sees John Laroquette and flashes to some playboyish lifestyle. He lives in Palm Springs, and he's basically James Bond.
The trio heads off to Palm Springs, at least Chuck ditched his button-down work shirt. Apparently Casey is still miffed because Roan failed him in a class. They get to Montgomery's place, and see that the door is open. The place is trashed, and there appears to be a dead guy under the couch. Nope. He's not dead. Just passed out drunk. And an old-school stewardess with one of those little pillbox hats and a jaunty scarf walks in and is nearly shot. Chuck can't believe his fate is in this man's booze-holding hands. He's doomed to be the intersect forever.
Hooray for catchy theme song! And now we see Awesome and Ellie having breakfast. Awesome wants Ellie to come have a quickie with him in the shower. Chuck starts regurgitating his breakfast. Ellie takes this opportunity to tell Awesome that he's stopped being romantic and they never go on dates any more. Arby's doesn't count. Ellie wishes that her relationship was more like Chuck and Sarah's, because his eyes light up every time he sees her. How is that possible, Ellie wonders? Oh, perhaps because it is just a fake dating scenario, but he's got a bad case of unrequited love. Awesome wants the secret. Chuck says they pretend like they aren't really dating and he has to keep winning her over constantly. Awesome's up for this challenge.
At Montgomery's house, Sarah and Casey are explaining to the General why Montgomery isn't exactly the key to their problems. He's having trouble staying upright, for one. Just then, a dapper-looking Montgomery comes downstairs with advice on how to extract info from Julie Cooper. The General, a.k.a. Diane, is positively swooning. Julie Cooper needs to be seduced, and she can't suspect the guy is an agent.
Lester is passing off work onto Chuck. Casey walks up to the Nerd Herd desk and tells Chuck he needs his services "in a romantic capacity." Chuck prays that Sarah is involved. Sort of. Sarah explains that Chuck's got to woo Julie Cooper. Chuck doesn't think a former KGB agent would pick his dopey self. That's why John Larroquette is here. He's playing Ty Pennington and giving Chuck an Extreme James Bond Makeover. Which includes important information on how to properly drink a martini. Chuck's impressed/horrified and tells Sarah that Montgomery's liver "must look like camouflage."
Awesome is at the Buy More looking for Chuck. Instead he finds Morgan. Awesome explains that he wants Chuck to find another place to be, so he can have a romantic evening with his lady. He actually calls her his lady. In that smarmy kind of way. Morgan bravely asks what this entails. Flowers, candles, jumbo shrimp. Ellie's got shrimp issues. Awesome has only been in love with Ellie for like three years, Morgan's dedicated his life to knowing Ellie factoids. He's the expert and gives Awesome some advice on how to make her dream date.
Montgomery is mixing another martini and assessing his raw material. He asks to see Chuck's opening move. Which involves wiggling eyebrows and finger guns. It makes Sarah giggle. Montgomery says being himself won't work. A hot girl like Sarah would never fall for a guy like Chuck. Sarah says she would. Montgomery doesn't believe it. He forces them to kiss to see this passionate side of Chuck. He gives her a peck. Montgomery says he picked the wrong agent. He'll get Casey to do it. Chuck grabs Sarah and gives her a hot, HOT, HOT kiss. Sarah's befuddled and runs off to fix her lipstick. Montgomery winks and says it doesn't seem like their first time doing that. Chuck tries to play it off professionally, and Montgomery promises lessons on bagging Sarah as well. But first, Julie Cooper. Casey listens on via headphones and is horrified.
Chuck is all suited up, and is putting in an earpiece. Chuck tries to break the ice and tells Sarah that they probably have the strangest relationship in all of LA. Sarah cracks that Morgan is still dating, so it's not that strange. Ha. Love when Sarah's funny. She tells him he should be himself, because it worked on her. Then Montgomery walks in saying he needs protection. Chuck adorably says he doesn't think it is going to get that far. Well, not on the first date, Chuck isn't that kind of boy. Montgomery means the other kind of protection. A gun. Apparently, Julie Cooper is known as the Black Widow because she kills all her dates. Is this because they refuse to buy her popcorn at the movies? Sarah looks a smidge nervous.
