Go Sox! And props to J-Bean for cashmere and strawberries.
Previously on America's Top Model: Jamaica! Cassie is a stripper! Amanda has a degenerative eye disease! Julie did really well last time (which totally means she's out this episode)! You suck, Magdalena! Back to New York! Janice thinks Kelle looks like she has a penis! So long, Leah!
New York! The Waldorf Astoria! The show opens with Cassie saying she's so hungry that her stomach hurts, as she prepares herself a delicious head of lettuce for dinner. Less roughage and more fiber, honey. She interviews that she is "very obsessed" with her weight and what she eats. There's a weird shot of the girls eating while sitting on the floor in a hallway. What, are they all playing hide and seek with Amanda again? If so, I'm sure there is ample time for a three-course meal (lettuce, celery, sugar-free mint). Julie asks Cassie how much weight she wants to lose, and Cassie says she'll keep dieting until she likes how she looks. Cassie says she is determined to be a model, and that she'll do what it takes to be skinny enough. She then does leg lifts in a tank top and underwear. Sigh. Here we go.
Amanda sits in the phone room and talks to her son, Eli. She sings "itsy bitsy spider" in a weird, baby-talking, three-year-old kind of voice. Seriously, it sounds like "Issy bissy spidew cwaled up da wadder spoud." Eli lets out a howl at the horrendous sound. See, even he knows she's a cheeseball, and he's only three! And how do I know he's three? Well, see below. Amanda interviews, "Elijah is my light...my Jah Wolf." Jah Wolf? Like Virginja Woolf? Like Teen Jah Wolf? Like Wolf Man Jah? What the fuck is that? Because I just don't understand. And then, like any decent red-blooded American, I Google. Scroll to the end. You guys? I hate her.
Back on the phone, Amanda says, "Mama loves Eli," which, let me assure you, is the first of many times in this episode that we'll be treated to someone referring to her or himself in the third person. She interviews that he is the most magical child she's ever seen. He's a leprechaun! ["Of course, the field of children she's seen isn't all that broad." -- Wing Chun] But seriously, lest you think that she's just being like any normal mom who believes that their baby invented spit bubbles -- "And have you ever seen anything so adorable as spit bubbles? Just look at them!" -- she says that he was "conceived to the hour on September 11th" and gives a knowing nod. Okay...WHAT? I mean...WHAT? First of all, "to the hour"? What does that mean? And second of all, I mean, Jesus. If you want to brag about how your kid was conceived on your honeymoon, or on the first time you ever had sex, or in the back of a Studebaker convertible, then fine. No one really wants to hear it, but whatever. But to tout the fact that your child was conceived in the midst of a national tragedy...it's just not right. And, judging from the link above, she's a bit too enamored of this fact. You guys? I really hate her. Amanda is totally the new Ann. Sorry to be so cranky, but that whole thing really irked me. In the good news column, we don't have to feel bad about the blind jokes anymore. Yay!
Back to the house. The girls are eating, and Yaya says of Amanda, "This is the mommy of the house." In this scene, by the way, Julie is wearing a hilariously large pair of sunglasses on top of her head. Oh, I love Julie. Damn this show! Amanda interviews that she is a "wonderful, loving, hippie mom that wants everybody to love each other." If by "wonderful, loving, hippie" she means "skanky, irritating, blind" then I am in total agreement. Amanda says, "Whenever anybody needs something, ask me and I'll get it." Cassie, having eaten one lima bean, says, "I'm full now." Amanda, I think that means she wants a barf bag. Hop to it, why don't you.
Tyra Mail! A rhyming couplet indicates that it's time for makeovers. Whooooop! May I just note that, in this scene, Amanda is wearing a bra and low-riding jeans that totally show her underwear. It may seem trivial, but I'm collecting evidence to justify my hatred of her. It's only four minutes into the show, and I'm feeling pretty confident that I'll have an indisputable case in another six. Julie says, quite hilariously, "Maybe I'll get rid of this good Indian haar." Oh, Julie, the times we had.
We are at the Peter Coppola Salon. Mr. Jay explains that the girls are there to get a makeup lesson, and that he is going to teach them how to get a clean, fresh, easy, breezy, natural look using Cover Girl cosmetics. Which, let me assure you, is the first of many times in this episode that we'll be hearing about Cover Girl cosmetics. And, of course, the girls will get hair makeovers, which, as we all know, is where the real drama happens.
