Sleep Tight

The MoG lurk in the doorway while Cary goes back into the courtyard and introduces the singer as Kim. He asks her to take it from the top, and she obediently starts crooning that her heart is breaking. Suddenly, her strumming becomes jangly, her face morphs into something green and unpleasant, her eyes turn into blobs, and she growls, "I'll have your eyeballs out and rip your children in two!" And we laughed at Tipper Gore. Green goo pours out of Kim's mouth as she returns to normal and starts crying. Ew. That was nice and startling. I don't know what she's so upset about. I bet she could open for GWAR. Cary turns to the MoG and says, "Catchy finish, huh?" Credits.

When we return, Cary is telling the others that Kim "was throwing away her life in medical school when she should have been a singer." Gunn speaks for me: "Who needs more doctors in the world when you could have singing demons?" Kim explains that the morphing is a new thing. Angel rambles on about "singing demons, flying nuns," and basically seems to be drunk. Assume that he keeps interrupting throughout this scene. Kim explains that she joined a band made up of "mellow, organic types" a few weeks ago, but then the lead guitarist grew a seventh finger. Gunn confirms that the guitarist had six fingers to start with. Do you think he had six fingers per hand, or were they like cartoon people, with only three fingers per hand? Oh! It's not GWAR, it's Gorillaz! Wesley and Fred peer at a microscope while Kim describes how the other band members also began transforming. And as if that weren't bad enough, they started playing industrial "trash-noise-funk" music. Horrors! She asks if she's going to be completely transformed. Wesley says no: "You're human. They're not." He explains that she's been infected, and Fred adds that there's a cure involving regular doses of "mystical antibiotic." Stop turning the magic into science. Do a spell, dammit! Fred says she analyzed the green goo Kim was drooling, and found traces of "penloxia." You know what Fred can do? Fred can bite me. What did I just say about the pseudo-science? Sigh. Cary realizes that Kim's bandmates are actually "Wraithers," demons which can imitate humans for a week or two at a time. Gunn wonders why they'd form a band, and Angel answers, "For the chicks! Musicians get the chicks! What, they're gonna appear as dentists?" Heh. He asks where they are, and Kim directs them to the rehearsal space. Wesley tells Angel, Gunn, and Fred to go kill the Wraithers while he broods and frets some more. Fred asks if they should call Cordy and Groo for backup, but Angel merrily insists that it'll be a piece of cake.

Cut to Holtz's Hating Headquarters. Justine is holding a vampire back on a chain while instructing someone in the fine art of punching vampires. Looks like she's taken the Slayer impression so far that she's given up on actually killing vampires. That's a pretty dumb vamp -- it could just turn around and attack Justine instead of trying to pull the chain out of her hands. Justine shouts instructions at the Pseudo-Slayers, and yanks the vampire back. It attacks her, and she easily kicks it away and performs some chain-fu. Oh, maybe that's why it didn't attack her. Fair enough, I guess. She tells the others to keep practicing while Holtz looks on. They take the vampire off and practice punching it some more while Justine and Holtz wander off for a chat. Holtz complains about having his tea in a styrofoam cup, and Justine offers to get him some china. Aw. I bet she gets him a mug that says "World's Best Demented Vengeance-Crazed Morally Ambiguous Antagonist." It might have to be a really large mug. Or have very small print. Holtz observes that Justine has some qualms, and she hesitantly admits, "These people that work for Angel -- we may end up killing a lot of them." Holtz calmly notes that they might kill all of them, in fact. "Particularly that yappy girl with the accent," he notes. Sorry, that was me again. Holtz sneakily slips a knife out of his jacket as he asks whether she has qualms about killing "evil people who help vampires." Justine nervously agrees, "They chose Angel. That makes them enemy soldiers." From behind Holtz, Wesley suddenly asks if that "makes it all right." Holtz learned about security from Angel. Doesn't anybody lock his door? Holtz greets Wesley calmly, observing that he's "in the throes of a very difficult decision." Then he uses his knife to cut off a piece of apple that he picked up from somewhere. Or maybe that was up his sleeve, too? He should go to the Magic Castle with that act. Holtz offers Wesley a piece of overly symbolic apple. Although I'm pretty sure it should have been forty pieces of silver.

