By M. Giant
Ryan walks through a double rank of the female half of the top 24, asking if "one of these faces" could be the first female American Idol in five seasons. "There's only one way to find out." But that won't be for another three months, so you guys can come back then. I got this. Sigh.
The announcer hails the entrance of the judges and Ryan to the stage, and the all get a warm reception from the audience, even though Jennifer appears to have her shorts on backwards. But at least Ryan has a tie on. Ryan reminds us that the guys sang last night, the girls will sing tonight, and five of them will end up getting voted into the top 13, along with the five guys with the most votes and one wild card chosen by each judge. Ryan brings out the girls: Chelsea Sorrell, Erika Van Pelt, Jen Hirsh, Brielle Van Hugel, Hallie Day, Skylar Laine, Baylie Brown, Hollie Cavanaugh, Halie Johnsen, Shannon Magrane, Jessica Sanchez, and Elise Testone, all of whom are quite dressed up for the occasion.
We're getting started tonight with someone nobody remembers, I guess for the benefit of those who are a little late tuning in. Chelsea Sorrell is from Stokesdale, NC a town with one road and a grocery store called "Bi-Rite." She drives the length of the town and shows us some outdoorsy activities -- as well as her mom, who looks younger than Elise Testone does. The band steps on Ryan's intro of Chelsea's song, "Cowboy Casanova" by Carrie Underwood. Chelsea sings it on a stage projected to look like the inside of a burning barn. She does fine, but it's not exactly going to blow anyone away coming out of the gate. Randy questions her wisdom in singing a Carrie Underwood song, like Carrie Underwood is so untouchable. I guess in this world she is. Jennifer gives Chelsea an excuse by saying it sucks to go first, which she figures is why Chelsea sounded a little nasal. And Steven warns, "When it's time to belt it out, belt it out good," which, it's not hard to find the criticism in that. She takes it all pretty well, like she's just happy to have gotten this far and anything beyond this is gravy.
After quick post-performance, post-ad interview with Chelsea in the wings. Ryan's down among the guys off the stage, borrowing Heejun's glasses and trying to crack him up. You're out of your league, Seacrest. thing you know we're in South Kingstown, Rhode Island, which hometown girl Erika Van Pelt calls "green hell." We also meet her mother "Mama V.P.," her sister Sarah, and a house full of Van Pelts (seriously, one feels pelted by Van Pelts) before she says this is a nice break from carrying the same DJ speakers for ten years. Tonight she's asking Heart's musical question "What About Love?" while working her throaty voice and a sleek new haircut. Jennifer says she could have pushed it further, but thinks she's amazing. Randy compares her to Adele (get used to that) and acts like a singing DJ is such a big deal. Has anyone reading this been to a wedding in the last ten years where the DJ didn't sing at some point? As far as holding back, Erika basically tells Ryan she meant to do that, and we come back from the ads in time to hear her admit she's a little worried but plans to do more. Were these moments here with the guys last night and I missed them somehow?
It's Jen Hirsh's turn. She's from Agora Hills, California, with a little apartment and a little dog and a little boyfriend and a family that owns a little vineyard, which we get to see. Thank you for reminding me I'm not drinking, Jen. She sings "One and Only," and she certainly pulls off her Adele song better than Eben did his last night. She makes it look easy, effortlessly giving a smooth performance without a lot of belting and yelling. She's screwed. But Jennifer thinks she was the first one to come out and let loose, Steven thinks Jen has what it takes, and Randy calls her one of the best singers in the competition. So maybe I've underestimated the judges where Jen Hirsh is concerned. Ryan interviews her about Adele, and Jen says she's been through an Adele-type situation herself. So Jen also had throat surgery, announced a five-year hiatus that she turned out to be kidding about, and flipped the bird on British TV? No wonder Jen connected with the song so well.
Before moving on, Ryan asks Randy to compare the two genders so far. Randy admits that after watching it back, they went a little easy on some of the guys last night. Ryan asks names, but Randy's not about to go out on that limb. So thanks for not answering the question, Randy.