Tyra comes out, and tells the girls about their new looks. Kelle will get wavy extensions. Julie will get six to eight inches removed. Tyra loves that Yaya keeps her hair natural, which shows the pride that she has as a black woman (and I'm really surprised that they didn't go to Kelle for a reaction shot here, since this seems like an obvious dig), but her braids are going to go. Tyra asks Yaya what her biggest insecurity is, and Yaya says, "Well, my legs are a little stumpy." Kidding! She says her skin, of course, and Tyra reveals that she's set Yaya up with an appointment at a leading dermatologist. And she does say "dermatologist," mind you. Ann will be going blonde. Tyra sees Nicole in I Love Lucy red. Better than Ronald McDonald red, I guess. Toccara will get extensions. "Kristi" will be made edgier with chic long bangs. Jennipher is getting mad hair cut off and going blonde. This news is totally making her brown eyes blue. Tyra says that her hair will be donated to Locks of Love, and Jennipher is glad that it is going to a worthy cause. Cassie is getting a weave. Amanda is getting icy blonde hair to go with her icy blue eyes and her icy crap personality. Amanda does an annoying little dance (which, may I add, she's shown a penchant for in past episodes) and yells "WORK! IT!" Shut up, Amanda. Eva, who looks totally stoned, will be going a bit shorter. Norelle is getting a big-ass cut, and her braces will be coming off today. Yay!
Nicole says that while some girls are excited for their makeovers, some are not so happy. An obviously ecstatic Norelle says, "I've never seen myself without braces." Never? I mean, literally never? Well, in all fairness her brain is pretty small, so there might not actually be enough room for long-term memory in there. Jennipher, quite expectedly, is crying. And quite unexpectedly, so is Eva. Eva fears that shorter, blonder hair will make her look like "a little white boy." Dude, if it worked for Catie...oh, wait. Tyra tells Eva that the big time means big changes, so she should suck it up. Amanda interviews that she tried to be kind and giving to the girls in crisis because that's part of who she is as a "mama." You know, as a rule I am usually suspicious of people who describe themselves as "kind" and "giving." This case is no exception. Shut up, Amanda.
Jennipher sobs that her hair is sort of a security blanket to help "get [her] recognized" and "get [her] somewhere." Wow, she must be a real star at the Pocatello Dairy Queen. That is seriously one hair that I would not want to find at the bottom of my Peanut Buster Parfait. The stylist cuts off a giant hunk of hair and she immediately looks better. ["They showed this clip when Tyra was on Ellen this week. Unfortunately, Tyra followed Aron Ralston, that dude who got trapped in a canyon and cut his own arm off, so Ellen couldn't help observing that, in light of his story, seeing Jennipher crying over losing her hair sort of lost some of its impact." -- Wing Chun] Kelle and Toccara are eagerly awaiting some of the transformations. Toccara notes that the thought of Amanda with blonde hair is a little scary. Sing it, T. Ha! And then there's a shot of Amanda posing seductively in front of the mirror. Asshat. Amanda thinks her new look will be "hot...really really hot," and that her eyes will shine. Nicole says that her new color will make her go "Pow!" Before and after shot of Nicole. Eh. It's a little more "Pew!" right now, but trust me, it'll grow on you.
Jay teaches "Kristi" how to apply Cover Girl cosmetics. She doesn't look much different at all. Toccara's hair is a bit longer, and she really does look great. She says, "You can shave my head off bald, and I'll still walk around here like I'm a goddess." You know, I'm not always a fan of Toccara's shtick, but at times like these I really think she might be able to take this whole thing. If Janice ODs and is unable to cast a vote. Cassie looks mostly the same, but weirder. Norelle is hilarious while getting her hair cut, and even cracks up the stylist. You guys, I can't help it. I love Norelle. Ann says she's excited to go blonde, and is very open-minded. Afterward, she cries. Ha! Jerk. It really did look better darker, though. Cassie finds it funny that people are getting so upset about hair. "It's just hair! Ha ha!" she laughs. Hey Cassie...it's just a calorie! Ha ha! Eva is fine with her cut and color. Jay tells her that she has a little bit of a moustache. Heh.
Ann interviews that Julie is beautiful, but only has one look. Julie notes that they didn't really change her hair, but that in some ways she takes that as a compliment. She says she feels like "This is me and this is how I should be looking." Yaya and Norelle head to their special appointments. Yaya says she's thrilled to have the opportunity to go to a real dermatologist, who prods her pimples and steams her pores. However, the caption identifies her doctor as "Debra Jaliman, M.D. - Dermologist." "Dermologist"? What does it all mean!?! The dermologist gives Yaya a topical product. Jay tells Yaya to use a heavy, silicone-based makeup to cover her flaws, which doesn't sound like it would help the pimple issue, but whatever. Yaya has a cool 'fro. Her before and after reads a little like Alice Walker to Macy Gray.
