Props to Glark, because it's about time I got to do a post-apocalyptic show.
Previously, the Cylons looked in a mirror and said, "The hell?" So they tried to wipe out the people who'd made them look so goofy, and redesigned themselves as totally hot babes. And rather less hot dudes. Full disclosure: I remember very little of the original show. I think, even in my geeky family, it was not a particular favorite. I mean, I remember my brother's Space: 1999 toys, but almost nothing of Battlestar Galactica. So I'm cool with all the changes, but I confess that I am kind of bummed that the intro doesn't mention the Toltecs. Because "Toltecs" is a fun word to say.
Reveille on the Galactica. Tigh has a wake-up shot of whiskey. Save some for when you're recapping! Oh, wait, that's me.
Tigh arrives in the briefing room, where Tyrol reports on the water they discovered in the last episode. The ocean is actually salt water, but the moon is cold enough that there's plenty of ice they can use. Tigh is jolly and digressing all over the place and...well, tipsy, as he says there are water riots among the civilians. That seems like something we should be hearing more about. Or, just possibly, seeing. Tyrol and Cally trade a few near-eyerolls at Tigh's babbling, and Cally stifles a giggle. Eventually, Tigh winds his way back to the point, and Tyrol shares his cunning plan for the melting the ice and transporting it to the ship. Among the elements: one thousand men. Tigh asks, "Where are they gonna come from?"
Cut to the Prez, saying, "Slave labor?" Adama explains that the work is hard, and dangerous, and not for civilians. And so the guys on the prison ship are a natural choice. Er, yeah, that's a little shaky, ethically speaking. Apollo chimes in that the prisoners might like to get out of their cells for a while. The Prez says that if the men volunteer, cool, but adds, "These men are not slaves, and I will not have them treated as such." Apollo suggests offering "points toward earning freedom" as an incentive. Wow, he's a born bureaucrat. Why not just offer them better accommodations, or go with a vague "It'll be noted favorably." I mean, points? Can they turn in gum wrappers, too? Oh well. Adama's wary of releasing the prisoners at all, but Apollo says they were on their way to parole hearings, which suggests that they might be ready for release anyway. Remember that: I'll complain about it later. Adama makes a noise that captioning describes as "[scoffs]." I'd say it was more "[snorts]," myself. The Prez approves Apollo's plan, and asks Billy to help screen out the "hardened criminals." Yeah, Billy's the guy for that job. Adama wants someone from the Galactica along to review security. Billy suggests Dualla, and they don't actually start shouting "Billy likes Dualla!" but I bet they want to. Adama approves of Dualla, but adds that he'd also like someone from the ground crew to make sure the prisoners can operate the equipment they'll be using. That settled, the Prez starts to leave, but Billy prompts her, "The doctor?" The Prez sighs, and asks if there's a doctor aboard, claiming to have allergies. Adama says he'll send the doctor her way, and does not add, "You're on a spaceship. What is there to be allergic to?" He's polite.
The Prez and Billy pedeconference, and she pretty much does that "Billy likes Dualla!" thing. Told you so.
In another corridor, or so we'll pretend, Apollo's tagging along behind Adama, and asks if Adama has something to say. Adama sniffs, "I have nothing to say to the personal representative of the President." Jeez. Adama lectures Apollo about how a man has to decide which side he's on. Apollo says he didn't know there were sides, and stomps off. Adama tells the empty hall, "That's why you haven't picked one yet." Hey, Adama? Maybe Apollo's trying to keep it from becoming about sides. Preparing for battle tends to ensure that you have one. Adama only seems like a jerk when he's dealing with Apollo. Which I can see happening, and it does help make Apollo more sympathetic, but I really hope some other character comments on that fact eventually.