On to Brielle Von Hugel from Staten Island. Try to act surprised that she's a high school cheerleader. Of course her mom Camille is there too, and Brielle claims she's become like a mom to everyone else. She doesn't say how many of the other competitors hate their moms. Brielle's singing "(Sittin' On) the Dock of the Bay," starting out sitting on the edge of the stage (of course), surrounded by some of the male semifinalists. She sings the first chorus all mellow and laid-back and unassuming, but then goes up an octave for the second half, which kind of makes me want her to go back to mellow and laid-back. But Steven's impressed, Jennifer says people underestimate her, and Randy goes so far as to compare her to Janis Joplin. He's going to feel embarrassed when he watches this back later. Ryan comments on Brielle's comfort level onstage, and lets her demonstrate it further by inviting her to help recite her own voting instructions. Which she does with conviction. And she seems pretty excited backstage afterwards.
A producer is trying to escape from the stage, but Ryan's hanging onto her hand and preventing her from getting out of the shot. "Go!" she snaps when he finally releases her. We're reintroduced to Hallie Day, 24 and from Baltimore. She's kind of amazed at how far she's come. We see her at her little waitressing job, and in her little house, and to her giant husband. She's singing "Feeling Good" with way too much electric piano, but she sounds good, all torchy and bluesy and looking more glamorous than damaged. At least until she stops singing, at which point she goes back to looking like Kim Basinger's daughter in a Lifetime Network Original Movie. The judges are all impressed, although Randy pointedly asks her who she wants to be, and where she fits in the Adele-slash-Lana Del Rey landscape we're living in. Because it's an American Idol's job to fit into the preexisting paradigm, after all. Ryan points out her husband in the audience, like he's tough to spot.
Skylar Laine is up, from Brandon, Mississippi, and of course her home video shows her ATVing, hunting, and twanging all her vowels like her throat contains a leprechaun jumping up and down on her vocal chords. She shows us around the town, including her family's anachronistic grocery store-slash-restaurant. She's singing a rock song, "Stay with Me" by the Faces, but it's a country version that would have Reba McEntire telling her to tone it down a little. She sounds like if you cut her she'd bleed barbecue sauce. She's having a fantastic time, though, obviously, and eventually my immunity to how much fun she's having starts to break down. But just in time, she winds up her energetic performance with a big long note at the end. Randy calls her "the rockin' country girl," Jennifer says she can tell she's a natural performer, and all Steven says is, "Keep it up." Somehow, after all that dancing and jumping and hollering while being strapped into that tight dress, she's not short of breath until now. Which she attributes to lots of breath control practice, but Ryan had better get her off that stage before she passes out. That would be so Hollywood round.
Baylie Brown is . She shows off her family menagerie of animals, the outside of her old high school (apparently she's not allowed on the grounds) and an old photo of herself with a facial injury sustained during softball. She's been staying with her granddad, who gets the news that she's in the top 24 on her contestant-cam. He's as proud as anyone can be who doesn't understand what she's telling him. She sings "Amazed" by Lonestar, and I have to say that as a singer, she looks quite pretty tonight. See you in another five years, Double-B. I actually cringe at one point. Steven says he's heard her sing better (shit, I've sung better), Jennifer charitably calls it shaky, and Randy didn't think she really had control of the song. But they all agree that she looks great. Afterwards, in the wings, Baylie admits the comments were a little rough, but she hopes America looks past her pounding heart. Actually, I think her best hope is if America's attention was focused directly in front of her heart.
