My only comment on the episode: In my dreams, Adam Baldwin would always speak Russian.
At the Buy More, Jeff and (mo)Lester skeeve out by adding the Pita Palace delivery girl's rack to their not-so-secret "Mammary Cam" DVD. Chuck comes over to finger-shake, but is interrupted mid-tsk by Cpt. Awesome. What's interesting is that in the last two episodes tonight, I feel like they've been trying really hard to remind us that Awesome's name is "Devon." Almost as if they plan on retiring the Cpt. Awesome moniker, which would be so NOT awesome. For instance, in this scene, Cpt. Awesome is there to talk to Chuck about Ellie and Chuck responds, "Awesome...to see you, Devon!" I mean, it's not like Cpt. Awesome doesn't know he's called "Cpt. Awesome," right? Even Ellie has called him that to his face, hasn't she? Am I obsessing? Probably, but it's been so long since I've had Chuck to obsess over that I'm just getting it all out. On the other hand, maybe they will retire the Awesome because Cpt. "Devon" Awesome's role is about to get much meatier. As yet, he's just sort of been background, however, my husband's pet theory is that Cpt. Awesome is actually going to turn out to be a secret agent for [insert any three-letter Intelligence Community (IC)]. I elaborate on that theory by saying that Awesome's cover will be blown to Chuck when Chuck's life as the Intersect is in jeopardy (again) and Cpt. Awesome will have to swoop in and save him. AND Awesome will outrank Sarah, Casey, General Beckman, and Director Graham. Finally, Chuck and Cpt. Awesome will then have two shared secrets to keep from Ellie, which presents the awkwardness so necessary in secret-agent shows.
Anyway, Awesome is there to talk to Chuck about Ellie, and he starts meandering on about how he thinks of Chuck as the little brother he never had. Puzzled, Chuck asks, "Don't you have two younger brothers?" "Indeed! Indeed," Awesome grins and goes on about needing "sage wisdom in confusing times." Meanwhile, Chuck's Intersected brain wanders to some device on the back of a rack and he flashes on Livermore, CA, Moscow, wind power, nuclear bomb, Foxboro, MA, and a football stadium. Ah, the Patriots play in Foxboro, and Patriots equal the Patriot Act, and the Patriot Act takes us to Homeland Security. Either that or Tom Brady is a spy and his new hair plugs are actually transmitters. ["I am more than willing to spread that rumor." -- Joe R] While Chuck flashes out, Awesome is still chuntering away. Chuck announces, "It's a bug," eliciting the appropriately jumpy reaction from Awesome. While Awesome is occupied by twitching around and grabbing at his neck, Chuck palms the bug and dashes off to find Casey in order to accuse him of trying to bug him again. (On his way to Casey, Chuck passes by Jeff and (mo)Lester messing about with an outlet and a screwdriver, which, hee!) While Chuck snaps at him to be more careful with his surveillance equipment, Casey examines the bug in a way that makes me think it wasn't he who placed it. However, he doesn't say anything and just tells Chuck to go fix a hard drive.
After geeking out in some video game talk with Morgan, Chuck finds Awesome and continues their conversation. Awesome takes the long way around to asking for Chuck's permission to marry Ellie. Aw, it's sweet. He then whips out a red box and flashes a sizable piece of ice. Heh, they have a cheesy choral, "AHHHH!" to accompany the reveal. Momentarily distracted by the intense v-grade of the diamond, Chuck snaps to recover and quickly and repeatedly gives his permission. up, Awesome wants Chuck to hold onto the ring because if he keeps it in the apartment, "[Ellie] will smell diamond." And the countdown to hijinks involving Chuck's case and losing the ring begins...NOW!
Casey growls over to Weinerlicious and shows Sarah the bug Chuck found. She looks at it and immediately realizes: they have a problem. A quick check-in with their duet of superiors reveals that the bug is a GLG-20 ,"one of the most advanced counter-espionage listening devices in the CIA arsenal." Hearing the bug's origins, Casey snorts, "Figures." The bug's specs keep it to a fairly small area, which means there's a receiver somewhere in the Buy More. Even worse, this particular bug is favored by the FULCRUM agents. To sum it up, the folks who kidnapped Bryce and almost found out about Chuck's Intersection awhile back are lurking somewhere in the Buy More, and Casey and Sarah have 48 hours to find both the receiver and the FULCRUM agent. As Chuck goes into the break room to happily hide the engagement ring, the superiors go on to Casey and Sarah that if they fail in their mission, they will have to relocate Chuck to a secure government facility, and his family will never see him again.
morning. As Big Mike walks through the Buy More into his office, he's reading a magazine and makes what can only be construed as a Britney- or Lindsay-aimed comment about ladies putting "some drawers" on if they don't want people looking at their "private business." So engrossed is he in said privates that Big Mike fails to notice that the Buy More has been stripped clean of all merchandise. His office is similarly bare, and there's a marlin-shaped clean spot on the (apparently) extremely dirty wall. What goes on in Big Mike's office to get the walls that stained? Big Mike reacts to the purloined marlin by falling backwards out of his chair. Whimpering, he finally groks the full extent of the heist. They got away with more than merchandise, too, the counters and display racks are also gone.