Lester is called into Big Mike's office. The displays the boss wanted aren't up, and Lester's trying, but they just aren't listening to him. Big Mike says the people need to fear him. Take a lesson from Animal Planet. Go after the wounded gazelle.
At the swanky party, Chuck's inside, Montgomery and Sarah are outside. Montgomery pointedly tells Sarah it will be a miracle if Chuck survives the night. Was there not another agent available for mission: seduce Julie Cooper? Because Chuck's got all that important intel just roaming around in his brain. It wouldn't be so great if he fell victim to the Black Widow. Anyway, Chuck hears Montgomery's comment on the earpiece and Chuck thanks him on his walkie-talkie watch. Montgomery's going to walk Chuck through his four-pronged seduction, which involves making an entrance then getting her liquored up by bringing her an ice-cold dirty martini with three olives. Charles Carmichael orders her beverage of choice, but Julie Cooper is on the wagon. Julie Cooper heads to the bar where Casey is working. Chuck is discouraged because his date lasted 12 seconds, but the good news is he isn't dead yet.
Then Sarah and Montgomery bicker back and forth about what Chuck should do , be forceful, take a back seat, black, white, whatever. They argue. Chuck moves on to Step 3: Mention St. Tropez. They discuss their love of the Intercontinental hotel, Sarah plies Chuck with some key info, he uses it and embellishes in his own Chuck fashion. Julie Cooper seems intrigued.
Awesome is set for his evening of intense seduction, as planned by Morgan. It includes Richard Marx, a Klondike bar and her favorite movie, Sister Act. Not what she had planned. He says Morgan swore she'd love it. She suggests he call Morgan to enjoy the night instead.
Chuck is trying to handle Julie Cooper at the bar, but in his ear he hears Montgomery and Sarah talking about the feelings that she has for her "asset." Montgomery's martini fries the equipment and Chuck is on his own, without help for the fourth prong. Julie's speaking in foreign languages, Chuck is flummoxed. Julie Cooper walks off. Then the walkie-talkie stuff comes back up, but they are pulling the plug on the mission. Chuck won't hear of it and asks for Step 4, which is to be a bastard, and strides off to confront Julie Cooper.
He tells her she's a fool, gives a great speech about how he's the greatest lover who she's ever known, he's got a private jet, etc... It works. She wants him to take her up to her room and "make mad, passionate sex to me." Ooh. Julie! Then she's grabbing him and kissing him in the elevator, which Sarah sees and causes her to get irrationally jealous.
In Julie Cooper's room, she's slipping into something more comfortable. He spots her big -ass knife, flashes on her murders and runs away. Or tries to, until he sees her bodyguards in the hallway. He tells them, "if the hotel room is rockin', we're probably having sex." Montgomery is going to walk him out of this sticky situation. Of course Montgomery's idea involves Chuck tying a bedsheet around his waist and jumping off a hotel balcony. Not cool. Chuck isn't a "real spy." Too late anyway, Julie Cooper has returned in her little leopard nightie and is ready for some action. Chuck flashes on her medallion. That's what he needs. Julie Cooper is seducing him, but then she whispers in his ear to Roan, telling him he shouldn't have sent a boy. Chuck freaks and tries to get out of there and away from her big knife. He uses his belt to lock the balcony door. She says he has nothing she wants, but that's not true. He grabbed the medallion. See, he's picked up a trick or two along the way! He leaps off the balcony, down to the one, or tries to. When someone kicks him and he screams then lands on a lounge chair in between a relaxing couple.
Chuck's all jazzed. Wants to know if Sarah saw his smooth move, but Julie's got Sarah's mic, and Sarah and Casey. She wants the cipher back, or she'll kill the agents.
Lester is at the Buy More. It's late. Everyone is grumbling. He forces them to respect him by introducing the Wheel of Misfortune. Morgan is up. It lands on "You're Fired." Anna says if Morgan's out, so is she. This leads to a full-on walk out. And Lester cans them all.