At the "rehearsal space," the Wraither band is playing while a couple of girls flail about. The singer has a half-demon face, the drummer has spines, and so on. The singer is also wearing gloves, so I guess he's the one with extra fingers. The song's pretty entertaining: "I hate your zit-face smile/ that's why I cut you in two/ scoop out your blood your brains your bowels!" And so on. Catchy! A trash can crashes through the window and Gunn, Fred, and Angel run in. Angel is covering himself with a blanket because of the sun, which I mention because I appreciate that detail. The singer says that they're going to pay for the broken window, but the drummer asks if they're "the A&R guys." Heh. Angel explains, "We're just here to kill you." The singer is still grumpy about the window, and then the drummer threatens to take "first ride" on Fred and leaps out toward the MoG. Gunn clobbers the drummer and tells Fred to escort the groupies outside. Gunn aims his crossbow at the nervous Wraithers, and then Angel vamps out and attacks. Fight! Without the stop-motion effect! Yay! Gunn fires the crossbow into one demon's throat while Angel kills the other two. Angel also rips the arm off of one of the demons. Fred and Gunn stare at Angel, still holding a severed arm, as he says, "That was fun."

At this point, Johanna and I determined that she's got voodoo powers. See, Johanna gave me an Angel figure a while ago, because she's mean. Then I got myself a Spike figure. I'd arranged them so that Angel was too busy staring at a velociraptor to notice that Spike was sneaking up behind him with a knife, because that amused me. I'm not sure which of the figures came to life while I wasn't looking, but one day I came out to the living room and found Angel had fallen on the floor and his arm had broken off. It was mysterious. So when Johanna came over last weekend, she wedged Angel's severed arm into his other hand, like he was going to club someone with his own arm. Or wipe away his tears with his plastic hand. Heh. Anyway, two days later we see Angel holding a severed arm in exactly the same way! Coincidence? I think not. Obviously, the step is to make a Connor doll and have Johanna smash it with a hammer. Anyway.

Holtz's House o' Haberdashery. Did Wesley stop shaving when Holtz lost the goatee? It's like there's a conservation of facial hair law or something. Wesley says he doesn't want to see anyone's "soldiers" get hurt. Holtz calmly insists that he hates violence, and snipes, "I've meted out a good deal less of it in my lifetime than Angelus has in his." Justine picks up a knife and says that Wesley just wants to stab them in the back. Wesley stares at Justine and asks who she lost to make her willing to join Holtz's team. Justine isn't in the mood to share, but Holtz chirps, "Her twin sister, Julia, was murdered by vampires." Wesley steps closer to the knife Justine is wielding and explains that Angel and the MoG are his family, adding, "When I say I don't want to see anyone get hurt --" Wesley suddenly grabs Justine and twists her around, holding her by the wrist and throat as he finishes, "-- I mostly mean them." Holtz waves his other Pseudo-Slayers back. Wesley adds, "I don't stab people in the back." Yet. Holtz pulls the knife out of Justine's hand and says he trusts Wesley. Holtz says, "Your problem is your friend, who's going to kill his own child." Hm, how does Holtz know about that? He says that if Wesley doesn't do anything to prevent it, Holtz will, but Holtz claims he doesn't want to endanger other people if he can avoid it. Wesley asks how long he has to do something, and Holtz gives him one day. Wesley exits silently.