Jeff and (mo)Lester hiss back and forth guiltily about making a run for it. Chuck arrives and, after a strangely depressed Morgan gives him the news of the burglary, dashes for the break room to find the engagement ring missing. Of course, Cpt. Awesome phones him at this precise moment to jaw about how he's going to "pop the Q" to Ellie when they're skydiving. Chuck gasps and gabbles and tells Awesome it's a dangerous idea because he might drop the ring. Awesome agrees and hangs up to think of other options. Big Mike has all the employees lined up in the empty Buy More because a Detective Conway thinks the burglary was an inside job and everyone's a suspect. Chuck jumps into line and (mo)Lester continues to act guilty and Jeff continues to threaten his life if he cracks. Big Mike realizes Casey isn't there and sends Chuck off to find him. Chuck calls Casey and babbles about the Buy More heist and his sister's stolen ring, but Casey tells him to "save it for [his] coffee klatch" because they have more important problems, which, I'm sure, will eventually sync up with the Buy More heist.
Down at a hangar, the doors open to Chuck exposing the whole of the stolen Buy More inventory. Wow, that happened sooner than I expected. Because of the bug's origins, they had no choice but to plunder the Buy More in order to figure out who the FULCRUM agent is. Can we call it? Det. Conway? Before getting back to the Buy More and pretending like he knows absolutely nothing about no stolen goods, Chuck wants his sister's ring back. Casey makes a comment about Chuck never seeing his family again, but Sarah drags him off and tells him he can't just do it like that. Casey wonders why Sarah "always has to get [her] lady feelings in involved," but they're interrupted by another agent showing them a Buy More surveillance tape. It shows a drunk Jeff and (mo)Lester turning the security cameras back on -- after the FULCRUM agent turned them off -- and stumbling over boxes which scares off the FULCRUM agent before he or she can steal Big Mike's marlin (where the receiver's hidden), and then stealing the marlin themselves.
Sarah breaks the bad news to Chuck that no ring came up in their inventory. Ooh! Ooh! Maybe Cpt. Awesome is FULCRUM and the receiver is the ring! That's why he tasked Chuck with keeping it safe because he knew Chuck would never think the ring was safe unless it was within twenty feet of his person! He just staged the marlin heist to distract them! Yes! Maybe? After Chuck freaks out more about his sister's ring, Sarah carefully explains that Chuck might be full-time government property in less than a day. Or, as Casey sweetly puts it, "You'll be stored in an underground bunker for so long, you'll forget what fresh air smells like." He shrugs to Sarah, "See? That was gentle!"
There's a funny show bumper where Ryan McPartlin tells us and Zachary Levi that he's used to being Awesome because he studied Awesomeness at an Awesome Academy and was a lieutenant and a sergeant before he was Cpt. Awesome. I wonder if picket lines were crossed for these bumpers or if they were filmed and written long ago.
Bored at the Buy More, Jeff and (mo)Lester engage in a thumb war so awesome that they actually have a mini boxing ring through which they stick their thumbs. The rest of the employees bet until Casey angrily drags Jeff and (mo)Lester off to demand the marlin's whereabouts. After threatening various feet up Jeff's ass, Chuck and Casey explain they saw the theft on the cameras and won't tell Big Mike if they just come clean. Jeff and (mo)Lester zip their lips, so, doing what he does best, Casey gets all threatening. He draws the home theater curtains and tells Chuck to excuse them. Chuck slaps his hands in a clear, "I wash my hands of this" pantomime (awesome, I'm going to start doing that on a daily basis) and makes to leave. Jeff and (mo)Lester start talking, blaming each other. Chuck calms them down and gets the full, deep-fried sampler story. They were at Bennigan's, Jeff got cut off (again), so they decided to dip into Big Mike's private alcho-stash. Flashback: Cameras off, they have the store to themselves. Jeff wants to run around naked, but (mo)Lester pleads, "Don't make me uncomfortable to be around you." In Big Mike's office, the bottle, she is empty. Not wanting to "waste the mission," they decide to steal the marlin. Well, where's the marlin now, boys? (mo)Lester wants to be bribed and gets paid with an ear twist from Casey, so he squeals out that they took it to Chuck's. Chuck and Casey exchange looks as (mo)Lester whimpers, "I'm gonna need lotion."
