By Potes
It's early go-see week! But first, the sloppy sluts engage in some coffee making. Fatima has some coffee in the press, and apparently Lauren throws it out. Or maybe there really wasn't that much coffee in there in the first place. In any case, this is all a demonstration in Lauren actually having a secret load of stank, as she makes a fresh batch and tells Fatima to choke on it. And more! Awesome. The girls head to Elite, where they are broken into two go-see teams and get a GPS cell phone to help them navigate, as they'll have to walk the whole time. Team one is Claire, Dominique, Whitney and Stacy-Ann. We'll call them, "Team Happiness and Harmony, Until the Alarm Clock Goes Off." Team two is Lauren, Fatima, Katarzyna and Anya. We'll call them, "Frankenstein and the U.N."
The teams first head to Pamella Roland, where Whitney gets confirmation that size 10 = hoss. Then again, Fatima is too skinny for Pamella Roland, so maybe the bitches are just like my mother: never satisfied. Whitney fares better at a go-see with Shoshanna Gruss, formerly known as Jerry Seinfeld's jailbait girlfriend. She actually likes to use different body types in her runway show, so Whitney regains some of her hoss confidence, much to the chagrin of Dominique. Lauren retains her Lurch-like quality throughout all the go-sees, including the final one with Alice + Olivia. Team Happiness and Harmony, Until the Alarm Clock Goes Off wins, with Stacy-Ann booking the most jobs of all the girls. They get to shoot a summer beauty story for Seventeen.