Montgomery is sloshed. He informs Chuck that Casey and Sarah are as good as dead. Chuck challenges Roan to be the world's greatest spy. Roan is all about self-preservation. Besides, Roan's not in love with one of the agents. I'm guessing he doesn't mean Casey. Chuck denies it, saying he heard what Sarah said about him being just an asset. Roan paraphrases some Shakespeare, and then asks if Sarah's worth dying for. Yup. Roan says that's against Rule 1 in spy land. But Chuck isn't a spy. And he doesn't think all that much of Roan, who is supposed to be a legend.
The morning, Chuck tries to reach the General, to ask for help. She's unavailable. Then he sees Awesome sleeping on the couch, he screwed up. He's going to make it up to Ellie somehow, he hopes he's not too late. Chuck knows that feeling. Then at the Buy More, it's just Chuck and Lester. Lester begs Chuck for help. The staff returns, thanks to Chuck. Anna negotiates the labor disputes, which means that they get longer lunches, extra bathroom time, and Lester has to spin the wheel. He's got diaper station duty.
Roan is all suited up and he means business. He helps Chuck come up with a plan, that hopefully won't get everyone killed. They send a nerdy guy with a package to throw things off. Chuck tells Julie Cooper a new place to meet, and make sure she's brings the hostages. He's all stern and demanding. Go Chuck! But then she calls back. She needs directions. Roan looks dismayed. Doesn't she have GPS? Julie Cooper, her team of thugs and the hostages arrive at the Buy More. They are welcomed by a virtual Chuck, who's taken over all the TV screens. He's got the cipher, he'll give it to her when his friends are out of the store. But into the frame walks a KGB heavy. Chuck is on the run, he's spry. He makes it up to the roof, and locks the KGB guy out. Julie Cooper says that now that Chuck's cornered on the roof, it's time to kill the hostages. But Roan doesn't take to kindly to that idea. He holds a gun to her head. Even Casey looks impressed. Casey and Roan get free, but Julie Cooper grabs Sarah. Chuck panics, but Roan tells him to remember the story he told him about the bedsheet. Chuck spots Lester's banner, and is skeptical about jumping. Then he sees the distressed Sarah, and says he's got to die sometime, and he knocks Julie Cooper out with his daring swing off the building. Roan says Chuck's a spy.
Big Mike walks up to the building the day and is confused because the banner says "New Ass Man" which is kind of true, because Lester was being a dick. In the super-secret spy cave, the trio talks to the General. Casey and Sarah gush about Chuck's contributions. He's practically blushing. But the General just says thanks for his service and tells them they now can rebuild the intersect with the cipher and he can get back to his life. He interrupts her. He wants more from the government. He's got demands.
At his house, Awesome's trying to apologize to Ellie, but when they walk in, there are flower petals everywhere and a roaring fire, an a nice dinner. She's so excited. It's the dream date Chuck knew Ellie wanted. Awesome is happy too. Chuck tells Sarah it's all thanks to the CIA. She thanks him for saving her life, and says his leap was actually impressive. He's like, "Right?" He tries to flirt by saying he's just an asset, but come on, isn't he kind of cool? She admits she's never seen anyone like him. Montgomery walks out of Casey's apartment and tells him why he failed Casey so many times -- it had nothing to do with him, but rather his hot partner. Sarah scoots off. Roan forces Chuck not to go desperately puppy-dogging after her. He gives him more dating advice, it involves a white dinner jacket, wine and a red rose. Montgomery gets a call from Diane --even the General is getting lucky. Chuck puts on his Roan-approved attire and heads over to Sarah's. He knocks on the door. She opens the door and seems surprised to see him. Chuck is also surprised, because there's a guy there... and it's the one and only Bryce Larkin. Cue crestfallen Chuck. So sad! Roan needs to come back to help out!
Discuss this episode in our forums, then examine our evidence to determine if Chuck is actually a Nerd or Not!