Tyra Mail. The girls head to an Indian restaurant (oh, foreshadowing) where Jay Manuel -- in a cream-colored blazer with a fucking sequined lapel and no shirt underneath, no less -- greets them and introduces them to Cover Girl Kiara Kabukuro (KK). I'm sorry, but he is not deserving of the title "Mr." I'm going to start calling him The Widow Jay. Or maybe The Dowager Jay.
The Dowager Jay says that the girls will be tested on their skill at creating a natural look using Cover Girl Cosmetics. Julie asks KK if, as a woman of ethnicity, she feels like she has a lot of competition in the modeling world. Well, she'll have one less ethnic competitor by the time this episode is over, Julie. For today's challenge, the prize will be the opportunity to attend, with The Dowager Jay and KK, "a very fabulous industry party where you're going to meet all these influential and beautiful people." The challenge consists of the girls all piling into one limo and doing their hair and makeup, as well as getting dressed, in ten minutes on the way to the party. Jay calls this a "realistic situation."
The girls get in the limo. Jay counts down and someone, who appears to be Yaya, leaps across the others to get to a bag of products. Pandemonium! Concealer is flying! Models are in various stages of undress! Because I'm thorough and I take my job very seriously, I played this whole scene in slow motion. Oh, fine. Just in case the editors accidentally left in shots of any naughty bits. Sadly, they did not. More pandemonium.
At the party (and Jay has TOTALLY drawn on man cleavage with Cover Girl eyeliner, by the way), The Dowager Jay and KK evaluate the girls to determine the winner. Yaya is not confident because -- guess what? -- she has bad skin. Amanda, who looks like a freaking streetwalker in a pair of cut-off jean shorts and black midriff-baring top, thinks that she looks good, and that she followed the makeup instruction well. But too bad, Amanda, because Norelle is the winner. Yay! Norelle gets to take three buddies, and she picks her roommates -- Eva, Ann, and "Kristi." The four of them get to wear Anand Jon fashions to the party. And Anand Jon is there -- try to contain your excitement. But he is Indian, and guess what...so is Julie! Anand looks like an Indian Fabio.
The rest of the girls have to wear catering outfits. Because they're serving the food. Ha! Cassie pissily interviews, "Our loser prize was to be a server for the night and wear this horrible polyester outfit that was hot. Bow tie and everything." Oh, be glad that you get to be there at all, you skank. Norelle is excited about her first industry party. The girls enter, and you could drive a Mack truck through Ann's cleavage, which is prominently on display in a deep v-neck dress. The four winners mingle and meet some freaks of the fashion world. The other girls work and serve. Kelle, having never dried a dish in her life, breaks a glass. Cassie is disappointed: "In Oklahoma, people look at me, and I don't feel like people are looking at me here." Well, in Oklahoma you're naked, wrapped around a pole, and gyrating. So if you want some attention, bust out the pasties. She's not having much fun. Oh, poor, poor small fish.
The winners tell Anand that Julie is also Indian. She is? Funny that's never been mentioned. Julie does an impression of her mother that is really funny. "Why are you dressed like that? Boobs and butts are showing this way and that way!" Awww, Julie. Julie interviews that she's setting a goal for Indians, who are usually engineers or doctors. You know, people who build things and help others. Now that doesn't sound like fun, does it? Well, if Cassie is a reliable source, neither is modeling. So I guess Indians are shit out of luck in the fun department. Julie gets down with some traditional (or at least costumed) Indian dancers. Yaya interviews that Julie cracks her up (Me too! Sigh) and that it's nice to see someone who's proud of her heritage. Kelle.
In the limo on the way home, Toccara says that she doesn't have oily skin like Yaya. Their interaction is very playful, but that still seems kind of mean. The girls get Tyra Mail, which tells them that they'll have "a close-up to see whose beauty is true" the following day. Yaya still has pimples, and her complexion makes others question her viability as a model. Amanda says that the girls, having seen her "boost of confidence," have started treating her "less like a safe person to be around and more like actual competition." She's totally like one of those people in high school who says she has no friends because the other girls are all jealous. Newsflash, Ray Charles. You're a jerk! That's why no one wants to hang out with you. Shots of Amanda brushing her new, long hair while admiring herself in the mirror. Ugh. She's the worst.
