By Daniel
And then she goes and spoils it all by saying something stupid like, "I'm in love with two totally different guys."
It's the morning of the apocalypse: the final day. DeAnna says she could spend the rest of her life with either one of these guys. I suppose the producers prefer that to: "If I know at all what love is, then I already know who I want to be with, but I'm pretending to be equally in love with both for the sake of the 'drama.'" She says it's the toughest choice she's ever had to make, but she knows who she's going to pick, and she can only hope he feels the same way about her.
Jason goes ring shopping, picking what he thinks is a "classic yet modern" ring because that would really suit DeAnna's awesomeness, for whatever reason. Jesse looks like he's going to lose his lunch over having to do this. Did he and Jason have to do paper-rock-scissors to see who got first choice? Jesse picks out a ring and manages to not chunder all over the jeweler.
We watch endless shots of the three nimrods getting ready. DeAnna says it's going to be hard to send someone home whom she's falling in love with. "He's going to feel just as I felt the day Brad sent me home," she says. The difference, though, is that Brad is an asshole for doing it, and DeAnna isn't, because ... um ... what's the difference again?
I think at this point the show has entered into a weird dimension in which time has no meaning. It's a Star Trek episode. It's a Twilight Zone episode. It's a cautionary tale, a film that should be required viewing for scofflaws to scare them straight. I literally do not comprehend anything they say anymore. They are saying words that I used to know, but I do not recognize these people. I do not recognize them as people. They are images made up of little colored dots that are grouped together according to some sort of pattern, and -- it must be said -- an aesthetically pleasing pattern at that. But these images don't behave in ways that I think humans generally do. And I don't watch reality shows as a general rule, but I don't understand how one so supposedly intimate doesn't feature angry shots of emotional people yelling for the fucking cameras to be turned off for one second, at a minimum of once per show. It's so unreal. And I wonder how many people are taking this show as advice on how to conduct their romantic lives. And I realize it's a small subset of a small subset of people who actually bother with this show, but this show has the power to actually for-real ruin lives.
- 1
- 2
- 3
- 4
- 5
- 6
- 7
- 8