Hey, Julie's here on a Tuesday! Fucked up! Also, I think she might be wearing one of those wig-helmets from Sunday's luxury competition. She brings us up to speed, in case we missed the four minutes of previouslies and don't intend to pay attention to the replay of Sunday's nominations. Which, to be honest, I don't.
After the announcement that Ryan has left only Adam off the block, Sheila quickly hugs Ryan and dashes off to cry. Sharon DRs that she's been nominated five times now, but it isn't yet time to reveal that she's got a secret alliance with Ryan. And Adam feels like he dodged a bullet, but isn't out of the woods yet. I know that's a mixed metaphor, but I don't hold myself to the same linguistic standards when we're talking about Adam.
Sharon goes into the bedroom where Sheila's crying, and promises to get her taken off the block. Why should she do that instead of saving herself? Because she wants to be in the final three with Ryan and Sheila, and she doesn't trust Adam. Ryan comes in to offer a lame apology and ducks back out, while Sharon continues to reassure an inconsolable Sheila.
Out in the front room, Ryan is leaning on Adam to help him get Sheila out of the house. Adam agrees to go along, because he can't afford to do otherwise at this point if he wants to stay in the game. He even says as much in the DR. Ryan goes to Sharon to try to strike a deal to boot Sheila, but Sharon is sticking to her guns on wanting Adam out, and she's starting to make a case that Adam's eviction would be best for Ryan as well.
Adam and Sheila have a one-on-one in which he promises to have her back. Sheila tells Adam to win the PoV and vote Sharon out. At least Sheila realizes that she's not going to win it herself, now that Natalie the Giver isn't around to cut bad deals with any more. Adam promises to do that, because again, his strategy is telling everyone what they want to hear. That strategy is starting to show the strain of eleven weeks of use, however. Things start to get pretty tense, and Sheila warns him that he's got to get his hands dirty if he wants to win the game.
Adam and Sheila get called to the DR to get shackled together, as per the terms of the luxury competition they lost. Adam negotiates their wrist cuffs with an ease that Sheila finds a touch alarming. The cuffs are separated by about sixteen inches of non-stretchable cord -- just long enough, in other words, for one of them to use the toilet while the other waits outside. I was wondering about that. I still expect they'll have to wear the same clothes for 24 hours. Anyway, Ryan loves this outcome for what he calls the house's "dysfunctional marriage," with unwitting aptitude.
Then there's a funny little montage of Adam using his new toy to irritate the person on the other end of it: Sheila sits on a chair with Adam while he tugs repeatedly on the cord. He keeps doing things like not moving while she tries to cross the room for a mug, and purposely getting them tangled up. "Could you please win PoV and get his ass out?" Sheila complains to an amused Ryan. "I'll think about it," Ryan chuckles.
Julie welcomes us back for the PoV, but first! Sheila and Adam are in bed together (with the night-vision showing off Sheila's skimpy underwear to fluorescent effect), and Sheila gets up to see if Sharon's in her bed in the room. Seeing she isn't, she and Adam suspect that she's plotting something with Ryan. Which is more or less what's happening, upstairs in the HoH room. Sharon is suspicious of Sheila's bond with Adam, and explains to Ryan why they need to break up the couple. Meanwhile, Sheila is whispering to Adam, "I can see you winning this game, Adam. We could to amazing stuff with this money. Do you understand? We are deserving, you and I both." Adam completely agrees, because that's what he does, and the only thing scarier than Sheila is Sheila in Lady Macbeth mode.
day, Adam and Sheila get called back to the DR to get unshackled. Which they do. The first thing Sheila does with her freed-up arms is, of course, hug Adam.
PoV. The yard is divided up into four sections with high walls. Since there's a horse-racing theme, each player will have to hang a photo of a jury member on a headless jockey, along with two facts about that jury member. They have to do this for each of the five jury members so far, in order, and the one to finish first wins PoV.
Here we go. Ryan DRs that he wants to win, to hold onto the power. Sheila DRs that she or Adam has to win, and she hopes he has her back like she has his. Adam thinks he'll stay, as long as Sharon doesn't win this one. But Sharon thinks her worst-case scenario is for Adam or Sheila to win, since she believes they'll stick together. Anyway, the game goes on roughly interminably. The walls not only serve to keep the players from cheating off of each other, it also allows the editors to cut it together any way they want to make it seem close. Not that they do that, because Ryan wins the PoV by what looks like a fairly wide margin.
