Head of Household Chima, you'll remember, nominated Russell to get rid of him, and also Lydia, ostensibly to keep her from voting to keep him, as though she's his biggest ally. In the Diary Room, Lydia says she knows Russell is the real target, but she's still worried. As she should be. As for Russell, he obviouses that his alliance with Natalie, Chima, and Jessie is over. You think?
Later, in the kitchen, Russell and Lydia commiserate over both being nominated. Except it sucks more for Russell, because he was the one nominated by his friends, plus he's the one more likely to go home.
But don't forget about the "wizard," which is what the houseguests are calling the secret power of Coup d'Etat, because they don't know what it is or who has it (except for Jeff, who both knows and has it). When Big Brother calls Jeff to the DR, Jessie tells Natalie and Chima that he thinks Jeff has the power. They tell him not to worry about it, but he is wisely not taking anything for granted. Not that there's a whole lot he can do about it. Well, there is one thing: he wants to play and win the Power of Veto to make sure he's safe from the wizard no matter what.
Russell comes into the Have-Not bedcube to offer a deal to Jeff to save him, and later they'll pull together against Jessie or Natalie. Or, as Jeff DRs, "a big dog." I don't think Russell knows about Jeff's power; I think he's just calling on the secret alliance they made a couple of weeks ago. Wait, no, it was just last week. It seems like weeks ago. This is a very long season.
Russell also decides to cover some more bases, and we see him trying to patch things up with Michele. They play pool together, and Russell disavows Ronnie's exit lines. He tries to "clear the air" regarding the whole misunderstanding with Chima and Michele's claim that she wanted him out, but just ends up arguing with her, because he'd rather win an argument than win $500,000. I've known too many people like that. He quotes the five key words she said: "Chima is trying to backdoor you." I know, but it's only five if you count "is trying" as one. Finally she gets tired of it and storms off. Way to smooth things over there, dude. As my friend Bitter says, he mended fences all right -- with a hand grenade.
Michele goes up to report this to Chima and Natalie, and suddenly it's all "girl power" between the three of them. Natalie even draws parallels between Russell's treatment of Michele and Jessie's treatment of Natalie. Yeah, I don't think Jessie's the top in your particular dysfunctional partnership, Natalie. Why don't you go yell at him about Lydia some more?
When Michele comes back out, Russell calls up to her, "What's up, nutcase?" It escalates further and further with the two of them calling each other liars. Thank you Russell, for showing us what a charm offensive looks like without the charm.
The mood's still pretty tense when Chima calls everyone into the living room to draw players for the PoV competition. Chima picks Natalie. Russell gets houseguest's choice and picks Jeff. So much for their secret alliance. Lydia also gets houseguests choice, and picks Kevin, because he'll save her if he wins. Which he won't. Jessie is bitter over not being picked by Russell. He DRs that that's the end of his alliance with Russell. Because I guess he thought it was still going when he agreed to have Chima nominate him for eviction.
The houseguests come out to the backyard, with the PoV players dressed in chicken suits. As host for the competition, Michele explains the rules. They need to use their fingertips to "rescue" eggs from behind some chicken wire, then walk across a plank bridge shaped like a slice of bacon. First one to collect a dozen wins the PoV. It's incredibly tedious not only to do, but also to watch, as they have to thread their fingers through the spaces in the chicken wire to lift the eggs, one by one and inch by inch, all the way up to a hole just big enough to stick one hand through. Kevin gets the first egg, Natalie breaks one, and then Russell and Jeff get their first eggs, followed by Lydia. Natalie drops a second egg, and gets taunted for it by Jeff. She drops her third egg as Kevin gets his second. Big Brother allegedly adds to the difficulty by blowing feathers across the lawn, but I think the only thing made more difficult by that wrinkle is the filming. As the competition stretches on, Kevin, Russell and Lydia continue to be tied for first while Jeff joins Natalie in frustration. Finally, Kevin and Russell have both got only one egg to go, with Kevin in a narrow lead while Russell energetically shit-talks him from the lane over. "He is not good under pressure," Russell understates. But, to my amazement, Kevin ultimately beats Russell by mere seconds. Looks like Lydia's going to be off the block, right? Chima had better start thinking about her replacement nominee right now. But wait, what's this? Kevin tells us in the DR that he'll be thinking about himself. Kevin is awarded the PoV. Russell, meanwhile, DRs that he plans to make some "dramatic moves" to save himself. I can only assume that means more fences and more hand grenades.
Lydia and Kevin are both all excited about his big win, until Kevin tells Lydia he plans to call a meeting to discuss the upcoming veto ceremony. Lydia thinks that using the veto should be a no-brainer, and wonders what he's thinking. Kevin DRs that he wants to avoid making enemies by vetoing Lydia. How does he not realize that leaving Lydia up will make him the biggest enemy of all?