Cut to the prison transport, the Astral Queen. Wilkins, the ship's captain, tells Apollo, "I'm a bus driver, not a warden." Heh. Not quite as catchy as "I'm a doctor, not a bricklayer," but I'll take it. Wilkins adds that there are 1,500 prisoners aboard, and that he doesn't carry any records about them aboard. Which seems kind of insane. They're going to parole hearings. There's no paperwork at all? For that matter, they're being transported to a parole hearing from a different planet? Or something? Over a thousand at a time? How can that possibly be more efficient than transporting the parole board to the prison, wherever it is? I don't know; maybe the Cylons have a point. Whatever. Wilkins leads Apollo to the PA. Apollo introduces himself to the prisoners as the President's representative, and explains the situation as we pan over the cells. The prisoners are two to a cell, and the cells are like fifteen square feet. They've been in there for almost two weeks? I say again, the Cylons may have a point. Apollo makes his pitch for "freedom points," oy, and says that the men can volunteer by stepping out of their cells. The guards pull some levers that unlock and open the cell doors. No one steps out for a long minute, and then one man does. We zoom in and see that it's special guest star Crazy Richard Hatch, who says, "Thank you for your offer. We respectfully decline." Billy gasps, and identifies Crazy Richard Hatch as Tom Zarek. Dualla peers down and asks, "The terrorist?" The prisoners begin to chant, "Zarek!" and pound on their cells. From now on, when Scooter sits with his paws propped up on the bars of his cage, I'm going to pretend he's saying "Zarek!" instead of "Attica!"
Credits. Spaceships. Explosions. Spaceships. Explosions. Spaceships. Explosions. I like it. It speaks to me. The music's a nice incidental piece, but not much of a theme song. You should be able to hum a theme song, damn it. For the sake of trivia contests, if nothing else. I dig the blipvert of scenes from the current episode at the end, though.
When we return, Wilkins helps us out by asking who Zarek is. Billy says, "He's a freedom fighter. He's a prisoner of conscience." Deanna snorts, "He's a butcher." Billy argues that Zarek's people were being exploited, but Deanna says, "I'm from Sagitarron. That man does not speak for all of us. He blew up a government building." Billy pshaws. Cally tells Apollo that if the prisoners have refused, they should move on. But Apollo wants to try making his case directly to Zarek. He really thinks that "freedom points" thing is going to be a hit, doesn't he?
Caprica. A caption helpfully informs us that it's been twelve days since the attack. Helo and Boomer have reached a deserted city. Or "the" deserted city. I'm unclear. Helo shouts for help until Boomer asks him to hush up. Helo says, "Feel like I'm in a movie," heh. 28 Days Later... does leap to mind. If this show had zombies, it would be perfect. Well, and pirates. Boomer rather dopily wonders where everyone is, and Helo suggests, "Some are dead." The captions read, "Somewhere dead," which is a much funnier answer, but I don't think that's what he actually said. Helo figures that those who survived long enough to flee did. And died somewhere else. A noise attracts their attention to a corpse rats are feeding on. Boomer gags for a bit until Helo suggests that they find a hospital and look for more anti-radiation meds. "We've only got two days' worth left," he expositions, and then reassures her that someone must be watching out for them.
Pan up to a rooftop, where Six and Leisure Suit Larry are doing just that. Larry admires Boomer's technique, and Six sniffs such that Larry wonders if she's jealous. Six looks at the cityscape and says, "This all makes me so sad." Larry insists, "They would have destroyed themselves anyway. They deserved what they got." Six says, "We're the children of humanity. That makes them our parents, in a sense." Way to be redundant, Six. Maybe the Cylons wiped everyone out for giving them lines Ed Wood would have tossed out. This show's had good dialogue, for the most part, but wow. Larry says that in order for children to "come into their own," parents have to die. Okay, new theory: maybe the Cylons watched too much Babylon 5?
A guard opens Zarek's cell for Apollo, and Zarek resignedly stands and puts his hands behind his head. Apollo tells Zarek that he wants to talk. Zarek says, "Guard, Prisoner requests permission to speak with his visitor." The guard grants it. Zarek tells Apollo that he's not allowed to speak except to respond to a direct question, and sneers, "You've never been in a prison before, have you, Captain?" Apollo allows that he hasn't, and enters the cell as Zarek takes a seat.
The guard relocks the cell and strolls down the aisle, passing a guy we'll eventually find out is named Mason, although I like to think of him as Scummy McRaperson. Not to give anything away. Mason knocks his hand against the cell, as if signaling something.
Apollo tells Zarek that they need help from Zarek's men. Zarek's all, "They're not my men. They belong to you. You own us."
As the guard continues his rounds, other prisoners knock on their bars.