Time to meet Hollie Cavanaugh for the second time. She's 18 and from McKinney, Texas. She shows us her home and her brother and her dog and her odd off-British accent. She's singing "Reflection" tonight, from a stage that's lit to look so much like an aquarium that I expect her to sing while twiddling her lips so it sounds like she's underwater. She's got a big voice that she's not entirely comfortable with yet, and she stands stock-still behind the mic stand for the whole song, but she does well overall with what is a pretty cheesy number. Steven says she hit all the notes and wants her to let her hair down time. Jennifer, who seems to have taken it upon herself to remind us whenever a contestant has tried out before, says she knows Hollie can do more. Randy agrees that she has a little to work on, although she remains one of their favorites. Ryan reminisces with Hollie about her first audition in Austin last year and throws it to ads after giving the voting instructions, but not before pinning down exactly how creepy Steven was being with the comment about letting her hair down.
By M. Giant
Baylie Brown is . She shows off her family menagerie of animals, the outside of her old high school (apparently she's not allowed on the grounds) and an old photo of herself with a facial injury sustained during softball. She's been staying with her granddad, who gets the news that she's in the top 24 on her contestant-cam. He's as proud as anyone can be who doesn't understand what she's telling him. She sings "Amazed" by Lonestar, and I have to say that as a singer, she looks quite pretty tonight. See you in another five years, Double-B. I actually cringe at one point. Steven says he's heard her sing better (shit, I've sung better), Jennifer charitably calls it shaky, and Randy didn't think she really had control of the song. But they all agree that she looks great. Afterwards, in the wings, Baylie admits the comments were a little rough, but she hopes America looks past her pounding heart. Actually, I think her best hope is if America's attention was focused directly in front of her heart.
Time to meet Hollie Cavanaugh for the second time. She's 18 and from McKinney, Texas. She shows us her home and her brother and her dog and her odd off-British accent. She's singing "Reflection" tonight, from a stage that's lit to look so much like an aquarium that I expect her to sing while twiddling her lips so it sounds like she's underwater. She's got a big voice that she's not entirely comfortable with yet, and she stands stock-still behind the mic stand for the whole song, but she does well overall with what is a pretty cheesy number. Steven says she hit all the notes and wants her to let her hair down time. Jennifer, who seems to have taken it upon herself to remind us whenever a contestant has tried out before, says she knows Hollie can do more. Randy agrees that she has a little to work on, although she remains one of their favorites. Ryan reminisces with Hollie about her first audition in Austin last year and throws it to ads after giving the voting instructions, but not before pinning down exactly how creepy Steven was being with the comment about letting her hair down.
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Ryan and Jessica Sanchez are sitting waaaay too close together on stools on that big stage. Ryan introduces some video of Jessica crying over some voice troubles she's been having all week that have made it hard for her to rehearse. Then we get her home video from San Diego, which is all about her going to the mall to shop and her supportive family. She sings "Love You I Do," which I take it is one of the most popular songs ever recorded by Yoda. It's a good thing she got to explain about not being able to rehearse. Not that she sounds bad at all. I mean, her first few lines aren't perfect, but maybe she'll get a little extra slack. Oh, wait, she doesn't need that slack at all, because by the end she's blowing it out. Jeez, she either just made a miraculous vocal recovery or she's this season's hustler. The judges give their first standing ovation of the night, and Randy can't make himself stop yelling "yo." He says she's one of the best voices of both nights, and both he and Jennifer are impressed with everything she did. Seriously, they can't shut up about her. Steven says the timing comes out of her fingers, whatever that means. Obviously she's pretty pleased with how that went.
The last singer of the night is Elise Testone, from Charleston, South Carolina. We get to see the beach, and her morning workout, and a visit to her very huggy parents in New Jersey. Elise is also singing "One and Only," although unlike Jen, she starts behind the piano and isn't nearly as smooth. Not that that's what she's going for at all. She's obviously feeling it, and ends up making a good end to the show. In fact, Elise confesses to the judges that she almost cried during her performance, which was why her voice cracked. My question: which time? Jennifer says she might be the best singer here, and she and Randy both hope America "gets" her. In her interview with Ryan, she says she only gets in trouble when she thinks, and shows off the flowers in her hair that she saved from her room service meals. Okay then.