At the Hyperion, Cary is telling the baby a story about the Rat Pack, using some stuffed animals as stand-ins for Frank and the gang. Odd. Angel, Gunn, and Fred return, and Angel heads straight for the mini-fridge and pours himself a tall glass of blood. I wonder what that stuff really is. I believe Karo syrup is traditional, but drinking that seems more disgusting than sipping actual blood would be. Maybe it's grenadine. Like an extra-strong Shirley Temple. Cary says that the baby "needs some Papa-love." Angel gripes, "Connor needs a bath, Connor needs a bottle -- what Connor needs is to grow up!" Everyone stares while Angel gets more agitated and yells at the baby to shut up. I should be unhappy at this development, right? Instead, I'm pleased to see Angel doing something besides grin and bumble around. Fred points out that the baby is...well, a baby. Angel shouts, "If he keeps it up, he's not gonna be a baby for long!" and throws his glass at the wall. Fred picks up the brat, who is clearly not making the crying noises that are audible. Dude, there's another baby in there somewhere! Gunn tells Angel to get a grip, and Angel stares at the blood dripping down the wall. Mmm, grenadine. "What's wrong with me?" Angel asks. Shall we start with the hair and work our way down the whole list? Although actually his hair has flattened out a bit lately. Now it's sort of a shaggy Spock-do. It looks somewhat like an animal pelt was placed on his head, and yet it's an improvement.

After the ads, Angel tries to figure out why he's acting so strange. Cary asks when Angel started drinking so much blood. Angel does not say, "Around 1753." Okay, so he's been drinking more than usual in the past few days. He insists that he got the blood from his usual butcher shop, although he admits that the last batch was unusually "tasty." Fred compares Angel's behavior to her "Aunt Viola and her Southern Comfort." Angel grumps, "Vampire. Need to drink something red. That doesn't make me a bloodaholic." Yeah, at least he's not addicted to magic, because then he'd really be in trouble. Sigh. Cary suggests that someone might be spiking Angel's drink, and Fred prepares to analyze the blood. Because of what Shack said.

Blipvert: bloody wall, Holtz's sleeve-holster. It's nighttime now, as Wesley walks along a suburban street. Is Holtz's Hideaway out in the suburbs, and Wesley walked all the way there and is walking all the way home? Shouldn't he be on his motorcycle? As Wesley approaches one house, he watches a father arrives home, to be greeted by his son and wife. I think we're all clear on the family theme. The camera sneaks up behind Wesley, and ducks behind a tree as Wesley finally stops and snaps, "I know you're better at following people than this." He turns around, and the camera finally moves out from the tree. I hate POV shots. Hate them, hate them, hate them. It turns out that the camera was playing the part of Justine, who strolls up as Wesley asks, "So what's the play?" She insists that she's alone, and that she wants to talk to Wesley about Holtz. Wesley says, "Great guy. Not overly tall...." Heh. Wesley made me laugh! Wow. Wesley turns his back to Justine and asks, "Is this the part where you offer to help me behind his back?" Okay, families and backs are the theme. Justine asks if he thinks it's a scam, and Wesley ignores her and rambles on that Justine thinks that Holtz is "noble and good," but that he isn't. Justine sniffs that Wesley works for a vampire. Wesley adds, "Who in fact is noble and good. Quirky, but there it is." I'm not sure if "quirky" is describing the situation or Angel. Probably the former, but the latter amuses me a lot more. Wesley says that Holtz claims to want justice, but that he actually wants revenge. Justine defends Holtz, talking about what he's done for his Pseudo-Slayers . Wesley sniffs, "It sounds like a nice cult." Justine insists that Holtz will keep his word, and snarks that Wesley is going to betray Angel, adding, "I imagine it's a lot easier to hate Holtz than yourself." Actually, I find it much easier to hate Wesley. Wesley stares blankly at Justine, advises her to be careful, and walks off. A moment later, Holtz says, "You are being careful," scaring Justine. She stares at Holtz as he menaces, "I didn't even hear you leave."

Back at the Hyperion, Fred looks up from the microscope and announces that someone's secretly switched the blood Angel normally uses with Folger's Crystals. Er...I mean, human blood. Fred can distinguish the blood cells of pigs and humans using a microscope. Sure, why not? Angel spookily intones that the blood is from the baby. When Gunn asks what makes Angel so sure, Angel looks embarrassed and whispers, "The past couple of days, he's smelled like food." So what? All people should smell like food to Angel. ["And most babies do kind of smell like fresh bread. They do!" -- Wing Chun] Gunn looks at the bundle of blankets he's holding and wonders if there's a baby in there somewhere. Cary explains that "they" wanted Angel to eat his son, and thanks for the remedial assistance, Cary, but I'm pretty sure we figured that out on our own. Fred wonders who "they" are. Angel's got a hunch.