Apollo tries playing good cop, and says that he admires Zarek's principles. He adds, "You magnificent bastard, I read your book!" Except for the first part. Zarek asks, "The book that had to be smuggled out of labor camp because stumps aren't allowed freedom of expression?" Apollo fanboys that the book made him rethink some things, and notes that he read it even though it was banned. I've got to think that making a big thing about reading a banned book isn't going to make a huge impression on the guy who's been imprisoned for two decades. But I kind of enjoy Apollo's naiveté. Having established what he think is a sympathetic connection, Apollo explains that people will die if they don't get water soon.
The guard from before goes upstairs and tells another guard, "It's time for your break." And then Guard #1 clobbers Guard #2 and knocks him out, then turns off the cameras monitoring the prisoners. Ruh-roh.
Wilkins watches his monitors fill with static while Deanna and Billy continue arguing about Zarek.
Apollo puts on his sincere puppy-dog face as he tells Zarek that they're offering the prisoners a chance to earn their freedom. Zarek nods, "Now you've said the truth. Freedom is earned." I think Zarek took way too many Sociology classes. Listen, dude, you don't have to earn freedom, but it might get taken away if you, oh, I don't know, blow up buildings as a half-assed political protest.
The guard opens up a row of cells, and the prisoners begin to stream out. Apollo starts to look around at the noise, and Zarek reassures him, "Stay where you are, Captain. It'll all be over soon."
Wilkins is still puzzling over his monitors when the door opens and the guard enters, along with several armed prisoners.
The cells on Zarek's aisle are opened, and when the prisoners there exit, Apollo jumps out and, seriously, tries to beat them all up by himself. Ha! He does okay for a minute or so, but pretty soon he's tackled and it's all over but the pummeling. Apollo's a nice boy, but not the brightest. Zarek reclines on his cot contemplatively.
After the ads, Apollo returns to consciousness to find several armed prisoners standing over him. The Evil Guard is reporting to Zarek that the guards and ship's crew have been placed in cells. Zarek svengalis, "I knew I could count on you."
Dualla and Billy are put in neighboring cells by the prisoners. Dualla tells Billy to "stay frosty." Yay for Aliens shout-outs! From another cell nearby, Cally insists that the prisoners don't want to hurt them: "That won't get them what they want." Billy asks, "Which is what?" I'm guessing cocoa, personally.
Galactica. Baltar is wandering around, probably asking if anyone needs to borrow a cup of crazy. He runs into Starbuck and Boxey, and says it's nice to see her. Starbuck coos, "Good to see you, too!" Baltar says, "Really?" which is a little bit odd, but then again, so he is he. Starbuck, in the same seductive tone: "No!" She and Boxey trade giggling high fives as they move on. Baltar just looks confused. Hee. But then Six, wearing a negligee, says "Aw" in his ear. Baltar wonders if Starbuck's a natural blonde. Six says, "I doubt it." I wonder if Six's nightgown should be considered Cylongerie. Sorry.
Boxey lights Starbuck's cigar for her as she prepares to play CAG for the troops. Starbuck rhetorically asks who's been screwing up their landings, and Boxey identifies a pilot called Flat-Top. Starbuck asks Flat-Top if he's got "a need for speed," and Flat-Top does some passable Tom Cruise-ish banter. Tigh watches from the back of the room as Starbuck makes a few masturbation jokes at Flat-Top's expense, then concludes, "You've been a great audience -- dismissed." The troops file out as Tigh walks up and berates Starbuck for smoking in the Ready Room. Starbuck replies, "My room, my rules." Tigh asks Boxey where his mom is, and Boxey not-at-all-cutely snaps, "Dead. Where's yours?" Ha! I might like him after all. Tigh ignores that and says that he's looking for Boomer. Boxey growls that Boomer's in the tool room, and exits. Tigh lectures Starbuck about how to mind the troops, and tells her, "You're right on the edge, Thrace. Careful you don't fall off." Starbuck leans in to sniff Tigh's breath and responds, "Speaking of falling off...glad to see you finally found a way to quench your thirst." And off she goes.