The capsule recap of tonight's performers displays a lot of variety. I mean, some of these singers were really good, and...well, there was a lot of variety. Ryan opens the lines for the two hours and quizzes Randy on tonight's standouts. Randy comes right out and names Elise, Jessica, Shannon, Jen, Erika, and Skylar. Jen's favorites were Jessica, Hollie, Skylar, and Jen. Steven names Elise, Jessica, Hollie, and Hallie. No unanimity on anyone, except Not-Baylie. Ryan then asks who their favorite guys were last night, like they can remember that far back. Randy's favorites were Phil Phillips, Joshua Ledet, Deandre Brackensick, Colton Dixon, and Heejun. Jennifer also likes Deandre, Joshua, Phil, and more. Steven also liked Joshua and Deandre, as well as "White Chocolate" Adam Brock. Ryan says it's up to us now. Well, not the guys any more. Ryan promises a "jam-packed" two hours tomorrow. I hope not. The less that happens, the quicker I get to start drinking.
By M. Giant
Ryan and Jessica Sanchez are sitting waaaay too close together on stools on that big stage. Ryan introduces some video of Jessica crying over some voice troubles she's been having all week that have made it hard for her to rehearse. Then we get her home video from San Diego, which is all about her going to the mall to shop and her supportive family. She sings "Love You I Do," which I take it is one of the most popular songs ever recorded by Yoda. It's a good thing she got to explain about not being able to rehearse. Not that she sounds bad at all. I mean, her first few lines aren't perfect, but maybe she'll get a little extra slack. Oh, wait, she doesn't need that slack at all, because by the end she's blowing it out. Jeez, she either just made a miraculous vocal recovery or she's this season's hustler. The judges give their first standing ovation of the night, and Randy can't make himself stop yelling "yo." He says she's one of the best voices of both nights, and both he and Jennifer are impressed with everything she did. Seriously, they can't shut up about her. Steven says the timing comes out of her fingers, whatever that means. Obviously she's pretty pleased with how that went.
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By M. Giant
The last singer of the night is Elise Testone, from Charleston, South Carolina. We get to see the beach, and her morning workout, and a visit to her very huggy parents in New Jersey. Elise is also singing "One and Only," although unlike Jen, she starts behind the piano and isn't nearly as smooth. Not that that's what she's going for at all. She's obviously feeling it, and ends up making a good end to the show. In fact, Elise confesses to the judges that she almost cried during her performance, which was why her voice cracked. My question: which time? Jennifer says she might be the best singer here, and she and Randy both hope America "gets" her. In her interview with Ryan, she says she only gets in trouble when she thinks, and shows off the flowers in her hair that she saved from her room service meals. Okay then.
The capsule recap of tonight's performers displays a lot of variety. I mean, some of these singers were really good, and...well, there was a lot of variety. Ryan opens the lines for the two hours and quizzes Randy on tonight's standouts. Randy comes right out and names Elise, Jessica, Shannon, Jen, Erika, and Skylar. Jen's favorites were Jessica, Hollie, Skylar, and Jen. Steven names Elise, Jessica, Hollie, and Hallie. No unanimity on anyone, except Not-Baylie. Ryan then asks who their favorite guys were last night, like they can remember that far back. Randy's favorites were Phil Phillips, Joshua Ledet, Deandre Brackensick, Colton Dixon, and Heejun. Jennifer also likes Deandre, Joshua, Phil, and more. Steven also liked Joshua and Deandre, as well as "White Chocolate" Adam Brock. Ryan says it's up to us now. Well, not the guys any more. Ryan promises a "jam-packed" two hours tomorrow. I hope not. The less that happens, the quicker I get to start drinking.
M. Giant is a Minneapolis-based writer with a wife, a son, and a number of cats that seems to have settled at around two. Learn waaaay too much about him at Velcrometer, follow him on Twitter, or just e-mail him at m.giant[at]gmail.com.
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