Lilah's sitting by herself at a bar. The bartender brings her a fresh drink, and she takes it, then stares into the mirror behind the bar and hisses. "Like a cat," she insists, and goes on to say that lately, she's been able to sense when Angel's around. She turns, and sure enough, Angel's glowering at her. My guess is that the bartender reacted as if someone was behind her, and since she couldn't see anyone in the mirror, who else could it be? Lilah asks Angel how he found her, and Angel names her assistant. "I'll have his arms broken," Lilah notes. "Already taken care of," Angel grrs. Cool. He goes on to say, "There are so many things I could do to you. With transfusions, I could keep you alive indefinitely. I do have some expertise in this area." Boreanaz has elected to express angry menace with a peculiar stony lack-of-expression. It probably doesn't help that I watched L.A. Confidential earlier today. You know how Russell Crowe is just about vibrating with barely restrained violent impulses in some of those scenes? I think that's kind of what Boreanaz is going for here, and obviously he's not quite as effective at it, and even I can't really blame him for that. Angel's all, "How could you?" and Lilah duhs, "It's my job," and turns back to her drink. Angel sits to her and orders some whiskey. He's drinking! Neat. Lilah defends herself, "I've had to be better, smarter, quicker than every man at Wolfram & Hart." She adds, "As a result, I live somewhat dangerously and very comfortably." Lilah says something about putting on her game face every morning, and Angel hisses that someday she may not be able to take it off. Lilah looks stunned and says, "Wow. We've spent so much time and money on you -- you're so pivotal to the coming cataclysms -- that I sometimes forget how dense you can be! The game face? The one I worked so hard to get? I became that years ago. Just like you've become simpering and good from yours." Bwa! And that's when I fell in love with Lilah. Angel pretends that didn't sting, and after considering "I know you are but what am I?" and "So's your mom!" he finally responds, "I'm sorry if I hit a nerve." Lilah goes on giggling at dopey Angel and his lame comebacks, and concludes that his dropping by has reminded her what the meaning of life is: "It is all about making the rest of your eternal life miserable." She grins and drinks to that idea. Hee.

Suddenly Sahjhan says, "You backstabbing, traitorous bitch!" Angel and Lilah turn to see Sahjhan glaring at Lilah. He gripes that he was busy hopping through dimensions when he found Lilah "drinking with [Sahjhan's] sworn enemy." Angel, bemused, says that he doesn't remember swearing to be enemies, or even meeting Sahjhan, while Lilah insists that Angel found her. Angel asks whether the two of them are in "cahoots." He finally figures out that Sahjhan is "that screwball who brought Holtz back." Sahjhan insists that Angel won't learn anything from this chat. Lilah chirps, "Other than you're his sworn enemy who brought Holtz back, and when that didn't work out you came to me. Idiot." Lilah's feisty when she's had a few drinks. Sahjhan defensively explains that he doesn't always get audio when he's travelling between dimensions, so he jumped to conclusions when he saw Lilah and Angel "being all chummy." Angel asks what the source of Sahjhan's grudge is, and Lilah off-handedly mentions, "He wouldn't tell me either." She asks Sahjhan, "Did he boink your demon bride? Eat your mother?" Hey, Lilah? Remember how you just made fun of Sahjhan for giving Angel information? That was a good point. Sahjhan just stares at Angel and finally says, "You will pay." Angel, who has already gone from enraged to bored, half-shrugs and asks, "For what?" Sahjhan turns and stomps off into another dimension. I don't notice anyone else in the bar, although you'd think the bartender would have something to say about that. Maybe he knows Cary. Also, I know they're intentionally underplaying the dramatic confrontation and all, but maybe Angel should be vaguely interested in meeting someone who's been trying to kill him, instead of acting like Sahjhan is an annoying telemarketer. Sahjhan's probably just mad because nobody bought him a drink.