Astral Queen. Zarek and Apollo are hanging out in the control room, or bridge, or whatever. I assume that Apollo is handcuffed or secured somehow, although I can't tell since he's always in close-up in this scene. Apollo says, "They won't negotiate while you're holding hostages." Zarek says that he's not trying negotiate, he just wants a little prison reform. Then he adds, "Finally, I have something to bargain with." See, he's not negotiating, he's bargaining. It's totally different. Zarek finally sits down facing Apollo and says that they're going to talk about Adama.
Galactica. Baltar has loonied his way to Adama's quarters, where he's admiring the paintings. First we heard about Adama's taste in books, now it's his paintings. Let us consider it established that Adama has layers. Adama offers Baltar some water and cuts to the chase: "Where's my Cylon detector?" Baltar admits that he's having some trouble. Six encouragingly says, "It's not working this time, Gaius. He can see right through you." Baltar burbles that the the lack of proper facilities and the water shortage are delaying things, until Adama cuts him off and says, "You said you had a way of detecting human from Cylon. Do you, or don't you?" Baltar gulps and confesses, "I don't." Six shrieks, "What?!" Baltar babbles that he's not cut out for this, and that his subconscious is sabotaging him, and this seems like a good time to mention that I'm always impressed when actors ignore each other. I mean, Olmos and the rest of the cast do these scenes where Six is slinking about, and they ignore her so totally that I forget they're actually able see her. It might be particularly impressive here, since Six is wearing a silk nightgown as she walks within inches of Olmos. Where was I? Six says that Baltar's got to tell Adama what he wants to hear, because otherwise, "they're going to find [him] out, and tear [his] head off, and throw [his] body out of an airlock!" She shouts this last bit in Baltar's face. Baltar yelps (captioned, "Woo!") and drops his glass, which shatters on the floor. Baltar excuses himself to a baleful Adama, and says he hasn't had much sleep. Adama cooly notes that Baltar is the only man they have who can do this: "So what's the game plan, doc?" Six instructs Baltar to say there is one way he can help. Baltar tries to shush Six, but gives in when she starts shouting again. She prompts him to say, "I didn't want to have to ask you for this, but what I really need to complete this project is --" Six concludes, "A nuclear warhead." Baltar boggles a little but goes with it.
Zarek asks if Apollo got his gig as the Prez's rep because of his father. "Hardly," Apollo replies. Zarek quickly spots the "daddy issues" chip on Apollo's soldier. Apollo notes that he and his dad are agreed about not making deals with terrorists. Zarek, faux-hurt, says he thought Apollo read his book. Apollo allows that taking hostages might have changed his opinion. Zarek chuckles, "It's always better when the oppressed don't fight back, isn't it?" Well, it's better when the oppressed direct their fight at the actual oppressors, and not at random passersby, dude.
Adama repeats, "A warhead." Six prompts Baltar to explain that he needs the plutonium, then says, "Figure out the rest for yourself." Left hanging, Baltar does a pretty good job of explaining that the Cylons are susceptible to radiation, so he can encase the plutonium in some technobabble that I don't really care about. It sounded convincing, though. Adama rasps that they only have five nukes left. Baltar says that he understands if his project isn't a top priority, but Adama pours the rest of his glass of water back into a carafe and says, "You'll get your warhead." Six coos, "Good boy," at Baltar. Baltar says "Thank you" in the general direction of Six and Adama. And then adds, "Commander," to clarify. Heh.
In the tool room, Tyrol tells Boomer that they can't find any clues as to who planted the explosives from the last episode. Boomer gets panicky again, and Tyrol gives her a comforting hug and kiss. And then Tigh enters, asking to speak to Boomer. Tyrol makes himself scarce. Tigh asks whether Boomer think she's fooled anyone, and the room is filled with dramatic irony as Tigh says, "I know. The old man knows. Hell, the whole ship knows about you and the Chief." He orders her to end the relationship with Tyrol. "We're at war, this is a combat unit, and you're his superior officer." Boomer nods, and then Tigh is called to CIC. Which I'm bound to type as "C&C" eventually, so watch for that.
CIC. Zarek is broadcasting his demands. He wants the Prez and her staff to resign, and for the fleet to hold elections. Zarek says, "These demands are made not for me, or for the former slaves held on this ship, but for you, the people, the survivors of the holocaust, and the children of humanity's future. I am Tom Zarek, and this is the first day of the new era." He is the lone locust of the apocalypse! Think of him when you look to the night sky! Oh, come on. You were thinking it. Weren't you?