Even though the supervisors promised 48 hours, they tell Sarah they've decided to extract Chuck immediately. Meanwhile, Chuck and Casey tear his place apart looking for the marlin. Ellie arrives home and pesters them with questions. For once, telling the truth isn't so bad, so they do: they're looking for a really big fish. Ellie rolls her eyes and points out, "Besides, if something really important were going on, you have plenty of people in your life that you can talk to." Chuck grabs Ellie in a tight hug and tells her how much he loves her, "Just in case." "Just in case of what?" Ellie wonders. Yeah, get out of that one, smart guy. "Uh, just in case I can't find the fish," Chuck babbles. Confusing, but true. Ellie now decides to tell them that Morgan came over last night and left with the marlin. Oy!
Buy More. Big Mike and Det. Conway grill Morgan. Turns out, Big Mike doesn't care about the insured merchandise, but the fish cost him $200 on eBay. Really? $200? Morgan snickers that Big Mike bought the fish, "What did you use for bait? PayPal?" Chuck's to be interrogated and he immediately swears that he stole nothing. Big Mike loses it and shines the desk lamp in Chuck's face, screaming, "WHERE'S MY FISH, BARTOWSKI?!"
Meanwhile, Casey is putting the thumbscrews to Morgan and threatening to pluck out every single facial hair until Morgan coughs up the marlin.
Back in the interrogation room, Det. Conway excuses himself to take a call, leaving Chuck to Big Mike's tender mercies. Chuckling nefariously (according to the closed-captioning), Big Mike literally turns up the heat. He cranks the thermostat to 80 degrees and leaves.
After tricking thick-skulled Casey into getting him grape soda -- his "own personal kryptonite" -- Morgan spills the beans. He wanted Chuck's pre-release copy of the video game they were geeking out over earlier, so he stole Chuck's bag from his locker. Mind you, Morgan considers he the two of them to be "life partners," so it's really community property. In the flashback, Morgan arrives at Chuck's to play the video game and finds a "horrible" object in Chuck's bag (Awesome's ring, which Morgan thinks is Chuck's for Sarah) and stops. He can't go on, it's too awful. Casey suggests, "New tactic: you finish the story or I put your head through the wall." "Okay, someone wasn't hugged enough as a child," Morgan decides but does go on. Flashback, again. There he was, staring at "the most horrific object the world has ever seen." He screams the eternal, "NOOOOOO!" bringing Ellie in, so he despondently shows Ellie the ring. In the present, Morgan moroses that he and Ellie bonded over the fact that Chuck didn't include them in "this life decision." Close to exploding with a rainbow of violent growls and teeth, Casey demands to know what this has to do with the fish. Morgan doesn't care about the fish! Not when Chuck's getting married! Casey hisses.
Out in the main part of the Buy More, Pita Girl is perking about it being her 29th delivery, which Chuck connects with 29 placed bugs, disproving all my theories. Sigh. Morgan manages to escape from Casey, because "ooh, lunch!" Chuck then boosts himself through the ceiling of Big Mike's office, scrambles around to other ceilinged parts of the store, and watches Pita Girl eye Morgan as Casey recaptures Morgan for more questioning. Pita Girl now thinks Morgan is the Intersect. Dropping into a back hallway, Chuck pries off the grill of the same heating duct (not outlet, dammit!) Jeff and (mo)Lester were fiddling with earlier and finds a "Boobies! Boobies! Boobies!" DVD. Back in Big Mike's office, Chuck plays the DVD and sees Pita Girl planting a bug. He sends Sarah a quick email -- did you know that even mall food joints have their own web addresses? -- at weinerlicious.com and pockets the DVD. Big Mike returns to his office and continues with the whole interrogation thing. He pretends Chuck revealed all and calls in Casey. With Pita Girl listening in, Morgan tells Jeff and (mo)Lester that he hid the marlin in the Weinerlicious freezer.
Pita Girl arrives at Weinerlicious just as Sarah reads Chuck's email and sees the attached vid of Pita Girl planting the bug. After attempting one tactic of getting into Sarah's freezer (dirty?), Pita Girl pulls a gun and chick fighting ensues. Two skate rats come in, both girls yell, "We're closed!", the skate rats leave, and chick fighting continues. Recovering from a hit, Sarah punches some buttons on the register and a camera scrolls down from the ceiling.