Photo shoot. Today, the girls are going to do beauty shots -- close-ups of their faces -- the most difficult kind of photo to do. Today's shot is about a clean face, so the girls are going to have to be makeup-free. Not even bronzer! Oh, the cruelty. Yaya is nervous, and says that she initially thought, "This test is a personal attack against Yaya." The girls will be "modeling" Nivea hand cream. Whatever, Nivea makes a good product.
Danilo works on Amanda and asks her how it feels to wake up with her new hair, and whether she's been possessed by its owner. If the owner was Joan Crawford, then yes. The Dowager Jay and photographer Troy Ward work with the girls. Ann is first, and is a bit tight in the jaw. Toccara should be conjuring up Iman. Nicole throws in some interesting hand movements which, in her own words, are like, "I'm in the middle of sex...playing with the hair and grabbing your neck." Methinks Nicole is quickly becoming a fan favorite. Eva should be thinking of beautiful moments. Danilo tells "Kristi" not to try to look like the Mona Lisa, because it doesn't sell products. "Kristi" should have a talk with Nicole about what sells products. The photographer says that "Kristi" "was the most limited of all the girls as far as the looks." Ha! He said "Kristi" is fug.
Yaya was initially worried, but that after preparing herself "mentally and spiritually," she was okay. The Dowager Jay thinks that Yaya was a trouper for exposing her hideous skin to the world. Jennipher is a bit jowly. Norelle is going to have to work in the mirror and find confidence in her face. Julie has a hard time connecting with the camera. Kelle needs to think outside the box and give more expressions. Amanda says -- yet again -- that the makeover boosted her confidence, and that she has a strong personality and "a strong talent." Oh, shut up. The Dowager Jay says that she's become stunning. Amanda says that she totally "felt it" and completely "worked it." Man, I've got to create a macro of "Shut up, Amanda."
Cut to a shot of Cassie telling Amanda, "I don't want to get disqualified because, like, I have an eating disorder." Oh, Cassie. Cassie asks Amanda to keep it quiet. Jennipher interviews that Cassie told Amanda that she was bulimic, and, like wildfire, the gossip spread. And everyone is still at the photo shoot, so Amanda really wasted no time in sharing this information. The girls discuss the fact that eating disorders are bad. Which they are. Norelle says that it's going to eat her alive, because it's such a huge secret, and that Cassie must feel horrible inside. Who is the voice of kindness and compassion in this situation? Norelle. I'm just saying.
Cassie comes out of the bathroom and tells the other girls not to go in there because she felt very sick to her stomach. Oh, Cassie. Now I have to create a macro for "Oh, Cassie." The girls discuss the fact that she was in the bathroom for forty minutes. Ann says that Cassie presents an unhealthy image for the youngsters, because little girls shouldn't think that modeling entails puking to be thin. Bulimia is unhealthy in many ways. Ann wants to stage an intervention. Cassie interviews that she should never have told anyone about her problem or trusted the other girls, and that she doesn't want to be played up as the "mentally unstable bulimic girl." It is a sad fact that "mentally unstable bulimic girl" has become an archetype. Cassie worries that her eating disorder will be used to get her out of the competition. Cassie does well in her photo shoot, and The Dowager Jay says that once she receives validation, Cassie shines.
Eva says that Amanda is a complete ass for telling Cassie's secret. You know what? Preach it, Sister Eva. Eva says, "She plays this role that she's the sweet, nurturing mother...if someone decides to confide in you, why don't you let it be between you and that person." E.g. You may think it's cute, but girl I'm not impressed. I'll tell you one time only with my business please don't mess. Cassie says that she has "a will to be skinny," and that if anyone takes issue with that, it's their problem and not hers. Amanda asks why Cassie would confide in her if she didn't want others to know, or didn't want help. Cassie interviews that she doesn't care what the other girls think, and that she's still going to try to "do me" (what the hell does this mean? Would someone please explain?) and to win the competition.
Back at the house, some of the girls sit down for dinner. Cassie, in her "Cassie" wifebeater and underwear, confronts them and says that her "past problems with eating" are not currently an issue. Yaya can see why Cassie would be hurt having everyone talk about her. Cassie doesn't consider herself bulimic, because she doesn't throw up after everything she eats. Oh, Cassie. She also says that the girls can come to her with questions, but that she doesn't want people talking behind her back. She can't even remember the last time she threw up. Um, except that it was this morning. She tells the girls that she is not bulimic, but that she has an obsession with her weight. Cassie has grown up dreaming of being a model, and plus-size modeling (shot of Toccara) is not for her. Ann says that it doesn't matter how many times you throw up -- "if you do it once, if you do it five times" -- you still have an eating disorder. Thanks, Dr. Ann, for that clinical diagnosis. And also, little people have to work two, or sometimes triple as hard as everybody else. You know, this is making me depressed. Why is retinitis pigmentosa so much funnier than bulimia?