Commercials. I don't know why the Sci-Fi channel has a bad rep when it brings us quality films like Chupacabra: Dark Seas. I mean, come on. It's a story that needs to be told. Hey, did you see that one about the giant snakehead fish roaming the inaccessible wilderness of Maryland? That was genius.
When we return, Adama tells the Prez that they've jammed any further transmissions from the prison ship. The Prez rightly notes, "A little bit late for that." Adama's all "nobody's gonna listen to the crazy terrorist," and the Prez is all, "we're so screwed," and it's nice, because I believe that's how they'd react. The Prez notes that Zarek spent "twenty years in prison over a matter of principle," and points out that there are already riots over the water shortage. Once again, I feel like that should be a bigger factor in this episode. Are the soldiers suppressing the riots? Is it up to each ship to cope? The Prez asks, "When are you going in?" Adama says he thought the Prez would want to talk to Zarek, but she pffts, "There's nothing to talk about. What he wants, I can't give him." Adama finally says that he's not ready to go in, and asks the Prez to stall for him. The Prez grumps that this is playing into Zarek's hands: "He wants to be recognized. He wants his crimes validated." I just adore Mary McDonnell. Not for anything in particular here, but just in general. The Prez adds that her predecessor offered Zarek a full pardon if he'd renounce violence as a means of political change, and Zarek refused. She says there will be no deals. Adama says, "I'll let you know what happens." Well, duh. He hangs up and turns to listen in as Starbuck details her plan to Tigh.
Starbuck is marking up blueprints of the Astral Queen as she describes how she and her team will retake the ship. Tigh isn't keen on having Starbuck involved, and Adama suggests that they let their remaining Marines handle it. Starbuck says, "They don't have a sniper. And with all due respect, sir, I am the best shot, in or out of the cockpit." Tigh says, "She's right. For once." Heh. Adama approves Starbuck's plan, and tells her that if she gets a clear shot at Zarek, she should take it.
Dualla idly wonders how she got this assignment, and Billy confesses that it's his fault, and apologizes. Dualla declares that it's nice to get out and meet new people. She's pretty. I have no real opinion of her beyond that.
Mason sits in the cell to Cally's and says, "You're not asleep." Cally opens her eyes and concedes, "Not anymore." Dualla and Billy watch tensely as Mason asks if Cally is pretending that she's not scared. Cally smirks that she's quite genuinely tired. Mason says that she doesn't know what tired is, which is a nice callback to "33." Cally grunts, "Right," and Mason snaps, "Don't mock me, little girl!" He says that he and Zarek are old pals, so Cally should be nice to him. Cally just snuggles down into her bunk as if she's going back to sleep.
Starbuck heads out with the Marines. Tigh wishes them "good hunting."
In the control room, Zarek is lecturing Apollo about how the Prez wasn't elected legitimately. I wait for Apollo to say, "Dude, it's been twelve days since we were almost annihilated. Not much point in having elections if we all die during the campaign." I suspect I'm going to have to wait a long time for Apollo to think that fast on his feet. The best he can do is to insist, "We need a government. We need rules. We need a leader." Zarek argues, "We need to be free men and women. If we're not free, then we're no different than Cylons." Why do I think that there's a Cylon corollary to Godwin's law? Also, during this scene I realized that Apollo isn't restrained at all. Zarek's way confident. Or way stupid. Or both. Zarek notes that Apollo is one of the Lords of Kobol, and figures that he must be pretty special to rate that kind of callsign. Zarek pontificates, "Son of Zeus, good with a bow, god of the hunt, and also a god of healing." He tells Apollo that a god can reconcile opposing forces, "but a mortal has to pick one side, or the other." Oh, look. It's a theme.
Zarek and Apollo are interrupted by the comm system when Gaeta says that Adama wants to chat. Zarek grunts, "Zeus is calling," which is funny. Zarek moves over to the radio or whatever and asks Adama, "How can I help you?" He does have balls, I'll give him that. Adama wants to make sure everyone's okay, so Zarek waves Apollo over to say hi to daddy. Apollo says that everyone's okay, and starts to mention, "They're located on the lower --" before Zarek shoves him away. Zarek asks Adama, "How long until you storm the ship?" Adama says he doesn't want to do that, but Zarek smugs, "Your men are on their way." Zarek tells Adama that they have to have elections, and Adama nixes that. Zarek concludes, "Then I look forward to meeting your men," and ends the conversation.