Buy More. Morgan's about to tell Chuck that it's okay for him to propose to Sarah, when Cpt. Awesome calls to say he's going to propose to Ellie via dinner and a molten chocolate cake. Messy! Chuck thinks that's a great idea and wants Cpt. Awesome to promise to take care of Ellie no matter what. Cpt. Awesome acts dim and hangs up, but not before ordering Chuck to have the ring there in two hours. Chuck finally manages to tell Morgan that the ring was for Ellie, not Sarah, and then slaps Morgan into telling him where said ring is. Where else? In the marlin, which is in freezer, which is in Weinerlicious. There might be an old lady swallowing a fly involved as well, but it's too soon to tell. Guess what else is in the freezer in Weinerlicious? Sarah, at gunpoint. She slides the fish over to Pita Girl who then locks her in. Chuck arrives -- how much later, really? -- and finds the marlin broken in half. The ring isn't inside. Chuck freaks. He finds Sarah padlocked in the freezer and freaks some more. Sarah tells him to focus and get the gun she's hidden in the horseradish jar. Chuck seeks, finds, and finally shoots. But the safety's on. He nervously drops the gun and is picking it up just as Det. Conway comes in. Of course, Det. Conway sees the gun and pulls his own. Conway refuses to listen to Chuck's babbles about Sarah being trapped in the freezer and orders Chuck out. Sarah -- who had hidden herself from view because I was right! Conway is bad! -- peers back out of the window.
Casey, who FINALLY gets Morgan to tell him the marlin is at the Weinerlicious, finds the severed marlin and shoots Sarah out of the freezer with one bullet. Casey probably never keeps his safety on. Sarah brings Casey up to speed on Pita Girl and Chuck's abduction.
Cpt. Awesome leaves a gritted-teeth message for Chuck, informing him, "This is not awesome." Hee.
Conway's car. When Conway radios HQ and calls himself "Long Shore," Chuck flashes and realizes Conway is -- ta-da! -- not a cop. Sarah and Casey report to their supervisors about Pita Girl, showing them the video of her karate-chopping the marlin in half and removing the receiver. Sarah asks for more time to take Pita Girl out and to triangulate whomever it was she called after she got the receiver. General Beckman reveals that Conway is CIA, dispatched to extract Chuck. Dude! But I was sorta right, he's still sorta bad! Ooh, wait -- maybe he's a double and using his CIA cover to get Chuck for FULCRUM! Because who else did Pita Girl call? By the way, Casey does not look surprised by this turn of events while Sarah is totally surprised. General Beckman tells Sarah and Casey that their job is to get the FULCRUM agent and forget about Chuck. Casey says, "We're on it," and switches off the interface. "'We,'" he says, looking at Sarah, "Meaning I'll get [Pita Girl] while you find Chuck." YAY! CASEY LOVES CHUCK! Sarah stares at Casey. "Well, don't make me change my mind," Casey grumbles. CASEY LOVES CHUCK!
Chuck discusses his future home with Conway. Conway assures him he's getting a state-of-the-art underground bunker with all sorts of bells and whistles to restrict his freedom. Chuck will even be allowed outside to visit "controlled locations." Although Chuck wants to be able to tell his sister something (anything!) before he disappears, Conway kindly promises it's safer for friends and family if Chuck just disappears. Conway and Chuck wait on a helipad but Sarah shows up, yelling, "Long Shore!" Hey, how did she know his code name thingy? Sarah pulls rank on Conway and tells him they're holding off on the Chuck transfer, pending Casey's FULCRUM capture. Conway retorts if there had been a change, he would have been notified and he has his orders. Sarah begs for more time, Chuck is her asset. She will take full responsibility. Conway eyes both of them. "Please don't do this," Sarah says, TOTALLY REACHING INTO HER BACK WAISTBAND FOR HER GUN! Conway caves and gives them one minute. Pshaw, Casey only needs thirty seconds to save the day! Chuck stammers to Sarah that he's not ready to disappear. She knows. He wants her to talk to Ellie and Morgan and his friends, and if he's supposed to be dead, he wants Sarah to tell them something that will make them feel better about it all. They need to know how much he loves them. All teary, Sarah nods, she can do that for him. "Of course you can," Chuck says, half to himself, "You're Sarah, you can do anything." Aw! Can we DISCUSS how Sarah was ready to SHOOT A FELLOW AGENT for Chuck's freedom? Man, I love this show. Chuck chokes out that the silver lining in all of this is that they won't be working together anymore and can finally go on a date, "You can come to my cell and we can hang out and you can tell me who the president is." Chuck grabs her hands and adds, "And maybe we can find out how we really feel." Conway barks that their time is up. Chuck tells Sarah goodbye -- who is crying now, BY the WAY -- and walks over to Conway. Dude, whatever, Casey's going to be flying that chopper. Right? I have to have hit something in this episode! Sarah calls out to Chuck and says, "I'll save you later." Chuck walks over to Conway, but there's the padded thwomp of a silenced bullet, and Conway goes down. That couldn't have been Sarah because she's doesn't have a silencer on her piece. Ooh! It's Pita Girl! And she's shooting at all of them! Sarah gets her gun shot out of her hand, so they run. Shooty-bang-bang and rooftop running. A really bad actress, Pita Girl babbles about listening to the bug receiver, learning about Intersect-Chuck, and she's being all threatening about it. Chuck offers to surrender so Sarah can run, "I'm going to a cell any way, what's the difference?" One word -- tell him, Sarah: "Torture." Yeah, there will be no surrendering tonight. Pita Girl keeps on with her bad acting and brags that she has Cpt. Awesome's ring. Sarah darts off, ordering Chuck to distract Pita Girl. How? Well, he runs.