Eva is still pissed. She doesn't trust anybody. Eva says that Amanda is intimidated by Cassie's beauty and wants to have the upper hand and to get Cassie out of the running. Amanda is on the phone with her mother, and talking in her freaking baby voice again. "Tell me I'm a good person...I did something wrong and I shouldn't have...I just told something a girl told me in confidence...I feel so bad." Amanda's mom says, "Just try to stay out of all that crapola," which is totally exactlywhat my mom would say to me in that situation. Amanda interviews that it wasn't her place to bring Cassie's secret out into the open, and now everyone thinks she's an evil backstabber. If the stiletto fits...
Tyra mail! Elimination tomorrow. Toccara and Nicole are psyched to get some competition out of the way. Eva says that you can't have an eating disorder and win this show, and that if it gets back to Tyra, Cassie will be eliminated. Suspense!
So, not that anyone asked, but here's my take on the whole thing. Cassie obviously has some problems, and appears to be crying out for help a bit. So what does she do? She confides in the self-proclaimed caretaker of the house. I can understand if Amanda feels that remaining silent about this will create an unhealthy or even dangerous situation for Cassie. But you know what? If that's the case, talk to Cassie, or talk to the show's staff, or even confide in one trustworthy friend to help you figure out what to do. It's not a bad thing to try to actually help Cassie. However, Amanda did not try to help Cassie. Whatever her motives were -- and I'm not sure that they were entirely nefarious, I just think that she's a jerk -- she gossiped without hesitation, and without consideration of the fact that this would make Cassie more secretive and defensive about her problem. Because Amanda sucks. But Cassie still needs an intervention, and you can be sure that it's coming in another week or two. And seriously, all I want to do is hear Janice snipe. When did this show stop being fun?
A beauty shot of Tyra behind a giant green leaf leads us to the judging panel. Tyra does her usual spiel, and Janice mouths the end of it with her, which is so funny. Oh, Janice! I have never needed you so much. Thank you, just for being you, and for bringing the world such joy. The girls get prizes: Ford Modeling Agency, Elle magazine, Cover Girl Cosmetics. Tyra introduces the "interesting, wacky, but highly intelligent judges." There's the usual crew -- Janice, Nigel, and gay Nolé with his queer little dog -- and special guest judge Danilo, Butt Pirate of Penzance. If you haven't seen the show, I really can't describe what Danilo looks like to you any better than that.
The Dowager Jay administers yet another makeup test. The girls have to use Cover Girl Cosmetics (yawn) to apply a "clean day" look to one side of their face, and a "night diva" look to the other, all in ten minutes. Man, I wish they had to make one side a man and one side a woman and then duet with themselves on "Endless Love." Now that would be a challenge. Whooping. Pandemonium.
"Kristi" is up first. Janice tells her she looks like Cousin It. Ha! Man, I love recapping the judging. I don't really have to make any jokes at all. If anyone tells you that Janice Dickinson has not improved the lives of others, you send them to me. Nolé likes "Kristi"'s bangs. Tyra explains that the girls will be judged not only on their pose, but also on the amount of retouching they needed. She tries to make "retouching" sound so mysterious, like none of we plebeians have ever heard of Photoshop. "Kristi's" photo is boring and she has dead eyes. Janice calls Eva "EVA DIVA!" The judges like her photo. Her un-retouched photo is a little rough, and Janice yells, "Help! Stop in the name of love!" Cassie's photo looks good, with the exception of her hand. Cassie barely needed any retouching. The judges are impressed by Jennipher's new look, but her photo is boring. Janice says that Jennipher has what it takes, but is not "bringing it."
And now, Amanda. As she walks forward, Janice goes "MANDY!" quite salaciously. Nolé says, "Where'd you come from, baby?" and freaking Amanda says, "Your dreams," and gives a really smug, coquettish look. Amanda? Shut up. Tyra says Amanda looks like "Annie Lennox meets Daryl Hannah from Splash. On behalf of Annie Lennox, I take offense. They ask how Amanda likes her new look, and she says as soon as she had the hair on she could "feel the sex." Just like she felt the sex on September 11. The judges jizz all over her photo. Janice says she could be on the cover of Danish Vogue. Nolé says she has made the transition from broken rag doll to queen. Her photo needed very little retouching. The judges actually give her a round of applause. Man, this is all she needs.