Wesley returns to the Hyperion and starts packing the baby's overnight bag. Cary enters from upstairs and asks what's going on, so Wesley explains that he's going to take the brat for the night so that they can go to the park tomorrow. He assures Cary that Angel approved the plan, and then determines that Fred and Gunn have gone to get dinner. Cary starts to explain what happened with Angel's freak-out and their important discovery about the spiked blood, but the kid starts crying because Cary's about to destroy Wesley's flimsy motivation for acting like a putz, and nobody wants that. Wesley picks up the baby and automatically tries to calm it down by humming a lullaby. Cary stares at Wesley. After a few bars, Wesley glances at Cary and freezes. Cool. After a second, Cary turns and runs for the office. Wesley puts the baby back in the bassinet and spastically runs after Cary, tackling him. Instead of explaining that he thinks Angel will kill the kid, and allowing Cary to clear the whole thing up. Oh well. Wesley's dumb. You heard it here first. They tussle for a minute, and then Wesley conks Cary on the head with an abstract sculpture or something, knocking Cary unconscious. Poor Cary, from small businessdemon to au pair to Giles impersonator in just one season. Wesley grabs the baby and bag, then turns to see Angel standing behind him. Gulp.

Angel calmly asks where everyone is, and Wesley realizes he isn't toast. Yet. Wesley explains that Gunn and Fred went to get food, and says that Cary had to go out. He reminds Angel that he wanted to take the kid to the park, adding, "I thought he could spend the night with me." Angel admits that's not a bad idea, and Wesley not-at-all significantly asks, "Want to say goodbye?" Angel takes the brat and gurgles at it, allowing it to suck out a few more brain cells. He says, "Sleep tight, big guy, Daddy will see you real soon!" We have a title! And a hefty dose of ironic foreshadowing. Angel nags Wesley about having the numbers for the doctor, and then asks if Wesley's heard of a time-travelling demon called Sahjhan. Wesley hasn't, so Angel wonders if Wesley could do some research before leaving. Just then, Gunn and Fred return, asking where Cary is. I'm amazed that this scene is tight enough that I actually feel some sympathy for Wesley, who is counting the seconds till Cary wakes up. Then I realize that it's not that amazing, because for once Wesley and I want the same thing: the baby must go. Still, I love the tension in this scene. Angel asks whether Cary said where he was going, and Wesley casually says that he isn't sure. He goes on to tell Angel, "I've got better reference materials for your demon at home, and Connor's getting pretty sleepy. Why don't I look into it there?" He reaches out for the baby, and Angel waits a second before finally handing the kid over. Wesley cuddles the kid, scratching it to bits with his scraggly whiskers, and sighs, "I guess...I'll see everyone tomorrow." He's almost gone when Angel quizzes him about the closest emergency room to his apartment. Wesley says that "Drue Medical" is one minute from his place, and has a "top infant-care center." Wesley, practically shaking with relief, hurries out as he assures Angel, "Don't worry!"

Angel sits down and starts whining that he'll be spending his first night without the kid, while he compulsively fills the bassinet with stuffed animals. Gunn says, "We'll stay up with you." Don't enable him! Great, now I'm using pop psychology. Angel thanks Gunn, explaining, "You know, he's just a little guy." I'm not sure why, but I thought that was a cute line. I don't know. I don't like babies, but overprotective dads are kind of endearing when they aren't acting like drooling morons. I don't need to make sense, do I? Angel starts to say something else, but is interrupted by the sound of Cary moaning in the office. Before they can investigate, Holtz enters from outside, and his Pseudo-Slayers appear from upstairs and the various other entrances. Excellent. I love it when they keep piling things on. And I do think Greenwalt's underappreciated, so there.