...up to the helipad. Come on, Casey -- where are you?! Chuck babbles about negotiating and finally Pita Girl drones, "I have two guns, Chuck, what do you have?" Sarah leaps on her from behind, explaining, "Me!" Chick fight. Chuck shrieks, "Don't break the ring!" Finally, Casey arrives -- not in the chopper because I suck at this game -- all tastied-out in black cat burglar attire and enters the fray. Before he can do much good, Sarah and Pita Girl roll off the helipad and down into a soft pile of garbage. The fight continues in the dumpster. Sarah finally fells Pita Girl with one last punch, causing Casey to smirk, "I had a feeling that girl was dirty."
In a repeat performance of the earlier scene, Big Mike walks into the Buy More so totally absorbed in his reading that he doesn't notice the Buy More has been restocked. He gets to his office, looks up, and sees the duct-taped marlin back on the wall. He smiles, "Norman." Because that's what he named the marlin? Norman the marlin? Cuteness. Only then does Big Mike turn around and see his store full of merchandise. "The power of positive thinking," he smiles.
Back at home, Cpt. Awesome has been up all night with Ellie asleep in his lap. He smiles, "This was an amazing night as it always is with --" He furrows, "But sometimes, I know life isn't always awesome." He continues on in a long-winded proposal vein as Chuck and Sarah search through the garbage for the ring. Sarah tells Chuck they can just buy another ring, but Chuck insists, "It's was Awesome's grandmother's ring, it's going to be my sister's -- even if it's covered in coffee ground and miscellaneous DNA!" Awesome goes on that he has a ring and Chuck's permission, so will Ellie do him the honor of becoming his wife? Ellie snores and turns over to face the camera. Under some baby diapers and in a pan of couscous, Chuck finally finds the ring. He zips home, polishes the ring with his tie, and walks into the living room. Fairly calm, given the circumstances, Awesome gives him a "what gives?" look. Chuck apologizes breathlessly and tosses him the ring, saying, "It might be a little dirty." "Way to go, Chuck," Awesome approves, "I always knew you could handle my family jewels. So to speak." Awesome takes a deep breath. Chuck suggests waking Ellie up by pinching her nose. Awesome stares at him until Chuck gets the picture and makes himself scarce.
Chuck joins Sarah outside the apartment and comments that it will make one hell of a story at their wedding. Sarah glares at him. "Which I'm never allowed to talk about...under fear of death. Understood. I have other material," Chuck admits. Sarah looks sideways at a window and says, "You wanna?" "What, spy?" Chuck asks. It is what they do best. Sarah and Chuck look in the window and see Ellie's excitement. "I couldn't leave them yet," he says. Sarah promises he doesn't have to worry about that, "You're safe." How exactly? I would assume the supervisors just would have sent another extractor. Chuck starts to say that he knows his safety is temporary, but Sarah interrupts him to suggest he go in and congratulate Ellie. He asks her to come in with him, but Sarah shakes her head, "It's family time." "I know," Chuck says. "Well, goodnight," Sarah chokes out. Chuck goes in alone, and Sarah sadly watches the three of them. Casey comes up behind her and growls, "We can only keep him here for so long -- you realize that, don't you?" And the music gets all scary.