The Marines' ships scoot under the Astral Queen, flip over, and attach themselves to the the hull.
Mason opens Cally's cell and steps inside. Cally instantly sits up, wide awake. Dualla and Billy watch. Mason thinks that Cally doesn't respect him, but Cally says that she does. He orders Cally to stand up, and she does. Billy gets as far as shouting, "Hey!" before Mason aims a gun at him. Cally quickly shakes her head at Billy, and then Mason leads her out of the cell. Dualla demands to know what Mason's doing, but he ignores her. Dualla calls reassurances to Cally as Billy shouts for Apollo. Eek.
In the control room, Apollo realizes, "You want them to storm the ship."
The Marines begin to cut through the hull of the Astral Queen.
Apollo continues, "You don't want elections, you don't want your freedom -- you want a bloodbath." He says that Zarek's been forgotten for twenty years, and that this is a chance to "go out in a blaze of glory."
The Marines enter the Astral Queen and move past a prisoner that they've already tied up and gagged. Before he could sound the alarm. Gee, that was lucky.
Zarek enters full-on crazy as he declares, "Once Roslyn uses Adama's soldiers to massacre the people on this ship, prisoners and hostages alike, the people in the fleet will never, never forgive them. The entire government will collapse." Yay?
Marines. Stealth-fu.
Dualla stiffly assures Billy that Cally can take care of herself. She says, "We've all been trained in capture, it's --" and then she's interrupted by a shriek from Cally.
Starbuck halts the Marines briefly at the scream.
Apollo tells Zarek that this isn't about freedom; it's about Zarek's death wish. Then the guard enters asking for Zarek. We can hear Mason screaming faintly outside, and Zarek gasps, "What the hell?" He and Apollo run out.
Upon hearing a gunshot, Starbuck decides that the prisoners are killing the hostages, and orders the Marines to move in.
A prisoner is nabbed by the Marines, and by "nabbed," I might mean "killed." I guess we'll have to wait for the whiteboard to clear that up.
Cut to Mason in a cell, screaming and clutching his very bloody ear. Though it is, unfortunately, still attached. But still, good on Cally. Zarek rushes up and asks what's going on. Mason moans about his ear, and Cally, on a cot in the cell, with blood all over her chin, sobs, "Frak you!" I adore her. She's also been shot in the gut, although she's still able to spit out some ear-bits onto the floor. Apollo grabs Zarek and says, "You said they weren't animals -- what do you call this?" Although the impact of that is somewhat lessened by the fact that I don't remember Zarek making that a big cornerstone in his arguments, honestly. Mason moans about how it's been twenty years, and waves his gun around as Apollo helpfully orders Zarek to "do something!" Zarek snaps, "You put him in a cage, you made him a monster!" No, and also no.
The Marines take out another prisoner.
Mason shrieks, "You all deserve to die!" Then he aims his gun at a sobbing Cally and adds, "You first."
Starbuck reports that she's in position.
For some reason, Apollo still thinks he can argue his way through this. He was all action-hero-guy when that was hopeless, now he's talky-meat when it's too late for that. Like I said, he's a little slow. Zarek sneers, "You reap what you sow." Mason orders Cally to look at him as he aims, and then Apollo punches the prisoner to him, grabs a gun, and blasts Mason. Apollo turns and shoves Zarek onto his knees, the better to shoot his squishy brains.
Apollo just so happens to be neatly blocking Starbuck's shot at Zarek, so she restricts herself to whispering, "C'mon, Lee, take out the son of a bitch." Is this really a good time to make dates? Oh. "take out" with the gun. Gotcha.
Apollo aims at Zarek's nose as he asks if Zarek is still ready to leave this world. Zarek says that he is. Apollo says, "Oh." Well, not quite. He tells Zarek, "You're gonna tell your men to help us get that water off the moon. They're gonna earn their points, and they're gonna work for their freedom, and then -- then you're gonna get your elections." Zarek's a little surprised to hear that, and Apollo goes on to say, "You were right about democracy and the consent of the people. I believe in those things, and we're gonna have them. And you can have them, too. Or you can have this bullet."