Sheila DRs that she doesn't know what's happening . Sharon DRs that her only hope is for Ryan to come through for his secret ally. Adam realizes that he's either on the block or the deciding vote. And Ryan congratulates himself on his position of power, which he thinks makes his butt totally kissworthy. I sort of miss the days when there were too many players to get everyone's DR reaction to every event, but being this close to the end more than makes up for it.
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After the ads, Julie tells us some stuff we already know before putting us back in the house. Ryan is cajoling and coaxing and threatening Adam to vote Sheila out, but is doubting whether he can trust him.
Later, Adam asks Sharon for advice, as though she's a disinterested party here. He even offers to promise to keep her if she promises to keep him in return. Sharon declines, which arouses Adam's suspicions that something's up between Sharon and Ryan. Otherwise, why wouldn't she take the deal? Sharon looks worried for the first time I can remember.
Sharon goes to Ryan to report this, and now they're both less trusting of Adam than ever before. Meanwhile, Sheila goes to Adam to once again lean on him to keep Sheila, because Sheila will keep Adam but Sharon wouldn't. She gets tearful as she reminds him that she's had his back all along. Having said her piece, she leaves him to return to his Bible study, which he resumes as though nothing just happened.
Adam goes up to see Ryan, who's all "J'accuse!" Although not in so many words. He's all righteously indignant about Adam making secret deals with Sharon, because after all, that's Ryan's job. Adam denies everything, so inarticulately that everything he says is subtitled for a while. Ryan isn't convinced that Adam hasn't been trying to cut deals behind his back, although he loses a bit of steam when Adam tries to turn it around on him. Nothing gets resolved, because we've got to maintain the suspense and also it's time to sell stuff.
After the ads, Julie gets the houseguests live on the viewscreen and asks Ryan if it's dangerous for him to hold all this power. That's the least of Ryan's worries, which he more or less says. Julie congratulates Sharon on breaking a Big Brother record: she's the first player who's ever been nominated five times in a row. When asked how she's managed to stick around so long, Sharon just talks about her faith in her houseguests. Julie asks Sheila why she was so upset about being shackled to Adam, and she doesn't spare Adam's feelings when she answers. For Adam's part, he slurs out a non-answer. And with that, we're off to commercials again.
Coming back, Julie announces the Veto meeting, which happens now, live. Ryan opts not to change his nominations. Julie opens the floor to the nominees, letting Sharon go first. The walking macro stands and gives her usual speech. Sheila tries to be fatalistic as well, but it isn't too convincing, what with all the crying she's barely not doing. So it's time for Adam to vote, and he votes to evict Sharon. Dude, Ryan is going to be pissed.
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Sheila breaks down, and Sharon takes off in her usual sunny mood. It's kind of refreshing, actually: she refuses to make this a big moment. Seriously, she's less upset than I get when my cat farts. After she's gone, the three remaining houseguests immediately split up to change clothes, so clearly they've already been briefed on the HoH competition.
Sharon's Chenterview is almost eerily cheery and clear-eyed. She says that Ryan misplaced his faith in Adam, and predicts that Adam and Sheila will stick together to the end. Julie remarks on Sharon's apparent confidence in the face of her six total nominations, and asks where it comes from. Apparently Julie has failed to notice that Sharon doesn't get upset about anything, ever. But to answer Julie's question, Sharon said that she never knew what was going to happen. Well, okay, then.
Farewell messages. Adam tells Sharon she's been through the ringer, but he's got to look out for his partner. Ryan says he doesn't understand why Sharon is out there, and this wasn't his plan. Sheila tells Sharon that she's taught her what a good Christian is, and will one day make a great wife or mother. Julie's last question? Her future with Jacob. Sharon says she would like to try to make it work. Okay, I'm disappointed that she got booted, but her wanting to get back with that douche disappoints me even more.
HoH competition time. Ryan, Adam, and Sheila head out to the back yard while Julie explains some stuff, but it's complicated and the audio cuts out, so I can't really catch all of it. I do know that Ryan gets to play even though he was just HoH. Apparently without having to be told, the three houseguests wade across the pond, strap themselves onto kneeboards on a wet, slanted tarp, and grab onto a tow rope attached to the rock formation in front of them. Water starts rushing at them, and the surface is angled up higher to about twenty degrees. They're all quickly soaked from the shoulders down. Julie calls the beginning of the competition, and they commence hanging. Looks like another endurance competition.
Julie brings us back just long enough to show us that it's now raining. The final HoH will be named tomorrow, and decide on the last eviction. I certainly am enjoying all these lasts.
M. Giant is a Minneapolis-based writer with a wife, a son, and a number of cats that seems to have settled at around two. Learn waaaay too much about him at Velcrometer, or just e-mail him at m.giant[at]gmail.com
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