The judges love Nicole's new color, and her photo is great. Toccara looks great, and has "skin as fine as honey." The judges are impressed by Norelle's teeth, and once again she did a great job on her makeup. Danilo says, "It looks like you've got every hand in the photo." I mean, she has two hands in the photo...so that would be all the hands she has, right? Danilo talks in a strange, tranquilized way. He's freaking me out. Norelle's untouched photo is fug. Janice yells "Help!" and says with disgust, "I need blinders." She actually shields her face with her hand so she does not have to look at the photo. Man, Janice is on fire tonight.
Ann once again does not live up to expectations. The judges criticize Julie's outfit, which is totally cute, and do not like her photo at all. And then, Janice asks Julie why she wants to be a model. Julie says that she wants to get into the industry and learn about it so that she can open her own apparel manufacturing company. She has never had "model confidence." Oh, Julie. Janice pounces on this and positively spits out, in a way that is kind of reminiscent of the Wicked Witch of the West, "Ahhh, you didn't want to be a model, you want to be a manufacturer." The judges are not impressed.
Yaya's picture looks great, and she achieves softness. She needs to work on her skin. Nigel tells her to drink a lot of water. Janice is totally shielding her face again. The judges love Kelle's new look. But Nolé says that she looks bland in her photo, and Nigel says that she looks like a deer in headlights. And then, they take a look at Kelle's un-retouched photo. And this section I watched about sixteen extra times for my own pleasure. Janice says, "It's like a Hitchcock film" and then asks the tech guy to go back and forth between the shots really fast. Janice adds the sound effects of "eeh ooh, eeh ooh, hahh hooh, hahh hohh," and then cackles. Seriously, that was the greatest. I want my doorbell to do that. Tyra asks Kelle what she thinks, and Kelle says that she's always been told that she has beautiful skin, and that she knows there were times when her eyes were very intense. Tyra jumps all over this, and tells Kelle to accept responsibility and not blame the photographer. Kelle says she's not blaming the photographer, and Tyra says rather sharply, "YES YOU ARE." Tyra seriously hates Kelle.
The judges deliberate. Janice is digging Eva, and, in the words of Danilo, "Danilo thinks she's beautiful." Oh, Danilo. Jennipher is striking, but her photos suck. Ann is meh. Yaya is good. Nigel doesn't get Norelle, and Janice thinks she looks like a parakeet. When shown a photo of "Kristi," Janice says, "Oh my God, help!" Julie's photograph is poor, and she totally blew it with the manufacturing crap. Tyra says that she was extremely turned off that Julie said she was using the modeling world to get somewhere else. Huh. I'm suddenly getting the urge to shake [ma] body, body. Amanda is flawless. Toccara looks great, but Janice hates fatties. Cassie is pretty, but not fantastic. Nicole is an up and comer. Kelle's photograph stinks, and Tyra thinks she blames other people for her own lack of intensity. Nigel says that he hates it when people say how beautiful they are, and that in fact they should wait for a panel of judges to tell them. At this, Janice gives a funny little laugh, and I have a feeling that, had the shot not been cut right there, we would have seen her pull out a giant Ziploc bag containing her old face, and then do a bit of the old "You're so pretty, Janice!" "No, Janice, you are!" routine. Janice says that she's feeling Toccara over Kelle, which, let me tell you, bodes poorly for Kelle.
The following women are still in the running towards becoming America's Top Model: Amanda, Nicole, Eva, Yaya, Toccara, Jennipher, Cassie, Norelle, Ann, and "Kristi." Will Julie and Kelle please step forward? Both of your pictures suck. Kelle, you played the blame game. You need to hear a critique and say, "I can do better." Or, if this show is any indication of the new wave of grammar, "Kelle can do better." Julie, what's with the manufacturing shizzle? You both lack passion, and Tyra is so disappointed in the. Both. Of. You.
Julie is eliminated. Boo! According to her, the one time in her life that she was honest, she got burned. That, my friends, is a lesson learned. She's sad that this is over. Goodbye, Julie. Potes will miss you.
week: Miss J. teaches the girls how to walk! America's Top Model, Yoanna, is there to help. The girls get to partake in a "surprise runway show" that is a dream for Norelle, but a nightmare for the night-blind Amanda. Face? Meet runway.