After the ads, Angel nervously mentions running into Sahjhan, to see if Holtz reacts to his namedropping. Holtz shrugs it off and asks, "What did he have to say?" Angel admits, "I didn't quite get what his deal was," while one of the Pseudo-Slayers sidles up to look in the bassinet and then shakes his head at Holtz. Angel asks if Holtz knows why Sahjhan's so irked, but Holtz admits that he doesn't really care. Holtz calmly looks around and asks, "Where is the little nipper?" They spend a minute or so trying to out-cool each other, and then Holtz tells his troops, "I want to keep Angelus alive. But not well." The Pseudo-Slayers leap into battle while Holtz watches. Fisticuffs ensue. Angel smashes the weapons cabinet open with a handy body and tosses some weapons to the MoG. Someone's about to stake Angel when Fred fires a crossbow into the Pseudo-Slayer's spine. Yow! Part of the melee moves into the office, and Cary wakes up and takes in the situation. He stands up and emits a high screech, which causes everyone to cover their ears. He then kicks one Antihero and stops squeaking so that Gunn can knock out the other. Holtz decides he's seen enough and heads for the door as Angel tosses the last Antihero across the room. Angel instructs Fred to call Wesley, and then tells a battered Cary to have a seat. Cary sadly reports, "They didn't do this to me. Wesley did." He expositions about what happened and reports, "He's been to see Holtz behind your back. Twice. And he's not taking the baby overnight -- he's taking the baby away. For good."

Cut to the street outside Wesley's apartment. I quiver in anticipatory delight. Wesley lugs the baby and a suitcase out to his SUV. Which he can afford because of...maybe it's a rental? Then he turns off the car alarm. Do rentals come with alarms? He's just about to put the baby in the car when he hears a noise. He turns and notices that someone has instantaneously destroyed his building and replaced it with a park. As if that weren't disconcerting enough, Justine is stumbling toward him in pain. Wesley pulls out a gun and shouts, "That's close enough!" Justine crumples to the ground, clutching her arm, and Wesley slowly advances on her. She sobs, "He's everything you said!" and Wesley lowers the gun and asks what happened. Justine comes closer so that we can see cuts and bruises on her face, and reports that Holtz took everyone to go after the baby. "I'll kill him for this!" she moans. Wesley offers to take her to the hospital, and then Justine suddenly springs around Wesley, pulls out a knife, and slices his throat. In slow motion, so I can savor every moment. Justine manages to catch the baby as Wesley crumples to the ground, and she rushes to the SUV. Wesley clutches his neck and collapses, watching as she drives away. Yay! That was even better than when he got shot!

At the Hyperion, Gunn insists that Cary must have misread Wesley's intentions. Fred reports that Wesley isn't answering his phone or pager. The various Antiheroes groan from the floor, and Cary asks if maybe they should take the wounded to a hospital. Angel figures that Holtz was stalling to gain time for Wesley, and figures they'll be together. Gunn says, "We don't know the whole story here," and asks Angel to stay calm. Angel snaps, "I'm not interested in what you think! He took my son!" Gunn tries again, and Angel grabs Gunn by the jacket and pushes him across the room. Fred pushes them apart and shrilly (and boy, do I mean shrilly) insists that they have to find the baby. Angel brushes past Gunn, picks up one of the Pseudo-Slayers, and asks where Holtz is. When the guy isn't forthcoming, Angel throws him across the room and moves on. Angel pulls an arrow out of the Pseudo-Slayer's stomach and holds it toward his face, repeating his question. The Pseudo-Slayer helpfully offers an address, and Angel drops him, picks up a sword, and leaves. Gunn and Fred agree that they should look for Wesley. No! No, you shouldn't. Not until he's had plenty of time to bleed to death. Poor Cary says he'll stay at the hotel in case Wesley returns for some unknown reason. After a moment, Cary picks up a baseball bat from behind the front desk and shouts, "And this time I'll be ready!"

We're outside Holtz's Home for the Hirsute, and SUVs are busting out all over. Lilah steps out of one, joins a pack of Wolfram & Hart commandos, and gets some confusing information that doesn't add anything, so I'm skipping it. The short version is, she's looking for Holtz. A commando reports that they've just spotted him "near the Sixth Street bridge," and everyone prepares to move out. I wonder what the neighbors thought when their street was suddenly packed with Humvees. A couple of commandos are quickly attacked by Angel, who knocks them out and takes their Humvee.