Starbuck goes on wishing that Apollo were less of a talker and more of a doer.
Zarek asks what proof there is that Adama and the Prez will do what Apollo says. Apollo says that he'll leave the ship in the prisoner's control if they release their hostages: "They try and come after you, you can still have your last stand." Zarek finally agrees, and orders his men to lower their guns. With Zarek out of the way, Apollo shoots the cell lock and moves inside, taking away Mason's gun before checking on Cally. It's the details like that that make me happy. As Zarek moves inside and leans over Mason's body, Starbuck finally takes aim. Apollo notices the laser sighting on Zarek's head, and pulls Zarek down just as Starbuck fires. The prisoners engage in hubbub as the Marines move in, and Apollo shouts, "Cease fire!" Starbuck's pissed at being deprived of a kill. Zarek looks satisfyingly shocked as he tells Apollo, "Thanks." Apollo calls for a medic for Cally. Zarek cries a little for his dead rapist shithead pal. Or something. You figure it out.
Later, the Prez and Adama are none too pleased by the way Apollo has given the Astral Queen to the prisoners. Apollo says that the prisoners were disarmed, and that there are no weapons aboard ship. Adama -- who totally can't believe that his son is this dumb -- snaps, "The ship itself is a weapon!" Apollo says that the prisoners are dependent on the fleet for food and fuel, and the men have agreed to help get the water that started all this. The Prez is stuck on the idea of holding elections within a year. Apollo notes that former President Adar's term is over in seven months, and according to the law, there should be elections then. Adama growls that Apollo sounds like a lawyer. Apollo clenches his jaw and says that he has sworn to defend the law, and that the law says there should be an election. He adds, "If you're telling me [that] we're throwing out the law, than I am not a captain, you're not a commander, and you are not the president. And I don't owe either of you a damned explanation for anything." And once again, I love their different reactions to this. The Prez looks rueful, but like she agrees, as she says, "He's your son." And Adama just looks infuriated as he rasps, "He's your advisor." He glares at Apollo for a second and says, "I guess you finally picked your side," before leaving. Which...yeah, I don't know. The side of the law? Stupid laws!
Starbuck enters Tigh's quarters to show him her cleavage. Or, wait, she's actually carrying a flask, and the cleavage is just incidental. I guess. She hands Tigh a cup, taking one for herself, and pours them each a shot, then gulps it down. Tigh sniffs the cup skeptically, then drinks before asking, "What the hell is this? Water?" Starbuck smirks that it is water, and that there's plenty more. She tries to bond by saying, "I have my flaws, too." Tigh stiffly says, "The difference is, my flaws are personal. Yours are professional." Starbuck almost chokes on her water. Heh. He's not wrong. Tigh thanks Starbuck for the water and dismisses her. Starbuck, looking astonished that anyone could genuinely dislike her spunky self, sidles out.
Tyrol and some of the ground crew visit Cally in her sickbed for some inspirational razzing. One guy asks if it's true that she bit a guy's ear off, and Cally says, "He's lucky that's all I bit off." The men chuckle indulgently, and Tyrol says, "That's my girl," and it's all fairly creepy and I'm not sure it's intended that way. I can sorta see guys acting that way around Cally, but yeah, icky.
The Prez is reading the book she got from Adama when Apollo enters her quarters. Apollo wants to explain that he wasn't being disloyal to her, and the Prez says that she admires his principles. Then she asks him to sit down, and after a slight hesitation, she tells Apollo that she has cancer. She swears Apollo to secrecy, saying, "Whether or not I survive this, it is of great importance to me that there's a future for the people. And I fear that knowledge of my illness will erode hope." Apollo assures her that she can trust him. The Prez teases him, saying, "I know I can; you're Captain Apollo," and she grins, and Mary McDonnell is just adorable. Apollo, of course, just looks embarrassed, but who cares about him?
time: sexy Starbuck flashbacks. Well, that'll either win me over to her, or determine that she's just as annoying as I suspect. Good times, either way. Oh, and I enjoy the ongoing violence in the R&D TV production card.