By Jacob
Moving right along, aren't we? So Lacy's stoner boyfriend convinces her that, her weird monad beliefs aside, the STO doesn't have her best interests in mind. Like, for just one example, how they're a terrorist army that's just been ordered by the Pope to kill her for having magic robot powers. Six seconds later, Diego orders Odin to kill her, and about five seconds later Lacy's team of teen rebels has proven that not even Diego is sexy enough to survive this show, and taken over the robots to clean house. Look out, Tilly!
Down on Caprica things are just messy. Sam and the Graystones are still prowling the dragon-filled forest, latterly New Cap City, looking for God Mode Zoë. After Sam admits he's only there to kill Tamara, Amanda derezzes him and takes over as expedition leader, afraid he'll take out Zoë too. Once it starts virtually raining, the Graystones suddenly discover the concept of parenting and wait for Zoë to show up, then act all awesome. Zoë says she'll think about being buds with them, but not yet.
Meanwhile, Fidelia's name, already ironic, proves revelatory as well: She's the Guatrau's daughter, and while taking his adorable puppy for walkies convinces him to kill the Adams/Adama brothers for supplying Cylons to the Tauron resistance. A short time later, Duck's ancestor has shown up, garroted Joe for a second, and then gotten stabbed all to shit by Ruth, who was in her day a Ha'la'tha assassin. The family packs up to leave, and once Sam is kicked out of the Matrix by Amanda he heads to meet them and grab fake passports at his club where they played the Tauron rap-rock that time. They're surprised by goons, but Willie -- remember him? -- saves the day. And then apparently dies, of a ricochet bullet. Considering he's the main character of two other TV shows I don't think it will stick.
Clarice and the Willow Boys launch an assault on House Graystone to get the resurrection holoband back, kill Serge all to hell, and end up stymied by various security measures. (Amanda and Daniel are too busy getting attacked by actual dragons to notice any of this, of course.) Nestor burns his beautiful hands and finally the Graystones resurface, just in time to get taken hostage while Amanda lies (maybe) about having hidden the holoband and Daniel stalls, noticing that the first U-87 (the robot body he mistreated so much it committed suicide) is stirring back to life, with a sudden deathbed conversion.
Seconds later Zoë has hopped into her old body, murdered Nestor, and chased off Olaf and Amanda. They meet back up in the virtual Graystone house, where Zoë says she'll hang on a provisional basis, and Daniel invites her to help him build a real body for her. As with all the winky "boxing" and "toaster" and "Cottle," the sudden coinage of "skin job" is as annoying as it is unnecessary, but I'm sure helps justify the awesomeness of this show to some doubting superfans who, undeterred by the great shirt-rending pants-pissing collective breakdown after the Lost finale, still think this show should somehow be related to a whole other show rather than being judged on its own merits.
As an episode it's quite exciting, and well acted as usual, with that Michael Taylor touch that makes all the difference. We see not only literal "dragons" in the unmapped territory of Zoë's (and Philo's) beautiful new world, but also everybody else operating outside of their established territories of bullshit: Daniel actually listening to Amanda, who's actually keeping it together, and both of them actually treating Zoë like a person for once; Lacy assuming control of an actual army of dragons; and best of all, over on the Adams side, you've got Evelyn helping Willie put together his first model ship as a symbol of their new family... And giving him in the process the metaphor that will save not only his life but everybody's, fifty years hence.
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