Justine pulls the SUV to a halt to pick up Holtz. He gets in and confirms that things went well. Justine says, "You're paying for my dental work," which Holtz finds amusing. He turns to look in the back and tells the baby, "Hello, son. I'm your father, and that strong lady with the black eye is your mother. Your name is Steven Franklin Thomas, and you're going to grow up with me on a little ranch in the middle of nowhere." Um. Well, okay, I guess. I'll give up Holtz to lose the brat. Especially if Wesley dies, too. Holtz asks Justine what Utah's like, and they drive off. Utah? Man, and I thought I hated the kid. Suddenly, Angel's Humvee drives up to them and cuts them off. And then the commandos appear, and everybody's hopping out of their cars because it's time for the grand finale! Or else they need a potty break.

Angel races for the SUV, but Justine tackles him. By the time Angel's up again, Holtz is holding the baby and shouting, "Come any closer and I'll snap his neck!" The commandos aim their guns at Holtz. Holtz, calmly as ever, asks, "Who are they?" Lilah explains that they work for her, and says that she wants the baby. Angel isn't keen on that, and Lilah asks, "You'd rather see the fanatic with the baby than us?" She seems a little hurt. The standoff continues, with Holtz observing that everyone wants the baby to stay alive. "Not all of us," Sahjhan intones as he appears out of nothing. He tells Lilah, "You want the child dead. That was our arrangement." Lilah says, "Yeah, I'm a lawyer, have you met me?" She says she's keeping the kid, and Sahjhan gets irritated because everyone keeps screwing up his perfectly simple evil plans. Poor guy. Holtz says, "We're leaving," and he and Justine move back toward the SUV. The commandos move in, but Angel clobbers one and takes his gun, aiming it at Lilah. What a stupid commando. Angel says, "Your bullets won't kill me, but mine will kill you." Angel looks at Holtz, who purrs, "[The baby] will be dead before I hit the ground." Holtz says he's leaving, and that if anyone tries to stop him, he'll kill the kid. Somebody, try to stop him! Angel hesitates, and then tells Holtz to go. Sahjhan shouts, "What is wrong with you people?" Holtz bizarrely promises that he'll take care of the brat, and assures Angel, "He'll never even know you existed." I'm not sure that's comforting. Then Holtz thinks better of his plan: "If you come after me...you will, though, won't you? Maybe I should just...." He grabs the baby's neck. Angel tells Holtz to take the kid. At this point, I've given up on trying to make sense of Holtz's plans from one moment to the .

Sahjhan tries to clear things up by chanting something that causes a big special effect to appear. The sky sorta rips open, lightning zaps out, and a mess of red swirls appear. Sahjhan says that this is "the Quartoth, the darkest of the dark worlds." Oh, that Quartoth. He explains that unless somebody kills the kid, he'll open the portal further so that everyone falls into it. When no one moves, he gestures, opening the rip further. Lilah gives in, and orders the commandos to kill the kid. Angel shouts, "No!" Holtz leans over and shoves Justine for reasons that aren't clear, then races over and leaps into the rip. Angel runs after Holtz, and I think that Holtz shoved Justine into Angel's path, to block him. It's still confusing, though. Anyway, Holtz jumps in, and when Angel nears the portal, some lightning zaps him, throwing him back. Sahjhan says, "Wow. I didn't count on that. Kinda takes care of my problem." He does another chant, and the rip closes up while Angel stares dumbly. More dumbly than usual. Sahjhan obscurely adds, "Have a good summer," and vanishes. Justine stumbles back into the SUV, and Lilah gripes about her paperwork. One of the commandos asks if he should do something about Angel. Lilah says, "Yes, we should. We should let him suffer." Angel slowly stands up and expresses as little as possible. He looks like he's about to say, "Guh?" Or possibly, "Hey!" Justine drives away. I think maybe they shouldn't have shown us Angel's expression. He could have covered his face with his hands. That's a plausible reaction. And it would probably be more affecting than seeing him stare after the SUV with a look that seems to say, "But...I was supposed to buy some milk at the store! Damn!" In slow motion, yet. An overdubbed Angel says, "Connor." I hardly knew her! About this time my phone rings. I figure it's Johanna, but it's actually Theresa, my sister-in-law. (Theresa, this is everybody. Everybody, this is Theresa. Hi, hi.) She asks, "Are you happy now?" I laugh malevolently. And that's all until mid-April. ["Wooooooooooooooo!" -- Wing Chun]