This week on The Bachelor: a bunch of girls want a solo date with Juan Pablo. They can't hide their disappointment when Chris shows up instead of JP, and he tells them that there will be two solo dates and one group date this week and reminds them that if the solo dater doesn't get a rose, she has to go right home, but if she does she's safe until the week. He then puts the date card on the table, and Cassandra wins the first one-on-one date. Renee reminds us that for her and Cassandra, the stakes are higher than for the others since they have kids too, just like JP.
While the girls fret about JP, he's having a picnic in the park with his daughter and parents in Long Beach, and says he's glad that after he has his dates, he can have regular family time with them. He reminds us of his promise to Cassandra from last week not to waste her time if he realizes this isn't going to work out, since she has a son and can't fuck around going on dream dates and pursuing a ridiculous falsified sense of love like the other women who don't have children. He's waiting for her with a gaudy green and grey topless Jeep, and while they cruise she tells us she hasn't been on a first date since she was 18 (she's only 21 now) which is why she's nervous. Girlfriend, it doesn't necessarily get better, by the way. He then turns and drives the truck directly into the water, because it's a Top Gear-ish truck/boat but works much better than anything on that show since it actually stays afloat and they go tearing around the bay.
Back at the house Renee and Elise are catching up, talking about why they came on the show. Renee figured why not, since dating as a single mom is hard. Elise tells Renee that her mom got melanoma and wrote a Bachelor application letter. After her mom passed away, Elise found the letter and took it as a sign that it was meant to be. Look, honestly, it's the best reason I could imagine to actually put yourself through going on this ridiculous show.
After tearing around on the water, JP drive-boats them up to a yacht and they get on and strip to their bathing suits. The two have a Bachelor-obligatory hand-holding jump into the water and then cuddle and make out. They then go to what I think is the house where JP is living and admire Camila's drawings stuck to the fridge as he tells us he wants to make it homey so that Cassandra will open up. This involves teaching her how to dance with their pelvises touching and Cassandra admits she's surprised to have "these" feelings. That's what happens when a man dances with a pretty girl, honey -- you might have forgotten in the three years since your last date, which has been mentioned now four times. Oh wait, she means EMOTIONS. My bad.
Chelsie and JP, meanwhile, go to Pasadena and get Venezuelan food for lunch, in advance of some sort of challenge that even has JP scared. The two then walk to this giant famous bridge, and while they do she admits she's a little bit afraid of heights. It's going to suck for her, then, that the challenge is to do a tandem bungee jump. I've driven by and under this bridge a million times and seriously, no promise of a date or even many thousands of dollars or anything else would get me to jump off of it -- I can't even look at the screen when the camera shows the view over the edge of the platform. Chelsie is surprisingly cool for a little while but finally starts to panic, though to her credit her level of panic doesn’t begin to hit the theatrical heights of most reality show contestants.
She tries not to cry, and looks very much like she might puke, and JP makes her look at him and asks what she wants to do. They step back off the platform, and JP quietly tells her that they are going to be okay and asks her to do it for him. Well, now I might puke a little bit. He tells her he'll do whatever she wants to do, and they get back on the platform but then step back to the bridge and he assures her he's fine with whatever she decides. The poor instructor looks a little fed up, and you can tell the time is steadily passing by the fog rolling in and setting sun. Chelsie is so moved by his sincerity, though, that then she decides that it's fine to fling herself out into the abyss. Once they finish bouncing, she and JP make out while hanging upside down. Of course JP thinks she's amazing, like he does about all of these women.
The two of them go to Pasadena City Hall (which is a super gorgeous building) where a table and candles are set up in the courtyard, and Chelsie tells him how awesome he was when she was scared. He asks him his biggest fear, which is not being a good example for his daughter. I hope that one day he sits his daughter down, then, and tells her that this is a terrible and unrealistic way to meet a mate and that maybe she shouldn't compete against a bunch of other women for a man she doesn't even actually know. Chelsie's biggest fear is not being happy, and she doesn't want to wind up trying to please everyone else and not fulfilling herself. She went against the grain by becoming a teacher when her family was filled with doctors and dentists. JP thinks that somehow he can tell through all of this that she's maternal.