Russell makes a play for Jessie, pulling him into the supply room to tell him that his only way to stay in the house is to keep Russell and get rid of Jeff instead. Jessie's doubtful, especially since Russell didn't pick him for the PoV competition, which he's still pretty pissed about. See Russell. See Russell flail. Flail, Russell, flail.
Jessie then approaches Jeff to ask why he thinks Russell picked him for the PoV. Jessie throws Russell under the bus to try to talk Jeff out of saving Russell in case a) he's thinking about it, and b) in case he also has the power. It's kind of surprising that Jessie is not actually wasting his time here. Well, he is, but two of the premises he is operating on are correct. He's merely failed to take into account the inaccuracy of his third assumption, which is that Jeff c) gives a fuck about Jessie.
Later, Jessie talks to Jordan, telling her the same thing, because he correctly realizes that Jeff's going to tell her if Jessie doesn't. Neither of them believes what Russell told Jessie earlier, but Jordan also doesn't believe Jessie.
Afterwards, Jordan and Jeff discuss outside how nice Jessie suddenly becomes when he thinks one of them might have a secret power. Jordan asks who Jeff thinks she should put up if she wins HoH week. Jeff says he'd love to see Jessie up against Natalie (which is what I suspect he'll do with the Coup d'Etat on Thursday), but given Jordan's likelihood of ever winning HoH, he might as well tell her to put Dr. Will up against Batman. I bet she'd take a crack at it, too.
Russell demonstrates how not to suck up to Chima, getting into an argument with her over shower time. He DRs that he's not going to get her vote anyway, so he might as well not bother. I think he's miscalculating the effect that his poor treatment of one of his housemates will have on others' opinion of him. Again. She blows up at him and calls him one of "America's Top Terrorists." Russell, who I believe is Arab-American (at the very least, the photos of his dad in the HoH room look like Omar Sharif), takes it as a racial remark. But Chima, without backing down, says she is referring to his particular, individual behavior of terrorizing people. The editors even have her back on this, providing a little black-and-white montage of several occasions of Russell screaming at people. The two of them are yelling over each other once again, and I'm 99.832% sure it's for real this time. Finally, it "ends" with Chima telling him he's going home, and Russell calling her out as the true racist. There is not a fence left standing in Los Angeles County.
The "Haves" for the week get to invade the snack-stocked HoH room to watch The Goods. Russell continues sniping at Chima. They watch the movie, while Lydia, Jeff, and Michele are stuck outside working on their tans. I might almost be fooled into seeing this movie, but the fact it's being promoted on Big Brother tells me all I need to know about its likely quality. End of commercial for The Goods.
Later, Lydia tells Russell that Kevin probably isn't going to be using the veto on her, like Russell did. Just to be clear, Russell took Lydia off the block. They commiserate how "everyone's in it for themselves." Unlike Lydia and Russell, of course, who are just looking out for each other. Kevin comes out as Russell goes back in, and asks Lydia if she told him. She's like, yeah, and he has the nerve to get annoyed with her for telling Russell. They go into one of the bedrooms to have it out, and get into a stupid argument. How stupid does it get? After arguing for a while, Kevin tells Lydia he will use the PoV on her, and she tells him not to. What a couple of idiots.
Kevin wonders how to deal with this situation: gamble with Lydia, or save her and risk his relationship with Chima. But honestly, would Chima really be enough of an asshole to begrudge Kevin saving his best friend and closest ally in the house? In a DR, Chima is very serious and very clear that yes, she is exactly that asshole. Although she doesn't use those exact words. Lydia, in the meantime, threatens to reconsider her relationship with Kevin if he doesn't come through for her. Well, it's not like he's ever come through for her before, but then this is the first time he's ever been in a position to. Russell thinks he has a better chance of being struck by lighting inside the house than getting vetoed. I think he's overestimating his chances of getting vetoed.
Kevin calls the PoV meeting. He gives them both a chance to talk him into using the PoV on one of them. Russell goes first, saying he doesn't expect to be vetoed. "Lydia's your friend," he reminds Kevin. Lydia simply says, she loves Kevin, and "It would be nice if you used it on me." Kevin says he's using the veto on... nobody. Christ, what a wuss. He apologies to Lydia, says he hopes she understands (oh, I think we all understand, Kevin), and will talk about it with her later. Lydia looks slapped. In the DR, she demotes him from her "Sugar Bear" to "poopie bear." As for Russell, he's just hoping for the best from the mystery power. Jessie sarcastically thanks America for giving the mystery power to someone else, and laments the unfairness of having to worry during a week when he should be safe. And speaking of the secret power, Jeff reminds us, yet again, "the choice is mine." Doesn't he ever get tired of hearing himself say that?
M. Giant is a Minneapolis-based writer with a wife, a son, and a number of cats that seems to have settled at around two. Learn waaaay too much about him at Velcrometer, follow him on Twitter, or just e-mail him at m.giant[at]gmail.com.